FEAST YOUR EYES / ft. Eleanor Forte (original song)

[@overworkedwarlock94]

After listening to the song again, I'm starting to notice a possible link to certain tarot cards; specifically The Hanged Man and Ten of Swords.

[@pridenightstar8067]

i agree due to details in the illustration

[@FriendlyNeighboorhoodGoofyGoob]

Mind in a state of decay ❌ Mind in an ate of slay ✅

[@harpy7094]

Usually I don’t comment but felt I had to because of how strongly this song resonates with me. I have sexual childhood trauma, I wish I told someone, I wish I didn’t endure just because that person promised me things I didn’t have… Just like the two voices in the song I keep bickering with myself: “It’s my fault, but I was just a kid” “I could let go, but I can’t” “it wasn’t that bad, but it was” etc… I especially loved the line at 1:20 “it’s not like they hurt you in real life” while I accept what happened to me, every night I get torturous nightmares; it doesn’t leave physical signs, making me feel like the world is gaslighting me into believing that if it’s just in my head, it’s not real or impactful. Thank you for this great piece of art, I will always come back.

[@thebingus7243]

LYRICAL ANALYSIS IN REPLIES :3 i think this song is likely about someone with sexual trauma. the two voices seem to describe a back and forth between a past and present version of the same person. the younger squeaky voice is a person who went through a sexual relationship that they later on regretted. the title "feast your eyes" and the line "at least they're eyes are fed" implies they went through these encounters for the sake of making their partner happy (and also seems like play on the term "eye candy"). this past version seems to view their actions as worth it despite the pain because "they were well beyond their years" implying they see themselves as mature enough and because it was for their partner. the older version in return looks down on their younger counterpart, blaming them for their detached view to sex. in return they try to seek out sex to fulfill the pit it left in past due their regret. however, their sexuality is still actively used self harm and as a standard for themself "this isnt good enough". They gratify these feelings though because they view they're partner as someone "too kind" who deserves sex and because they haven't conquered their fear like they are supposed to. EDIT: just noticed eleanor is credited as being a "inner demon" and "outer angel". i think the younger voice is the inner demon- as they are a repression of this girl's trauma that is inherently demonized by her. the older voice is the outer angel as that's the feelings they are trying to portray: someone unaffected by trauma who doesnt associate with her past. an idealized version of herself, hence an angel who is supposedly pure and untouched.

[@thebingus7243]

Yknow what lyrical analysis line by line caused i LOVE this song. "How could you let me go end up like this?" OS (Older self) finds herself struggling with trauma from back when she was younger. She thinks that she has grown to be a more different person from her YS (younger self) but still finds she is living with the trauma from when she was younger. As a result, she almost seems to blame her past self for her own pain. "At least you exist" The YS is completely different from the OS as an effort from the OS to differentiate herself from who she was. as a result the YS feels almost like a memory of someone who only now exists in memories. "But is this any way to live?" OS is unhappy with how she lives, hence her desire to change herself. "Just cut your tongue and get a grip" Shows the mindset of the YS, that her own feelings aren't worth anything and that she needs to be a stronger person. A mindset that may have lead her to a struggling to refuse sexual relationship. "I thought your purpose was to handle me" I'm not fully sure about this line. I think it might be the OS blaming the YS for ruining her future. Her past self was meant to set herself up for the future to live a fulfilling and healthy life. instead the OS now finds herself heartbroken and scarred, looking for retribution. "Handle all your tears?" The YS would have found that the future self should be more capable to deal with her feelings, after all she is more grown and capable than how her YS is. "Why was I unable to fear?" and "Your mind was well beyond your years" The OS hates and wishes that her YS should have been more scarred of her sexuality. She feels that herself in the past should have been able to realize she was not ready to make herself vulnerable like that to sexuality. On the other hand the YS believed that she was "mature enough" for something like that despite her youth. ""Why don't you know how to get out of here" and "Isn't it insane?" Her YS never actually acknowledged the trauma she experienced and dealt with it. as a result her OS is having to find herself out of the emotional whirlwind she is living with. "Your every action comes with pain, This is just the path you paved" Her OS is blaming her YS for this trauma but in reality the YS sees them as the same person, and understands they need to live the consequences together. "But hey, it's just a game, That isn't what you said that day, Don't you speak another word, I think I had enough" This reflects on the YS's view of the sexual trauma. She didn't take what happened seriously and tried to brush off her own pain. Her OS on the other hand remembers her own hesitance and fear more clearly from back then and is able to see her past more objectively. "Tie me upside down inside my bedroom in the dark" A very interesting portrayal of expressing yourself sexually. the lyrics portray a visual of someone almost holding them themselves out on a line like bait. they see themselves as something to be consumed. additionally, the YS is the one singing this, showing that this was her perceptions of the sexual trauma. as much as they deny their own feelings, they were truly scared and hurt by the experience. "(I think I had enough), (But have you?)" The YS feels overwhelmed and wants to end the sexual encounter, but she fears she still isn't doing enough to make her partner happy. "Let all of my blood rush to my skull then break it hard" The YS seems to want to be able to dissociate from the trauma, almost wishing she was unconscious so she didn''t have to remember what is happening to her. "(This isn't good enough), (No, it's not good enough), But now at least his eyes are fed" the YS fears she is being an insufficient lover despite all the pain is putting herself through to fulfill her perception of a good partner. However ultimately, she numbs what she's feeling through the idea that she is "making her partner happy" so her pain is worth it. "I wonder daily that maybe I'm to blame, With choices that I wish weren't made" Ironically, this can imply that her partner was to blamed for what happened. I'm not sure if this could be an implied grooming situation or if this was a consensual relationship that her YS was simply too young experience healthily and that was later regretted though. Regardless her OS blames herself and wishes that she hadn't made the choice to "consent". "I couldn't take it, I hoped that you were dead, The profound sense of dread you gave me" The emotional tolling over the trauma made the OS want to change heavily, so much that she see her YS as someone who is no longer seen in her. After all, the trauma occurred to her YS, so she sees that her YS was the one at fault for all of her pain. The more she can dissociate from who she was the more she has someone to blame. "(Why are you still sulking over little things), (It's not like they hurt you in real life)" Once again the YS is diminishing what the OS is going through. However the second line can change a bit of the interpretation on this. It seems to imply nothing physical actually happened in the YS's younger trauma. It likely may have been something that happened online that may have been stopped before things got physical. this may add credit to the idea that her YS was groomed but may have been saved before things got physical (which adds another layer to the comment where the YS said she was mature enough to handle sex) "This isn't what you said it'd feel like, Maybe you're too dumb" The OS is now going through a sexual encounter in the present day. However it wasn't like how her younger self pictured things would go. She imagined she would be able to handle things after reinventing herself but she is still the same little girl who never acknowledged her she was hurt. "Why does it make me wanna die?, You're there still mourning hordes of flies" The OS is wondering why sexuality makes her feels so bad. but her YS sees that her OS is still holding onto old wounds regardless how much the OS says otherwise. The "old flies" paints the visual of a corpse, which goes along with the art, which seems to have flies lining the edges of the image. The implications of this being that the OS sees herself as a revived corpse, still dealing from wounds from back then and trying to stop herself from decaying further. "I don't mind, they've been too kind" The OS is justifying that she should go through with sex because she is with a "nice guy". It's actively reusing the same mindset from back then. "Shut your mouth and go away, Don't let me see your face" An interesting contrast. When her OS disagreed with her, the YS just told her to shut up, meaning that her YS just didn't want to think about how how her trauma would affect her in the future. However when the same thing happens, the OS wants to shut out and forget about the YS entirely. -chorus repeats except this time parts of it are sung by the OS- The OS is following in the footsteps of what her past. She is forcing herself through these sexual encounters without accepting what she's feeling and that what is happening is hurting her. She accepts the pain though for the sake of her partner and because she "should" be over what happened. "Give me all the pain you felt back then when you were young" Despite her hatred towards her YS, the OS just wants to be able to look back on her youth for the good things that happened. By repeating the trauma, she is forcing herself to get used to the pain but also to lessen the severity of what happened to her YS. "(I hate you)" As much as the OS wishes it, in reality she is only hurting herself and her relationship to her past. "I don't know how I could leave it, nothing's good enough" She fears she'll never be able to untie the trauma she feels. In her perspective, the OS feels no matter what she does she is never recovering from her sexual trauma in the "correct way". .... and that's it! gosh if you can't tell i adore this song!! kian if you're reading this i hope you found my interpretation at least fun to read at least! its a great song! any other viewers, I hope this helped you come up with your own interpretations, in which case please share!!!

[@kiandoesnt]

i wasn't sure how to respond initially without implying that other possoble interpretations are "wrong" or something but i just wanted to say that i really appreciate these comments 😿💕 these are the feelings i was trying to get across while writing

[@AHRandolph]

I love this analysis, it really helps to paint the vague and emotional medium of songs into a story that can clearly be expressed with words. I could tell this song was about unhealthy romantic relations and past trauma but re-listening to each line while reading your interpretation really helped me understand this beautifully scary piece.

[@softcoffee5832]

"Its not like they hurt you in real life" The downplay of their own trauma is gut wrenching.. Lovely song none the less, keep up the great work

[@StardustLegend]

I am F E A S T I N G 👀👀👀👀

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

I really love the sonar textures in all your works (your recent ones are especially amazing), and I've been hooked on your Vocaloid albums the past few days. Your songs are surprisingly empathetic - and describes some emotions and scenarios rather well. Beating yourself up over past mistakes is a fuckin mood - and forgiving yourself is often SO much harder than just being your own personal devil. Regardless, Im a big fan of your works - they're all honestly really well done.

[@kazaster9624]

I dont know if you'll read this but I hope that you'll feel better with time, i like the song a lot and i know from experience talking about these kinds of things are really hard but it can really help! Just make sure you're avoiding the stresses that you can avoid while processing it , that also helps, take care 🫂❤

[@plasmapengi]

Ok I really liked the original but this definitely an improvement, the art looks much better now and this tuning is still heavenly

[@RyouTheChocolateBar]

Eating up the 8D background vocals. I can hear her in one ear and then another and it's amazing!!!

[@corncobbob2326]

I found this on my feed and aside from it being a song, I don't know what else this is but I know it will have more views.

[@OGTwistedDobermanXCVI]

Sounds like the tornadic apocalypse that's obliterating my mind fiber by fiber with each passing day....

[@raspberryhooligan.6406]

This tastes like raspberry jam And I love raspberry jam

[@PauloAdvincula-y4s]

Here's the lyrics: . . . . . How could you let me go end up like this? at least you exist. but is this any way to live? just cut your tongue and get a grip. I thought your purpose was to handle me... handle all your tears? why was i unable to fear? your mind was well beyond your years. why don't you know how to get out of here? isn't it insane? your every action comes with pain. this is just the path you paved. but hey, it's just a game. that isn't what you said that day. don't you speak another word, i think i had enough. TIE ME UPSIDE DOWN INSIDE MY BEDROOM IN THE DARK. I THINK I HAD ENOUGH- I THINK I HAD ENOUGH, but have you? LET ALL OF MY BLOOD RUSH TO MY SKULL THEN BREAK IT HARD. THIS ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH- NO, IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH. but now at least his eyes are fed. i wonder daily, that maybe im to blame with choices that i wish weren't made. i couldn't take it, i hoped that you were dead. (why are you still sulking over little things?) the profound sense of dread you gave me. (it's not like they, hurt you in REAL. LIFE.) this isn't what you said it'd feel like... maybe you're too dumb. why does it make me wanna die? you're there still mourning hordes of flies. I don't mind, they've been too kind. that isn't what you said that day? shut your mouth and go away, don't let me see your face... TIE ME UPSIDE DOWN INSIDE MY BEDROOM IN THE DARK. I THINK I HAD ENOUGH- I THINK I HAD ENOUGH, but have you? LET ALL OF MY BLOOD RUSH TO MY SKULL THEN BREAK IT HARD. I THINK I HAD ENOUGH- I THINK I HAD ENOUGH, but have you? GIVE ME ALL THE PAIN YOU FELT BACK THEN WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG. IT ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH- IT ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH, i hate you. i don't know how i could leave it nothing's good enough... IT ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH- IT ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH, at least his eyes are fed. *THE END*

[@undecidedmusic]

I love it!! The artwork, the back and forth between vocals , the composition! Everything!! Awesome job!!

[@ShowdollP]

This song is great! Especially a fan of the illustration. Well done Kian!

[@Æuvelity]

OH YAY SPOTIFY RELEASE?? IVE HAD THE SONG ON LOOP SINCE IT CAME OUT

[@fascher_]

1:30 LOVE THIS PART

[@teim_kima]

AS BEAUTIFUL THIS SOUNDS, I CAN'T. I dream of drawing illustrations for such beautiful songs..

[@lumenstar-main]

!!! UNDERRATED ARTIST SPOTTED !!! SOUND THE ALARM

[@syrussanborn4416]

close enough welcome back anthy himemeya!!! IN ALL SERIOUSNESS THIS IS SO GOOD I LOVE THE DUAL VOICES AND BEAT ITS SO INFECTIVE

[@randomotakunerd]

This was insanely good! Good job, dude!

[@TemporanFact]

thumbs up to youtube recommendations this time around

[@usouu]

we’re feasting our eyes with this one!!

[@bonnieisartist]

OMAGAD, NEW SONG BY KIAN!4!4!4

[@slowlydecomposingcorpse829]

This song appeared in my dreams last night

[@babssynth]

forte is still one of my favorite synths, love how you used both her new and r1 versions.

[@samdal420]

I keep coming back to this song ❤️

[@nanangiez]

really reminds me of my experience with systemhood.

[@calentinestrider8368]

aah imm not the only one who thought so, same here.

[@anameorsomething894]

Your work is always such a treat Kian!!

[@Chameleon0]

new song to listen for 8 hours straight

[@isaacthedestroyerofstuped7676]

My gut when I'm 7/8ths of the way through a DiGiorno Stuffed Crust Pizza at 3am

[@leemoo1665]

I really like this! It's such a nice back and forth! I hope you go on to make more amazing music

[@frutigerangel]

This is DELICIOUS OH MY GOD. I NEED TO INJECT THIS INTO MY BLOOD JTS SO GOOD!!

[@lowestpaper4186]

Feasting my ears

[@Anxious-creation]

Relatable

[@divine_ordainment]

WAIT I FEAR U SLAYED, POOKIE🤭‼️❤️

[@PigeonPrey]

I LOVE THIS SONG

[@samdal420]

Cant stop imagining a mouthwash animatic to this

[@criminaIdefense]

I missed the premiere…but this is insanely good…

[@whiteglovian]

certified banger

[@_Rhatsody]

Certified bop 🕺😤🕺

[@cringemonarch7438]

YAAAYYYYY YAAAAAAAAYYYY YAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY

[@ItsStarberryy]

THE LYRICS ARE SO GOOD WHAT FUSHWHEJFHJWAJQHHEJFJREJW

[@molis_bogu]

So fracking precious ❤

[@mourning_sponge]

real (i went through the exact same thing when i was 10-12 years old)

[@mono4946]

i like the updated pv

[@MissionSilo]

Nice song

[@QeuinVinyl]

I love kian! also, fed ex p

[@Kian31]

wow nice same name lol