Fentanyl Addict interview-Nikki

[@AlexusMusic]

When she said “this is going to bother a lot of people in my family but you know what, I don’t care, it’s about that time” I felt that !! Yes tell your story, YOU MATTER ! This is EXACTLY how I felt when I turned 20 I had, had enough !!!

[@rolandorzabal1955]

Exactly. When I put it out there that I was getting molested by my dad, I was immediately shunned. No one talks to me on that side anymore. And It is well with my soul

[@miapdx503]

Yes, I think when people abuse their children, they're not realizing that the child will be an adult one day, no longer powerless...and we have no obligation to give af about their feelings. Or their reputation. Or anything. They didn't give af you as a child. I remember when, after I survived my childhood, those people were ashamed every time they saw me, which was very rare.

[@divingduck1970]

@@miapdx503 The plan is for their children to die by their own hands before they wake up, either through drugs or alcohol or straight suicide. I'm a survivor. There's a reason why so many celebrities and their kids wind up like this. They're sacrifices.

[@whisperingwaters5710]

Yes! I felt this in my soul! I am right with her! It's time for us to speak our truth and no longer have anyone silence us anymore!

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@rolandorzabal1955 You were brave to tell your family you were abused. I'm happy to hear you're ok with being separated from a family who misjudged you. ❤️🤗

[@Cutter-jx3xj]

She talked about knowing but sweeping it under the rug. I saw stuff happen when I was growing up and I am 60 now and I still don't understand it. My parents were married 63 years before my dad passed and everyone thinks it is amazing but it was just because my mom knew stuff, chose to ignore it and stay where she was. Divorce was taboo back then and people just stuck with it and suffered thru. The only thing about that is your kids don't miss anything and then they live thru their lives repeating the same mistakes. I'm not blaming my folks, they did the best with the tools they had. Thank God I chose to break the cycle with my kids and love and protect them.

[@myeyeswentdeaf6213]

Good for you breaking that cycle. Where your parents religious? I ask cuz I’m Christian and I blame a lot of this on the church, not only because they have protected their own priests and pastors who where predators, but because, like you said, divorce was taboo, that was cause of religion. Also like this girl, the parents ignore it, I think that’s because everybody’s worried about looking like the perfect church going family to the neighbors and all the gossips in the church circles. I still believe in Jesus and all, but have left the church. Those things never happened to me, but I don’t like what the church has become.

[@joshua7233]

That's so good to hear! Well done for breaking the cycle, it's a tough thing to do.

[@candaceewell9582]

You have perfectly described what is wrong with all of us!!! 🖤

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@baublesanddolls I'm 71 and where I grew up divorce was extremely rare. My parents continuously fought but my mom didn't think about divorce until they'd been married 14 years with 6 kids. Women just didn't have a way out as they were financially dependent on their husbands. I remember looking at the 1 girl in my class whose parents were divorced and trying to figure out what was different about her.

[@holdenskitchen8015]

N is I to!$!,!!!!!!c B m 'g

[@rachelrothermel1549]

I know her out here in Kensington and somehow, even though she's so exhausted and deals with immense amount of mental turmoil-- somehow she still retains the capability to make others smile. She will do anything for anyone. If you have a problem, she goes into protection mode. She hates seeing good people out here getting taken advantage of-- this badass, yet nurturing, side of her comes out and she just wants to protect those who cannot protect themselves. I'm sorry you feel unloved, Nikki, but you are not unlovable. It breaks my heart that anyone could convince you of being difficult to love. You are not. Everything you've been through and your soul is still in tact-- it is still beautiful. Just like you are. We all have our flaws out here, of course, but Nikki is a good one. She deserves better. She deserves happiness. She deserves to feel worthy of all that is good and beautiful in the world-- and then she deserves to experience and live that. I know you can do it, Nikki! I know you can overcome this if you want to. I am so devastated for you for what you went through as a child, robbed of your innocence. You should have been protected like the precious little girl you were. You are still precious! I don't know if you will ever see this comment but, it all needed to be said. For all that she has endured, she somehow manages to find happiness throughout the day. I think she does hold a lot in-- she doesn't want to burden anyone. Please, "burden us," lean on us when you can. You don't have to be stoic and strong all the time. I know out here, you can't let them see you vulnerable. It saddens me to think that perhaps when you retire to your place at night that you feel a great deal of sadness. For what it is worth, I think you are tenacious, maternal, a survivor, a protector, entirely lovable, deserving of respect--- your story is heart-wrenching and incredible. You are superwoman, girl. I hope that a day comes when you want out of these trenches and I hope that from that point forward, you are able to rediscover yourself in the most wonderful, liberating, fulfilling ways possible. Do these interviews ever have followings where people can donate for help with housing or treatment, clothing/hygiene--- I'm not sure if there's any criteria for it but I know Nikki personally and I could be having the worst day and sitting with her for five minutes can transform my mood. If she was willing, I just wondered if there were any ways for people to reach out and provide support in various ways. We love you out here Nikki, but we would love it even more if you could make it out, chase your dreams, and pursue your true passions. It's never too late-- certainly not for her. This was very courageous of you-- I cried for you, I felt for you-- and I admire you for sharing your story so well. So authentically. People have betrayed you and left you feeling confused and lost. I'm sorry that the people who should've championed you ended up letting you down. Never think you are worth less because of anything you've endured. You are one-of-a-kind; treat yourself as such. You are worth the world. Thank you for sharing this powerful testimony. For humanizing addiction and the struggles we so often face; the suffering. Love you (because you are lovable! Always), Xoxo Rachel

[@deeturner6380]

😍😍😍

[@907livin]

🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@CC-sp9qr]

That was so beautiful Rachel. Thank you for taking the time to see all of that in her, thank you for writing this heartfelt message to her, and thank you for sharing it with us. God bless. 🙏💖

[@tmg5544]

Interested to see if this comment gets a response

[@loracorkhill2824]

Omg yes I just knew she was real.

[@ericagammaitoni9230]

This interview really stood out to me. She is...real. No dramatization, no hype, no bs. She is painfully open about herself, venerable, raw, and honest. She doesn't sugar coat a thing, doesn't pretend to be something she's not. My heart goes out to this woman.

[@BrianTaylor1645]

She's very articulate and communicates well. I wish her the best these interviews help me see things in a new light.

[@miapdx503]

Yes, Mark is doing amazing work here, giving voice to people that other's would in no way listen to. He's giving humanity to those treated as less than human. I too, have learned from this channel. Then there are those who don't get it. They come on here, all self righteous, blaming and judging... We have work to do 😏

[@wesleyAlan9179]

@@miapdx503 Same👍

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@miapdx503 Exactly! We have to remember where we came from so we can be compassionate towards others.

[@miapdx503]

@Blacksun Sigrune88 you don't really feel...that's called *no empathy.* In some ways, you're in worse shape than they are. But, good news...as long as you're above ground, you can still learn. You can mature.

[@miapdx503]

@Blacksun Sigrune88 got it. You have your prejudices. Most people do. Someone must have been really cold to you...I pray for your healing, for your heart.

[@YiannisANO1911]

She said “i know he loved me..” for her dad. Im currently reading the book Running on Empty which is about emotional neglect and the author, who is a psychologist, says that many clients say “i know they [parents] loved me”, but whats important is to FEEL that they love you.

[@sallyann985]

Spot on brother.

[@marylougeorge9890]

It is important to know you were/are loved by your parents. If you're unsure, as I was with my mother, it helped me to know her story, the life she grew up under.

[@MsAnneThrope]

This is one of the most remarkably honest and self aware interviews I’ve seen on this channel.

[@cakepudding3220]

What does self aware mean?

[@jadedmonk7001]

@Leah Lawrence Agreed! I hope Nikki can dig deep and grab hold of her bootstraps. She is realistic about her situation and seems willing to give it her best shot. Praying for her🙏

[@joshua7233]

Hmmm, I guess in a way you're right. Even though her parents obviously influenced her greatly, she did blame a lot of her current circumstances on her parents instead of reflecting inward (saying they're self-absorbed, etc etc). She has 6 kids and admitted that she is not raising them. She's just as self-absorbed and narcissistic as her parents. All addicts are during their addictions, and that's coming from me, an ex-addict.

[@brittaolson6550]

@@cakepudding3220 That she’s aware of what makes her tick

[@DK-mf8il]

@@joshua7233 exactly josh, she said i care more fo others than myself. I will do just about anything for anyone…. (Well maybe start with doing somthing for your kids maybe give every ounce of energy you have quitting drugs and being in there lives as much as you possibly can, im sorry for her pain but alot of her choices are more selfish than she will admit.)

[@Stevelives13]

She seemed to be more realistic and honest about her situation than most, I hope she can get help because I think of all the interviews I've seen she's the most likely to try and make the most of it. I think given the chance she could turn things around.

[@Prezzyknowz]

People see addicts and immediately think that they’re lesser in the mental department and emotionally dead. But these people ALWAYS have underlying demons. Most people do not know how to cope other than drugs.

[@jadedmonk7001]

@Steve 123 Yeah. My thoughts exactly. I liked Nikki for her openness and honesty. She was also realistic about her situation and future. Most importantly, Nikki still has a heart left and the mental capacity and drive to turn things around. I'm really rooting for her and hope there's a follow-up.❤

[@danusdragonfly6640]

I don't see her ever turning things around. Sad, but, true.

[@teresadorta3690]

@@danusdragonfly6640 yes I agree she admits how much she likes getting high.Its bad that a drug addict can get free housing a disabled person sits on waiting list for housing many many years and may die before they get it just makes me sick to my stomach.They chose to do the drugs and get hooked on them.Never trust a drug addict they manipulate people amongst other things they do for drugs and destruct alot of people's lives.

[@danusdragonfly6640]

@@teresadorta3690 I have known plenty of people who were able to give up their addictions. I wouldn't say that all addicts are bad, just like I wouldn't say all disabled people are good. Still, I do have to agree that housing should be easier for people with disabilities. Sadly there isn't enough fair housing for people all over the world.

[@saratheg]

Nikki reminds me so much of so many people I know, including myself. Sobriety is an extremely hard thing to do, and I'm at a point where a lot of trauma and emotions are popping back up and I have to deal with it. I knew that's why I used, and drank. If Nikki ever happens to see this, she is loved, and worthy of a better life.

[@rachelfaulk9171]

I am here with ya. Dealing with past trauma. Sobriety is so hard to keep. Stay strong honey. We got this

[@cynthiamarie2612]

I love ur comment Sara 🥰 u got this girl the mind is a scary thing but together we can be scarier than it 🙃😝

[@robertnalu3969]

That's weird you would comment that..

[@robertnalu3969]

I like it....... # my father was .......

[@kimrenee63]

I love this. Thank you for sharing.

[@RadRedhead222]

I need this woman to know that detox can help you with the sick. There’s even a place not too far from Kensington called Malvern that sedates you if it’s too bad. I know of a lot places near Kensington that actually want you to be as comfortable as possible. We can and do recover. It is possible to work through the trauma and abuse. It is possible to be happy and clean. I pray for her. Thank you, Mark!

[@brittaolson6550]

Yes! And Methadone/Suboxone programs. If the routine is hard to get down on the streets, there are treatments that will let you leave on MAT. I went to one. Unfortunately, it doesn’t offer it anymore. But there are others. Or some people get tapered off in treatment and then go right to the clinic when they leave, for help.

[@Reesa23]

I sure hope she has the courage to just say no more, and go. Because she's got a purpose. And it's not dying on Kensington. She just doesn't know it yet.

[@aprill2521]

​@@Reesa23 Yes ❤

[@ewika3868]

she prob knows that detoxing would help. she talked about hard it is to go to institutions and even ask for help for the sickness.

[@ViolenziaDomestica]

“Just because people do drugs, doesn’t make them bad people.” So true, Miss Nikki. I hope she can find love for herself someday. Rooting for you from Canada 🇨🇦

[@hollyhayes9640]

Hi! I'm also Canadian (Ottawa). 🇨🇦👍

[@ViolenziaDomestica]

@@hollyhayes9640 Hi neighbour! New Brunswick here

[@KILEE-4yt]

@@ViolenziaDomestica hello 🙋🏼‍♀️ there I'm in Toronto now but am from Fredericton NB. ✌🏻

[@BeeKay4444]

Hey from Alberta 🤘🏼🇨🇦

[@ladycats3810]

Respectfully listening to you from Montreal Quebec Canada

[@mariainesgarcia2767]

Nikki, so many pearls of wisdom you dropped!my heart goes out to you... That cognitive dissonance re. Your family's version of YOUR life and your life, it's a bitter pill to swallow. The replacement of affection with consumerism, the ruthless abuse gone unheeded.... And the lifestyle... But you are wise and you can still mother no matter how old they are. You have a whole life you can build now. But yes it's hell cleaning up...but the rewards are real and you have the strength . praying for you. Congratulations on breaking the nasty spell of family silence.

[@WritingErick]

"Its gotta be cold in the winter" "Freezing," something about the way she said it made me shiver.

[@bashmeesh]

"And did absolutely nothing about it." The silence after those words was deafening. I hope you can somehow heal. 🖤

[@shannonhuddleston4980]

She is the real deal she is very honest and she should be no matter who it bothers I pray you find your peace ❤️

[@tonifitz6831]

I really like this lady.. She's real... Realness counts for alot..

[@Leveltalks]

Absolutely

[@oneeks5908]

Especially these days. It’s refreshing to see. I wish her nothing but the best.

[@jonnybgreat6274]

Yes, she’s really a drug addicted prostitute that abandoned her children. Yet claims she’ll do anything for anyone.

[@galegrazutis964]

She is a junkie that chose drugs over the six kids she made!

[@susanfurlong2002]

YES, SHE IS VERY REAL, AND JUST SAYS HOW IT IS......PERIOD.

[@lf1496]

She has a profound energy. Wow, the look in her eyes when she said, "I don't love myself right now, how could I love anyone else?" What you see is the society makes people disconnected from the children they bring into the world. They pursue a life that LOOKS like a Norman Rockwell painting, without knowing how to really FEEL anything deeply, protecting the image over their children. I look at this woman and see someone who knew how to feel and was raised by people who lived in lies. That can make you feel crazy and want to numb yourself. I get it even though I have never taken drugs. I live in a country where whatever anyone really feels they say it and live it. I would be crazy if there was no emotional truth in my life. God Bless this woman. She's a beautiful profound human being that deserves better.

[@awesome_comment]

I really like this woman . She is honest and intelligent. I wish her the very best and hope that she does learn to love herself one day.

[@poppy8810]

Thank you for sharing your story , you made me realize that I need to tell my children that I love them more often , my daughter was molested by her foster brother and she is 16 now and I feel her pain , she is seeing a psychologist because of that , I pray to God she can heal from the trauma , I love her so so much and it kills me inside what she had to go through. I need to talk to her more about it and not hide the fact that she is hurt by her abuse. Thank you for making me realize how important communication is and how important to acknowledge her pain and struggles . You never did anything wrong, you are a very smart woman and have a lot to give to the world , please keep sharing your story it will help you heal , your kids need you more then you think , I pray you get better and get the help you deserve xxxxx

[@b1k2q34]

Why was your daughter in foster care?

[@LostHistory_CurrentEvents]

@@b1k2q34 i was thinking maybe she was a foster parent🤷🏽‍♀️

[@alisha5358]

I love her!!! Man that addiction life grabs you and won't let you go. I was stu k in that darkness for so long. CpS took my kids and I was fortunate enough to get clean and get custody back. I've been clean 6 years. I know the darkness she know. She will be in my prayers. You can do it sister!

[@cindyfitzgerald4500]

Congratulations Alisha!

[@spiderlegs50]

Congratulations on Your 6 Years of Sobriety !!!!

[@jessicacoe241]

It’s interesting that she didn’t get into hard drugs until her kids moved out; I think this says a lot about her as a person. I feel like people like her don’t have a chance almost right from birth. It makes me so incredibly grateful for my own life and incredibly sad for people like Nikki. Thank you for letting these people tell their stories.

[@heatherthunderhawk485]

Your a beautiful spirit and an empath. That is why your have been treated so harshly. This world is afraid of strong loving women like yourself. Don't let them take your life. You are courage's for speaking truth and here to provide strength to those of us who stand in truth. Thank You wonderful woman and thank you sir for giving people the chance to voice their journey

[@melb9766]

I am binge watching your videos after discovering your channel and I have to say, I am so impressed by your work. All the people you interview are so real to me, it is such an experience to hear what they choose to share of their lives. So many broken lives, the victims as well as the perpetrators, when it's not just both of it. It hurts and it provides healing at the same time. It makes me wanna be a more humane being. Thank you so much for all of it.

[@shannongreer6194]

I’m doing the same

[@rnoelle1218]

I know Nikki, She is absolutely precious and one of the most genuine people you'll ever meet. She is even stronger in real life then she even appears on this interview. She deserves so much happiness & I hope that's what her future holds. 💜you Nikki

[@KizzyXTrillest]

I really appreciate you Mark for exploring and interviewing in different places to give everyone a chance to tell their story on your channel ! I am from Philadelphia and never go to the Kensington area because of stigmas or the danger in that area. There is violence, crime, drugs, and so much more all over Philadelphia but that neighborhood Kensington beach is known for the most chaos. From your videos interviewing some of the people living there has opened my eyes and made me realize that everyone is the same and drugs does not define a person. Thank you

[@kirstybonnot2562]

Poor lady & her twin brother. Sending you lots of love and I hope you find a light in your life. ❤️

[@whisperingwaters5710]

My heart goes out to her. I resonate with her story. I was molested at the age of 6 by my first cousin who was much older in high school. After it happened, I started having nightmares and told a friend at school and told my parents. They didn't believe me and did nothing just put their heads in the sand . It lasted for years, and I acted out tremendously and crying for help. I had no emotional support. The way my parents showed love was also buying me things. My mother did the best that she knew how, I don't know what true Mothers love feels like. My mother isn't a affectionate person and barely said that she loved me. My fathers love was the action that I needed, but also was in great pain because he would beat me with a belt and give me the silent treatment as punishment. I am the oldest out of four, and the love and attention was more towards my other siblings. I am 36 today, and I still crave the love that I wish that I had with my parents. I have never felt seen or heard. Gaslighted and made fun of for their own entertainment and enjoyment in front of family. Neglected in some ways. My mental health declined and Depression and suicidal ideation set in at the age of 16. PTSD and anxiety filled within me. Thank you for sharing your story. With our tests in life gives us our greatest testimony.

[@echase416]

re: intergenerational trauma. Remember that a lot of families ‘don’t want to hear the truth’. It doesn’t make the truth *any less true*… After surviving what you have your the kind of person who makes the best crisis or shelter worker. Lived experience and empathy.

[@joyousenoful]

I’m sorry for what you’ve gone through

[@Bachconcertos]

U had abusive parents like most people.

[@augustinedebosson9343]

Ok it's a good moment for you to take a psychologist help.... For the trauma there is EMDR therapy it's quickly and that could help you to find a new happyness and restart your life.... You'll can find many informations by internet... Don't loose your time again...if that can save one, that can save the humanity...

[@marylougeorge9890]

Oh, honey, I'm sorry. I understand. My childhood was similar. Fortunately, I was blessed with friends who loved and appreciated me for who I am or I would have been totally lost. Hang in there. Your parents mistreated you! You are Worthy of love and praise.❤️❤️❤️

[@frothe42]

She hit the nail on the head; I don't love myself how can I love someone else. A shame that she dislikes herself so much that she turns to chemicals. Terrible.

[@SammysMysASMR]

Nikki you must be a godsend to people around you. Not that love/care for others should come at your expense, nor do I wish it for you, but you are one helluva sharp seemingly caring woman. Whether you know it or not you exude strength and if and when you’re ready I believe you can really effect change…hopefully with you first, for you ❤️

[@marylougeorge9890]

😊👍❤️

[@appleyardjr267]

No offense to her but just being real but I highly doubt she's godsent to ppl around her. She's a drug addict and with that comes other mental health issues and all kinds of stuff. It's probably hard being around her cause it's most likely "always something". Being that far into addiction ur very mentally unstable. She may have a good heart but more than likely doesn't have good actions. I do hope she can get it together and get clean cause being in that position is the worse feeling ever amd nothing but pain and misery. I know cause I was an opiod addict myself and other drugs and am a year and 3 months clean

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@appleyardjr267 Congratulations on your sobriety.😊👏👏👏

[@appleyardjr267]

@@marylougeorge9890 thank you 😊

[@bozekblack]

So well said.

[@froandcara]

Ooh, I like her. She’s smart, has a beautiful personality, and a good person. And she’s been through it. I hope she stops waiting for others to love her and remembers how amazing she is and loves herself. Some how you can provide that for yourself even if you have to fake it and tell yourself it like you’re another person. Say it every day. Tell yourself the things your parents should have- you are strong, loved, protected, worthy, and good.

[@jadeharper4623]

Time after time, Mark asks this curveball question “Have you ever been in love before?” and 90% of the time, I know I can expect a smile, smirk or giggle from the interviewee. So cute, so pure. Don’t stop asking them that question Mark, we love the reactions! Lol

[@jadeharper4623]

@@baublesanddolls some of them may not, but it’s almost always a layer of innocence in that initial smile or giggle. Like when you ask a toddler “is there someone you like at school?” Whatever their answer is, is prefaced with a smile of the sorts.

[@ayimgatica4794]

You can really feel the pain she carries. She seems like a really good hearted person that deserves so much more than where she’s at. When she said that she’s scared of dying before she gets better.. that hit hard. I really hope she gets out of that lifestyle and gets to enjoy everything that life has to offer 🙏🏼

[@workwithwendy5962]

Absolutely love your work Mark and Nikki seemed like a sweet, genuine soul. Very intellectual and speaks from the heart. Wish she didn't struggle with where she ended up and it today...

[@ravenblue7805]

I SO hope Nikki uses that roof over her head as motivation to clean herself up. I spent 5 years living on the streets and when I was presented with a home I experienced *joy* for the first time in my life (I was 18 at that time). But having said that, I was resilient and young, and I can only imagine what it’s like for women like Nikki....at her age. I’m 60 now and I know I couldn’t survive the streets now. There’s no doubt in my mind that Nikki’s formidable and I hope she knows it and uses it to create stability and peace for herself....

[@unitedstatesdale]

Congratulations for beating addiction

[@brandonhenman1544]

Mark what you do is invaluable I wish I could find away to do the same for the dirt underbelly of Australian culture that is hidden under a blanket of auzzy attitude “out of sight out of mind “ your platform is an amazing educational platform I wish I was exposed to this sort of reality before I took the path I chose

[@aliciamadrid8524]

It’s every where. It’s sexual abuse in homes. It’s every where

[@Progenitor1979]

Same for South Africa. If you ever have a chance to come to Durban I will be able to introduce you to the underbelly. It's all the same shit I guess (intergenerational trauma) but with interesting cross cultural dynamics. Hit me up, there's work to do!

[@sadhu7191]

I thinks that is for everyone one. Reber Brazil Olympic when they had country split in poor and rich. Aldi is for poor publix is for rich. I could go on and on

[@marylougeorge9890]

@@sadhu7191 😢💔

[@SomethingFunny454]

He makes money exploiting suffering people. Disgusting.

[@cindywhedbee1713]

I like that she is open and admitted to her shortcomings. I wish I could comfort her as she is in a lifetime of pain. Being an addict is a disease. I’ve learned that the hard way. Mark, what you do gives me a lot of self reflection. Thank you’

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@SkittleMcPhee23]

Love this comment.🥺🖤

[@oceanai1975]

Nikki, I am so sorry for everything you've been through and for the deep pain you carry. Thank you for sharing your story and for being so real, honest and vulnerable. I hope your life begins to change once you move into your new home. It's your safe space. Love from Toronto, Canada🤗🥰😍

[@494ava]

Nikki is in tremendous pain and her being on drugs is her way of disappearing. She sees doom and has settled for the bear minimum in life. The odds of her getting clean and surviving this lifestyle are small. It’s hard to watch a good person deal with trauma in this fashion. People need to start seeing what’s going on behind closed doors and save these kids that grow up to be adults like this. You can tell that these drugs age a person and they lose teeth,weight and glowing skin which turns dull and infected. Nikki I pray for you and send well wishes for a day that your life changes for all the goodness and joy that your broken heart can absorb. Blessings prayers and hope I send to you!!🙏🏽🫶🏽❤️I pray for you to enjoy the many sunny ☀️ days ahead and leave that darkness for the devil.

[@emm2937]

So well said! ♥️♥️♥️

[@494ava]

@@emm2937 thank you 🙏🏽

[@emm2937]

@@494ava 🫶😍

[@kellykelly9521]

Her best bet is to rehabilitate and remove herself from that environment, old habits, and friends/acquaintances that are users. Change lifestyle if she is ready. It depends on her and her personal rock bottom.

[@siriuslili]

❤️

[@PaulH_1972]

This poor woman is in desperate need of professional help before it’s too late 🙏🏻

[@javanesemystic]

Nikki I hope you start loving yourself & take care of yourself more than you take care of others. 🤍🤍 Thank you Mark 🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@megscott222]

This beautiful lady is full of so much pain and also strength. It's scary to see what can happen when parents don't pay attention. I pray that she finds her way to a safe life very soon. Edit.... congrats on your housing. You're almost out of this phase and I know that with help, you can do it 💖from Canada

[@misterolivista]

I appreciate her honesty and realistic view of her life: I wish her well!

[@gembrain7095]

Thank you for sharing your story Nikki. Every time I listen to someone’s story on this channel it reaffirms to me the importance of loving my children unconditionally, being emotionally available to them, and protecting their innocence. If we could all do this the world would be a better place.

[@joyousenoful]

Nikki, you’re a miracle to be as kind, generous, and beautiful as you are for everything you went through. Please try to leave this place behind and get clean. You deserve so much more.

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@Marie-mo9id]

@9:54 I could talk to Nikki about that too! My father started dating the week after my mother's funeral. I wish Nikki the best, she sounds like a good person, she's just had a really rough life.

[@debbiemohekey1509]

@@baublesanddolls Her parents would like you

[@mayaluna11]

Nikki's pain is obvious. So is her intelligence and huge heart. I hope an pray she finds the right combination of support and strength to recover.

[@Discardedvoices]

I loved her and this interview. I hope she finds life on the other side of addiction. She is so deserving ❤️

[@lapetitevenus]

I really like you Nikki, down to earth, honest, and truthful. As a fellow woman I commend you, your spirit and your strength.

[@southernsoulfarm]

She is such a sweet soul and beautiful woman. I pray she gets clean soon ❤️🙏

[@othersideofthedoor]

Nikki, you are an extremely strong woman. i see the potential in you, you’re very well spoken and it’s clear you have a huge heart. i hope the future holds nothing but blessings for you. stay strong, know that you are loved.♥️

[@powderandpaint14]

It's very likely that her older brothers had been molested by someone else. This is why things have to be spoken about and dealt with.

[@poppy8810]

You are absolutely right , something happened to him to spark the abuse of his siblings

[@saramilena.]

My older brother did the same thing to me and my nephew (not his daughter), and the last year i ended up in a hospital because of an overdose and the psychologist told me me that maybe my brother did that because someone did the same to him,I'VE NEVER THOUGHT THAT BEFORE, i can't pull my head around it yet........................

[@powderandpaint14]

@@saramilena. children displaying abusive behaviours towards other children is a big red flag that they have been abused.

[@heatherkandt]

I stoped fentanyl, I was given blues was told they we real… I’ve had 23 major surgeries, chronic health issues. I work a very hard physical and mentally job and commute 2 hours one day.. I have a farm and ride and train horses as well. I think I am so used to being miserable that detox was just another shitty couple days. I always had restless legs, insomnia and anxiety, and chronic complex PTSD and depression. .. it can be done. I did it cold turkey. No help, just cut back every day until I was one barely anything then went to every other day to nothing.

[@myeyeswentdeaf6213]

That’s the right way, but the problem is a lot of addicts, such as myself, have problems with self control. I’ve tried to wean down a few times on my own but then I’ll get money and buy and do as much as I can handle.

[@heatherkandt]

@@myeyeswentdeaf6213 ya I always found if I had a blue around or even half one I wouldn’t panic or worry.. but if I had nothing I would loose it..

[@heatherkandt]

@@baublesanddolls smoked 50 blues a day for 2 years…

[@heatherkandt]

On opioids over 17 years .. so ya I was addicted. I got sick as fuck… mind over matter…I beat cancer twice also, and had a heart surgery at 27… crave it everyday. I smoked the fent powder I shot IV… for you to say somebody isn’t addicted is so insane, I know ppl that were addicted short periods months and can’t get off. Your brain is addicted after 3 continues days of opioid use.

[@heatherkandt]

@@baublesanddolls I’ll take dope sick over cancer any day… it sucked but there’s much worse. It sucks for sure, but I most definitely was .. I used all day, and would get sick after 2 hours if I didn’t use.

[@lisaivory2141]

Life is hard no matter what you do… absolutely on of your best picks for interviewing! I loved her!

[@MOONSLIFE36]

Not the addicted part but the start of this hits home personally. My sister SA me when i was very very young. My parents knew a lot that happened to me. We learned not to talk about anything. Suck it up sweep it under the rug. My mother knew I was Graped at 13years old and locked me in a institution for adults. You can imagine what happened in a male /female ward. Lost my baby Alice in my 2 trimester we don't talk about it. My whole life is full of trauma and im 35years old. Its so sad how family can mess you up. They looked the other way when i used self harm to cope. They put me on very strong psych meds in the hospital for schizophrenia I did not have. My family knew why I was acting out and they wouldn't tell the doctors. That same drug I was on from a very young age for many years caused me to have a brain aneurysm and brain damage. I am in chronic pain I believe from holding in all my sadness. Sorry for the novel. I cant believe I just finally told someone. Thank you for listening ❤

[@Leveltalks]

Hi Nikki, You have a true genuineness I recognized instantly! Stay strong!🌺🌷🌸

[@benbrewer6000]

I was going into this video with the normal mindset I have but I was not expecting Nikki to hit so close to home this time, it is truly terrifying how common this cycle of broken homes turning out broken children is

[@LightBoneTarot]

I have watched so many of Marks interviews and I am always amazed and even intrigued by how articulate and smart his guests are. It is never what I would expect. I wonder where they would be if their lives took a differnt turn or if the abuse never happened... It's fascinating how together and sharp Nikki is. I don't know what it would take for her to get clean but I beiive she has the mind to do it.

[@kit2130]

Quiet & pensive questions today. The ones that hit home & get right to the point. Very in tune & listening.

[@tropics8407]

Empathy Mark. Thank you 🙏 You were so brave at six years old Nikki. You got a break…housing 🙌 For yourself now, not for anyone else, I hope you can be brave again…

[@chimichanga87]

This is such a good person who is stuck in her situation.

[@anthonylandolfi1891]

nikki is such a good hearted lady , i can see so much potental in her ,she doesnt want this life , if the drugs wernt involved with her i can fully see her somewhere serving such great deeds

[@janishahoward6276]

From my personal experience as a recovering addict, she won't quit until she doesn't like the drugs anymore, when getting high stops being fun and you're literally getting high to be well, that's when the tables start turning , well, that's when it changed for me at least. Everyone's story isn't the same yet they're all always so similar, and sounds like she is taking advantage of the help and housing she is gett, I feel if she has no plans in getting clean soon, then someone who is wanting treatment now should be in her spot.

[@janishahoward6276]

In my small town in Kentucky, I see on the daily these people that abuse treatment as a way to get out of trouble, when they've no intention on staying clean, mean while others are dying to get into treatment and can't🤬

[@RodDangerKimble]

Everyone is a human being with their own stories and reasons and faults. Everyone deserves housing and basic necessities. The solution is not "be more selective," it's "create more housing."

[@thematriarchy2075]

@@RodDangerKimble Well said

[@janishahoward6276]

@@RodDangerKimble that's understandable, but at the same time she is clearly saying she has no intention of getting clean, and that she basically said she was going to to get the housing, so you're telling me that she deserves to be housed with no Intentions of getting clean, while there's probably 100's if people that want to get clean but can't get in because there's someone taking that spot, a person that clearly in her own words "loves the drugs too much still" to get clean? That's a part of what's wrong with this country, people abusing help that they really don't want, that others are dying to get. That's like winning a race, that you didn't even participate in or cheated to win.

[@thundersweetiex2912]

@@janishahoward6276 yes, she does deserve to have a roof over her head. Everybody does. And the fact that a lot don't says more about the society we live in than anything else

[@outback5thgate5658]

She is such an honest beautiful person. She could help a lot people. Learn to be honest with themselves. I hope She makes it. God bless her.

[@rainrabbit9209]

Mark, always heart wrenching. Thank you for creating a place to share, hear and feel. I wish I had a magic eraser to remove such pain.

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

*I just finished my 2nd Interview mark. It is not the same format as yours, but I didn't want to copy off of u, thanks for the inspiration*

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

@@davide.b8027 yeah sorry it was my 2nd channel, hold on a min

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

@@davide.b8027 kzbin.info/www/bejne/iXnTdpafaNucfs0

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

thanks

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

@@davide.b8027 yes we r, I have watched all his interviews when he was interviewed like on no jumper and other channels.

[@GRUBB-MUDD]

@@davide.b8027 ohh yeah he has been interviewed on the koncrete podcast and no jumper, he also was interviewed walking down skid row by some guy named Alex I think. just use his channel name in search

[@vo1134]

THIS IS THE BEST vid from SWU I have seen yet. What I mean by that is the way Mark seemed to press some good questions. Great interview and Great story! 💕

[@DEBRACRANFORD]

I like her. She is very self aware. When he asked if she was lonely she started rocking while answering him. That is unconscious self soothing

[@bryangraham3072]

Way to go Nikki, that was very brave that took some guts, I hope you felt a little lighter having let that out. I'm really sorry that happened to you and your siblings. I hope you find some peace someday Nokki.

[@rockpadstudios]

6 years old - this is so heart breaking

[@sophialynn1798]

if i had to use one word to describe nikki based on this interview it just seems like shes exhausted. the adults in her childhood failed her. she seems like she is such a kindhearted person and a sweet lady. she just looks so out of it. i really hope she gets the help that she needs.

[@tugboatteal7495]

Her story is all too familiar It's just that in Kensington it's so ugly hardcore and evil This poor lady has learned not to have any hope I am truly sad

[@Boddissatva]

I see so much potential in this woman. She’s smart intuitive and real. Caught in a cycle of abuse. Pray for healing to begin.

[@vinpen5662]

Bless you Nikki, you have had so much to deal with even from just a little girl. You are so brave and so strong to be functioning as well as you do. You do not deserve any of this, I’m so sorry. You are a precious being with a very kind countenance. I pray that all you have lost will be returned to you in kindness, love, health and wonderful time with your children.

[@marylougeorge9890]

Thank you for your interview, Nikki. I appreciate your honesty and willingness to tell your story. I'm sorry about you and your brother's childhoods. I'm sorry about your friend's horrible death.😢💔 I'm glad you have housing. I'm praying for you and your loved ones.🙏❤️

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@mississippiapple1078]

I wish the best for her. She has lots of wisdom that can help others

[@laurenj1052]

Hearing she has housing just made me so happy for her!!❤

[@sunray8136]

Many think drug addicts are weak people but this woman has a deep strength within her. I hope she sees that. Life is unfair to so many.

[@afterthestorm221]

As adults we have responsibility to children who find their safety in us. If they choose to tell us something shocking or unbelievable please believe them and act on it, they're telling you for a reason. 💚

[@TEM14411]

Amen.

[@chuckfriedlein2720]

I believe that all child molesters should be locked up for life so they can never hurt another person again just look at these interviews and you can see how much damage child molesters actually do it's terrifying

[@jackierussell1882]

Watching these interviews with real people....my first thought is "there but for the grace of God go I ".....having been abused in every way & neglected by my "mother"....I can only send much love & respect....

[@diegonaranjo2425]

Stay strong Nikki! Getting your housing is an important step. You seem to understand what your problem is, I hope you can get your way out of it.

[@imaloserdude7227]

"Life is hard..." Wise words that youngsters need to hear.

[@secretpal6039]

I love you, Nikki. Sending you a big hug. So sorry you’ve had to deal with all you’ve had to deal with.

[@lrho6047]

Nikki - you are beautiful, empathetic and a wonderful communicator. I hope you are able to be apart of your grandkids lives. Sometimes that is a life giving second chance ❤️

[@ryangermann95]

Sibling abuse is real,and rarely talked about. I feel for her, my parents also ignored it. It really f_ed up my entire life.

[@iluvmusic444]

i see a lot of light in this beautiful lady, and I hope and pray she gets the help she needs. praying for you, dear! ❤️

[@janienehinds8247]

This lady is remarkably honest and direct. She doesn’t hide behind appearing overly confident or proud or offer a litany of excuses for her life choices as many try to do when being interviewed. She seems truly honest in expressing her view about both the negative experiences outside of her control (ie sexual abuse) and the missteps and poor choices that she made which brought her to this place and time. No false bravado, no excuses, just facts as she quietly takes responsibility for her life as it is now. There is honor and courage in her assessment of her life and we could all learn so much from her. I know I can and I hope I will.

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@lisasargent2841]

I LOVE THIS BEAUTIFUL SOUL SISTER.

[@kgreene460]

Thank you, Nikki! I am also really glad that you got housing. Please take care of yourself, your children need you.

[@charissekauhn3130]

Nikki I hope that you can seek some help for your addiction as I did two years ago at the age of 46. Know that you are worth it and its never too late. You can start over with Gods help. Use the housing to your advantage and get off the streets of Kensington. Build a new life for yourself at this time. I would love to hear that you went to a recovery program and are doing well. If I did it, you surely can and Ill be praying for you.

[@lisamarie5882]

Tammy - I feel like you would be such an amazing grandma. I hope you get better soon and can focus on the happier side of life. There’s so much more out there.

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@ChimpMagic]

thank you for coming to kensington and sharing these stories

[@brendaraekidd9428]

Nikki says "I don't love myself right now, so I can't love someone else"... thats the truth of addiction and the chaos that brings. God Bless Nikki x

[@elainew2230]

It's so sad to see how an abusive childhood leads to drugs that ruins a whole life. I don't know what the answer is, but I hope Nikki finds it.

[@aocchan]

She's so sweet. I hope she can spend more time with her children soon.

[@mistierr]

Nikki, I think you deserve the world and I am so, so sorry you never got it. You are so resilient. Strong. Intelligent. You are worth so much. I hope you can find peace, both within yourself and in the world around you. I hope your housing treats you well and can bring you comfort.

[@JohnSmith-wn4rt]

I hope everything works out for you. You are very sweet and I hope your okay. I hope one day you get things back on track and get clean.

[@robynmawer769]

I'm completely Heartbroken for her..I really Wish I had the means to Help her!! I Feel her Pain..I may have chosen a different path, but I Feel her!!

[@yayaserenity2397]

Prayers go out to Nikki. Mark please do an update.

[@abbypeck136]

This woman is incredibly bright. I so badly want her to get help, get clean, and be in the space to help others do the same. She has so much to give. But I know how hard it is.

[@im2good4u2.2]

Thank you because this is my brothers mom (Edited real mom)