Mark i just got 8 years clean yesterday. Your videos have done ALOT to keep me clean. They have served as a reminder and a warning, of the madness that comes with severe addiction.
@jackiemarsh247010 ай бұрын
Congradulations my Friend!!
@Dwh196010 ай бұрын
Congratulations 🎉
@miketan885710 ай бұрын
Congratulations!
@leneo173110 ай бұрын
That's absolutely amazing! Very few people have done what you did. Isn't it 98 out of 100 who relapse? The odds are so against people who are addicted to drugs, just those odds alone have to be such a demotivating factor. Knowing that it's almost impossible before you try and get clean is probably the reason why many don't even try. It's a mental challenge like no other. I'm not trying to invade your privacy but I'm just curious to know what you feel like after 8 years. Are you still struggling on a daily basis? Or has it now become the new you to be clean? I know many are doing good on a daily basis because they have school, work, maybe a partner, children or other things that take the focus away from the craving and the thoughts. It's when these regular days are disturbed that people can get in trouble. I know very many addicts struggle so much during holidays, especially at Christmas, Easter and also during the summer time. And when people experience traumatic events like illness, loss, or other personal demanding events. Is it like that for you, too? If you don't want to answer, I totally respect that. I just want to learn about addiction and mental health issues as, much as I can. Have a great day! Keep doing what you do because it's obviously works! Stay strong and courageous! Love from Norway.
@lisahamrick406110 ай бұрын
Congratulations! That's an awesome achievement!
@mysticunicorn433210 ай бұрын
That comment at the very end. " Sorry if it doesn't make sense" just that glimpse of insecurity made my heart soften for him.
@drpkckgrrl10 ай бұрын
Me too
@BooBoosPalace10 ай бұрын
Mine, too ❤ 😔
@goldenfarms10 ай бұрын
“I’m only 38 and have a lot of life left to live” he’s digging his own grave and is convincing himself it’s not actually his.
@wrath23110 ай бұрын
Im 38 and still live a life of regret.
@bedford438310 ай бұрын
@@wrath231 The Rear-View mirror is small and shows what is behind us. It is a reflection of the past and cannot be changed. It is somewhat important because to know where we are going, we must know where we are coming from. The windscreen is large and in front of us. It projects our future and can be changed. It is most important because we can choose where we want to go and the windscreen projects our destiny.
@Darkest_Soul_18710 ай бұрын
His kidneys are probably shutting down. He doesn't have as much time as he thinks
@GottSmoke10 ай бұрын
@@bedford4383 I love that, thank you!
@fifilamoore171810 ай бұрын
@@bedford4383❤❤ That’s a great analogy . I love this 😊
@Kree90110 ай бұрын
Johnny warned us about the fent-bent syndrome, he talked abt it hurting the kidneys, causing the victim to "curl over" uncontrollably
@carlitasway247710 ай бұрын
I never heard of fentanyl syndrome
@wesleyAlan917910 ай бұрын
Yep, he sure did, I remember that shit
@wesleyAlan917910 ай бұрын
@@carlitasway2477 It's not official, it's just a term.
@davechristian754310 ай бұрын
@@carlitasway2477 bc it dosnt exist 'iHard drugs in general will make your bend downward somewhat its just wat drugs do to the human body.
@nicksterp280510 ай бұрын
Omg shit. That's awful. Kidney pain is horrible when you're sober. Hope you find recovery Tony. Don't give up hope. You seem like a great guy
@Nicolelynn121710 ай бұрын
I watch these and see these people started at 10-15 years old. I have a 13 year old. It scares the shit out of me. I talked to him recently about when he’s out playing with his friends. I tell him if anyone offers you anything you say no. If your friends want to buy drugs you immediately leave or call me. His response was Omg Mom we don’t even know where you buy drugs at or have any money to buy even Arizona Teas. I wouldn’t even know what kind of drugs do you ask for. We just focus on our basketball skills and breaking ankles. I Pray it stays this way! It’s terrifying raising kids today.
@robinbuday9 ай бұрын
It’s always been this way
@alfonzo78229 ай бұрын
It's scary but we got to just warn the kids and hope they listen.
@artsynahnah26589 ай бұрын
Then don't put them in public school where they will be indoctrinated
@Clerpy9 ай бұрын
Tbh I'm not sure if this is the right advice. I'm not going to tell you how to raise you child, so if you plan to raise them with a zero tolerance approach towards drugs, where they should never touch any drug under any circumstance, thats your prerogative. But coming from someone who fought long and hard to escape the throes of addiction (opiates specifically), I think educating your child on drugs, familiarizing them with harm reduction principles, and making them feel comfortable and unafraid of discussing substances with you, will increase the likelihood of them avoiding dangerous drugs altogether. Rather than being told to stay away from any and all drugs, I wish I would have been educated on the nuances and properties of each drug and taught what makes some drugs like psychedelics for example (relatively safe if used responsibly in a safe environment) different than opiates or meth for example. In my personal opinion, I think you'll be better off if your child feels comfortable discussing their and their friends attitudes towards drugs with you and seeking your guidance if they decide to use them (or if their friends do). That way they don't equate smoking pot with doing cocaine or heroin and develop a false sense of equality between them ("well we already smoked weed, why not try cocaine, it's just as bad"). Personally, I try to foster an environment where my child will feel comfortable telling me if they are curious about trying a drug so I can either provide a safe setting and correct knowledge about it if It's something that's relatively safe OR dissuade them from using something that's not safe at all (i.e. fentanyl, meth, etc). Plenty of people are able to recreationally use substances like lsd, mdma, cannabis, and even cocaine once in a while, satisfy their curiosity about it, then leave it alone after a while, never suffering any consequences as a result. I think the key thing that allows that is being educated about safety and feeling comfortable expressing their curiosities with someone who may be more experienced. That's just my observation as someone who has been around the block a few times
@Hermit_mouse10 ай бұрын
Lost in a fentanyl dream without knowing he’s lost or even dreaming
@BespokeCarpentry10 ай бұрын
Man, he's just not there. He's somewhere else, he's a different person than he once was. Once people get to this point, even if they can go into recovery and succeed, the damage is done. People like him are like lost souls, wondering the streets looking for purpose, but never finding it, never being satisfied, or comfortable. Just complete misery.
@abigailrand10 ай бұрын
they are all probably convinced they don’t have one so instead they numb themselves to distract themselves from their life situation. it’s like watching a movie already knowing the ending. i feel for them and wish i could just tell them to conquer their thoughts :(
@crustinagohard904910 ай бұрын
That's not true
@Daniea310 ай бұрын
There's a good possibility that tx for his underlying conditions would help him out. He likely has a schizo type condition and/or brain injury. It isn't just intoxication.
@notdan10 ай бұрын
@@Daniea3 Thank you for bringing some sense to these comments. His opiate use has very little to do with his dissociative episodes, nor his likely severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder symptoms that are causing him to hunch over. There's a possibility he actually also has back pain, but all of this could be solved with GOOD healthcare. A good neurologist could help identify his back issues, a GOOD psychologist would work with a GOOD psychiatrist and develop a wholistic treatment program to give him a new lease on life. But this will never happen in the USA, because the word "good" does not exist in a vast majority of the Healthcare system Americans pay so much for. This man seems humble, kind, and warm.. yet he'll likely die soon because nobody gives a single f anymore. The USA is so horrible with it's "Pray For Pain™" and "F*ck You, Pay Me Healthcare System™" that I am unsure why the citizens haven't revolted, other than they are maybe just too distracted, weak and sick to organize a proper revolt to have proper healthcare.
@tonyhoffman33099 ай бұрын
Drug induced psychosis and schizophrenia is common
@lojoinpoho10 ай бұрын
His scrambled thoughts are hard for me to watch. I hope he finds his way back. ❤
@Nav0nod10 ай бұрын
Man hes in and out of reality , he starts to make sense then just goes off trail
@truefact84410 ай бұрын
When he gets it to all make sense, he has scanned you. You will start following his hypnosis walk.
@pinkythechihuahua315610 ай бұрын
I couldn't understand a word he was saying.1
@them1keG10 ай бұрын
That isnt entirely because of a mental disability or defeciency. This dude hasnt slept in DAYS. The way he starts to answer and then forgets what hes talking about, or trails off and says something like "so yeah..." are both SUPER common for people who (usually) iv meth and have been on a multi day bender. Even when smoking it, most people fall asleep way before theyve been up this long.
@jasonolinger758510 ай бұрын
your profile name is a oxy moron, should be "falsefact" @@truefact844
@beckyadams112810 ай бұрын
@pinky..... I had that same issue, I even slowed down the playback speed. He was talking somewhat softer than my ears can hear and he was also talking to fast for me to grasp every word 🥺😕
@karenfryberger426010 ай бұрын
Speaking of scanning...I think Tony needs x-rays and/or an MRI. He could be suffering from scoliosis, a slipped disc, osteoarthritis, a tumor pressing on his spine, a recent or previous spinal injury...there are many medical conditions that cause spine curvature disorders. Seems like more that fentanyl is involved. A thought on his use of the word scan is he might be dsylexic; seems like he first used the word in regards to following written words on a page, underlining some, perhaps as a tool to help "scan" sentences when trying to read. Of course later in the interview things get awfully complicated, yet I still get the sense that he is using language to the best of his abilities to describe what he is experiencing. He's a gentle person in a lot of pain. I hope he accepts any help available to him to get better.
@thematriarchy207510 ай бұрын
I assume you saw my comment? Do you think this is the same man as Garrett? Age is the same and the place they grew up in is the same. I know they don't seem to look alike a lot, but Garrett was interviewed years ago, so who knows what he could look like now.
@karenfryberger426010 ай бұрын
@@thematriarchy2075 I did see your dialogue with another commenter, and took a quick glance at Garrett's photo (interview from 3 years ago). I could see a similar look, but I'd want to listen to that interview to get a better feel for whether there is a possibility of Tony and Garrett being the same person. Will do that later. Just skimmed through the comments again and see you've reached out to Mark for clarification. TBD...
@thematriarchy207510 ай бұрын
I didn't hear back yet, but i am curious what you think. 3 years is a long time on the streets @@karenfryberger4260
@BelindaM4410 ай бұрын
Probably Osteomyelitis from starting drugs at such a young age.❤🙏
@karenfryberger426010 ай бұрын
@@thematriarchy2075 Okay. I just watched / listened to Garrett's interview, then came back to this one, then went back and forth in short bursts. And...I'm undecided. You're right about age and Half Moon Bay being where they both grew up.They are both redheads and their voices sound similar; both mention an alcoholic father. And yet, it's noteworthy that in Garrett's interview, he talks about surfing having been his passion; Tony mentions a lot of sports he used to be into, but no word of surfing. Garrett says he graduated high school; Tony says he dropped out. Garrett says his parents divorced when he was about 5 yrs old; Tony says they "separated" when he was 15. Garrett doesn't mention any siblings; Tony says he has 3 sisters and a brother. Garrett speaks about his surgery for scoliosis and how it led to getting addicted to opiates; Tony doesn't mention any surgery and talks about weed being the beginning of his drug usage. Where or what is the truth? There are a lot of differences in their stories, but it's hard to ignore the basics of age, hometown, and resemblance. Oy vey.
@OkcBilly10 ай бұрын
I’m 23 addicted to fentanyl and by looking at me you’d have no idea I do drugs . Shit is no joke and is everywhere . Hopefully going to rehab this week
@thematriarchy207510 ай бұрын
Please do! ❤
@simple.kelsieandshelleysho504110 ай бұрын
Get well soon before it’s too late
@shellytaylor585610 ай бұрын
Prayers going up for you. May the most high give you the strength to get clean and make it through life 🙏🏾✨💫✨💫
@OkcBilly10 ай бұрын
@@acmhfmggru thank you , I got accepted into a nice rehab today .
@BuIIet10 ай бұрын
If it's everywhere, then you might consider changing your surroundings. Easier said than done, I understand.
@sissy856310 ай бұрын
Sitting here in my bed mad because I got to work tonight, and I'm tired but can't get my nights and days turned, so I know I'll be sleepy as hell tonight.. but watching this humbles me because my life could be soooo much worse.. 😢❤😢
@murderycatdoll138010 ай бұрын
Yeah same....this Videos put the own "Problems" in another Perspektive. 😕
@elflakeador0910 ай бұрын
Just say no to drugs
@unknown-sx8sn10 ай бұрын
Yeah homie the earth doesn’t revolve around you and your pitiful life. Grow a pair and move on!
@kimberlypoole532510 ай бұрын
Ain't that the truth
@xNatheeeGamer9 ай бұрын
@@murderycatdoll1380 Your biggest issue is your spelling of perspective...
@tarence58239 ай бұрын
Personally 3 years clean. And every time the urge had ever popped into my head I watch Marks videos. Thank you for the videos as a reminder. And i prey everyone on here has the strength to want to quit and have a better life.
@knowwe10 ай бұрын
Johnny talked about this bent-back thing experienced by some Fentanyl users, but actually seeing it is something else, whoa!
@craigslist698810 ай бұрын
never watched his videos from Philadelphia? (I think, somewhere northeast) It's worse than skid row because the fentanyl there was cut with some sort of tranquilizer, they call it 'tranq' and it causes people to literally walk around like zombies with giant open wounds showing BONE, talking about whether letting maggots feed on them is 'healthy' or not, until eventually it gets septic and they go to the ER and get it amputated. And of course.. they go back to using so there's a bunch of amputees there doing drugs. And in all that there's a ton of people walking bent over. Those videos are wild. I was worried we would start seeing tranq in LA, thankfully haven't (knock on wood).
@nicche51110 ай бұрын
Yeah I live in SF and you often see people on the street bent over like that. It's terrible how fentanyl got into the drug market, it's a whole different ballgame now and very very difficult to treat
@BelindaM4410 ай бұрын
Look up Osteomyelitis from drug use.
@Tony-hu7uk10 ай бұрын
Does anyone know what happened to Johnny?
@fatimamelo385810 ай бұрын
This tormented man needs so much love ...😢
@mellowpepper478410 ай бұрын
Definitely my all time favorite answer to Mark's question "What would you say is the most important lesson you've learned in your lifetime?" Nice
@marshasindicich933510 ай бұрын
I'm from the Bay Area. Been here my whole life. My kids born and raised in the Bay. It's really sad seeing such a beautiful city infested with sadness. Taking Bart is not safe anymore, walking the streets of S.F. is not safe like it use to be. Pan handlers are very aggressive and at times violent. My son and I have been out going to an event in the city and he had to protect me physically. No way to start a mom son night out. I hope this gentleman can get help. He is so young. My daughter is his age and life is just beginning. Good luck
@jamesanderson353710 ай бұрын
Your only comment is feeling bad yourself? Really?
@dubaiedge10 ай бұрын
@@jamesanderson3537no, bc she's writing the truth from a resident's point of view, & the interviewee is one of thousands just like this everywhere. If you've never walked around there, you can't fathom what it's like on the daily. It's downright dangerous to live there, & I say that as someone who lived in Oakland, & several other cities & states across the U.S. In fact, right now I live in salt lake's worst neighborhood. It's laughable ppl here *think this area is bad.*
@jamesanderson35379 ай бұрын
@@dubaiedge OK, but this is about he's struggle not yours
@krisstapleton1969 ай бұрын
@jamesanderson3537 people make comments relating to the subjects struggles all the time. Just because she isn't a junky doesn't mean her experience isn't relevant.
@kakarikidiet55869 ай бұрын
As a fellow resident, I can vouch that SF has gotten way worse in last 30 years.. crime, drugs, education, and general quality and culture is just horrendous to see fall. Most folks who never have seen what it was like when times were 100 times better, won’t understand why folks who have been here would harbor such saddening opinions. But when you see the fall of a world class city go to a world class dump… it’s really sad 😢
@zeezerzam10 ай бұрын
Did anyone else straighten up their back when they saw his posture 😮?
@TattooMyBones7 ай бұрын
Nope
@MM-equine29 күн бұрын
LoL yeah
@13vo710 ай бұрын
This one struck me with a melancholy I can't explain. Sometimes there's just no reason why.
@invaderjaymz10 ай бұрын
I think it might be because he is so young and it looks like he has done some irreparable physical damage to his body.
@13vo79 ай бұрын
@@invaderjaymz More, it’s about his story, he couldn’t recall any major traumas in his life. One of the big questions for addiction is Why? and usually we have a answer like they were traumatized as a child. But some people had good childhoods, families and still choose a hard path, self destruction. Why? I couldn’t see the answer clearly with Tony.. he doesn’t seem to either. Tony still has ambitions and dreams removed from his current reality.. He doesn’t see himself there. Every person needs dignity to sleep at night… every person holds on tight to what keeps them safe, I must dream while i’m awake.
@pattipaugh999810 ай бұрын
Prayers for the sick & suffering🙏
@jackiemarsh247010 ай бұрын
Amen!!🙏🙏
@WildSmile7010 ай бұрын
🙏🏻
@xtentacion720910 ай бұрын
I find his concept of ‘scanning’ quite intriguing. His thought process must be a complete maze . I hope he finds peace one day
@leneo173110 ай бұрын
Could you please explain what he ment by scanning? I'm Scandinavian so I had a struggle trying to understand what he said in the first place and the word scan and his explanation gave me more questions than answers. He sort of gave three different examples and meanings which were totally different the way I interpreted it. One time he talked about it together with being psychic if I got it right so I thought maybe it ment something out of this world like some skill he believes he has. But in the end he talked about wanting his life back and then his scanning would be so much better. That made me think he just ment scanning means his overall understanding and reading of people and situations. I have no idea. My own scanning is probably totally out of touch!
@heavenlydays283810 ай бұрын
Could be a ( Skitzaphrina trait) IF. thats it MAYBE??!
@leneo173110 ай бұрын
@@heavenlydays2838 But what does he mean by the word scanning?
@leneo173110 ай бұрын
@@heavenlydays2838 I personally don't see him as typical Schizophrenic. He's answering Mark's questions and are aware of his surroundings. But he definitely seems like he's done some other drug than opioids. Either meth or crack.
@DrSoundZero10 ай бұрын
@@leneo1731- I'm inclined to guess that he's talking about something like trying to find awareness or relevance realization by investigating the infinite minutiae of what he is noticing in the moment - like his homelessness, thoughts, words, body, posture, etc. ad infinitum. He talks about being stressed with homelessness and "this whole other world" of staying scanned. He goes on to refer to it as higher levels of thinking and not really care. He mentioned fentanyl being like a crutch which I took to mean a break from the exhaustive practice of scanning (I could be wrong). He talked about the word-endings like "tion" as scanning or underlining words and that scanning the word for you. Lastly he talked about the body and using poses to "pick yourself up a little bit" as scanning, since he found something useful and relevant. In each instance he describes or implies it being a difficult practice. With all these disparate thoughts representing "scanning" I think he's talking about a broad type of practice that is positive but difficult or impossible to sustain. He talks about it as if it's something from which he needs breaks, since it's too exhausting (in my understanding of his ramblings). By the way, as an American-English speaker I also had a very hard time understanding Tony!
@ChubbyKittyMeow10 ай бұрын
That thumbnail photo- he looks like a rock star
@user-yn7on7ou8n10 ай бұрын
Looks like Sean Penn
@landondc473910 ай бұрын
If he could play a guitar, no one would question it.
@JDS-y1u10 ай бұрын
Yeah he's great looking to me
@aircooledvw9 ай бұрын
Scott Weiland is who I thought of based on the thumbnail
@Sirkiller1769 ай бұрын
@@user-yn7on7ou8n no are you blind? He look like Pete Townshend
@alexislaughlin659910 ай бұрын
Dear Jesus help Tony and everyone else struggling with drug addiction, set them free in your mighty name Jesus! Amen
@suzannedowning235610 ай бұрын
Amen🙏
@keeper645810 ай бұрын
Amen 🙏
@jackiemarsh247010 ай бұрын
Amen!!🙏🙏
@Robertarelli66610 ай бұрын
@@eligiolthat creature called god doesn't exist of course 😂
@AndyBankside9 ай бұрын
Clearly a very bright and thoughtful guy. Just so lost. Absolutely heartbreaking
@carlitasway247710 ай бұрын
He’s less and less coherent as the interview goes on. A mind is a terrible thing to waste.
@trteeerryfse-wy2ww9 ай бұрын
How about to taste? 👿
@portlandgoose47279 ай бұрын
@@trteeerryfse-wy2wwcringe
@jaymoniezoz9 ай бұрын
@@trteeerryfse-wy2wwhuh?
@Remy2128910 ай бұрын
As someone already mentioned in the comments, Johnny explains in one of his videos that with prolonged use, fentanyl will attack the kidneys. I have a brother in law who went through dialysis and a kidney transplant. He was lucky to find a match. Ironically the kidney donor was a kid that overdosed. The wait list for a transplant can go on for years. After the transplant you have to take meds for life to keep your immune system from attacking the new kidneys.
@jenniferweed255210 ай бұрын
I'm surprised they could use a kidney from a perosn who overdosed
@user-mq6dy2ee5f10 ай бұрын
@@jenniferweed2552 often it's a young person who wasn't using long term and easily OD's so their organs are still in good health at the time of donation. A good friend of mine was a recipient of an overdose donor kidney and his donor was pretty young.
@jennh20969 ай бұрын
I have seem thousands of people with kidney problems and failure, and it doesn't do that to your posture. I don't think it has anything to do with the kidneys, although lots of drugs can lead to kidney failure. This is from nodding out so much and getting stuck in that stooped position that it likely messes up the back and spine severely. Chronically bad posture can cause spinal issues, imagine chronically horrific posture of staying bent over for more than half your life, sleeping on hard concrete and benches, etc
@LK-pn5rx10 ай бұрын
A life lesson to be learnt here is stay away from drugs.
@towerofresonance487710 ай бұрын
How original
@marlenemcmillan889110 ай бұрын
You make your bed and lay in it... A saying from my mother
@Teabonesteak10 ай бұрын
Yet idiots still don't get it.
@Aphex5110 ай бұрын
@@marlenemcmillan8891 She was a George Herbert fan then.
@brianplatz408110 ай бұрын
Insightful
@DrFaust-pr8vw10 ай бұрын
I eventually told myself "my father has already had to bury one son, I won't make him do it again." The tranq made it basically impossible to enjoy anyway and was turning me into a zombie. So I said "enough is enough." However I'm lucky enough to have a solid support system who didn't give up on me. There are communities out there to help you through before it's too late. It's a completely different world in that scene these days and I recommend anyone struggling to find help before it's too late.
@stephaniezini9 ай бұрын
My brother od'd and passed away pretty much in my arms at age 38, two years ago, he was my best friend, we had like a soul-mate brother-sister connection and its caused me so much pain, depression, ptsd...i miss him every day and i will for the rest of my life. He was different. Incredibly smart, certified in SO many things but had trouble holding down jobs. A true artist and a comedian, made me laugh crying all the time, i can only hope ill laugh like that again some day. I wish the best for this man and everyone struggling. I never gave up on my brother and i never will. I pray this man finds his way to better days. Rest in peace my brother Aaron ❤
@patriciawilson697810 ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing, Tony.
@kdeloris222510 ай бұрын
I think he knows what he wants to say but the drugs want allow any clarity. It's hard to function like that. I hope he gets well soon.💝
@nicche51110 ай бұрын
I live in SF. The amount of people you see on fent is so, so saddening, it hurts my heart. And people speak of homeless people so terribly here. The only thing that separates them from us is their use of fentanyl. Most of them are harmless and good people. One of the greatest diseases in humanity is fentanyl usage. It's even getting into other street drugs now.
@deeman08889 ай бұрын
Only in America though. Why is that? Someone needs to fix it. It would never be an issue in the UK.
@reigningrio441610 ай бұрын
Praying for this guy 🙏
@jackiemarsh247010 ай бұрын
Amen!!🙏🙏
@mrmav188910 ай бұрын
All the best Tony sounds like drugs from an early age has had a huge impact on your life. You look like a good soul.. hang in there!
@obadiahsmith234510 ай бұрын
Was the pun intended?
@yonikki10 ай бұрын
I can not follow his thought process ... I feel like I'm on drugs trying to interpret his wizardry- witchcraft experiences. This channel should be shared with all high school students so they can see how drugs scramble your brain and destroy your livelihood. I feel awful for his poor kiddo ... still in his formative years and fatherless.
@brookebowers122910 ай бұрын
Tony has a beautiful face .I am sad that his high caused his thoughts to nod in and out and into conspiracy theories.He surely would be a candidate for help - his kidney - back condition is something that we need to be informed about so there can be a medical solution to this affliction =. He was aware he was nodding off and apologised . i feel this was a missed opportunity on how to help this affliction . No human should be debilitated by this pain . That should be the moniker for this interview - PAIN , Beautiful camera work Mark , even on the street scenes , I admire and see your references to Mary Ellen Mark in this work . Good Morning SWU toute le monde still quater to twelve in Bantry Bay West Cork Ireland .
@LA-nm4mn10 ай бұрын
Making him bend over like that. It’s a freaking tranquilizer. They take massive course of your body though. Be crazy. I don’t doubt. He’s also got some internal issues. Most likely directly caused by his drug use. My goodness you are so gullible gullible.
@carolfonville594210 ай бұрын
He almost sounds like someone one opiates who has had "VERY" little sleep in a really long time and his mind just drifts along with a bit of mental illness of course..much luck to you, i hope you can get yourself clean and your life together 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
@mikedoyle590110 ай бұрын
Fedy is ravishing this man mentally & physically.
@wendymansingh768410 ай бұрын
I'll pray for you. My son died of fentanel overdose he was 28. He didn't think he was going to die also.
@215Ghouls5 ай бұрын
🙏🙏🙏🙏
@MicheleOverton9 ай бұрын
When he said "i cant wait for the day i get my whole life back together again, i have a lot to offer". And what he said subsequently, took my heart. He cant wait to be clean, he's waiting for a miracle. Please lets all pray he finally gives up and shows up on the doorstep of a rehab. Lets pray GOOD competent enthusiastic unburnt out people are working that day. That they are up to the challenging task of teaching him how staying clean, treating his illness works. Lets pray these people can connect him with GOOD Drs and a sponsor and that they love what they do, so this man may feel that his team is genuine, that they really care. So that he will trust putting his life in their hands. That he achieves being clean and sober. Sweet Man☀️
@domovancan8 ай бұрын
Amen to that! ❤
@murphymomof910 ай бұрын
It is breaking my heart to watch these SF videos, but thank you, Mark, for featuring them. It is criminal what has happened there. The current powers-that-be have dropped the ball with their tolerance of crime and laissez-faire policies, despite knowing 3 overdoses occur each week. In my opinion, the devastation and havok Fentanyl has wreaked on US cities (and now Xylanine, the "zombie" drug) can be traced to the lack of enforcement of laws and vetting of those who come into our country. The drug cartels and their traffickers have it too easy here. I pray Tony receive the addiction and mental health care that he needs -- not only for himself, but for his young child.
@kimthompson384610 ай бұрын
You know most of this stuff comes in on boats, right? There's not enough white people in the world to carry this amount over the borders. Yes, white people are the main transporters of drugs over the Mexican border. Mexicans get checked too hard by Border Control.
@dubaiedge10 ай бұрын
Lived there 19 years. It got remarkably worse & I'm so grateful I escaped in '07. I can't imagine the shitshow downtown & the Mission have become by now. There's however many residents barely doing food & rent but nothing whatsoever left over. I was stuck for years & only able to move out of state bc I got a buy out when the landlord paid us to go so he could take over the house. I voted Democrat the whole time, too, so it's ppl like me partly to blame 😬
@murphymomof910 ай бұрын
@@dubaiedge I've lived fairly close by for 37 years. I have so many beautiful memories traveling there on the weekends with my family, or visiting friends. It's nowhere near the same. And it doesn't have to be this way. Thanks for replying. :-) Have a great evening.
@keithyp842710 ай бұрын
1250 over here in London, hope today turns out to be as good as it can be for you
@ianfisher562310 ай бұрын
Dude Tony needs a life line...38 is still young. I'm so sorry Tony about why you've given up, un do this man. Smart man you are.
@Teabonesteak10 ай бұрын
Yeah, real smart guy here.
@akamomakawife492810 ай бұрын
Mark thank you for all the great awesome work you do thank you blessings and prayers for everyone in the world 🌎❤❤
@gretchen242810 ай бұрын
That was rough watching 😢 so sad and so far gone for 38. God Bless
@twwoody81310 ай бұрын
This guy seems like a genuinely nice person. Even though he is very disabled by his addiction. Amazingly he is still able to take reasonable care of himself. I hope Mark can help him.
@MicheleOverton9 ай бұрын
Me too. I hope so too.🦡
@AMFJ410 ай бұрын
The spiritual battle is real. God have mercy and deliver this man 🙏🏼🕊
@ritamccomas927110 ай бұрын
Good morning, Mark 🌻 This guy makes me so sad
@RAREDRAGONFRUIT10 ай бұрын
Thanks Tony for giving me more empathy for the homeless in our community. ❤🐉👍🏼👍🏼
@BelindaM4410 ай бұрын
Aww, God bless him. So young, and hard to walk. I pray he can get help, and have a good life.❤✌
@mariannecherkas101510 ай бұрын
Good morning from cowtown, it’s not quite 5am. Early start to a busy day. 😊 Best of luck to Tony, hope you turn your life around.
@Dwh196010 ай бұрын
@@baublesanddolls🇨🇦🇨🇦
@snoozedoctor10 ай бұрын
His back pain and posture are typical of severe ankylosing spondylitis, a disease that typically presents in relatively young people. He needs an x-ray, or other scan to assess. Poor soul.
@snoozedoctor10 ай бұрын
@@acmhfmggru Do you have a link to some literature on that? I can't seem to find much about opioids causing spinal deformity and can't think of a mechanism that would cause it, other than trauma while intoxicated. I'm well aware of fentanyl muscular rigidity, a temporary condition I encountered often whilst doing high dose fentanyl, or sufentanil, as an anesthetic technique. That's not a chronic issue though.
@Melissao-lk1dr10 ай бұрын
Good morning from Lexington, KY May you be blessed Tony your son needs you clean!! Please get some mental health❤️ we all need mental health I’m a firm believer!! we are human and no one’s perfect or your son and his bright future and your future mental health is where you need to start!!
@almightyrizzob868210 ай бұрын
Fentanyl must paralyze the abdominal muscles because a lot of them walk around hunched over like question marks. They also tend to pass out in whatever position they happen to be in when the drug hits. Some of the kids have swollen hands and feet that are purple and appear to be rotting. I imagine if they live long enough those will have to be amputated. It must be a tremendous high because there's certainly a lot of them, especially in Civic Center. They're relatively docile during the day but it gets wild out here at night. Whatever you've heard, it's worse. You wouldn't believe it
@PuraVida544610 ай бұрын
What’s it like at night vs day?
@brianshaner886510 ай бұрын
Wow. And I thought the guy I know was the best at just talking about absolutely nothing that makes sense. But this dude here takes the cake! Holy moly.
@BelindaM4410 ай бұрын
Geez, he can’t help it. My heart breaks for this man.
@brianshaner886510 ай бұрын
@@BelindaM44 and you know this, how? I’m pretty sure he could have helped it. Just like his walking now. He has meth to thank for that. He did it to himself. Nobody else. I can’t feel bad for him.
@Gladgrampa10 ай бұрын
@brianshaner8865 Oh God, you're one of THOSE people. Such a small-minded, unintelligent person. I can't imagine being that way. Ignorance is bliss tho I suppose 😂
@ethanzinsky50049 ай бұрын
Bro I'm willing to bet that's fentanyl
@HumboldtMama70710 ай бұрын
Tony has a family who loves him very much and have been searching for him for some time! Please, Tony if you read this, contact your sisters! They are looking for you and want to help you.
@thematriarchy20759 ай бұрын
He is in the Tenderloin SF
@bonniejean20710 ай бұрын
I hope Tony can get the help he needs 🙏 ❤
@patricklary8110 ай бұрын
This was the hardest interview to listen to. He mumbled and talked so fast and low that it was impossible to understand. I hope he figures it out.
@pinkythechihuahua315610 ай бұрын
SAME here. I finally had to end watching. I couldn't hang. Couldn't understand him.
@vickihenriksson643610 ай бұрын
I watched my son begin believing in Magic. He could read ppl's minds and could predict the future. He was a college graduate. Had a law degree, but suddenly became mentally ill. We never found out what was causing this. He didn't take fentanyl.
@powderandpaint1410 ай бұрын
Schizophrenia?
@kayem990910 ай бұрын
Is he OK now?
@charlescook55429 ай бұрын
@@acmhfmggru they said he BELIEVED that he could fortune tell, not that he could
@j.a.r.family257610 ай бұрын
Suboxone saved my life . I couldn't imagine where I'd be if i didn't take it. I could have been him. Blessings to this man and i hope he finds his way soon. If not. Hope he lives a good life
@colbycramer12149 ай бұрын
Suboxone saved my life as well, I’ll be one year clean off of fentanyl in 4 days and I finally have a sense of clarity
@zemocon28686 ай бұрын
Suboxone ruined my life because in my country heroin and fentanyl is really rare. Suboxone is used as a street drug. I'm in treatment but the shit no longer works at all, I don't even feel normal. More like slightly dope sick 24/ 7.
@teejay32729 ай бұрын
Remember when Nancy Reagan, who was a mess of a person, launched the "Just Say No" campaign in the old days and got slammed for the simplicity of it? I think she was right. That's literally the answer.
@katttpiffnsam10 ай бұрын
“You don’t have a bed” 😂 cmon Mark its too early for that!
@wesleyAlan917910 ай бұрын
😂
@S1mL1fe10 ай бұрын
If you watch these and find humor in them, you’re lucky and been blessed with a good life
@prague770610 ай бұрын
@@S1mL1feI feel pretty lucky but I don’t find this stuff very funny. Sure, there are some funny moments but big picture is kind of bleak.
@S1mL1fe10 ай бұрын
@@prague7706 that’s my point. It’s not funny to me at all. I’ve lost many people to addiction. People that laugh about it make me sick
@keeper645810 ай бұрын
@@S1mL1feAgreed
@FanuOmolade6 ай бұрын
I pray this young man finds himself someday.
@jackiankney7 ай бұрын
Just stayed in the tenderloin, unintentionally, what a scary place. Didn't know about it until my sister and I got followed, harassed and assaulted by a homeless man that was obviously on some drugs and mentally unstable...so I ended up doing some research on the area. Yikes. If you're a female, especially alone, don't stay in the tenderloin or outskirts of it. Not safe. Always have a blade ready too. Or pepper spray. Something. I am very fit, I've done mma and jiu jitsu for years but it didn't prepare to think about fighting for my actual life. Be prepared.
@johnhinton827310 ай бұрын
i think "scanning" is a reference to a scanner darkly, it certainly tracks. "if the scanner sees only darkly, the way I myself do.." is the quote i remembered
@kaylamay57855 ай бұрын
I can feel what he’s saying. I wish I could visit with him. Much love.
@AnnieO10010 ай бұрын
I don’t think anybody wants to end up addicted to anything. My son was an opiate addict for over 15 years. It totally ruined his life. He’s about to serve 3 years in Lansing Prison.
@shellytaylor585610 ай бұрын
🙏🏾✨🙏🏾✨🙏🏾 For you and your son May the most high give you and your son strength to make it through these hard times 🙏🏾✨💫
@AntiPlatitude10 ай бұрын
Tony can stand. His disability is psychosomatic. He’s convinced himself that there is a “weight” on his back, and so there is. I would wager that if doctors were able to examine him, they’d find no physical abnormalities.
@mikewarner558310 ай бұрын
Goodmorning from Milwaukee Wisconsin. Tony best wishes bro!
@TRANQUILSOUNDSANDMUSIC10 ай бұрын
Oshkosh Wisconsin here👋
@david2121610 ай бұрын
Same brother, gotta get to my 8am 😭@@TRANQUILSOUNDSANDMUSIC
@ATeLLoZ10 ай бұрын
Sheboygan 👋
@jimmatthews644110 ай бұрын
Tony needs serious help, his life is confused and must be hell. Stevens Point, Wi
@thecozystarflower9 ай бұрын
I was very curious about his topic on scanning so I had to look it up and if it had anything to do with spirituality and I found out that it’s a meditation technique where you pause and just take notice and feel if there is anything out of the ordinary going on w your body such as aches, pains, etc .. and I can say he was explaining it well, I had to really think about it though. I feel like Tony really does have a lot of knowledge to share to the world regarding life and spirituality. I hope he finds himself soon so we can hear more of what he has to say.
@princessbuttercup347410 ай бұрын
I wish I knew what he was trying to say about this whole scanning thing. In his mind it makes sense, I wish I could understand what he was trying to relay to us 🙏🏽❤️
@tsilver320410 ай бұрын
10.09pm Australia
@leneo173110 ай бұрын
It broke my heart when Tony said: "I'm only 38. I still have a lot more life to live." Sadly not. Firstly there's nothing about this which even resemble a life or living. It's nothing but the most horrible existence, no life whatsoever. It doesn't matter if you're poor or rich, young or old, materialistic or not, no sane person would call this a, life. The fact that he considers his existence a life is so sad. Second his body is already showing signs of serious illness and damage from the drug abuse. When your kidneys start hurting and show signs of shutting down it could be just weeks before you need invasive medical treatment such as dialysis. Obviously in his situation there's no way he'd be able to follow through such extensive treatment. I hope for a miracle because that's what he needs He's been using hard drugs for way over 20 years and not even having a son got him out of the grip of drugs. I don't believe you can get any deeper into it than he is and unfortunately he seems very distant from the hard facts of his horrible situation.
@maizegod684010 ай бұрын
Nice
@Teabonesteak10 ай бұрын
He's a lost cause.
@Clo_Dub10 ай бұрын
I say this in the nicest way possible: i could do with subtitles for him…
@12themilkman9 ай бұрын
I was thinking the same thing, but then realized that I wasn’t having trouble understanding his words, he was having trouble using the words.
@0scarWalsh10 ай бұрын
Anyone have any idea what he's talking about with "scanning"? Mentioned underlining words, then doing your body in certain positions? I couldn't make a shred of sense out of it.
@wesleyAlan917910 ай бұрын
I wished I knew,Oscar. I was trying to understand also.
@SoftWhiteUnderbelly10 ай бұрын
I asked Tony to explain that. I was even more confused after hearing his explanation.
@craigslist698810 ай бұрын
except for the weird word underline example I was guessing he thinks it's telepathy... But I would make sense of it more generally as a thing, a pattern I've noticed with the drug induced psychosis denial - he's made up an additional layer to reality (this seems likely to be the real origin of all the crazy bible stories about angels and demons). Usually it's something that they think everyone is doing secretly or are all unaware of (like angels/demons), 'scanning' is something everyone in this case is doing. So for example he gets kicked out of a store and blames it on his inability to 'scan' rather than whatever reality his mind doesn't want to admit to, like he's incoherent, smells bad, or doesn't have clothes on, etc. Or he gets arrested for stealing a car but actually the problem was he couldn't 'scan' the cops. Basically it vaguely fills in the gap for why he is where he is that makes it not because he keeps doing drugs... in fact the drugs 'help' him with the real problem, that he can't 'scan'.
@gregbors836410 ай бұрын
Well, if he’s taking that word from the David Cronenberg movie “Scanners,” it means telepathy / being able to project your mental will onto others. Kind of like a “Jedi mind trick”
@craigslist698810 ай бұрын
@@gregbors8364 that is very likely the source
@Willow-as-Phoenix10 ай бұрын
MARK, GET THIS GUY A HOTEL AND NEW CLOTHES LIKE YOU DO WITH REBECCA!!!
@Teabonesteak10 ай бұрын
I don't think Mark is attracted to Tony.
@Willow-as-Phoenix10 ай бұрын
@@Teabonesteak Exactly! And all the Rebecca stuff is a fetish and I can't see how people don't realize it. Mark is the dominant person in all his relationship and that's why he wants someone to treat him like garbage like Rebecca does, and Rebecca def knows what he is doing.
@mamaberg62310 ай бұрын
Tony, you need help, and I hope you find it. You deserve a better life, to be safe, and your son deserves his daddy in his life.
@kenhur98009 ай бұрын
Don't feel sorry for this guy. He CHOSE drugs over everything else. His only regret is he didn't finish high school. No mention of the people he hurt, including himself
@r0ck0des0ck010 ай бұрын
I work in downtown SF. The whole place is full of zombies and ghouls. My students are afraid to walk home from school and I don't blame them. The SF city council is too busy voting for a ceasefire in Gaza to do anything about it. It's absurd. I live in Oakland. That place is out of control too. I got mugged at the lake twice in one week. The DA vowed to give lighter sentences to blacks and stiffer sentences to whites in order to "rectify historical inequities." It's gotten so bad they're going to have to call in the National Guard to fix it. Hopefully I'll be in Texas by then. This place SUCKS
@jennierose677210 ай бұрын
I lived in SF for 12 years and left because of what it has turned into. When you move to TX or a different state, please don't vote for the policies that helped turn SF & Oakland into the way they are now.
@unknown-sx8sn10 ай бұрын
@@jennierose6772. I suppose Trump will solve the problem and wave his magical wand to make it all disappear and will live in the wizard of oz🙄sure Jan
@kimthompson384610 ай бұрын
exactly. They can go to Abbottland and see his performative theater up close and personal.@@unknown-sx8sn
@michaelporter44974 ай бұрын
I grew up in Pacifica which is just north of Half Moon Bay. I grew up with people that had similar interests to Tony before he started using - skating, snowboarding, chillin by the beach, etc. This man is lost mentally and I'm praying he finds his way.
@fabiennesaam430710 ай бұрын
Hi from Zurich Switzerland❤
@Teabonesteak10 ай бұрын
Love Zurich❤
@joko0901010 ай бұрын
“It’s like someone put a weighted vest on you and you’re like - whoa that’s too heavy!” That pretty much describes addiction in a nutshell. “Sorry if it didn’t make sense.” Damn. 💔
@Boos_Boswell10 ай бұрын
Lets get real and heal
@dianeboudrias79549 ай бұрын
I feel so incredibly sad for Tony 😢 he reminds me of my brother Bryan who is a serious drug addict/ alcoholic and he also lives on the streets. 😢
@chicagolifetv10 ай бұрын
Sadly I’m still addicted to fentanyl and need help any suggestions? Before Ite to late for me😢
@mysticmama74010 ай бұрын
Handsome man, very sad. Cant tell if its mental illness or drugs or both? Its humbling to hear ppl talk about their regrets. I wish him the best. He is far gone.
@junglegirl517410 ай бұрын
Wishing u all the best Tony. Hope to see you again ❤
@BEKYH8310 ай бұрын
This guy makes me sad. 😢 He looks miserable and to have your back like that must be the worst thing ever! I wish him positive Energy.
@keemez10 ай бұрын
mmm that fishtaily braid/twist of yours... om nom nom
@Mary-ik1zf10 ай бұрын
Morning from London.
@Toonces66610 ай бұрын
Regards to London, Mary. Good morning to you!
@Thanos8888810 ай бұрын
Ladies and gentlemen, meet fentenyl. Once it has someone, their likelihood of coming back is very small. I've lost a couple of old friends to it in the last year. Without forced rehabilitation, fentenyl addicts have no hope.
@morgenmachen240010 ай бұрын
That's untrue. You're talking to someone who beat the odds right now. I understand why you say that though. I know it hurts to lose people you love. But don't take hope away from others by putting that message out there. I'm not asking you to invest personally in any addict, just don't take away their hope.
@REZ_SENSEI10 ай бұрын
When sober and programmed we take for granted our reasoning and situation. When drugged and alone we cherish our reasoning and miss the programmed days. Praying for purpose and peace🙏🏾
@tsilver320410 ай бұрын
Thanks Mark
@rabbitskinner10 ай бұрын
I had fentanyl at a hospital for kidney stone, I'll be honest I still think of the high 2 years later....Fentanyl is powerful shit!
@sublime74809 ай бұрын
What did it make you feel like?
@rabbitskinner9 ай бұрын
@@sublime7480 free from this world mentally and physically, basically pure heaven....
@wolfmayner627410 ай бұрын
Wizardry, witchcraft, spells, scanning... I wonder what the experience he's actually having in his head is like? It's so strange that a person can seemingly drift between being totally coherent and reasonable to being completely lost and nonsensical in seconds. He seems to answer questions pretty quickly and realistically, and gives answers that sound truthful and forthcoming, but then a few thoughts later he's gone off course into something that clearly isn't real, but it's real to him. He doesn't know how to make sense of it to other people. And it's not clear how much of the delusions are from drugs, or an underlying mental disorder that he's undiagnosed with, it could be schizophrenia but I can't tell the difference between that and the potential psychosis that comes from fentanyl and meth abuse and staying up for too long.
@WilliamHarper-nn5rz10 ай бұрын
Very insightful and well stated. Dual diagnosis candidate.
@brendanbourke548710 ай бұрын
Hope you get out of this shit Tony man I hope we see a follow up with you standing tall and proud and most importantly free.
@metuselahjones690510 ай бұрын
100 years we are going to look back on this era as a monumental failure in policy and law, mental and physical health care and permitted drug abuse. Seriously, 100 years from now, people will gasp at how barbaric and idiotic we were.
@Clerpy9 ай бұрын
"Tony what is the most important thing you've learned?" "How to pat your money, you know? We can all make our money by patting ourselves. And then before money, there was nothing, it was just like what do you have to trade me, besides your money. And then i learned how to make my hypnotizing walk coincide with my spell world. So it hydrated my fuckin....hypnotized life, and it made a really calm and peaceful environment, where i was able to approve a credit barrier around me to protect my life. So that was probably the coolest thing I ever did * laughs*, make a credit barrier to create a spell around my hypnotized walk and then show other people how to make that"
@sean851410 ай бұрын
Johnny you CAN get out of this life and eternal cycle of addiction! I'm living proof. I'm so grateful to have gotten out of this life. I was addicted to heroin for a little more than 20 years. I got out 4.5 years ago right when fentanyl was starting to explode.
@rjp281310 ай бұрын
I watch these videos and a lot of people can be saved. This guy isn’t one of them. He’s too far gone. Very sad
@thematriarchy207510 ай бұрын
You don't know that.
@FullofCrapp10 ай бұрын
just pray for him.
@codylarkhart26110 ай бұрын
why just because you presume so? You don't know what will happen in this mans future, let alone determine he is a "lost cause".
@rjp281310 ай бұрын
You’re right. Hope for the best i guess…
@rjp281310 ай бұрын
He’s gone… the drugs have eaten his brain he can’t even make sense while speaking
@alissanix558710 ай бұрын
I hope that he can get himself clean. Prayers for you. It’s the best thing one can do for themselves! I thank God I got away when I did