French People Never Do Small Talk (Learn French)

[@kmw4359]

A former boss of mine (French) once told me that in his opinion, Americans are like peaches and French are like coconuts. With a peach, everything is soft and easy on the outside and then you hit a stone that you can’t get past. With a coconut, you have to work to get past the hard shell but then everything is sweet. (“Once you’re in, you’re family.”)

[@naderzekrya5238]

spot on 👍

[@kmw4359]

@Phillip Banes you do know that the nut in the center of a peach is called a stone, correct?

[@kmw4359]

@Phillip Banes best guess at whatever the hell you meant about my former boss

[@Kyzcago]

Exaggeration.

[@dtown2816]

@@kmw4359 he's objecting to the idea that Americans are "stone" at the center. Ppl aren't a monolith.

[@igalbitan5096]

As a curious French, I lauched your video and I must say repeating and articulate slowly is a good idea for non-fluent French speakers.

[@solamano7239]

Some of the most lively conversations I've ever had have been in doctors' waiting rooms in France!

[@georgina3358]

Depends how you define small talk. The example you gave of meeting an American woman who talked in detail about her life and family is not small talk. That's a person opening up immediately with complete strangers

[@marilyn6168]

Absolutely this video is misleading because I don’t think Geraldine understands what small talk is. I’m both French and English and it’s difficult to relate to what she’s saying, because she explains things in a confusing way, whether it’s about silence or small talk. I agree that talking about very personal topics are seeing as weird and some people do in France but they make the people around them feel uncomfortable. I would say the majority of French people actually do small talk. I love it myself but never talk about really personal topics with strangers.

[@dellacalfee]

Oversharing

[@tinabraxton4906]

Americans are accustomed to a paranoid environment. When an American is in the presence of strangers, they use personal talk to reassure everyone, without directly articulating it, that they are an ordinary, nice person and not there to harm you. In the US, one who says nothing or share nothing will draw suspicion.

[@DRL1320]

Georgina, thank you for making that point. There’s a difference, and intimate disclosures are by definition not talking small. My American parents taught me to think of small talk as precisely what’s prescribed in a large party setting, and that’s it’s an important skill in building the ground story of relationships. If you refuse to do it, you’re either childishly shy or just being snooty. You shouldn’t have gone to the party in the first place. I think I’ve met that same lady who disclosed amazingly private stuff to me when I didn’t even know her name. Fortunately, I don’t come across her much.

[@georgina3358]

@@DRL1320 thank you for your very thoughtful comment. I'm not against small talk, it's what keeps the social cogs of society running. People sometimes open up to strangers precisely because they are strangers, and they know they'll never see them again.

[@SebKent1]

This is an excellent topic to bring up, and it is quite true. My late mother, who was French, and most of her relatives, were just not comfortable with "small talk" and did not approve of sharing personal information with strangers, just for the sake of being friendly. On the other hand, once someone was considered to be part of their circle of acquaintance, conversation would go on for hours, often tackling politics, philosophy and many more "serious " topics.

[@simplyshama]

I'm the type to start talking philosophy and politics from the first conversation in both French and English 😂I love that the French are super invested in these kind of convos.

[@dreamarcher4018]

I am not French and have this attitude!

[@Cipricus]

This is an illusion. Do you really think more than 0.5% talk philosophy in Paris? Notwithstanding the fact that pretentious intellectual discussion at a bar is by definition small talk, normal people have other topics of discussion. But when 3-4 Parisians talk at a table, they can talk at the same time.

[@ggjr61]

I totally believe this of the French. My husband and I flew Air France once and it was the quietest flight I’ve every been on. The only people who talked at all were a small group of Americans who sat behind us. They weren’t talking loudly but it sounded really loud because the the rest of the plane was completely silent except when a flight attendant whispered something to a passenger and they whispered back. The plane could have been empty. We just sat there in silence for six hours whispering only when we had too. Fortunately we brought books with us.😂

[@Cipricus]

French do not speak in planes and trains, they do in restaurants.

[@naderzekrya5238]

@@CipricusI understand. Life is unbearable when not eating, and in the company of complete strangers

[@lli_loue]

very interesting video, I am French and live in Paris. but I was raised in the United States. I do small talk all the time and I have found that it surprises people but I usually get a nice reaction. people in France are not used to be complimented, or noticed by strangers and it often brings a smile to their face.

[@FrenchandEnglishtutor]

Merci. Cette leçon était indispensable. C'est pas toujours facile de comprendre où bien de savoir des nuances d'une culture étrangère. Vos leçons sont superbes comme d'habitude.

[@templeofeternallight]

I live in a small rural village in France and I don't do small talk I just talk to the small dogs that I meet on my walks. The dog owners I meet on my walks do the same with my dog so small dog talk is A ok:)

[@FrauDrSophieLouisaBennett]

It's the most sensible thing to do apart from talking to yourself 🥰😂

[@internationaleden]

So you’re saying if two people walk past each other on a sidewalk they won’t say “good morning” or somn? Or like a head nod like we do it🤣🤣🤣

[@deirdrewalsh1134]

Good manners or gentle consideration of “the other” is universal.

[@christopherdieudonne]

It's so funny to me when I hear French people say they don't do small talk. I teach English and I do a class on small talk. During the lesson, I always preface the lesson with "Small Talk is very American" to get on their good side then all the students agree. *HOWEVER*, after living in France for over 20 years, I can honestly say that French people *do* engage in small talk. I've experienced it *a lot* and so have my other ex-pat friends. Sure, they might not do it as much as Americans, but they definitely do !

[@KateOBrienCreative]

If the whole "ça va?" "ouai, ça va" thing isn't small talk, i don't know what is!! xD

[@town944folk]

@@KateOBrienCreative -That is very small talk indeed!

[@cameliap1146]

@@KateOBrienCreative et le temps qu'il fait/la température...autre sujet de "small talk" !

[@jeffmorse645]

I didn't know this of the French. The UK is the only place I've been in Europe and I definitely noticed the lack of small talk in SE England (London especially). We Americans love small talk and will strike up a short, pleasant conversation with strangers while in a shop or store or while standing in line. It just acknowledges your fellow humans and brightens the day a little. Now of course it can easily be carried too far (and you wish you could get alway from that person who keeps going on and on in an odd way), but for the most part I think it is one of the best qualities of our culture.

[@ExperiencedGhost]

@ Jeff Morse: Well... French do have small talk! I don't know why she said that. It's better to defiine what 'small talk' actually is. And one region isn't antoher region as well.

[@LongDistanceCall11]

OMG I honestly have zero idea why did youtube algorithmes advertised this video to me - I neither study French nor am an established Francophone, but I`m so thankful! This was extremely entertaining and educating at the same time, thank you so much, Dear Géraldine! Merci beaucoup! I hope I still remember how to write this difficult word in French:) Je suis votre nouvelle abonnée !

[@jackiedragonfly2461]

Only that it's not true, so the education part is a no-starter...

[@kashgarxian731]

Excellente mention du trait de l'esprit, merci ma chere

[@swanlake4483]

I personally love this about French culture.

[@ckzf1842]

Really love all your very useful and practical French lessons ! Thank Q!

[@jsschnc]

We have an expression in the US that is fairly new as far as I know. "Read the room." I take this to mean one should adapt to the situation one finds oneself in. In the context of this discussion, I think whether or not one makes small talk or not, (by the way, Americans say "make" small talk not "do" small talk), depends on the receptivity of the people or person you're speaking to, whether they're well known to you or you met them standing in line in the grocery store. I should mention I am an American who is also a fluent Francophone. Some of the best chit chats I've had have been been with French people I've met casually while in France. Who says French people don't like small talk?

[@alwaysrighton]

So true! I find small talk is excruciating. 😅

[@Sauvageonne]

It would be useful to define "small talk" at the beginning of the video. In London, one won't talk to strangers. When this happens (by miracle... or tipsiness) we do talk about the weather. It's easier to talk to strangers in Paris, like in a queue, to complain about everything but ourselves.

[@learnfrenchwithmeme5944]

Yes so true!!if you complain in the queue a bit loud, often the people around will react. Doesn't mean the conversation will continue but you can have interactions!

[@rsg6207]

Some people may just be shy socially but purposefully keeping silent because one does not "do small talk" is considered rude in America and makes people uncomfortable. We have to be aware of differences in what is considered acceptable manners while traveling.

[@adad-nerari4117]

J'aime bien ce proverbe chinois : "On se trouve toujours bien de ne pas dire ce qu'on n'est pas obligé de dire"

[@SE45CX]

What a nice background do you have. This including the style of clothing and makeup. Pleasant yellowish light. Very appealing!

[@BGTuyau]

Merci, Geraldine. Vous toujours proposez à votre public des leçons pratiques, intéressantes et bien realisées.

[@anthonyrobertson2011]

I'm American and I'm not big on small talk either. I'd rather stand in line in silence than try to think of something to say to fill the silence or pass the time with a stranger. If you are going to start small talk with me then you need to be good at leading the interaction. If the other person is really good at leading the interaction, then yes, I enjoy it and will engage. If not then periods of awkward silence it is. I have one good friend who is really good at leading conversations. It just amazes me sometimes.

[@wandagrayson646]

I was just going to say the same thing.

[@channul4887]

​@Phillip Banes​and so is being silent. Try practicing that.

[@channul4887]

@Phillip Banes I was only providing you with unsolicited advice, so basically I copied what you did in your first comment.

[@channul4887]

@Phillip Banes "except"? Mine was meant with good intentions too. It seems to me that you've got a bit of ego going on there. Or you're projecting. But then again you're referring to youtube as "forums" - 1990's are calling, they want you back.

[@marklee1960]

I like everything about your presentation. A pleasure.

[@kh23797]

Our East Anglian twinning association liaises with a French town of similar size, and exchanges are annual (Covid permitting). The two communities know each well and everyone will chat happily all night, depending on their language skills obviously. The small talk issue is really about strangers, but we English are typically less open than Americans who, in my experience, can be pretty self-revealing on first acquaintance. On the London underground, it isn't really done to start chatting up a stranger, and in the Paris metro, I found things similar. But on longer French train journeys, I have had interesting chats, probably because many younger French folk like to practise their English! Living 'en famille' in France, as I often used to, I found they chatted about politics and life in general about as much as we English do.

[@refractorymercury]

That's remind me back in 88 I had my military service in Germany and sat in the train next to a guy marking student's papers, he was an english teacher and talking he revealed he was serving in Vietnam as US special forces for intelligence in the Viet villages, he was speaking French and said if more of french fluent had been missionned, tons of more information would have been gathered as local were in confidence with the French, as nowadays I proudly count many fellows countrymen of Vietnamese origin who fled communist yoke.

[@paulharvey7278]

tenir la jambe -- talk my/his/one's ear off 🤣très drôle, j'aime bien la phrase

[@angeliquepiafbordeaux4107]

I'm French and hate small talk.And I've always been a loner except for my Priests. Have a very Merry Christmas.❤

[@TesterAnimal1]

Priests? Is that a mistranslation?

[@learnfrenchwithmeme5944]

are you a monk ? (priests)

[@kh23797]

@@TesterAnimal1 In the confessional, maybe? If you don't open up in there, you've missed the point, I guess.

[@jojiikeda6780]

Hello! You're back!

[@luluandmeow]

This is fascinating and new to me (new subscriber by the way). I remember meeting a French girl in London years ago, and the first thing she said to me was, "You can talk to me about serious things but I don't do small talk" and I was shocked by how direct she was, I stayed well clear of her lol! But now I understand where she came from and actually she might have tried to say that if I had a problem or I was upset about something she would have been happy to help. Instead I thought she was being very abrupt and unfriendly - I have thicker skin now!

[@Marcel_Audubon]

she was being abrupt and unfriendly

[@naderzekrya5238]

​@@Marcel_Audubon typically french from my experience

[@jsschnc]

You dodged a bullet.

[@300books]

She was simply saying "I won't share personal/intimate information" because English speakers have a tendency to ask personal questions or share private information with people they've just met, and that's considered rude to the French.

[@Marcel_Audubon]

@@300books French do it all the time, stop buying dumb generalizations

[@michaelcrummy8397]

Il vaut la peine d’apprendre et de se rendre compte des différences culturelles pour éviter des malentendus, surtout si on va voyager à l’étranger. J’espère que vous vous amusez en cette saison joyeuse Géraldine. 🎄🎅🏻

[@charlesvanderhoog7056]

True, true words if there ever were.

[@kh23797]

Bien sûr... and when I lived in France, I learned a vast amount about the French that I'd never suspected. They are both like, yet they differ from, the English, in many ways, but there is a lot of mutual understanding and sympathy, _away from international politics._ One lesson I have learned in France and other countries is, never to judge a nation's population by the idiots who govern them. Le Maistre said we get the government we deserve, but I'm not so sure, as those in charge seem often to be dismally unworthy of the people they govern.

[@hereforit2347]

I must be French at heart because this is me. ❤

[@josephinelogan9196]

Je suis anglaise et je vis dans l'extrême sud-ouest de la France. Les gens ici sont très bavards, quelle que soit la situation. Je suis assez calme par comparisan et j'aime le silence. Les gens ici sont adorables, très amicaux et chaleureux, et j'aime vivre ici.

[@kh23797]

Les Français du Nord prétendent souvent que les gens du Sud sont des "hypocrites"​-faux et enclins à faire semblant d'être amicaux. J'ai fait l'expérience de la vie dans les deux régions (étant, comme vous, anglais). Je pense que cette attitude a p/e été exacerbée par l'administration de Vichy pendant la guerre, à en juger par ce que les Français m'ont dit au fil des ans. Une telle division nationale peut avoir des effets secondaires pendant longtemps.

[@josephinelogan9196]

@@kh23797 Je trouve que la gentillesse des gens autour de moi ici dans le Sud est vraiment authentique.

[@josephinelogan9196]

@@kh23797 Je trouve que la gentillesse des gens autour de moi ici dans le Sud est vraiment authentique.

[@pierrekiroule2827]

The culture and practice of small talks is depending a lot on the area of France....

[@Prototype-357]

A culture after my own heart.

[@moonshynegirl172]

This is very good to know. I love quiet. Small talk in America is usually a way of finding commonality or a way of possibly making a new friend. True, in your face personal information is very off-putting when meeting anyone. I'm curious about the culture of making friends in France.

[@hwasansword]

Merci beaucoup pour cet information et votre explication. Je ne le connaissais pas. "Le silence, c'est du respect." Merci. :)

[@keouine]

I am confused. You can have small talk with long time friends or one's own mom and dad. Also, two total strangers standing together in a line can strike up a conversation that is NOT at all small talk if both want to. Small talk is harmless, banal pleasantries or sometimes might develop in a shallow observations of sports, recent weather abnormalities or price increases. Diving into a deep discussion about the causes and implications of this or that with a stranger is very unwelcome--even in America. Small talk lies between just saying "Good morning" and having a lengthier, detailed conversation.

[@shantaramhicks1029]

What a lovely lesson. Thank you!

[@djdag2000]

Very interesting. Thanks!

[@sa21g22g23]

Merci beaucoup pour enseigner cette magnifique et superbe et important leçon du jour

[@bytheway1031]

Great video! Merci Géraldine!

[@aroundandround]

I don’t find Americans diving into personal things during small talk either, just surface-level inconsequential stuff.

[@brunodemiremont1201]

😳 Why not? Still, enroll in some pronunciation course, there’s a long way to the port.

[@chrishadley147]

Love how your videos are directed towards Americans!! Most anglophone speakers you'll find in France are British such as those with CdS or maison secondarie. Really useful videos though especially for social situations.

[@briseboy]

The discussion is interesting, as a US native i do NOT engage in aimless or unfocused conversation, or concerning emotional responses over issues over which one has no capacity to modify. (Never since first memory) A salon is of course not small talk, nor are seminars by actual competents who are not interested in solicitation for profit.

[@briseboy]

In fact the typical online French or Spanish lesson is boring, due to its being entirely the "small talk" so denied by the video uploader here.

[@jusufagung]

"Hi Jean! Did you talk with Andy?" "O yes, I did. It was a nice small talk." "Alright, what did you talk about?" "Well, I asked how he is, he replied that he is fine, and I said that it's nice to meet him, and we said goodbye." " ..... "

[@Fugazinome]

Moved to the US 58 years ago,and up to this day i’m not really comfortable with small talk.There were instances where some people got offended by my lack of engagement,so I try now,but it doesn’t come easy as for me it’s not natural.

[@slowlearner4341]

Merci Géraldine. C'était intéressant et pourrait être utile; bien mieux que de garder le silence dans l'ascenseur. Les soi-disant "fillers" (je ne sais pas l'équivalent français). Joyeux Noël et bonne année.

[@marcelvincent3182]

What you say is very true generally speaking for the country, but it's totally untrue for the region " Hauts de France " , Nord Pas de Calais, people in this region love small talk and most of them practice small talk on a daily basis , and they dare to do it even with strangers, but they'll do it even more with the people they meet during the day. That's one of the reason why the so called Ch'tis give to other French people this impression of openness and warm attitude towards others and towards life in general, i'm a parisian , i have traveled inside the country in most parts of the country, i have never witnessed in any other parts of the country such an ability and natural love for small talk like in the Région Nord Pas de Calais, i love their attitude, also they do not like to complain , which is also quite a big difference with the rest of the country haha

[@GrumpyYank26]

I lived a Paris ily a trente ans… at that time i understood it was impolite to ask ‘qu’est ques vous fait dans la vie?’ Is that not true any more?? Love your channel ❤

[@learnfrenchwithmeme5944]

if you are invited to a party and there are many people maybe you could ask someone sitting next to you but it wouldn't be the most appropriate question in order to engage a conversation. I would choose to sit next to someone as lonely as me and ask something like "Do you know xx for long ?" If the person knows nobody and seems to be willing to talk then i would continue with " how did you meet ? " and then ask questions according to his or her answer.

[@300books]

I've heard that Norwegians are like that too. They don't make small talk with strangers, but will with people they know.

[@cyruschang1904]

Voici la définition de bavarder sur le site du Larousse : parler abondamment de choses sans grande portée C'est exactement ce que l'on appelle small talk ou chit-chat en anglais

[@charlesstaudt2077]

EXCELLENT DEAR 👏 CHARLES STAUDT FROM BRAZIL 🇧🇷

[@cynthiarunge4858]

I have learned that o need to small talk Business and high society ...it is a must But you cannot be in silence forever I am a shy reserved ...I must learn to small gosh No ever talk about personal things! That is not small talk

[@Lightw81]

Every nationality has a skewed view of themselves. That's why travel is so beneficial.

[@keouine]

All of a sudden I recall another KZbin channel episode that spoke about so many young students both male and female who find it very difficult or impossible to make any friends in some European cities. Maybe more openness wouldn't necessarily unravel the fabric of culture.

[@cameliap1146]

Géraldine, est- ce que vous avez bien compris ce que le " small talk" veut dire ??

[@chrismathis4162]

I’m an American, but one of the few who despises small talk. I avoid it at all costs. J’étais français dans une autre vie.

[@marthaangus6068]

As an interior designer buying antiques in Paris over many decades I find the opposite. We are expected to greet the dealer with Bonjour, ca va? etc. In the US we get right to the work to be done no waste of time with pleasantries.

[@lavinder11]

Right. I find French to be more social in that aspect. People should define what small talk is before saying who engages in what. Americans tend to be friendly in that we can have an engaging conversation with strangers and part ways without a second thought. Whereas - in my experience - French do the polite chatter to keep social peace.

[@georgina3358]

@@lavinder11 I agree with you. The definition of small talk differs according to culture, where you live and what you have been brought up to do.

[@dezafinado]

The lack of stringent social etiquette and formality in the US is sometimes viewed as a lack of culture by foreigners who come from older cultures (Europe, Asia). But for many, it's refreshing because you aren't required to do the verbal dance.

[@missmo3451]

She does say at the start of the video about having made a broad generalization..

[@DelfinaKS]

You do a good job on explaining stereotypes and the existence of exceptions. Nevertheless, I don't like this aversion to small talk. I mean like there are some days we have a lot going on and would like to be left in silence but in general i thought all human beings like to try to connect. I don't know why that would be generally unacceptable to French. I am also curious if this observations are relevant to all French speaking people, or only to those from European France? For example, what are the attitudes of French Canadians to small talk?

[@j.colman6484]

Very lively and engaging as always, but I don't know why the lady refers to the American approach to small talk -- not all students of French are American and want to be lumped in with them.

[@mgparis]

In the US, strangers would tell me: "Hey, nice earrings" or "Those are cool earrings!" In France, I once complimented a stranger: "Excuse me madam, sorry to bother you, but may I say that your earrings look very nice on you?"

[@leeann6662]

And what did she say?

[@mgparis]

@@leeann6662 She was startled I spoke to her, then she said thank you :)

[@300books]

In France a person doesn't usually address a total stranger just to remark on something they're wearing, because it's sort of like invading their private space, so they find it awkward and strange. Although, once you know the person, they won't mind a compliment.

[@mgparis]

@@300books I know, I'm French :) I just wanted to compare the two experiences

[@cameliap1146]

@@300books in other places either. Come on ! Who on the earth stop you on the street/ mall/ restaurant...to tell you how nice is your skirt/ earing/ 👜...

[@leematthews6812]

Well, I can't speak for all Brits, but 'Le silence, c'est du respect' sounds just fine to me. I'm certainly not one who has to have his ear glued to the phone all the time!

[@shyft09]

I do I agree with this video but in comparison to Londoners, Parisiens are quite chatty and relaxed. Having moved from London to Paris, I find Londoners are more reserved / quiet / shy in the presence of strangers (unless we're drunk)

[@chateaudelamotte9527]

In France you do small talk all the time and I am so tiered of it, it leads to nothing, nothing at all!!

[@UrsaBella]

it is like this but in french..it is raining hard...oh yes, it is raining...so much rain..yes, today is a rainy day...yes, they promised a rainy day yesterday...just pouring now...and so on and so forth...mind numbing...

[@jangguttok7437]

i hv visited france few times.. wanting silence and not wanting to talk to strangers are 2 different things yes in a way, mybe french don’t like small talk, but based on my visit, they DEFINITELY not silent. even Parisian can be loud when they want to mybe i shud go again n try to see it after watching this video

[@pomelotree2]

I’ve got the feeling that the definition of “small talk” is wrong here…I use small talk as an introducción when socialising, sometimes it evolves in an interesting conversation sometimes does not… this is one way you make good friends…one of the best conversation I had was on a train, on a 2 hour trip with an old lady that started with the underestimated small talk… do not underestimate small talk is all about communication…

[@Cipricus]

Oh, I see that my comment is very similar to many others here. One person says: "I don’t think Geraldine understands what small talk is." 😆

[@johnc3094]

« Tu fais quoi dans la vie ? » I’ve always been told that this is very impolite, since it seems to ask “how much money do you make?”. Maybe things have loosened up since I studied French.

[@mortendahl6419]

French people small talk all the time, they just make it sound deep because they think so highly of themselves

[@cameliap1146]

😅 true ! Small talk ...c' est monnaie courante !

[@TheMalcolmPowder]

It is not respect, it is courtesy, know the difference

[@wendywestley5528]

Très intéressant. Je pensais que les français n’étaient pas très amiables, en fait, un peu distants. Merci pour l’information.

[@naderzekrya5238]

You're generally not wrong

[@FlavourlessLife]

Last week I casually asked a French guy whom I've spoken with 3 or 4 times, "Hi Joseph, how are you, how is your week going?" and he frowned and said "yes... okay... are we ready to start?". It was a business call and we were waiting for others to join. Did I commit a faux pas?

[@lavinder11]

Really? French people love small talking with me. Or maybe it's because they know I'm American and assume that I want to talk to them. Anyway, French do the polite hello how are you to promote a good social atmosphere whereas Americans tend to bypass all of that to get down to business. What we do is have personal conversations with strangers without a second thought. If this is how you define small talk, then yeah Americans do this a lot. I find it nice how we strike up conversations with no expectation for it to go anywhere. It's just a pleasant social interaction in the moment.

[@amyjacquelineg.715]

Small talk in the states can be draining. 😞

[@mariawerner8447]

This goes for all Northern Europeans (I’m Swedish)

[@Kat-V]

I clicked the video in horror that I may have committed some faux pas in France just to find out that this is mostly aimed towards US-Americans lol I'm good

[@Waldvogel45]

you could work on your pron of words such as "southern", or "adjective", "elevator." "philosophers". hairdressers. Usually stress errors. Otherwise very interesting.

[@Jonathan24500]

I’m an American who has lived in France for24 years. It’s true the French do not engage In small talk unless they are very close to you. On the opposite side, most Brits I know love small talk. Especially when it’s a chance to gossip or moan. Any where, any time. There are a few Brits who stay to themselves for the most part, but this is definitely an exception to the rule.

[@lautoka63]

I'm a Kiwi who's lived in the UK and France. The Brits don't do small talk that much, but the French less so until they know you well. Cultures vary; I've spent a lot of time in the US and they are more inclined to make small talk. Perfectly pleasant people all of them; there are just variations between nations, which makes travel interesting.

[@tashawilliams1366]

She seems to have some confusion about what small talk is for English speakers. In USA, small talk is not sharing personal details with a stranger, but closer to the the french" parler de tout et du rien." If you know really someone, small talk can extend to "échanger des banalitiés. Otherwise, small talk is only weather, fashion, non controversial current events, maybe a little joke (like when the elevator gets crowded), or a simply "how is everyone today" to which everyone lies and says "Fine" or "Ok" and maybe shares what they are on their way to do.

[@learnfrenchwithmeme5944]

I believe there is small talk otherwise i would have never talked with people on parties where i knew nobody. What did we talk about ? uninteresting things but a lot of jokes as well. When i meet my neighbours (it took a few months) we do small talk now: weather, how prices went up, how is their dog doing, how was christmas ... But there are things we have to be careful like making compliments to one another, it's not easy.It can make the person feel really ashamed if people are around (a new haircut for example, i told a woman i loved her new haircut when no one was around. A client made a compliment to me in front of everybody (an english man) and i was very red and wanted to hide. He was a bit strange too as he was insisting and me not responding as i didn't know what to say. So awkward.

[@ajs41]

I think most British people are closer to the French on this subject. Americans can be irritating sometimes in the way they always have to do small talk. Also, when British people do engage in small talk, it tends to be about non-personal things, which is why it's common for British people to be talking to each other in a pub for a long time without ever knowing the name of the other person they're talking to.

[@michaelcrummy8397]

Or maybe they’re just very pissed.

[@Marcel_Audubon]

generalize much, sweetie?

[@fabulously695]

Speak for yourself please 😊. I small talk incessantly equally wether I’m in in England and France equally, I’m a British born French person.

[@7135HOLLY]

It’s more irritating that you missed the point of this video. I’m American and personally hate small talk but it is what is. Your generalizations of Americans and any other group is rude, ignorant, and stupid. Cheers!

[@Edabee405]

I’m a Brit who’s lived in the US for many years and it’s a fact that in general, Americans engage in much more small talk with strangers than Brits do. For example, in a lift/elevator in England, it’s normally considered intrusive and feels highly uncomfortable for someone to try to start small talking. In an elevator in the U.S., it’s the opposite - to remain silent causes discomfort.

[@igaluitchannel6644]

French talk all the time, constantly.

[@Teri_Berk]

Alain Delon movies of the late 60's and early 70's are a prime example of the French not doing any small talk.

[@janetmackinnon3411]

Je parle le français assez courrement---mais chez nous je trouve la petite nuance...merci bien.

[@AlloBruxelles]

In French upper middle and upper class, you NEVER leave a "temps mort". Silence is anathema in French "polite" society.

[@helenamoniqueclarke8135]

Cultural norms exist. Some people need to learn that here. No worries.❤️🇫🇷

[@JohnKaman]

Vous avez raison; les Américains ont peur de silence.

[@josephciolino2865]

Common topics appropriate when in France: 1. How to hide from invading German forces. 2. How to collaborate with members of those forces. 3. How to welcome invaders of any kind whether armies of soldiers or immigrants bent on destroying French culture. 4. How to collaborate with the enemy, betraying your countrymen and allies while claiming to be overwhelming protective of your culture. Right.

[@UrsaBella]

hilarious

[@johnwright6102]

Toward the end of this video, I was surprised by the amount of "tutoyer". Isn't that rather informal and impolite unless you are well acquainted with the person? I know of young brides who wait months for their in-laws to give permission to use "toi". Perhaps a video on this subject would be helpful.

[@maiwelsh8025]

I am curious. Is there an exception to this rule when women go to hairdressers?

[@rexholy1736]

What country is yr American friend from?

[@_djsport]

I start to follow you for learning French. Can you please speak less English en more French. The ideal will be using the English occasionally. Instead of using English to explain, use French with English subtitle. Just a suggestion. Thanks for your work and efforts.

[@michaelcrummy8397]

There are lots of French language blogs out there too.

[@Marcel_Audubon]

Yeah, tell her how to run her own channel, why don't you? smh

[@horatiodreamt]

I thought "small talk" was conversation using words with two syllables or less.

[@monikaparmar2061]

How to say "You just lost the world cup!" in French.

[@paules3437]

2:43: Si "le silence = le respect," je vous présente Cyrano, qui condamne son ami LeBret, toujours entouré d'"une foule" d'amis, qui, à l'avis de Cyrano, ne valent rien. Celui-ci, il préfère les ennemies--dangereux, peut-être, mais au moins honnêtes! Cyrano: À force de vous voir vous faire des amis, Et rire à ces amis dont vous avez des foules, D’une bouche empruntée au derrière des poules ! J’aime raréfier sur mes pas les saluts, Et m’écrie avec joie : un ennemi de plus ! Le Bret: Quelle aberration ! Cyrano: Eh bien ! oui, c’est mon vice. Déplaire est mon plaisir. J’aime qu’on me haïsse. Mon cher, si tu savais comme l’on marche mieux Sous la pistolétade excitante des yeux ! Comme, sur les pourpoints, font d’amusantes taches Le fiel des envieux et la bave des lâches ! - Vous, la molle amitié dont vous vous entourez, Ressemble à ces grands cols d’Italie, ajourés Et flottants, dans lesquels votre cou s’effémine : On y est plus à l’aise… et de moins haute mine, Car le front n’ayant pas de maintien ni de loi, S’abandonne à pencher dans tous les sens. Mais moi, La Haine, chaque jour, me tuyaute et m’apprête La fraise dont l’empois force à lever la tête ; Chaque ennemi de plus est un nouveau godron Qui m’ajoute une gêne, et m’ajoute un rayon : Car, pareille en tous points à la fraise espagnole, La Haine est un carcan, mais c’est une auréole ! (Trans by Brian Hooker): Watching you other people making friends Everywhere-as a dog makes friends! I mark The manner of these canine courtesies And think: "My friends are of a cleaner breed; Here comes-thank God!-another enemy!" Le Bret But this is madness! Cyrano Method, let us say. It is my pleasure to displease. I love Hatred. Imagine how it feels to face The volley of a thousand angry eyes- The bile of envy and the froth of fear Spattering little drops about me- You- Good nature all around you, soft and warm- You are like those Italians, in great cowls Comfortable and loose- Your chin sinks down Into the folds, your shoulders droop. But I- The Spanish ruff I wear around my throat Is like a ring of enemies; hard, proud, Each point another pride, another thorn- So that I hold myself erect perforce Wearing the hatred of the common herd Haughtily, the harsh collar of Old Spain, At once a fetter and-a halo!

[@David_10157]

"When talking culture, you have to generalize." lol

[@eddyvos2628]

It is true though.

[@jaykilborn2508]

As an American, living in France, it was hard for me to get used to the idea that the French don't really talk to strangers. When my French wife and I were in the States and someone would hear her speaking english with a French accent, they would comment about their trip to France. That doesn't happen over here. Even at the boulangerie, where I buy a baguette, it is always strictly business. Another thing I learned was that the French don't say "bonjour" to strangers, so I stopped doing that. Onetime we were on the metro when a woman sat facing us. I said bonjour and she asked "Do I know you?". My wife had to explain to her that I am an American.

[@jackiedragonfly2461]

Wow, so interesting that that is you experience! I live in the south/central France, and here you are supposed to say "Bonjour" to EVERYONE befor you continue - asking where the cheese section is in a shop, to any and all clercs, to everybody. It is the lack of "Bonjour" that pisses them off, that makes you seem rude and intitled!

[@jaykilborn2508]

@@jackiedragonfly2461 Over here, when I talk to a clerk, I say bonjour and end the conversation with merci and bonne après-midi. In America, if I see a woman on the street, I might say hi. In France, that is not done.

[@jackiedragonfly2461]

@@jaykilborn2508 Wow, I guess there is France and France then - and I ended up in the good part😆. Here in Dordogne you say hello (bonjour) to practically everyone you pass, it is considered bad manners to not greet a passing stranger in the park with a hello, and if your dogs happen to stop and sniff each other's butts, you will usually be saying "bon balade" (have a nice walk) or "bonne journée" (have a nice day) to eachother as you walk away. Super polite all the way...

[@jaykilborn2508]

@@jackiedragonfly2461 I live in Brittany and we don't talk to strangers much here. About the only time where we talk to strangers is when we enter a salle d'attente of a doctor"s office. Then we say bonjour to the people waiting to see the doctor.

[@KateOBrienCreative]

As others have said, it really depends what part of France you live in. In more regional areas it's considered rude *not* to say bonjour as you pass others in the street.

[@cat_city2009]

I love how Europeans don't do small talk. In the US you're expected to make conversation about nothing all the time or you're considered weird and unfriendly.