Gatekeeping/Bullying in the Roller Skating Community (Stop Hatin’ On The Beginner Roller Skaters!!)

[@daliahness]

This is why I no longer attend the local rink. I just want to skate without hate!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

That’s all I want for real!

[@krystapope9130]

My sister clued me in to a great mind over matter saying and I practice it every day. It goes like this: “ I don’t mind, because you don’t matter”. I will say that to myself (and a lot of times over and over) any time I come across anyone who wants to pick on me for doing some thing in a way that they think I should be doing differently, roller skating or otherwise. I very much think that if people can’t say anything nice they should definitely not say anything at all. If it feels good and “ right” to you, and you’re being safe, then it should be OK. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve actually locked in a new trick simply because I accidentally “stumbled” upon it and I’m sure I didn’t do it correctly! It doesn’t matter to me because it’s MY roller skating journey. Not mine and random people I don’t know. And if someone goes out of their way to tell someone they’re doing something wrong or bullies them or anything else negative like that, it’s really because they are deflecting whatever it is they find wrong with themselves. Nobody on this planet is perfect. None of us really get it fully right every day but as long as we keep trying and keep being kind and loving to those around us, we can all be a little more successful with rollerskating (and basic human kindness.) I love this channel and I’ll keep watching!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Spot on with the idea of people deflecting and projecting their own insecurities onto others when they feel the need to be rude - that’s so real

[@AMVRebirth]

Best believe, if there's a community for it, there's gatekeeping within it. I've heard people bullying even in the ASMR community which is insane to me. It's all ego & yes it makes people put down whatever hobby they enjoyed before that person came along and made them feel bad about it.

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

It’s really a shame! There is plenty of room for all different types of ASMR artists - and you’re right, there are unfortunately gatekeepers in every community. I wish it were different

[@oliviah.4741]

As a black beginner skater, I’ve had mixed experiences. There are some ppl that were welcoming with their stories/tips and I’ve met some ppl that was not so nice… like, “you skate so stiff and you need to learn to relax etc.” and “you’ve been skating for almost a yr and that’s all you’ve learned?!” I went into skating to get away from my depression and it worked. But lately I have been so discouraged at my progress bc I’m a single mom who lost my job and going thru hard times. I haven’t practiced as often as I should. But I just have to tune them out at the rink and remember to have fun ❤

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Wow thanks for sharing this. I’m sorry that you’ve experienced some of the negativity that people can bring to skating. I still get discouraged at my progress honestly most days! I don’t have kids so I can’t imagine having to carry all that. Having FUN is absolutely the most important thing! I hope you have been able to get out there again 😊

[@cfrost87]

Everyone learns at their own pace and thats ok.

[@A_JoshOfAllTrades]

Those skate dancers who call people "posers" for augmenting a move to work for them must not have much creativity. Everybody doesn't do things the same. Its what makes us human.

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Absolutely! 💯

[@pinsandneedles3]

Hey! This is a great video and an important topic to talk about. I'm glad you are tackling it 💕 Bullying sucks in general but I think it *especially* sucks in hobbies we do to have fun and thus expect to leave us feeling good. I am very much a beginner rollerskater (got my first pair of skates summer '22 and only managed to get out and use them a handful of times - depression sucks) and I live in a country where rollerskating is a fairly uncommon hobby so I haven't come across these issues IRL. I have definitely noticed them online though. I see a lot of similarities between this and the negative attitudes a lot of hiking communities have. Especially with regards to the unsolicited advice that feels like it's more about inflating the ego of the person giving the advice than it is about any true solidarity between two people with the same hobby. In hiking, and especially long distance hiking, so many people are obsessed with *their* choice of ultralight and ultraexpensive gear, and will often talk crap about more accessible options. You just sort of immediately end up feeling like a second-grade hiker if you can't afford the latest thing everyone swears by. This honestly feels ridiculous to me, as I personally view hiking as a way of connecting with nature and my own body, not some sort of materialistic game... Hiking communities try to curb this issue by spreading the HYOH philosophy: Hike Your Own Hike. The principle is very similar to the thinking behind your channel name - which I love btw! Not sure if I have a broader point to this comment. I'm just tired of hobby elitism bullying beginners out of spaces they want to be in 😔😔

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thanks for sharing this comment! First off, congrats on recently starting on your roller skating journey. It’s hard to try a new thing especially when you don’t have in person support, on top of struggling with mental health. This is why online communities are so beneficial and important, and can be wonderful. Also it can ruin someone’s experience if they come across the “hobby elitism” you mention. The HYOH philosophy is definitely the same idea I have when roller skating, and I’ve also seen some discouraging discourse where skaters with better or more expensive gear put others down. Even when the intention behind the criticism isn’t meant to be unkind to the newbie, it often comes across harsh and jarring to someone new just trying it out and wanting to have fun. For this reason I removed myself from certain Facebook groups because there was so much bullying - almost every post for a time was a new skater expressing that they are scared of asking questions or sharing progress videos to the group for fear of the snobs. I hope you can continue skating and hiking at your own pace, and know it’s okay to take breaks for your mental health. I also get down on myself at times when I want to take a break but it’s perfectly fine to come back to a hobby now and then and doing this doesn’t make you any less valid than someone doing the activity every day. Take care! 😁💥

[@bluejean500]

both hiker & roller skater here. 🙋🏻‍♀️ i hike my own hike & roll my own way & believe everyone should do so. i backed away from the skating community right after i started because of some gatekeeping drama i happened upon (🙄). i’m also a hooper, & backed away from that community for the same reason. i just do my own thing & am happier for it. 🙂

[@nancystalik6828]

You are really such a good person. Thank you!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thank you so much for these kind words - it really means a lot. And thank you for watching 💥

[@osaze61]

Hate/bullying will never end, but you can choose to ignore. If you respond, it validates the crazy.....Live On, Live Strong!!!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Absolutely right. Best to ignore 👏🏽👏🏽

[@RKKY-mf7fe]

Sorry to hear this. The community up here in Toronto is literally sunshine rainbows and carebears. Anyways keep up your tutorials, I find them very useful thanks.

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thanks so much - I wanna come to Toronto! 😁💥

[@isapisa]

I enjoy your videos because you describe things very clearly.

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thank you, I really appreciate that!

[@BigThumpSC]

Ok, so it isn't just me seeing it. Amazing because the "little cliques" weird me out and honestly look weak. Like bruh y'all are just skaters fam ease up cause ya not like that off of the skate floor 😂. Let beginners learn and enjoy the process man. After I noticed it here, I just go and don't speak to most people. I skate because my son asked me to go and it became fun. Self proclaimed professionals in those cliques are weird. Other ppl in there are alright tho. 😂😂💯 Great video!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

So true! Just glad I’m not alone in feeling the frustrations with the skate community sometimes. Overall good experiences, but the bad ones can be so discouraging to newbies if it’s their first impression!!

[@TysShoeDesign-k9m]

Wow! I never knew this was a thing in the roller skating community. I am over 50 (closer to 60), over weight and a beginner skater, yet I never ran into bullying in the skating community. I have also skated with every style of skater and everyone has been sooooooo supportive. It is a shame you have to deal with this. You certainly have helped me a lot with your videos. THANK YOU. Just keep on doing YOU. As a shoe designer, I dealt with bullying in the beginning of my career. I have been a shoe strass (bling) artist since 2012 so, I don't get it as much now. When I started, I would always wonder why such advanced, successful artists worried so much about me and what I am doing. It was a bit shocking but, I learned to ignore the negativity and do me. Most of it comes from jealously. Glad bullying did not discourage you. Skate On!!! :)

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thanks for your comment! Oh absolutely it’s true what you said about people bullying out of envy/jealousy. It’s especially weird when people who are very “successful” bully me because it’s like cmon, at least pick on someone your own size 🤪 some people hate seeing small artists/creators succeed. It’s gross but I’m trying to focus on the good parts of the community while addressing problematic things in small doses so I don’t get too discouraged.

[@TysShoeDesign-k9m]

@@WheelYourOwnWay Good to hear they did not discourage you! I found that ignoring bullies hurt them most. They thrive on reactions from you. Keep doing you. You are a beautiful skater. Really graceful. Very encouraging! Have a great evening. :)

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thank you so much ☺️

[@kaylarainey4380]

Sending you love! I cannot view the video though :(

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Oh that’s strange, does it say why?

[@pinsandneedles3]

Odd. I have no issues!

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Thank you for letting me know

[@kaylarainey4380]

I am now able to view the video. Idk what was going on before.

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Ahh great to hear 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@808nats]

Thanks for sharing. I think since everyone is different and they skate differently, it’s important to see many different ways, styles, and breakdowns or instructions because not everyone can imitate every skill the way they’re “supposed to”. We all walk differently, so we should all be able to skate differently. We’re not robots. 🛼 💕😊

[@WheelYourOwnWay]

Yes very well said 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 I completely agree!