#genx

[@KingofgraceSARA]

"We basically got old around some people" - I just did a scream-laugh.

[@KW-kr9gh]

It is so TRUE!!! 😂

[@KhadijahW.]

This is how I will now describe my childhood!!!

[@changeisgood5484]

Fr Fr because that’s how it really was 😂😂😂😂

[@jamiparrish8806]

Same

[@tombstoneranch69]

Exact same, we really were on our own. and it was awesome.

[@SoftChroma]

How each generation deals with grief: boomers- what grief? Gen X- not today Millennials- hi grief, I see you Gen Z- I’m already in therapy 😅

[@missybradburn5776]

TOTALLY!!!! 🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯

[@vanessabarreras2958]

We dealt with grief by going to work and getting through the day because we had rent to pay. Most of us considered it a grief day by calling out of our second job so we can go to the bar for drink (by the way it never came with an umbrella and rarely with juice added)

[@theaterofsouls]

hahahahahha

[@kateliven2084]

Gen z? Most of them are high or confused . Mental issues in gen z are the highest

[@BozeDoesGodsWork]

@@kateliven2084All thanks to the people who raised us. Who also didn’t know what the hell they were doing.

[@ChiKitty24]

This "Gen X is feral" series is so relatable. I feel like I just walked in on a support group and you are my people. 😂

[@otakumagnet8106]

Boomers considered it a duty to be parents, not a joy or gift. The requirements were minimal. Food, shelter, and a beating a week after you got in trouble, when they finally found out. Lol Nearly every GenX'r I know, myself included, say the same thing "Move, I'll do it myself... -sigh...-".

[@ShaneCamburn80]

A week!? Wow! You had it easy... 😂

[@ShaneCamburn80]

My dad striped me every day, even when I was good, he'd say, "this is for whatever you did that I didn't see," or "for what you might have done." 😂

[@PayneToTheMax]

Typical Gen X'ers whining about others for their poor parenting skills. Lazy generation who would rather be 'friends' with their zoomer kids than actual parents, and never taking blame for their poor parenting skills. I'm a 34 year old who teaches zoomers and has to deal with shitty Gen X parents constantly. Oh, and I was raised by boomers, so there goes the theory that they're to blame for Gen X's issues 😅

[@EmpressAshe]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 Yes 😪

[@tomikiawells6780]

At 55, so true. Trying to let my grandchildren do for themselves but my children ha, they still need to move aside 🥹.

[@JoanneGrace11]

Gen x here! Everything you are saying is the truth. Total emotional neglect, but it made for some strong, independent people with unique views on life. Peace🦋

[@rontreald]

And the other 90% on drugs started gangs and pumped drugs into our communities. I hear a lot of people from that generation blame it on others but honestly y’all could have said no and real shit y’all did the same thing except y’all were way more vicious. And say millennials are the problem no y’all are we got made fun of when we looked for help and got told we are bad parents because we showed love to our kids and didn’t want to beat them. Y’all created some fucked up kids and blame it on everyone and expect sympathy yes boomers stole all the wealth but you mfs created this from the 80s till the late 90s. Gen X single handily fucked up America and then blamed it on your children so yeah live with that.

[@joselynnschmidt5795]

Or just narcissist making you think that they are strong, independent, and unique people. Narcissist becomes narcissist from emotional neglect as a child. This isn't good and no one is really strong. It's a lie from narcissist.

[@traviswall1982]

@@joselynnschmidt5795 Aw, did someone learn a new word recently and wanted to look smart using it, just used it incorrectly? How adorable.

[@joselynnschmidt5795]

@@traviswall1982 1. I am 18. 2. You have no idea how much I learned about narcissism. 3. You have no idea about my home life. My grandpa is a narcissist. Maybe you should do some research.

[@traviswall1982]

@@joselynnschmidt5795 I 100% know how much you know about narcissism because you used it incorrectly in a sentence. Grammer and sentence structure was your downfall and everyone your age likes to use big words to come off knowing more than you do. It is the Mark Twain thing about being young and thinking you are right about everything. We were there one time in our life too.

[@barbarasimoneau5718]

You are spot on about emotional neglect! They also didn't believe in "feelings" or mental health care.

[@MillenZaLPhA]

Ironic part, my moms a nurse, and my dads side from from “healthcare workers” and no one figured it the fuhck out

[@MG________]

We had the.opposite problem due to a mentally ill father...therein lay the problem. He was a fkn nasty prick. I learned nothing.from him. I made the choice to disregard him from childhood. Guy was/is a wimp. Paranoid schizophrenic...or as I call them: Idiots. Or loserphrenics.

[@Padilla-81]

yes, hahaha they don’t believe in feelings. it’s considered crying for nothing if we weren’t t crying blood 😩

[@EmpressAshe]

Exactlyy Smhh

[@EmpressAshe]

​@@Padilla-81 Girlll you got that part

[@uscitizen1035]

Boomers told us, "Cry and I'll give you something to cry about!" while they spanked us. Then when they finished spanking us, they said, "clean up your face" meaning go wash your tear stained face.

[@christinasapp9726]

I definitely heard that a lot. I remember one time in third grade, I said that I was scared and my step-father said "I'll give you a spanking and then that'll give you a reason to be scared". I felt very humiliated, angry, and invalidated when he said that. He used to lock me out of the house and would humiliate me all the time.

[@quentinbarrentine5114]

That, in and of itself, is proof that most abusive parents KNOW they're being hurtful and abusive. The fact that they didn't do that shit out in public, and made us "clean up our face," after crying from getting beaten. They knew damn well what they were doing and had sense enough to keep it behind closed doors.

[@Amanda-r5z]

Preach

[@ShaneCamburn80]

My dad didn't say anything other than "assume the position," which meant strip and bend over the foot board of my bed, he'd then take off his belt and stripe me like a zebra... 😂

[@Justsomebodyelse235]

@@ShaneCamburn80That’s not funny that is terrible and I’m sorry you had to be beaten like that. I too come from a household of corporal punishment but we were NEVER told to strip. We got it in whatever we had on unless naked and then my parents would wait until after your showered and dressed to catch you when you were least expecting it.

[@jhurt3824]

Gen x here. Couldn't agree more. Our parents let us raise ourselves and it's the reason we're are so resilient. I worked in counseling for 20 years. Gen x'ers much more likely to feel alone. Because they have had to do so many things alone. Most of my friends are pretty intolerant to boomers for this reason. My whole neighborhood of kids were latchkey and we were all working by 12-13. Buying our own clothes by 16. Not because our parents couldn't. Not because they wanted to teach us lessons that contributed to our growth. Because they are a selfish and self involved generation. Now obviously this isn't all of them.

[@Hollywoodbearluv]

My mom was busy getting a nurse job, getting her hair and nails done, buying muscle cars, and going out all the time. To this day she’ll say she worked all the time and deserved a little fun. She’d forget to buy groceries for a few weeks and never forgot to make her Avon orders.

[@ShaneCamburn80]

All the ones I knew... lol

[@yiddena]

Exactly! Yes, to all. Working by 14, buying my own clothes etc.

[@khrisi9410]

Many weren't selfish in a malevolent kind of way though. Many Parents had to work and ride buses to work daily, it was exhausting so they gave us the tools to be independent, beat common sense into us, whooped correction into us so they could focus on working, providing, and protecting.

[@kimerietate8372]

Born 1970.Both my parents had master’s degrees in Education, and they never once asked me how my day at school was, what I wanted to be when I grew up, or talked about college with me.I had to figure it out myself.

[@AfroLatina3]

😮🫢

[@sxynomi]

You're parents sound like selfish people.

[@Cuvoastoh6321]

Bet you did well!

[@theskyizblue2day431]

That’s fucking crazy lol but my story isn’t far off, either

[@donnaw8279]

Literally ALL of this.

[@rata-pk4bw]

Boomers can't stand criticism

[@BryanMark-mw8sz]

yet deserve so much

[@MyCatsChannel841]

They blame us for everything 😂tell us to work harder 😂

[@Fsrjtyttzma]

“They” …Yes find someone to blame for your own failings. Someone on the internet decided to categorise entire generations of people into one set of listed behavioural traits and you people all believe it. You believed it because you have no mind of your own. Your stupidity is beyond comprehension.

[@PayneToTheMax]

Actually, this criticism applies just as well to Gen X parents. Lazy generation who would rather be 'friends' with their zoomer kids than actual parents, and never taking blame for their poor parenting skills. I'm a 34 year old who teaches zoomers and has to deal with shitty Gen X parents constantly. Oh, and I was raised by boomers, so there goes the theory that they're to blame for Gen X's issues 😅

[@jacydyer5489]

Right? They've never made a mistake nor been wrong, in their whole lives. Know-It-All Genuises!

[@Redtady]

Gen x'er here. I always called it benign neglect. I loved the freedom at the time but looking back I really needed caring adults.

[@jhenecanody8472]

Yes! So much freedom, but a total lack of direction.

[@jhenecanody8472]

Completely spot on, every point. Also interesting that the socioeconomic status didn’t affect how involved they were. The wealthy ones just “threw money at the problem.” Thanks for an insightful and validating video.

[@cyndrellawhitley7062]

I wouldn't trade the freedom for anything personally. 😅 loved it

[@d.shannon261]

That hits hard. I homeschooled my kids just to keep them from doing what I did. 😂

[@Augustbeauty69]

@@d.shannon261 I thought it was just me.

[@fluffymajestic8656]

“They don’t feel responsible for your emotional well being.” AMEN!!! Gosh this is so true. They would come home and scream at the kids, terrorize us for being in the way, curse at us for not appreciating how many hours they worked (when we were 5 years old), and expect accolades for giving us good and shelter. They would hit us just because they were mad and sleep perfectly well at night. It’s crazy. Great post!!

[@mytherapistlife]

Thank you!

[@ladym7852]

Hahaha foreal! Hahahahaha

[@christinasapp9726]

Sounds like what I went through.

[@monkeyloven]

so true.

[@lela888]

Spot on

[@bronzedrage]

That is the TRUTH! My parents were very involved when I was growing up but my emotional well being NEVER crossed their minds. In fact; they were the ones contributing THE MOST to my childhood emotional instability.

[@eklektikTechno]

It wasn’t that bad 😁, we are the MTV Generation and Golden Age of video gaming so yea we did a lot on our own but a lot of us also had adults in our lives mentoring guiding us etc.. Being Gen X is a badge of honor we literally shaped Pop Culture that the Generations now just recycle and reboot. I feel extremely fortunate to be an X 🙏🏽 we’re not some broken Generation

[@Hodad3000]

I had one occasional parent. Neglect is the generous version.

[@divergence_tiffanyramos4337]

I refer to boomers as the natsistic generation. It wasn't only our parents it was the whole of adult society. Even government only thought of it self and how could they benefit personally. We're feeling those affects now. Someone actually did a study and wrote about the boomer generation and their narcissistic personality traits and how it's affected our world. What's really eye opening is our parent's being reminded through t.v. programming "it's 10:00pm do you know where your children are?" That's crazy, but it was common place in our world at that time. We were the " children shall be seen and not heard" generation. We were thrown into the deep end of the pool unassisted and instructed to sink or swim. We learned to swim really fast. We learned to self-soothe and navigate life on our own. It made us the people we are today, but sometimes I wish our parent's would've given us just a little more attention than they did.

[@rachelsweets]

Thank you for this

[@divergence_tiffanyramos4337]

@@rachelsweets : Your most certianly welcome. 😁 I truly hope your doing well and healing from any trauma you endured. Much love and many blessings sent your way. 💜

[@ineedhoez]

And the Next Generation overcorrected by being helicopter parents and coddling their children. Now the kids are high anxiety can't function can't cope, and have zero resilience.

[@_greybones925]

Amen 🙌

[@endofsociety]

One lady said something so true. Parents wanted to have you, but not see you. 😂😂😂😂😂

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

I’m not sure they wanted to have us… they just didn’t have a choice

[@endofsociety]

@@ultravioletpisces3666 true abortion wasn’t a popular thing, but giving them up and or abandoning them was

[@sharonsmalls6846]

I am a baby boomer I stopped my birth control for over a year to become pregnant. I am apologizing to my Generation X daughter and Generation Z granddaughter for my dysfunctions.

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

@@endofsociety or just keeping them and … continuing to do whatever. But also… I realize… they had ZERO instruction. They had little to no understanding of child development. They didn’t KNOW that cigarettes where cancer causing. They didn’t know how common child abduction was. There was no awareness of… practically anything that seems obvious now. Or like… we can’t be mad they didn’t make us wear seatbelts. Cars often didn’t have them. The car seats that existed weren’t that great. And weren’t really made for kids age birth to age 7 for sure…

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

@@endofsociety also, it was a thing that women were *expected* to have children but given no support and no education. It was taboo to talk about anything bad about being a parent (or any negative feelings you had) so you either thought you were terrible or your kids were when everything wasn’t perfect.

[@user-xr6lt7ed2p]

If raising me wasn't your job, then your elderly care isn't my job.

[@MeMe-dx9iq]

You didn't want to be raised by anyone. You knew it all already. What's there to be raised?

[@emmasarge4057]

Amen

[@notorioushebrew4793]

You were feed, clothed and housed. They can't give you something they didn't receive.

[@mignonporter]

​@@notorioushebrew4793 Funny, I didn't receive it either, but I found away to give it to my kids! I don't accept that as an excuse!

[@dshepherd107]

Facts. My parents beat the sh*t out of us on a regular basis. We weren’t the only family that experienced that sort of stuff. Where do you think Grunge music came from? Self centered greedy abusive a-holes. My mother died in a nursing home a few years back. I didn’t see her, or pay a dime for her upkeep. Heard she was a b*tch to the staff too. Fortunately she’s ashes and gone now. We def had to raise ourselves and put up with a lot of either neglect, abuse, or bullying oftentimes. And if some bullies in the neighborhood were after you, your parents didn’t try to stop it. Nobody did. You either toughened up, or your life was miserable. Lots of Boomers acted like we were a nuisance unless we were physically working around the house. If we went on vacation, it’s bc they wanted to do something. What we wanted wasn’t considered. We’re we’re taught not to speak in front of adults either they’re having a conversation unless spoken to.

[@dannye7978]

I never realized how poorly I was parented until I raised my own children. I love my children but i made sure they had a bit of independence. Unfortunately, all the boomers gave us was divorce std's and rehab.

[@erikjohnson8031]

Sounds a LOT better than what millennials and Gen Z was given, which was mental health problems and absolutely zero grit. Let me not get started on their frigging drug problems!

[@debipalmer5775]

We got older around some people - truth 😂

[@insightbytes2136]

So I wasn't the only one? I was an only child and just kinda lived with adults. Once I could drive, I was basically an adult

[@forannies]

Facts

[@monkeyloven]

yup, you are not the only one.

[@outsidetheboxink]

You said this very well. Not easy for Boomers to hear but it is the truth. GenX, we've been doing the best we can given this huge deficit in emotional investment from our parents. Most of us figured things out but sorry you missed out on the biggest joys of raising your kids because you didn't want to handle our sorrows. You saw us as cogs in your wheelhouse and even as you retire, you still do.

[@glad777]

But they felt bad and parented the Millennial brothers and sisters they had after the divorce or two.

[@mikethemechanic7395]

Gen x here (75) My boomer parents never spent time with me. All they did was provide well and would always tell me I was wrong. Never any support. My TV was my babysitter. When I was 15 I was forced to get a job year round in HS. I was happy to get out at 18. When I had kids at 38. I made sure I spent all of my time with them. I don’t want them to be a angry teen like I was…

[@Dom-pi1gj]

Not to split hairs but at 75 you’re a boomer

[@mytherapistlife]

You did exactly what was necessary to break the cycle of parental emotional neglect. You gave your children what you didn't have- a childhood.

[@taniaswain-williams1379]

Me too. Kids later, and I give them proper attention support and interest

[@n.d.m.515]

So you are one of those parents responsible for the weak youth of today.

[@sararao8429]

Sooo true

[@JoyLady-1966]

Both of my parents were narcs. They were so busy chasing that dollar and having status at work community and church. I was an object. They are the same people in there 80 s….

[@tamarastone141]

Same....man they're STILL very self absorbed...and they still only care about money and status 🙄

[@firefeethok_tui2355]

Thats what I wrote above. Children were just things to the boomers. So true.

[@firefeethok_tui2355]

@@tamarastone141and themselves.

[@TerriResists]

Absolutely all true. My mother was an alcoholic. I had three younger brothers. I was nine getting up in the middle of the night to feed my youngest brother not long after he got home from the hospital. It didn’t stop until I left home at nineteen. And for another ten years, I contributed to their upkeep. Talk about the school of hard knocks.

[@ShaneCamburn80]

I hear you, I had to get a full time job at 13 because my parents just stopped paying the bills one day. They had their room insulated with these brown and tan fuzzy comforter blankets with animal prints on them (grizzley bears, leopards, etc.) and a kerosene heater, we had an ice cold room where you could see your breath. My brother kept crying he was cold and we decided to share a bed to conserve body heat. The next day I started looking for a job and found a farmer that needed some people willing to work in the cold and turn potatoes. Paid $10/hr cash... Got the electric and fuel oil bills paid, and kept that job until I graduated. I was putting fresh produce and steak on the table. My dad came in once and said he wanted some steak, I directed him to the freezer drawer full of hotdogs that was reserved for us (when he used to eat Sirlion and London Broils everyday). I hired him for two jobs and both times he faked injury for workman's comp and then went on unemployment after. Many of my friends, even those with parents that made better financial decisions, had similar experiences in needing to provide for themselves.

[@ShaneCamburn80]

My dad was a junkie, my mom was a pothead and alcoholic, she also enabled my dad in all his poor behaviors.

[@tombstoneranch69]

I've always thought it was just my parents that were like that, now we're seeing it was the norm of the time.

[@autumnluma]

Thank you so much for this!! So many times our generation feels crazy, but the boomers really were like this, my childhood was the same way. Thank you for talking about this.

[@samiam307]

Just got off the phone with my mom (who I had to walk through using her iPad and phone at the same time) and hung up realizing for the first time I can listen to her boomer narcissism twist my words around and not feel triggered. Only took 48 years…😏🙄😮‍💨❤️🙏❤️

[@MzBAnthony]

This..growth✊🏾

[@monkeyloven]

I have the same issue. hard to talk on the phone with them. really really hard.

[@denisetrott1816]

In person as well!!

[@huggybear441]

thank you for saying that, l always blamed my short temper when speaking to my my over the phone. i get pissed when she provides me just a keyword of something she heard on the news and expect me to elaborate it to her in detailed. Then she gets mad and accused me of knowing nothing, a fight pursued.

[@christopherkind5223]

Yes, often the young, Boomer parents were absent, but the older, Depression/WWII era parents(like mine) were not selfish or consumed by their own needs for the most part. The early Boomers 1945-54 were the Hippie, free love generation who lived-out those empty values as parents too often.

[@cyndrellawhitley7062]

Yea my parents lived for themselves. But true, my g ma was always there and also saw they were selfish to a certain extent. She didn't like to say it often but made some funny remarks about it.

[@stephanies3246]

True. When I was a kid my best friend’s mom was on the cusp of silent generation/boomer. She LOVED being a mother and was today’s equivalent of a soccer mom.

[@rosalindwyatt5603]

Yep. My parents were old when they had me. They were raised to be independent and made us independent and self-sufficient. But they showed up at our stuff, and took time out for us. They gave me a ton of freedom but the agreement was that I could keep it unless I messed it up. It's so cool that they both trusted me to be independent and taught me how to handle the responsibility.

[@anonymousone2843]

And most of us are better for it. We do not cry in a corner when we have a problem. We don't go online and ask 1000 strangers what to do. We just figure it out, solve the problem, and move on.

[@kingmaafa120]

Facts

[@lulub1433]

I'm Gen X - this. You are spot on.

[@robertcoulter4230]

I was born in 1979 and only remember my single mother cook a meal twice. We truly raised ourselves

[@dabsallday9938]

That’s why I had to cut my family off! My parents(Boomers) were so Toxic and won’t own up to being shitty parents! Now that I have 2 little ones, I’m making sure I’m giving them the support and love that I NEVER had!! I’m breaking that cycle to make sure my kids don’t hate me when they’re older!!

[@gmac9987]

Exactly the same here!!😂😂😂😂they even let their toxicness start to affect how they treated my children and my wife. I get it for me... it is what it is but not them. That's when i was done

[@shellyhart4324]

My parents did it right though. They always told me what would happen if I didn't follow the golden rule. My daughter turned out pretty awesome because of it. My dad really didn't have to tend to me too much because I was self-sufficient. My mom didn't really have to tend to me either, I figured things out on my own. When we needed information, we looked it up at libraries...

[@punkyjuarez763]

It's like you read the book of my life. My mother only cared about money, drugs and men. She used to beat the shit out of us daily just for breathing too loud but after she got clean and sober thanks to my help, she suddenly got amnesia and says that she never hit us and we were spoiled brats. I always told myself I would never be the mother that my mother was and I did the complete opposite, I let my kids have a childhood and be kids, I was involved in every aspect of their life and made sure we ate together at the dinner table every single night and I gave them what I never had. Tap, ballet, sports, vacations, birthday parties, presents under the Christmas tree and most of all Love, secretly I was living my childhood through my children and I enjoyed every moment. I don't know what it's like to have a mother's love because I'm 44 years old now and I'm still to this day begging my mother to be nice to me or try to love me a little bit but she can't even fake it. That's horrible and it hurts so bad because I love my mom even though she's the devil. I just wish I had some kind of validation from her that I'm not making it up and it did happen. I'm not traumatized because I had an amazing life, I'm f*cked up in the head because my mother's a psycho and will never admit any wrong doing or apologize for anything because she thinks she has never done anything wrong but she points her finger at everybody daily and lets you know exactly what you're doing wrong or what you need to be doing or what you should be doing or if you have a mother like mine, she's enjoying diggin My grave for me and pushing me closer and closer to it every day. It's insane because I shouldn't love her but I do but I am in the process of cutting ties and washing my hands of the situation because my disability is killing me and I might have a rare breast cancer so I want to spend the little time I have left in peace and I'm done with drama and bullshit. It's not worth it, it really hurts knowing what we've been through but being called a liar or making us feel like we're over exaggerating and we didn't have it that bad. Certain boomers like my mother needs to open their eyes and look in the mirror because it's about time. They were never around unless they were beating our asses so they don't know what we went through or what we had to do to survive because they didn't care. They just assumed that we were okay because we didn't die. 😐 Mother of the year award LOL 🤬

[@hmckinnon1974]

Right hand to God, when my daughter was was born, I believe I drafted my own ideas of how to parent. "Children should be seen, and not heard" didn't make sense to me. "I'll give you something to cry about" was another one.

[@MelanatednNature]

Exactly I'm right there with you

[@sayitaintso417]

I’ve got the exception of a boomer dad. Wherever he was absent growing up, he has tried hard to do better for my kids as a grandparent. He doesn’t even live nearby, but he drops what he’s doing every morning to FaceTime with my daughter and entertain her while I make coffee and breakfast for myself. Has no idea how to talk about feelings, but If he knows Im feeling down he will do his best to be there ❤️

[@tanakinskywalker7089]

I can count the number of times my parents hugged me on one hand. This new generation is extremely soft and sensitive. We just took all the negative and grew a thick skin and understood that we were alone

[@donnab.333]

I'm glad I'm not alone in thinking the same thing.

[@caprilefevre404]

ah, so nice to read your comment, I'm GenX, I enjoyed my independence and freedom, but I guess I was just lucky, I had plenty of love, attention and supervision, I had my mom at home and dad worked his behind off but always had time and patience for his family, also older siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends, also several elderly neighbors and church members too, I had plenty of people there for me and if I felt neglected it was only because I denied or refused help when it was offered and I felt school was my responsibility not my parent's but they were there in the evenings and offered help with homework but I seldom needed it, dad for math and science, mom for English and àrt. Each of my parents grew up in families of 12 kids or more, I certainly knew that if I needed something it was my job to ask, I don't blame my parents , I was 3xtremely blessed, however some of my siblings might feel differently idk???

[@MynicknameisViolet]

You can't see why millennials are the way they are because of gen x? Each generation is supposed to be better, not worse

[@msmom1183]

We raised this new generation (Assuming you're talking Gen Z), so if we don't like how they turn out, we only have ourselves to blame, y'know.

[@msmom1183]

​@@MynicknameisViolet well children raising children was never destined to turn out well. 😅

[@whodat4124]

Spot on. I was raised by my mom only. She was not thrilled nor involved with being a parent. All of these kid play dates, mom's with purses full of snacks, asking the kids what they want....OMG if ONLY. I raised myself and bonded with my pets and to this day I trust animals a hell of a lot more than people. Boomers overall are extremely selfish, in denial and narcissistic. And guess what ...I was called selfish for wanting food.

[@autumnluma]

With you 100%

[@erikjohnson8031]

If you had been raised as you wished, (with snack packs and play dates,) you would have been EXACTLY like Millennials and Gen Z; full of mental health problems, lacking a spine and trues grit, as well as constantly eating some sort of anti-depressant.

[@vintuitive7627]

Gen x girl here. My parents were the Silent Gen. But I still raised myself. My mom and dad divorced when I was 2. Mom died in a car accident on thanksgiving day when I was 11, on my own pretty much since then. But, as a gen Xer, that’s just “so what”. You can either sink or swim in life. I don’t need Therapy or pity. I’m not just the survivor, I’m the thriver. Love to all you other Gen xers out there! Always know that we come from the most resilient generation .

[@Bonjour612]

Their parents did the same, and basically every generation before them. It's just how things were.

[@silverbat5873]

Elder Millenial here with Boomer parents and my older siblings were Gen Xers... My father pretended to be interested then passed me off onto his sisters, our neighbors, and so on

[@KingofgraceSARA]

This! I am a borderline Gen X(had aunts a few years older)and identify as such because I raised by two millennial sisters.

[@Breckabroo33]

As a Gen X I totally agree. The only time our parents became involved was to whoop our asses!!😂😂😂 no coddling!😂

[@tonyjackson7371]

Boomers were too busy partying instead of being parents

[@HeavenlyRainPath]

Did somebody say Woodstock?

[@ShineOnBenevolentSun]

Emotional neglect - the phrase "Stop crying, or I'll give you something to cry about."

[@lortiz-baca7720]

I look back and say: “my parents did it right!”…. We figured it out ourselves, and that made us strong independent people. If we wanted to buy something we used a book of green stamps… when my husband and I had kids we gave them literally everything they wanted because we could. We created lazy adults, who can’t even think for themselves because we did all the thinking and over caring for them.

[@stanDbyme1963]

You are right, I was staying home overnight at 12, and I told my mother recently today that is called neglect and her response was I knew you were ok.

[@michaelchristophergutierre7244]

Wow she grew up in my house. Thank God I had my grandma stepping in.❤

[@tunyaau9617]

After school specials and MTV ;)

[@sbelbey]

Boomers were on crack. We figured it out. I'm good.

[@donnab.333]

Yeah, we were expected to know/understand about adult things/situations, important official documents, etc., even though we were just toddlers or elementary school age. Maybe this is why our mindset is about "knowing how to figure things out" because we literally had to figure things out because our boomer parents never taught it to us.

[@Frieghtliner1975]

Boomers missed the mark. In the end... they weren't for us back then, if we choose to be there for them now.... that is a choice for better people than me.

[@punkyjuarez763]

Thank you so much for saying those words because I have been trying to explain this to my mother for ever and I'm literally done wasting my breath 🤨 She literally beat me till I was seven months pregnant but to this day she has never admitted any wrongdoing or apologized for anything because in her mind we were spoiled and she never hit us. It blows my mind cuz even though she doesn't hit me anymore, she still to this day mentally and emotionally f*çks with me and enjoys it. It's crazy how they all have collective amnesia, because we can't all be saying the same thing if it didn't happen 💯. It's crazy how fast we had to grow up because we had no choice. If we didn't take care of ourselves, there was no one to turn to but our homies! 💯😎🚬

[@romarose]

My parents weren't boomers but I noticed all my friends who had boomer parents were severely neglected. Especially in the Disco coke swinger party 70s where a lot of mothers were on speed diet pills and valium. Then they got divorced in the 80s.

[@MrsBStacyBattleBorn]

Gen X here! Business owner, self-sufficient, mother of 5 and grandparent of 3 so far... figured out how to navigate through life from God, even though I had two parents in the home they were more consumed with each other and themselves. SO I ran the neighborhood til dark, ducked out of sight to avoid adults, teachers, cops, etc..... because authority figures were only there to punish me for what I was doing or not doing. Then when I came in the house when the street lights came on, dinner magically appeared on the stove so we could serve ourselves, clean the kitchen, take a bath and go to bed, just to get up the next day and do it all over again!

[@alizen987]

Agree, with the exception that there was interest in education on report card day-a$$ beating. "This is what I worked hard for you, for"!? 😂

[@kimberlee2809]

I had silent gen parents and am an early genX so it was different for us early genX. My parents were involved in our education BUT they also allowed us the freedom to be less supervised and more independent from an early age than parents do today.

[@janet20257]

I agree

[@uvyhtybhhhhhuhhjjjjj]

Wow! I thought that was just my experience. It's the gaslighting in my family for me, when I bring this up. I've learned to just learn how to cope with the impact myself.

[@inkdemon64mclemore57]

Yep. My parents are boomers, and both my sister and myself were left to our own devices all of the time. Honestly my sister was my parent.

[@JJerseyGirl]

When you did ask for help with school work , " I don't know, you should have asked your teacher". If you got bad grades or something went wrong, they would yell, scream, cures at you, throw things at you, and also hit you.

[@Rankbaajin]

Most succinct appraisal of my life and generation i ever heard

[@leahkeyworth]

So true. We lived majority of our childhood playing out. We looked after ourselves in the houses when parents went out. We babysat at younger ages. You was a child and kept in 'your' place. You couldnt converse with a parent, just either ignored, shouted at or spoke down too. No emotional support. We got in so much dangerous situations while out or stayed out till after dark, once you came home, parents didnt seem worried or ask where you had been.

[@karaaguilar4982]

My parents were teachers. They were invested in my grades as how it reflected on them “you’re not studying hard enough”, never an offer to help me if I was struggling. But I didn’t expect anything either.

[@gracey-the-good9005]

19 years of suffering with severe anxiety and depression. That was the year I finally got real help and then spent years in therapy. Why? Due to the trauma of physical and emotional abuse. I was often guilt shamed to behave a certain way and do not have memories of true parental love and nurturing from my biological family. The term "wait til your father comes home" was like waiting for Satan. Living in constant fear. I spent most of my high school years living with my best friend's family in lieu of running away. They loved me unconditionally and I will be eternally grateful for them taking in the Narcissist's daughter. As an adult love from my parents was shown in terms of money not emotions. My now elderly parents live a life of sadness and regret and guilt myself and siblings for this!!

[@mmland100]

Exactly my gen X childhood experience too!

[@marcydiaz246]

You just put my thoughts into words. I experienced never having a boomer teacher "make a difference " either. Somehow, a lot of us survived and thrived.

[@thealleys]

This is dead on right

[@crinner73]

The way we grew up mad us strong. We handled just about anything. We figured it out. That why we don't feel like this generation now are so weak. If something goes wrong with them , they act like a mouse right after you stomp by them. They don't know where or what to do. Way different than the way we react. Thankfully, my kids don't. I taught them to be self sufficient. It took, thank God

[@AshleySpeaks4U]

"Got older around some people." 😂 I wouldn't say we were were emotionally neglected ANY more that Boomers were. I feel our parents were VERY involved. We weren't coddled, no! Our parents wanted to know how our grades were, because if they sucked, who got screamed at? We got grounded, chewed out, watched like a hawk once we hit our teens, who we were with, where we were going. We had OUR TEACHERS-our teachers simply kicked butt. Our TEACHERS helped us meet our academic goals.

[@kitty19cat751]

This is 100% the truth.

[@CaesarConsuloProVita]

It’s true…that was my boomer parents, in a nutshell…at least in a number of ways. They were overall good parents…but lacked in emotional care areas.

[@fayeyother7336]

I agree. Completely. I live in a small community in Ga and this description is true. We were thrown out of the house during the day to do our thing, to not be bothering the adults. Not so much in a bad way, I relate it to the parents needing rest time after working hard all week and not wanting us kids under foot. You also have to know that as kids in neighborhoods, there was A LOT of kids going to be around, at some unfortunate parents house, uninvited. They had to make sure that wasn’t going to happen to them. So then when we did inevitably get into trouble, there was no discussion or time-out, no confusion about what we had done. Just straight to the point with the belt, switch, shoe toy, etc. I didn’t realize that it was an entire generation. I never thought about it really. I just knew we were raised that way. I wonder why?…..

[@spirals73]

I was supervised and neglected at the same time.

[@maryel5398]

That is an outstanding description.

[@KConsumerSails]

Finally, someone expresses what I've been trying to explain to ppl for years. I'll tell my kids all the time. I wish someone helped me with homework and life's challenges. You youngsters are blessed!

[@shab3134]

Well..I'm aGen X...I somewhat disagree. I had a community raising us...parents, neighbors, school (when discipline was there), uncles, aunts...etc. They were busy earning an income to keep us feed, clothed, feed...etc. They helped us to keep out of trouble...when they took prayer out of school and politicians got involved in destroying community...it went to hell!

[@thealchemist333]

It's funny how Gen X parents (Boomers) barely raised their kids, but then spend most of their lives trying to force the Genx adult to come home and take care of them

[@taniaswain-williams1379]

100% our feelings were not our parents concern

[@UnHuman1981]

Damn some people need to grow the hell up....I for one Loved the freedom! 😂👍

[@Biologist557]

That is so true!! I wore a Gen X raised on hose water and neglect shirt around my mum and she actually asked me if I was neglected. ??? I reminded her that she kicked us out of the house at 4yrs old and said “don’t come back till your father gets home”. Pretty sure that illegal now days.

[@st.charlesofaberdeen154]

And what's so crazy is that you're right on point and I still took care of my parents and my grandmother until their natural death, despite their lack of emotional support. As a result I'm just fresh out, I don't want to date, I don't want to mentor the generation behind me anymore, and I just want to be left alone in peace❤

[@JRsmountainretreat]

This is so spot-on

[@lCdGarcia]

WORD EMOTIONAL DAMAGE😂😂😂😂

[@THEDISH54]

My mom worked 3 jobs, teacher, editor of a newspaper and REHAB COUNSELOR PLUS BEING A MOM….my grandmother lived with us and kept us in check and doled out the punishment with a SWITCH cut by us from a tree in the backyard and she was born in 1906! We had PARENTAL FEAR…which kept us in line!

[@SpudV]

I feel sad for you I really do

[@THEDISH54]

@@SpudV I am happy for the lessons taught and the life that God gave me. I have had the pleasure of singing with LEGENDS all of my entertainment career. My character and discipline have guided me thru my life because of my parental upbringing! So you do not have to ever feel sorry for me. Lol ChinaDoll of the Platters #ARMYPROUD #ARMYSTRONG

[@SpudV]

@@THEDISH54 ah yes Stockholm syndrome is lovely this time of year UwU

[@THEDISH54]

@@SpudV wrong because I only received 3 whippings not beatings in life. I left for college at 16 years old. I was a TOMBOY and was just as rough and tough as my brothers. It made me stronger and to think before I acted. Don't just follow everyone and believe what they said at face value. Served me well with contract negotiations....not just getting excited because it was offered...but reading ever line and letter and questioning strange addendums.

[@THEDISH54]

@@SpudV and yes I received my degree with honors and have continued to enjoy my life living around the world helping as many people as I could along the way.

[@SROU64]

What helped me was finding out how my boomer parents were raised. They had it tough.

[@BryanMark-mw8sz]

we were the Goonies and Explorers, and now we are looking at our predecessors which are the teletubbies and emotwats

[@janet20257]

I was born in 1969. My parents were born in the 1920's. They were always interested in my school grades and my opinion.

[@innocentpeopledonttakethe5461]

"We got older around some people"👀

[@loumac]

So true. My parents thought they were the best because we were fed and clothed but they were emotionally abusive and neglectful.

[@EvanE988]

Gen Z here. This was basically my entire high school until covid at least. Everytime my grades slipped cause of all the stuff I had going on literally there was no asking how I was doing,do I need anything. Nope it was the teachers would only talk to make you feel bad and less about yourself for a number on a piece of paper that’s literally what school has become.

[@lyricneeder]

You are so absolutely right, my parents were in the war...your feelings? I was always told, "who the heck cares!!...I was in the stinking war!!"... shake it off!!!

[@KianaKrane0731]

I’m not mad at it. I’m happy that I had to figure it out. I feel like I have emotional armor that pulls me through anything. I also have a tenderness, deep love and tremendous loyalty to those that are important to me, because in my life, your word was your honor! I say what I mean and I mean what I say because I had to express my feelings to your face, not from behind a keyboard. Gen X has grit.

[@redwoods713]

Yes, that IS TRUTH right there!

[@hollyshaw-elliemae]

my mom used to say "my job is to keep you alive till you reach 18, not happy"

[@rickymcdonald2669]

Who raised you? I had great role models growing up in Mississippi. What?

[@luckied7542]

You were blessed.

[@hollybianchi2569]

Facts! Let's not forget boomer parents had to be reminded by the nightly news "it's 10pm, where are your children"

[@angelarichardson9484]

I am a gen x and my parents were always there for me. I was never neglected emotionally or mentally. My mom always knew when something was wrong. She made sure we sat down and talked about what was going on in my siblings life and mine. I guess I was one of the lucky ones. I still ran the roads only after I got older by myself. I thank God for the way my parents loved me and still do.

[@BobSmith-w4m]

I was born in 81 I got a taste of both worlds and you are 100percent correct when I try and talk to my mother about my childhood and how the beatings might have messed me up she rolls her eyes and mocks me it’s brutal and hilarious

[@ninajones1175]

FRFR, my mom would disappear for weeks at a time and the only time we ate was free lunch at school. She DID have a lot of issues but many friends didn’t fare much better even if parents were home

[@FlipMacz]

Nah, what you're describing is not generational parenting.....rather, it's cultural parenting styles in the U.S. Example- "Focus on Feelings," "nurturing," and "helicopter parenting," etc., all had their stay & were cultural parenting styles. (Like fashion.) But being raised by a boomer meant that you were a child likely raised around super angry or chemically dependant parents, self-sufficiency type parent attitudes, and bunches of secrets. If you were lucky enough to be raised by a boomer, the chances are you are a very self-sufficient, unflappable, low empathy, genius type, strong person.

[@OneMan-wl1wj]

Wow..very reassuring. As an only child from a horrific seething conflict (can't call it a home,) I naturally thought I was the only one..I must be I thought!. How could anyone else possibly be so thoughtless and ignorant about what it means to raise a human being. Turns out.. there were more..many more. God bless all you survivors. Thanks for the post.

[@lasandrajackson1474]

I’m a GenXer from bed-stuy Brooklyn and we had plenty of supervision. In my family and community. The community was black families working hard for their children and wanting to see them do and be better. It was a village. Everyone looked out for each other and their children and partnered with the teachers instead of seeing them as adversaries. I’m thankful for my upbringing

[@brianhale2977]

Some of my more upper class friends were raised more proactively, but we were a generation of latchkey kids.

[@myrafrancois6582]

Latchkey can imply one of two things. Your parent/s were working and couldn’t be in two places at once so you had to let yourself in or they left you on your own because they were out doing their own thing. Out of curiosity, which was it?

[@anncoxwell7015]

Kids were not the center of the world for Boomers or any generation that came before. Children had to be raised to be strong and responsible because it was very likely in previous generations that parents would not be alive to help them (War, disease, nuclear threat etc) . In my lifetime, cholera, polio, smallpox, measles, mumps, and other diseases could literally wipe out families. So before you judge, try researching the generations and what actually influenced their decisions.

[@Mortonadonna]

Nope it was coke and alcohol and worries about their own love life.

[@nalimiendeern]

Gen X and turned out perfectly fine.