Harm OCD - How to Overcome Harmful or Violent Obsessions

www.restoredmi...
www.restoredmi...
In this episode, I discuss a subtype of OCD known as Harm OCD. If a person suffers from Harm OCD they will generally experience unwanted and intrusive harmful or violent thoughts. In this first part of this series I discuss specific thoughts people with Harm OCD experience. I also discuss different compulsions people engage in and a few very important steps in the treatment process.
About Matthew Codde:
Matthew Codde LCSW has worked in the field of mental health for over a decade and maintains a specific passion for helping others take their lives back from OCD & Anxiety-Related Disorders. Matt maintains the firm belief that recovery from OCD & Anxiety is absolutely possible, despite what others may proclaim. By utilizing various programs and digital resources, his company, Restored Minds, has helped thousands of people learn the proper evidence-based techniques needed to find freedom from OCD & Anxiety and go on to live fulfilling lives.
Follow us on Social Media for the latest updates: 👇🏻
Facebook: / restoredmindscommunity
Instagram: / restoredminds_
Twitter: / restoredminds
Listen and Subscribe to our Podcast: 👇🏻
anchor.fm/rest...
SUBSCRIBE for More Videos: 👇🏻
www.youtube.co...
MEDICAL DISCLAIMER:
All information, including references, links, and other knowledge sources, provided by The OCD and Anxiety Show KZbin Channel and Podcast are for informational purposes only. Anything expressed on the aforementioned platforms should NOT be construed as medical, clinical, or professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
The content posted on the platforms is not meant to replace the services of a qualified therapist, doctor, or other health professionals, or to serve as a substitute for professional mental health, medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The use or reliance of any information contained in this content is solely at your own risk.
The OCD and Anxiety Show will not be held accountable for the consequences should you take any decisive action based on any content provided. Accordingly, we strongly advise you to consult qualified professionals prior to taking action. Utilizing the platforms does not establish a therapist-patient relationship between you and The OCD and Anxiety Show, or any persons appearing on the KZbin Channel and Podcast.

[@defiancenow6621]

I cried really hard because I don't want to harm anyone. I just want to live a good life.

[@pnharshithaharshitha311]

Did u overcome it

[@defiancenow6621]

@@pnharshithaharshitha311 oh yea, I learned to live above all thoughts, only now is real.

[@Idkyournameee]

Me too..But the fact that we cry and we feel so guilty about it shows how we would never cause harm to anyone..we are great people ❤

[@Moalbait]

@@defiancenow6621how did you do it

[@defiancenow6621]

@@Moalbait keep your mind busy, you need some kind of motivation to move forward, exercise, let go of alcohol or any drugs. Your time is short here make the best of it. You must rule your mind before it rules you.

[@rafsoto6383]

These thoughts scare the hell out of me! Makes me feel like my mind is turning evil from everything I've been through. I'm truly scared 😨 thanks for these videos I now know I am not alone.

[@seadragon4425]

I know exactly how you feel. For the longest time I just thought I was going insane and becoming delusional because no one else I knew had obsessed over these thoughts or ever did compulsions. I was actually told that OCD was a misdiagnosis by a past therapist (she didn’t really help me much, she kinda made things worse. The suggestions for treating anxiety she gave me didn’t work) and I didn’t even know that it wasn’t one. I felt so alone and people with general anxiety didn’t quite understand where I was coming from and why I kept obsessing over things like this. Once I found out that I do in fact have harm OCD, it felt strange. Pretty much every definition of a harm OCD intrusive thought matches perfectly with me. Before I knew what it was, I had never felt so alone

[@doublem6027]

@@seadragon4425where did you find help?

[@jayjoe8834]

Yeah Bro, I've been having this off an on since I was about 18, I'm 37 now ...I always somehow got rid of it, by not caring about it. But after a while your living your life, everything is going well and Baam it starts to come back slowly but surely and I had to go through all the steps all over again, in the beginning there was no help I had to figure out how to get rid of it myself and woke up one day and said to myself I have enough, I'm not going to let this ruin my Day anymore, I don't care about it anymore and after a few days it really worked. But sadly it always came back, if you start giving it more thought then it comes back and you find yourself caught up in it again. It's hard to stop giving it though but that's what you have to do, forget about it, it doesn't matter, it's a thought like a million other thoughts that come to mind, it means nothing at all . If you don't think about it and just keep doing what your doing, it goes away eventually...it might come a few more times but if you ignore it enough and really don't think about the meaning behind the thought( because it has no meaning) it at all it goes away. Your want a 100% reinsurance that it won't happen or that you won't think it again, and this keeps making it come back because you constantly think you have to reinsure that it won't happen, and this creates a cycle that never ends, because your Brain doesn't know 100% there are always possiblitys so it can never give you a 100% reinsurance, really the only way is to ignore it.

[@ishakawade9100]

Dear lovely OCD people, I tell you I love you all you all are so good you have never hurted anyone even if u have its okay man! U will never kill someone u don't need to u will never kill yourself this ocd tries to bully us tries to say u are that kind of person but u are who you are and u can break through let's just fight this together now laugh hard and don't forget to smile!

[@Mavericknmaddie]

Your videos are great! I have suffered from OCD for the past 45 years. Some years were better than others. It has changed themes many times. It is a hard disorder to deal with but I am living proof you can survive it! Keep the videos coming.

[@mattazure1868]

45 fucking years oh fuck man, I'm 18 years old and this fucking shit would not leave me alone, it's just constantly repeating in my mind. For fuck sakes I just want a normal life, I'd give a leg if I had to. I just can't go 45 years man I gotta get rid of this thing. I've had it since I was a kid

[@Mavericknmaddie]

@@mattazure1868 Matt, you can live a happy life in spite of OCD. Believe me when I say that I have experienced every theme possible. Hit me out of the blue as a teen and back in those days no one even knew much about it. I was afraid to even tell anyone my thoughts because they would think I was going crazy. I thought I was going crazy. OCD is life long but you are strong enough to handle this. I promise you that. If I can, you can. You will master your mind and realize just how intelligent you really are. Watch Elizabeth McInvale videos. She suffered from OCD and her videos are great. She is a doctor now in Houston, TX and runs an OCD treatment center there. Good luck man.

[@gabrielsimbachosenboxing6734]

It's like it attacks the people I love the most. I have fears of hurting people I love. I don't want them to get hurt so I stay completely away from them, it really sucks because I love them...

[@gabrielsimbachosenboxing6734]

@what. nbba thanks bro. That's true 💯

[@nottobecompared4099]

Brandon SIMBA Silvestre Boxing Same here. How are you coping?

[@gabrielsimbachosenboxing6734]

@@nottobecompared4099 I guess the fact that you can't control your thoughts but your actions helps. I would never want to cause harm to anyone let alone my loved ones so I always try to remember I'm in control. My thoughts are just a manifestation of my fears.

[@nottobecompared4099]

Brandon SIMBA Silvestre Boxing Very true. I trust myself to not ever act on any of them. It’s really just anxiety trying to get the best of us but we can’t let it take control. I’ve been trying to close my eyes & just let the thoughts subside. They usually go away but come back but I’m getting better slowly but surely. Hang in there. We got this! Just have to stay calm & tell ourselves to just stay in the present moment.

[@hueso5071]

@@nottobecompared4099 may i ask how the thoughts started? Or was it something you always had? I'm on the same boat, dealing with them can very overwhelming at times. ☹️

[@hannadiaz3489]

I’ve been having problems with harm ocd during quarantine for about a week and it’s been horrible and I can’t get treatment because of this lockdown. This video was a lot of help, thank you.

[@jak3b307]

Me too :(

[@hopkinsmichaelj]

You may want to check out treatmyocd.com, they also have an app in google play and IOS called NOCD. They accept insurance and do Skype or zoom style treatment. I have found it very helpful.

[@marissafelitto4477]

@@jak3b307 I know this was a long time ago, but I'm doing remote therapy with a therapist and a lot are offering that. Hope you are dong better!

[@mikelia6418]

The mind that seeks truth . youtube channel is helpful also if you want more.

[@Joethebro101]

I’m convinced that the mental compulsions are what’s keeping people from recovering. Yes, working to not do physical compulsions is important but realizing a mental compulsions is no different than physical compulsions is what we have to strive for. ❤️

[@doublem6027]

So what do we do? It feels like my mind is going to take over me and im going to hurt my love ones and that gives me extreme anxiety that makes me feel not normal

[@Joethebro101]

@@doublem6027 With practice I’m learning how to passively accept, allow, and disregard the obsession, not avoiding things in life, and not doing the compulsions, whether they are physical or mental.

[@edgarherrera7608]

Thank you so much for posting this video, this OCD racket can be seriously disturbing. I went to the psych ward to get help from these intrusive harm thoughts and was given meds that really help. I'm doing much better now even though I still get the thoughts. They are less intense and less frequent, so when they come I do my best not to do compulsions or try to have any kind of relationship with these thoughts. I just let them come and go....a thought is a thought is a though period. This stuff is treatable.

[@Lindseyunfiltered]

What medixine?

[@DM-ji9lr]

Hola Edgar, estoy pasando por esto. Podrías decirme que medicina?! Te lo Agradeciera mucho!!

[@hueso5071]

How did the thoughts start or was it something you always had? I'm dealing with them too because of my depression. But it isn't something lve dealt with my whole life only up until adult hood.

[@gallogaxiola7120]

I’m terrified of hurting people or any living being... I accidentally killed an ant and I felt kind of bad, but then my mind started making a “snowball” that just kept growing to the point I started questioning “why is killing wrong?” “Who am I?” “why shouldn’t I kill?” I’ve been fighting this for years and now I’m scared, because today I don’t feel too much anxiety... maybe because I went full compulsion mode and I knew I didn’t want to act on those thoughts... I’m just looking for an explanation or maybe some encouraging. Anyway, thanks for reading!

[@kevinwilson2348]

You gotta remove compulsions. I’m still working on that myself. But u can’t live avoiding things cause that makes it worse sometimes

[@sss-nc9vw]

Omg the thoughts like "why is killing wrong" etc.... I have the same. Always wondering what life is about and scared that I'll change my morals.... + my mind convinces me I like the thoughts.... How are you doing now?

[@gallogaxiola7120]

@@sss-nc9vw I just read this... Sorry for taking so long answering. I feel way better now. I removed compulsions and the thoughts just went away and I am really thankful for this. To anyone who reads this, I just want to say IT DOES GET BETTER. For real, I have been off my meds for a while now, because I don't even need them anymore. And I can swear that I thought it was over for me, that I would never be able to improve. Please have faith people, it's not over. I have learned so much lately, and all of that is behind me now. Best wishes for everyone, please reach out for help, it really works :)

[@gallogaxiola7120]

@@thelost_blue.potato6969 I understand that it can be hard to talk about it. I'm 19 years old now and I tried to hide it for several years and I can only tell you that it won't help you. You have to reach out for help and talk to someone you trust. These type of thoughts are something EVERYONE goes through, the main difference is the effect it has on us, most people just let them go by, they don't get fixated on it. It is a natural and healthy response to be disgusted and anxious with these types of thought, because I have some great news: that means it is not something you would do or like to do and that's why it makes you feel uneasy! Please talk to someone, it will really help you :)

[@gustavbaltes27]

Absolutely amazing video. I have harm-OCD thanks for normalizing the condition.

[@IceQuebe]

I've had these thoughts for about 2 years now and been avoidant of them but recently I've been wanting to fight them, as like my will power has gotten stronger to fight them. Time to show myself I'm ok!

[@restoredminds]

Hey, Feel free to attend our FREE Masterclass. Visit www.restoredminds.com/free-training to reserve a seat!

[@queenangelise7284]

I've had on and off harm OCD intrusive thoughts. First time I had one a couple months ago. It was terrifying. Out of nowhere I had a thought a stabbing my family in there sleep at night with a knife. The thoughts frightened me for days, I thought I was the craziest person alive or that I might so something like that, even tho I love my family and would never. I felt like I wanted to hide the knives away. I also have a thought or fear of sneaking a knife in my backpack and bringing it to school. It's terrible. It's good that they come and go for long periods of time

[@kevinwilson2348]

same exact thing with worrying about bringing knife in backpack

[@bb8m822]

For 2 months i had HOCD. Then on Thursday night the word pedophile got stuck in my head its horrible as soon as it did i started crying and attempted suicide. Then just last night i had this horrible grim thought that i molested my sister i started crying again ive never had this thought before the last 2 months of my life have been grim id never ever hurt my sister. So i debated suicide again i thought what is going on my family aren’t safe if im thinking this i dont feel stable its horrible even though id never do such a thing. Then i took a step back last night and thought its all just 1 big lie. A false reality i was happy again until this morning. So now im getting thoughts that i might stab someone i dont know what is going on how do i tell my family i dont want to harm my sister shes beautiful and only 13 and were so close. These thoughts are disgusting and disturbing. They feel so real. Im constantly reassuring myself again like i did with HOCD AND POCD id never do such a thing im so depressed. Literally i don’t feel my family is safe with me around only about 5 minutes ago i was thinking about jumping infront of a train. I commented on your other pocd vid yesterday this thing is horrible i swear id never ever hurt my little sister i need help i feel like im going mad or schizophrenic. Im scared to tell my family because they might get nervous.

[@ranera2616]

..i feel you Bro. Me also like that, but I can handle it now. Be strong.. Just label and understand it that its only a thought. You are the awareness, the thought is not you..

[@fordpeters7282]

You are not alone. Over a hundred billion people have walked this Earth and chances are, some of them had those thoughts too. What you have thought, someone else has too. There is a difference between those who have thoughts and those who act on them. I assure you, you are not going crazy, they are just distressing thoughts. God bless you, and I hope this helps.

[@gabrielsimbachosenboxing6734]

Bro I've had different OCD themes as well. I can tell you 💯 percent that you have OCD. Because the themes change. Your mind finds something that you fear and latch on to them. Like the things you care about are attacked in a negative way. Example, you have a thought about harming your family. So you are suicidal, you lock yourself in your room and stay away from them. The fact they you have so much guilt, anxiety, and pain about these thoughts it shows your true character. You are a loving and caring person and you don't want these things to happen. Hope that helps. Your not alone. God Bless

[@brysonreedy7067]

I don’t know if anyone could help but I’m in a weird place with these thoughts right now. So the anxiety has mostly gone away, but that just makes my brain think I want to do them, so when I deny it , it just makes me think I’m in denial about the thought and that I actually want to do these things. I’ll tell myself I don’t want to hurt people but it just feels like I’m lying to myself. Before I let myself ruminate( I have a bad habit of it) I was able to tell myself that but no it just feels like I’m lying to myself. Keep in mind I’ve never had a history of hurting people or being violent. It’s like the thoughts are convincing me

[@Hasoondawood]

Hey! I just passed by I hope you’re alright To be completely frank with you this was the most worrisome thing I and others experienced and exactly what you described applies on the situation me and others I read about had. Here’s the thing with anxiety that comes with OCD, it lies And it can actually generate false arousal or false belief that is so convincing, that you think that you’re in denial.. it’s how much power you chose to give it. And the more scared you get the more real the thought feels. And the anxiety is so much so that your body urges you to find immediate relief or reassurances. And the cycle keeps going on and on. You could be feeling like “oh but you don’t know me what if im the one in a thousand that is actually a psycho?” Well, your anxiety is more than enough evidence that your main problem is fear of losing control and doing something terrible and you just analyze possible situations that aren’t even imminent. Focus on the present moment. Be mindful about it and confront it.

[@brysonreedy7067]

Da Capital hey thanks for the response! I’ve been doing a lot better, I still have it pop up, but it’s lost a lot of it’s power I’m actually about to do stuff and enjoy things with friends while I’m in college. I still have that denial that bother me but I remember that I’m in controller and just because my mind makes me think that doesn’t mean it’s true. Thanks for taking the time to respond I appreciate it 👍🏽

[@Hasoondawood]

Bryson Reedy that’s great news ! the denial thing takes time but you have to know it’s just a trick.. like the guy in the video said these are ego-dystonic thoughts so they don’t align with who we really are.. the anxiety part tricks us into believing that we are hiding from who we really are.. good luck and take care !

[@nottobecompared4099]

Da Capital Exactly. I’m struggling with this now. Anxiety can get the best of me sometimes but I have to keep reminding myself that’s these thoughts don’t define me & sometimes that’s relief.

[@mastertree47]

Thanks for all your help ! I have harm OCD but years ago during a very stressful time in my life it went up a notch to something called "False memories". I would really appreciate it if you would make a video about false memories. I see it come up quite a bit on the online support group I belong to. Thanks again

[@shehzasheri3065]

How did u overcome it? Could u pls help me😓

[@agirg1025]

I need help overcoming this as well

[@movingandrollingforward]

Keep going man this stuff is so needed

[@jimlewis3050]

I've been dealing with this for more than a year & a half & I'm at my wit's end. My family doesn't believe me that I have these thoughts & they continuously claim that I'm faking it. I have very few friends to turn to as well. I'm also too afraid (plus cannot afford) to seek therapy (I'm afraid they would send me to a mental asylum). I'm worried that the thoughts are beginning to affect my physical health. I'm willing to do anything to overcome these thoughts or at least reduce them. Thank you for putting this video up. It really provided me with some clarity.

[@caitlyndiann285]

I’m truly convinced there is no theme worse than harm ocd, but I guess I’m heavily biased because it’s my worst theme. I’ve managed to make peace with my other themes like existential and relationship ocd but this one… I just can’t tolerate the uncertainty. I just can’t. It goes against everything in me and I want so badly to just know for 10000000% certain I will never hurt someone or my loved ones, but I can’t have that certainty and no one can. Acceptance of that I think is what will send us into recovery. And eliminating compulsions of course. But it’s so difficult. I hope you’re doing alright these days and you’re definitely not alone ❤

[@spaniel3578]

You explained my condition exactly. Thank you so much for your videos. They're so very helpful for these issues.

[@annaliljenwall373]

Thank you for the work you do, Matt!

[@restoredminds]

Welcome!

[@richymatthews1422]

Hiya i recently finished my OCD support group, i think the main things i learnt was about trying to tolerate the anxiety through not checking or seeking reassurance, mindfulness (leaves on a stream), trying to notice or observe thoughts, a little anti-OCD, generally trying to tolerate the anxiety through not seeking reassurance, and to try distance myself from my thoughts i aware on self reflection that i think im very emotionally sensitive, i think i can be triggered easily; though emotional detachment in its positive and compassionate sense helps me cope, though being sensitive can make coping with OCD thoughts harder at times, possibly i think i may care to much i not sure, OCD seems to attack what i care about i think at times i have are violent thoughts and they feel so real, i think i react emotionally and over-emotionally at times to them because they feel so real and upsetting, and thoughts can make it difficult to tell what is and what isnt real, i also get thoughts (little like tourettes) where i feel i want to blurt out obscenities, or feel i want to write down obscenities, though i try resist, it can feel very tiring at times i think i still really struggle with being able to accept reassurance at times, esp when i feel anxious i think what reinforces OCD, or makes it worse, is something bad could happen and i could not tolerate it if it did in my mind i think i was wondering (hope this doesn't sound a silly Q), how would i try disengage with the violent thoughts and thoughts i want to blurt out/write down obscenities? would emotional detachment in a compassionate sense and mindfulness help possible, or roll my eyes at myself, when i noticing i having a upsetting thought could i try saying something like to myself "im noticing im having a thought that eg i blurted out the word "f**k" if possible or "im noticing i had a thought that i knocked over a computer screen", to try to distance myself from the thoughts even if they feel real? when my mind wont accept reassurance, could i try in the very nicest way "purposely not worry", walk away or not seek reassurance even from myself (even if it feel very hard to do)? kind regards thanx richy :)

[@elchulo13agt]

I struggle really bad with intrusive thoughts to the point it really destroys my life I’ve found that cannabis especially cbd has really helped me cope with it ... I also avoid watching any violent shows like this CSI shows .... so by using cannabis to help is that considered a compulsive action? or avoiding watching certain stuff to avoid triggers considered a compulsion?

[@torleif5167]

Using cannabis is an escape and i would not reccomend it

[@elchulo13agt]

tor leif typical ignorant uneducated beliefs you have there

[@Hasoondawood]

Hey pal,, the avoidance of certain tv material can develop into a compulsion if it isn’t already but smoking can be somewhat okay as long as you aren’t dependent on it

[@jaredrios6040]

i have these a lot man can you help me

[@trulygains]

How’s your treatment going?

[@arraelle7453]

I am discovering what harm OCD is, and a lot of this reflects what I experienced during my whole life. However, I'm not entirely sure it's that, because I had obsessive thoughts about killing animals in my childhood, and I ended strangling (and killing) a rabbit and then, a few day after, a bird (I also killed a lot of fish by squeezing them when I was really young, and hurted my cats too, even though I loved them really much). However, a lot of other harm thoughts I have, I did not manifested them and some of them are certainly pure "fantazies", so I'm not sure it is OCD or not. I do avoid certain situations (like sleeping at a friend's house for the night because I think I could kill someone when he is sleeping), but I also love and I'm excited about viewing "triggering" shows, movies etc. that reflect theses obsessive thoughts.

[@jaredrios6040]

If I pay 37 a month I get full access to the master class, ongoing monthly training , private community, and special bonuses all just for 37 a month

[@agirg1025]

I can’t even stop thinking about the past, how can I seperate if I don’t truley believe I am a good person ?

[@janzzferman6347]

Thank you ❤️keep helping us please ❤️

[@seadragon4425]

The single most weirdest and worst intrusive thought I have: This started when a kid was supposedly reported missing at my school. And me having harm OCD, my OCD came up with the intrusive thought that “what if you’re the reason why he’s missing? What if you murdered him?!?” When 1, he returned home safely the next day. And 2, I didn’t even know him. But despite him being home safe, I still have intrusive thoughts like “what if you murdered him” even though he’s alive and well. I don’t fucking know why I get stressed about that

[@lilysaxhull6095]

Thank you so much

[@lu8201]

I wouldn't suggest exposure therapy. Acceptance therapy might help better.

[@ishakawade9100]

Its the same tbh

[@ricardorodriguessilva3432]

Thank you.

[@oscarvillatoro4194]

So you are saying I need to watch tv shows that I have avoided?

[@annakodric3613]

What if your compulsions are purely mental? I just get a ton of anxiety and pretend like nothing is happening. So does that mean i should just try to overcome my anxiety?

[@teevee7678]

yeS overcoming ur anxiety will stop u from having an obsessive thought in ur mind

[@alexandrarodriguez3057]

I experienced this for the first time a few days ago at my job I was feeling really stress and I was having thoughts of hitting my coworker I had the urge of hitting my coworker I dint do it but do you think the people around us know what is happening to us ?

[@hitlordaa3479]

Can someone pls help me on what to do for the tripple a response. I don't really get what to do

[@seadragon4425]

Is it weird that one of my compulsions is throwing up?

[@chloe9505]

But I dont have compulsion for harmful intrusive thoughts and also I used to be violent (toward my siblings) and I have bad anger issues what if these thoughts are real? I dont want to harm anyone but what if I do?

[@restoredminds]

Hey, Feel free to attend our FREE Masterclass. Visit www.restoredminds.com/free-training to reserve a seat! Hope I can answer your question there!

[@bradenmackay2646]

I need help I’m having a killing thoughts it’s forcing me please what do I do

[@joba8118]

Know yourself, let it pass as thoughts do not reflect you. Your mind is just bored.

[@bradenmackay2646]

Joakyn Bugarin thanks for saying that

[@Hasoondawood]

Don’t worry about the content of the thought.. because if you keep focusing on the thought content itself you’ll be stuck in a vicious circle that involved analyzing and obsessing over it and thinking you “have to do something before it’s too late” a lot of is fear of losing control and so you avoid sharp objects, weapons and being around a vulnerable individual because the anxiety kicks in and the thought that you would do something. that’s when the unhealthy reassurance ritual kicks in and gives you temporary relief for that specific thought. And your mind will generate another thought that’s way different. It’s like trying to catch a bird and it keeps flying away. So instead focus on the problem itself which is OCD and not the fact that you are a bad person or that you might act out. Check out his website I felt like he’s the most person that understands this issue and can further help you out. Hope you’re ok!

[@chelzyramirez3663]

How are you doing now ?

[@bradenmackay2646]

Chelzy Ramirez not good these thoughts get worse

[@bradenmackay2646]

It’s telling me

[@simplymarley1802]

ive thought i was going crazy and i looked it up,, im not diagnosed. but im a child and is that normal for me to be a child with hocd?? i feel insane

[@queenangelise7284]

Hey I am 12. Do you have thoughts of killing people or doing harm to the ones you love and you would never hurt? Well I kinda have these thoughts too ur not alone it's scary but hang in there

[@simplymarley1802]

@@queenangelise7284 yes i do ts scary to think

[@gamingcharter7504]

@@queenangelise7284 i started having this i have dpdr too o feel the same as you id reccomend go see a prosfessional therapist because you are young im going to see therapist too dont wory i feel the same like killing myself or kill someone else that i love the most so dont worry be calm and dont bother them play games do anything to distract the thoughts

[@chelzyramirez3663]

Gaming charter I have the same too but I also have like mean thoughts about people I love and care about that I don’t mean. Like if I’m talking to a person at the moment a mean thought about them comes into my mind. Or if I hear about a person dying or a person who is sick I get a thought like “I hope they die” even tho I would never mean it. I don’t know if I’m a bad person or if this is ocd. But don’t worry the violent thoughts you are getting like hurting people you love will go away I used to have these years ago and they went away.

[@gamingcharter7504]

@@chelzyramirez3663 im doing better now thank you so much i dont know why i had this i never had anxiety problems and yes your thoughts sound like ocd but dont worry they will go try accepting them rather than worrying it is helping me im very confident now whenever i had thought like that i just accept them and i say ok go ahead and i never smoked weed in my life do you think its genetics to have anxiety or a panic attack bcause it all started from there

[@lucifer2b666]

I'm curious if anyone ever acts on these thoughts. I have OCD (diagnosed with a severe case at age 3) and I have sexual, religious and violent intrusive thoughts that I never act on. Only two major and dangerous intrusive thoughts I've acted on (years ago) and I'm curious if it's common and under reported or if it's so uncommon that it's an anomaly and that's why there's hardly verifiable cases of this happening. Want to point out to anyone coming across this comment, it's widely considered that violent or very disgusting (to ourselves) intrusive thoughts are not acted on. I'm just wondering why I myself have acted on intrusive thoughts before despite not wanting to do them. Like I did it and it felt like I was kinda numb and then I was like "Damn I messed up. Why did I do that? I almost killed myself from being an idiot". Both instances I was 16-17 years old. In one case, I crashed my first car that way and almost killed myself when I first began driving. Told myself to speed up full throttle, my sports car in a short parking lot and crashed into a tree going 55 head on. Didn't want to do that, I had a date later that day and a family party at night and no suicidal or self harming thoughts whatsoever and never have. I felt so dumb. Lost the girl same day when I told her and the party had to get cancelled. Car was totaled but I was totally unscathed. Never told anyone why I crashed the car. I said I was being dumb and doing tricks but I clearly wasn't. Everyone knew something was weird about it but nobody ever confronted me. Just curious if stuff like this happens even on a minor scale like touching a burning stove or something like that because an intrusive thought becomes an obsession suddenly.

[@lucifer2b666]

About the crash: Full hour before the crash I thought about how I was going to crash. Similar to the movie final destination where they see the future and that they would die. Well, it was an intrusive thought where I felt like that about crashing. I knew it was just a silly thought and brushed it off but continued to think about it every couple minutes during my hour long ride home from my grandma's house. When I pulled in to the parking lot where my house is, I got this thought to hit the gas pedal and I couldn't shake it. I told myself, "I can break. It's fine. Just a slight boost on the gas and I'll only reach 30mph and slow down right away." Then I'm going full speed (got to 55mph) straight into the tree. Hit the breaks about two hundred feet before impact and it was wet and I had no ABS so I didn't slow down at all. Saw my life flash before my eyes and BOOM! Car chunks everywhere, airbags deployed and windshield is busted and I'm sitting there looking at myself for injuries and I'm totally fine just in shock and confused why I just did that. Then I just started swearing at myself for being dumb and called my parents and profusely apologized for ruining their day and the car (despite that I paid for the car). Me and my Dad pushed the car and semi drove it into a spot and picked up the chunks of metal. I felt really lost. I don't really know how that happened or why exactly. Such a weird feeling to describe but after that I never played on the road again, gained anxiety attacks on the road occasionally, fears of crashes causing me to be obsessed with following all traffic and speed laws to a tee and now I am told I drive better than people's parents who've driven for 30+ years. I don't think that's a bad thing. Yes, I'm anxious and have been for years now since the crash. Everyday feels like my first day driving despite the years of experience and muscle memory. I think honestly it was one of the best driving lessons I ever received and humbled me greatly. But the event to this day still has me scratching my head because there's little to no literature on people with OCD acting on intrusive thoughts they don't want to do.

[@charlieneedstherapy7692]

I've had this for years now and I gotta be honest, I couldn't be happier to find out that there's a cure, that I'm not the only one, that I'm not crazy! Praise God!❤

[@caitlyndiann285]

How are you doing now? I’m struggling with this a bit currently 💜

[@charlieneedstherapy7692]

@@caitlyndiann285 I'm doing quite well now! Thank you I still struggle from time to time but nowhere near the way I used to. I hope you can start recovering as well and remember to keep going because it's most definitely worth it

[@caitlyndiann285]

@@charlieneedstherapy7692 thank you so much. I’m still struggling although it has gotten better! I’m hopeful. Anxious, but hopeful lol. I hope you’re doing well 💕

[@charlieneedstherapy7692]

@@caitlyndiann285 glad to hear it's gotten better for you! Recovery is one of the best things ever, even if it is slow