Have You Ever Regretted Adopting A Child?

[@thebeebz9511]

Should be called "siblings who regretted their parents adopted a child, what's your story?" Plot twist: these are all parents pretending to be "siblings" to lament regretting their adoptions without admitting it.

[@Luziemagick]

You busted them all, Sherlock..well done!!!

[@suchamoodright4902]

👏🏾👏🏾

[@Emura100]

The Beebz isn’t that how most reddit subs go? Reddit: people in this situation how did you deal with this People on reddit: I don’t actually qualify for this but I want to tell a story anyways.

[@ICEBUNNo]

“Humans of reddit...” “Not a human, but”

[@remy3262]

They rlly put Stuart Little as the thumbnail-

[@itiswhatitis1883]

NO DIGNITY!

[@alex.mp4831]

anyone would regret adopting stuart little

[@itiswhatitis1883]

‎

[@justcallmelucky]

😂

[@bax2603]

😂😂😂

[@LilyGrace1990]

My aunt and uncle adopted a little girl because they had 2 boys and really wanted a daughter. What resulted was them having a wonderful daughter and my aunt getting to do all of the mother/daughter things she always wanted to do. And my grandmother, who was disappointed I wasn't very girly, got another granddaughter to dote on and go clothes shopping with and all of that stuff I was never interested in. My great aunt on the same side of the family adopted a boy a couple years before I was born and I found out recently he just got married and is doing great. Please don't think badly of adoption from this video. It's a gamble no matter what, but there are so many adopted kids who turn out just fine.

[@bente1695]

Katie Marie adoption can go good or bad. Imo, it depends on the agency and the kid itself obviously. Some agencies are really shady and don’t disclose the whole deal, and some kids are “trickier” than others; they have more issues to deal with. You need to decide as a parent if you’re equipped to deal with that.

[@fsketchdesignsfengmei3762]

THANK. YOU. Not all adoptions turn to nightmares. 👍

[@LOVEAapjes]

@@bente1695 Getting your own child is a gamble too. They can be as horrible as the ones described in the video.

[@RoseTheWolf36]

My mother and her brother were adopted. Im all for adoption, and it's not the kid's fault theyre in the situation they are in. It takes a strong and kind heart to give them a second chance.

[@chaosgamer016_5]

I know one adopted kid always behevid like a child even in high scool but his mother spoiled him to the frik he never even made his roome so that explains a lot

[@MsMdip]

I know more adoption success stories than bad ones, but these goes to show you how much irreparable damage a child can suffer from abuse and neglect, even in the womb. Very sad.

[@dogguy8603]

Seems like quite a few of these troubled kids are from former Soviet countries wher ethey have shit records, former orphanages in these nations are notoriously horrible and abusive to the kids

[@mooseass2996]

Sounds like abortions would fix this problem

[@ghost_cities]

MooseAss sounds like the mothers made a conscious choice not to abort the children

[@nothanks1239]

Either that, or the adoptive parents aren't all that great either and caused more damage. Don't believe all these stories have innocent adoptive parents.

[@fairyjuggalo8368]

@@mooseass2996 or simply using birth control

[@lisajones9]

I’m adopted and I’m insanely relieved to have turned out normal 😂

[@march.286]

weren't you killed by Kira?

[@too_gay_for_this3995]

@@march.286 he has returned from the dead. Horray!

[@biancaking2502]

OoFed

[@kaassaus4230]

Everyone would say that about themself. Almost Nobody would call themself a piece of shit

[@DieAlteistwiederda]

Thankfully most adopted people turn out fine. I mean my oldest cousin is adopted too and he is weird but not weirder than any of us not adopted cousins. Could have been a lot worse.

[@yltraviole]

That Russian girl was probably sexually abused before she was adopted. A lot of child sexual abuse survivors start exhibiting very inappropriate behavior like that at a young age. Poor kid :(

[@beyondviolet]

yltraviole like the one from the 2nd story, except they knew about it

[@candicezhang8619]

I was never sexually abused when I was a child(not that I remembered). I behaviored the same when I was younger. Just pure curiosity and wanna watch who can get into trouble et

[@relaxwithrats9598]

Ah the childhood hypersexuality that comes from CSA -.- its not easy and it destroys your relationship with everyone around you, you struggle to form healthy relationships even in adulthood and its hard to understand people's intentions towards you.

[@michibmoon]

@@relaxwithrats9598 Yep, and it can make you feel like you're never enough sexually for a person. Even if every other aspect is great, you'll never feel enough if you don't look/act sexual enough. It's terrible and I hate this mentality, but it's really hard to escape. Just have to force yourself to think rationally.

[@anitaahr2949]

wait i remember doing things like that w friends as a toddler bit i don’t remember being sexually abused at a young age tho

[@WayWardWonderer]

Pressured into adopting for being married for 2 years without having a kid? WTF? That's the WORST reason to ever adopt a kid! Don't take in a child just because SOMEONE ELSE told you to do it!

[@rxg9er]

I almost turned out like one of the kids described in the video. I still have a lot if issues myself. Attachment problems can really mess an entire family up. On the one hand, a child with attachment problems needs love and affection like any other child. On the other hand, such a child can be terrified of anyone who tries to fulfill these needs. This contradiction can play havoc with a child's psyche, causing them to lash out. Once you know how awful a person can be, it can be hard to trust anyone, because even the .000001% any given person is as awful as you fear is intolerable. Sadly, many abused children never really recover.

[@siraksleepmastersiraksleep9814]

oh.... damn..if i may, what do you think about the parents solution on 6:09 to hold the child whenever he had an outburst/tantrum?? its something that can help the child?

[@cindy03709]

Exactly specially if that child was harmed by the person you are suppose to be able to trust the most your own parents

[@luciferswaltz]

@@siraksleepmastersiraksleep9814 as someone who has attachment issues , for me , that would REALLY help , as it reassures the child that the parents aren't ever going to leave him behind. It eases his fear of being abandoned and forgotten. As the op in the video said , the outbursts stopped , so obviously , it worked really well.

[@Jackylification]

Ok, one of those had serious signs of molestation and the ops response is to never be alone with the child instead of telling the parents? Some of these are awful and not because the kids were terrible.

[@cindy03709]

🙌

[@12carla4]

I don't want to blame him but maybe if he said something that child might had gotten the help that she needed

[@maisiethebabyspider9229]

ikr?!?!?!? Such a disgusting unempathetic piece of crap

[@danielbridges3730]

Probably scared the situation would turn around. "Your kid came on to me." " No you came on to my kid." I don't blame the guy for looking out for number one. There were probably many other signs that things were wrong. Once you get labeled as a child predator, you can kiss your life goodbye. Its scary when you think about it. Its something that men intrinsically have to deal with. We have to never put ourselves in a position we can be taken advantage of in this way. A single allegation of misconduct will ruin you. Chick's dodge this bullet for the most part. But they have higher odds of being victim's in other areas. Just god's way of dishing out the equality.

[@michibmoon]

@@12carla4 It's really just a damaging situation on all ends. It's not as easy as it sounds to tell someone that you're being abused, especially if it's by someone you should love. I fully blame the parents for this one, they saw the warning signs that she was abused ALL throughout her childhood and up to her adulthood, they neglected to care for their children.

[@BrenTenkage]

me and my sis are adopted, my grandparents adopted me from my biological mother (Really, REALLY Dodged a bullet given how she turned out), my sis is from another family, we turned out great, and I now appreciate them more and am glad we turned out great, hell my sis for a time did get into some drugs due to some bad relationships but we all supported her and she has been a year and a half clean ^_^

[@epipsychidionozymandias5021]

I'm glad for your sister!

[@hangtime5937]

Bren Tenkage I am also happy for your sister and you!

[@tillyhossain1049]

I have a similar thing, I have been adopted my my step grandparents. First I was with my mum and my half brothers dad, and then my dad couldn’t be our legal guardian anymore because my mum told lies about him that he abused us. Luckily me and my siblings got adopted by his parents, so he lives in the same house as us

[@mrFiiSKiiS]

"holding him without letting go" Had to do that with my son who developed attachment disorder from his mother entering and dipping out of his life several times. Sometimes just to restrain him from his attempts to attack his sister or grandma or me. He's finally largely growing out of it thanks to intense therapy and medication. He sees a regular counselor once a week in a non-standard format where they just go hang out for at least an hour, often more. Guy is a godsend. Son still has the occasional outburst, but is able to recognize them and control himself better, often calming himself down and apologizing within minutes, when before the tantrums would last hours on end, usually only stopping when his adrenaline ran out and he crashed, holding me tightly, crying softly that he was sorry before passing out for hours. I love my son with all my heart, and it's been hard, but it's been amazing seeing him coming out from the other side. I don't begrudge people who couldn't make it there, though. He was far from the worst, and it was often a topic of conversation if he needed to be in a group home.

[@ZoeThomson00]

I had to stop watching after the story about the wife dying in a car accident and the kid being sent back and is now a criminal. I feel bad for all of them and it hurts my heart to think about it.

[@cindy03709]

Imagine the heart break that kid had... Feeling like he did something wrong

[@addisond.3678]

My two sisters were adopted from Ethiopia and they are absolutely amazing dont let this scare you put of adoption, not all of them turn out bad

[@oceancurl]

Why do I get the feeling that not all these parents are as innocent as they are portrayed?

[@cindy03709]

Most this parents haven't gone through hard times and it shows

[@rachelhallie7483]

Oh I'd believe it. People are biased towards their own innocence.

[@problematicprincess6270]

I know its obvious they are shitty too

[@Tofu.987]

thank you!!! there's always 2 sides of the story even if the child qas problematic, if the parents were 100% as honest and loving as they are describing themselves to be none of them would have turned out as bad.

[@maisiethebabyspider9229]

@@cindy03709 best comment! My mum worked in a crappy kindergarten and a kid in her class had a horrible past and kept stealing knives (during lunch time, from the teachers' table, before they realised it) and tried to stab my mum. Was horrible to the other kids. Really really needed help (mum called child protection services etc). He's one of the many other broken children my mum had to deal with. Never ever in my life I've heard her saying anything bad about them ("waste of time".... wtf). Ofc she's not her mother and always came home to a normal household, but she stayed with kids like this every single day for decades. These people are ridiculous.

[@oldwoman5942]

My friends adopted a 6 month old baby and he was trouble from day one. They tried everything, even medication. He is now a drug addicted homeless person and they expect a call one day to let them know he had died. They weren’t told he was fetal alcohol affected and drug affected.

[@alice9787]

EyeAr WeeTawTed im sorry what? you can see that your nephew is struggling so you dump him to die. you're literally saying that you see he'll get bullied, and possibly commit suicide, and you're not doing anything about it. you're sitting there and posting it all over social media instead of trying to help him. how disgusting.

[@leaflet7738]

abi kerr im not saying what their doing is right but its not their kid. That kid is not their responsibility and not everyone has the means to help. For all you know this person is a teenager. You can't just assume you know the full scope of the situation from a little excerpt of their lives.

[@cynicalsoup8134]

EyeAr WeeTawTed I feel so bad for that kid, I still hope he can have as good as a life as possible.

[@nessianbby]

@@spacejesus6581 he is 2 years old! You have no clue how he might turn out. I hope you at least act affectionately/respectfully when he is around and not cold/distant, kids can pick up on that. He is only 2. People can and do live life with disabilities, it's difficult, but it can be done. There's no reason to start stacking things against him before he's even lived.

[@rachelhallie7483]

@@spacejesus6581 This is a self-fulfilling prophecy bound to happen. People rise to what others expect of them. You treat this kid like his life is an inevitable trainwreck and refuse to love him because of that, he will pick up on it and like it or not, you will likely make it more likely that he goes down that path. Stop punishing the child for his mother's actions.

[@Hillybilly-Gal]

This is an 'almost adoption story'. In 2003, me and my late husband was told by one of his co-workers, he knew of a little girl the same age as our daughter(9) that needed a forever home. So, we went and talked to the adoption workers at the group home and met the girl and she would of passed as our daughters'' twin! They looked that much alike! We got to know this dear child and she would look forward to seeing us and always whisper to us, I hope you are my mommie and daddy, someday. So, after a year of fighting to adopt this adorable child, we got turned down due to the location of our home, which was way out in the country. The court said, they felt that the child would not be able to have all of the 'experiences' that other children would have, by living in a city, no matter how small. Never mind, this child would have a sister and brother, horses to ride and acres of mountains and pasture and farm land to live and play on, and pets. Never mind she would of been loved by grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins. Nope, country life isn't for adoption, according to Kentucky Courts. Almost a decade later, we get a surprise call from one of the ex-workers of the group home. She told us, that the girl had aged out of the home and she was put on the street. We told the worker find her and give her our telephone number, and that was the last we ever heard from the ex-worker. No, the girl never called. Me and my late husband, both thought she probably thought-wrongly-we didn't want her. It still breaks my heart today, knowing that young woman could of had a loving home and the courts thought different.

[@alexe.8224]

I would adopt a child. Yes there are traumatized childen who will never be the same. But I think of cases like Gabriel Hernandez or those black brothers who were pretty much starved almost to death. These children need homes too.

[@JustBored589]

Alex E. Yes Gabriel! Such a sad story!!!

[@alexe.8224]

@@JustBored589 exactly. So many kids like Gabriel stuck in the system. If I can provide this for them, why not?

[@tejaswoman]

To the one who says that his mother's friends experience turned him off the idea of adoption forever, and anyone else who feels that way after watching this: such cases are a fraction of adoptions, a small fraction, and they keep hundreds of thousands of kids per year from being adopted out of the foster care system despite being eligible. Many of these horror stories are from cases in which kids were adopted from Romanian or Russian orphanages during a period in which we now know they were deprived of any kind of love, care, affection, and nearly every basic need, producing profound reactive attachment disorder. But again, that's a fraction of cases, and a lot of them explained by adopting from systems that clearly produced a generation of terribly troubled kids. Don't let these outliers turn any of you against adoption in general, and particularly adoption of older kids. Even where the Foster system is doing its best, it was never intended to be a lifelong solution, but merely a stopover on the way to a permanent home, whether through reunions with the biological family or adoption. For each terrible story like this, there are hundreds of beautiful ones, many of which I personally know. Please don't judge adoption by the worst outcomes.

[@nothanks1239]

I feel more sorry for those kids than the adoptive parents, Tbh. Imagine being screwed over by your biological parents so you're messed up and then even your adoptive parents don't want/love you. The system let those kids down, big time.

[@bry4117]

Gemma Whatley it’s not always that the adoptive parents dont love the children, sometimes it’s just that the adopted child simply isn’t safe to be in the home any more. Not all children have empathy, especially ones who have experienced extreme trauma. Some of the children just aren’t capable of loving the adoptive parent and are hell bent on destroying the parents simply because they adopted them. That has been the case with my mother and my brother. My mother has done nothing but love all 3 of her adopted children, and 2 of us turned out just fine, but some children, like my brother, just can’t get past their trauma and want to inflict the trauma they experienced onto everyone else, and no parent should have to just sit there and accept it

[@luciferswaltz]

@@bry4117 yes , but you cant just blame them for that trauma, trauma fucks your brain up, it fucks up your thinking, it makes you do crazy stuff that may harm others, but its not their fault. so you cant really just ,, whole-y blame them for that , idk , trauma just fucks people up so much sometimes Im sorry for your brother, i hope he meets someone who helps reduce his trauma inflicting someday

[@lulufufu7139]

@@luciferswaltz These kids needed mental help, not adoption. Like the adoption system just isnt equipped to handle severely trraumatized kids and often times, agencies hide their trauma so they get afopted and suprise, suprise...they get returned. Its not their fault but its also sometimes not the parents fault because they just cant handle these kids. I wish we had more mental care facilities specifically for abused kids.

[@luciferswaltz]

@@lulufufu7139 yeah ,, but then again even for like , kids with parents , mental care facilities and therapy is still hard to get as its either expensive , or the parents dont care about mental health. so tbh ? its just the system's fault mainly

[@lulufufu7139]

@@luciferswaltz yea thats my point. mental care needs to be way more normalized and become affordable

[@lexivilla3199]

I have 3 adopted siblings, pain the asses, but completely fine children. I understand that there are bad apples, but don’t let videos like this scare you away if you are considering adoption. It’s one of the BEST decisions my family has ever made and I wouldn’t have it any other way 💖

[@hytare]

I feel a lot of this parents didn’t see the adopted children as theirs. In my country it’s really hard to adopt, almost impossible, you do not give them back if they are “defective “ like a broken toy. I don’t like this at all. So you only want to adopt if it’s a perfect baby, so it fits your family right away and happily ever after. You don’t actually want to help a child who needs a new life. Obviously, this is not for every parent in this video

[@Asbestoslover666]

I mean, I dont think they expect a 'perfect' baby... I think they expected the child not to try to murder or gravely assault the rest of the family. As long as the parents tried everything to help the child, then I don't blame them for wanting to return the child or regretting it.

[@vampandazg.5740]

Considering that parents would and have reacted the same way to their biological children trying to murder them and or assaulting their siblings, I see nothing wrong with that. You um should never put children in danger to bbn prove you can cope with a troubled child. If they are abusing others they need inpatient t therapu

[@maisiethebabyspider9229]

hytare I agree with you

[@yucol5661]

I mean what do you do when it’s your biological child? You ignore them and wait fir them to grow

[@danielazafra4137]

I think the same way, in my country you cannot just give the child back however off course is the kid is going to like murder you or something there are options and there’s a lot of ways to help the kid (I get that they don’t have that in other places) but you can’t return them

[@johnkendall6962]

The one where he said the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree. I know what he means. I have 2 sons that are adopted. They never acted the way he said the to twins did but in both cases I knew their birth parents. Some of their behavior is the same as actions I had seen in their natural parents. You hear that the tree grows the way the twig was twisted but like my father said no matter how you twist a pine it doesn't become an oak The same fire that chars wood tempers steel.

[@criert135]

Guff. Children are shaped by how they are raised, first and foremost.

[@fatimareyes7655]

These stories are mostly to blame on the system. I get they must be desperate to place these children with families, but the fact that they actively lied to their to-be parents about the children's past, or failed to make sure they were right for the task is just unforgivable.

[@Jane_Friday]

It is common practise...sadly...

[@Qweb127]

The first one was insane

[@auto._]

Horrible just horrible how do you even think of stuff like that at such a innocent age

[@BhappyD]

DO NOT SUBSCRIBE YEET It just goes to show how horrific the effects of trauma and abuse can be on an undeveloped brain. It’s absolutely heartbreaking.

[@yucol5661]

@@auto._ 😂 that’s not a one in a thousands kids thing. Violence against family, stealing, running away and looking oft older people’s attention online is not a once in a lifetime thing😅. It’s just that when the child is not adopted they just send them to jail and you forget about them. The adoption part made little difference. If anything it made the parents try harder

[@thelivingliver6715]

it was wholesome at the end though. she got better

[@Jiffy-Liffy7714]

@@thelivingliver6715 hopefully she’s getting better as the days go by

[@auraluna7679]

I was a foster child and I behaved horribly to my aunt and uncle who took me in. ( Running away, hurting them emotionally, lying, ) Until today I have psychological issues like anger Problems and other stuff. My family was wonderful and did their very best in raising me. I could have been much worse then I am now but I will never be a normal functioning adult regardless. I am grateful for all they've done, love them very much and regret my misbehavings.

[@skyironplow4158]

Ours has been a nightmare. All the love, therapy, attention, time. Nothing prepared us for the heartbreak. Emotionally draining living in fear of a teenager with so many behavioral issues. He turned 20 and we forced him to move out, we feel guilt for failing him, but we have been shattered and are still afraid of him. We hope one day, he will be able to function and have a decent life.

[@bry4117]

Ciel Ironplow im sorry you had this experience:( in some cases though the child simply does not want to be saved, no matter how much work you put into trying to help them. at the end of the day, it sounds like you guys did all you could do.

[@yucol5661]

Yeah it sounds like you had a tragic but normal parent experience. Some families have this happen, at least you are not alone and can talk to others in a similar situation

[@cindy03709]

I'm not adopted or anything but when I was 14 as a teenage girl I started to rebel. I was horrible, my parents were there the whole time holding my hand even when I said the ugliest things... I'm a great person now but if my parents weren't there idk how I would had turned out... Now imagine this children going through their rebellion without someone holding their hand... Teaching them how to act, how to have compassion, getting their heart broken over and over again.. People returning them like their a purchase... No fucking wonder they are the way they are. They were taught to not fall in love

[@danielazafra4137]

Fr, I am adopted and my mom was absolutely amazing through my rebellious years I can’t imagine what would my life look like now if she had decided to “return” me... hell nah (thanks mom I love you)

[@michibmoon]

Bruh, everyone has a rebellious phase. Rebellion and mental disorders are two separate things entirely. Although, I get what you mean by all the parents should've been prepared and loving.

[@lulufufu7139]

There's rebellion and theres molesting and physically assaulting other children. The adoption system is broken but, maby adoptive parents are lied to about the extent of the abuse kids face so they wind up having to return them because they fear for their other children and their own safety

[@ravenID429]

Ummm, these stories are a LITTLE worse than “rebellion”. The parents have every right to take them back when they’re this messed up, that’s not their responsibility, there’s nothing they can do to help, and they shouldn’t have to sacrifice everything.

[@cindy03709]

@@ravenID429 as a parent it is

[@madelinejane8685]

I’m not going to a fair amount of these just annoy me. Are people just unaware of the trauma that kids who are adopted are likely to have?? Or what

[@Jackylification]

This though! There’s several that had signs of serious abuse but it was ignored and then just put down to ‘welp, we were sold a lemon’ like what the shit??

[@gabbycraft7035]

The second story made me really mad...

[@cindy03709]

This is only my opinion... A lot of the people that adopt have to well of and most of them come from good homes. So, they do not really know how things that children that come from bad homes can be or think... People can be compassionate but not empathetic

[@bry4117]

In my case, our social worker completely lied to my mother about my brothers issues and any time my mother noticed something was off with him, she was told he just needed a little “extra love” but that he would get over his issues. Sometimes the parents are just truly led blindly into adopting a child with issues they are unprepared to handle. It’s not necessarily always the parents fault. Social workers can be very dirty about covering up a child’s issues in order to get them adopted quicker.

[@papiliodemoleus5364]

@@cindy03709 have you actualy every tried adopting? Sometimes you are getting very little time with them and the state just doesn't tell you things like if the child has trauma or mental illness. Sure you may blame them for not being ready but who would? It's very funny to think that by seing these stories of the parents being threatened you wouldn't get out. It may not seem nice but it's how it is. Thinking that you would be different or even have a 'better' way of dealing with it is false. We have the chance to see these stories now but when it's happening and you feel like you and the rest of your family's life is in danger fight of flight just kicks in. We aren't buddhas and it's human nature and instinct to self-preservate. These parents are just human after all. Im sorry If my vords seem hurtful but it's just annoying seeing you everywhere around the comments section complaining about the parents as if you could have done a better job and therefore are superior. I realy dispise seeing this 'higher morality' way of thinking.

[@NihonRebooted]

Ah yes, time for my bedtime stories

[@helin8982]

relatable lmaooo

[@beatrixthegreat1138]

My mom regrets adopting my middle brother. He steals and as a kid set fire to things. My parents tried to get him help but we think he was born with problems. But it didn’t help that my parents had issues too.

[@yeetonyagrave3391]

I hope everything will turn out good I wish the best for you and your family ❤️

[@yucol5661]

Nah, those are not inheritable traits (stealing and setting things in fire). That’s bad parenting or just out of their knowledge and control. Not all parents can know how to deal with every behaviors problem but they will stop trying if they shuck it up to be an inherited thing

[@ravenID429]

@@yucol5661 Uh, yeah, it can absolutely be inherited. Biological parents with severe mental problems, or drugs during pregnancy. How the hell are you blaming the adoptive parents??

[@georgecurtis6463]

Im adopted. My parents loved me. Just a lucky guy.

[@sportluver98]

The first one sounds like that movie with the girl pretending to be a kid from Russia and getting adopted

[@hyacinthbucket5062]

and being a women in her 30's with a growing disorder

[@justcallmelucky]

I thought so too

[@nathanz6265]

Orphan right? That movie was f*cked up! Worst part is when she snapped her arm in the vice.

[@margaridaferreira8029]

@@nathanz6265 worst part is that the movie is based on a true story!

[@nathanz6265]

@@margaridaferreira8029 I know! It totally scared me when I was like 14. I looked at my mother and told her she wasn't allowed to adopt any siblings for me🤣

[@singer2be256]

Last year, we adopted a jack russel that had been found in the house of drug dealers who also bred her to sell her babies. She's a dog, not a human, but she clearly has trust issues. Normally very affectionate, she'll snap and bite you if you try to pick her up, and any type of loud noise makes her run and hide in the nearest small, dark corner. If this is how a dog is after being abused, I can only imagine how a human child would handle it.

[@c.s1393]

That's sad

[@Martina-Kosicanka]

My sister has a shelter dog. He was a puppy when we picked him. It should be a foster care at first, so we said we pick some puppy, they have problem dealing with to help them. He was very fragile and other dogs bullied him, so the only way, they could feed him was somebody had to feed him from the hand. He is very sweet with adults and other animals, but could snap at children. He is also very neurotic, fears many things, especially lound noises, traveling by car and has digestive problems his whole life.

[@amandaredd3057]

A lot of these poor babies suffer from RAD because that NECESSARY bond that's formed at birth and through the first couple of years of life with their mothers is absent and therefore they can't form bonds later with anyone really. I'm a pediatric nurse and have seen enough of it to last a lifetime. It's so devastating to their lives and so unfortunate to see them struggle.

[@chelseaward5610]

When people would joke on me in grade school for being adopted, I would always respond with “yeah, well my parents picked me, yours are stuck with you. “

[@BlandSpagetti]

I think I speak for everyone here when I say why the hell am I watching this

[@nobodyimportant5025]

Well I was cleaning and listening to this sooo

[@thelivingliver6715]

nah i actually have a reason. its useful information to me

[@astridl1848]

Also, as others have pointed out, cases like these are prime examples of why abortion and birth control should be legal, accessible, and destigmatized. We can't even track how many lives have truly been destroyed by these unwanted, disturbed delinquents, even in their childhood, never mind in their adult criminal careers. Bad genes can't just be "loved" or prayed away. Even worse, their own experience will be horrific and filled with suffering if they're the resented, burdensome results of cruelly forced pregnancies and births. No one should be forced to go through any of that against their will. It's hard and traumatic enough when you WANT to have a baby.

[@boomoon584]

And this is why potential adoptive parents need to be taught about trauma, trauma responses, what to do and avoid when bonding with the kid, etc

[@selgomezfan1rcw]

I feel bad for the girl who slit her wrists. Like I'm sorry that's depression and that is how suicidal depression works. They gave up so easily. It can get better.

[@Ignasimp]

As a gay guy who wants to adopt (in the future) this is quite discouraging.

[@reisun6894]

Fostering is also a choice.

[@AudreyLudlow]

It is a gamble, that's for sure. But I know of families who adopted, and kids who were adopted. Most of them are lovely and happy, but the one who got abused as a kid has a story similar to those in the video, with aggression, running away, etc. All you can do is take you time to know the kid before adopting, and hope for the best. Good luck!

[@nbucwa6621]

I mean biological kids are also a risk. If you doubt that search for the reddit about parents who disowned their kids. You could have a kid who is a peadophile, a psychopath, or needs caring for the rest of their life due to deficits. Whatever you choose, fostering, adoption or having biological kids, all kids are a risk. If you really want to be a parent then you need to be aware and able to accept that.

[@Ignasimp]

@@nbucwa6621 there is no comparison though. Far more adopted kids have problems due to trauma, fetal alcohol syndrome, or others. And some kids that would have any problem otherwise, have it because they feel their adoptive parents are not their parents.

[@Ignasimp]

@@reisun6894 to me fostering would be too hard emotionally speaking.

[@lemonsky5378]

I remember seeing a TV show back in the 80s about children being adopted from horrific Romanian orphanages. It was portrayed as some wonderful act of charity. A couple of years later, the same show had a follow-up episode about these same orphans terrorizing their adoptive families. It turned out they were horribly neglected, even abused, at the orphanages. It was the same story for some Russian children. Several years ago, I read a newspaper article about a woman and her husband going through a Catholic charity to adopt a child from Europe. The woman actually did all the work - meeting and interviewing kids, dealing with red tape, etc. There was a pair of siblings that had to be adopted together. The girl was sweet and adorable. The brother had serious emotional issues and was violent. Needless to say, they weren't adopted. The woman ended up adopting an Eastern European girl. I'm not sure how that worked out.

[@hdillz]

As someone who is adopted I just came here to see if my parents were talking shit about me 🤣

[@wellthen4128]

They are, but they used a throwaway🤣

[@tylerchaney9619]

This is just sad...

[@thelivingliver6715]

at least the endings for some of the stories are good. likethe first and second one. the first one the kid got the help they needed and still love their family and the second one op’s lover still loved them despite being accused of such a horrible thing

[@tinamarienelson8469]

My nephew is adopted and it’s one of the horror stories. He sees a psychiatrist, a therapist and they go to family counseling. They’ve tried medicating him, not medicating him but they still have to call the cops on him a couple times a month because he’s out of control. He’s 11. I have a friend that adopted two children and they have a wonderful daughter and a troubled son. Bipolar and a bunch of other stuff. I guess it can go either way.

[@pamelaj3214]

Can’t exactly have a family that leaves the doors unlocked, goes camping every weekend, has everyone wear cute Christmas sweaters that they put on cards every year take in a child that’s been through extreme trauma. They won’t know how to handle it or know what to do. Despite good intentions, it just won’t end well. 9/10 the kid will be taken back into foster care and come out worse for wear feeling abandoned yet again. I want to adopt in the future, but I’m also getting my Master’s in Psychology, particularly with an interest in aiding children. Not saying that will make me the perfect parent, but I’ll at least know what to expect and take extra precautions rather than go in totally blind sighted. It sounds like a lot of these adoptive parents waited years before actually getting the child help, and that is just unthinkable to me.

[@Lila_166]

I was adopted. My mother wanted a child and my dad originally thought he didn’t want kids, but came around to the idea. They were about 45 when they married each other. Raising me as a toddler was tough because I had undiagnosed ADHD that make my behavior difficult. It was pretty okay from ages 9-12 but when I turned 13 I started acting out like some of these kids. After a bunch of life changing experiences, I started my road to recovery from depression and anxiety. I am 21 now and thriving. My family and I are happy together and no longer stressed. I appreciate them and all that they have done and will do for me. 💖

[@Tofu.987]

I'm adopted. my adopted parents still have rights over me, but for the last 4 years I've been in and out of group homes/facilitys/foster homes. I'm also 16 now. I think it's absolutely horrible that people who adopt/foster can just drop their kids off at a police station or shelter and say they don't want them anymore. there are going to be kids with issue due to neglect/abuse and an infant or child. I'm 100% sure that's most of these parents or bio kids of parents writing these are not telling the full side of the story, only the parts to make them look like angels who adopted demon children. Also, did anyone know when someone adopts unless their parental rights get terminated they will get monthly checks until that child is 18? that's a major reason my adopted parents won't sign off rights. i haven't seen them since 2018. its just disgusting how the foster/adoption system works. kids aren't something u should just throw away when they get to much to handle.

[@tochie-ugorji2021]

You're so right! Children are human beings, not rubbish you can throw away!

[@ettinakitten5047]

The monthly checks thing is pretty rare. Mostly only foster parents get money, not adoptive parents.

[@ravenID429]

So you didn’t listen to the part where the kids in these stories destroyed the families’ lives? You’re blaming them for “giving up”?!

[@FuzzyDreamin]

This is why abortion should be supported and advertised as a good option, better to not exist than to live through hell

[@Ellie-vc5ow]

I feel so bad for most of these kids...

[@megannicolefoster]

My mother’s coworker likes to help children in need, she adopted her special needs son, but she helped a friend adopt two sisters, one 12/13 the other 15/16 and the mom and younger daughter bonded but the older sister rebelled and the mom ended up giving up on the older sister and turned her into a facility and gave up her rights and it was so sad around Christmas. My mother and her friend try to get the sister things but the facility limits her items since she’s on suicide watch. The little sister would even taunt the older one that mommy likes her better...

[@gangcheng6316]

This just breaks my heart.

[@thelivingliver6715]

at least the endings for afew of them were wholesome

[@EvilPaladin11]

There's some REALLY rough statements about the adopted kids. The harshest one is the "better to have been in a hospital drain" one. Though to be fair, from the sound of things, that probably would have been the best alternative to the unwanted pregnancy.

[@hothotheat3000]

A family friend and his wife have a bio kid, as well as an adopted kid who was never fully accepted by the husband’s extended family because she wasn’t biologically related. They were never comfortable with acknowledging her as a daughter. The paternal grandparents would introduce the kids as “my granddaughter and her friend”. Cousins would play with her, but the adults in the family would “correct” them and say “that’s not your cousin”. The bio kid was obviously favored, getting invited to parties, going on road trips, receiving nicer gifts for Christmas, while the adopted kid was treated as a step below. They weren’t overly hostile or nasty, but they just didn’t feel comfortable calling the adopted girl family. I think at one point someone said something to the effect of “I can’t pretend this is my relative when she’s not”. Eventually, it caused a lot of turmoil in the family, with the couple demanding the adopted child be accepted or else they’d go no contact, and the rest of his family calling their bluff. They’ve gone NC, and the bio daughter is furious that she can’t see her grandparents anymore. She’s blaming the adopted girl for “ruining my family”, adopted girl feels like it’s her fault, and it’s just not a happy household. They’d never admit it aloud, but I think they wouldn’t adopt her if they could go back in time. They’ve missed big family events like the husband’s sister’s wedding, and the bio kid has been isolated from people she loves.

[@jaidengames26]

I think people need more sympathy for adopted children. Many of them have extreme mental issues and are often not adopted. Saying you regret adopting them is probably a adopted persons biggest fear they often suffer from ptsd and most people don’t understand them.

[@zealwarriorgaming5315]

That 2nd story really pissed me off, that guy who was the biological child gets blamed by his parents and institutionalised for his last teen year because of his adopted sisters behaviour and bs. Hope he never supports his parents ever again.

[@johanna8932]

My Mom works with lots of Kids that have similar behavior issues and with love, patience and humor most children can be helped. She has lots of abuse cases in her special needs class and she likes even the most complicated ones (that you have to hold down with three people for them to not hurt others, that Drink alcohol/do drugs at 13). I think most people just aren't prepared for the child to act out like that. We never adopted any of the children but I met many of them and they were just nice playing with Toddler-Me. When I heard what some of them went through I was shocked how well most turned out. But if the good environment is gone (Graduation/ legal adults doing what they want) some would have needed more than just a good school but a good home as well.

[@bemeeklezvelveeta6719]

Some of these peoples reasons are really hurtful as someone who was never adopted out of foster care. Like damn, didn't know someone would decide to not adopt a kid if they'd known that kid had been molested or they suffer from adjustment disorders. If you don't know the extent neglect and abuse can go to and the impact it can have, then learn before you adopt. It's pretty rare that children who need adopted *weren't* abused and neglected.

[@dollface1472]

So many of these children went through trauma and didn’t get the help they needed.

[@peanutwater607]

For the one of the mom adopting all of the cousins, imagine having the nerve to accuse someone of your crappy life after they sacrificed so much so that you wouldn't get separated from your siblings, smh

[@criert135]

Except you don’t know what actually happened in their upbringing. Also, it sounds like the mother was irresponsible to try and raise so many children when she couldn’t handle that number.

[@skeltheshapeshifter2697]

These people: **pouring out their heart and soul to tell about some of the worst experiences of their lives** People in the comment section: "But you're not a parent, therefore your story is invalid!!!1!!11"

[@kerricaine]

i don't think this is exactly the case, but my grandparents. they adopted my mother thinking they couldn't have children, only to have my aunt a year or two later. they might not have regretted adopting my mum, but even from what i see to this day, my aunt definitely got preferential treatment, and it took a long time for mum to stop resenting her sister.

[@gingerwest8392]

The one at like 10:45, they act like the birth mother lied to them but sometimes things just happen. Maybe she did drugs behind their backs, but maybe she didn't. If she's still swearing up and down years later I would just get over it. It's possible that even a biological child can have problems like that. I get that it's scary. The problems are more common with drug use during pregnancy, but it's something everyone should prepare for if they are having kids, biological or adopted.

[@gingerwest8392]

Also i don't mean that you should put yourself in danger with kids or get over that your child is wack I meant get over like just accept that maybe the birth mom is telling the truth but even if she's lying that doesn't change the situation. Sorry if that was confusing

[@GeoGamerArtistVlogger]

I'm adopted and (I'm absolutely sure) there are times when my parents regret adopting me and my sister (different birth parents, no one in my immediate family is blood related at all) cuz what my parents werent expecting to come along with me was ADHD, autism, accidentally bringing knives to school (I like to whittle and would often do so in my school uniform, placing the covered blades in my pocket when I went to go do something else and completely forgetting it was there and realizing I have a knife in my pocket in the middle of class the next day), a month-long stay at a mental hospital, an obsession with dragons, unfinished projects, lots of counseling and meds (for ADHD, depression, and a screwed up menstrual cycle) and a lot of other things.

[@karanhdream]

A couple across the street of my mum's place adopted two siblings and considering things, they are doing so well! The younger one was only 3 months old so... not much time for life altering trauma and as far as we know nothing beside hygiene issues because her parents changed her diaper once every 24h. The older one though (4 yrs old)... His bio parents stuffed him full of junk food and sweets whenever he'd get fussy to shut him up and never gave him a bedtime schedule. He's much better now thanks to his adoptive parents' efforts and therapy 😊 He just might turn out okay I hope

[@relaxwithrats9598]

My adopted half brother has trichotillomania, schizoaffective disorder and was in and out of juvie and prison for years for stealing money, a motorcycle and somehow getting hold of a gun (in the uk no less). We have no contact but I really really hope he's okay and that his life turned around.

[@kayleesmerbeck3197]

18:00 what you mean earn tv etc? Like kid was already having trust issues so make it worse also regretting giving someone literacy yeah. Also you think being a parent to a child with a disability is hard try having the disability. Sorry gotta protect people from autism speaks.

[@karolinapupi19977]

My former co worker was a foster parent for a 3 year old girl. He already had 7 kids and one of them adopted. But for some reason him and his wife couldn't stand that little girl, he lept saying how she is just too much and they cant handle it. So sad

[@LegoSwordViedos]

This is just all around sad I feel like I'm on the verge of crying.

[@12carla4]

I don't think it should be legal to leave this kids without the psychological help they clearly need and to pretend that their new parents will know what to do

[@sarahcameron38]

I’m not a mom or a sibling but I am a friend of someone who had adopted a little boy from Russia. He spoke no English and the orphanage he was at they would abuse the kids. My friend who adopted him was told he was healthy and a loving kid but everyone at the orphanage would pick on him. So my friend adopts him and she loves him. She told me one day that he eats everything and I mean everything...you could give that kid a 30 pound turkey and he would eat it all in a second and still be hungry. But then she started telling me that he wasn’t a “normal” child...so I went over to her house and we had a pretty fun day. We were hanging out in the living room when he starts throwing a fit (which is normal for children but he was around 9 or 10 and he was very small like he was the height of a 6 year old) but it wasn’t any old normal fit...he ran to the kitchen trying to grab a knife so I ran over as my friend held the boys arms so he could not grab the knife. Later that day she took him to the doctor where they found out he had some brain problems. I felt bad for the kid and my friend but she just couldn’t take it anymore. She had to return him and after that she wasn’t the same she was very depressed. The kid did more things than grab a knife and try to cut us with it but I don’t want to make this too long.

[@justanotheronlineobserver3387]

Im I the only one that was cought off guard when a 12 YEAR OLD got pregant? How is that on her? She is 12!!! 17:04

[@frankenwaifu8092]

Either I stay childless for the rest of my adulthood or I just adopt an orphan and slash 3/4 of my lifespan and turn the remainder into a horror movie

[@catrocastre8215]

That's my plan too! Get an outdoors survival course, run a summer camp, haha, just to be prepared for extrovert kids, cus I'm introvert and have done all that is introvert. Haha, jus joking, mostly.

[@idkman2633]

The guy returning the kid when his wife died. And no one ever adopting the kid again. Fucking hell.

[@krispyrice1751]

12:18 they act like he was like yes let me be born fucked up when it wasn’t his choice he didn’t choose to be born or have so many mental problems it makes my blood boil when people act like there burdens when they are people to no matter their mental issues

[@m1nc3m3at]

“See, that’s what we do with parents that give us trouble” Sounds more like the kid had an epic sense of humour

[@cindy03709]

I was thinking that... What if that kids just had a dark since of humor and they send him off because of that??

[@Bob23462d]

Depends on how he said that line.

[@OurMoonPrince]

On one hand yeah, but tbh I'd be pretty freaked out if my parents joked about killing me too lol

[@johanna8932]

I think everyone who has/understands dark humor this doesn't seem like a reason to send a child away!! If I would say something like that my Mom would laugh and make a shitty joke

[@Sunny.Jay22]

Sometimes I wish that I had a younger sibling but then I realize that I should be grateful that I live in the safe and stable household that I do unlike some of the people in this video. And I am grateful for my safe and stable household and I also shouldn't take things like this for granted

[@AK-jt9gx]

Saving this to come back to whenever I get baby fever to convince myself that parenting is complicated and impossible to predict

[@ZephyrinSkies]

Some of these stories are so sad because the child's behavior was shaped by trauma and made worse by the adoptive parent's attitudes towards them. I know I will not have the patience and will to deal with damaged children and I get this can wear at your nerves and frustrate you especially if their condition wasn't disclosed, but these really illustrates and makes me appreciate how you really need to have the right reasons to adopt a child and not go in thinking it'll be rosy like the movies. Some of them, from the account at least, sound like they really tried, others were stupidly irresponsible and clueless about supporting child sex abuse victims. The story where the parents held the child when he had tantrums so he wouldn't feel like he'd be abandoned and he improved was so sweet, but the one where the guy gave the child back when the wife died and heard he never found another foster family and acted out in life from the abandonment is just tragic. He probably feels bad about the decision but I can't help but feel like smacking him for it.

[@Jane_Friday]

I work with children from foster Familien and adopted children. Sadly also in my country parents don't get informed about the extend of trauma the kid carries, including alcohol and drug abuse of the pragnent mother. I had more then one case where the kid threatend to kill the foster parents. One six year old stood at his foster dads bed with a big kitchen knife. So many lifes get completely srewed. It is not the fault if these kids, they suffer the most, but the families get completely fricked, too. Because of a history of cancer I cant have children. Due to what I see at work the idea of adopting is absolutely of limits for my husband and me.

[@spicydillpicklechips]

I have two younger adopted siblings who don’t know that they’re adopted. Sadly, their mother did crack thoughout the entirety of both pregnancies and it’s causing behavioral issues now and I know it isn’t their fault but they’re a fucking nightmare and for some reason they hate women. They’ve become so bad after my father passed away that my mother regrets adopting them but she refuses to give them back to the system but she said once they’re of age they have to leave. We know it’s the drugs but they’re the worst people I’ve ever met and I don’t associate with them at all after one attacked me while I was pregnant and the other cursed me out and attacked me and they unbuckled myself daughter’s car seat one day to cause trouble and my daughter almost fell over while we were driving. I’m not very forgiving once my daughter’s safety is involved so I don’t speak to them. My mom keeps asking me what I would do if something were to happen to here and it upsets her that I wouldn’t take them in but my daughter is my main priority and I’m not going to risk her safety for them.

[@archeryangel]

So many of these seem like cases of parents being unprepared to deal with trauma than anything else. Also the way these people talk about abuse/neglect survivers and people with serious developmental/mental health disabilities is frankly gross.

[@oldwoman5942]

My friends adopted a baby boy and weren’t told he had fetal alcohol syndrome as well as being born addicted to drugs. The husband tried really hard to help the boy, the wife not so much. He has been in and out of jail since he was a teenager and is now homeless.

[@yucol5661]

Yeah, I’ve heard there used to be a pretty heavy stigma about such children way back them. Like crack babies, the where treated like subhumans with no future outside of jail since birth. Turns out not all children get any problems (depending on what drug the mother was deducted to, some always cause problems) and not all drugs are the same. it’s pretty useful to know what drug it was for treatment, problems at birth and higher risks of developmental disorders. And sadly many children where treated for symptoms they didn’t even have or for drugs that didn’t cause any withdrawal or long lasting symptoms. The research was also pretty bad and rare (as all drug research is), to the point that many babies would be put in danger from unnecessary treatments and lack of education in doctors. Oddly enough most children would have had problems as adults anyway since most where from poor families so studies on crime, school and behavior didn’t work to show anything (again not a lot of studies nor interest).

[@yucol5661]

If you read this please never see a child from an addicted mother badly. Everyone already expects them to go to jail (yes that was a media set in stone believe) . Your lowered expectations, fear and mistreatment of them will cause more damage than most physical problems or birth deficiencies ever could.

[@Usual2uspect85]

That one that said Dogs don't have souls has clearly never truly loved a Dog, they have the purest souls.

[@ravager0292]

My mother nearly adopted our cousin after his mother died in a house fire, she didn't and we lucked out as it turns out he stole and robbed a lot, it turns out he was a main culprit for starting the fire but ciuldnt be proved and he ended up doing tons of drugs and went to jail, after getting out he got fired from 3 jobs for doing drugs and attacking staff

[@MyNameBeAmazing]

The guy who worked 60+ hours who gave back their kid was stupid af. If that was your biological child you probably have never thought to give your child away. Shame on them!

[@oceana3070]

Yeah the way he said ‘I had to take him back’ made it sound like he was returning a purchase; like he considered the child like an unwanted appliance. So sad

[@tuccerjim3084]

Annie I mean, the court system in the U.S considers minors with the same rights as a fucking couch, without voice or opinions. Just ready to be shipped off to whatever parent the court decides. On a smaller scale, this is no different.

[@MyNameBeAmazing]

Annie parents who say “ it’d be better if they had someone else take care of them” usually means “ I don’t want to put in the extra effort to make my relationship work with them.” Of course it varies from parent to parent but in most cases this is what it means

[@qteefacemcbeauty]

Dude acted like the decision to adopt a child was the same as getting a puppy. WTF. He did more harm than if the kid would have just stayed without ever having been adopted.

[@JR-lq5eh]

Right with him working that much I'm sure he could have cut his hours, or got a babysitter, did he not have family that could have helped watch the kid I know that's not a option for everyone but if you are able to adopt a child financially speaking you should definitely be able to at least pay for child care.

[@andieallison6792]

The comment section is only reenforcing the stigma against being an adoptive parent, TBH. Too many people treat adopting a child like you're adopting a dog or something and that goes for so-called "pro adoption" people. The kind that advocate for adopting or fostering kids over having biological children, and then shame the parents when they vent about how hard it is to be a parent towards children with severe mental illnesses and behavioral/adaptive issues. Parents are people, too.

[@lemonsky5378]

A friend of my paternal grandma's was unable to have biological children, so she adopted a baby boy. This was in the 1950s. She and her husband were probably in their 40s at the time. They were a little old to be adoptive parents back then, but they had some connections. The father died about 10 years later. The mother lavished all her love on her son, who grew up to incredibly selfish. He sounds like a textbook narcissist. He got involved in drug smuggling in the mid- to late 1970s and had to flee town. I'm not sure if he was avoiding the cops or his "friends." His mother went with him. They both ended up going to jail. When my aunt claimed that's what happens when you adopt children, my grandma corrected her. "No, that's what happens when you spoil a child rotten and let him do whatever he wants." Seriously, I know lots of cases where biological children made their parents' lives miserable.

[@briancatoni7000]

People in this video: a child showed very serious signs of extreme truma and acted out due to that truma(that they likely never had real help for)... They're evil and I hate them And also: gross it's disabled send it back

[@yucol5661]

I know, totally unprepared. Some where responsible and tried but if you consider how bad most regular prenatal are at being late at to their own biological children then these stories are pretty in line with regular parents.

[@KitsuneGB-hc9zb]

14:42 Kicked out of elementary school? That’s almost impressive. I was a demented little goblin (thanks aspergers /s) and I made it to high school before being kicked out.

[@sophigiannamore]

i’m really sorry but a lot of these stories deeply bother me referring to the traumatized children as “piece of crap” etc. when that much trauma especially sexual abuse in conflicted on your brain at such a young age that’s what happens they’re not evil.

[@Joniness]

Ok but the story in which she was called a piece of crap was one where the giver of the story was abused by their own parents and had childhood sexual trauma caused by the adopted child. Have some sympathy for them too

[@tsulee7876]

Joniness Yeah, I’m with OP in that story. Besides, the parents didn’t do anything except excuse her behavior. Just because you have trauma, doesn’t excuse any horrible actions you do.

[@OurMoonPrince]

Having metal illnesses doesn't excuse you from being a piece of crap, it only explains it.

[@yucol5661]

@@tsulee7876 no one was excusing anything. You can acknowledge behavior problems and treat them without using it as an excuse. I feel like you are just using it as an excuse to simplify things

[@danielazafra4137]

I’m adopted and honestly some of these stories are not even the child’s fault... I don’t know man if you’re not prepared to receive a child that has been abused or had a terrible life before please don’t do it and don’t return the child unless is a very VERY extreme situation, you have no idea how horrible the kid will feel and how traumatizing that is, imagine being abandoned twice. I’m very grateful for the life my adoptive mom gave me, she is literally the most amazing human being and I was NOT an easy kid to handle now everything is amazing and we are extremely close.

[@iwantsifegold]

I would zero contact with them as soon as I turn 18.

[@byuftbl]

This shouldn’t make people scared to adopt…..you could literally have your own children that turn out to be “regrettable” too….

[@InResponseOutreach]

It’s not even your kid. It’s a kid you’re raising because of your kindness. Not everyone deserves that kindness. Especially if they are hurting you or your family. Send them back.

[@yucol5661]

What t f do you means it’s not your kid??? They are adopted! That’s basically saying “you are how my kid”! I’m not saying that parents shouldn’t Kim out their children to an institution if they are in danger but don’t act like they where in the trial period when this happened

[@asecondago9856]

Adoption can mean any time period, they could've lived one year together or 16. If you separate your adopted children and your biological ones you're not suitable for adoption, either. These kids need a family and not someone doing them a favor because "who else would've taken them in". I'd imagine it's incredibly hurtful to hear "Send them back" like some adopted dog. Adopted children are your responsibility, just as biological ones

[@tuffsmurfen96]

The one who returned the adopted child because the wife died and he worked 60+ hours... Wow, just wow... Would you give your biological child up in that situation? An adopted is not a pet or something you can return! If you have adopted the child, it is yours!

[@Phoebe5448]

I mean I can kind of understand the guy's point too, losing your wife in such a tragic way is really sad and being unavailable to care for a kid. But I don't agree with "so he turned to a life of crime, oh well." The least he could of done was still be in the child's life or at least keep updated. Smh.

[@yucol5661]

I guess that or nets are more familiar with adoption and the system so they feel more comfortable giving their own child to adoption. Still so harsh to give a child that punch in the gut of being double orohaned

[@Shockwave99999]

The entire time I was just waiting for the robot to say the entire plot of “Orphan”.

[@hardcorefairy6534]

not really adopted, but long term fostercare. my aunt was pretty much homeless and my cousin was taken away when he was 12 (right around the time i was born) and my parents were foster parents so they took him in until he turned 18. he was... weird i think he only had adhd but he would scream whenever he went down the stairs to his room, not an scream scream but like yelling like a maniac, but not ear-piercingly loud. he was kinda fucked up, but he was like a brother to me.

[@thesunlessway]

One day one of my mum's friend told me that her brother and SIL who could't have children fostered a little girl with the intention to adopt her, but CPS "forgot" to tell them she was sexually abused. She immediately started to act inappropriately towards her foster father and tried to set the couple one agaist the other so she could have him only for herself. In a few weeks she was sent back and they never tried to adopt again.

[@AudTheGod]

My cousin and his wife couldn’t conceive so they adopted a half brother and half sister. My cousins are white and the kids they adopted are black. My cousin’s wife is slowly learning to do her new daughters hair and its been amazing. They are wonderful kids (adopted at ~8 and ~11 I think)

[@Eroderen]

I have 16 adopted family members and my cousin is crazy. She asked me if I’d eat someone and then told me her bf wanted her to eat him when he died, then she asked to keep a dead rabbit she found in the backyard, THEN she asked if there were train tracks nearby and asked if she could sleep on them. There is so much more too 💀