He threw a table across the room... | Autism meltdown story

Subscribe 👉 bit.ly/subKevin...
Join 👉bit.ly/JoinKevi...
Merch 👉 bit.ly/Differen...
First time here? 👉 bit.ly/NewToKev...
Before we go any further - Andy is not in this video, but the video is about him (hence he's in the thumbnail). This is the story of his biggest meltdown in years, which included throwing a table across the room, taking off all his clothes and telling me he wanted to leave home and move back to Nottingham with Anna. This is the first time I've ever had to deal with a meltdown without Anna there to help me, and it was a real eye opener that showed just how much we need her!
Missed yesterday's vlog? Check it out here 👉 • A busy vlog in a very ...
What a difference a year makes! Check out our vlog from this day last year 👉 • HE WON'T EAT CRISPS! A...
Check out what we got up to two years ago today 👉 • 60 Days Left at Work &...
Get to know us - these are our most frequently asked questions 👉 • FREQUENTLY ASKED QUEST...
********************
SUPPORT THE CHANNEL!
Support the channel on Patreon 👉 / lollujo
Where we get all Andy's chewy and sensory toys 👉 www.chewigem.c...
Where I buy most of my shirts 👉 /qwertee
Want to know what equipment I use to make my videos? My full equipment list is here 👉 kit.com/lollujo
Our Amazon Wishlists:
-- Kev's wishlist 👉 tinyurl.com/kev...
-- Anna's wishlist 👉 amzn.eu/7XkAgMn
-- Lucy's wishlist 👉 amzn.eu/8i4JE3i
-- Andy's wishlist 👉 amzn.eu/6TZnxK9
-- Amy's wishlist 👉 amzn.eu/grJ9BnL
-- Dave's wishlist 👉 amzn.eu/dx9JeKk
********************
LET'S CONNECT!
Our Twitter 👉 / chapmanfamilyyt
Our Facebook 👉 / chapmanfamilyyt
Kevin's Instagram 👉 / lollujo
Anna's Instagram 👉 / anna_lollujo
Andy's KZbin Channel 👉 / throughandyseyes
Kevin's Gaming Channel 👉 / lollujofm
Our Gaming Podcast 👉 / maturegamerpodcast
Our PO Box:
The Chapman Family, PO Box 1388, Peterborough, PE1 9US, UK
********************
ABOUT THE CHAPMAN FAMILY
Hello folks and welcome to The Chapman Family! We are Kevin (dad), Anna (mum), Lucy (age 17), Andy (age 14), Amy (age 12) and Dave (around 35 in dog years).
We're daily family vloggers with new videos out at 5pm every day UK time. We vlog about our daily lives, including life as an autism family (Andy is autistic) and lots of nerdy stuff because we just can't help ourselves!
We'd love to have you join us on the road to 100K and share our journey with us! Hit SUBSCRIBE and don't forget to TURN THE NOTIFICATIONS ON!
A BRIEF HISTORY OF THE CHAPMAN FAMILY
When Kevin left his full-time job as a Computer Science teacher in July 2017, Anna was trapped in our house by our son Andy, who is autistic and had refused to go to school for 18 months. Our daughters Lucy and Amy and our dog Dave hardly saw him because he was always working to try and solve all our problems! Today we're full-time content creators and Kevin is always at home when the kids get home from school (all our kids!) and Anna has been able to return to university. This channel is the story of my family's ongoing journey as family vloggers! Previously known as lollujo Vlogs and Kevin Chapman.
********************
DISCLAIMER: This video and description contains affiliate links, which means that if you click on one of the product links, I’ll receive a small commission. This helps support the channel and allows us to continue to make videos like this. Thank you for the support!
#autism #meltdown #autismawareness

[@NoName-yg1ki]

You are not just the stepdad you are the dad plain and simple. There many men who would have ran away years ago and you didn't. You are the father Andy was meant to have. God bless you all.

[@Leahplayzzzzz]

Need to agree with you with that

[@bunchofrandomjunk]

Couldn't agree with you more

[@LoLowashere]

His disclaimer shows he actually cares more about his child than views. He could have easily shown clips of the "stand off" but No. They dont want the views of "looky loos" and people who kist want to see our boy Andy in distressed.... Love this family...

[@thebestwillow]

Glad there's no footage of Andy's meltdown. Sad there's no footage of Andy. Also sad that there are people who watch videos for the purpose of seeing another human being in such acute distress. Also sad that society is so quick to see abuse from a step parent, but so reluctant to see it in a biological parent - my experience is that a biological parent can pretty much get away with doing anything to a child.

[@shirrepoffer]

@@richardpentney8438 Also, if someone sees another parents discipline as bad just because they don't agree with it, it's automatically abuse to them.

[@thebestwillow]

@@richardpentney8438 like I said in my comment, I was speaking about my experience. What the law says about it has no bearing on that.

[@gimbovortek7707]

Why should they show you a post meltdown Andy just for your entertainment

[@emilygg1236]

Gimbo Vortek they shouldn’t that is why they didn’t and that is what they said with their comment

[@izzystuart1181]

You are his dad, may not be biological, but you are his dad. Many men would’ve ran away years before but you’d didn’t. You are Andys dad that he was meant to have.

[@bdavidson5429]

You should probably check through the laptop and Ipad, just to see if there is anything that might be bothering Andy, or that might be something he isn't supposed to be watching/doing besides the settings?

[@hollyreay02]

Wouldn't Andy notice someone had been on his laptop/iPad which might effect him?

[@bdavidson5429]

@@hollyreay02 He may not as long as they leave everything as they found it and do it while Andy is at school or something

[@hollyreay02]

@@bdavidson5429 I do understand what you're saying but Andy is very techsavy and say for example the brightest is different than normal and Kev and Anna realise this by going on it whilst he's asleep or at school and change the brightest to the normal setting. Andy might get upset that it's different and he's not the one that changed it back

[@bdavidson5429]

@@hollyreay02 I get that, but the chances are quite low of something like that happening

[@BoingBoingBang]

Holly Reay Has he ever had a meltdown or been bothered if Kev or Anna touched his gadgets? If hey do it when he’s at school or upstairs he I doubt he’d realise.

[@puggycool]

Is Dave okay!?

[@JoyHatcher]

Poor Andy and Kev. I hope you're feeling better Kev and know that you are an awesome Dad that did a outstanding job with his son.

[@connorwann8832]

As a guy with autism I am the same always playing with things but it just so I know how they work but It kind of gets eazyer with age but you guys are amazing to stick by him

[@JereMechaJohnson]

Hug that boy, Kev! I bet if you tried to be the comforting one when Anna wasn’t around, it would start to feel less awkward. Even if it feels awkward to you, it’d probably help Andy when he’s like that to just be comforted. Understand your position, but I think you could do it!

[@FarazKhan55000]

You guys are way more patient than I'll ever be

[@carrielynch177]

You guys are amazing. Kev you’re his dad. The only one he knows. Don’t feel bad for hugging or doing whatever you need to help him. I truly believe you have his best interest at heart. Anna is just a mom. A great mom. The kind of mom most kids wish they could have. Love you all hope Andy is much better. 👍🏻❤️

[@sarahsrandomvideos6965]

Sorry to hear you had a bad day Andy. Hope you & Dave are ok & hope you have a great half term. 💙💙

[@chyannecook6065]

Some people have double sided pictures for privileges and one side will be the same as the other but crossed out and you can put them up when the picture is not crossed out it is available and if it is than it is not available. For instance a laptop 💻 men’s they can have it but💻🚫 men’s they can’t have it. Like a visual reminder👍

[@williamchilds216]

That's a really good idea. If they had a board up with several cards then they can show which stuff he can do and which he can't do or could have a step-by-step thing with a picture of chores then a picture of the laptop.

[@lucyallen1976]

I just read the title hope everyone is doing ok guys 💗💗💗

[@darcietalbot4705]

I only just realized Andy is older than Amy

[@oliviaelliott1333]

Amy is only 12 but very tall and mature! Andy is only about 5ft’ as Anna is small herself.

[@darcietalbot4705]

I've been supporting them for around 2 years now and Andy has improved massively but I'm almost 12 and I look about 6 so that's why I thought but like you said Amy is very mature and is a great sister

[@mrwheedles5373]

Seeing Andy in distress would feel like watching somebody in agony from a broken leg, they are both equally disturbing to see for me. :( love and support

[@MissChuffer93]

Just remember one bad day does not matter ! His come so far in the last 12 months maybe he is just trying to process it along with those teenage hormones. It can be traumatic for both parties involved but I think you did the right thing letting him just have his moment then taking him out to calm down :) you both do a great job don’t get upset over a meltdown.

[@gemmamills7864]

Hope your all recovering from it well. I really admire you for not showing us any of Andy today. A lot of people might have showed it for views. Well done for being bloody decent human beings.

[@FarazKhan55000]

I am late to this but I got an idea what if you put weights internally in the computer and get a monitor that way he cant lift up the computer

[@beastaree5646]

Great decision not to put the meltdown in the video. There are some horrible people out there who just like to see others in distress. I hope Andy is ok, and it sounds like you did a great job dealing with the situation!

[@fazeviper8482]

I fell sorry for andy and your fam because you have got to go through this (hope it gets better£

[@winterprecious3567]

He didn't want you there in the moment, Kevin, but we know he does other times. I mean, does Anna floss with him?! ;) Lol.

[@lizpond2782]

I could see your distress there talking about handling the situation Kev, from what I've learned, watching your channel, about autism, it seems to me you did the right thing absolutely, all you could do in the chaos, not just in the room but in your head, was keep Andy safe and Andy stayed safe. You and Anna are so fab together, not just with the care of your family but with the care of each other. Props to you both.

[@terrysteventon842]

I hope you& Andy are ok . I have autism as well as Andy I listen to mindfulness music I turn down the lights a bit and Close my eyes and just relax

[@FlappyHandsAndStims]

my main question about this vlog is, who on earth clicks on a video to specifically see a child in distress?

[@kevinchapmanvlog]

At a rough guess, about 2 million people so far when you compare the meltdown video to the next most viewed video on the channel...

[@bencamdej]

Oml I thought he was getting better hope this doesn't set u back from were u started

[@emmabirtles7473]

With working at a austic school we have a lot of meltdowns and they are so hard physically and emotionally u are totally right laughter helps

[@gxa5760]

Thank you for respecting your child's privacy.

[@hellno3041]

GenX Aspie I can't tell if this is sarcastic or not

[@laiiily5503]

@@hellno3041 dont see why it would be

[@gxa5760]

@@hellno3041 Nope. Truly nice that you didn't post meltdown footage, etc. and announced it so the voyeurs can move right along.

[@kirstymcwilliams3736]

You should try and put a password on things he's not allowed

[@nikkib5753]

If you are interested I can help you. Please let me know. I would love to help you all have more peace of mind. I've been through it and was featured on a one hour special on television called Autism, A Success Story.

[@Nikki360PDX]

I agree, white chocolate Twix is horrible. White chocolate M&Ms and white chocolate Reeses Penut Butter Cups are good though!

[@ReclaimOurFreedom]

Why not just make it log into kiosk mode that blocks any other app for opening other than one that you preset Intended for digital displays but we'll work because it can block anything else but whatever browser

[@Tigerlilly9779]

: : omg ... my asd kiddo changes the settings on all our devices as well! I found his ipad set to german one day instead if english. Lol. : :

[@emmacartledge4778]

You are both wonderful parents and Andy is a generally happy young lad all looks better when you chill and smiling and laughter does help.

[@susandevlin4712]

do you think the dept[ of education, social services, people who are supposed to support you, and nuture andy dont really help him.

[@adamcrane3571]

Hello

[@theojames7933]

You kind of triggered that meltdown by nagging him about the settings when you know it was winding him up

[@hayleyrhodes1505]

I am got autism aswhell

[@marksimpkin9490]

Dave in the background sweak sweak sweak ! 🐶😂😂😂

[@jewelreloaded44]

😢 Glad Andy is ok now.... These meltdowns are not pretty. Our Shay usually takes off his headset and snaps it. We've even had him pick up his PS4 and fling it across the room. Once he even threw it in the bath. The downside is the distress he displays is scary and upsetting for all concerned. NOT something you want to watch I can assure you. When he is 'on one' there is no reaching him He is a skinny boy but as strong as an ox. He has to let it out. All we can do is keep him as safe as possible until he eventually calms down...The upside, if there is one, is ALL his tech stuff is insured.

[@jenifer200809]

So sorry he had a meltdown like you said though at least no one got hurt and you guys figured out what set him off.

[@caseyw99]

Poor Dave

[@ReclaimOurFreedom]

Just block the settings with group policy

[@BoingBoingBang]

Is Dave ok?

[@jaimereynolds258]

Sending extra love. Meltdowns can be hard. My son had one the other week. He hadn't had one in a long time. He ended up punching a hole in the bathroom door, slammed his plate down and broke it, punched me in the leg, slammed his head into the metal head board, and repeatedly slams his knee down on the wood floor. It can be extremely draining.

[@hannahwinstone1604]

Oh dear Kev what a horrific experience. Being Autistic myself I have had meltdowns, lost the plot and raged. Hope you and Dave are okay. You remind me of my parents, to begin with they didn't know what to do when I went into Meltdown and it caused a lot of distress and confusion. Now they know to leave me alone and eventually comfort me and talk to me. Sorry Kev I had to laugh at "Liquid holders"

[@momzillainnova]

Im just here to say that you are both doing an amazing job . I feel like you probably just need to hear that right now.....

[@linznlou]

Ishsvdvdgdvhs. C Rhys’s I dbhd cuz dhud dbfhu ex. N s

[@hannahb4347]

Could you get like a really thick rubber laptop case in case he does throw it again so it doesn’t break ? 💙 hugging does always help though. Even if he’s still pushing and fighting to get away just hug him and he will eventually stop. I’m autistic too and this always works for me. 💘💘

[@benwatts5473]

You could try putting on parental control settings which restrict access to the settings.

[@jordangraybill1374]

Ben Watts he wouldn’t like that and probably have another meltdown cause of it

[@oliyt1032]

Hope ur ok ❤️❤️

[@fulcilover]

I’m autistic.

[@twilliamspro]

Kev how do you as autism parents differentiate between Meltdown from stressful situations or Being Naughty. In my childhood if i threw a table I'd have hell to pay

[@marcb8934]

For me growing up people blamed themselves for the behaviours, and saw me as a huge issue just to get rid of. Employers, mum, dad, and people I lived with.

[@gaylemcclelland7002]

Poor Andy

[@realadrieno]

He's now having more meltdown ls more often, what's happening?

[@babychickenstudios]

RealAdrienODeluxe possibly a mixture of Andy going through puberty (as he’s nearly 15) and maybe his meds need going up a little as his weight is going up..hope Andy is ok now ❤️

[@pinapleeggs187]

What dose not having pain receptors mean

[@laiiily5503]

It means that Andy doesn't process pain correctly therefore he cant feel pain. During a flight or flight mode (which andy entered), adrenaline is released into the bloodstream which increases heart rate and increases pain threshold.

[@imaginaryenemy2565]

Fun fact autistic people have abnormal pain tolerances many of them have high pain tolerance so things that would make atypical people flinch, wince and cry they tend to under react to or don't react at all

[@jordangraybill1374]

Some people like me have a very low pain tolerance so that’s not always true that autistic people have a very high pain tolerance

[@imaginaryenemy2565]

@@jordangraybill1374 that's why I said many of them do I didn't say all did

[@marrvids]

Wow, I don’t know what I would’ve done in that situation either

[@ossyshaz]

Sending good vibes guys hope your all ok

[@lesleylaurence6056]

I would recommend a weighted blanket for the pressure he wants. 😁❤️

[@Zulisian]

Yes, a young lad I worked with who had autism had a "blue blankey" he called it, it was heavy af, and it took over a year to build bonds with him as he hated male staff, it got to the point he wanted me to help him with everything from getting ready in the mornings to role playing games, drawing and other things. It felt so awesome breaking down those barriers and teaching him not all males are see you next tuesdays...

[@rwmovies]

@@Zulisian "not all males are see you next tuesdays" what?

[@hollyreay02]

Poor Andy and Dave

[@JayGo1411]

Maybe it’s because Andy feels left out because he cannot make his own decisions unlike his peers who can do so and because of that , Andy could have picked up on it 🤔 it could be anything really

[@mrawesomeshark5268]

Hi

[@brendondonaldson8180]

I completely understand your thought process around the hug thing, you are right and as you were talking about the meltdown my first thought as a dad is go over and grab/hug him but your a 6ft+ BIG man. Would have been completely different end result if Anna had been there. I know you don't care about comments but hey every child is different and no-one can tell you how to rightly handle a situation like that, at least he didn't hurt himself and he is better and calmer now.

[@Fox01294]

With regards to the laptop have you thought about putting remote control program such as TeamViewer to monitor usage and close any programs he clicks on that he shouldn't be on?

[@singingcoversbyeva5293]

Maybe he’s watching something or doing something on it that he knows he shouldn’t be doing and he’s trying to delete the history or something

[@josephmann5336]

Hope everyone is ok😥

[@twilliamspro]

In an attempt at gallows humour andy could be one hell of a wrestler if he's got no pain receptors. That sounds like a back bump.

[@vikky1376]

Kevin... you did a wonderful job with Andy.. with his meltdown.. luv you all

[@jasminegonzalez2007]

You are an awesome dad. Appreciate your channel so much. Love your whole family. God bless. I cried with just the description of the events. You may never know how much you are loved and needed by Andy but please never doubt it.

[@mattstanley8880]

It's always really sad to see Andy in this way. Last year he was on the verge of collecting his student of the year award and this year, having the biggest meltdown ever. I hope he is alright and feeling better, the real superstar is yourself Kevin and Anna, who have to pick up the pieces and throw them back in to make it better for all of you. You both deserve a medal and I'm so so proud of you both 👍👍

[@darcietalbot4705]

Poor andy

[@Pokemonjayy]

So sorry to hear about the meltdown, you both did your best hope Andy feels better x

[@Tigerlilly9779]

: : my kiddos meltdowns can be like that. You are right as a parent it is incredibly hard to watch your child go through that and also keep both of you safe! : :

[@dan5721]

Tough day, sounds like everything just added up. Glad to hear things were resolved, hopefully he is ok tomorrow. I’m always absolutely exhausted after a meltdown and can sleep for hours and tend to be drained the following day, might be worth letting school know incase he is a bit off. Awesome parents once again, Anna is an incredible mum, Andy is so fortunate to have you both.

[@adventurestudios3357]

You need something to monitor whats on his screen so you know whats he doign but he doesnt know if you watching

[@markeloise1076]

Hope his meltdown wasn’t too extreme and I hope everyone is ok 👍

[@danielonn2002]

Apple is a FUBAR company anyways. Androud and PCs are much better.

[@jordangraybill1374]

Daniel ok??

[@lindabarry8501]

Wow I think u r both amazing how u both support each other ..what loving parents and Andy an d girls r a credit 2 ye ..much luv guys 😀💟

[@TheDelange1]

Of course you guys don't want to film him when he's upset, i hope he's feeling better now x

[@erissablackthorn9444]

I rarely have meltdowns but i think i had one last year with my friend Lisa when i went to visit her and she lives a little far from me. She has worked with kids with all types of disabilities, she does or did do overnight stays at a respite place. Its just her place was a bit different to last time i saw it, a bit messy and i couldnt get to spare bedroom properly. The battery was low on her smoke alarm so that was beeping every minute. Im always a little anxious being away from home for even a few hours and its worse when things dont go to plan.

[@erissablackthorn9444]

I also feel a little bad because i am in my twenties and it was akin to having a 2 year old tantrum. I just had all these emotions bombarding me and i had to just let it out.

[@wallacetf]

ive recently had a similarly shaped beard. it wasnt a good shout. i would reccomend a trimm - although obviously do what you want. also: its a pain in the a** to get rid of a beard like that. my opinion is get rid of the beard and look dapper. i love you guys and think you are doing such a great job in everything you do within the autistic realm. i have a lot of evperience with these issues. dont listen to me about anyything (but have a shave). It feels so good.

[@kevinchapmanvlog]

There's no danger of me shaving at any point. I haven't shaved for over 10 years...

[@thebestwillow]

One of my long running friends asked what to do if I have a meltdown. This is what I told her. Stay close enough that we can see and hear each other, but no closer. Don't try to touch me. Avoid talking to me where possible. If there's something you think I might want or need, like a jumper or a glass of water or something to eat, then get it, and put it down near me, where I can get it if I want to, without having to go past anyone. Especially avoid asking me too many questions, because my brain is already far too full. Other than that, it's just a case of stay with me and wait for me to calm down and/or start talking to you. Everyone is different, but maybe there's something you can take from this to make managing Andy's meltdowns easier for him and you.

[@Kazzzy03]

hope everyone is fine now and you find out what was wrong to prevent it from happening again

[@lynndrury1]

You two are the best parents .

[@josephreed2728]

So supportive you are as A family it’s amazing to see and supportive Well done Kev and Anna

[@sghost6652]

Sounds like you guys dealt with the situation at hand brilliantly. In the past i know what it feels like to just want to get out and escape when things are too much. Hope your all ok now x

[@itsjustholly2993]

You guys are such good parents❤️ Kevin dealing with the situation as best he could as well as still being strict and not giving him what he wants just because of the meltdown, it will teach Andy not to act spoilt and have you under his thumb as he will know meltdowns won't teach him that he can get what he wants. Aswell as Anna coming in from a long day at uni to switching straight to mum mode and helping Andy calm down ☺️so proud of you guys, you are doing great and I'm sure andys going to grow up into such an amazing guy 💕

[@stuartanderson9891]

👍 thumbs up

[@whyamihere384]

Glad to see that you are respecting Andys privacy and not including footage of what has obviously been a difficult day for him. Hope tomorrow is a better day for all

[@craigmason]

Oh no sorry to hear about young Andy having a meltdown hope he is ok as an autistic person myself I know what a meltdown is like it's not a nice experience to have one send him a big hug from me

[@GrannyGooseOnYouTube]

Ya'll just blow my mind, you are so wonderful with Andy.... and SO insightful as to your different "roles" as parents and how Andy works best with you when those roles are carefully adhered to. I don't know if I've ever seen a stepfather with such love, devotion, and determination as you, Kevin. Andy is such a dear soul... we all love him, and the rest of the family too. Thank you for sharing your life with us, with all its ups and downs.

[@HannahhhhJohnston]

Respect you both so much. Anna really is a calming force! Hope Andy is feeling better.

[@jeroendevries1429]

Kind of weird me saying this, but it looks like you're having the family of the sixties, this requires some explaining which I will. Dad does the disciplinairy things and miss the mother does the hugging part. Anyway, I feel for you Kevin. Handling these kind of unexpected situations is never easy, you did do the best you could. In hindsight there are always questions for parents like what could I have done better? The only answer to that is nothing. And that is because you never can predict how you'd react in advance to the new situation. Eventually you can say glad that this all is over, and that everything went back to normal again. Good job. Give Andy a big hug, and Anna is officially being named the Hero Of the Day. Cheers! 😉

[@Fox01294]

Or maybe a chrome book?

[@helenjames6982]

You're a great family

[@roycropper698]

+The Chapman Family Does Andy have a fear of death? Maybe his anxiety kicked in and he believed he was going to die? Maybe it could be linked with the death of his Nan (Anna’s mum) and believed the same would happen to him and he wouldn’t see his mum and dad again. Maybe him being hit on the bus could’ve brought back memories of when he was previously attacked on the bus. Therefore, like you said the “laptop incident” was the final straw that broke the camels back. The saddest thing about being a parent with an autistic child is they can never tell you how they are feeling and why he had his meltdown. Really hope Andy has recovered now and settled down. Kevin, you done extremely well and hardly any of us could do the same thing, you should be proud of yourself. Hope Dave is ok as well.

[@imaginaryenemy2565]

Wouldn't say he has a fear of death he doesn't quite understand death yet his anxiety seems more rooted in fear of the unfamiliar when he's somewhere he's never been before or his routine gets disrupted

[@soccerdavid77]

Thoughts to all of you. Prayers that all will be well with Andy and you all. Also, make sure to give Dave a treat or 2!

[@judiglover1020]

i you u video

[@jennmcarthur1471]

I understand the whole part with the hugs and squeezing to hard. I work with a child that requires that durring a meltdown and i am hefty person and i am always afraid to hurt him but after sometime i found that it really does work and you just need to do it. I have dealt with the meltdowns a lot..it takes a a strong minded person to deal with a meltdown. And at time times 45 mins into them i need to take a min to myself and step back and figure out how else to go about it. Keep up the great work :)