RTAA & Source - The Snail Assassin

[@littleandstupidgirl]

"Keep your friends close, and you snail enemies closer." -Matt Hollum

[@jeffgordonfan2462]

Best line ever

[@King-ze2kt]

littleandstupidgirl he said it as I read this

[@thebeavpercabethftw9604]

That sounds like something Sarge would say.

[@ribbonroach5023]

I cant believe tiktok is freaking out about this conversation without knowing where it came from

[@Nopenotatall]

For real they think it’s from reddit

[@Stubbaroni]

@@Nopenotatall I think reddit thinks its from reddit

[@Nopenotatall]

@@Stubbaroni they probably do. A lot of people on TikTok say it’s from reddit as well. Makes me feel old remembering this from rt podcast in its glory days

[@lastEvergreen]

Remember when It Follows stole the idea too.

[@duzk7588]

Who the hell cares

[@Enthralpy]

Gus: This is the dumbest hypothetical question ever Also Gus: Okay but what if the snail snuck onto the ship and was heading to you right now and you wouldn't even know--

[@hallowjupiter6305]

Holy shit coming back to this now, I didn't realize that even the memes spawned from the question came from this! The spaceship meme that brought me here, already done by them! Man I wish Gavin would get credit for it

[@typacsk]

"Do not speak to me of the Deep Magic -- I was there when it was written!"

[@ranjibir3806]

Why would Gavin get credit for it? This question has existed for a long time. Way before RT even existed

[@sinnyboy3950]

​@@ranjibir3806 Where did it originate then? They literally all just made this up on the spot

[@ranjibir3806]

@@sinnyboy3950 who knows where it originated from but the snail question has been a thing way before Gavin ever brought it up considering I've heard about it since I was in primary school. Well before this episode ever aired

[@lainsechoes]

@@ranjibir3806no it hasn’t 😂. stop lying and using the same copy/paste reply

[@CoolAsFreya]

First unofficial million dollars but...

[@ryzacobalion3622]

+CoolAsFinnBro very true

[@ryanr4156]

CoolAsFreya was 10 million dollars tho

[@semi_friendly5086]

All these memes don’t know this is the origin. I was there at the beginning. When I heard people talking about the meme I was like “I remember gavin asking this!” Crap I feel old

[@DaekoTan]

"Do not cite the deep magic to me, witch. I was there when it was written."

[@ranjibir3806]

This is not the origin. The question has existed for a long time now. I remember hearing it at school before RT even existed

[@lainsechoes]

@@ranjibir3806 no it hasn’t.

[@jermonster4718]

Just put the snail in a sealed Tupperware bin

[@vista7311]

yangxiaolong47 Decoys

[@King-ze2kt]

yangxiaolong47 over the years it gets smarter it will find a way out

[@thevoidlord1796]

How did you put it in the box.

[@Shinigami-ve1mf]

someone else can put it in for you

[@mrastleysghost]

put it in a screw-top jar and torque the fuck outta the lid. No way a snail can open a lid, i don't care how smart it is.

[@corton1357]

And 7 years later an app that has yet to exist would put Christmas music over this idea

[@jare3459]

1.hire a guy capture snail 2.keep snail 3.live my immortal life 4.wait till be immortal become a pain 5.toch snail easy as that

[@inoskyee]

toch snail

[@austinlauver0197]

Fucking exactly

[@that_one_guy_run3151]

That’s what I thought

[@JackJQC]

Wait till be immortal become pain. toch snail I thought I couldn’t spell

[@Alexander-vm2ox]

To make it work If anyone touches the snail they die

[@cherrychocolate1434]

The snail at the end was from Adventure Time.

[@joshybratwurst1398]

Cherry Chocolate I figured

[@A-man1998]

In a way, I guess that would make sense.

[@NeyahDaCommie]

Yeahh

[@charleskeshi978]

I know.

[@ryanellis4818]

"Well yeah, sure, he's the original."

[@Wizzkidwas]

Trap the snail They never said anything about that

[@bootwiththeloot4348]

Trap it in salt. Done.

[@bootwiththeloot4348]

+Valon Fine. Put a cup on it.

[@crazyinsane500]

Nature finds a way.

[@TorrentialStardust]

crazyinsane500 nature, uh.. uh... finds a wayyy.

[@SubtleHawk]

But what if the snail you trapped is a decoy snail and then the real one gets ya

[@BenjaminSteber]

"This is the dumbest hypothetical question ever!" A decade later it's the biggest meme in RT history.

[@thomaswillard6267]

The origin of "Million Dollars but..."

[@ryzacobalion3622]

+Thomas Willard IT'S THE PREQUEL EPISODE

[@goatrambo]

It would take the average snail (moving at 0.029 mph) 10.5 years to cross the continental United States (2680 miles across). So you really just wouldn't have to worry about it. I'd take it for sure.

[@funkyano]

Yeah, but what if he got on a bus?

[@TheTransFlag]

@@funkyano or a plane

[@elsuperfish]

You're immortal, remember you have to keep this up for all eternity.

[@TheMasterUnity]

The snail will eventually learn to use transport

[@eurithmicsrocks]

The fact that this took 7 years to blow up

[@elitemaxtheman2217]

And then that all became a game mode called Death Snail

[@nuqqets9570]

I love that there's now a Gmod game mode for this scenario

[@jayfeather7764]

What gamemode?

[@nuqqets9570]

@@jayfeather7764 Look up GMod Death Snail for the AH vid

[@XxTheJimsterxX]

""When you come back to work.....be careful!" @ 0:51 Gets me EVERY fucking time xD

[@minecr4ft1z]

every hypothetical takes the cake w/ Gus.

[@MrAntho191]

I love that this is now a thing and no one knows where it’s from😭 Thank you RT❤️

[@rogerrobles6121]

I like how they had an easter egg for the snail in lazer team 2

[@bplatinumpaladin]

This needs to be an IOS game. You play as the snail.

[@King-ze2kt]

PandaBrady I want that game

[@lanarobles9379]

You should do it

[@A-man1998]

Do it!

[@midnightfandoms8960]

Eliza Ripper thank you for sharing that knowledge

[@utachan9318]

love how this has come back on tiktok en

[@Jankowskimanno]

Frr

[@otaku750]

The boys on Trash Taste had this same question come up and I had to come back and revisit the source xD

[@dankester5607]

They made a movie about this... it's called It Follows

[@VzDARKzV]

+Dan Kester Yeah, I was just thinking that...that movie sucked by the way. The online reviews lied to me.

[@makaveli9789]

I saw the movie, it was one of the shittiest movies I have ever seen

[@franzsanders9573]

Yeah, I saw that movie...and it was actually really good!

[@lowfive7983]

@@franzsanders9573 It was very good, above users have poor taste.

[@Felivii]

I never imagined it'd be that big. Good movie

[@lainsechoes]

THE ORIGIN OF THE INFAMOUS MEME

[@ThatLadinPlaid]

What if...hear me out...if they put a cup over it?

[@GothicSoldier9000]

+SqueedilyPlays What, like Godzilla? It'd still be moving around, leaving wet spots everywhere. "That damn snail..."

[@jackj3596]

I think this is where the idea for "It Follows" came from.

[@SharkyGTX]

Love how this has become a meme now

[@meredith989]

Such a great idea to do this! haven't stopped watching this all morning!!

[@BlackShadowUchiha]

It is 2023 and this has been posted everywhere so now my coworkers are debating the snail and what counts as a touch, and all those things

[@samip7234]

i wonder if gavin knows what has become of his theory

[@_DuxNet]

WTF? This is pretty much the premise for the film It Follows!!

[@peterstangl8295]

The Snail Follows

[@peterstangl8295]

coming to a theater near you

[@nukenarwhal7244]

GiRTheDuck this was before it follows

[@_DuxNet]

Nuke Narwhal Yea I know which makes it even more funny. The studio owes him some cash I think.

[@sevirkenevans]

Like 10 million dollars?

[@tayoh4026]

This is a huge trend now on tik tok…..

[@TheSeaofScience]

Just negotiate with the snail. “Listen, let me live 100 years and you can kill me. Just give me that and I’m yours”

[@harelchen]

You are really fast! I figured it would take you a while to upload this but damn you work fast! Props Hembo good job.

[@malia5089]

The way this is coming back again

[@T5ComixCartoonz]

This is more or less the premise behind "It Follows".

[@domeniklosacano7524]

From what I’ve researched a snail can only move a meter an hour 😂 I think you’d be relatively safe for ever LOL

[@lainsechoes]

yeah they REALLY overestimated the movement of a snail 😂

[@Johnnyarvin]

This came right back round

[@altec003]

This should definitely be their next show.

[@BublySofaPotato]

*Google gets bombarded by snail questions*

[@stageman3777]

"cant sleep, snail will get me" ~ RTPC + The Simpsons

[@murscience]

This is great now that they made this in gmod

[@leviticus_internet]

So until now 7 years later, the snail assassin turns into a popular thing on tiktok?

[@jellydonut0]

This is my new favorite rtaa I can't stop hitting replay

[@Hidden-Kard]

this is the first million dollars but

[@ryanr4156]

Mark Mahony this was 10 million dollars tho

[@LeonGun8]

Same concept however.

[@ororion212]

There should be a full open world game based on this

[@johnhostetler2167]

Fun fact snail's speed is only about 1 meter per hour so even if you're in the same room as them you still probably have a couple hours before you have to move a few feet

[@gokuworldsbestdad7150]

The Asnailsin!

[@comeatmebro7654]

Get someone to put it in a cage. Badda bing, badda boom, it’s trapped.

[@seawarshark6674]

They don't know that they created the universal meme

[@teemvagabond2303]

Solution to the snail problem put a cup over it

[@XSanctusMalumX]

Go to France.

[@duelgundam]

I live in Singapore, soooooo -accept deal in America. -wait for snail to get close -go back to Singapore -invest money -profit!(?)

[@jamescontado9675]

POV: You came here because of tiktok

[@tayIon]

POV, you dont know what POV means

[@EclipsedEquinox]

I loved Lazer Team 2, the snail was in it.

[@fallenwallgaming3932]

I just realized they referenced this in Lazer Team 2

[@Blizzic]

They could just trap the snail

[@jonweik4091]

Blizzic cant part of the deal

[@nfadaloo]

But what if the snail gets out?

[@King-ze2kt]

Blizzic it gets smarter you can't trap it forever

[@arvianworkshop7118]

the begining of "million dollar but.."

[@Bat-Addicted-Loony]

They made a movie about this, it's called It Follows and it's actually really good

[@joshybratwurst1398]

Gavin: Would you take 10 million dollars... Burnie: No. Yes. Sure.

[@leona.4220]

The start of greatness.

[@WillyTung]

Assuming the slowest speed of a snail (0.0028m/s) and half the diameter of the planet (6,371km), it would take the snail 72 years to reach you. Solid plan!

[@slyngn7847]

+Willy Tsung Is that when the snail goes perfectly straight? Because let me be hypothetical here. What if it needs to go up a mountain or over the ocean? Like, what if it decides to hitch a ride on a vehicle LOL

[@robynhood3983]

+Willy Tsung Also you would want to use the half of the Circumference of the planet as the snail would go around and not through the planet. also 1/2 of diameter is radius

[@MunchkinMexican]

smh tiktok people not knowing this is where snail tok is from

[@DukeTheRebel]

The original origin of A Million Dollars But

[@Belushibrotherfan64]

How this just now getting traction on Tik Tok lol

[@JoeyDaPal]

I feel like it wouldn't kill the guy watching, since it's you who dies when touched by the snail.

[@kingofbunga]

Lazer team 2!

[@isaiahweber5036]

kingofbunga yeah

[@demien2341]

to people saying "put a cup on it", yes you are somewhat right. Here's, another thing to think of. What about taking said cup, and putting it in a bowl filled with salt. The snail is immortal, but it's still a snail

[@GhostedArmy]

Lazer Team 2, anyone?

[@tevphoenix252]

The snail is back...

[@TJSpider8]

Love what you do

[@robertrealrosso237]

I just did the math. The snail could only travel 45 miles a year... this is worth taking the money

[@DarknessXER]

The Snail Assassin, pretty much it follows but with an instant death touch buff

[@SprintToggle]

Keep your friends close but your snenemies closer.

[@stephanie9406]

I like that they did the snail from adventure time

[@rjstanley89]

Gavins Laugh > Nail down a chalkboard

[@uncrownedoak7777]

rjstanley89 I agree, it is greater than nails on a chalkboard.

[@ghostney]

if you traveled around half the world, it would take the snail at least 47 years to reach you

[@walrusrider7138]

Unless it managed to get on a plane

[@forgettableguy4142]

I bright this up to my friends at school and know they think I spend my time making up dumb snail theory like this all the time

[@rydertheashen1722]

Y'all remember when Rooster Teeth predicted the plot basis of the horror movie "It Follows"?

[@naruto17mirai]

Nice one Hembohero

[@cameronanderson9242]

And here in 2021 its now the biggest meme of october

[@arthasmenethil9957]

This is my favorite Million Dollars But...

[@cameron1008]

Basically the plot of "it follows"

[@JackDManheim]

chill gus, that's a great hypothetical. They made a movie about it several years later, except the snail is a sex monster.

[@teknoguy1212]

Great podcast

[@ApexGale]

Put the snail under a cup, Put a cup over THAT cup, then put a book on it.

[@BrianSpurrier]

Before you go to sleep, surround your bed in salt. It won't kill the snail, but it will slow it down

[@timthatshim8037]

This would make the best movie ever!

[@patwick7351]

My plan is to lock the snail in a safe and then live out my immortal life

[@wayneigoe6722]

The easiest way to solve this problem is to wear my latest idea: SALT SHOES! They spray a small puff of salt out of tiny nozzles in the soles with every step. (I originally came up with them to make winter easier, but it would oddly work in this situation too) Sure, it wouldn't kill the snail, but every time it got nearby, the snail would be moving over a line of salt... Escargot? More like Escar-NO...

[@colemanholt2434]

Okay, snails move pretty darn slow, but here's my solution. Put the snail in a jar without touching it. And then seal the lid onto the jar with flex seal so it can't be opened again. The extra step then is to bury the jar or launch it into space.

[@gurrennap]

that's the adventure time snail

[@moonriseoversunset9611]

You could put the snail in a jar and never have to worry about it. But if you forget you can put snail jar all over the jar so you'll remember not to open it.

[@allyaw4798]

That snail on screen was from adventure time

[@oivi3iv635]

So this is where the plot of it follows came from

[@MJinPitt]

Who’s here because of 🚦

[@alfreddrevis7364]

It's the snail from Adventure Time!!!

[@LesterCrestLS]

Reminds me on that movie. It follows.

[@RumblesLikeDumblebee]

I think this is just a reminder of why humans are terrifying. We are persistence predators. We used to hunt by just tracking and following animals until they gave up or we got the jump on them.