12 Reverse Culture Shocks as an American (After 4 years in Europe)

What reverse culture shocks might you experience returning to the US after living abroad?
After 4 years in the Netherlands (Europe), I'd like to share the culture shocks I experience whenever I return to California (USA).
Cheers 🇺🇸
David
⏰ CHAPTERS:
00:00 Intro
00:29 Homelessness
01:56 American friendliness
03:06 Better Customer Service (At Times Too Much)
04:28 Tipping
04:55 Free Stuff
05:31 Obesity & Healthcare
07:06 Big Supermarkets
08:19 Big Driving Distances
08:58 Poor Public Transportation
09:52 Capitalism
10:18 Standing Out
11:36 Live to Work
12:36 Conclusion
📽 OTHER VIDEOS:
🏠 Living in a Dutch Canal House - • Apartment Tour: 400-ye...
🇺🇸 USA vs. Europe - • USA vs. Europe: Live t...
💶 Cost of Living (Amsterdam) - • How much does it cost ...
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😁 WHO AM I?
I'm David, a Californian living in Amsterdam. I grew up in San Francisco, studied and worked in LA, took a sabbatical around the world, and then packed my bags for Europe. I make videos about lifestyle design, hiking, and living/working/studying in Europe.

[@hidavidwen]

What's the biggest (reverse) culture shock you've experienced visiting the US?

[@helgaioannidis9365]

My father visited the US 15 years ago and got problems with his skin, because of the amount of chlorine that's used to make tap water "safe". He was also shocked about how dangerous the cities are.

[@hidavidwen]

@@helgaioannidis9365 Thanks for sharing. That's really unfortunate. Yeah there's a lot more crime in US cities than European cities.

[@jsb7975]

Heel interessant !! Fact is though that paying for use of a toilet in bars, cafés, restorants or any horeca I never encounter in The Netherlands. (it's a rare thing at least) Every bigger city has at least one or two additional supermarket XL where you have for each item at least 20 opportunities of choice.

[@leonkennedy2909]

Elliot Rodger here... those brutes ....

[@barelybear5489]

@@jsb7975 Sligro , Makro

[@kenavr]

You are clearly an American ;) I don't thnk a lot of Europeans would agree with "US customer service is clearly better" or that neither "Work to live" nor "Live to work" is better. You say customer service is taught, if you are in a "better" restaurant in Europe it is very likely the staff went through years of training and certification. They are not acting differently because they are worse, don't have to beg for tips or not taught better, but because that's what the European customer expects them to do. If I am out for a 3-5 hour dinner with some friends to catch up and have to interact with the staff during a conversation or more than 3-5 to five times (meal order, another drink, drink, dessert/coffee) I am annoyed. I am not there for the staff or likely the food, I am there to have a good time with the people I am with.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your perspective! Yeah someone else pointed out these are cultural differences and what you expect from your country…you should not immediately expect from another

[@viquiben4919]

I totally agree with you. Going out to dinner is another concept in Europe.

[@PurpleHumbug]

Absolutely, totally agree. I do think being bothered by the waiter every 5 mins asking ‘are things ok’ is better customer service. Or being hounded as soon as i walk into a shop to just browse. Leave me the ‘f’ alone.

[@nillyk5671]

Not quite, European customer service can really suck in Europe. Some are extremely rude especially in France.

[@jimloontiens9275]

@@nillyk5671 so can be the customer ( i was a waiter for many years)

[@Dutch1961]

There is a right and a wrong answer. Working too much hours is one of the root causes of lower life expectancy in the USA. You need to limit your working hours to be able to cook a normal meal instead of having tor resort to fast food because you don't have time to cook. You need enough days off from work to recuperate from a busy period. You need a decent social system so people that are ill can take sick leave without losing their pay or even their jobs. You need affordable healthcare so people can see a doctor without going bankrupt or visit a doctor too late and end up terminally ill.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Paul for sharing your perspective. You're right in that there are so many factors leading to lower life expectancy. And the long hours thing...there's a difference between working long hours because (1) you choose to VS. (2) working long hours because you feel like you have to. I don't advocate for (2) at all. I hear some companies are enforcing "force time off" in the US which I think is a good thing. I know quite a few people (1) who CHOOSE to work longer hours because they're incredibly passionate about what they do for a living-people building businesses or working to build the next Google. Or they have to because of life circumstances (eg. supporting a family or multiple families)

[@Wolfe1966]

Work smart, not hard. Working long hours isn't very efficient. Studies show that the productivity of the workforce in the Netherlands is higher then that of the US.

[@DavidJohnson-dp4vv]

Interestingly enough Japan, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Macau and Singapore all have high working hours along with longer life expectancies.

[@Dutch1961]

@@DavidJohnson-dp4vv and higher suicide numbers.

[@pritapp788]

@@DavidJohnson-dp4vv Genetics mate...

[@wora1111]

Customer Service: As a German good customer Service at a Restaurant is like this: If I raise my head to look for the waiter I will see him or her walking towards me. The rest of the time I do not even notice them because they stay out of sight.

[@hidavidwen]

I wish it was like that everywhere...just raising your head and the waiter comes!

[@esoekidjo]

@@hidavidwen same in the Netherlands. Service will ask if everything is ok when they just served the food and after taking empty plates. They stay mostly away from customers but will be looking the around the diner. So when you just raise your head and make eye contact they will come to you. If you don’t want them to come just avoid eye contact with staff.

[@okaldhol]

Totally agree. So much better than some annoying waiter trying to rush your meal and push you out!

[@craigm.5674]

That is one reason I love living in Germany….people give you space and quietness…. Kills me when I go to usa and they drop a check or bill while I am still eating

[@jo_asiago8539]

My Canadian friend living in Europe also makes comments about the customer service (not being friendly enough). It is always quite interesting to me - I find the levels of service in Europe sufficient. And every time the service personnel is overly engaged (and too friendly) - I get uneasy ;) ;)

[@Hodoss]

European customer service isn’t inferior, it’s adapted to a different culture. Traditionally, Europeans expect seriousness and discretion, not friendliness and competing for your attention. It’s not as strict anymore, but switching to mandatory friendliness is the other extreme. There are American introverts who love their trips to Europe precisely because this culture of calm and discretion is a breath of fresh air for them, and they don’t have to force themselves so much.

[@hidavidwen]

Me me me. American introvert here. I love the calmness but then some times…it is too calm and it takes forever to get serviced here. That’s when it’s frustrating.

[@Hodoss]

@@hidavidwen Lol yeah, in many places they consider it rude to go too fast, it’s seen as not letting the customers enjoy their stay and pushing them out. You have to specify you’re very hungry or in a hurry beforehand, see if they can speed things up.

[@darkiee69]

@@hidavidwen make eye contact with the staff and they'll be right over. If you're just sitting there they'll assume that you're exploring your options.

[@alvinmercado6305]

Nah it’s inferior Lol

[@FrancoUnAmericano]

@@alvinmercado6305 No, it's clingy and intrusive.

[@daveaglasgow]

Being from Scotland I definitely prefer the customer service in a restaurant here than in north America. Friendly when you walk in, give you time to browse the menu and they don't keep bothering you, or have an over friendly attitude which is clearly only done to get tips. I am not their friend, I didn't go there to make friends with the staff, but enjoy a meal with the person/people I am there with.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Yeah I personally prefer a more low key customer service myself...as long as they are attentive when you need them.

[@thevagabondonwheels4918]

I have dined out many times in Scotland and have zero complaints.

[@matthawksworth]

Exactly. The most polite thing to do is to serve while letting them fluently enjoy their time with their people, so your intrusion is minimal. But this would be considered rude in the US. It is true that TV rots the brain.

[@tahiti1]

I'm always shocked how people in the US are collectively in denial about the level of homelessness and poverty in the USA. It is far worse than many countries that I have lived in Latin America and Asia, that many US Americans condescendingly refer to as "developing" "poor" "third world" even though they have leapfrogged the USA in terms of many quality aspects of daily life - public infrastructure, universal healthcare and education, food quality, etc, etc. An Australian recently refered to the US as an "underdeveloped nation with a Gucci belt", an apt deacription sadly.

[@hidavidwen]

I think I truly noticed it when I left to live somewhere else and came back. Because you get used to it..the normalcy of it…and you don’t realize it until you see a different perspective

[@ceha9517]

Everything has to do with their ultra capitalism. Caring for others is socialism. Being overfriendly does not mean they like to help you more or actually help you more. It is overacting to not offend the customer. that he will come back to bring you more money. It is all about money. The opioid crisis? For money. Fat people? Sugar and cheap ingredients. And then the people get diabetes and insulin is so expensive. Why? Because the pharma industry can. Regulation is socialism. Universal healthcare is socialism. You struggle in life? It is your fault. If we would help? Socialism. Stupid. But it us like it is. The country is going down rapidly.

[@breft3416]

People are very aware of poverty but leadership is not able to deal with it.

[@ceha9517]

@@breft3416 aha. The society is not like "you are poor? That is your own fault"?

[@Tupelo927]

@@ceha9517 Bootstraps! Bootstraps have been the common refrain of politicians for most of my life-- nearly half a century. Sadly, many self-described Christians (including clergy) view poverty, homelessness, & drug addiction as moral failings. They dole out derision & condemnation, not compassion & help.

[@ecenbt]

About the grocery stores: i agree that average grocery store is much bigger than anywhere in Europe mostly, but i don't agree about having more variety/more choice. In the US all you have is artificial variety. When I lived in US the closest grocery store was in a commercial center and it was so big, and they had 30 different brands of cheese, but essentially every brand was selling the same 5-6 types of cheese. So there was no real variety, only many brands of the same mild cheddar or Colby jack or provolone cheese to choose from. Whereas in Europe in an average grocery store, you won't have as many brands but you'll have 10-20 different varieties of cheese as a given. The myth that the US has so much choice is not real (of course there can always be exceptions but this was the general mainstream grocery store)

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. "Artificial" variety. That's a new one for me.

[@k8niedzialek]

So true! In Poland for example we had 15-20 different apple varieties. When I moved to the US I was depressed with 3 choices I had

[@robertchmielecki2580]

My wife is currently visiting her sister in the US and also says there's no real bread there, even in large grocery stores, only the quasi-bread variety you can use for toasting at best. No wholegrain, no rye bread, no dark, heavy, moist, clay-like real bread with sunflower or pumpkin seeds. Just the same from a few producers: white quasi-bread that feels cottonwooly . Cheese suffers from similar fate there, apparently. We're from Poland btw.

[@breft3416]

Everything in the US stores is stocked by what sells the most, not on serving needs. If it doesn't sell you won't find it. It's pathetic.

[@jamesmorris3123]

The same cheese with a different brand name.

[@emiriebois2428]

Customer service in Europe is often about the quality of the product not about the superficial friendliness in order to get some tips !

[@hidavidwen]

True!

[@iamjustsaying4787]

@Emirie Bois it’s not friendliness for money it’s anticipating a customer’s needs and making sure they don’t have to chase down a drink or the check.

[@emiriebois2428]

@@iamjustsaying4787 Yes, specially when your salary is mainly based on tips

[@emiriebois2428]

@@koschmx Just a cultural gap, yes in Europe the client is guest not king ,and your money can not pay everything. By quality , I am talking about the ingredients used ,not if you are going to like it or not !

[@emiriebois2428]

@@koschmx American guests ? For many europeans they act as American Kings!

[@IntyMichael]

In many German restaurants (real ones, not fast food) you get free bread or another appetizer. And the customer service in the US felt to me always as getting me out as fast as possible to place another customer in my seat.

[@hidavidwen]

Never had free bread or appetizers in the Netherlands…and yes, you’re right. Waiters want more business in the US. Thanks for sharing!

[@monachopis6500]

@@hidavidwen I have seen a lot of "Americans react to....." lately. But the European countries are invidually and culturally different in many ways. And when these "Americans react" they say: "in Europe bla, bla, bla...." In the comments some 1000 people react as that is not the case where they live in Europe. We are many different countries and "variety is the spice of life".

[@inelouw]

@@hidavidwen Maybe it depends on the restaurant! Something like a pizza place, "eetcafe", or mom-and-pop Chinese restaurant might not serve free bread or appetisers, but upscale restaurants certainly do, even in the Netherlands! If the staff serve me what seems to be free bread and later I see it itemised on the receipt, that's actually a reason for me to lodge a complaint or not go back there. I expect a restaurant to offer something to nibble on while I wait for the first course to arrive, and not charge me for it.

[@christineperez7562]

@@inelouw Very entitled is what I call it.

[@osazuwaogbeide1540]

I agree I always felt like once I finished I was expected to leave no staying or I be squatting

[@EvolverDX]

As a German I was shocked when I was the first time in the USA. It's true, supermarkets in the USA are bigger and a lot of variaties of the same products, but the quality of the products (or the incredients) are horrible in comparison. It's hard to find healthy food. And your point of beeing average in Europe is not completly true. In Europe you get raised with the mindset of beeing a good part of the society for a greater good (united we stand). It's about "get pushed, and help others to be pushed". Work/Life-Balance in Europe is about beeing productive in your 8h of work. That's the whole difference. Don't waste your time with unnecessary conversations or breaks.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your perspective as a German! Yeah being average is more the mindset in the Netherlands. And yeah +1 to being productive in 8h and getting out and enjoying your life after those 8h

[@tabletikmaminkin5229]

About supermarkets, I did not see in Netherland even such big as in Germany, becouse land is there precious

[@tahiti1]

Totally agree Thomas, I'm British and think the same as you. I used to work for big US companies in Italy, and despite working shorter hours my Italian colleagues were far more productive and creative than my US colleagues on average, who thought it was all about clocking hours rather than being as productive as possible during those hours. I love being able to live in so many coutries around the world and have learnt so much from all 5 continents (I keep postponing Antarctica though!) Currently in Argentina.

[@eleveneleven572]

I worked for an American company once. The hours were ridiculous but there was "presenteeism" and my American colleagues pace of work seemed to slow down to compensate for the longer hours, which seemed crazy to me. Don't they have homes to go to?

[@tahiti1]

@@koschmx there are also plenty of Americans working two or more jobs! They call them "side gigs". Italy and US have very different economic systems , both good and bad. I've had the fortune to work many years in both ,(and others). Walk down any luxury retail street or mall in the world and you will be surrounded by highly successful Italian retail brands, they are also masters of luxury design & engineering and high end crafts in many sectors. Mostly private owned businesses rather than listed (a trend now catching on in US) which allows a longer term view. That level of quality creativity is at the highest end of productivity.

[@andrewjohnson6716]

Thank you for speaking on this subject. I’ve been living in Belgium for six years and experience a similar “reverse culture shock” whenever I return to Canada. In addition to all the things that you mention, things of note are: in Europe I can travel across the country and back by train for less than I’d spend on lunch. In Canada the same trip would cost over $100. There is a classism to public transport. In Europe everyone takes public transport whereas in North America it’s seen as being for poor people. Social programs paid for by your own taxes are somehow seen as “hands-outs” that citizens should be grateful for rather than being the very purpose of taxes.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Andrew. Oh yeah what I love about Europe is the fact that all these countries are so reachable and the infrastructure is built for travel. And it’s affordable too.

[@edonveil9887]

The US has public transportation. It is airborne.

[@el7griego]

"In EU everybody takes public transport whereas in NA it's seen as being for poor people". Wow, I thought these kinds of rediculous prejudices were only typically American. They are Canadian too? What a deeply sad and anxious culture..

[@nabsnemri770]

Welcome to Belgium ;-) I recommend that you visit the Walloon Ardennes, such as Bouillon, Dinant, Durbuy, La Roche en Ardenne etc. Namur is a beautiful city on a human scale to visit. I also recommend Brabant Wallon which is the best place to live in Belgium, especially Waterloo, Rixensart, Lasne, La Hulpe, Chaumont Gistoux, Louvain la Neuve etc.. Enjoy 🙂

[@johnofdebar4071]

Yes, I always gain weight when in the US because: 1. Portions are (much) larger than in Europe 2. I move much less as I need to use a car to everywhere 3. Food is available everywhere 4. There's seems to be added sugar in every food item I buy in the US.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing John. I can also relate to your 3 points. I always gain weight when I return (well it’s also vacation for me now) but move way less

[@markburke8929]

Sugar is a real problem. It in in everything in the US, sauces, salad dressings, bread even cold cuts of meat.

[@stefaanvl8385]

The fourth point you raise is crucial. Even if there's food everywhere, one can eat only as much as one can digest. But if there's sugar in everything you eat and (especially) drink, then your body gets way more sugar than it needs. And when body gets too much sugar, what does it do ? It transmutes it into fat. The energy is stored in layers of fat.

[@narellejames6096]

@@koschmx sugar is also listed in those products in Australia. The difference may be the amount of sugar included

[@TheAmericanCatholic]

⁠@@stefaanvl8385 number 2 is bigger than you think because some physical activity is needed for maintaining weight loss and when you drive your not getting physical activity. But if you live in a area where you can walk or cycle you can get enough physical activity and it’s pretty engrained in the routine so there is no stopping exercise if you want to do errand you must walk or bike for convenience. People who live in more walkable neighborhoods where errands can be done by walking see drastically lower obesity and heart disease. I’m not saying that bad food is a major culprit but it is obsessed over way to much while the horrible lack of physical activity Americans get from driving is ignored. Driving no more makes you fatter unless you are driving manual cars without power steering.

[@FullMetalPier]

About friendliness, I think it's about WHERE you have lived in Europe, because every european nation or even region within a european state has it's own typical personality.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing-you're right-there are also individual differences too

[@FullMetalPier]

Si @@koschmx

[@dancingwoolf]

I’ve had these exact same thoughts coming back to the states after 5 years in Europe. I feel like I don’t fit here anymore, and am actually heading back to Europe because of that. The lack of social securities doesn’t sit right with me, it feels inhumane.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Vanessa for sharing. I get it...I get it. It's the biggest question I get asked, "When are you coming back?" I don't know...and I have a feeling it'd be a huge shock for me to actually permanently move back (vs. visiting). Where are you moving to in Europe and was it easy for you to move back?

[@thevagabondonwheels4918]

I think "inhumane" is the right word for it, and this is coming from an American who has never spent more than two weeks in Europe at a stretch.

[@cartesiuscartesius233]

Thanks for a great video. I'm from Europe (Sweden) and the homelessness thing has really hit me like a punch in the face when I've visited the US for developer conferences. I just can't understand it. If you wake up in the morning and feel happy about your day, you're immediately pulled down and saddened when you exit your hotel to walk to the conference venue. People lying on the street asking for money every 50 metres. People who are clearly hurting and like you mentioned, often times with mental health issues. From a strictly egoistic point of view, being able to feel happy and carefree makes it well worth paying taxes to make sure people are looked after, instead of facing Dantes inferno every time you exit your living quarters. I just don't get this about US society. Even if you feel "they should get off their butt and work" and all that kind of thing, isn't it worth (as a society) supporting your fellow humans, so that you yourself can feel happy and care free? I cannot feel happy about life after facing people in such distress when just walking along a street.

[@OprechtLetterlijkBizar]

Thanks for the vid. I’m curious when you say that in the US people live to work and in Europe they work to live, and you say that “there’s no right or wrong”… when you really think about it, you really think there’s no right or wrong? Maybe it’s because I’m European, but I really think that if you’re “living to work”, there’s something wrong on your outlook of life. Really not wanting to be judgmental here, but I really do believe that. We’re all human beings, and purely from a biological perspective a job is just something we need in order to live your life. But it’s secondary to living.

[@elcamino4799]

I agree with your opinion. Humans have to work to live. However, the conditions and intensity of labor differ depending on the country and the given social and cultural environment. I think it creates unequal working conditions and unsafe living conditions. What is clear is that if we belong to a society where humans live to work, that society must change.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Just replied to someone else with the same point...which is interesting because it shows the different cultural values! Well I know quite a few people who are working long hours to build a business, support their family, or build their dream. Their work gives them purpose. You're right though-certainly there's a BIG difference between working long hours in a toxic environment that doesn't align with your values vs. in a job that you love-I've done both. Finding the cure for cancer, building a better life for your family, becoming a world class athlete, changing the world...many of these endeavors require sacrifices. Anyways, every person has different values...so I think it's about figuring out what YOU value and aligning your values with whatever you're doing =)

[@agn855]

@@hidavidwen - well, the whole social fabric is different. While in the US it's all about the individual (who has to impress his neighborhood with even bigger cars/houses/amenities) the European style is about solidarity (ie not forcing waitresses to act as 'slave-a-likes' (something you interpret as "friendliness") to make ends meet). Guess what, entrepreneurs/self-employed people/athletes/... in Europe are working as hard as their American counterparts, but they won't have to risk their life bc not having proper healthcare, or if not preventable, being in-depth for the rest of their lives. So you have two jobs, no time to cook, wasting too much time buying low-quality products that are making you sick, while you can bearly afford proper healthcare. Quite obviously "the best country in the World". When pigs fly.

[@hootenanny6095]

The few rich in the US need the polulation to slave for their benefit. So if you are one of the 18 million rich in the US you would want this to be "right". The rest of the population might not agree as they have badder average living conditions than an average person in Europe. Work more hours for less wage. So if you are one of the 18 million......? If you are not: help the rest fighting for a better life. There is always an anti European way of living propaganda. Who do you think pump a lot of money into the system to keep status quo?

[@johnnyulster5637]

@@agn855 This is nothing but a collection of inaccurate negative stereotypes strung together to help you be rude, (and narcissistic if you are European). You seem to have no personal knowledge of what you are speaking of. So you appear to be simply an anti-American person based on flimsy anecdotes. This cheapens any actual commentary you may want to deliver. Have a Nice Day.

[@Lorenz1973]

When living in the USA as a European I was rather shocked by the low salaries of people working in hospitality (restaurants, hotels, etc.) and how poorly those really friendly/ helpful staff member were treated by some customers. Depending on what type of restaurant/ hotel, you need to adjust your expectations. You can’t expect 5 star everything if you pay for an inexpensive motel… Lots of customers expecting more than what they paid for… and some sadly mistreating the staff out of some strange dissatisfaction mixed with entitlement. I liked the friendliness/ helpfulness of staff in hospitality in the USA, but they are not treated well enough in return… or some people appear to rather mistreat them…. Even if sth goes wrong, people in the service sector usually try to fix it or find some solution… at least that is my experience in the US.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Andrea for sharing your perspective. Yeah I was (pleasantly) surprised that you can get by working in restaurants/hospitality in the Netherlands…I grew up with parents who worked in the service industry so I can relate. It’s not easy to be a service worker in the US for many jobs..

[@redraiders]

In general, America is a terrible place for lower salary workers. Those people would be better off in Europe. Those are the same people brainwashed to think America is the best no matter what when there is no way they will ever experience life outside of the US in their lifetime. America is best for higher end workers, with no accent, and preferably white.

[@Lorenz1973]

@@redraiders Wondering if it’s all about American optimism or exceptionalism - “I will it make it from my low paid job (dishwasher) to a millionaire” . Most Europeans don’t think that, taxing the rich and getting paid fairly in any job sounds like the better deal. Europeans are more pessimistic/ realistic. I love American optimism, infectious, but it’s also dangerous …

[@vikkipoitra749]

I find that Germans in public settings like restaurants and mass transit, are mindfully aware of others and speak quietly. Not so much in the US.

[@Hhutuber]

Most Americans in general speak quite loudly. But that's not intentional, but something they are used to. Not sure why, but if there is a group of Americans in a restaurant you will notice them and be able to follow their conversation from the other side of the room.

[@nate_j_d]

My partner and I (I'm Australian, she's Canadian) have moved to Australia (after 8yrs away for me) & her never having lived outside Canada before - she (and to a lesser extent, myself too) are going through that culture shock right now. We went via L.A. on our way back home & although Canada & USA have their similarities - we were shocked at the mass poverty (Vancouver is pretty bad too), but it really made me appreciate that European (even Australian to an extent) social values seem to be not to tread over your fellow man, just to get ahead in life/career. I love those things like healthcare, vacation & having a place to live are treated as a RIGHT, not a choice. Australia isn't perfect, for sure, but we no longer fret about living paycheque to paycheque (or getting sick - not being able to cover bills). I think it's pretty great that you're a global citizen David. I lived in the UK for a couple of years before moving to Canada & I always felt more of a connection between Europeans than my own. We're enjoying watching your videos & I think you have a natural gift for sharing your story. Cheers, Nate & Ash

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Nate & Ash! Well I hope you also experienced the nicer parts of the West Coast up to Vancouver (because it is beautiful)...but you're right, it's shocking to see the GAP. It's always been there...but I didn't really SEE IT until I left and came back. I feel connected to European culture but still very much feel a strong connection to the US. And I do struggle with being so far away from family and friends (my parents are getting older)...how did/do you deal with that? Cheers, David

[@nate_j_d]

​@@hidavidwen Thanks for the reply, David. We definitely did experience the nicer parts of West Coast living, yes. I guess it really just struck a chord with us, when you mentioned the whole homeless/inequality/mental health/lack of social housing aspect in your video. We really did love our experiences on the West Coast, but when you have a society that craps on its fellow man & you need 1+ million just to be able to afford a semi-dilapidated home, we just knew we probably wouldn't be living/moving back there anytime soon. Yes, it's hard to see your friends and family just getting on with their lives, without you being there (a sense of FOMO, for sure). At some point along the way, I just realized that I needed to go - that I needed to have other experiences, otherwise I'd live in a 'what if' moment for the rest of my life. If anything, living overseas has developed me to be so much more confident & willing to take calculated risks, knowing that life is too short not to at least try. As for the family aspect & watching them growing older by the month in front of you (via a skype session), it's just one of those crappier parts to living far so far away that you need to do the best in coping with. Maybe it makes us treasure those moments even more, when we get to see them in person, in a screwed-up way, it makes us love them more, if that makes sense? I hope you've found it easier to cope with that though, as the days & years have gone by? What you did in moving overseas though - just picking up your life & starting anew in a place, where you have no history though, is tough! When we've been watching your videos - those experiences you're sharing via this platform, really resonates with me, personally. Maybe you'll be able to look back on this moment & be proud of how far you've come & grown. Keep up the amazing work with the videos - will be sure to comment some more (get KZbin to send you some hard-earned Euros, ha)! If you ever find yourself in Australia, let us know. Cheers, Nathan

[@fddooley1]

When in Hawaii with my daughter, we are Australian and she was treating me for my 70th birthday. At dinner at an expensive restaurant the waiters were acting like trained monkeys in order to get a good tip. Australian hospitality workers are paid well. Whereas the American method requires wait staff often need 2 or more jobs to survive.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Fay. Hope you at least had a nice time in Hawaii for your 70th?

[@machtmann2881]

Thanks for the video, David! I just moved to Europe myself (although not Amsterdam. I ended up in Germany to take a great job. Cold choice as it is turning out haha). I haven't stayed long enough to experience culture shock if I were to go back now but it will slowly build up over time for sure. About obesity in America, something I have noticed is that due to all the car driving, it's much harder to get regular exercise in over in the States. Without going to the gym, I would never get the recommended daily amount of exercise and calorie burn just driving from place to place. But here, I do it just by going about my daily life such as being able to walk to a grocery store.

[@hidavidwen]

Hey Chris - welcome to Europe! Hope you’re enjoying Germany and this summer feels like a real summer (unlike last year in Europe). Haha would be interesting to hear your observations through the years. True, we drive everywhere in the US. I remember in LA…my local supermarket was literally 2 blocks away and I always took my car. Here, I cycle and walk everywhere.

[@Mr.Riffian]

In the Netherlands we have this saying: Nothing is free but the sun. Getting something without paying directly for it does not mean it was free. You paid for it one way or the other.

[@hidavidwen]

True! Nothing is truly free. Though many think so. Clever marketing tactic

[@BangkokZed]

I lived in NYC for over two decades, and I always feel that the customer service is rushed because waiters paid by tips so the most important thing is the guest turnover. In other places like getting passports, insurance, doctor's office going to DMV the customer service is mostly poor.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Oh yeah the DMV customer service…let’s not go there…

[@jonathantriplehorn2785]

Great video! I’ve seen a lot of similar videos lately (similar topic: US vs Netherlands) and yours is the first I’ve seen which brings up the point that the US values “standing out *above* the rest” where the Netherlands encourages being “average,” as you said. To me (having lived in Germany for a couple of years before), this mentality has less to do with “being average” than it does playing your individual, specific role withing a greater society. Europeans seem to have an easier time personally identifying with being a cog in a machine greater than themselves. I could be wrong, but to me this seems to be why Americans will often jump from one industry (job-wise) to another: following the money to serve themselves. Whereas it seems more common in Europe to stick to one career path: learn to do your job, then do it to the best of your ability. A lot to consider within this line of thinking… thanks for the video!

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Jonathan for your kind words and sharing your perspective. Yeah I think it also goes to how society is set up. There’s a lot more competition in the US education system. Where you go to school and where you work matter. So standing out helps you get ahead (and jobs). There’s less of a social safety net in the US too. Also watching Hollywood and media..we are influenced to be the next Steve Jobs. Which can be a great thing…motivates us to chase our dreams…but it can also be unhealthy if you are always chasing something (chasing the “shoulds”).

[@m2coy]

@@hidavidwen its also this same mindset (standing out and over competitiveness) which could be causing the homelessness. think about it. its like crabs trying to get out of a bucket and pushing the other crabs to the bottom. in europe (and asia) its mostly about working together so everybody gets out of the bucket. with exceptions of course.

[@madcyclist58]

I'm in a small town in the UK and I'm used to free public toilets, free ketchup and other sauces, and free tap water in pubs and restaurants.

[@spanishdncr71]

My reverse culture shock when I first went home to England for a visit after my first nine years of living in the states was how small everything is over there. The doorways are small the houses are small and the food portions in restaurants are small. Even the cars had gotten smaller. I was also shocked at how small the drinks were at restaurants and there aren’t any free refills. Now after going back almost yearly, since that first trip back home, I’m so used to it and I prefer that the food and drink portions are much smaller, because it means I don’t have to take food home with me and I also get to eat a pudding (dessert) when I’m at a restaurant. I never get to dessert in the US, because the entree is always far too huge!! I live on the East coast and in comparison I find customer service in England to be so much better than it is here and people are so much friendlier in the Northwest of England in comparison to the tri-state area. That’s not to say that there aren’t a lot of very nice friendly people here, because there definitely are, but in general I find customer service in England to be better and so much more polite. Also, most bottled drinks in England do not have sodium in them unlike here in the US where there’s often 25mg of sodium per serving and the taste is so noticeable and it only takes one drink to quench a thirst. Whereas, in the US no amount of drinks can quench a thirst unless it’s water.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your experience! Yeah I never really paid much attention about what’s in the food until recently (getting older) and the food contents seem to be a lot healthier in Europe. Oh yeah a full course meal in the US…well yeah I don’t think I can finish one with my shrunken stomach haha. And nice to hear you experienced great customer service back in England. Hm you’ve been away for a while…where do you call “home” now?

[@Brookspirit]

There weren't small, they were normal. Americas make things too big.

[@dougclendening5896]

I always tell people the same thing: houses, doorways, cars and streets are all smaller. They are "big enough". Food portions are the worst in the US. Along with the nonstop advertising, u healthy options and fast food everywhere. We tax our health via food for profits.

[@RealConstructor]

I agree that customer service is higher and more present in the US. And still I, as a European, feel uncomfortable with the pushy customer service in the US. It often doesn’t sound sincere and overdone. I wonder if it is polite in the US to ask a waiter/waitress not to disturb you at dinner/lunch and that you will wave his/her attention if you want something? It would make it less annoying and more pleasant for me. I acknowledge it would make it awkward for them. I don’t want them to get into trouble with their boss for slacking customer service.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for your response. Haha yeah that's an interesting question-I think you can. Many times, it's probably because they want to make sure you're doing fine...but they don't realize they may be annoying the hell out of you (I've worked in restaurants/retail before).

[@jessicaely2521]

I work in customer service. I work at a grocery store Publix is the name and we are forced to acknowledge people and ask if they need anything. For my store it's a way to protect our business. The ones who avoid talking to us, avoid eye contact, etc are the ones who are suspicious. If you weren't up to no good you would answer us and give us eye contact. I wonder if it's the same for the restaurant business.

[@johansilwouden3403]

@@hidavidwen As a Dutchman, I think that there is a difference between the customer service in big cities, like Amsterdam and smaller towns or rural areas. I live in a small, rural town of around 10,000 people, some 65 miles from Amsterdam. Here the waiters in restaurants ask regularly, at least every half an hour, whether we would like to have more drinks or need an extra portion of fries and vegetables. When I go to Amsterdam, I often find waiters indifferent, rude or stressed out! And the big cities, that is where the (American) tourists go to.

[@davidforman6191]

@@jessicaely2521 Europeans are typically more reserved and many find that approach confrontational. The soft sell approach works better in Europe than in your face customer service does.

[@jessicaely2521]

@@davidforman6191 I know this. I lived in Germany and Switzerland for 10 years. It's nothing new to me. My point is this is why US stores are "overfriendly."

[@natalieoyler-lusco9564]

As an American, I can’t stand being doted on in a restaurant. Every time I’ve been to Europe, I’ve been so happy with how much waitstaff have left me alone. It honestly feels like better customer service to me.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Natalie. I get it. Yeah it’s really annoying when they kept butting in.

[@thomashovgaard3134]

As a dane I absolutely hate when waiters keep bothering the table.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Thomas. I hate that too!!

[@andirodriguez8767]

Just discovered your videos and they’re SO helpful. I grew up in Mexico, been living in LA for 10 years now, and considering moving to NL for my (Dutch) boyfriend and your experience and mindset resonates SO MUCH with me. It’s a scary thing to move somewhere so different, so hearing all your observations is amazing. I really appreciate how objective you try to be while speaking of your personal opinion at the same time. Thank you for these videos! ❤

[@hidavidwen]

Aw thanks Andi, appreciate it. I also lived in LA for 10 years. So…when are you moving? :)

[@andirodriguez8767]

There’s no set date yet but I’m spending more time there before making a permanent move. Btw I saw in one of your videos that you live across the street from where I was this summer! Lol we’d be neighbors :p

[@savroi]

"Public transportation is not so great" is the biggest understatement I've heard in a long time.

[@hidavidwen]

Haha Roberto. Public transportation is terrible. Is that better? 😂

[@savroi]

@@hidavidwen 😄😂😂 I understand your positions as a USA born citizen. I can read between the lines. At any rate I love understatements, specially the glaring ones and particularly does said without sarcasm (which is the case). I was born in Argentina from Danish parents and I have lived and worked in a few countries including the USA. Over-politeness can be annoying specially when the one imparting it doesn't read the situation but really in the USA the latter has happened only a handful of times. When I was young I loved to drive now, twenty years into a life in Europe my car sleeps in the garage more often than not. Working in Richmond Virginia you had to have one or become a hermit. My cultural shock was how little the people knew about the rest of the World like: Ah, yes... Argentina, that's in Africa isn't it? or thinking about Europe in terms of a country rather than a continent. At any rate my stays there were pleasant, even in NYC. I don't agree with the American way but then again I don't have to. When I was offered to stay permanently I declined thankfully for I felt honoured, but I knew it wasn't my cup of tea.

[@robertboender5816]

As always a great video and well navigated not to upset anyone 😁 On the point to be average in The Nederlands..... don't think we don't thrive to be the best, we only try to not be in your face about it. And you can achieve more as a group then alone. About the other differences I think there's always work to be done to make things better for everyone.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Robert. Haha yeah I try to be objective as I can while giving my personal opinion. And it's always interesting to hear others' views. Yeah the Dutch are definitely not in your face as compared to Americans. And definitely agree with that mindset-there's always work to be done to make things better for everyone =)

[@dutchman7623]

Having good study results or be good in your profession, doesn't make you a better person in the Netherlands. You will receive respect from those around you, but that will stop when you start bragging about it. Social skills and teamwork are far more important. If you use your talents to improve the team effort, it's okay, but when it's for personal gain, it's rarely appreciated.

[@JustinCase99999]

About customer service: in France where I live we respect people who work. We don't regard waiters as our slaves (or check out cashiers, or taxi drivers). I think it's because of our history and social struggles in the past. So we expect and don't mind (most of the time) what Americans would call poor customer service but really isn't. Call the waiter if he doesn't come to your table and you need something. He'll expect you to. And he'll leave you alone the rest of the time. People go to cafés and restaurants to meet and have some time together (or alone), but not to be bothered every five minutes. Also the friendliness thing is good with friends, real friends, but a friendly stranger will definitely seem like a creep or a weirdo. Not to be confused with politeness though. Always say bonjour and merci and such. 😊

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Yeah definitely a lot of cultural differences. Something that works in one country may not in another.

[@JustinCase99999]

@@hidavidwen Absolutely. That's why this type of video is helpful for people planning a trip abroad.

[@lioneldemun6033]

The French are hypocondriacs. They are all fine and well until you- even inadvertently-push their buttons and then they erupt and show their true character and believe me it can be at times very ugly. From a Frenchman who has been living in France for more than 60 years !

[@mx2000]

Staff in Paris is often genuinely rude, even Parisians would agree.

[@JustinCase99999]

@@mx2000 Parisians know how to deal with staff in Paris. If you're not rude with waiters and such and say bonjour and don't treat them like you're entitled there should be no problem. As I tried to explain above, there's historical reasons why we don't treat staff like we're superior to them. I've seen tourists make that mistake and behave like they think they're owed some special treatment and are royalty or something. So some staff might make them understand that's not the case and how things work here, and appear rude to those tourists doing so, yes. And then those tourists go online typing away about rude staff in Paris. As I said, decades of going to Paris, never seen a rude waiter myself. Then again I don't behave like a d*ck. Also France has more tourists ever year than inhabitants, and is the most visited country in the world. So a tiny fraction of unhappy tourists will still be a lot of people, or behaving badly and causing more bad reactions from staff that are not used to being treated like sh*t, historically culturally, and socially.

[@StrawberryAppleCream]

When I visited the US(as a Dutchie) the biggest culture shock was how incredibly carcentric it is and how it is often impossible or very unpleasant to walk somewhere. I mean I knew the US was carcentric and I did enjoy seeing the huge cars (for Dutch standards) everywhere it was fun but I surely missed the walkability of European cities. Even if there was a foodpath often I would still feel like I was doing something wierd and cars are speeding right by you, very unpleasant.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. I remember when I lived in LA, my supermarket was two blocks away and I still drove. 😂

[@kunsthooligan_vegan]

Yes, seeing so so so many homeless people in SF or LA was shocking. I couldn’t live in the US because of this.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Ulf. Yea it can be a big shock for many. The suburbs and small towns are a lot better of course. But it is a shock

[@k8niedzialek]

You forgot about free water! That’s the biggest one for me! When I go back home to Europe, I’m always frustrated to pay for water in the restaurant. Sometimes I refuse to drink water altogether. All the points you made, I feel exactly the same way 😌 Also, Europe is complaining about not having enough babies being born, and yet, the playgrounds and streets are full of kids. When we’re back in San Diego, I pray everyday to meet at least one kid at the playground for my son to play with. And we live in a latino neighborhood, with statistically the most babies 😉

[@weird-guy]

it´s not about kids in the playground ,maybe playground are dangerpus in the usa idk, but is about percentage of population and in my country you dont pay for tap water.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Haha yes free water. Ugh I’m always irritated when I need to buy water and when I ask for tap water, I feel like it’s a sin and I get the “eye.” Though someone told me many restaurants in Europe make money from the drinks

[@tic-tacdrin-drinn1505]

American customers are ready to pay 25% (tax+tip) extra on their bill, but paying for water seems too much for them.

[@charlesunderwood6334]

Water is built into the costing model for restaurants. The assumption is that you will pay for wine etc and the pricing of the food is based on that. If you only have soft drinks, their pricing will be too low to be viable so they charge for water. I can't recall ever paying for still water in Europe unless I have specified bottles, but I always have wine or beer with a meal.

[@RaduRadonys]

There is no free water in the US. Actually there is no free water anywhere, unless you drink it from a river. The price of the water is simply included in the food price in the US, and that's it. But hey, you have the illusion of free stuff, and that's raising your hormones apparently.

[@tamielizabethallaway2413]

I don't think it's American "friendliness" that irritates us, it's the fact it's insincere. It's a lie of sorts. A script. A parting shot. It is intended to be seen as friendliness...and therein lies it's problem. Trying to APPEAR friendly, is not the same as BEING friendly. We don't need flattery or someone blowing smoke up our arses. We'd rather you say nothing at all if the alternative is a rehearsed mantra given to every customer. We like things straight forward, genuine, and from a real connection.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Tami for sharing. Well sounds like there are cultural differences at play. That's always key to understanding each other.

[@ellisrose8017]

Thank you. It annoys me. It's the same in Mexico, they have "adopted" this same "service". Living here as an European you cant sit anywhere calmly & enjoy your time.

[@tamielizabethallaway2413]

@@ellisrose8017 ugh! I can't stand people hovering over me. But then I've also seen many of these "differences in culture" videos, where it seems Americans go out to eat dinner, and literally, just go out, to EAT the dinner and home again an hour later! 😳 Like, what? I want at least an hour in McDonald's, let alone a proper restaurant. If I'm going out for dinner, I want to make an evening of it. If I just wanted to swallow food I'd stay at home, right? The whole point of going out should be to enjoy it, make eye contact, talk, laugh, relax, chat between courses, sip too much wine, and have a good chunk of hours away from the TV and gadgets, and sit with friends and family to connect. I've pictured eating-out in America, and between the waitress tapping her foot and looking at her watch, asking me for the tenth time "is everything ok?" or being handed the bill the second I put my fork down because they want the table back, I really don't think "have a nice day" 😁 is going to cut it for me! Aside from indigestion, acid reflux, hiccups from swallowing too fast, and whiplash from being seated and unseated in one swift move, I'd be about to explode with some good old fashioned British sarcasm! 😜 . "Have a good day??? I *WAS* until I came in here! Now you want a tip...? I'll give you a tip, in fact I'll give you a few: Stop hovering round your customers like a fart in an elevator, stop asking if the food's ok because I'd soon tell you if it wasn't, stop asking me if I need a refill or want to order anything else because I'm quite certain that I know how these things work and can order without being prompted...and for God's sake buy some more tables and chairs so we can sit for more than ten minutes without feeling rushed! How's that for some TIPS??? Now bugger off and have a good day yourself!!!" 😂🤣😅 . And that's just the polite version of what would be brewing up inside me! The X-rated version is a LOT more colourful, (

[@friscoeddie3223]

Been in Ecuador for the past 13 years. Made it back to SF in 2019. Your two main “I don’t miss this” was the homelessness and the obesity were also my two main disappointments in my two week vacation. I was shocked getting on the flight from Miami to SFO with the American passengers boarding. Crossing my fingers that they weren’t going to sit next to me. The passengers from Quito to Miami were all pretty much normal sized. The other shocker was the prices of restaurant food. $20 for the best burrito in SF and a juice drink. $20 for a Mexican pulled pork sandwich and a coke. I’m eating great lunches down here for $6. My fantasy of my past life in SF was severely crushed. Have no plans on returning anytime soon. BTW, Amsterdam is my favorite city in Europe. Always love bumping into Dutch people in my travels. Muy tranquilo.

[@hidavidwen]

Yeah SF has changed a lot. Still love it but it’s changed a lot. Living abroad broadens our perspectives of what we want and like (don’t like). Glad to hear you’re enjoying things where you are

[@seraphthegatekeeper]

San Francisco has been a dumpster fire since the 60s and not reflective of the rest of America at all. It's not even that reflective of the rest of California as far as I can tell.

[@Paltheus]

The moment a server takes my order and they are able to deliver it as requested I want to be left alone with my party and not doted upon. Privacy to enjoy the experience is key. The mark of a really good service personnel is the ability to follow their tables to know at what moment they are needed. In my opinion customer service is way better in Europe.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Paltheus! Sounds we all have different preferences

[@shiru6610]

Europeans (Germans in particular) are just less open than Americans.

[@denisdaly1708]

Agree

[@vikkipoitra749]

A conversation with extended family who live on the east coast, USA, I was surprised that other than knowing the name of their utility company, they were completely unaware of where their energy comes from - whether it was hydroelectric, gas turbines, wind power, etc. Here, in Germany, there is much greater awareness.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Vikki. You're right...to be honest, I know my utility company...but have no idea where the energy comes from =( Yeah I would bet it's not something most people are aware of (or care enough to be aware of) in the US...the education in Germany is also different

[@tahiti1]

And probably have no idea where their food really comes from either. Very sad. Also US obsession with AirCon really astounds me, when it is one of the major causes of global warming (20%)

[@weird-guy]

I´m from Portugal and my utility company shows where my energy comes from.

[@TheAmericanCatholic]

⁠@@tahiti1 to be fair our weather is tougher than yours and I don’t want to deal with hot summers without aircon I can’t stand heat I sweat in bed during the summer and that’s with aircon set at 72F or 21.5c. The 20% figure is for cooling AND heating. So far less than 20% for cooling alone. I’m not torturing myself for the environment.

[@tahiti1]

@@TheAmericanCatholic you seemed to have made an assumption about where I live!! I live in Guadalajara Mexico, and previously in Bangkok Thailand!

[@OprechtLetterlijkBizar]

One observation about the free refills in the US, at least when it comes down to sodas, I remember from when I lived in San Francisco for a year, the diluted ones that come from the machine indeed are free BUT they taste like chlorine…because they dilute the syrup with chlorinated tap water. So I always asked for a bottle (of coke) and those unfortunately do not come as free refills. About the service in Europe: in a normal restaurant you usually do not pay extra if you request mayo or ketchup, but you do pay for it at places like McDonald’s. And the service kinda is a hit or miss: sometimes it’s good other times it’s pretty bad (usually when they’re understaffed, particularly the case now due to COVID, as staff found other jobs and didn’t return). Personally for me it’s enough when they simply bring your food and when they notice you when you have a request or ask for the check. I actually find it a bit awkward when they constantly check up on you as if you’re the king or so. But I guess it’s just what you’re used to.

[@hidavidwen]

Haha yes the free refills can be hit or miss depending on where you go. I used to love free refills as a kid-now I just think they're such a bad idea from a health perspective. Yeah in regards to service...for me, it's a balance. I've had terrible service where I know they see/acknowledge ME yet they take their sweet time...and also annoying service where they keep coming to me every 10 minutes. But yeah simply noticing when you need something and being attentive-that's the art of customer service.

[@d34d10ck]

The funny thing about the free stuff is, that it's basically socialism, because we all know that nothing is actually for free. Let's hope nobody will find out about it or it will be the end of free stuff in the US.

[@Wolfe1966]

I wouldn't say costumer service in the US is better. It's a cultural difference. In the Netherlands most people would consider it pushy if a waiter keeps coming at your table. I would feel unwelcome if they give you your bill right away. If I need help I will ask for it. I can't stand it if someone is hovering over me the minute I enter a store or restaurant.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Roel. Yeah true cultural differences. I personally like a balance. Hate it when waiter keeps coming. Also hate it when waiter never comes to check in.

[@Wolfe1966]

@@hidavidwen well the reason why in the Netherlands and most European countries they don't bring you the check is that they want you to stay as long as you want, preferbly have some more drinks😉 The real profit for restaurants is in their bars.

[@d34d10ck]

"Better" is all relative. I'm an introvert and i always prefer people not talking to me. The best customer service for me is, when people leave me completely alone. I'll come up to you if i have a question and you better only give me the minimum information i asked from you. That's the best.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Patrick for sharing. I am also an introvert and hate when people keep interrupting (especially deep conversations).

[@jessicaely2521]

My culture shock was the stupidity of government personnel in Florida. I went to the DMV to pay for something to get my license plate back (it was a long time ago and I dont remember what it was). There was a really really really long line at the DMV and a person from the DMV asked you what you needed to do. I told the woman what I needed to do and the woman said "I needed to be at the registration office not driver's license office." I drove over there waited 3 hours to find out I was in the wrong place and I needed to call a phone number. I called the phone number and waited another hour before I got to a human. I found out I needed to go to the registration office. I went to the registration office and they said I needed to call the phone number. Once I lost my shit and said they said to come to you the office sent me to the DMV (I originally started here). I got to the place and there was another long line and the same woman asked me what I needed. She said I needed to go to the registration office. I lost my shit again and the manager was called in to cool me down. The manager said I was in the right place and he was sorry for the stupidity. I started this whole process at 8am. I ended the entire process at 5 pm. I put in an entire day's worth of work for something that should have taken an hour.

[@hidavidwen]

I remember going to the DMV in California my first week back (to renew my license)...and it was depressing in there. I had to go in because the website wasn't working. Well I never enjoyed going to the DMV to be honest...but yeah I can relate.

[@johansilwouden3403]

That is too bad! Isn't it possible, to conduct such business in the US online? At least, it is in my country, the Netherlands. When my car has had it's yearly vehicle inspection, the mechanic at my car dealership goes to the website of the RDW (Dutch version of the DMV), punches in some codes if my car has passed and after paying 30 euros I am good to go. Same procedure if I want to trade in the car through the dealership. Just have to bring my ownership's documents and in 5 minutes it is done! If you want to sell your car privately, the buyer and seller just go to the nearest postal service, often located in a nearby supermarket or bookstore, and basically do it the same way. If you need new licence plates, for example after theft, you go to a RDW-approved manufacturer in your region. In some cases, you need a police report. The bigger the country, the less advanced government agencies seem to be! Friends in Germany have to show up in person at the German DMV when they have business with their car! They are jealous, that in much smaller countries in Europe, like ours, so much government services can be accessed online!

[@jessicaely2521]

@@johansilwouden3403you need to get your information before you say a countries government isn't advanced 🤦‍♂️. Every state and county has their own rules. I think every state you can do license plate and drivers license stuff online. Really in Florida you didn't have to go in before online payment happened. You could send a check with your paperwork saying it was time to renew and they would give you your license plate sticker and registration. in general yes you can do this stuff without going in. Theres always exceptions to the rule and i was one of the exceptions. When your license plate is suspended you have to show up to the DMV in person. My license plate was suspended. Now I remember why. I was living in Switzerland and my car was in storage. My husband was waiting for his Greencard to be able to stay in the US permanently. Since Covid started my husband wasn't able to get into the US because he was a foreigner and I wasn't going to leave my husband and child. Since this was the case I allowed my license plate to expire. Back in the day when online DMV first started it was an easy fix. Nowadays I guess to many people have taken cars with expired license plate. I don't really know the reason behind the change.

[@Dovndyr13]

The US is a great country. The friendliness of the people is great. And yes North European are more closed towards strangers. I think people both in the UK and Spain can be much warmer towards strangers. What makes European think of Americans as superficial is the lack of interest in the other person. That how are you is the same as a Hi. This as well can be seen in the American waitress. She's not interested in you having a good conversation with your friends you have not seen in 6-7 years. It's more about you eating and leaving, so that the there can be another sitting (aka more in tipping).

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Ole. Yeah cultural differences play a big role. The “How are you” doesn’t necessarily mean the person doesn’t care (usually people do!)…but it’s become a customary way of saying “hello” in American culture. I can see how others can be shocked…but yeah Americans say that without even thinking as a way of greeting…

[@paulavitoria1798]

@Ole Portuguese people are really friendly too! But waiters do not intrude on your conversation with your friends...

[@Dovndyr13]

@@paulavitoria1798 European countries where food is a part of the culture and you socialise for hours over food it would be unheard of to have a waiter like that. No matter if Faro in the South or Tromsø in the north It's more Diner's in the USA where you have 1 waiter for x tables and the waiter only wants to serve 1-2 tables. Since the waiter only gets a few dollars an hour, most of the salary comes from tipping. So more costumers means more salary. I have been to 45 countries and only the USA does it like that in the countries

[@squarecircle1473]

Im Dutch living in the Netherlands. That was an interesting and balanced analysis. I find your observation about USA-citzens = standing out vs. Dutch citizens = standing in to be interesting. I think of individualism as a spectrum, with on the one extreme full-on individualism versus on the other end full-on collectivist thought. I can imagine the USA being more on the individualist side than the Netherlands is. That being said, I would still consider the Netherlands being more on the individualist side of the spectrum, than it is located on the collectivist side. I think there are some Asian cultures that are very strongly geared toward the collectivist side of the spectrum. I think it is possible to go deeper into this by deconstructing "society" into different parts, to understand that some parts of society are more expressive of individualism, whereas some parts of society are more expressive of collectivism. It is interesting to think of the ways in which this influences social behaviors, political systems, and so on. Anyway, im thinking out loud. Nice video! All my best! :)

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks so much for your sharing your perspective and for the kind words! And I also love the topics of cultural/societal differences...one thing I've realized over the years (and especially this past year) is the fact that we are very much influenced by our environments-our culture, society, friends, colleagues, family, and childhoods. Have you read Erin Meyer's "Culture Map"? It's one of my favorite books about cultural differences. A lot of research behind it and very well written!

[@squarecircle1473]

@@hidavidwen Thank you for the recommendation, David! Haven't read the book, but I'll write it down for further reference. Indeed: it is very interesting to ponder the extent to which our environment shapes us. The many formative pressures we are subjected to, for good or bad. Add to that the ways our genes predispose us to certain behaviors, conditions, or even attitudes, and we find ourselves influenced by a stunning amount of variables the values of which entirely beyond our control. There is a certain absurdity to that.

[@nasibhuseynov4124]

Hey David, many thanks for all the observations. I like how you connect different points very smoothly :)

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for the kind words!

[@juliebrooke6099]

Customer service is definitely different in the US but which is better is definitely a matter of opinion. I hate being interrupted repeatedly at restaurants by staff asking if I need anything. I also can’t stand being repeatedly approached by shop staff asking if they can help me. If I need any help I’ll ask them.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Julie. Yeah the interruptions are horrible. Especially when you can tell people are having an intimate conversation

[@m.c.bouterse3957]

I worked in Austria with co-workers from different nationalities, with Americans among them. I had a very low self esteem. The American co-workers would give me compliments and tell me what I am doing well. I was not used that somebody give me compliments and o yes they tell me when I do something wrong in there eyes.The contact with the American gave me inner healing and rose my self esteem.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. I think we all need colleagues and friends like that at times. Glad to hear you had good coworkers who treated you with kindness.

[@jengl4401]

I spent 7.5 years in Japan, and recently returned to the US. I only visited once early early on. A lot on your list rings true for me as well. Especially the homeless situation- how fast that got out of hand! Japan has incredible customer service and lives to work so I couldn't agree there but every other point I was nodding along.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Jen. Oh I love Japan…I think probably the best customer service experience in the world. Though I hear the working culture is truly live to work…how has your experience been in Japan so far?

[@calle9368]

As an European am always impressed of how well spoken every American is, how they communicate is a lot better than Europeans. They are always very friendly as well but like many say, it feels fake. In a kebab store here the typical conversation goes: - Yes? - Hi, one kebab please. - Sauce? - Mixed. - 6 euros. *I pay*. -15 min. At least it doesn’t feel fake 😂

[@hidavidwen]

Haha thanks for sharing. Though I do miss how friendly Americans are. I don't care if they are fake if they are strangers though, they make my day. Now...I don't want fake friends though.

[@basengelblik5199]

My busdriver actually knows my name, and he never asks how I am doing, just says "cheer up dude" whenever I look slightly depressed. It's real and it's valuable.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Bas. Oh sounds like you have a great bus driver...reminds me of one bus driver I had when I was in elementary school...he was the coolest guy ever and brightened up my day

[@timdettmann4067]

Love your channel David. However this video reminds me of how living in the U.S. is not so great. Most of my life I have wanted to immigrate to Europe which is very difficult because I do not have a highly sought after skill, plus my children and grandchildren live here. I have traveled most of Europe and love it all. I know that some haters will comment and say if you don't love it than leave it.

[@hidavidwen]

Hi Tim - thanks for stopping by again, appreciate your perspective. Yeah what I've learned so far...it depends on what one values. The US is great for many things. And Europe for many other things too. Would you consider retiring in Europe? I know countries like Portugal/Spain are popular.

[@machtmann2881]

The US is a better place to make money but not as good for living imo. Too much focus on material consumption (why has it been easier to a buy a big TV over the years than to afford housing, education, or healthcare?). Europe has better living benefits but is a lousy place to get rich haha

[@helenagreenwood2305]

@@machtmann2881 it depends how you define richness - are you saying owning lots of possessions makes you rich? I think having less money and a better work/life balance is much more fulfilling than lots of expensive possessions

[@machtmann2881]

@@helenagreenwood2305 Yes, in this case I'm talking about monetary and physical possessions. Having a rich life is quite different and also much more fulfilling imo

[@maulwurf62]

Haters? No, just Americans who never left the 3rd grade playground mentally.

[@grahamsmith9541]

Food in USA is loaded with sugar which some studies have shown to be addictive. Makes profit for the providers sell addictive food. Leads to unhealthy customers, making a profit for the health industry. How many of the options in USA supermarkets are real. How many are made by the same company under different brand names.

[@hidavidwen]

Hi Graham - thanks for the comment. I didn't realize how much sugar until I watched some videos and read some articles on this. Well to be honest, I NEVER read the nutrition labels. I'm sure there are a bunch of studies on this but using my subjective experience with myself and friends... - Most friends who move here from the US lose weight (myself included)...makes sense if you think about all the cycling/walking plus less food options and healthier foods I'm a foodie and definitely miss the food options the US/California has to offer...but I care a lot more about my health now as I am no longer 21 and I see my body changing =)

[@wubbalubadubdub714]

It’s completely up to the consumer. We have every option imaginable here.

[@jessicaely2521]

Most food in the US is loaded with sugar, but not all. I lived in Germany and Switzerland their peanut butter and some of their bread (not all) was extremely sweet to me. I was used to eating sandwich bread with no sugar. Germany and Switzerland tends to put sugar into their bread. The peanut butter in Germany and Switzerland had a huge label saying American Peanut butter. I was suckered into believing it and it was disgustingly sweet. I looked at the sugar content and when compared to the brand I got in the US the Swiss/German had 12 grams more sugar. Again I was used to peanut butter with 0 sugar. All that was in my peanut butter was peanuts, a tiny bit of oil, and a pinch of salt if you use unsalted peanuts. That's it. You looked at the Swiss/German version and it had an extremely long list of things I had no clue what it was. I said to my husband "no wonder people outside the US hates peanut butter. The stuff you get is crap." I made my own peanut butter and my husband (he's Swiss), and his friends (they are Swiss) loved my peanut butter.

[@roseanne9986]

@@hidavidwen Hi David In Europe they put a tax on beverages with added sugar, sweeteners, flavoring are taxed at one of three levels: 25% ad valorem tax on drinks containing >6 g sugar/100mL ( increases from 17% rate) 17% ad valorem tax on drinks containing 0.5-6 g sugar/100mL. When I’m in America I ask for a child’s portion of food and that’s still a large helping.

[@tahiti1]

Thats a very valid point Graham. The reality is that 90% of packaged food in US comes from a handful of conglomerates (including non-US ones such as Nestle) who act in unison in terms of lobbying against higher food standards. Same issue with fresh food and use of pesticides etc

[@TheSimArchitect]

So accurate and refreshing to see a honest review 👏🏻

[@Lea-rb9nc]

A California native here, who has been living on the edge of the Mediterranean since 2007. I've been back once for a family wedding in 2009. I couldn't wait to get back to my little French village... There are no other Americans where I live, and most of the tourists who come here are from other EU countries. I've been to Belgium and Holland a few times, and enjoyed myself very much. I have several neighbors from Holland and some dear friends in a nearby village that are also Dutch. I rarely hear English spoken but that is useful for improving my French. I thought about learning Dutch as I would have easy access to speaking with native Dutch speakers. However, Spain is less than an hour from my home and I love my little trips down there...

[@hidavidwen]

Hi Léa - oh wow that sounds like the dream. Is it? I’d like to hear more about how you made the move and how you enjoy life there

[@lioneldemun6033]

Are you living in Alet ?

[@Lea-rb9nc]

@@lioneldemun6033 No. I'm in a small village in the Corbières.

[@lioneldemun6033]

@@Lea-rb9nc what is the name of that village ? Arques? Mouthoumet?

[@Lea-rb9nc]

@@lioneldemun6033 Why are you asking?

[@euroschmau]

The stark fact is obesity is sharply on the rise in the EU as well. Spain, for instance, is at 24% and is rising the worst amongst children. The Netherlands is at 20%. That said, it is so high in the US largely because of that social pressure you highlighted, and the stress of persistent economic precariousness. I believe stress is the number one factor contributing to being over-weight. In the end, the USA is a miserable country to live in, which makes us fat.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks David for sharing. Stress is a HUGE factor that we don't talk enough about. I'm glad mental health is getting more and more attention. Stress leads to stress eating and drinking for many too. And when we're stressed, it's hard to make the 'right' decisions.

[@sodapop83]

you didn't mention the quality of food, what they put in the food in the usa. the type of obesity - that shocking, grotesque type we rarely see in europe or anywhere else in the world

[@stefaanvl8385]

It's the sugar they put in processed food and above all : THE SODAS ! The body transmutes all the excess sugar into fat. I'll give you a mathematical equation : SODAS + ignorance = obesity. I'll never forget that people took to the streets in protest when NY city mayor Bloomberg wanted to abolish supersized sodas. You could say that these people were fighting for their right to become obese and diabetic and loose their feet and become blind. Only in the US this has ever happened, as far as I know. I don't buy the stress theory : I've often suffered great stress in recent years, yet always kept the same normal weight.

[@euroschmau]

@@stefaanvl8385 I don't drink soda (neither diet nor regular) and I'm still obese. They have crazy high levels of sugary snacks/drinks in all other nations, in particular, thin and lean Japan surprised me at how much junk food is sold. It's the stress stemming from economic and societal insecurity that is making us fat. If we were to implement universal health care and housing costs control, I guarantee obesity will fall to European levels. Plus all the driving we do has to stop...that's stressful, isolating, bad for your health and costly.

[@Limemill]

I don’t think it’s a case for mental health, it’s more of a testament to how messed up the American way of life is (ultra consumerism plus workaholism plus a deregulated / free-for-all labour market plus fast food)

[@humtidumty1]

Question: Does the free everything maybe encourage throwing things away where in a world where you pay for your extras one is aware of the way stuff is getting spoiled?

[@hidavidwen]

Never thought of that but thanks for the food for thought!

[@adarateranroldan]

If you’re referring to food waste, then the answer has to do with restaurants and businesses structure. Restaurants have to justify labor, rent, and utilities. One way they can do it is to offer really fine quality foods is modest or tiny portions. Or they can offer ok-quality food in portions that are two- to three-times what someone needs. The latter feels like a better value, especially when those establishments offer faster service and don’t have an implied dress code.

[@steven-jellemeijer8412]

How do you consider your productivity on either working hours system/culture?

[@hidavidwen]

Yeah interesting question, what do you think?

[@stereocilia]

I lived in Morocco for about 3 years straight. When I came back to the US, I gained 50 pounds (staying with family helped a bit like you said), tried walking everywhere (luckily I was in Hialeah FL so it's slightly walkable), and instantly tried to find the closest source of fresh baked bread. Then covid hit 2 months later and we all know how that goes.

[@hidavidwen]

Omg 50 pounds? Well the sad thing is...I believe you haha. It's hard for me to gain weight naturally...but I always gain 10-15 pounds now when I go back..

[@TabbyQ.9563]

I'm an American who just returned from a trip to Europe. The customer service thing was an issue. I'm not used to having to ask for everything. Usually American servers anticipate your needs. We had to ask for drinks, condiments and the bill every time. In the US, servers will ask, "Would you like another soda?" "Do you need katsup?" "Would you like dessert or are you ready for the bill?"

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Alison. Yeah I find waiters in Europe almost never ask unless you ask them. But according to many here, that’s what good customer service is in Europe-they don’t like to be bothered. Cultural differences :)

[@irissupercoolsy]

But then my question is also: how long did you sit there to eat. Because we mostly sit 1.5-2.5 hours in a restaurant often... It would drive us crazy to be asked things all the time.

[@charlesunderwood6334]

As someone in the UK, that is exactly what I want. Leave me alone unless I ask for something.

[@mediterraneanworld]

it is considered rude to bring the bill unless the customer asks for it

[@hml808]

I agree with most of what you are saying … now compare airports in the US versus airport anywhere else in the world. In most US airports it smells so bad and you just don’t want to go at all - while the other airports around the globe you think you are at the Four Seasons

[@hidavidwen]

Hahah airports. That’s something else. I flew mostly out of SFO and LAX back in California..and now I fly out of Schiphol in Amsterdam and it’s like comparing a Four Seasons to a Holiday Inn.

[@themountainwanderer]

It really is a shocking difference.

[@Carlos-qz7ul]

It's always a pleasure listening to you ! 👌 Greetings from south France 🇫🇷 ! 💚

[@hidavidwen]

Thank you! 😊

[@embriakelley5233]

As an American I myself agree with pretty much everything being said. I feel America is blessed to have all we do but we don't use those blessings in the right or best ways. Like we have alot of food here or did, but we eat too much. I was really surprised to watch videos in the UK where their portion sizes were so much "smaller " then ours. Then I heard that it's one of the reasons why they are skinnier in the uk, because the portion is smaller and they are more active then the US. Makes sense. And I hate how we are so prosperous here but have the homeless problem and how places will just throw away good food instead of giving it away. I can't believe it, it's ridiculous. And another problem is the distance between stores especially in rural areas, you need a vehicle and that cuts down on people walking. I love America because God blessed us and what it use to stand for but yes it definitely needs change.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Embria, I get you. Lots of things I do love about the US. Lots of things Europe gets right. One thing I’ll add also is how the countries and constructed. America is built for driving. The Netherlands is built for cycling. And the food ingredients are healthier here as well.

[@dasmaurerle4347]

It always makes me appreciate how similar some of our European cultures are when an American compares Europe to America. And since you're Dutch(sort of...🤗): Thanks for reminding me of how much I love the Netherlands 😍 Greetings from Germany

[@hidavidwen]

Haha thanks Das! I laughed when you said I was sort of Dutch =) I was talking to a friend recently...and while I don't believe I've become Dutch at all...I've actually become Dutch in many ways...what I eat for example (lots of bread)...and I've become a lot more direct and honest as well. Thanks for your comment and greetings from Amsterdam!

[@jonathano.7109]

I don't completely agree with what you've said about customer service. In Spain you can enjoy the 'sobremesa', just chilling and chatting after the meal. In the USA I always get the sensation I need to order or hurry up and finish. Great video, though. Check out the Camino de Invierno the next time you want to walk across Spain.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for the perspective Jonathan! Oh yeah I would love to do more Camino’s in The future (plan to)!

[@ItsRope]

where do you have to pay for the toilet? I've only seen that at festivals and some gasstations. But never in a restaurant or something

[@hidavidwen]

That's a good point. I did have to pay (ironically) at Maastricht McDonalds though a few years back.

[@m8852]

One of the reasons I don't enjoy eating out at restaurants with wait staffs (in the US) is the constant interruption from the wait staff, asking me if I need "anything," "am I doing okay," "do I need more water" (when I've only drunk 10% of the water in the glass). It's annoying.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Mark. Haha I just replied to an American who was frustrated at the opposite-no one ever asks in Europe if you need something. Cultural differences

[@mariusb5150]

Note: the US used to have a very decent infrastructure for public transportation, until the car industry destroyed in the early sixties. They got got a conviction for it, but the infrastructure never got built back.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Marius.

[@kellypeters5379]

I wanna correct you on one thing. In The Netherlands we don't teach our children to be average. We teach them that you don't have to stand out to be special and that it is okey to be average. There is a huge diference there that I think is important. That is where the phrase comes from. Just act normal ( as in your version of normal, just be yourself ) that is already crazy enough.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Kelly :) yes that’s a big difference. Though I’ve heard from quite a few Dutchies that they really disliked “doe normaal” because they were different or wanted to be different growing up

[@davidmusset3435]

I’m French and I think the us customer service is the best! We can learn from you guys

[@hidavidwen]

I do miss US customer service despite what others say about it...the service can really make the "experience"

[@elcamino4799]

Hi, David as a global citizen...Amazing! These days, I'm glad to share your life story. I can say I like your way of life. I think you know how to organize and communicate about the environment in which you live and the values ​​you consider important. I think this video, culture shock, is quite controversial. I think it is necessary to distinguish between a culture shock caused by a society's long cultural background and a social problem, that is, a structural problem. A simple culture shock is related to the problem of mutual understanding, but the social structural problem requires change, reform, and resolution. I'm interested in social issues and I like to talk about them, but English is not my first language, so I have limits to expressing my thoughts in English. Nevertheless, thanks a lot. This video made me think about the problem of difference and diversity and the issues of right and wrong.

[@hidavidwen]

Hey hey! I'm so happy to hear that you can relate. Well the point is not to be controversial...but I can understand if it is. But the goal is to open up dialogue. And for me to learn as well. And if it got you to think about the problem of cultural differences...then I am happy. Your English is great by the way! And I appreciate you.

[@elcamino4799]

@@hidavidwen I'm happy to hear your warm and humble words this morning. "To open up dialogue. And for me to learn as well." Touching! What a good start!!! Puedo sentir tu cuidado. Gracias también. Entonces, adiós, hasta luego. Cuídate bien!

[@daluzsoares]

I drove through the streets of Philadelphia beyond all the trash I saw this was very sad to see all those homeless people and then see how selfish people can be to make their dream come true!!

[@hidavidwen]

Oh yeah I've seen videos of Philadelphia too...it is very sad to see people on the streets =(

[@godbyelebenohnegott]

About customer service: As Europeans we know that staff cannot possibly personally care for ach customer. Human psychology does not work like that. If they do appear to personally care for us, we know it's fake and can even be very annoyed by it - like why do they think I need that? I'm not in a child anymore. We do expect staff to be polite and attentive when we call for them. That's enough. If they are unfriendly, they will get no tip from me. Although technically service staff does not need my tip to survive, they still like the additional income.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Yeah that’s the difference, waiters/waitresses work for tips in the US as compared to Europe. So you want to be especially friendly and provide great customer service (at times it’s too much)

[@oreol7810]

In U.S., it is very common for strangers to randomly start a conversation about anything anywhere. A lot of people actually enjoy talking to their waiters and waitresses. I went to my regular dental appointment last week. It lasted about an hour and the nurse was chatting with me the whole time, from dental hygiene products, to her divorce, from her upcoming trip to Cancun to her daughter college life. We were complete strangers. 😅 I am the type of person who does not like to be bothered frequently by waiters, but I can understand why the U.S. customer service is the way it is.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing, very relatable :)

[@danchien1504]

Great video! It's nice to hear about your perspective after moving to a different country for a few years. We hope you come back to the US in the future, but glad to see you enjoy Amsterdam :)

[@hidavidwen]

Hah thanks Dan. We will see, I miss the US and family and friends =)

[@anda013]

Yes, usa has big grocery stores you have to drive to but here in europe we have at least 3 diffrent grocery stores in walking distance and also we dont need so much selection of ready made dinners and cake mixes because we cook our dinners (and not just reheat it) and bake our cakes from scratch.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Haha oh my…I still buy microwaveable dinners from my local supermarket here. Must’ve picked this up from the US :/ (Well I just want to save time hahah)

[@mavadelo]

1:13 Those Amstedam numbers are wrong. Those are only the people known by the GGD (a health organisation). Currently it is estimated that there are between 3000 and 4000 homeless in Amsterdam. In the entire country it is estimated to be about 36k. I have been homeless in my younger years and have worked for them after that. All in all I have about 4 decades of experience with them in Amsterdam, Utrecht and Nijmegen specifically. I always find it funny how Americans make a big deal about paying taxes for healthcare and such but find it totally normal that the customer pays the salary of a waiter/waitress or that they are entitiled to free things like using a public toilet. Something that has to be maintained and cleaned. Besides that.... if you are a paying customer in a cafe, restaurant or whatever... there is no fee. You pay in places like railway stations and airports because those toilets are run by a company that provides that service, seperate from the airport/railway station. Same for the public toilets you see in some cities where you pay a fee to enter a selfcleaning toilet boot. Weird how in the most capitalistic nation on earth people feel so entitled to getting things free unless it helps other people than them. I remember when the Netherlands was build for driving. This went on untill around the early 80's. The we realised that car filled cities were bad for our mood, bad for our environment, bad for our (road)safety etc. Over the next decades we started converting from driveable cities to bikeable and walkable cities. The US can do the same thing. Just don't expect it to be done in a few years or it to be cheap. As for national transportation.... Modern America was build on railroads, it should be actually quite easy to roll out a regional and national railway grid. We did in Europe and that is dozens of countries needing to work together instead of states. We know have an interconnecting ralway grid that can bring you from Narvik in Norway to Algeciras in Spain. Famous Dutch saying "Just do normal and you will be acting crazy enough". It is not about being average, you are very welcome to stand out. It is the need to stand out, to be "better" than someone else, that is what we talk about. Stand out by your actions, that is totally fine. We all love those that achieve great things. Don't make it a lifegoal though and above all, don't think you are better than others because you can do this random thing better than someone else who most likely can do some other random thing better than you

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing all this! Yeah I'm sure the homeless numbers are higher everywhere. But relative to San Francisco, it's nothing. Yeah it's interesting how the infrastructure of the Netherlands has changed (I remember going to a museum here in Amsterdam learning about that).

[@mdex8202]

Hahahaha “doe gewoon”! My parents are from Nederland and I heard that ALL the time while I was growing up.

[@jarnobot]

Very interesting video! As for the the big supermarkets, those kinda come with thing you pointed out after that: long driving distances. The US generally has strict zoning laws and car centric infrastructure. This means that those big stores are often not in a walkable distance, and even if they were, you might not feel safe walking to them. This also means that the dependence on owning a car is very high, which can be a problem, especially for people that can't afford a car. In contrast: I live in a mid-sized Dutch city, close to the city center. I can think of at least 4 supermarkets that are within a 5 minute walk, many more if you make it a 10 minute walk. I feel totally safe when I'm walking to those supermarkets and so far I haven't felt the need to buy a car at all. The smaller size of the supermarkets and all of them having self checkout options available gives me the ability to get something from the store very quickly. Being home within 10-15 minutes is very normal to me. The channel NotJustBikes really opened my eyes on how well our Infrastructure is designed. You might want to check it out if this interests you.

[@hidavidwen]

Oh yes I do love the fact that there are supermarkets everywhere and they are all walkable from my apartment. And I’ve never felt unsafe in Amsterdam. Also love that channel too. Thanks for your comment!

[@maglow6807]

Hello David! Interesting insights on the two cultures and the background is interesting too!

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Mag!

[@mantelikukkapenkki2368]

You have lived in the Netherlands for years, why do you still refer to their customs and practices as if they were universally European. You don't have to pay for using the toilet, ketchup or bread in a restaurant if you are a customer everywhere in Europe, it's actually quite rare. Greetings from Finland

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Manteli for sharing. I did mention my experiences from Netherlands but yeah Europe is big. Well it’s kind of like when people refer to America and America is made up of 50 states…and California is very different from Texas…perhaps it’s a habit thing that we all generally refer to America and Europe? Though you’re right and thanks for the feedback, I will try to be more mindful!

[@rczv]

@@hidavidwen You kind of made it worse, no offense, 😂. The US is one country within America, Europe is made up of 44 countries. Even within the European Union (27 countries), most people do not have a European identity: they identify as German, Romanian, Dutch, etc. That's why it's very weird to hear someone say that something's like this or that in Europe, I think there are really few universally European things. Cheers from Czechia.

[@gn.punpun]

@@hidavidwen it's even more complex than that. The USA is largely homogeneous unlike Europe which has numerous distinct and diverse cultures and ethnicities. Just to mention, southern and northern Europeans are very different with few similarities

[@denisdaly1708]

Ya, agree, everything free in Ireland and the UK

[@lzak3865]

On a side note, I’m digging those velvet paintings behind you. I’d kill for the Life Aquatic one!

[@crystalpupa5307]

thank you for this video. i just moved to europe about 8 months ago and there are so many things I miss about the US but there are so many downsides too. great ending statement about being a global citizen. i'm with you there! it makes for a complex identity when you pull away from what you know and gain new experiences.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Crystal. 8 months is still very fresh, so I wish you well and have fun!

[@davyvanoers6324]

I live in the Netherlands for 38 years now. And i have never seen a restaurant or mc Donalds where you have to pay for the toilet. Some clubs offers a stamp or coin for 1 euro to go to the toilet for the rest of the day, and even than is rare. Even if you are shopping and you have to go to the toilet. Just walk into a restaurant! That wont be a problem.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks Davy! I should’ve added a bit more details saying it was a shock to have to pay in general like at malls, train stations, etc. I remember having to pay to use the McDonalds toilet in Maastricht when I first arrived (but you’re right not all of them). But true..I’ve certainly gone in many restaurants and asked to use the toilet :)

[@bibiblocksberg7051]

"live to work" vs "work to live" - There's a very simple "right-or wrong-answer", in my opinion. It's weird that someone appreaciate the politeness of a service in a restaurant, while knowing that the service is just so polite because he/she is gaining for a high tip, because otherwise he/she won't have enough money to live, after he/she worked 11/12 hours a day.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your perspective Bibi

[@CarlosGarcia-gs1wd]

A few years ago, we went to another city to visit my cousins, we asked them where we could buy some sweets that my father always bought, they started laughing and almost fought to see who was with us. They told us the sweets are extraordinary, but the confectionery staff is very, very special. When we arrived, there were two customers. As they saw that we were foreigners, they gave us their place... and together with my cousin, they got ready to watch the show. .. it was something between rude and surreal, when we finished, my cousin and the two clients told us that people put up with their rudeness because their sweets are exquisite, also if you know them, you just limit yourself to asking for what you want, without a word too much and above all without asking them for suggestions. No one leaves a tip there, but at the few tables where they serve coffee and sweets, people enjoy the best cakes and also the show.

[@CaminDallas]

About the experience at the restaurant, you don't pay extras everywhere in Europe. In France, restrooms are free, same for condiments and bread. Paying for them seems to be specific to Netherlands and a few other countries.

[@MrBrownstone1]

Yeah, you don't do that in UK either. I've been to Amsterdam too, and don't recall paying for that kind of thing. Not saying it's not true, as this dude has lived there for 4 years, but I don't remember it happening. So maybe not every establishment?

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Free French bread…I’m salivating…

[@JustinCase99999]

I don't know about the Netherlands but here in France bread in the restaurant is free. In fact most of the time it's already there on the table before we order. The goal is to not eat all of it before ordering. 😄

[@hidavidwen]

Never had free bread in the Netherlands! Haha in the US, some places have really really good bread as free appetizers.

[@JustinCase99999]

@@hidavidwen Not to be partial or anything but you have to try real French bread in France from a boulangerie in the morning. Then you'll understand what bread is. 😉

[@lumina9995]

In Germany, you do get free bread, condiments and can use the toilet in restaurants for free! What's not free is coffee refills and water. You can ask for tap water but usually you order as food is not that expensive and drinks are what the restaurateur makes a profit off. I don't know about the Netherlands... What's free and what isn't.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for the response! Yeah I was so surprised to pay for a packet of ketchup…at quite a few places. I always feel a bit uncomfortable asking for free tap water in restaurants in Europe because I always get stares…but like you said, it’s where they make profits. In the US, tap water is always served for free and one never feels uncomfortable asking for it. Interesting!

[@lumina9995]

@@hidavidwen Well I think the staring problem is overestimated. Or people self-consciously assume people are staring when it is not the case at all, because they expect it or have heard about it. As to the tap water, I wouldn't order it as my only drink, but with something else that I pay for.

[@agn855]

@@hidavidwen - I'm a bit surprised that people (like you) seem to expect that the American way of doing things is something other countries should be longing for?! While German tab water is checked 24/7, in other countries that might not be the case (or treated with chlorine and/or other stuff) therefore people - outside their homes ie in restaurants - prefer drinking bottled water, besides the fact that un-sparkled tab water is kinda meh for north-/middle-Europeans. And BTw, that tab water in American restaurants isn't free. The owner has to pay it, and he'll let someone pay for it in return. Guess whom!?

[@kencarpenter2785]

I enjoyed your remarks! It made me reflect on a similar experience of culture shock when I returned to the States. I was not prepared for it. I had clearly changed! One of the funny moments was when I began using the word acquaintance instead of friend, which we use freely, after knowing someone for 5 minutes! I recall a raised eyebrow, the first time I introduced someone as an ‘acquaintance’!

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Ken. Haha yeah friend vs. acquaintance-I get that now. Are you back in the US or?

[@kencarpenter2785]

@@hidavidwen I’ve been back in the States for a long time. HOWEVER, I was able to obtain dual-citizenship with my late mothers homeland, Austria, which I had frequently visited while I lived in Europe. I was very fond of my great aunt, who was also an artist. So now, with an Austrian passport and EU travel card, I would very much like to return, this fall, for an extended trip, including the Netherlands, which I fell in love with, a few years ago!!! Covid has me a bit concerned, but I hear all sorts of stories and, encouragement to ‘just GO’!

[@b.carrie837]

The portions served in the restaurants in the us are also crazily large, we usually share 1 portion with two.

[@oeyt1982]

I agree, food regulations in the EU and UK are stricter than the US. Sometimes variety tends you to hoard on processed food.

[@oeyt1982]

I also noticed that American products have longer shelf life than the ones i normally pick up produced in the EU.

[@bcvanrijswijk]

There is no such thing as free stuff. In one way or another you pay for everything.

[@hidavidwen]

In most cases, true :)

[@ElektrotechnikmitMarcRombs]

Thanks for your video. How do people in the US raise kids when they work to 11 pm ?

[@hidavidwen]

You're welcome. Not everyone works until 11pm. But for those that do...yeah it's not easy

[@ggir9979]

I am going to be a contrarian here, but as a european I really grew to like customer service in US restaurants. In Europe, going to a restaurant can be a painfull experience made of endless waiting, trying to grab the attention of the waiter, looking desperatly at your empty glass feeling very thirsty. And they never seem to want to get you the check. So yeah, when they dont over do it, it's nice to get a refill before you even have to ask and the bill waiting for you to pay whenever you're ready.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your experience and hearing another perspective!

[@NAKMEEZY]

As an American currently living in Rotterdam, I agree with most of your points. I've been here 5.5 years and I can't wait to get back. There is a huge backstabbing culture (at work) here that we don't have in the US. This place kinda sucks lol

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing. Sounds like you haven’t had the best experience in the Netherlands. The backstabbing culture…sorry to hear…do you think that is specific to your situation/company?

[@NAKMEEZY]

@@hidavidwen It's dutch culture, Americans tell you how they feel. Many Dutch will smile in your face and then switch up on you afterwards. I didn't want to believe that but I have seen and experienced it many times. They also nitpick at everything. "Ja, Maaaar...." is a favorite thing to say here. I think it's a nice country but culturally too different for me. I'm from Brooklyn NYC by the way.

[@floyd6579]

@@NAKMEEZY I was born in Rotterdam and live here as well. As a dutch Guy, I can tell you that Europeans are more direct overall then Americans. But Dutch people are even in the rest of Europe known for their directness, and sometimes things we say can be hurthfull. I think it’s also because of how are language works. When we translate dutch word for word in english, It doesn’t always translates properly for how we try to say it. And If there is any place in The Netherlands where the people are most direct, I can for sure tell you it’s Rotterdam. You knop what they say here. Geen woorden maar daden. Of,niet lullen maar poetsen

[@NAKMEEZY]

@@floyd6579 I agree that Rotterdamers tend to be very direct, but there is also a tendency to avoid confrontation or fold under pressure. This is not the case in NYC. We are direct and stand on what we say. I also live in Rotterdam btw.

[@floyd6579]

@@NAKMEEZY I don’t think we try to avoid confrontations. If it’s because we say `Ja maar’ , that is usually said because we don’t like to be told that we are in the wrong. So we use excuses that benefit our opinion in certain discussions. We don’t like to admit of we are in the wrong. But I don’t see how that’s avoiding discussion

[@ZWD2011]

It is always interesting to see interpretations of culture differences.To me it seems it al lot of it is only about quantity. More homeless people, more billboards, more working hours, more choice. Here in NL our attitude is more like: relax, enough is enough. A thing to remember: there's no such thing as a free lunch. You pay for these free things in another way, e.g. having to tip more. So the bill is distributed in another way. And pay for toilets in NL? Not common. People will avoid these places.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing! Haha yes no such thing as free...though many of us fall for the marketing trap

[@joebloggs2473]

Very political David; well done. After four years you are just experiencing reverse culture shock. I have lived in the Netherlands now for 60 years. I left the UK at 17. I felt the biggest shock came after 10 years. By then language was totally no problem as I was really bilingual. I was turning Dutch and I had not been back to the UK for eight years. The RCS was incredible; I did not know the country and I missed so much of my new country. The big thing I love here is the freedom and the freedom to choose to work to live. Also not living in a class ridden society. My CEO was Kees and we often had lunch together even though we worked for a very old engineering consultants.

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing Joe. I’m at 4 years and cannot imagine 60! I can just imagine all that you have experienced here. But it’s good to hear that you seem to love living in the Netherlands.

[@joebloggs2473]

@@hidavidwen Thanks David. I would not be anywhere else TBH.

[@MissAmie1989]

I am from the UK and I am currently travelling around New England with my husband and baby for a month, while we are on shared parental leave. We go to restaurants during the day for lunch because we need to be in early in the evenings for my daughter to sleep. I haven’t noticed the service to be especially better than in Europe (we have travelled to many countries in Europe). Although we were expecting it because of videos like these. The only difference is how quickly everything happens, like ordering, food arriving etc. which means that a meal that we would expect to drink a bottle of wine and have dessert takes only 45mins. We no longer order that wine. Also, it is very difficult to get a healthy lunch at a restaurant. It seems that the lunchtime foods are alway burgers, burritos, larger sandwiches etc with fries. I was expecting the food to be vastly superior to the UK but it seems to generally be just as unhealthy. There’s just more of it. The food is much better in France, Italy, Spain etc Very much enjoyed your video 🙂

[@hidavidwen]

Thanks for sharing your perspective. Healthy food in the USA...well of course there are...but there are many more options for unhealthy food like burritos and burgers =) Foodwise...I do think it depends on where you are and what you like. For example, I find the food scene in LA to be one of the best I've ever experienced (you have many big ethnic neighborhoods and authentic foods but you have to drive everywhere). And thanks for the kind words and contributing too!