Honoring parents-the most MISUNDERSTOOD commandment

The real truth about the fifth commandment of the ten commandments--to honor parents--and how a better understanding will make you a better parent.
For more classes from Rabbi Shais Taub visit www.soulwords.org/
👉 Share & Connect:
Follow on Instagram: rabbi_shais_taub
Follow on TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@rabbi_shais_taub
Subscribe to WhatsApp: wa.me/15164953021/?text=Subscribe
👉 Support our work at:
www.soulwords.org/donate/
--OR--
PayPal: www.paypal.com/paypalme/soulwordspayments
CashApp: cash.app/$soulwords
Venmo: venmo.com/u/soulwords

[@l.5832]

For decades I mistook "honour' with "obey". My mother was abusive and narcissistic. Her demands on me were unlimited. She set me up to fail. When I challenged her, I was told I had to 'honour' her. That does not mean obey every demand. I honoured my mother by leaving and making my own contribution in the world rather than staying as her personal slave where God's purpose for my life would never be realized. By living my life honourably, I bring honour to my parents.

[@rabblerousin8981]

Wow. Your reflections are profound and I think you’re right. Will need to continue thinking on this because I think you just blew my mind and hopefully helped me move forward. 🩵

[@AllasMusicChannel]

🌟

[@sandrawelch4893]

How can you honor a parent when they're not even honorable... My mother punches me in the chest and says FU and I'm an adult... No one deserves that treatment but she tells my sister she deserved it😢

[@l.5832]

@@sandrawelch4893 You honour her by not becoming her. You become a better person than she is. So despite how bad she is, she has a daughter who has integrity. If it helps, replace 'honour your mother' with 'be a credit to your mother'.

[@sandrawelch4893]

@@l.5832 Thank you that makes it 🐻 bearable🙏💖🌹

[@electricLuLuland]

The manual says "parents, do not provoke your children to anger."

[@VenusFire314]

That is invisible to their eyes.Some parents want respect and the role goes with acting respectful.They see the child as less of a human being and they the adult as a God but they are not a God.

[@VenusFire314]

Parents are too Egotistical to interpret or mentally accept the meaning of this lesson.

[@sunnyadams5842]

I see now, @ 58, that my parents loved to make me cry. 😢 And then I was called over-emotional and out of control. 😢❤

[@sharoncarolbrand1645]

yep!!!

[@qdee6250]

@@sunnyadams5842 parent and sibling for me, not both parents. hard to heal but we can do it. You know now, the REAL truth. You were never the broken one. I wish you happy, liberated healing now.

[@arisilberman4190]

My parents sat me down at 12 years old and asked me if I thought I knew right from wrong. They explained that this was a time when many parents made lots of new rules for their teenagers. After hearing that I knew the difference, they said, that I should expect to gave permission to do what I wanted so long as they did not think it dangerous. The only thing they asked was that I tell them where I was going and with whom and leave the home number of my friends. If I went elsewhere, I would call and tell them where I was. They gave me so much freedom that I would never have betrayed their trust. That I believe is how one honors our parents.

[@LastingHope]

Wow, mutual respect. What a gift 💝

[@wendychavez5348]

My parents did something similar. They certainly has rules, which got looser as we matured; they also had clearly understood consequences for breaking the rules, and before meeting out discipline, they would discuss with us what the transgression was, and how it should be handled. I learned to take responsibility for my actions from a very young age, and when I do something "wrong" it's a conscious choice and I'm prepared to endure the consequences.

[@wendychavez5348]

​@@LastingHope, you're right! Respectful parenting counts for a lot!

[@AmaranthineIntrigue]

I love this!

[@Di...747]

Right on! I did the same with my child. I now have a strong, Independent loving woman as a daughter.

[@laraoneal7284]

Everyone teaches honor ur parents but no one quotes “Do not provoke ur children to wrath “. How convenient.

[@lehakwelesetla1631]

Yess...🙏 smh 😔😢that we have wounds that never heal sitting in the churches congregation. A lovely way of making us feel like peasants while parents always put on the fuckin padistol 🤬😡

[@mariewallace7250]

It's so true! ❤

[@BrianKlumker]

One thing is for certain and that’s the parents feel they are always right regardless of the truth based solely on age and the commandment of honoring thy parents. I have finally accepted this fact and my broad shoulders have become more comfortable with this yoke of inconvenient truth. Please forgive them Heavenly Father as they know not what they do

[@sunnyadams5842]

​@@lehakwelesetla1631I feel ya and have lived the experience. ❤

[@richellesteyn]

I'm not Jewish but I absolutely love your wisdom.

[@m.asammy3049]

Absolutely!!!

[@SassyO100]

Same ❤

[@macareuxmoine]

Same here 🥰

[@doreenlane2370]

Me too. His wisdom is gold

[@longriderxx]

Me also .. wisdom is without all.

[@mtc-j9i]

I went through this as a child. I realized I wasn’t prepared for life when I was about 18 and was seen as easy prey wherever I went by the most toxic people in any environment. That began a lifelong quest for my identity. In the end, I tried to be free and my mother tried to destroy me. All I ever heard growing up was how much she was sacrificing and how miserable her life was. I’ve never experienced motherly love. I’m now in my 40s and have had to cut her off. It was the hardest thing I’ve had to do, but it was necessary. I’m a mother now, and I am trying to do things the right way. As the family scapegoat, I am the one who broke free. This message needs to go viral.

[@laraoneal7284]

Ty Rabbi so much for clarifying this. I come from childhood trauma and I’ve never heard this discussed. I went NO CONTACT from my parents over 20 years ago. My childhood was hell. Christians told me “how could u disrespect ur parents like this”? The question should have been “how could my parents commit a disgusting act on a 5 year old child “? I have left all organized religion also bc of no support in my recovery process. Subbed.

[@LastingHope]

Those that said that to you were ignorant and cold hearted. I’m so sorry that you were hurt in what should have been a safe place. I’ve also been hurt by church people. They are just people. Forgive them and work on your Faith. Don’t let someone’s words rob you of a relationship with God. You are so worth a life of Faith ❤

[@VenusFire314]

Congratulations, for leaving.Their behavior sets children up for abusive adult relationship.

[@CC-wy1gn]

I left my narcissistic family system (mother, father, brother) at 47 after G-d said to depart and not be entangled anymore. My church community said Have you forgiven them?! They did not understand by my separating from their abuse I was preventing them from actively sinning against me and protecting myself from being sinned against. I was suffering physically and emotionally. There was a current smear campaign going on as I the scapegoat walked out. Does that make me the giraffe? As in now I can be who I am -walking tall-without shame. I’m so sorry for your experience. Religion hurts. But a real & raw relationship with the Most High heals. Sometimes the most honor comes by honoring G-d and walking out of dishonoring situations like you did. When you do that you are loving G-d and your neighbor.

[@VenusFire314]

@@CC-wy1gn Proud of your love for yourself.Excellent🙌🙌More people need to have healthy self esteem for themselves like you,now you can teach this to other.

[@user-zy8gk2nn7d]

there are conditions in order to be forgiven - did narcs ask for forgiveness, did they offer remuneration ? no - so according to the Bible you do not owe them forgiveness - you leave them to God and to his judgment. Besides forgiveness can be done for some act but not deliberate years of abusing child - this is not a sin - this is in order to damage and kill a child - this is a pure wicked deliberate consistent evil. smakintosh channel is referring to this abuse of Bible teachings in case you are interested (kzbin.info/www/bejne/rIakq4WQorCXZtU)

[@glamasaurus]

I watched this after watching the scapegoat/cycle breaker video. I grew up in a narcissist family system and am working to end the cycle. On my daughter's 16 birthday she sent her father and myself a text that made both of us cry and helped me realize I am breaking the cycle.

[@SoulWords]

Amazing! This is the generation!

[@carlagrado7201]

Such a wonderful comment. I also come from a disfunctional family. I have also seen the video you mentioned and then came here. Saddly, I don't have the same experience. I am breaking the cycle, by not having children. And I am still broken at 48 years old. I am a Catholic, and yes this is the generation. We will see God's Mercy and Healing. God bless.

[@ZLLi661]

You know life is pretty good and maybe you’re on the right track of being a good parent when your own kids say loving or respectful or thoughtful things to you, your father their siblings or do certain things for other family members, and sometimes with you that never in a million years could have ever happened in the family you grew up with. That they feel comfortable around you, that they are happy to spend time with you.

[@davidpoulin6536]

My parents gave me everything when I was growing up. I’m 33 years old now and realize that I lived most my life in the Hansel and Gretel story. - everything looks good from the outside of the candy house but inside is where the witch (my mother) was making me fat of all types of lies, self egocentric believes and manipulation so that unconsciously she could eat my soul for her own validation and sake … I grew up with no self confidence and couldn’t think for my self until about 5years ago. I still like my parents for the good parts. I also have gratitude towards them but they’re not my best friends. -Don’t be scared to say no guys. Your boundaries are the container of a healthy soul.

[@lvcretius]

Gaslighting?

[@ginaiosef]

@@lvcretius ... and more.

[@gretchenthedevil9209]

Same here … figured it out when my dad became sick of cancer and my brother startet to acting out like a vicious brat against me and turned all the family against me just to get also my share of our inheritance. After I did a therapie I started to see through all the bs and why I always felt not too attached to my family … cause I was different - the truthteller … oh boy would I‘ve run when i had already knew what will come after me the following years. It has cost me a family by myself and 8 years of my life

[@laurielowy1880]

😊😊

[@williehouston4153]

I love you Mr. Rabbit because you are absolutely right🎉🎉🎉.

[@LeadershipStrength]

Rabbi, I'm not Jewish and I am being tremendously blessed by your teachings. I did not have narcissistic parents but your teachings have been so helpful. As parents and children, we need to walk in humility and an abundance of love. Thank you for your ministry.

[@caterinabonadiooconnor9982]

❤❤❤

[@chilu80]

It took me 40 years to realise the narcissism in my family. I don't know if I can completely heal from the damage done. But I have promised myself to break the cycle.

[@jodybellon4206]

Finally a Rabbi with some Seichel talking about real issues and how to behave as a human being, religious or not

[@jhh2001]

Agreed, some big brass Seichel !!

[@timorthelame1]

It takes a lot more than spawning a child and abusing them their whole life to be a parent. That much I cannot honor.

[@Bronte866]

Honor is born of respect. Respect is earned.

[@elainesmith5313]

Rabbi....it really difficult to honor parents who have not shown you as a child or an adult respect. But respect and honor are expected of you. Being reminded of how much they have done for you??? Except for the necessities of life...food...clothing...shelter . No love, compassion, empathy. I attempted to be a good daughter for yrs but it was never enough. ( The heavy burdens and anger they raised up in me was terrible). Narcissist patents are to worst. I removed myself from the Abuse at age 44yrs and walked away. Sad but necessary. Being TRAMA Bonded to someone is the worst. Thank you!!

[@kimberlychilstrom6888]

Went through this also ..narcisst parents..golden child sister ..ughh

[@ThingsILike12]

@@kimberlychilstrom6888Same. God bless them but my love will have to be from afar.

[@JohnSmith-ks5xw]

@@ThingsILike12 Yes, I am also learning this powerful technique. Hate and anger actually keep us attached to them. Loving them from a distance is a superpower I am learning. For right now, it's a process, but one day I will get to the point where I don't create any negative emotions at all when I think of them. One day soon I hope.

[@miracles424]

No love? If they weren’t loving you, you wouldn’t pass the week 1 of your life. What a bunch of ungrateful people you are. Love is show in clothes, food, medical care, etc. But at some point you should grow up and fill your own holes

[@errolpippin6036]

​@@JohnSmith-ks5xwi wish i could find that peace,its like my mother is my energy vampire,bit when i come from compassion and empathy and love,im not affected,but i allow jer to trigger me,i will do good for up to six seven days,then bam im teiggered,i think i harboe deep resentment,but im conscious of it and working on it.

[@copacetic21]

I remember years ago reading: " How can you honor the dishonorable? " R. Masters. So instead of not honoring at all. I honor with some distance in between.

[@Jannet0476]

Best comment I Crossed so far.👍

[@julybutterfly]

Rabbi, I think I gained more therapy and healing in regard to my own childhood in this one talk / teaching, than I have in any therapist's office. You also validated my practice for when I'm with my nephew. As I'm not a parent, I never know if I am doing the right thing by him. I believe it is every adults job to protect and guide the children, any child, no matter where they come from. And not to burden them with our own worries. Thank you, thank you. I am so grateful to have stumbled upon your channel!

[@SoulWords]

I’m happy you found this channel too

[@heatherv.3320]

🥺💔 I thank God for waking me up and allowing me to shed the belief that I was born to protect my mother. She allowed me to be abused from a very young age, and i felt like it was my job to keep her safe. Sick stuff. Only took 38 years to walk away.

[@mudchat4486]

And you are loved beyond your ability to comprehend. And I pray that you always work to re-parent yourself, and that you are led to exactly what it takes , each and every day. For you to know. that you are SO important. and your best days are to come. Always honor yourself deeply. re-parent. make this a habit. and talking aloud to yourself, too, the body and mind and heart hears this. it matters. YOU matter so very much. You will have very good things. retrain the mind, and bit by bit by bit with consistency. Heal , and know that you are the most important child of God - the most important a child can be. Really do the re-parenting. The kingdom of heaven is within, and I pray for your full healing and full self-full-ness.

[@heatherv.3320]

🙏

[@ravenwynde1]

@@mudchat4486 Thank you ❤️

[@Christi-TV]

Bless you...this year ends 40 years of me trying to prove my value and worth in the Earth to the mother of my birth...I am Enough according to the God of More than Enough

[@adamb7120]

I will simplify this somewhat. Because ive deeply meditated on this. I believe many parents misconstrue worship with honor. Its honor thy father and thy mother not worship thy father and thy mother. Honor is about a moral level of respect and dignity. Worship is what many insecure immature maybe narsasistic parents expect from a child or children thats when we run into problems.

[@mudchat4486]

boom. so super boom. nailed it.

[@danyelleorr-mcneil4711]

​@mudchat4486 so super boom 🤣 I'm using this now, thank you.

[@caterinabonadiooconnor9982]

❤

[@rioourpuprioourpup9535]

Wow! Please more on this parenting topic!!! I have been emotionally leaning on my daughters too!!! I will stop this asap!!! Please speak more on how to fix , heal and mend!

[@HIS6171]

I’ve been seeking Abba on for answers. Ur lesson helped me so much. No matter what I love my parents and honor them. No matter what has happened I could never wish upon or return evil for evil. Now they need me and I pray that serving their needs will help me find peace.

[@alkebabish]

As somebody with a narcisstic father, this was challenging to listen to at times. The image of how my father sees me has the opposite effect of giving me moral courage. But, this talk was very illuminating since I hope to be the one that breaks the cycle

[@Christi-TV]

HOW HOLY FATHER SEES YOU IS PURE JOY AND LOVE AND ADORATION, our earth fathers have not shown us this example Bless you and you Heal and become Free ❤

[@loriprice425]

God bless you! I had a horrific childhood as a child of divorced parents. Under my mother’s roof I suffered physical abuse under her fathers roof I suffered sexual abuse. My father fought for custody of me after my step dad shot my mother. So I never even thought his parenting was lacking and I always believed I was a burden, no value and damaged beyond repair. I was the family scapegoat placed in the role by my step mother. Took me 48 years to recognize this, and just as soon as I recognized it, I realized I had done the same to my daughter. I was so blinded by my role as “corrector and authority “ I dropped the ball when it came to building my children up. Now I just want my dad and step mom to hear me out and acknowledge the affect they had on my identity but they refuse. Knowing how that opens the door for healing, I do all I can to right that wrong to my kids. They are young adults now but I build them up like I should have done from the start, wishing I could go back and start over. But recognizing the generational dysfunction, I believe my kids will break the chain when they have kids! I thank you for sharing this with me!

[@ritahemmerly4224]

We can all do better by our children,Do our own healing before they have to heal from having us as parents!!!

[@mudchat4486]

so wonderful you being aware and changing things.. now we have tools. re-parent you. honor you and give yourself grace as you keep un-learning and learning anew. God bless.

[@user-ns9zc5wx6i]

Gosh, I am sorry for your pain growing up. I can't imagine going thru what you went thru. 🙏🙏

[@deborahrainabotvinik3894]

😢

[@wheresarnie1]

Wow, sir. You elucidate these dynamics so clearly. Please keep speaking about this. It's time something is said (truthfully and in a tactful manner) about emotionally immature parents and their parasitic/incestuous feeding off of their children. This is one of the main reasons why generational trauma just continues - no accountability and selfishness on the part of the parents. Many parents simply expect 'respect' or 'gratefulness' from their kids for simply providing what the law (human and divine) requires of them for voluntarily bringing children into this world. (That's your innate responsibility as a parent - to take care of your children and show them how to make it in the world - expecting something in return is sick and twisted).

[@penyarol83]

Very very well said.

[@konstantinrebrov675]

My father is one of the wisest men whom I know, a true sage. And he has dedicated his life for me. And I am extremely blessed, to have such a supporting father. He is in fact probably the only thing that ties me to the material world.

[@Lalallalu]

I am sure you realise by now (even just be listening to this sermon and reading some of the comments) how rare and lucky your childhood has been in that respect. You have a wonderful legacy from your dad, go sow the seeds everywhere and spread the blessings. 🙏❤️

[@projectacuhope]

Parents sometimes make mistakes. Honor is not the same as obey. I love my parents dearly, they are not perfect though and neither am I. A wonderful lecture.

[@DOmni-gb2lj]

Yours is the best comment, thank you.

[@suneethamay3615]

Seems so desperate to become a decent and honourable of parent. But like an express train You dropped out unexpected way Train had reached it's destination almost. No longer a child. Isn't that too late to become A parent again? I am just looking for my son a decent girl with morals as good human beings as his girlfriend. Who could give a birth to good cultural a baby or good citizen in order to creating world with civilized people not a as monster as you.

[@JackVox]

Rabbi Taub's audiences seem to rarely laugh at his jokes but the Akedah joke is hillarious, his addition of humor keeps the flow and insightlful lectures very interesting.

[@SoulWords]

I am willing to bomb with the live audience to amuse the online audience 😊

[@cdcdogs4961]

I’m not Jewish, but I absolutely love your sermons! I really appreciate the wisdom and truth shared, thank you. 🙏🏼🥰 BTW, I’m the black sheep of my Mormon family.🥴😁

[@smustipher]

Give praise to The Most High for sharing truth and wisdom through reliable and trustworthy teachers of the living Word!

[@caterinabonadiooconnor9982]

❤❤❤

[@redlion6505]

This has been extremely healing for me as a child of gaslighting narcissist criminal parents, and eye opening for me to ensure I am not doing the same to those who have come to me for spiritual guidance. Thank you sir and Elohim bless the work of your hands. Yeshua is King.

[@dannylo5875]

Makes total sense. Makes me upset why I feel like I was setup to fail from failed parenting actions.

[@ritahemmerly4224]

It's not cute,not pretty, when this parent is your94 yr old mother! This messes with your head so bad it makes you crazy trying to figure the whole mess out. When you are the last child to abandon them for your own sanity. Honor your parent do it from a distance to protect yourself.Their NEEDS are more than you can deliver and they see it as your problem.

[@SoulWords]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. Your story is a primary example of why I’m trying to get parents to understand what healthy parenting looks like.

[@maralfniqle5092]

Exactly or the 95 year old mother in-law😢

[@ShiyghanNyuysiysi]

You can't abandon your parents because of old age it's a righteous thing to take care of your parents at old age and a huge blessing

[@ritahemmerly4224]

Go back and listen to the worst kind of abuse and emotional incest then and only then can you come to me and apologize. Until then I will not accept guilt manipulation done by a stranger!!@@ShiyghanNyuysiysi

[@alexandraedwards7315]

@@ShiyghanNyuysiysiI agree and I wish all people to understand this, but I think she’s saying there’s been a lifetime of psychological strain that has burdened them, causing her siblings to abandon the source, their mother, and she is all that’s left to honor her mother in spite of herself. And this is the warning he gives us… the sad state we may encounter when we impose upon our children in ways that are not appropriate. If only they could all be arguing over who “gets” to take care of their parent(s). Ahh a perfect world.

[@followthewayTRUTHlife]

Thank you for your teachings because the truth is not taught and we are living in confusion.

[@Keturah53]

"When he saw himself as his father saw him ". Wow! There are so many golden nuggets in this message. Todah. If the child is expected to meet the emotional needs of the parent, wouldn't that be emotional incest?

[@Keturah53]

You answered this after I wrote it, so, thank you for confirming it. The father of my child was an abusive person, and after we separated, my child (then about 4 yrs old) would return home from his weekend visits full of rage and anger. I asked the Most High what was going on, and He told me that the child was suffering from emotional incest. Today, that child is 33, and still bears the scars. :(

[@user-kr5dg2sp9c]

❤thank you ! Got a lot of repentance and change to do ! Lord have mercy on me as a mother .😞

[@doreenlane2370]

Children are so precious and gift from God. I'm grateful for my children.

[@caroleolivette8143]

Thank you so much for your teaching! If only every parent could hear this, many families would be healed!

[@Lalallalu]

Share it widely, then 😉🙏

[@m.c.bouterse3957]

As a parent you lay the foundation in a childs life. The family is the cornerstone of sociëty.

[@BetrayerSlayerMusic]

Im my mothers love child. 1/11/74. Same as her fathers, 1/11/18, he turned 56 the day I was born the first time. My Mother was 17. About to turn 18(1956.) I had a BEAUTIFUL childhood. Still hard. Hardworkers. Im 49. My Mother remarried but divorced again. She had three boys. Shes hard, but I still think she did her best. Tricky times. I forgive you, Mom. I hope you can too to ME. I KNOW i'm HORRIBLY flawed. espcially my spelling. Her parents where my salvation, just the most WONDERFUL ppl. Grandpa was a Mason. I DO have new questions. I DO love my family. God renewed me & SOOOOO thankful for these times often today. Thanks for reading.

[@mudchat4486]

Wow. Thank you for posting. So much in this for me, synchronicity. You are doing so well. Be so proud of yourself. You are only flawed because you are human. Give yourself grace. and realize you came here to be you. and how authentic. wonderful . I feel it. thank you. God bless you.

[@melindawolfUS]

I wish I could give this video a thousand thumbs up! You're a wise man who speaks with HEART. Thank you for your tremendous strength and tenderness

[@jodybryant1752]

A profoundly important message and delivery. I have prayed for many years, to understand my souls purpose. My responsibility and clarity of living Close to gods directive. While I struggle with a parent of golden ++ years, my struggle of her, not wanting that moment to be compassionate. It helped me to understand my role, as a parent to my daughter. How I too was being selfish, controlling and abusing her on a emotional level. I realize that I was too using her as a tool for my emotions. Spirit has brought me to you, This video; The same soul , His answers I have prayed for years to know thy self. To live unconditionally. I know where my responsibility lies in the eyes of our Lord. Thank you with grace and love for the Lord has given me truths, Much needed for over 60+ years. I honor the glory of the Soul, as a parent , and the directive of Gods will. Thank you 🙏🏼

[@421sap]

B''H, Amen. Thank You Hashem so much for saving me from my parents, in Moshiach Ben David Name Amen.

[@ginaiosef]

Thank you for this great video! I already wrote about this experience, and it might be of some use: I spent some years in Italy, I am from Romania, and I heard more than once from the people I worked for or lived with, not so intimate relationship, that my parents must be very proud of me for the way I was brought up. I am a scapegoated child, and my parents were never proud of me, to say the least. I used to cry when I was by myself , thinking, "If you only knew." It down on my then that this must be what honouring your parents must have been meant. I believe we are honouring ourselves in the end. Thank you gratefully, Rabi, for your videos and the effort you put into making them. ❤

[@Ruey-pv7jx]

❤

[@bookbeing]

🫂😿💙 I'm so sorry for your pain. May Love peace be with you. 🦋Blessings, another scapegoat.

[@ritahemmerly4224]

I wonder if we should now be calling ourselves escaped goats Love and blessings@@bookbeing

[@caterinabonadiooconnor9982]

❤❤❤

[@teresaskinner5401]

Reality in religion I didn't think existed. Some Jewish people that follow this path are very rewarded blessed and lucky❤

[@laraoneal7284]

Incest doesn’t have to be physical. There are many types of emotional and psychological incest. Learned this from much research.

[@SuperAct217]

You WILL have a teen following!!! You would relate well... Keep spreading the light y'all!!

[@michaelelford411]

I found God when I became a single dad and started thinking as a giver rather than a selfish taker I grew up and sore the Devine in my children rather than bullshite wants and selfish needs...

[@dannydeboer8821]

Thanks Rabbi, I teared up in the end when you spoke about loving the child for it's essence and not for what it can later do for you. I always wanted this in my childhood and teenage years. I went through emotional incest, abuse and I was told that I am "the crazy weirdo" which, unfortunately, stuck with me like a stain you cannot get rid off. But when I heard you speaking about loving the essence, I was released... And tears as well... I wasn't the "weirdo", I realize I was a normal child with child-needs I feel finally validated I was the normal one Though there's still much healing to be done, this contributed much to it Thank you sincerely

[@SoulWords]

I’m so grateful you had this moment of healing. Thank you for sharing this.

[@jordankashuba3467]

I love all my "U Tube mentors". Im a taoist , married a Christian,best friend is Muslim, the teachings the Torah have enriched my life tremendously. I feel that being open to diverse ideas and people affords one to adopt what works best for themselves personally.

[@DanMorgan-bh5fv]

Praise Adonai that I no longer fear these devilish spirits.

[@DinuSirbu]

I come from a broken family, being 34 and still having some issues to solve (issues which have affected me since my childhood) thank you very much for spending the time to share Torah knowledge regarding these complicated issues ❤

[@brickellvoss7739]

My mother stated multiple times in my childhood the only reason she had kids was so that someone would love her.

[@barbarastrojnowski5036]

Thank you very much. This is the best explanation on what parenthood is, I ever heard. I'm a mother and grandmother, and I will definitely take these teachings to heart and implement. Thanks again.

[@barbarastrojnowski5036]

Little explanation; I grew up in a Catholic family, the youngest child of seven. I was praying for guidance so my family could be different than the one I grew up in. I couldn't find anyone who would explain it to me without putting even more guilt on me. Then your teaching pops on my screen. I know I have a lot to learn, but at least I know that God pointed me in your direction.

[@kimberlyforrest3676]

I honored my parents... I had 2 parent-induced "miscarriages", and was forced to place my half-sister-daughter up for adoption for doing so to protect her from having to "honor" her father-grandfather.

[@smallbeginning2]

That's a terrible abuse of their power. I'm sorry.

[@kimberlyforrest3676]

@smallbeginning2 Agreed. By the time I was 12 years old, I knew I could turn him in. What kept me from doing so was my mother's health condition. She was gravely ill and needed extensive medical care. My step-dad told me that her life was in my hands. My compliance or defiance was directly related to her well-being. So, when faced with this, I told God that I would be my mother's sacrifice, if that is what kept her alive. In that moment, I agreed to become this man's concubine, out of honor for my mother. Love knows no boundaries. I would do it again if I had to! That evil being never gained access to what he desired most. He claimed my body, but he was never able to take me.

[@alexandraedwards7315]

Whoa… this story. It’s mind boggling… heartbreaking. Of course you loved your mother, at 12 my mother was everything. Oh boy is life unfair, I’m tripping over this. I’m an adult and I can’t even think myself out of that situation right now, as I try to imagine myself in your circumstance. So glad you saved your daughter from the inevitable. From the pain and confusion you yourself endured. How did you… do you… cope? Just when I was feeling sorry for myself.., I read your comment. And bam! That put things in perspective. So in a way, thank you for sharing, I guess? But more importantly… I’m sorry that happened to you and I really hope you’re okay and have found happiness in spite of everything.

[@kimberlyforrest3676]

@alexandraedwards7315 The only way I survived was to find a point of gratefulness. I was grateful that my mother and I had shelter, food, and medical care. I understood that I was and am a spirit on a human journey. I recognized this man wanted to possess my soul, not my body. No matter how often he beat me, he dominated me, or he claimed me, he never possessed me. I made my decision motivated by unconditional love. I do not regret my past, nor do I hate the man. If I allowed pain, regret, or hate to reside within me, then this man would have possessed my true self. That inner being who guides me, who comforts me, and who strengthens me, would have become someone who I do not want to be. In my darkest and weakest hours, I placed my spirit in my Lord's hands. I cried, Jehovah Nissi, you are my Banner, you are my Mighty Warrior, and you are my Victor. Whom shall I fear? I asked Jehovah Shalom to bring me peace, to comfort me. When my soul was empty, I opened my hands to El Shaddai, the one who poured forth love to nourish me. I was never alone for residing in me was the True Essence of Elohim! Every experience has strengthened and enhanced my life. The hardship and trials molded me and shaped me to be who I am. Blessings! Kimberly D. Forrest

[@Lalallalu]

❤️❤️❤️

[@LillianGreenHiLilly]

This is so true. I have had to return to thank you for such a profound and meaningful lesson. I see even more clearly now my own mistakes as a parent. No one can deny the wisdom love and truth behind this message. With love and shalom from a Christian viewer

[@pamb8797]

I have listened to several of your messages for example this one and the one about family scapegoat to cycle breaker. Both have much spiritual impact on me. Your message today about honoring our children for being a soul, a precious soul, is valuable and life enriching. I thank our Creator God for you sharing your valuable wisdom so that children are treasured rather than used and abused.

[@emilyashley4820]

Thank you for this discussion. It is eye opening. I remember reading "The Chosen" by Chaim Potok and there were a lot of problems going on, but the Father told his son to not worry and to focus on his school work( the Son's school work). Suggestion: A talk on how to cope with slander would be beneficial for many people. Peace.

[@doricetimko5403]

Yes. Please address slander

[@iamahorsenut7541]

How many parents are there out there that have no idea how to be a parent. Maybe every parent to be needs to attend classes on how to be a caring respectful parent. Too many children growing up with trauma due to unhealthy parenting. These cycles need to stop. Thank you Rabbi.

[@melindawolfUS]

Thank you. This was healing to hear acknowledged. I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and I love hearing from my Jewish brothers because you have a more accurate old testament. I believe it has retained some beautiful simple truths that Christianity is missing. Thank you for sharing these valuable thoughts, in English, with us gentiles. I'm deeply grateful 🙏

[@truthseeker3773]

Unfortunately Joseph Smith changed who Jesus is in the Bible. NEVER said Jesus and Satan were brothers. And never never did Jesus say you are going to become a God. Joseph Smith book of Abraham is a lie. It's been proven a made up story. Satan wants to cloud your mind with such lies from Joseph S He was visited by angel of light. His family's history of the occult opened him up to demonic visions. I'm happy you see truth in teachings here

[@melindawolfUS]

And yes, ideally parenting is modeling the generosity God himself gives us. Forgiveness and patience as well as boundaries and guidance. Not compelling your child to do good, but teaching them (loving them unconditionally) the right way so that in their freedom they won't WANT to live in sin. Beautiful, beautiful truths

[@debifambro1039]

Thank you Rabbi. Great teaching ❤❤❤ I love the lesson with Joseph seeing his father. My father died when I was twelve and left with a narcissistic mother. My father in my memory gave a sense of self.

[@trevkam]

Good Lord this is such a transformative teaching. Without a doubt, the most important for dysfunctional families. Thank you.

[@Lalallalu]

💯

[@user-ki7yb8vw4e]

My childhood was a living hell, yet as a child that just wanted to be loved I would do anything to make my mother happy. It never worked. Not in childhood and not as an adult. I finally quit caring when her treatment continued onto my children. I then just separated from my family. Afterwards my children thanked me and shared things she did to them too (they never told me because they didn't want to hurt me),and my heart ached. that they sere treated so badly.

[@Cdoming471]

I'm going to gift this video to my parents.

[@rioourpuprioourpup9535]

Argh!!!! My parents went through a horrible divorce , I lost my father whom remarried and had more kids, leaving me to feel worthless and left behind with a bitter mom whom to this day(35years later) still gets angry when I have a relationship with my dad &family. I see these scares has lead me to use my own daughters as “sounding boards” for my family’s continued craziness!!! Thank you!!!! This hit me very hard!! Wow! Thank you!!!!

[@catherinepeter5231]

I watched birds so many times, and the beauty of it is that they dont need to have desires to exist so do trees.

[@leahwhatley1999]

Thank you once again. I’m so glad that I stumbled onto your channel. This is my second video. The other was about the unique relationship one has with Gd as a result of narcissistic abuse. Because of that dynamic, I have struggled to understand the Biblical command of honoring your parents. It has felt like a massive mountain to climb, especially where my mother is concerned. Many times I have found myself not knowing how to brindle that gap at all, especially with what she has done in the wake of the loss of my father. In recent time, I have come to the conclusion, the only way that I can possibly honor her (she has completely cut off all contact with me) is to live my life to the very best of my ability, and to make a positive impact on the world around me. I have always gravitated toward public service, and altruistic volunteerism. So, I feel that in this way, letting “my Light shine” I am honoring her…in spite of her attempts to crush me for what ever reason. I have struggled with the concept of even speaking about what she has done to me, but I can’t seem to escape people asking me how she’s doing. I have carried the guilt of not knowing how to answer, and then the scorn when I say that the relationship is estranged. Most of my life she has placed the guilt onto me, and I have carried the responsibility for the state of the relationship. I especially appreciate how you begin with a concept, and then you examine it from all possible angles. As I listen to you, you manage to cover every question and detail of exactly what I need to hear. I very much appreciate the work, and devotion you have toward Gd and His Word to us and the energy that you have put into bringing the healing that comes with it. Shalom

[@SoulWords]

Thank you so much! I’m glad you found this channel.

[@selfspiritualmastery]

Thank you for creating these videos. They are very helpful for those of us who are on this journey. Thank you.

[@seraphinaoxy]

This channel has to be one of my favorite subscriptions I’ve made in a while

[@SoulWords]

Thank you so much

[@laraoneal7284]

Yes TRUTH should be enough, not whether or not I care about you. Ty again Rabbi for validating everything I’ve believed on my own.

[@Flinshot1]

🎉 The Holy Spirit 🎉 Sends me most days to share with others moments of Jesus and our Father in heaven who grows closer though messages as this Rabi 😅 shared.

[@erpthompsonqueen9130]

Thank you. Watching from Alaska. Well done.

[@amahelli]

Thank you so much for this clarification. What a blessing for me and my relationships right now.

[@Flinshot1]

Dr. Cloud explains 🎉 the reflective familiarity that our brains use to grow in the context of Trust.

[@omegalink314]

The biggest thing that impacted the way I treat my parents is to see how good my parents treat their parents, my grandparents. So my best advice for parents is to show the children by example how you are treating your parents with respect and gratitude, and hopefully, this is how they will treat you one day.

[@beans4853]

For those who can't do that due to toxic family systems, treat your children right and with proper respect and they will return it to you wen they're grown

[@TorahisthetruthPsalms]

@@beans4853exactly.

[@ginaiosef]

​@beans4853 great answer, thank you!

[@phyllistouchstone7136]

Totally agree

[@mimibynature]

I believe this is backwards. It’s putting the responsibility on the adult children to set an example by treating the parents as the parents should have been treating the adult children. Also the grandchildren learn not to have boundaries and accept bad treatment from their parents. This is backwards. I have two teenagers and I am no contact with my family of origin. I am honest with my children about the reasons for keeping my distance and they have witnessed enough to understand. I also make it a point to give my children the safety and unconditional love that I never got. We have an amazing bond just like described in the video. My son 19 always finds the right path out of sheer love and honour for me. It’s unbelievable. I explain to my children about cycles of abuse and they watch me lean and grow into a better mother every day. Like the video says it’s the parents heart that will return to the children and then the children will return to the parents. Thanks to God who has shown me the way I will never have to return to my children and my children will never have to return to their children. 🙏🏽

[@michaelelford411]

We don't realise the damage we do to our children😿

[@gabrielakarl3859]

I struggled with this for a long time😢 during childbearing years, I solved it with setting strong boundaries

[@lvcretius]

My mother is the best actress ever and I have adhd. She refuses that I can’t help it but she should that I am pretty damn smart! She tells me that I’m not disabled I don’t have problems. I’m just a sorry ass or a drug addict and lies about me to everybody. She tells people I mistreat her and who knows what else. My children and and grandchildren have been brainwashed by a monster . They hate me for nothing. Im sixty and leaving Alabama o Montana because they are all bullies to me.stripped I can’t stay to be abused by another generation . I have also been poisoned with arsenic by my mother, and I suspect she poisoned my father who knows? nobody listens to me.

[@Ruey-pv7jx]

❤

[@wakinglife7065]

Adhd and child abuse are linked. It’s when you get stuck in freeze mode - dissociating from the abuse. I pray for your recovery

[@ginaiosef]

❤️

[@ThingsILike12]

@@wakinglife7065Agreed. Very difficult to heal.

[@penyarol83]

@@wakinglife7065hardly anyone seems to know this. Thank you for mentioning it.

[@leoniekhoury565]

Oh my God, amazing. Thank you. ❤

[@ShiyghanNyuysiysi]

I grow up seeing my mother never grateful for anything my father or anybody does for her,my father spend his whole life trying to please my mother anytime i think of my fathers struggles my heart hurts,he got hypertension very earlier and its like i have taken over him to satisfy my mother and siblings,no matter what i do for her its never enough or am a good person for a moment,she believes its my responsibility to take care of my other 6siblings who are just ungrateful like her.its break me everyday,only my father understands my pain and advice me to take care of myself first and quit trying to please her so I don't end up like him... I really pity my father he was such a loving father and a good husband. What if she speaks curses over my life if I don't always give her what she wants

[@SoulWords]

You’re breaking the cycle

[@ritahemmerly4224]

My father was the same he died 15ys ago at 88. Many strokes took a lot from him over the years but it never took his love for me. I remember asking my mother how she felt about it, Her reply was it was a blessing, God did it cause SHE had suffered enough. He tried to tell me something was wrong but didn,t know the words to describe a covert. Education has to be the answer.

[@mudchat4486]

no fear and take it all to God. Caste out the fear or perceived curse - and bless bless bless you. Pray for your protection ~ and work on affirming good sayings: I am healing. I am finding my way. God has me. I will know what to do. Good things. Do your best to let go of stress and responsibility. Just BE. and work to be calm and let go of worry. that's been put on you. so work always to release it to God. and pray for your own health and energy field,, to be clean and to make good habits... lay down the burden anywhere you can. you matter so much. break the patterns. and "they' won't like it. But God will be proud , I believe! You will set a good example by not allowing to be shaken. Cry in private, talk to God, and ask for answers. They will come.. along and along. lay down the burden anywhere you can. God bless you.

[@ShiyghanNyuysiysi]

@@mudchat4486 thank you very much.i need to screen shot this

[@anretta]

Proverbs 26, 2 Like the sparrow in her wandering, like the swallow in her flying, So the curse without cause does not come and alight [on the undeserving

[@sharlenekhatib2110]

I very much enjoyed listening to the Rabbi Very enlighten it helped me understand my place as a parent. And to also see and learned what l got from them as parents. Thank you Rabbi.

[@kristofvanhooymissen7785]

I work with Rabbi Gabriel Cousens, also a Jewish Rabbi from Israel for peace meditations. But this speech is so inspiring sir, thank you for that from my heart to yours. Shalom. Kristof Gabriel

[@user-vj4pw9qr5n]

The co-creator part aside, I appreciate your wisdom on this topic.

[@YAHAYAH_369]

Bless You, Brother. Thank You 🔯❤️‍🔥

[@danielgallegos1528]

I’m hope it’s acceptable that I, as a gentile, sit and glean and appreciate so much these talks. I bless you, the Divine truth of who you are, and all the great works you offer to the world. May the goodness of our true selves shine beyond all demarcating lines and change how we see this world and what we are capable of. Thank you, kindly.

[@SoulWords]

Yes, everyone is welcome to come learn here. I’m glad you’re here.

[@someoneanyone365]

Blessed Rabbi, I am so thankful that I stumbled upon your channel today. This is the second video I have seen of yours and you are speaking straight to my heart. To hear a respected man of God describe with such clarity the horrific experiences that so many of us have gone through in child/adulthood….it is very healing. I am a 28 year old woman who is the family scapegoat. I don’t think that my family dynamic could possibly be worse- and I know that is a huge claim. The best way I can explain the daily pain I felt for decades is to say that I grew up with a perpetually shattered heart, courtesy of my earthly parents and siblings. Last year, Jesus saved me. I likely would have ended my life if He hadn’t. PRAISE BE TO GOD. In your last video you said something that pierced me: that God IS the father of the orphaned, and that for some of us that is such a reality, that God IS our father AND MOTHER that we never had…thank you for the beautiful and profound message. I hope it’s not absurd to say that I love you already. God bless you, Rabbi!

[@Heyokasireniei468sxso]

I knew this in my heart and what I've studied. Thank you for such a validation. How do you honor people who blame you when you have cancer who spits on you hit and harm you in such a way when you're most vulnerable, people who tell you, that you are disgusting and deserve it people who would take food away from you. people who would put their child on the streets to be abused more. people who would allow the rape of their child people who reject neglect and abuse their child never giving love but always demanding obedience and servitude. people who have told you they are God people who lie on you people who would rather pay prostitutes but not their rent or for their child to go to school people who choose drugs and drinking over their child's needs people who scapegoat stone wall gaslight thank you for this

[@ginaiosef]

I believe that looking at the child they once were and imagining what they have been through, which doesn't mean we step in their shoes, we can't. Doesn't mean we are enabling whatever they do or say or stay close, better stay as far as we can. It helped me understand myself in the first place and then set them free for my own health, I don't deserve them.

[@Heyokasireniei468sxso]

@@ginaiosef i feel you and vibe wit you

[@ginaiosef]

@@Heyokasireniei468sxso thanks ❤️

[@wakinglife7065]

Know that every knee will bow and that they have to take account of their life. They are hell bound currently and all you can do is stay away from them so you’re not in danger and if they call preach to them out of the Bible and pray that their hearts soften. If they hang up on you that’s on them. But you’ve done your absolute best. Pray to the Lord that he takes over parenting you and teach you the way of forgiveness and letting go. I’m in the middle of the forgiveness part and it’s the hardest thing to do to people who are not remotely remorseful and only see themselves as being right and you being wrong. Stay close to the Word of God and I pray that you heal and recover completely and live your life of self discovery and peace

[@wakinglife7065]

Parents have responsibilities and they have a duty. If they forsake you the Lord will take over if you ask. He is the best Father and the best Mother. He loves you so much and thinks about you more than every single grain on sand on the earth. He knows every strand of hair on your head. He has a plan for you.

[@davidyerushalmi512]

Thank you so much for your inspiring, beautiful, and heartfelt shir - I cried with joy. Bless you and your work!

[@rubberbiscuit99]

Thank you for this.. P.S. I love to be around teenagers and worked in a high school for 15 years. They have a lot to teach.

[@catherinepeter5231]

The sunset does not have emotions. It is pure beauty.

[@archiehendricks6093]

I enjoyed your seriousness, and your empathy , and playful spirit.

[@taracorsi5224]

I am not Jewish but came across this Rabbi per chance. ( Not chance) But love his message. I suffered from a Narcissistic mother for forty years. Totally demasculitized I became my own mother. I hurt deeply but find healing. Thank you.

[@rakengr6188]

Thank you. Very good at many levels. Really wish this could be EFFECTIVELY taught to parents of 2- to 5-year olds AND again for those same parents when those children become 10- to 12-years old.

[@maralfniqle5092]

Thank you Rabbi, you are amazing!

[@COE33Beale]

If I were to fully honor my parents, I would be committing so many sins. It would be off the charts. To honor my parents would be to believe in lies and support. Those lies. If I were to honor my parents, I would be a racist…. I would be a hater of wealthy I would hate my teachers. And I would take out life insurance on people whose lives I am trying to slander and psychologically destroy from every angle. If I were to honor my parents….. Thanks, but no thanks. I will keep a level head and continue to do what is right think what is right and not get bogged down with issues of division and hate

[@jupiterrisingsheer-lee1984]

You are giving a refreshing good interpretation to this. Blessed be

[@macoeur1122]

I love your theory about babies and the recently deceased. I think you're totally onto something....and I love the advice that we should remember that everyone is that "spirit" or "essence" having a human experience. ..and I would add "even when/if they themselves have forgotten"

[@pmeehan_3]

My mom had always been aggressively overbearing on me. One time when I was a teenager she was haranguing me I literally had a nervous breakdown/panic attack my whole body was shaking and I was hyperventilating. She needed to be right ALL THE TIME. Btw, I'm not jewish. I was raised roman catholic. I consider myself agnostic now. Going to confession made me think the whole thing was nonsense. I was like I'm nine, what sins have I committed. I would just make stuff up like I was mean to my mom or my sister. I'm enjoying your videos.

[@victoriagoolsby6006]

Amazing thank you

[@matthewbiesen7867]

"Hone" - this is what honor means. It's also the root of "honesty" - all Sons of men are honed by truth.

[@susananastasiastavros1402]

Thank you, absolutely wonderful explanation on the command, honor your father and mother, in the scriptures.

[@teasajko2169]

God wanted me to listen explanation about scape goats from you and l am honored l see the same,that pushed me into searching my real Father in heaven,l demanded, l shouted to the sky for answers with anger,l saw Jeshua,at the time l didn't know who He was,He brought me on the stairs to the thrown to God and He gave me a star,had no idea what it all meant. From that moment all got worse...but l started to meditate and learn to hear His voice and little by little He unraveled all the lies.l was never part of any religion...l just knew from since l am aware of my existence that God is real. When l hear your voice l hear Abba,my Father God,priceless,thankyou,you don't know me but l feel you care, so l heard and this wisdom is now written in my heart,God bless you and keep you