How to FIX Filipina “TAMPO” | The Infamous Silent Treatment in the Philippines

[@justinandbabsi]

Send us your story of how you dealt with “TAMPO” 😊 We’d love to feature it on our segment SOON 🔥👌

[@SitBackandWatch.Official]

I’m a very stoic person. Tampo for me is just peace and quiet. I never wanted to create any drama which is why none of my Filipina gfs would ever last with me. She needs to understand that I came from a totally different culture than she is and needs to learn how to communicate openly.

[@AlAmbrose]

The reality is this is immature behavior. It's toxic and they're making excuses for it. What is rewarded is repeated if you reward bad behavior it's repeated and they have no incentive to change or learn other communication skills.

[@President-Elect_Cory]

Tampo is neither productive nor good communication. It doesn't just happen when the man "does something wrong", sometimes it happens only because the women "thinks" that he did something wrong... there's a big difference. And instead of communicating your feelings, you shut down and stonewall your partner. It's a destructive trait for relationships and could be why so many Filipinos leave their wives. Don't pass this along to your children, you are setting them up for failure if you do.

[@justinandbabsi]

👍

[@TheJudgeofLevelstm]

Leaving an insensitive and mentally abusive spouse is a no brainer.

[@MrJaiden23]

This is the best comment. Women are often catered to. Imaginenif men did tampo...

[@iBackBeat]

Exactly!!!!!

[@jacquestnj]

When I’m ready to talk to you. So it’s all about them giving in. You don’t reflect on how ignoring someone and going silent on them affects them. You expect them to sit around and wait until you’re ready completely disregarding what you are doing to them. I love how one-sided it is.

[@vernondavis561]

Although I can appreciate the silent treatment over an incoherent screaming rant, I cured my Filipina of this juvenile behavior. I did so by suggesting that when she is ready to engage me in an adult conversation I will be available. In the interim, I have more pressing issues to deal with.

[@justinandbabsi]

This is absolutely lovely to hear. It really shows that both of you makes the effort to better the relationship in the most respectful and secure manner. And thats how you know both truly love each other. Cheers! 😊👌🍻

[@jamesholden4571]

This is how I learned to deal with it. At first, it seemed childish, and frankly, it IS childish. The first couple of times, I would almost plead with her to talk. But then I found out that this "tampo" was a thing, and then everything changed for me. I found the best course of action was to just ignore her until she HAD to break the silence - money or something else. If I just walk away and do my own thing, it eventually wears off, and the effectiveness of this behavior is lost. I am having trouble remembering the last time it happened now - at least a couple of years. Next month it will be five years here for me.

[@jamesholden4571]

Oh, and I ask my wife how she is a lot - to me it is just showing interest in her wellbeing. Most of them time she says she is OK, but on the chance that something is NOT, since I asked in a non-confrontational way, she can respond without being defensive or "tampoing" me. Just communicate - there does not have to be this tampo dance. I am pretty good at figuring out what is wrong, but I should not always have to do it. And sometimes I really don't know.

[@jamesholden4571]

And the wife, of course, NEVER makes mistakes... LOL

[@btkindonesia137]

Interesting topic, I was with my Filipino partner for a around 6yrs and came across this with her but never really that bad, or even noticed it too much, it happened but just brushed it off or put it down to the "time of the month". From the start of our relationship I said if your mad or angry with me just don't hit me, as I've had it all before and your be out or I'll be gone. So she knew how things stood from day one, and I was very firm and clear on this. One Saturday she was out doing some property event or something, my son he's 5 at the time we headed out, we ate some ice creams and I had some beers on the front, Pasig river near the condo we lived, we walked down then noticed my partner walking up, she ignored us both, even her little boy, so we went back and she continued to blank me, following morning she was travelling for work, she left early so we was all still sleeping, she left the family home like this, which in my eyes isn't good, a sign of disrespect, i.e. she's left the problem behind, and she knew I was also travelling for work the next day. So I was due to go back to work, within day's I quit my job, jumped on a plane, had 3 weeks in Bohol to reflect (still no communication with her), then I flew to Indonesia, then started a new job and haven't seen them since, if only she talked and explained, then my son would still have he's Dad. I am in a work industry-safety oilfield that we need to solve problems, and communication and solutions are key by the minute, I can't deal with nonsense, over reacting drama people, negative thoughts, move forward. Fast forward 4yrs I am now happily married to a Catholic Indonesian women, if we argue or get mad or there's any problem, we talk, it's called being responsible and mature, not being a kid. Thanks for your channel content, enjoying the topics of discussion. K/rgds, An Englishman in Jakarta

[@justinandbabsi]

Thank you for sharing your experience and situation with your filipina previously man. That really took an unexpected turn but I understood where you were coming from at the time. We’re just saddened for your son because 2 main people in his life wasn’t able to solve a problem. These are the reasons why solidifying relationships first is crucial before having children. We’re happy you are now happy and satisfied with your current wife. Sending you both more abundance and grace and hopefully the same with your ex wife and son.

[@Methodwake]

You orphaned your son because your baby mamma tampoed you? Kind of ridiculous, don't you think?

[@jeffreyhill5137]

So what kind of man leaves his son. Not a man but a boy. Damn no respect for you

[@parabiology1014]

I had a Filipina that was tampo tampo to me for two weeks, and wouldn’t talk to me or even read my messages m. It destroyed our relationship and I found a new Filipina. She regretted it later, and begged for another chance, but it was too late. I found a Filipina that doesn’t pull that childish BS. Act tampo tampo to a Westerner at your own risk.

[@justinandbabsi]

Two weeks is too much. Did you actually try visiting her rather than texting? Texting during conflict is also not the brightest idea

[@parabiology1014]

@@justinandbabsi - it was right at the start of the pandemic, and I couldn’t physically travel to the Philippines again because the country was closed. I honestly thought she had ghosted me, and that I would never see her again. Over the first week of the tampo I sent her three messages, which she didn’t even bother to read. By the third one I told her I loved her and missed her, and that my heart was breaking, and that if I did not hear from her soon that I would be trying to move on soon if she didn’t respond. After 3 more days, I did exactly that when she still hadn’t even bothered to read it. She later apologized over and over, but it was too late by then. I had already met someone else. Despite the fact that I was absolutely devastated and heartbroken I tried to give her another chance but I told her she would now have to SHOW ME she actually cared, and she would have to compete with the other girls I had met in her absence after crying my eyes out while she was gone, thinking she had utterly abandoned me. In America, if a man hasn’t heard from a woman in two (actually in my case it was closer to three) weeks, you NEVER will hear from them again, and I had allowed myself to love her, particularly after she had already been professing her love for me. Tampo is EVIL, HURTFUL, and childish! During those two plus weeks, I had also had a serious spinal injury, but because she wouldn’t even talk to me or read my messages, she didn’t even know.

[@justinandbabsi]

@@parabiology1014 Oh wow… What a tough time for you. Well clearly she is still immature and has a lot of self development to do. Tampo as initial response is ok but after one makes effort to make her feel safe for days then theres no excuse with her behavior. Wish you healing and hope you find your match

[@GruntSpc]

That’s what I need to do to my wife. For 25 years I’ve been getting this BS from her. She even does it to my kids. They also had enough of that BS. Damn shame….. Next, divorce. Enough is enough!!!

[@TheJudgeofLevelstm]

​@@parabiology1014So glad to hear you dumped that snake.

[@LargeMouthLunkin]

The story is always about them and their emotion cycle and putting them in a "safe" place while they still act on how they feel. First, those outside of this were raised in their culture as well. It unfair to expect those outside this culture to adjust AND being the only attempting to adjust. We are always challenged to look at things their way while hang on the idea that they were only ones raised with cultural tendencies. This is not sustainable in a relationship.

[@hafiseanwar1366]

From a foreigner's perspective Tampo i svery much a weapon of mass destruction! Life is short, time is precious knowing that how much time is lost and wasted through Tampo? That is lost time you'll never get back. I've heard many Filipino woman say O it's normal for us , it's part of our culture. I the ng o on to explain well its not part of my culture. Of course in any relationship there will inevitably conflict moments and issues, the best way to deal with them is to understand you both love each other, you're both in a safe space and it is purely down to you both on how any conflict is resolved, calmly as two mature adults. You mentioned if yu had to chose between a Filipina who is nagging and aggressive over Tampo, personally why would you chose either one? You say this Tampo trait is indoctrinated into from a young age, that may well be the case and for me its very sad to hear that, however, as an adult you are now in a position of choice, to chose how oyu will react to a potential Tampo situation. Subconsciously you know its is destructive to any healthy relationship so you must work on that and take responsibility to do so. During my many visits to the Philippines over the many years I have spoken to many other foerigners and Expats there about how the manage with the whole Tampo thing. Many of the foreigners told me they don't have the time, energy and patients to deal with Tampo behaviour as it effects their blood pressure negatively with much frustration too, so the forigner calls it off. There are exceptiosn of course , but the reality is most of the guys whi stick it out tend to have an unhappy home. I asked a wonderful filipina the question What are your thoughts on Tampo!? She smiled and said I was wondering when you were goign to ask me that question she said! She went on to said I learn't from a young age that TAmpo is a complete waste of time , energy and emotions. We all make mistakes, no one is perfect, and often with a foerigner things can be misunderstood or miss interpreted, it happens. If there is an issue or conflict just face it head on , discuss it together coming to a mutual undrstand/resolution. Simple!! To this day this filipina is one of my trusted souls and treasured close friend

[@justinandbabsi]

I agree with your point of view at some extent. :) If Tampo is used against you as a weapon then you chose the wrong Filipina my friend. Those foreigners you interviewed, most of the time don’t tell you the caveats. Tampo is REAL no matter how a person uses it. Just depends on the person. With that being said we’re also not saying TAMPO should be enabled. It should be talked about as respectfully as possible cos no matter what people say, its a real thing. Instead of being mad that it exists. Talk about how to manage it with your partner thats tailored around your needs and wants. If you dont want to face the music then break up and find the right person who relates to you.

[@GruntSpc]

When a man asks his wife “Filipino” what is wrong or what’s going on. It doesn’t make us stupid or disrespectful. It just means that we are sensitive to her feelings and want to know how to make it right. If I didn’t give a “sh¥t” about her. I wouldn’t ask her anything and just continue the silent treatment from my end as well. I’m not going to apologize to such a childish behavior. I’m not going to give her the upper hand, by bowing down to her “tampo” childish behavior, because she can’t accept that not everyone is perfect. 😮😮😮😮

[@Leonard369C]

I think tempo in Filipino culture is a passive aggressive way of trying to subordinate or change the behavior of someone. (as they withdrawal of attention can be very painful). And as such some people would prefer to be yelled at than ignored. If it were the case that someone needed to cool down before engaging in a conversation that would be noble, but in most cases is not the case with tampo..

[@justinandbabsi]

Depends who you date. I personally bring myself out from it with the help of my partner. If two make an effort then its solved. But really depends who you date so choose wisely. :)

[@kennethwelsby2143]

I'm still married after 35 years to my lovely Italian wife who certainly confronts me with her thoughts. And thats fine, everyone percieves actions and comments in the light they learned proper communication should follow. However we feel emotionally is relative to the tides of chemicals swaying in our brains during the heat of the moment. Yet these cerebral chemicals calm down after a short time usually. So wisdom dictates, take a break and dismiss the vanity of having hurt emotions to allow forgiveness and compassion to slowly build, further solidifying your bond as a couple. Forgiveness is the super glue to real love. Enfactuation only begins the journey, but conflict, patience and forgiveness lead to a devotion of love for each other. Real love.

[@romeobodeodo]

I dealt with tampo before I learned it's a cultural trait. I thought when I first dealt with it that it was an individual trait of my girlfriend. Now that I realize that's just the way Filipinas deal with conflict, I'd ignore it until she's ready to communicate. I'd just go on with my life and appreciate my alone time. I will not acquiesce to anyone else's manipulation. And I won't be spending time guessing what I might have done wrong. When she's ready to communicate, then we move forward.

[@MrNathan1575]

I understand that tampo isn’t going away & we should deal with it accordingly. However saying someone doesn’t love you if they don’t understand what’s wrong, is a terrible assumption. Men & women are completely different & to assume a man should know everything about you is crazy. Sure we can learn things as we go along, but there will be many cases where a woman is emotional & reacts to small things we would never see. I’m not saying we shouldn’t learn who our woman is, but many relationships are destroyed when the woman assumes we should know why she is reacting all the time. We are created differently & need to give each other grace in our relationships

[@Englishman2031]

It amazes me how it is the guy again who has a adapt to the Filipino's ways, who is the one in the relationship bringing more to the table! if it happens more than 3 times and each time you have tried to talk with her about it just walk away from the relationship I've experienced this ridiculous behaviour its pathetic and childish.

[@marciestoddard730]

What do you bring to relationships? Finances? Like low finances? Lol. Don't expect more than you give brother.

[@Englishman2031]

@@marciestoddard730 you don't make sense

[@alaskanohio]

I am currently dealing with a "Tampo fit". This wont go away in a couple hours or even an afternoon. It will be DAYS. Yes, plural as in more than one. to me it is frustrating and childish. If you are mad, say so and I will give you space. If you want to be left alone, say so. Don't get all quiet and expect me to guess what I did wrong. Its not about whos right or wrong. Its about learning what mistake not to make again. In my case. I was talking to my sibling about our very ill mother. But my Filipina tried to call me. Because I was not sitting there waiting for her to call and I was on the phone. TAMPO with a vengeance. EVEN after I explained I was talking to my sibling. It is so frustrating that I certainly have second thoughts about our whole relationship.

[@justinandbabsi]

Yeah it can be frustrating we do agree. Hopefully you guys find ways how to handle these… Take care ✌️

[@MG77740]

Really, excellent video! You covered the topic very well and provided valuable information for understanding and managing conflicts when tampo is involved. Here's my own list of tampo tips and tricks, for whatever its worth to couples that read these comments. 1. Agreed. Give space but reapproach gently after a short break. Get is resolved before a day goes by and rumination will turn the little problem into a monster. 2. Take immediate action to show the opposite behavior of what she may be angry about. Granted, you may be guessing. 3. If you are 10% at fault, apologize as soon as possible. I say 10% because one has to factor in ones own blind spots and bias. Its probably >50% if you think its 10%. 4. If this is happening a lot, you have bigger issues. It may be good to go on a love campaign. Try to up your love game. 5. Make sure you're going to church regularly and the the church is effective at getting your heart and mind working correctly. If not, you may need to change churches or do bible studies for couples, for example. 6. Don't take bitter words too seriously. Filipinas sometimes say crazy things when they are hurt. Do hear the emotions but not the crazy talk so much. 7. Don't try to solve your problems when you are addressing hers. Address her issues and then, some other day, you can address your issues when she's happy with you. 8. Try to address the hurt feelings first and then do the deeper problem solving when heads are clear. 9. Beware of the laundry list. If she's accumulating resentment, then you need to focus on point #5 and #4. Love keeps no record of wrongs. Read www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Corinthians%2013%3A4-7&version=NIV 10. If you don't think you can forgive her for words exchanged, remember that you are the spiritual leader. The buck stops at you. You're responsible for her. You didn't marry her for you but for her. Be a man, suck it up and help her out. You won't even remember the problem in a month or year if you handle it correctly. Try to remember that marriage is a Christian institution in the west. A primary purpose is to perfect our ability to love another person. That can't happen without change. Ultimately, both of you have to submit your wants to God and then, you can have peace. This has worked for us for 32 years so, good luck Fil/Am couples (and Fil/non-Fil couples).

[@justinandbabsi]

I love every point you highlighted MG 👌😊💯 Facts!

[@margieolvida1214]

Tampo refers to a range of Filipino cultural behavior in which one may withdraw affection or cheerfulness from a person who has hurt one's feelings. Because the behavior roots from Filipino culture, the term has no English equivalent, but "sulking" or "to sulk" is often considered the closest.

[@justinandbabsi]

Spot on! 👌😊 Yes its really rooted in the culture but with proper communication , and sensitivity on how to manage it then it’s not gonna escalate :) Everything can be managed with proper communication

[@nineseven420empire3]

For the 1000000000 time. Men are NOT mind readers.

[@alanbarnes3569]

Hi guys! This is a BIG topic to cover. I was married to a Filipina so I can speak from experience. First thing I would say is that filipino men suffer from doing Tampo as well as women and I do know of Filipinas that do not do Tampo. I could give you 100 examples of the trouble and stress she caused in our relationship because of this, so I won’t bore you with the details. The answer is find someone that does not feel nervous about losing her husband or who is constantly jealous even if you look at another woman because you will never get past that if you have someone that’s like that at the start, they will always tend to behave like that, even as an old woman. So the message is, start as you mean to go on and you won’t keep hitting a brick wall trying to get over it. Have a great day 😊

[@justinandbabsi]

Hi Alan, sounds like it was a tough relationship. Yeah agree with you 💯going silent for a bit to reflect is different than completely spiraling down every chance she gets You’re absolutely right. Whoever you date in the beginning will be the same in the end. Cheers to you Alan :)

[@mollyg4100]

A good thing to watch on KZbin is “A man’s brain versus woman’s brain” it helps to explain the differences between men and women.

[@justinandbabsi]

💯😁

[@MarkSmith-bd5zv]

My wife and I have been together for eight years. She will occasionally have Tampo, and if I am honest with myself, I usually know why. There was one time I didn't and I told her, look, I know that I have said or done something to upset you, but honestly I have no idea what it was and I would appreciate it if you tell me so I can decide if it's important enough to try not to do it again. After that we talked about it and everything was good. These episodes can be counted on one hand in 8 years. My wife is awesome, and I thank God for her.

[@justinandbabsi]

Beautiful story Mark. You handled this like a professional and a gentleman 👏

[@craigshrimpton5765]

One thing I noticed about watching Babsi talking is that she speaks so fluently and eloquently. Of course many filipinas do because English is their second language but it just goes to show how wrong and delusional the western passport bro haters are by say they are uneducated and can't or speak very little English. I bet these haters can't speak a second language let alone had a good grasp on their vocabulary in their own language. Justin and Babsi are a lovely couple and I understand now that it's good for the husband to take the same route and take time out to reflect about the situation instead of getting emotional in the heat of the moment.

[@justinandbabsi]

Thank you Craig for a kind message 👍

[@MrJaiden23]

This is women being immature and expecting men to deal with it, however, they cannot support if it was the other way around. This is just weak men giving in to a woman they are attracted to and letting her get away with foolishness.

[@filipinamorena]

Hi, nice to have stumbled upon your channel..my foreign partner and I are on our 4 years but I only tampo twice and he made tampo once also..lol😊

[@justinandbabsi]

Twice? That’s remarkable. Great job 👌😊 Yeah, Tampo can happen to anyone. Even the foreigners. But with proper communication, its gonna be alright. Cheers to you both 🍻

[@filipinamorena]

@babsirants yep, proper communication is key. I think 1 of the reasons why some Filipinas Resort to tampo is because they can't express their inner feelings through proper communication and some don't like nagging so they just prefer the silent treatment. For me, tampo is okay as Long as they know their limit. 😉

[@justinandbabsi]

@@filipinamorena I absolutely agree with you. Some even cry and cannot say it properly cos of too much emotions. So being kind to them is all they need. Feeling safe and secure like you said 👌😊

[@tejanoaj7582]

For me, she will either get over it, or not I'm too old and stubborn myself to play games 😂

[@justinandbabsi]

Two people being “Tampo” should be the most difficult scenario 😁, waiting for each other to make the move which never happens 😁. Anyhow, hope that everyones ups and downs are always manageable ✌️

[@nwbrian9697]

This is the worst to deal with. It's an adult silent temper tantrum. It's always triggered by the most mundane inconsequential things. Having to deal with this as a husband when your reaction or actions aren't exactly what she expects or wants at that exact point in time is very frustrating. Dealing with this right now after taking some fall pictures of the kids and she suggested a new location. I told her ok we are not in a rush and will takes pics there next. Whole evening and week ruined now. It's a very toxic trait that I never dealt with when I was dating non-filipinas.

[@toastyroach1199]

Am saving up to go to travel to the philipines hopefully this year thank you guys for the videos =)

[@justinandbabsi]

That’s absolutely wonderful! 😊 We’re so glad for you. Hope you get to travel sooner. Have a remarkable journey here in the Philippines 😊

[@francispua9803]

I love how she explains it about "Tampo" a silent treatment. I love how she explains it again. Sorry for being redundant. Thank you take care.

[@justinandbabsi]

We truly appreciate it Francis. Hope you can apply it when the day comes. Cheers! 😊👌

[@Lvbigman78]

Happy wife happy life. But when this happens and she doesn’t explain what we did wrong even if you know and love your wife. There needs to be communication both ways. So as a couple you move forward and stronger. So I agree with some of your points and also disagree with what this video was about. Wishing the best for both of you 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@justinandbabsi]

That’s right. There should definitely be communication 💯 . We hope Filipinas understand this and open up to their partners 🙏

[@charleswhite7035]

It's called immaturity.

[@pltatman1]

Without having experienced tampo, if self reflection was not sufficient for me to determine the cause, I might become indignant and withdrawn myself. Double tampo 😂 The reason I think this is because whenever tampo is openly discussed, I feel indignation build up inside me without fully understanding why--even though the tampo is happening to someone else and not me. Even though I am generally less emotional and a non-drinker, I think this would make me want to go to the bar. EDIT: I figured it out. I am an extremely respectful person. So the idea of being disrespected in such a way would be a huge turn off for me from a relationship standpoint.

[@stevew3196]

I'm with Vernon Davis on this topic. RESPECT & COMMUNICATION are key to a good relationship. If you do something that upsets another person it helps to know what you did and how it upset them. That way you can resolve the issue. I am used to communicating my feelings and intentions. I don't believe in secrets and lies because sooner or later they come back to bite you in the a$$. If you tell the truth others may not like what they hear but, to me that's better than deveiving them or making promises you cannot or have no itnention of keeping. When you are in a relationship you make some sacrifices. For example a single guy may go out a couple of times a week with buddies maybe have weekends away. The deal with a relationship is you realise you are better off with your partner than you are being single.

[@justinandbabsi]

On point Steve. Proper honest communication is definitely the key. So many people though prefer to skip it and put uncomfortable things under the rug.

[@miker3875]

It's worth bringing up in the dating phase. As the male expat, explain that you WANT to understand what's going on, and it will be a significant help to the relationship for you BOTH if she doesn't bottle something up. I think most women (regardless of culture) want to talk about how they feel. While dating, demonstrate consistently you want to know what's going on. If there is Tampo in initially, ride it out, but remember to talk about it when it's concluded. How much you were frustrated by the silence, and how much easier it was to resolve the conflict once it was out in the open. And set the example by bringing up issues that trouble you. Keep short accounts fellas, good advice for any culture. Final advice, make Christ the center of your marriage and pray together. It's hard to pray with someone you are giving silent treatment to. Lead your wife, lead your family. She WANTS you to be the man.

[@tilapiadave3234]

Is simple ,, she plays Tampo , I play drink at nearest girly bar ,, she stops and I stop.

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@josephreynolds7505]

Farmers psychologist here. I think all women are fighters. They feel if they can get you fired up, that you still care. If it's been a while, I will be the first to pick a fight. Just to show I care. A silent treatment to me would just be a vacation. This is just some of the spice of life. Don't be afraid. Unless she comes at you with a butcher knife. ❤❤❤

[@Mark-rw3kw]

Sounds like she expects a man to not only fix what they have done wrong, but also the man must know what he did wrong even if she doesn't tell him.

[@justinandbabsi]

With time it gets easier 😉

[@rolandmueller7218]

My Filipina girlfriend had Tampo a couple of days after we met in Manila. I offered to get her a cup of coffee at the convenience store across the street. She responded yes. I bought a cup of coffee and asked the male cashier for sugar. He said they were out sugar. So I brought her the coffee without sugar and explained the situation. She said she never had coffee without sugar and got quiet for a little bit. Then she said “let’s go back to the store”. So we walked back without speaking and stood in line. She asked a female cashier for sugar. The cashier said “sure, just a moment while I get you some”. I was thinking, that is not what the other cashier told me. When she came back she said “sorry, we have run out of sugar”. Then my girlfriend looked at me and said “you were right”. Then we went back to the room with me and asked “did you notice I was mad at you?” I said “I noticed you were upset. Not until you said we needed to go back to the store”. She told me she was having tampo for a little while until she realized I was right. In a way, I like Tampo because it is a peaceful way of dealing with conflict and allows time for thought instead of lashing out and regretting it later.

[@justinandbabsi]

That’s actually quite cute 😊 Glad you gave her the time to reflect without prejudice. Perhaps thats why she snapped out of it quickly cos you went with the motions with her. Lovely. Cheers 🍻 😊

[@MG77740]

Ironic, since tampo literally means "no sugar".

[@jamesc1418]

When she gives you tempo ask her what's wrong and if she says everything is ok then leave her alone. As long as she doesn't yell or scream at me I'm all good. Do all the tempo you want ladies. I'm ok with it. Remember that you are not raising a child. If she's being immature it's always ok to leave.

[@asandmyfil-amhubby9666]

Yes your right usually a guy will say to his girlfriend or partner "Hey what's the matter what's wrong or are you ok pretendindg innocent but if you know your women this guy is verry noticeable about feeling's but most boy's or men act like o' a your ok ah your fine act like macho about the issue but for the right approach is to approach her w/ comfort her and w/ trust and alway's think she's first is not about you it;s about her if you know what i mean in order for her to get back into her owned mood or happy normal mood Thank you for your time and thank you for sharing a must need content to unveil

[@justinandbabsi]

That’s right Anhar. Some issues are easily spotted and could be fixed by the Man in charge 👍

[@rabidfarmer9765]

If she gives you the cold treatment is the time to get a fresher one. I will NOT tolerate or entertain that for a second. One girl got jealous and threw an attitude and I dumped her on the spot. I got another a lot more prettier. I don't have time for that sillines. They throw these tantrums and cold treatments and I just cannot stand it. The women in my family do not do such silly things.

[@justinandbabsi]

No one is forcing you. Replace if you want

[@rabidfarmer9765]

@@justinandbabsi I do and often. REtirement should not be spent on someone moping and sulking all the time when things do not go their way. That time is better spent at the beach w/ happy people around.

[@guiseppe_34h15]

@@rabidfarmer9765 Funny cos the only moping and sulking I see here is coming from you. LOL What a dummy

[@DavidVargas-qu8mf]

The men in the rest of the world outside of the Philippines just tell their girlfriends or wives hey I'm not going to tolerate your dysfunctional emotional damage get over it like in half an hour or pack your bags. By the way if women have this emotional problem where they give in to their childish feelings then maybe they shouldn't get in relationships, maybe they should seek out some kind of therapy before they bring their silly hurt feelings that control them like a new app

[@johnmfl61]

How to fix: When she comes off tampo, you extend it five times as long right back at her.

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@AngelicaCaballero-b4o]

Lovely relationship ❤️

[@justinandbabsi]

Thank you 🙏

[@s3renity274]

I wish I knew this before. I dumped my Filipina gf because of this stupid “cultural norm”

[@justinandbabsi]

😲

[@ernestjoseph6219]

How do you express tampo at the Job? Can we relate Tampo effect to fight and flight situation? Is there is love between a couple, is not better to face the reality with respect and dignity instead of isolation and anger, Is true everyone needs private space , but it has to be done in relation to the time spent in that space, try prayer, meditation and forgiveness. What is your take on that?

[@justinandbabsi]

Hi Ernest, we saw your email. Thanks for reaching us. :) Tampo should never be brought to work. As much as possible be professional in a professional environment. Don’t treat people at work like how you treat relationships cos its not the same. Keep it professional. Tampo is definitely a fight or flight response in your nervous system. Filipinas tend to flight than to fight cos at home, that’s how it has alway been. Both responses exist so we should not overlook one from the other and deal with it It’s definitely better to face the music when two people have calmed down. And that takes a bit of isolation which people need. Yes, when you isolate, feed yourself with good thoughts to calm down. Be productive in these times and not make your bad thoughts worse. Meditate, consume funny contents, play music. Calm down before facing each other

[@stevenwistort9903]

She has tampo, give her a shot of lemon, ginger, and peppermint drink. While she's drinking, ahh, I can enjoy the peace and quiet, for a moment at least.

[@justinandbabsi]

I like your style Steven 😎💯👍 Both definitely appreciates it for sure. Great job 👏

[@desmondfrost1763]

Desmond here from new zealands i have travel the world do you belive in the guy giving her flowers or ch ocolates when the lady gives you the silent treatment or do you belive in seating the lady down and talking it out calmly yes i agree with the lady the guys do not get emotionly as the lady yes i totally agree qith the lady talking is important

[@justinandbabsi]

That’s right Desmond, better to talk it it out calmly 👍

[@MrWaterbugdesign]

I don't see how this is my problem. Why would it be up to me to fix a Filipina's bad behavior. That's up to her. If she doesn't want to talk that's her choice. If it messes up my life then OK, that becomes my problem. She gets the boot then. I'm fine working with a Filipina to make her life more fun, but it's not on me to force her to explain. Tampo is manipulation. The "silent treatment" has been used by women to manipulate weak men forever. If a man allows it then that's on him. No different than other manipulative behavior such as yelling, throwing things, name calling, etc... Why put up with that crap? Huge number of simps heading to PH.

[@justinandbabsi]

You’re absolutely right. If you cant deal with it then don’t. Takes genuine love for a woman to go through the motion. Whatever floats your boat buddy.

[@guiseppe_34h15]

You sound like a sissy 😂😂😂 Be a man and lead.

[@charlsebright4528]

Don’t act like you have a million hot chicks lining up for you dweeb…

[@MG77740]

If we are hurting their feelings and we love them, then we care. That's the only way their problem becomes our problem. For the rare case that its just 100% their issue, then we have an opportunity to help them past that. Granted, maybe its not a good match, but if we have made a commitment, we've signed up for this. Its time to be a man.

[@stuartcraigan7287]

They're all crazy 😅😂😂

[@oliviajeanlove8956]

Who wouldn’t go crazy dating a bloke like you. I’d go mental tbh. 😂🥴

[@justinandbabsi]

@@oliviajeanlove8956 🤣🤣🤣 goodness

[@MG77740]

Yes, but when a person points a finger there's always three pointing back.

[@paulatteberry3165]

How did you two meet?

[@justinandbabsi]

We made a whole video about it with the topic name you asked 👍

[@dacritter8397]

Just do the "pull my finger" trick! works every time! You're welcome! 😛

[@justinandbabsi]

Haha 😆 definitely 💯

[@iBackBeat]

What is that?

[@Sagittarius88240]

Tampo can be cured by lambing, kisses and loving2x cause filipina is marupok naman so in just a second it's already back to normal😊😊

[@justinandbabsi]

So true! 👌😊 Problem solved

[@carey8250]

Bangkok, is $100 plane fare, and 3 hours away.

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@rabidfarmer9765]

Them women there do that silly thing coz they think they are important. They are not that important to me when there are dozens waiting in line. LOL>

[@justinandbabsi]

Whatever floats your boat

[@rabidfarmer9765]

@@justinandbabsi Men always make the mistake that there is only one woman for them. It is like a buffet line there - so many. And many get taken for a ride coz they are too busy staring at the young pair of legs. Dirty old men -as the saying goes. lol.

[@guiseppe_34h15]

@@rabidfarmer9765 Well exactly why you’re here ranting like a miserable hog who can’t bag a decent woman 🥴

[@guiseppe_34h15]

@@justinandbabsi His boat is definitely full of crabs and herpes 😂

[@MG77740]

You might be in the wrong line.

[@MichaelGroenendijk]

Filipina gets 404 error. Needs a restart with defragmentation.

[@solidbanjobanjo9367]

This is my new fav channel

[@justinandbabsi]

Much appreciated 🙏

[@hutch876]

I just ignore it. Makes my day better sometimes. Hahahaha

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@alanjones7878]

Just stop your jealously then no tampo then nice life simple

[@Warf_459]

I like tampo. I enjoy the quiet.

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@darrellbarnes2096]

The same guys in the comments who say Tampo is immaturity are the same guys who hate when women nagged them in America. Which one do you want?😉

[@justinandbabsi]

😁

[@michaelfirestone7440]

Your girlfriend is so pleasant to look at ♥

[@justinandbabsi]

Thanks Michael. My wife is definitely a sight for sore eyes 🙏

[@TerryKoss]

Sounds like a woman in America

[@justinandbabsi]

Well nothing wrong with that. Im sure there are great women in America. They are just quiet

[@TheDoughGetta]

Wooing sounds a lot like simping

[@mariaccanoy3847]

"Tampo" needs only "Lambing'🤣..I know some think childish but not really at all..talk to your filipina partner about it when both of you are in good mode.

[@justinandbabsi]

I agree with you 💯💯😊👌 Lambing or wooing is the solution. Not anger, not frustration, just understanding and a little effort. If you love someone, this wouldn’t be a problem :)

[@agostonbenedek1898]

Simple: 1st tampoo tell her is not acceptable for you, second time kick her out. Simple

[@justinandbabsi]

I agree. If she’s not worth it then why even bother

[@MG77740]

Yeh, you need some work before you head out on this venture.

[@Abelius]

Some calibration is in order, man. Having zero tolerance for something so lame as tampo doesn't show you're a high value man. It only shows you don't know how to deal with women.

[@francistansecoDOTcom]

You should be proclaimed persona non grata and should never set foot in the Philippines.

[@btkindonesia137]

I did lol