How to Read Body Language to Get What You Want: 6 Simple Psychological Tricks to Be More Confident

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Do you want to know how to talk to anyone with ease and confidence?
In this episode, you will learn science-backed psychological tricks to be more successful, charismatic, and influential today.
Vanessa Van Edwards is the founder of The Science of People (@ScienceOfPeople), a behavior lab that studies high achievers and the science of confidence and body language.
Her research proves that anyone can learn these practical skills and become a more successful person by using the same simple habits that almost every high achiever has.
Whether you want to be a better leader, land your dream job, achieve big goals, or align your life with what you want, this is the episode for you.
Registration for Mel's signature 6-month live coaching program, Launch with Mel Robbins, is closed.
Go to www.melrobbins.com/waitlist to jump on the waitlist for the 2025 course.
For more resources related to today’s episode, click here for the podcast episode page: www.melrobbins.com/podcasts/ep...
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I’m just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I’ll see you in the next episode.
In this episode:
00:00 Intro
04:47: The shortcuts high achievers take to communicate effectively.
05:32: The mistake most people make when working on their goals.
08:08: These relationships are the most toxic ones.
13:34: What makes some kids more popular than others will surprise you.
15:41:How to make your friendships stronger.
20:29: People who make mistakes are more likable.
24:47: How your toes give you away when you’re in a group.
26:13: Do this when you walk into a room to appear more confident.
34:23: Why your office chair should have arm rests and swivel.
39:12: Here’s why you are more likely to believe gestures than words.
42:21: How to stop using vocal fry or get someone else to stop doing it.
44:07: Use these words to set your team up for success.
49:11: What to add to your calendar every day to keep you motivated.
51:08: What are the best conversation starters?
56:53: How other people’s fear is contagious.
1:01:12: The worst place to stand in a room when you’re at a party.
1:04:53: How to figure out what you’re really good at.
1:14:41: What do highly effective people do at the end of the day?
#confidence #confident #bodylanguage
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[@stephaniematthews5088]

This is my favorite pod cast. It’s an extremely a valuable addition to life’s tool belt.

[@sarahbrooks4403]

I live alone and work remotely. I get no social interaction during the week and do more on the weekends. ANY social interaction is good for me. I like it when I take a walk and someone waves at me.

[@CRMjen]

Damn. This was a great edition! So much actionable goodness! Introvert here….reporting my actions taken as an immediate result of listening to this podcast. Thank you, thank you!!! 1) updated the names of my calendar meetings to prime my day 2) bought Vanessa’s latest book 3) took copious notes to help me be better equipped for social settings

[@memesfarmhousedesigns9254]

I love Vanessa! When I figured out that I am a recovering SA from her it was life changing!! 🙌🏼❤️

[@ScienceOfPeople]

That's amazing!!! Thank you so much!! 😍🥰🥰🥰

[@tammybradshaw7175]

I LOVE THIS PODCAST! IT'S SO REAL! LOVE YOU MEL! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!❤🎶❤️🎶

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh yas!!! I love this collab Mel! Super enjoyed it! 😍

[@alyssaeifling1271]

I heard Vanessa speak at the Global Leadership summit in 2022 to over 200K people around the world. She is even more impactful in person. She demonstrates everything she shares. Great job!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Hi Alyssa! Oh thank you for your kind words! That means a lot to me! 🥺🥰

[@nicoleolaes1373]

❤❤❤❤❤ thank you for making me feel more normal and comfortable crying and then laughing while watching this beautiful episode 😂

[@miriammandel1968]

Love this. Shes adorable and could listen to these two all day!

[@nickcobos7607]

Wow, I needed this confidence tip- for years!!!!!!!!!!

[@carlasaunders3983]

Wow! I just downloaded this episode 8 minutes in. This is so helpful!

[@brittanyneeley1996]

This is one of my favorite guests/episodes/ so helpful! Thank you! 🎉

[@desdevon3382]

Loved this episode so much!!!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Glad you did! Thank you for listening! 🙌

[@weronikakunka684]

2 my favorite motivational women speakers in one room ❤❤ love you both! Great energy and tips before networking event that I am attending in just a few hours 🎉

[@learningenglishwithclaudia]

You said the right thing @weronikakunka! 🥰 In one room! Lucky us… It was fantastic!!

[@DeepakMeena-tq4ri]

U r my motivation😅

[@ninakis9995]

I love them!!

[@DeepakMeena-tq4ri]

Me too

[@lindacknd]

wow wow wow i learned sooooo much 🌸🌸 great video and im gonna share it with people who want to level up🙏🙏

[@riyasaah]

Wonderful podcast. Now about likeability. I like people and I'm nice to everyone all the time! I do things to elevate them. but I don't get anything in return. I know love and like unconditionally but... Seriously it's jaded and one-sided now that I prefer to be alone and like myself. Idk honestly dunno. I wish I can find my kinda people maybe. Would love to hear someone's take on this matter. All in all a fab podcast. Thanks so much Mel and Vanessa❤

[@asdf7711]

It's disappointing if it isn't reciprocated. There needs to be give and take. You seem like a good person but maybe don't try so hard. If someone mistreats you, stand up for yourself: they will respect you more. Good luck!

[@akm17178]

You could be sending a subconscious message of neediness, too. People pick up on it even when we aren’t aware and it pushes them away. I have had to do a lot of work in this area because of trauma wounding causing me to seek acceptance and approval. I’ve read both her books and they are outstanding, but the tools work best when combined with deep work on our subconscious programming.

[@vickibazter3446]

Come from the heart and total authenticity.

[@riyasaah]

@@asdf7711 thankyou I'd definitely stand up for myself and I'm not a people pleaser. So these people i mentioned are my close friends and family. So yeah it sucks a bit but... Okay. I'm practising self love and trying to just let them be as Mel says. Thank you for your kind words. I hope you have a wonderful week

[@riyasaah]

@@akm17178 Dunno about that. It would be nice to be appreciated back. These are my people. My friends and family to begin with. But yeah. Maybe not. Maybe they only wanna put in meagre effort and I'm overly zealous and loving. I've been told I'm too kind/compassionate by strangers. Maybe it's just my nature now.

[@loriheadlee5094]

This has been my favorite episode I think I’ve ever seen… thank you I appreciate you so much

[@jaej34]

Thank you !! I needed this today❤

[@sugar4973]

Mel! You have helped me so much! Much love to you! Thank you for being YOU!

[@geniehappyisland7540]

Love this❤ Thank you Mel❤

[@ebbflowvinyasa8543]

Thia was an amazing podcast!! One of my favorite !! Thanks Mel!!

[@guhvideos7639]

Amazing episode loved it🔥 Thanks! 🙌🏼

[@ruthkbroadbayharbork8cente198]

❤ it is so true. Work energy is drowning me, thank you! This Pod Cast just pin point and answer the question I ask myself . What am I doing wrong?❤🙏

[@sarahg2158]

Thank you Mel! Thank you Vanessa! I admire Vanessa she is very well at explaining things. Looking back at how she was before her career change it is inspiring 💕

[@debzimon4632]

Fantastic interview!! Loved this episode!!

[@sherriewagner1737]

Great podcast. Love you both, Mel and Vanessa

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!! 😍

[@Bud_Ergon]

Mel you used perfect word for her. she is adorable❤

[@nineoneoh]

Lovely interview. Thank you so much for this one.

[@learningenglishwithclaudia]

You are amazing Mel and Vanessa! Oh my Goodness… I’m impressed with your empowerment and knowledge. Thank you girls ! ❤❤

[@theetravelhippie]

love how you hooked us with the pod snippet

[@jackiefreiberg6581]

Vanessa is powerfully, passionately and positively contagious! ✨✨✨Thank you Mel for spreading such GOOD stuff!

[@karycepa]

such a good podcast. thank you for this.

[@MysticalMatterTarot]

Fantastic interview!!!! Life changing. Love your channel Mel. Thanks for sharing all this knowledge 🖤

[@OUMABRIDAL]

Too good! Love this episode a lot. Learned a lot!

[@IYASA-pl7cj]

Thank you for this.

[@amymccoy6382]

I love these two ladies!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!!

[@maryhernandez8393]

Mel, I’m obsessed with your podcast. I love your energy ❤

[@DeepakMeena-tq4ri]

Marry don't be silly

[@user-wt3yi2nn6r]

THANK YOU

[@lisabayliss6427]

Fabulous Mel One of the best!!!! 5 pages of notes!!!! Lol Hilarious re excel sheet- SAME!!!🎉🎉 ABCD love it!!!! You guys rock Love you Mel❤

[@krs1122]

Love this episode ❤

[@eduardomusic8560]

This interview was amazing! Great video, congratulations for both women.

[@pattythomson2455]

you are right. I listened to this on the way to work today and now on you tube. So much better!!!!! Great Stuff

[@lisaturner2871]

Great information! Introvert IT geek that is now in Tech Pre-sales. Holy Guac! Thanks ladies!! 😆

[@SmilinsShrinking]

What an incredible episode!!! Can't wait to share it!!!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!!

[@cab26]

Mel I love your lists!

[@jaelsandra7017]

Love this episode, thank you Mel ❤

[@JamieTiphany]

The BEST podcast!!!!!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙏🏼♥️♥️♥️thank you!!

[@yiomarierodriguez2108]

I love it. And I would like to hear about how to embrace imperfections in order to be happier, specially when you have a physical disability.

[@kellybrooke9068]

Another great video! I learned so much thank you Mel and Vanessa!

[@creepypisces83]

Wish I'd taken notes! What an amazing guest ❤

[@drnadiaanuar]

My two idols ❤❤ Thank you Mel! I love this episode so much! 😍

[@betsybarry-gath4708]

Sooo good!!! Thanks Mel!!!

[@Kelzz08]

This was good, Thank you !

[@traceypoole9877]

Love this episode. Have just reserved one of Vanessa’s book from my library can’t wait for it to come!!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!! That's exciting! Hope you'll enjoy the book too! Share it with us via instagram! we'd love to hear from you! 😍

[@courtneysweeney7097]

Awesome segment. Keep them coming

[@jenn_jean_kent_artist]

Love her, and you!!💜💜

[@lindafano491]

I do the steeple with my hands when I am in my extended staff meetings and it feels great!

[@shannonalexander4890]

This was such a beautiful conversation. I took away an incredible amount of inspiration.

[@mrsa1453]

Two great ladies together.... can't wait to watch this....thank you in advance ❤❤❤

[@ScienceOfPeople]

You are more than welcome!!! Hope you'll enjoy the whole podcast! 😍

[@mrsa1453]

​@@ScienceOfPeopleI'm sure i will....if it's possible consider doing a podcast with Brene Brown... another great lady!

[@becm1395]

I love this!!!

[@jhendry6969]

Amazing, thank you Mel and Vanessa❤❤❤❤❤

[@DeepakMeena-tq4ri]

R u jullie rodrix

[@Kama4155]

This was really good. Made some mental notes to myself

[@asmrbee9979]

I LOVE YOU TOO MEL!!!

[@mabelsto.domingo1824]

Oh my God! I LOVE YOU BOTH. Thank you❤

[@clarybright676]

I love this podcast!!!!❤

[@julesn1917]

Thank you Mel ❤

[@andreamatriciano1311]

Amazing episode!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!!

[@rose-iu3gr]

Love this!, thanks Mel and Vannesa!!

[@ScienceOfPeople]

You're more than welcome!!! 🥰

[@sandycollins3613]

Blown away!👏👏👏

[@snehaarya8822]

Two of my favourites ❤❤❤

[@gloriamargolis581]

Thank you Mel, I enjoyed the podcast with you and Vanessa, and I don’t just like you both I also Love you Mel and Vanessa and I mean it 💋👍🏻❤️🙏🌹

[@neurologicalworms]

Wow she is brilliant and she seriously inspires me!

[@user-fr5vw7iu2q]

Mel send you hugs from Cuba, I love you! 🥰

[@ShodiyaKarimjonova-sd8ki]

Fantastic video i've ever seen

[@heathersellsnyc]

This is soo good! Thx

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!!

[@brandentietgesfg]

❤ Vanessa is wonderful 😀 Great podcast 😁

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!! 🥰

[@jinaalqudah989]

I love this.

[@tricialoza603]

Thanks!

[@uzuetayala12]

HAHAHA I rolled my eyes when she asked the question “what’s your story?” HAHAHA 🤣

[@ritcha02]

Oooo I love the body language eps!! 🎉

[@user-ho3pu3di9p]

Introverts can be very assertive. Introversion isn't shyness; it's an inward focus of energy and attention.

[@gjkmohapi7970]

This is so good. 😮😮😮

[@Tazzy_Man]

Great podcast

[@aspire2begreat938]

I LOVE HER

[@nischaymomvlogs3355]

❤at the end I think I like you both I can feel the positivity of both grateful to you ❤

[@Matisaludyenergia]

Yes ❤ I love to tell people I like them

[@love3mtb]

Her closing comments made me emotional ❤

[@create-magic-with-Lynnie]

2 amazing women together....our life toolkit ❤❤

[@jovoorheescollinsmphbsnbch6245]

Vanessa!!!! Omfg!!!! You just confirmed something I observed in patients for 20 years!!! Our mindset and world orientation is contagious!!!! I have watched this occur in patients at the hospital and nursing home 💯 and I have observed this in my spouse and my children!!! Really excellent tips today!!!! I need to figure out what my A work is....

[@Kristinnicole88]

Yes!! I have designated open and closed door hours in my office. Some of my colleagues snub their nose at the idea. However, I can get work actual work done without feeling drained!

[@Prettywings777]

Love love Vanessa 🫶💯🌞

[@ScienceOfPeople]

Oh thank you so much!!! 🥰

[@heatherl.3919]

I Love You Two, Too! ❤

[@mimozaderti9331]

So mean to listen to learn from this

[@bettysmith2142]

Great, now I’m going to be staring at toes now😂❤

[@Deanne-zd2bc]

Fav. 😊

[@lachimuishere5815]

2 of my most favorite women!!

[@radenabaker1157]

Oh. My. Gawd. This is AMAZING, and I am only 14 minutes into it!!

[@DominionAnako-bb7ry]

Motivation

[@kimberlybrink1400]

Mel, your blonde hair is gorgeous!!

[@VirusOfTheIndustryRecords]

All yeah mel I'm undefeated

[@Next_Level_You]

Love this podcast. Mell is amazing 🤩 I also recently made a video about "Practicing Body Language Basics" in my "21-Day Confidence Building Challenge" series on my channel. Learning body language for confidence is one big part of evolving yourself into a powerful human being!