How to Read Your Horse's Emotions

Join us on today’s episode of the Compassionate Cowgirl to learn...
-How to read the subtle signs that your horse is giving you before going into a spook, bolt, or buck...
-How to validate your horse’s fears, while still improving in your training
-Why horses seem unpredictable, and how to deal with it
Do you want to learn from me?
I have wrapped up my entire life’s work (and heart’s offering to the world) into my signature online course & educational system: The Horse-Human Connection Academy (HCA).
We typically open enrollment to HCA twice per year. Take a look at what HCA is all about, and sign up for the early enrollment list at this link: www.mustangmaddy.com/the-hca/
When you join the early enrollment list, you will have the opportunity to enroll in HCA several days before we open up to the public, giving you the best chance at securing your spot in the academy. You will also receive valuable trainings from me, delivered right to your inbox! You are not obligated to purchase anything when you sign up for the early enrollment list.
We look forward to welcoming you into our Herd!

[@sarahrivera3434]

I owe my mare a huge apology. She has been telling me loud and clear what makes her uncomfortable and I thought I could “cure” the behavior by sweetly ignoring her objections. We have a good bond, but I think we could develop deep and amazing bond if I stopped talking so much and listened more.

[@RoseThistleArtworks]

Awww. That sweet horse saw you getting emotional and came up to you so gently and stood with you.

[@naykeloropeza8613]

Many thanks, I been tryin to find out about "horse racing records" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you heard people talk about - Peyarper Subjective Primacy - (should be on google have a look ) ? It is an awesome exclusive guide for discovering how to get a profitable betting system minus the headache. Ive heard some pretty good things about it and my colleague got cool results with it.

[@omahhung108]

To see your level of emotion without hiding it from view is powerful for young people (especially) to witness. We’ve all been in places where we don’t KNOW what to do/ that we don’t have enough information, yet. But to be tender & gentle with ourselves & then ripple that out to our horses is a magical process. To believe & trust BEFORE we know the answer, before we experience the joy & just BE LOVE & COMPASSION in the midst of the unknown is huge -it’s no small task. Yet it’s the energy that trusts & surrenders to guidance. I love you Maddy, for bringing your brave and open heart & ideas into the light, Bless you for this most precious work! I’m so glad I “stumbled” upon these videos- this stumble is gonna help me walk in better alignment with my values. You’re Diamond 💎 in the rough!

[@equestriannewbies889]

I found myself immediately tearing up when Maddy got emotional. I had the privilege of meeting Maddy at the Western States Horse Expo back in May and just what an amazingly genuine human being this young woman is. It was such a pleasure to talk with her for a minute and watch her clinics. Incredibly interesting, enlightening, and heartwarming experience to watch.

[@heidihill8817]

Just one word - "wow." She is just the most amazing person, teacher and healer. I am in awe of her and can't wait to learn more.

[@janetsnyder3561]

My eyes see a much different story Ready for this new journey with my horse and all horses 🐎

[@user-ju3bt9io2k]

I would say that my horse is definitely a mirror of myself. I have no doubt about it.

[@viviantoward3812]

Wow i have just found you on KZbin and your post was a year back buy this has giving me so much thought i have xracehorse who hates to pass horses in the field she has a melt iam trying to get her through her anxiety but when she reacts i react after of fear how to handle her trying to control her but all iam doing id adding fuel to the fire you have given me so much to think about so thank you its so true we are a mirror to our horse looking forward to seeing more of your posts ❤🐎

[@DoItFancy]

Aww, love how Turk moves his body from just being next to you to paying attention to you and trying to gently get your attention when you start getting strong emotions. ❤️ compassion

[@gingerponyboy]

I am ready to let go of what I’ve known and believed in over the years when working and training horses and start over!

[@CInzerillo]

This was such a blessing to watch and listen to. I fight. I get angry, then I leave and simmer in my anger. What does my filly do? The exact same thing. Mirrors indeed!

[@kylareppond]

Best episode yet! Such a powerful message. I personally freeze when I am faced with difficulties in life. I am doing much better at recognizing it and working through it in a compassionate way, then I did a few years ago, and this episode really spoke to me, and helped me so much to know that I am not alone

[@MustangMaddy]

Kyla, I can so relate to you! I also tend to freeze and shut down. I am so glad this episode resonated with you

[@bethvallieres964]

Holy smokes. I'm finally watching this episode in it's entirety at the exact time I'm supposed to. I recently just asked a very good friend and therapist I used to work with about details of a past relationship, because I had an "aha!" moment last week with the mustangs I'm currently working with. I realized that I was having a really hard time allowing the horses to say no and would be really upset about it, taking it very personally. It's crystal clear to me now, especially after watching this. I was dumping all my stuff on the horse, because in my past relationship I was never allowed to say no. Once I realized that, I felt horrible, and now I see exactly how I was judging the horse. I have run the gamut of reactions in real life. I used to run, I used to fight, and when all else failed, I completely shut down. As I've been working on myself over the years, I'm slowly learning how to respond now, instead of react, but more so lately since watching this series and learning from you through the academy. Your insight and wisdom is incredible invaluable.

[@susangill-zobitz6943]

How serendipitous to find this episode after a recent experience with my horse going over threshold at bath time "quite unexpectedly". The labeling of his behavior and self-judgement of my own has been haunting me for days. It's quite enlightening to realize that my fear response has always been "fight", and even though I never respond aggressively to my horse (or so I thought), I'm now re-evaluating the episode through his perspective and resolving to work harder on myself first.

[@michelelynn8580]

I am currently in Equine Bodywork school and the instructor mentioned how much she loves and admires you. I can see why. I am new to this world and am learning so much. I am definitely more of a freeze and there is shame in this. So I can be impatient as well. I am glad I found you now and hope to educate myself more.

[@lisaconnor9655]

I think I love horses even more (if that's possible) after watching this. When your horse felt your emotions heighten he came over to you to check on you. How amazing is he! I will admit I teared up myself.

[@alexandriafinch8700]

This is SO good! I found myself applying this to working with kids too. What a transformational way of working with horses.

[@absoluteharmonydesign1955]

God I love how you teach !!!!! I been wanting to connect with the horse I ride instead of just riding her! But I just didn’t know how to read her and your very helpful! Love how you break it down and than show us with the horse !!! I would love to meet you one day !!!

[@gingerponyboy]

It is not just girls you’re making a difference with. I have been someone who has lost myself through horses and training, I didn’t know myself, I was unhappy with myself. I gave up for years and got out of horses. I have an amazing husband and family but I have always struggled with my own emotions and who I am through life. I am not a member yet but when I found your videos I instantly felt like I could become the horseman that I’ve always wanted and at one point was becoming, but had that stripped away from me through certain other training programs. I need your program not only for my horses but for myself. This episode has really resonated with me and sucked the emotions right out of me erupting to the surface this evening. Thank you! 🌸✨🩵

[@gingerponyboy]

It was tough to admit my emotions but it’s necessary.

[@user-vi8dy3wl7p]

Maddy,I thank you so much for sharing all this profound knowledge with us.I actually still find myself getting too defensive when a horse says no,but I`m aware and observing myself and being aware that it has nothing to do with the horse but is more linked to experiences I had with humans.Horses never put me into freeze but humans do sometimes,which I absolutely hate and then I find it hard to have compassion towards myself.These things go so deep and our horses help us to shine a light on all the dark spots,helping us to be more aware about ourself and others.Having watched "Taming Wild" I know it`s vital to change our perspective about a horse saying no and as soon as there are people around I find it even harder,because I`m living in Germany,were folks are in some sort of a love affair with judging....but I guess I`m gonna just pause,exhale,and continue do what I believe is best for the horse and my relationship.Thanks again Maddy for being so generous and inspiring!!!

[@JessyJohanneck]

Beautiful video. My fear tends to bring up frustration leading to anger and fight. Fandango, my saddlebred gelding has extraordinary flight reactions, in fact my fight tendencies, after 8 years of partnership studying “natural horsemanship” together finally tapped his flight reaction so greatly that he began having a trauma response to getting the halter put on, and began refusing to be haltered altogether about 7 weeks ago. MIRACULOUSLY this was almost the exact time when this series began, and thus my membership with you and my deep dive into positive reinforcement. Thank you for being our light house in the storm. I very much look forward to more online and hopefully sooner than later in person learning from you!!

[@raymondquesnel9974]

Your horse moved up to you and made physical contact with you when you began crying. He knew you were upset and comforted you. It's happened to me and is an indescribable emotional moment when your soul speaks to a horses soul.

[@subatub1]

Thankyou so very much from Australia .Getting back into horses After decades off .My son has a Drought rescue that i am learning how to have a relationship with so thankyou for the help .

[@julieringering3095]

Lol i know im a few years late on this…but a friend recommended this episode to me,and wow! So I’m on the autism spectrum.and working with my horse can be really hard,for me not her. I get angry and will cry or freeze,when things get to hard for me to handle or I understand what’s going on,or why it’s happening. My horse will always show me my frustration,by pinning her ears,bucking,kicking but she’s never offered to bite or snap at me. I am just now starting to be aware,that she is show me that I’m getting frustrated or angry,when she does these things. But after watching this,it all makes sense! That we are reacting to each ether,and that she is trying to tell me,and show me that I’m getting frustrated a d angry.and that I’m taking it out on her,and that not to ether of us! Thank you for understanding and insight! 🥰❤️

[@garyalbertson3502]

Hello again this is Laura from California 🇺🇸 I’m new to you and you are a wonderful new gift from God to me ! This whole Video on reading your Horse’s Emotion was fantastic! To top it off you took us inside your home by the cozy fire 🔥 . And you shared my Favorite Teacher’s Word’s of life ! “Love Never Fails “ 🕊Thank You Maddy my Heart was touched when you shared the Testimony as well ! Much Love back to you 💜Laura

[@laurierussell4067]

Oh...this one, this one hit the mark, HARD! I wish I had this 9 years ago when I started my Morgan boy. I now recognize (through Maddy - your wonderful insight and knowledge) that I freeze and then I fight. And yes, I got frustrated, and discouraged, and mad when I couldn't get through to Dillon. What I now recognize is he is the SAME WAY! We had some battles because he would react to something I thought he shouldn't have an issue with. I would react to him and it would get ugly. What I created was a horse who had zero confidence in me to help him get through anything. When I started to recognize that, it hurt me because I let him down. I was there when he was born and I let him down when we started our under saddle training. Fast forward to the 5 Golden Rules course and suddenly things became so much more clear for me. And every year that I work with the information I learn from You Maddy, makes my horses lives and my life so much more clear and so much more peaceful. Dillon is now 14 years old....this past fourth of July week I went trail riding with some friends. We did THREE water crossings. a few years ago getting him to do one was a fight...we did three with a simple nudge, lots of encouragement and boom he was in, he was careful, no rushing no panic...he just trusted me to help him get through the scary water. We also encountered fighter jets flying low...scared both of us to be honest, but the most he did was a 180 and stopped. So yes, this one really resonated with me big time. I thank you, Dillon Thanks you and my up and coming Promise...well she thanks you also because she gets the reward of not having to deal with the old me.

[@MustangMaddy]

Laurie, this is such a touching story! Thank you so much for sharing, for all your support, and your commitment to learning and growing. You are incredible!

[@laurierussell4067]

@@MustangMaddy Thank you.

[@janetsnyder3561]

I feel this also Very ready to start my new journey with my horse

[@sobrienzoo]

This was good! I have a 6 year-old mustang I got last year and we are moving SLOWLY toward trust together. I go into flight mode. It's been a lifetime of flight for this old woman! It's been great to work with my mustang Chica, particularly at liberty, allowing her the ability to leave; watching her closely and trying to be present and in tune with her. She has gone into fight mode with another trainer, which she has not with me. She has left me but we are working on my fine-tuning and understanding her signals. Thank you so much for this. Very insightful! They say we get the horse we need.

[@beccanels6585]

Hi Maddy, I wanted to say hat when you teared up, it hit me as well. Right now, I'm struggling internally with my mustang, Arrow. He's an amazing horse, I honestly wake up in awe that I have such an incredible horse in my life. He will let me do anything with him on the ground. But he has so much fear, he can be ridden, but he is still so reactive right now, and honestly I want a good relationship with my boy on the ground before I even try to ride him. I made a horrible mistake a couple weeks ago, he's so good with me on the ground that I figured it would do no harm if I tried out the new saddle I bought by saddling up and climbing into the saddle to see how it feels. I wasn't completely paying attention to my boy's fear that morning. I didn't take into account that I was putting a new saddle on him, one with all new rigging and a completely new feel for him. I wasn't paying attention to the fact that Arrow was feeling particularly concerned with many things that morning. My baby, Finley was nervous and scared, there had been a black bear and with two cubs in the boys feild and Finny was crying for Arrow. I ignored all this and climbed onto Arrow's back. He, of course bucked. Hard. Off I flew and I immediately felt terrible about how scared Arrow was and that I wasn't paying attention to him. I'm now torn about sending him to a trainer. I don't trust a lot of people when it comes to my horse. And all I want is to give both my boys a good life, where they don't know what it is to be bullied, or treated like a machine or mistreated in any way. Right now I have a weight in my heart that is so heavy. Because I feel like I don't deserve my two amazing horses. Thank you for opening my eyes to something that I believe my boys will benefit from so much. Myself as well. My goal is to ride Arrow in horse back archery. Not so much for the competition but for something exciting for me and my beautiful boy. When Finny is old enough I want to do the same with him as well. No bits though, rope halters or bosals. Thanks again. This is a great video that really speaks to me.

[@zainabm3216]

I think you are the best so far.. thank you for appearing on my screen.. wish you all the best.

[@davidshapiro4864]

You are BRILLIANT! I am so glad that KZbin sent me to you after searching for horse training videos, because ultimately our own psychology affects our equine friends more than any skills training we try to implement. Look forward to watching more.

[@edition-deluxe]

I love her--amazing teacher, and such a beautiful person!

[@truthofthematter9409]

This is a true horse/animal lover! She brought tears to my eyes knowing how much she truly cares and loves these gorgeous creatures.

[@Lisette777]

wow. I have never seen you before, this is the first episode I have ever watched of your youtube series, and all I can say is wow lol! How - awake, and aware you are. I have subscribed, and will watch them all! I just got my first horse a few months ago, and am just about to leave the stable where I bought her from. It would have made all the difference in the world to me if the owners of that stable were able to see my fears in an empathetic and compassionate way, and not made it seem shameful to feel worry or fear. Thanks, Maddy!

[@omahhung108]

Also to witness the beauty of reciprocity evident in the moment the horse behind her immediately gave his compassion back to Maddy when he sensed her emotional condition speaks volumes about two-way communication & connection! No words needed-it’s right there in the energy between them.

[@zenergizedequine]

So amazing! I am working with 2 feral mares with babies, learning So much from them & about myself...Thank you so much Maddy for sharing your Beautiful journey of horse & human discovery. I am moved by your vulnerability & awesome gifts! 🙏💝💕🐴

[@mcrcequestrianakamoonchase9143]

You are so Wise! Thank you for putting into words and explaining what I feel when I’m around my horses, but hadn’t put all the pieces together. Hearing you talk about this closed the loop and gave me some “ah ha” moments. I have a fairly new mare that I was told was unhandled, but she’s so defensive, I believe there’s more to the story. She came to me in foal and with a foal by her side, so out of necessity, I’ve had to revisit my ideas about training. Working with a horse that is comfortable with people and has been handled since day one is so different than working with one that is fearful of humans. It’s a switch from the mentality of maintaining leadership with a confident and assertive non-fearful horse, to creating a partnership and bond with one that would rather be left alone. I was so used to working with interactive, often overly handled to the point of pushy horses, that it was a bit of a shock at how patiently I had to work to just get in proximity without her bolting away. In theory I knew what I was supposed to do, but in reality I was baffled and discouraged at just how hard it was to do anything in the beginning. We’re making progress now and she’s had her new foal, so I’m spending time just hanging out with both of them daily. I’m so glad I found your channel as I go through this process!

[@user-ju3bt9io2k]

I am reactive! I truly hate myself for that. I definitely need more compassion for myself. I know that now thank you.❤️

[@patdavis1851]

I am so glad you showed how to do the mat. We were having trouble with that. I really, really love these episodes. Very thought provoking. I react with anger to getting hurt or scared, which is funny, because that is exactly what Grace does. :-) Since being able to read her threshold, she has not done all the aggressive stuff that scared the liver out of me. We are going forward a bit at a time. She is getting a personality and talks to me, and is starting to enjoy being praised and petted. I believe my finding your videos, saved me from giving up on Grace and from maybe getting really hurt by Grace. My husband thinks you are great too and are super talented and caring. Can't wait for your next video.

[@MustangMaddy]

Wow Pat, this is incredible! I am so grateful that these videos have been helpful for you. You are doing incredible work with Grace!

[@MF-wv9fp]

Maddy, it is a pleasure to meet you. Your path and message speaks to my human, empathetic soul and is bridging over to include the possibilities with animals capable of domestication. This is so exciting to me and can already see the many layers opening up to the possibilities of human to animal and human to human connections of sustenance. I think I'll go have a cup of tea! 💕

[@TeamWildfern]

Another great episode!! The way you differentiated between Empathy and Compassion was awesome. I hear/see a lot of trainers (dog and horses alike) that are empathetic towards their animals, but it's that compassion piece that really sets apart the trainers like you from the rest, who are really able to honor the animal in it's training journey and limit (or prevent all together) trauma from occurring in the process! You also do so much to reach out and heal the other side of the training dynamic - the humans!! Thank you for these insightful episodes!! I totally go in to freeze, and then secondary response would be flight, when I am feeling vulnerable or "over threshold". It takes a lot for me to go into fight. Don't have a horse to compare to yet, but hoping that will change tomorrow!! Going to a mustang adoption event, so keep your fingers crossed for me!! #MustangFever!!!

[@MustangMaddy]

Thank you so much! And thank you for sharing your reaction tendencies. You are not alone! AAaaahh! Yes get you a mustang! Thank you for supporting the mustangs through adoption! You are making a world of difference

[@sierratremblay7329]

Thanks so much for sharing your knowledge. I purchase a mini mule with the idea he would be this sweet little horse that would just be loving. Well this poor guy has been obviously forced into submission with his previous human because of his size and immediately goes in to fight. My first thought was just to sell him because he was "dangerous" but now I realize he is just trying to tell me something. I can't wait to continue to learn from you and put my new skills to the test.

[@DragonflyFarm]

My reactions depend on my situation. Sometimes I freeze, sometimes I explode. Neither reaction is anything I am proud of. The times I am proud of are when I can ground , stay present, and acknowledge the truth, be a witness for myself or someone else. That is when I feel true love and acceptance

[@BodyMindTherapyNZ]

Love your work sista! Been studying with Gabor Mate (Compassionate Inquiry) and dreaming of integrating his stepping stones, with equine assisted therapies. Compassion and connection is EVERYTHING.

[@sem1571]

That threshold training with mystic is amazing and exactly what I needed to see!! Thank you so much again maddy! 💕😁

[@nancyriverthunder6706]

Hi. I’ve been training a mustang foal for the past few months. First i want to say you have been so helpful in all your videos. Thanks! Also when I get scared I freeze.

[@narwhal7642]

Thanks Maddy, Just adopted a 2 y o mustang - pretty nervous and massively excited! Your videos are helping me feel a bit of awareness and acceptance.

[@MustangMaddy]

Love this!! Congrats on adopting, and thank you for supporting the mustangs. So glad I can be a small part of your journey

[@cheyenneconrardy405]

Thank you for sharing your wisdom, compassion, and love for horses! I love watching the videos. First, I came to learn about horse training then I ended up learning so much more! Now I definitely enjoy the tea time, it’s more like a therapy session for me. I freeze then flight.

[@megantowles1561]

I just came accross these videos and I gotta say, im feeling very emotional. I have been going on my own self worth journey and part of that has included horses. I recently had to say bye to my dream horse at a barn I work at that I thought I was going to be able to take home and I am heart broken. Thankfully God has blesssed me and I have two great horses and a donkey at home but I do not have the same connection with them as the other horse. I was really hit with this video because I struggle with feeling invalidated. More often than not, I think that what I am feeling is not how I should feel so I beat myself up for it. This alone has made my college life very difficult and one of the things I frequently say is that I do not have a voice. When I watched this video I realized that all of the things I struggle with are mostly due to invalidating myself, giving myself my own monsters. When the horse got taken away I told myself that I should be happy for him to be going to a new owner and a good home where he will be happy, but now it is like I can accept my actual feelings on about him going away. Thank you Mustang Maddy!

[@kaylashultz5628]

so so so so good sista!!! Encouraged by every episode. These messages are world changers!!!

[@daniellefinkable]

This is wonderful, thank you for your work !!

[@francescabianchi2902]

You‘re so amazing! Love your content and even more your energy 🌞

[@michellemastrangelo8420]

This is an amazing message!! I needed to hear about myself and my horse. Thank you!!!

[@lenoremann7171]

It is so refreshing to really hear and see how much you care and how much it means to you to help others. Thank you!

[@vangie3757]

Hi Maddie, I’m so happy I found your channel. I don’t have a horse. I’m a 38 yr old mom that just reminded myself my childhood dream. I started riding lessons 2mths ago in my first baby steps toward my dream. I’ve been begging my trainer to teach me more about horse communication, but riding techniques is all I’m getting. You are talking to my soul! I can’t wait to watch every single video and try it at the stable. I get there early and just want to connect with the horse. I want to have an experience, not just a ride. To answer your question, self awareness is another journey I’m on. I’ve completely lost myself in marriage and motherhood. I’m relearning my likes/dislikes/wants. I would freeze and shut down when adversity strikes. I love your instruction on compassion. I definitely feel guilty for taking time for myself as a mother, but am slowly seeing that it’s actually making me a better mom!

[@kristaniamcclure6456]

It’s always so good to see your smiling face! I’ve really missed it! I gain so much insight from these videos, not only about horses, but about myself. Thank you for always being so honest and raw. It’s encouraged me to open up and explore the deep places inside myself. Which gives me the ability to allow myself love and compassion. And from that, be able to give others more love and compassion. You’re doing an amazing thing, Maddy, and I am so deeply grateful. Thank you for adding so much positivity to this world and being part of the solution for healed and whole people and horses. When I’m a little scared I usually want to flee. Often I can talk myself out of fleeing or feeling the fear because it’s unreasonable or illogical, so then the fear keeps building. If I can’t deal with what’s causing the fear, I go into full blown freeze mode and shut down. I’m learning to recognize anxiety as the beginning of fear and letting myself feel it and then finding the root of the problem. Once I can identify the root, I can say, “It may not be reasonable, but it’s ok to feel it. And here’s why this makes me feel anxious and fearful, and that’s totally reasonable and makes sense.” And then I can offer myself the space to accept or reject the fear or maybe find a solution. But ‘facing’ the scary ‘object’ in my own life and giving myself permission to really take a look at what’s behind the fear has helped me avoid going into a cycle of just reacting.

[@danakleppinger3493]

Thank you for sharing Cee Cee's comments! I have learned so much from watching her videos and the patience she offered while working with Buffy. I go into freeze mode, and then as soon as possible I enter flight. Then I become upset with myself for not fighting. It's definitely a balancing act that in some situations is easier than in others. Thanks for another great video!

[@kvalletta]

Wow that was a lot of wisdom! You are amazing at breaking down all the steps we go through while with our horses. I love the way you give us human examples as well too. I’m sharing this and watching with my kids too. Thank you Maddy❤️

[@carlaantonellarosas6934]

No se hablar inglés pero tu trabajo con los pingos 🐎 es maravilloso 👏👏👏👏👌😉😍❤... desde RINCÓN DE LOS SAUCES NEUQUÉN sigo todos tus vídeos. Por KZbin

[@MustangMaddy]

[@stephsrt4]

You really made an impact for me , I’m so happy I found you I lve been trying to lunge and train and got thrown off .. have bruises but you really made me not want to give up I want to build an amazing relationship with my horse thank you for making these videos 💜

[@sandyjimerson2517]

Wow! This definitely was an eye opener and thought provoking lesson. I look forward to learning more from you. Thank you!

[@wavegirl8904]

Thank you. This really helps. I'm just going to be starting riding in January and I want to be comfortable around horses.

[@susanlumen4489]

Excellent info, Maddie, I have struggled most of my life with the freeze and dissociate reaction. Only until the last 2 years have I learned about complex PTSD and how to work through it. Horses were always my life line because I was able to communicate best with them. I have two mares now, one I raised from a baby and she is a flight reactor and the other was over trained before I got her and she shuts down till she reaches her threshold and in certain situations over reacts. She taught me to watch her for the smallest sign welcoming me into her space and we worked from there till now she is totally relaxed with me. Your videos have been a excellent education for me and I’m sure many others. I only wish I had the time and funds to be able to join in with your other material. God bless you!

[@betsysita]

I loved the message of this video, you are amazing with horses 🥰🥰🥰. You know I have this mare that is scared of big trucks and tractors, she freezes out and wants to run away, and to be honest I freeze out everytime I see a big tractor coming our way, because I know her reaction. I take her to walks to see if seeing them more frecuently will help, but nop. I was told she needed more work, because she has a lot of energy, I honestly don't know. I just felt so connected to what you said in the intro, not knowing what to do, and feeling like giving up, but somehow I want to keep going.

[@angellalee5501]

Super excited for the next episode! I have a mixed reaction between leaving and shutting down in emotionally challenging situations. The horse I am working with mainly is a Morgan gelding who has needed a lot of help getting comfortable with the horse trailer. Feels like I am 100 approximations in and still have 100 to go! I want him to be a confident traveler one day!

[@FITHERTRAINING]

Loved this!!!!

[@DonkeyListener]

Really loving these, I think this was my favorite episode though. It really opened my eyes to some things I’m dealing with. I’m definitely a freeze up type.

[@macsullivan4675]

Wow, mustang Maddy, we stumbled on to you and we love you! Thank you. Love the education part of it and Love tea time!!!!

[@outdoorsgirl52]

No words as to how deeply your insights and sharing of knowledge has resonated within me. Aching chest, tightness and release, tears. As I watched, the question I had was "How can I respond when I'm also getting triggered?", and then you answered that for me beautifully and with such love. I feel your compassion for me and I'm deeply moved. Thank you Maddy for such an example and for such clarity. How glad I am to have found you on my journey ♥️ My reaction has changed as I've worked consciously on myself. After much childhood trauma, my go-to reaction was shutdown/go within. It seemed to be the most accepted by my environment. As a young adult, I sought therapy to regain the fire I remember having when little, and as I re learned to say "no" and give eye contact, my reaction changed to flight. A decade passed and I grew stronger in my "NO!". Physically I'd still feel the invisible girth go tight around my chest (sometimes my throat) but I trained myself to tell my environment that I was uncomfortable/not ok. This became quite loud, and explosive verbally, primal in sounds rather then use of language - grunts, growls screams. I gave myself that, because I was finally standing up for my needs, even though extremely, or at least to me, that's how it seemed because others didn't respect (perhaps even see) my subtler cues of discomfort. I took up iaido to gain movement with my noises, movement with purpose of defense, protection, and meet a threat head on, assertively. This current decade, I work at relaxing the fight mode (as it has served its purpose or reawakening me to living and my right to live) and through avenues such as NVC and our beloved horses I'm reaching deeper within to pull out the wisdom and guidance we all have. Depending on my interpretation of threat, I can still react in all 3 ways, though now put conscious effort into the moment, honoring the reaction, feeling the reaction physically, and working at coming back to my balance...later I reflect, and look for the exact moment fear arose within, look at that wound and love it. Super long response to your end question, so thanks for reading :-)

[@alicelefebvre289]

I stumbled upon your video looking for tips on how to connect with my horse and correct some of his "bratty" behaviors. Little did I expect to find out about these notions of thresholds and compassion! Thank you for sharing, this is truly amazing.

[@whitneywatson3131]

All the feels on this video! Seriously, had me tearing up because I can relate to her struggles! I am definitely the type to go into freeze mode. I have a challenging, older gelding with baggage that is so eerily similar to me in personality that I struggle with how to respond to him. Which sounds crazy, but it is true. Really enjoyed this segment and looking forward to applying these ideas to this gelding in particular. He is a freeze and shut down to such an extreme it has been tough to communicate with him. I am hoping by learning a new way to communicate with him will allow us to finally build that partnership I have so badly wanted the last 7 years!

[@gloriapischke175]

I am afraid I listened to everyone saying “careful you will get hurt” so now I believe it ! I am fearful in the pasture with him, he knows it. I have been grooming over the fence. He loves it but I haven’t gottten my confidence up to go stand by his side at liberty to groom. I work on being calm and feeling good and relaxed while grooming. He likes to try to bite. I hate that

[@yvonnerafferty7992]

This video is great! I watched it and then had to go spend time with my mustang mare. And then I had to watch it again. She had all the ground work, no trust issues, no bucking when I got on her....she was perfect!! Then another horse spooked, she bolted, I fell off. No big deal. To her it was traumatic, she was shaking. I calmed her down by petting her and talking to her. When she quit shaking I went to get back on her and she ran to the side....she had never done that. It took about an hour before I could even get back on her without her trembling. Once I was able to get on her, I called it a day and just spent time calming her. But now it's been a month. I can saddle her with no issues. I can get on her but she will not move!!!! My husband can ride her. I know she's afraid she's going to hurt me. After watching the video the first time, I kept a closer eye on her reactions and she doesn't like it when I climb the fence, even if I'm 30 feet away from her....she doesn't care if my husband does it. She watches me like a hawk. Guess I have a lot of work to do.

[@Cerealmom]

I too started to tear up at the beginning when Maddy talked about Flicka. I have found my “mirror” horse and have unknowingly been reacting and perpetuating a cycle. This video came at the right time and really has opened my eyes to so much (too much to comment). Thank you!

[@glendacisneros982]

Great video! I really enjoyed your lecture!

[@hg2796]

I needed this! I go into flight & shut down. I’m trying to work on it!

[@Allisonloosemore]

Hi Maddy, I just discovered your Channel and really derived a lot of value from your insights. I react to fear by freezing and my horse reacts with fight and my other horse reacts with flight.

[@ObjectiveComplete]

Thanks Maddy! I'm being pulled back into horses! Been looking around for tips and found you! Got personally asked to put 10 rides on a colt next spring!

[@fredricastenhammar6607]

Thank you soo much for this video! I really need to dig deeper in to my own reactions. I think I go to all three depending on the situation - unfortunately I think it’s most common for me to go in to fight when it comes to horses and dogs but I freeze when it comes to people. I will definitely watch all your other videos as well! Love from Sweden! 💕

[@tinabungener9163]

I freeze.. it stops all progress.. love your videos, continuing learning and progressing :) thanks

[@dleinenweber]

That was amazing. Thank you. Truly inspirational and the words of wisdom thought provoking. Namaste.

[@CarenRisley]

I freeze.....until I'm pushed to far, then I explode. Great episode!

[@MustangMaddy]

And horses will do the same! Thank you for sharing

[@stephsrt4]

My horse is a flight , this really helped a lot

[@ruthfr.-h.3950]

I freeze up to 100%..and by the way this video is soooo soooo great and thank you sooo much. Wow you are so young and so wise for your young age. You are an idol for so much people. Best greets from Austria

[@MustangMaddy]

Thank you so much! And thank you for sharing. I can so relate to you! You are not alone

[@sidpodvorec6183]

Love. Love Love.

[@MustangMaddy]

Thanks so much Sid!

[@lenoremann7171]

love all your various shirts - where do you find them please? I like wearing long sleeves and cotton because I am in the hot sun so often when spending time with my horse.

[@rachelpeters4902]

A current horse that I work with is a 3yo horse named chance his reaction normally is flight Mine is fight or flight thanks maddy you give me so much info to horses and your just so inspiring thanks again

[@MustangMaddy]

Thank you so much for sharing!!

[@The_mare_stare]

How emotional to realize I’ve been going over threshold with my new boy that freezes. I will be working more at learning go’s threshold and how far he is ok with me going.

[@katharinarandschau8763]

hey :-) I really love to watch each episode and learn so much, thank you!! I freeze when being over threshold with strangers, but with people close to me, especially my hubby, I try "to be the better man" and not act emotionally but that results often in verbally lashing out at him to hurt him. I really try to work on it to tell him earlier if something hurt me. I don't have a horse, but our "older" dog Yumi (almost 4 years old) is the same with me. He has really subtle "being almost or being over threshold" and has grabbed/bit me several times. Since working with positive reinforcement, doing a lot of husbandry and especially working on reacting early on to signs that he is uncomfortable it got a lot better. But I have to watch his overall "stress" signs. So Yumi and I are much the same in the reactions. With him I work on honoring his signs of being uncomfortable and with me I work on being able to tell somebody that something made me uncomfortable before lashing out :-) I slept on this thought: even before talking to somebody I want to work on reflecting, which negative thought about myself I have, got triggered by the other person.

[@MustangMaddy]

Absolutely love this Katharina

[@krymsonklover3044]

I go into fight mode. Not necessarily with anger I feel like survival mode kind of kicks in & I start running through steps & scenarios in my mind. My horse reacts sometimes by running away & sometimes she pins her ears & grinds her teeth mostly at me or other horses. Most people say eh, she's just a mare but this video made me realize maybe I need to look a little deeper into what it is she's fearing. She's not very confident but we've come a long way trying to build that up. Thank you!

[@mariasahlgren7954]

I fight back and if that doesn't work I'm using flight. Walking away from a fight is somthing I have taken a lot of negativity from people around me for. But lately I've learnd that it's okey! You actually solve your problems better if you take a brake and think things throug!

[@mustanghannah]

Mystic is such a beautiful horse.

[@MustangMaddy]

She is!

[@RitaMichelle]

This is the first video I’ve seen of yours, and I loved all of it! I tend to freeze, and the horse that magically came into my life is such a mirror, she’s incredible. What you said resonated with me. ❤️ I do have a question that came up while watching, I’m hoping you have an answer: What would you do for a horse that does something undesirable but not out of fear, but more of a playful, mischievous emotion? One of the horses that I’ve cared for over the last year likes to rip off fly masks, pull down gutters, tips over the wheelbarrow, stands up on fence boards/gates, bites latches or wall mounted decoration lol…he’s absolutely adorable but he is destructive. I think previous boarding stables may have hit him or done something because he “tells on himself” by flinging his head back almost in anticipation. My way of dealing with it is removing the opportunity (which fixes the one thing but causes him to find something else to do). What would you do?

[@willmxkid7033]

Aw this is too cute... love your relationship with your fur babies, made me emotional watching, we have recently rescued a colt foal who was abandoned so going to try this with him \m/

[@MustangMaddy]

Thank you! I am so glad this was helpful

[@willmxkid7033]

Mustang Maddy it really was, I’ll know now when my goal stands stock still to take the pressure off 👍 incredibly helpful, thank you

[@alinedumont8845]

I think it's fantastic how you work and what you do with the horses! I love watching you !!!! I have a litlle question. A year ago, my friend and I bought a paint that doesn't like touch at all. He hates brushing and saddling / the mouting block is all very stressful for him. He was always tied up and his former owner didn't listen to him or just didn't see his signals he was sending out. He had always had to work a lot and has actually closed himself off continuously. He is super introverted. We have been able to improve this a lot with counter association/start button. But sometimes he still scrapes his feet and is close to treshold. Touch is still very difficult. Can we do something extra or different for him or to help him with that? Thank you for everything !!!

[@brennajewell4598]

I have a housemate who has me striving to raise my threshold, he is so difficult to live with. The empathy quote made me giggle because he told me he is such an empathetic person that it is painful for him be in public. Don't most of those anxiety nursers say "crowds"? I didn't check myself very well in my head recently and plotted being SO reactive it would terrify him, but then luckily I have decided to move into a tent instead so my good manners are saved. I have been making a lot of fun of how wiggy everyone seems to be around here, and my self examination results are: I must have a horse in my life, then nice responses will naturally be instead of this struggle with reactions and being wiggy myself. It seems to come automatic with a pony project like it's a grounding rod. The real patience challenges then will all be magnificent triumphs (eventually) and everything else will be a delightful game. I am tickled to hear about the click training. I only recently noticed it for dogs. I bet the woman that taught me how to ride would dig this. she was all about monty roberts and pat parelli but HUGE on treats, so i installed my first set of brakes with carrots, and then I gave my ride a mike and ike instead and he started doing those sliding rooster tail stops. but hey, hay cubes it could be until I need a bribe then I gotta find their favorite candy. soooo what do you think of bribes? I taught that poor first horse so many silly and possibly demeaning yet impressive tricks when I learned his weakness for mike and ikes. Maddy, I have only seen two of your videos so maybe you've covered that, but I think you are an excellent and inspiring speaker, and passion is contagious and you are powerful. Mustangs have my full attention so it was really cool to find your videos. good job, and you have the honor of being the first channel I have ever subscribed. to. My life is demanding change and challenge and I am about to begin to wake up with delight for my day cuz it's on the way.

[@passionatehorsemanship3334]

I personally go Into fight when I am scared or vulnerable. I get angry and now I am trying to break that habit and so now I go into flight. I hide.This really resonated with me. Self love for myself is so hard. I say sorry all the time when I don't need to because I feel like I am always wrong.

[@courtneywelch8825]

Omg! I have a horse I named flicka, and she’s just like the girl ‘s flicka she talked about. I’m hoping this video will help me with my flicka! ❤

[@fluffy_mcflooferson4635]

I react with "fight" and get angry, also have a low frustration threshold. I don't own a horse right now, but did years ago and didn't even know then that I could have had a much better relationship with them. Someday I will have horses in my life again, and I'm trying to relearn how to be with them by reading books and watching video instructions. I came across Maddy in my IF feed (which is full of Icelandic horses lol), and so glad I did. I feel like this will help me find my way back to horses in a much healthier way.

[@fluffy_mcflooferson4635]

*IG feed

[@chadwickaren]

Maddy, Thank you so much. One burning question....What state is your home? Absolutely gorgeous, I can see myself living there!!

[@maggie2485]

hi this was such a beautiful episode! when im riding i always feel like im not doing it good enough or right and that im destroying others riding lesson. Im letting myself down, and when i feel like im not good enough, i just go to the middel and stand there the rest of the riding lesson. I say to myself that i can do it but i dont know if im scared to hurt the horse or that i just think im not good enough. I really dont know what to do. Do you have any sugestions how to boost confident a little or trusting myself?:)

[@amydillonequestrian9716]

I tend to freeze! My mare tends towards flight. I’ve been doing a lot to try to read and honor her emotions and keep below her threshold.