How to tell if a girl has a crush on you! LGBTQ+ || Xanthe van der Gulik

[@XanthevanderGulik]

👆 SUBSCRIBE for more videos EVERY WEEK! 👀 WATCH 6 Signs She Likes You LIKE THAT: kzbin.info/www/bejne/d5KclKWZmNOqfrc ❓ What was most helpful in this video???

[@bigguy130]

From talking to another lesbian woman, another problem she came across, was women who were secretly bi-curious, who claimed to be straight out of fear of being honest and open about it, fear of their family and friends finding out that they were attracted to women. So they pushed the limits of what a straight woman could get away with, like hugging and kissing other women and doing subtle flirting. But if a woman came out and asked them if they were bi or lesbian, they would say they were straight out of fear. This lesbian woman I talked to said a woman she thought was straight admitted to her years later that she was actually not straight, that she was suppressing her interest in women and years later she could not stand it anymore and finally came out as bi(and years later lesbian). And she apologized for lying and telling her she was straight when she was not.

[@XanthevanderGulik]

thank you for sharing this with us. I can definitely see where those women are coming from. it can be very scary when you are questioning and you don't really know what you are or how to express yourself. I'm glad your friend got to talk to that lady again years later and clear things up.

[@bigguy130]

@@XanthevanderGulik You're welcome. :)

[@shonnaa7117]

This video really does help me a lot. See, I started crushing on this girl (who goes to the same class with me) who complemented my pretty mask, then I started dreaming about her, and in that dream, we kissed. So now I'm starting to have feelings for her ever since, but I'm still don't if she's crushing on me too.

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Thank you for sharing! Just know that no matter what the outcome, you are a beautiful human and you all the support in the world from myself and our beautiful human community 🥰

[@mariamgorjian]

I will say though, much of these behaviors are really about confidence. Women changing in front of each other for example...that’s just body confidence and likely something that comes with experience. I used to be insecure like you when I was younger, but now I really don’t care. I just realized with time that some women are simply more comfortable and not necessarily noticing what they’re doing because their in their own world. The eye contact thing is for real though. Women are really confusing in that sense! Just call them out on their BS and get some giggles.

[@vespermartinis]

Is it ok to be a lesbian and be completely comfortable hugging and being around female friends?

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Absolutely! Although I felt a bit uncomfortable with those actions, doesn’t mean that everyone feels that way. Hope that helps!

[@katrinabest3129]

Love this video and yes!!! Such an accurate video!!! Still trying to figure out if my crush likes me... ;)

[@XanthevanderGulik]

I’m so happy you liked it! ...she does🥰😘

[@statusuploader5338]

Mee too trying to figure out my crush whether she likes me or not 😭😭😭

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Just know that you will have a beautiful person one day that is perfect for you💜

[@muff1nzzzzz]

I’m going to count this for non-binaries too, since i like one.

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Sounds perfect 😁 just be yourself 🥰

[@AmandavanderGulik]

I love you so much Xanthe! Wow! Wonderful examples, and you're dedication to help other who are wondering about themselves is so clear ... to the point that even when you're beyond tired, you still make taking the time to create these videos no matter what. Best daughter in the world! So so proud of you! 🤗😍😊

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Thank youuu😘😘😘 I love youuu

[@AmandavanderGulik]

🤗💖

[@idknunya5441]

Ate you her mom? Jus wondering

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Yes she is💜🤗

[@KathiStrahl]

Best video I’ve seen about this topic! And very helpful, thank you😊💗

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Oh my goodness, thank you so much for saying this🥰 I’m so so happy I could help!!!🥰

[@jnada101]

great video. one sign they like you is that they get a bit pissed off/angry when you don't give them the attention they're used to lol. where's your plaid cap from?

[@XanthevanderGulik]

That’s a great sign! I’m actually not quite sure where the hat is from, probably a Walmart, but I’ll get back to you if I find the brand 😊

[@ArsiekDHOL]

so here is my "question"/situation. Just discoverd we have a lot similar hobbies and grew up same neighebourhood, same youthgroup, same school, live in the same street etc ..we don't talk often where other people are around, acts stiff and nervous...but if we are "alone" then she is like totally some one else (O.o). Talks a lot more, different tone, much more relaxed. sometimes if she is not talking I caught her staring at me for a long time (pretty often). she only sings when she is standing close enough to me where other people can't hear her. but all this signs confuses me because she has a boyfriend and just bought a house hahahah so I'm probably sooooooooo wrong

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Oh wow, that sounds very complicated 😅 I would say that you are probably considered to be her best friend to her. If she had a boyfriend and is living with him, I would hope she is loyal to him. But at the same time, he could just be her boyfriend because she feels she needs to be with a man. If she is super close and you guys talk about serious things together and she only feels comfortable singing next to you, I would just assume she thinks of you two as friends. If you find that she is becoming more and more close with you (meaning she doesn’t hangout with her boyfriend much or she is kind of ignoring him) then I would consider the thought that she might be in to you. Just don’t get hurt, or try not to. I have been in many similar situations and it usually ended up with my heart broken. I want to protect you, but you also have all the control. I hope this helped in some way. Take care, and Happy Holidays!

[@ArsiekDHOL]

@@XanthevanderGulik thanks for the fast reply :) :) :) it kinda confirm I am so wrong hahaha but yeah we only know eachother for 7 months but it feels like a lot longer probably because we have a lot of similar things that we share...it's probably a "wrong" gut feeling. And also her friend is not really helping with her way of acting around hahah. Last time we walked home together (because it was a step challenge with work and we were competitors) and She didn't want to walk home at all (called me crazy multiple times because I did that for 4 weeks Lol) but it was just one time that we finished as last at work. She asked if I was walking home, and ofcorse I replied yes, and her friend (which always talks very loud :) ) said to her slow and softly,...you two can ...walk together home :) :) :) the way she was saying it really confused me like what are you implaying???

[@XanthevanderGulik]

That is a little confusing 😅 honestly, just go with what you think is best. These situations are so confusing and it’s hard to help when I’m not with you. (Remember that when you have a crush on someone, every little thing seems like a “sign”) just be careful. I’m happy I could help in some way!

[@ArsiekDHOL]

@@XanthevanderGulik by the way happy holidays too :) :) :) :)

[@ArsiekDHOL]

@@XanthevanderGulik that last reminder of yours is a good wake up call :) it's so true haha instead of making things awkward I should be gratefull to have her as friend :) :) thanks ;)

[@katrinabest3129]

Also I love that hat so much!!!

[@Designer239]

1 of my 2 girlfriends said “ it’s not impossible to not love me. “. But I’m not sure if that is a sign or not. But I jus took it as a sign , but I’m not sure if they were straights before I came into the picture , but other than that I do feel like that , I’m the most luckiest woman ever to have 2 girlfriends.

[@CherryMaeCPerez]

My crush is bcba behavior analyst so definitely trying to analyze me hahha

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Oh man😂😂😂 good luck!!!

[@CherryMaeCPerez]

@@XanthevanderGulik what should I do now

[@XanthevanderGulik]

If she is trying to analyze you, I would be honest toward your crush. I know it’s easier said than done, but telling them how you feel is the easiest way to if they feel the same way.

[@jasminjama666]

Hi from london! thanks for video.. and UR CUTE

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Awwww thank you! So happy you liked this video 😁🥰

[@your_eaverydaycat9384]

Ive learned how to not be awkward although I still am. I was hanging out with my friend and crush and then their friends just walked up to us and said that wed make a cute couple and I just stood there like wtf just happened and also said friend has randomly said "We should draw ship art of our ocs" and like BRO AHHHHH do they like me or am I an idiot hElP theyve also said theyre in a maybe kinda unofficial relationship with one of their friends but bRo help

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Hey, I’m sorry you are in such a confusing situation. I would say that the best way to know for sure is to talk to them. Although this might be a hard task, it is the best way to know for sure. You can always guess and try to figure out their feelings, but at the end of the day, you will never know until you ask or talk to them about it. I know this is probably not the advice you wanted to hear, but I am trying to give you the best and most honest answer🥰 Hope this helps!

[@silvianajones4421]

so happy for you

[@MA-rn2xp]

I'm in this situation with a friend of mine who I have feelings for. I feel she does too but not 100% sure. Now she's single and she keeps saying "when she finds her next bf"... and talks about guys and says she loves me so much because we're such great friends but we don't act like friends. I'm terrified of being rejected.

[@sprout12730]

thank you for this helpful video!! i was wondering, what if i have a crush on my straight best friend? the first time i have asked her about her sexuality she told me she doesn't know about it. but she also says she's cis and she's obviously very much into anime boys! but like we both always jokingly flirt when texting and she barley says i love you to me, and it confuses me so much- i sometimes wanna admit to her that i like her just to get that over with, when i know she'll probably see me in a weird way and i know she won't have those feelings about me back! also im subscribing !!

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Hey! Thank you for sharing!!! I would say that if she is not sure, and she likes anime boys, that doesn’t mean that she is straight. Girls can like anime boys and still be lesbian even. You will never know fully unless you ask but I know that is hard. So what I would suggest is to ask her again about her sexuality and see what her reaction is. Ask her about anyone she finds attractive and pay attention to who that people are, are they girls, boys? Does she get weird when you ask her about who she finds attractive? Just pay attention and hopefully you can build up the courage to tell her how you feel. I have told two girls that I have a crush on them, at first it was a bit awkward because they didn’t feel the same way, but after a bit, we actually became auger good friends🥰 I hope this helps! And thank you for subscribing!🤗

[@sprout12730]

@@XanthevanderGulik Thank you so much for responding! I think I'll wait another time to ask her about it!! She's actually an online friend so it's kind of harder to tell. But we've known each other like 8 months or so and I've recently started having a little crush on her. Also, if you don't mind do you have an Instagram? 🤭 I'd love to get more advice from you and stuff! Sorry if that's weird to ask !! :'))

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Yeah! It’s @xanthe_vandergulik (the link is in the description of this video I believe 😁

[@sprout12730]

@@XanthevanderGulik I gave u a follow!! ☺

[@bubba283]

I wonder about some from work. I hope they don't.

[@livvyneale6845]

...sooooo....my crush is questioning if they straight or not....any idea on what I should do? Just wait it out? Rox. I’m not sure please help lol

[@XanthevanderGulik]

I think that you could listen to them while they try and figure themselves out. You could also talk about some people you know who are gay and how they knew, maybe even a celebrity or a youtuber. It’s really nice to get help when you are trying to figure yourself out. Try to just stay friendly with your crush and help them through this confusing time, plus you will be able to hangout with them more often (even if it’s virtual, cuz you know, COVID). Hope this helped! Sorry I responded so late!

[@livvyneale6845]

@@XanthevanderGulik ok thanks so much! I’ve been sort of doing that recently. She is asking lots of questions and I’m trying to answer them as best as I can, but for someone with stress induced memory loss, I don’t really remember much 😅. Sooo because if this, I have recommended a few you tubers I found helpful, one of them being you :)! Thanks again

[@jibalesha2064]

I found your video because need some answers. I have a crush on this girl at work. After met her for the first time i fall for her. Since knowing her sometimes i feel uneasy like warm & fuzzy or mood swing when I think of her. I make the first moved to ask her out for lunch & we went out for lunch twice now. My problem is I dont know whether she is gay or not. We both kind of like sport (athelite person). Need your advice

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Hey Jiba Lesha, I understand how you feel. It can be quite frustrating not knowing if she’s gay or not, especially if you have gone on two lunch “dates” already.

[@XanthevanderGulik]

I wouldn’t base her being gay on whether or not she is a sporty person. I am gay, and I am the most un-sporty person ever lol. I would suggest that maybe you ask her to go out for lunch again and while you are with her, maybe try and talk about dating history or any interests you and her have had before to see if she talks about girls at all. You could also try and talk about the lgbtq community in some way to maybe see how she reacts. I really hope this helped. I’m sorry I don’t have much advice, this is what I would do lol.

[@AN-gi6ke]

Truth

[@sahorycielo01]

My friend was say me i like boys etc.. 3 Years later after say her you are toxic friend I notice she Is gay so 😐

[@XanthevanderGulik]

Oh man, that is an interesting situation 😅

[@sahorycielo01]

@@XanthevanderGulik yeah definilly

[@Designer239]

How can I know that there is a lesbian girl who is into me…?

[@XanthevanderGulik]

I actually have another video that might help you out! It is " signs that a girl likes you like that" : kzbin.info/www/bejne/d5KclKWZmNOqfrc Hope that helps!😀

[@Designer239]

@@XanthevanderGulik That does helps thanks. But um how about making another video , like for those who are super nervous and she doesn’t knows what to do and she wants to get an girlfriend. But also she is really really super nervous about revealing her real feelings.

[@XanthevanderGulik]

I could definitely make a video like that, thank you for the idea 😁🥰

[@Designer239]

@@XanthevanderGulik Np girl. And thanks for the Love ❤️. Ps. Love you 2.

[@jaybuick5386]

I need your opinion on something. Just wanted to run it through you. My girl is bisexual. It seems that she was lesbian. Because she has a relationship with her GF. But she text me and told me that she's pulling away from her GF and gravitating towards me. What does that sound like to you? And do you think she'll go back to other girls if we commit to each other?

[@XanthevanderGulik]

This is a good question. Honestly, the best advice I could give you is to tell her how you are feeling and talk to her about your expectation in the relationship and listen to hers as well. This way you will both have a clear understanding of what you each think and feel. It might be awkward and hard to start the conversation, but it is the best way to get the answer you are looking for.😁