☘️ How To Declutter Sentimental Items When It's Hard To Say Goodbye • Decluttering KonMari Mementoes

[@elizabethlangheim7214]

I’m past 50 years old now. When I was younger I had boxes and boxes of sentimental items. Now I have 1/2 of a photo box of non-picture sentimental items. Twenty-five years ago I had a couple of huge cardboard boxes of paper type sentimental items in the basement that got wet and moldy. My first reaction was devastation but after throwing out the boxes without going through each item because of the mold I just felt relief. My main memory keeping method was photographs but over the last 4 years I’ve dismantled 6 scrapbook albums and pared down 6 photo boxes to 1 1/2 photo boxes. I plan on making a Shutterfly album and paring the physical photos down some more. I’ve found over the years that just packing away items into the basement or back of closets to only bring out when I’m Decluttering isn’t what I want to do anymore.

[@AmandaJYoungs]

If you've ever read the book called "Swedish Death Cleaning" (much more cheerful than the title might suggest), you might feel that that's what you have been drawn to do. Who needs all of this stuff? Some of it just weighs us down, and if we don't sort it out in our own lifetimes, we pass a burden on to our children or other relatives. How will they possibly know what is important and why they might decide they want to keep it as a particular link to you? Decluttering is one thing we can do, but so is passing on things to others in our lifetimes that we want them to have. Then we can watch them enjoying them while we're still here. I find that practical and comforting.

[@rebeccarendle3706]

@@AmandaJYoungs yes...this method I found especially great for sentimental!

[@heatherwhelan1376]

Photos are hard, but when I was down after chemo I did deconstruct some bulky photo albums and I used a scanner. Both boys enjoyed it more in digital form. So I did get 50% reduction.

[@carmenramos2953]

@Divinely Dana 😜😂🤣

[@Beth1300]

How did you deal with things like gifts from loved ones who have passed?

[@julianafedee1233]

I had a dress given to me by my daughter years ago, it was so worn out I couldn't even donate it ,yet the guilt was so great, I decided to call my daughter to ask her if it was alright to let it go... and you know what? She couldn't remember!!!! That helped! I got rid of it.

[@LadyGreyBlack]

It would be easy to do, except when my mom asks me "do you still have X?" or "whatever happened to x?". She makes it difficult to get rid of sentimental clutter.

[@rebeccamyers805]

I finally finished going through my books. 5 bookshelves and 19 boxes later, I’m done for the day. It is so exhausting. Thank you for your inspiration. 💖

[@HowToGYST]

Wow! WELL DONE!

[@porcelina956]

This is why I scattered my cat's ashes when I was done mourning. I didn't want an urn an I didn't want them to be forgotten in a box. I went to a park that has a pretty garden and scattered them their,

[@ravenstormchild6491]

I found an old children’s book from my youth that was in bad shape. I took a page that I really loved that was in good shape and I framed it for my son’s room. Then I happily recycled the rest.

[@HowToGYST]

Aw, that's a lovely idea.

[@ArtistCreek]

I love this idea. I have one absolute favorite among a bpx of 25+ books from my childhood. I think I will buy a shadow box style frame and just put a few of my special memories in there and let the rest go.

[@susanwegele2882]

I'd like to say, many of these items look very like the stuff we see in thrift stores.. the difference is the story. When you keep items, I suggest writing the story. Then, when you're gone others will know the story... Sometimes just a photo and the picture is enough.

[@MariahFan09]

Brilliant!!!!

[@janiec3915]

Thank you very much for sharing this. I've been decluttering a lot of sentimental items lately. Not only of my own things but of ny deceased parents items as well. It's very hard going through these things but a lot of the things they kept were their memories, not mine. It's still very hard to let go but watching this makes it a bit easier. Thank you again!

[@Beth1300]

I'm having to do this just now as my mum passed recently

[@janiec3915]

@Beth1300 My condolences to you on the loss of your mum🤍🕊🤍

[@Beth1300]

@@janiec3915 thanks Janie x

[@nedf8668]

Definitely the hardest decluttering category, especially the things that have both happy and sad memories attached to them. I struggle with that every time I go through my things and I end up just not dealing with it and the problem continues on and on. I guess I just have to bite the bullet and deal with it. Probably have to watch the video a couple more times! LOL

[@nedf8668]

@@dragonfliesfordonna2112 I've got my boxes ready! Now all I have to do is go through them. Thank you so much for your advice and support! Between you, Nicole and Laura I'm getting more done in the last few weeks than in the last ten years! LOL

[@pameehanson3866]

The hardest thing I had to let go of is my old sewing machine. I had it repaired so many times and the last time the man at the shop said it was no longer repairable (metal gears had worn down smooth and would keep slipping as I tried to sew). I gave it away to charity knowing people look for these type of things for their collections. I cried all the way home and was finally at peace because it would be in someone's collection. After that it became easier to let go of sentimental items. The last i have to deal with is photo's. I have procratinated on these. Thanks for sharing.

[@AmandaJYoungs]

I hear you about your grandfather, Laura. I miss mine too, and I'm 60 - he died before I was 30. We had a special kind of friendship. Apparently he wasn't a very good father, but he was the most wonderful grandad to me.

[@hilaryr-d261]

Some fabulous tips and new perspectives. Thank you. I have finally (10 years down the line) started to declutter some of my brother‘s stuff which my parents gave to me after he died. It has taken this long for me to be capable of even opening the box. The first time I got rid of almost nothing - in fact, I barely skimmed the top layer before giving up. Most recently (third wave), I tipped the balance and was able to be much clearer in my thought process. Ultimately, he‘s my brother and I am never going to forget him just because I no longer have his school ties in a box under the spare bed. Those items of his which I would walk through a burning building to recover are out on display and they make me smile EVERY DAY. That‘s (almost) enough. Time for the fourth wave!

[@KimBuchanan]

That box looked hard, and it's not even my box! I know what you mean about the teenage thing...I also have pictures of someone very close to me who died unexpectedly well over ten years ago. I happened to find the photos and her stuff all in one box yesterday and could not even look at them. Yet I can't throw them away either. It's not easy.

[@deannday6930]

Great video, as always! Looking forward to watching this again as I go through some boxes of photos and other sentimental items. I love when you said “We are not our stuff. We all know that intellectually”. My late husband was a big believer in creating memories by experiencing things in the moment, not so much taking photos and buying keepsakes or souvenirs. I don’t need things to remind me of him. I need only to recall those life experiences and memories we made together. I’m so blessed

[@Rubiastraify]

I appreciate your method of paring things down, and doing it in waves. We do have to keep in mind that there are very few U-Haul trailers at the cemetery. "You can't take it with you!" Yes - you are not your "stuff". Still, it's nice to have wonderful mementos from times gone by.

[@melusine826]

as someone into zero waste/environmentalist it is bloody hard to let go of things from that perspective too. It's also all the lost opportunities, all the things that didn't get done or didn't get to happen 😔😭. Really hard to let go of items you hope to still use one day. And I've got rat issue too so that's also gross, lots of cleaning/washing and things that need to just be thrown out that both never got to be used and can't be used by someone else - so double guilt, shame and frustration. Had to move from a big house to a shitty 2.5 room flat with no storage which meant I don't have a lot of space to declutter

[@fwebster6226]

I have never been able to understand why people remember when their loved ones pass away - in our family we still remember them on their birthdays. This shifts the emotion to happier memories. ❤️

[@LadyGreyBlack]

I suppose this has to do with the finality of that person's physical existence from your life, that void left behind. Sadly, I remember when relatives die, and I wish I could let that go.

[@Beth1300]

Because it was a strong, extremely emotional event?

[@LoriAtHomeByTheCreek]

I can't help but remember the day I found my dad lying on our back patio & trying to give him CPR while screaming for help. He was gone. You can't forget the worst day of your life.

[@lynnjames6629]

@@LoriAtHomeByTheCreek 💔😢🙏💪🕊️💐

[@fabienneroure9995]

Your green dress looks very nice on you and thank you for this video. I understand how you feel about your grandfather because I also really miss my papou (grandfather in greek). He passed away a long time ago and the last time I saw him was in Greece. One evening he started dancing to a beautiful greek song and everytime I think of him I think of that special evening. It's bittersweet, on one side I'm still not over it and on the other side when I think of him dancing, it brings me so much joy!

[@mkweber9615]

Good heavens, you have a much healthier back than me! I couldn't have sat like that for 10 minutes, late alone through a whole sort! Bless you! Thanks for the video. Cull every few years is a good plan, especially to prevent damage. Looks like you have some electronic collectables in there. Love your videos and advice!

[@HowToGYST]

Oh I had to move a few times. I have scoliosis so I can't stay in the same position for too long without my spine protesting.

[@youtubeaccount-yr6hb]

You're the only person I've seen that gets the negative connotation items thing. I guess it's common for anyone that has a tendency to get depressed.

[@bogwitchburke]

This category is my own personal monster under the bed... I'm like that bag lady at the end of Labyrinth that is carrying all those memories on her back 😭 So I FEEL you, girl Thank you for the excellent advice and reality check, gently and eloquently delivered as always!

[@HowToGYST]

I have been looking for a gif of that lady for AGES. Can't seem to find one but I regularly want to use her in my videos.

[@calmpositive1292]

Oh shit thts me to...😳😬🤣 holy moly.

[@PhoebesWorldProductions]

Thank you. This was helpful. *hugs* (if that’s ok).

[@MoonSpinners]

My problem is this…and I’d appreciate some advice from anyone please…..I’m in my 50’s, not married, no kids, and live in the (large) family home, which is full of sentimental heirlooms, like China, books, artwork, photographs etc. All I can think about is, when I’m gone, it’ll all be chucked into a skip or something, which horrifies me. I’ve been trying to declutter, but have only managed recently acquired stuff of my own. So, what do I do? Just live with it all and not keep dwelling on what will happen after I’m gone? (because I won’t know about it) or do I part with it all now and try and live with the guilt of getting rid of things that were entrusted to my care?

[@eileengale7661]

You are so brave to be so vulnerable here. Not only are you a decluttering queen and teacher ~ you are a great example of humanity. 😊😌😘

[@madeleine7471]

I am only 7 minutes in in the video yet, and normally I don't comment on videos, buuut I just have to say that I love the slow and calm pace you are taking at here!☺️👍✨ I know many youtubers talk so fast/ hectic to keep the videos short enough or to keep the viewer's attention, and it can be so stressful to watch. I appreciate your content and the One Minute Monday. Thank you for all the good input! Wish you a pleasant week 😊 Madeleine

[@malissakirby4193]

Ditto to that!!!

[@MargoSickele]

Thank you for being so real and so raw, and sharing your process, including your real thoughts as you go through this.

[@sandramartin6949]

Thank you so much for this, especially the part addressing negative memories. I have an item from my mother who passed on ten years ago that is painful to look at and I have it in a place where I see it every day. I have wanted to let go of that painful and constant reminder but feel guilty about letting go of it because she gave it to me. I am in the decluttering process now and after watching your video, I feel much better about letting go. Thank you ❤️🥲

[@ladyandthefrogs]

When my brother died last year, I dealt with sorting though all his clothes aside from one top which I put in a zip lock bag as it still smelled of him. It's crazy as if it wasnt for the smell it would have gone!

[@ArtistCreek]

There is absolutely nothing crazy about that. My husband had a heart attack and wasn't expected to make it, they wouldn't let me stay with him so my boys brought me home and took turns staying with me while waiting for THAT call. The minute I came in the house I made a beeline for the laundry basket. I pulled out 2 tee shirts....one went in a gallon zip lock and the other under my pillow. That call never came...and he recovered despite multiple resuscitations and Dr warnings. But I still have that gallon baggie. I think it's time to open it up and let it go. He is here, better than any old tshirt .

[@carole5648]

unfortunately i'm only thinking of ways and reasons to keep more stuff haha. One thing I was reminded of though, when i was a little girl, and loved exploring, i was going through our basement and found a lovely box that i'm sure was precious once-upon-a-time and inside the treasures of my teenage father, a very non-sentimental person. I felt like i'd discovered gold, so, maybe a time-capsule for when your child grows up is a fun thing to do with some of your items?

[@findingaway5512]

I loved seeing the smiles. I think memories are so fun. I have a bunch of things from the high school years in my basement. Old Stacy was way more fun. These kids sucked the life out of me and my world revolves around them for sure but I always liked the old adventurous me. That won't change. One memory Includes a door at my mom's completely covered in stickers including spice girls. 🙂 she will be redoing that door soon so I snapped some pics but it is full of memories I definitely let go of a ton when I brought stuff to my own house. Even looking at pictures it was amazing that there are people I completely didn't even recognize anymore. Like no clue what their name even was. Not everything holds up in time. I definitely think jotting down notes or memories in journal is a fantastic idea.

[@heatherwhelan1376]

I do try to allow stuff to make me happy by rotating what I display. I use the coffee maker area, do I start the day seeing that happy memory.

[@lizmeechan8735]

Such a great video! Thanks for sharing. The first time you mentioned to declutter items that have not great memories was so meaningful for me. The year my son was diagnosed with a condition we took our annual christmas family photo and I had the photo framed and also put on a coffee mug. So everytime I saw the mug or photo it reminded me of how scary and sad I felt around that diagnosis and how hard it was at the time for me. So each time I reached for a coffee mug I would pass that one over and feel a little something and then around the holidays when I'd display all the previous years xmas or santa photos I'd put that one behind the others. Two christmas's ago I decluttered the photo and the frame- it helped that I had decided to declutter xmas decor and since my son was turning 10 I thought I had to stop with displaying photos from all the previous christmas's - and just this past year I snuck the mug out of the house and brought it to work to dispose of. Btw the green dress looks nice on you!

[@todaychoose_joy8030]

We went through our paper and sentimental items a few years ago, and it was such a relief only keeping the most special items, and it reduced our storage.

[@luna7453]

thank you 🙏 very insightful compassionate point of view, thank you.. I feel not easy on this aspect.. thank you for your gentle approach of emotions in link with things 😘✨ your words are felt like a supportive hug to the heart 🤗i felt better to listen at you, thank you 🤗😘🙏✨💚🍃

[@ericawolfe7055]

Thank you this is the first video that truthfully helps me and let's me be ok with letting go.

[@rebeccam1027]

This is extremely helpful. I'm finally to the sentimental decluttering, but some of it is excruciating. I'm listening to this on repeat as I process. Thanks for this.

[@annainwonderland100]

it took me many year to get rid of things like these. i found what helped me was talking to someone about the item and the reason for keeping it and i was almost like getting closer from the item and it helped me get rid of more beacuse its became more then just my memory but a story to tell. and things that where harder i took pictures and have physical copies of the pictures so it takes place of the actual item.

[@ashleyhasenbein8979]

I have the SAME naked green troll! It was my great grandmother's favorite! For this simple, random thing I plan to like this page! 👍

[@lorenheard2561]

It has been a long time since my Papa,( Grandpa) died in 1997,and the loss is still painful. God Bless Their Souls!!💖☘️🕊️🐦

[@olivemaycards]

I’m a big fan of journaling about sentimental things, especially when the item has no inherent value. If a kid can’t play with it, if it’s not beautiful or useful, if someone looking at it would ask “why’d she keep this piece of junk?” it’s probably something that can be journaled about and let go. Or maybe sit down and share the story with a person involved “remember when -“ which is far more fulfilling than keeping it in a box. I held onto a lot after I moved between countries and left behind my hometown and friends. I needed the stuff to stay anchored in myself when I was lonely and in culture shock, but I’m realizing now I don’t need all the things because I feel at home in my life.

[@mirandaboone485]

Just have a place for everything and you can see it everyday. Like for paper and cards put them in a folder on your book shelf same with pictures. Have a China cabinet for other things. And use the things you can. That’s what I’m doing.

[@crybebebunny]

😊Thank you. Real enjoyed this Video.

[@lorettacali10370]

I have adult children and ask them what they will do with them.... they don't want them so I sell them myself.

[@sandijames6409]

I have a box of pain that I never open. It has to do with my divorce and things that happened with my ex husband. I keep it so that someday my children will understand more what happened during that time.

[@malissakirby4193]

One day I told my daughters THE TRUTH about their father and their brother a year ago Feb. 24th. They've blocked me since then.

[@kinskigirl]

This is a good reminder that I need to scan photos and letters from grandparents to safeguard....

[@Diniecita]

I struggle to get rid of everything because I am attached in some may to most things. I already got rid of all the easy stuff and the low hanging fruit. Now, its all the stuff I jammed into bins and closets.

[@arawakriesch7297]

When I watched this the first time I wasn't able to declutter any of my sentimental items, but I watched it today again and went to my memory-box. I just put it back in the closet with only one item in it.

[@HowToGYST]

Wow! Well done!

[@a.s.8144]

Thank you for reminding me that I am still ME without keeping these sentimental items! That's what I needed to hear today :)

[@tamararussell-czwartacky7105]

This was SO helpful and some of your points really hit home for me. Thank you so much. 💓

[@rebeccarendle3706]

Great video Laura! 🤗. I watch films I know well when doing sentimental.. It takes a bit longer, but makes it a more enjoyable job 😊. Last year in 1st lockdown, I used the Swedish Death Cleaning method for sentimental. It is perfect for this category because it took the emotional out a bit!.. So I asked myself "if I died tomorrow, would I want my kids/family to see/read this stuff?".... If the answer was "no way" eg old letters, card from friends, boyfriends, diaries etc.. I read them, had a laugh and actually wondered why I kept at lot of them for so long🤣 and then binned 95% of that stuff!😁... Now I only have 1 small box with random sentimental, and 1 small box with some old eg toys. I tried to put as much of my sentimental eg in photo albums or on display in my living-room glass cabinets and I now enjoy seeing it all the time (instead of them being in dark boxes)! But also... Eg old t-shirts: I cut out the logo/picture and flat-pack them, now they take up 5% of the total volume of space the whole t-shirt took. Some beautiful cards from my great great Aunt are now framed pictures on my wall. Small shells, fossils and rocks from travels I have turned into art on my wall.... So I appreciate all these things on a daily basis🤗. I bought 2 plastic hang-file boxes for my kids sentimental.. One box has hang-files with one hang-file for each year of the kids lives from birth to 18yrs containing flat stuff eg cards, art, school work, and one box for bulky stuff eg first baby clothes from hospital, christening gifts and candle, some favorite craft things etc... So when they leave home, they will get both boxes and can do what they like with them. If they choose to bin their memories, they can repurpose the filing boxes for their adult paperwork eg tax stuff etc.so recycle the boxes. The only think I want to add to their boxes are printed year photo albums (which I still need to make). My kids and I love sitting and looking through photo albums (and we never look at photos if they are just digital!).

[@beths5283]

One thing I'm really struggling with is my university assignments. I got my degree over 10 years ago and I've kept every assignment. I never look at them. They're just in a folder in a drawer. I kind of feel like i need to keep them but I don't know why

[@olivemaycards]

They represent a huge amount of work! You put so much effort and energy into them. It’s hard to imagine throwing that away, and yet, if they were just gone you would still have your degree and sense of accomplishment, and you’d have a bit more space. I realized recently that many of the things I learned at university are completely out of date now, theories that have been disproved, etc, so those papers (and textbooks, etc) are completely worthless. Have you actually looked at the papers recently? Maybe you’re ready to let them go now. Or maybe not quite yet.

[@embr4065]

Since most of my papers and some assignments are on my computer, there they sit. I can't bring myself to delete any of those papers I wrote! But a box of paper assignments, textbooks, and binders sat in my garage for 6 years. One day, I just tossed the whole thing. Those assignments were a LOT of work at the time, but I NEVER opened that box to refer back to anything so out it went. I don't regret it!!

[@Cristinepedraza01]

Remember to never do this while pmsing 😂😂…

[@julesrobertsyoursocialpa4364]

So if an item ( night dress my late mum gave me) makes me cry, do I keep?! Journalling about it is a great idea, will try that. 🙏🏼

[@HowToGYST]

If it's special and meaningful to you, keep it. Not all tears are bad. The loss is big because the love was so strong. 💖

[@phillipcastillo8519]

I can’t let anything go unless its trash I’ve gone over my house 900 times and I’ll only get 1-2 things and that’s only because they’re broken since my last sweep through

[@HowToGYST]

Progress is progress. 🙂

[@janecoder1]

I will have to listen to this again and again. My mind keeps wandering to the sentimental family stuff, I get overwhelmed and lose focus. Grandpas are special people- I am crying with you. Love your presentations.

[@HowToGYST]

Yes, it's so easy to get overwhelmed with sentimental stuff. It's a lot of emotions to process. But it can be done, little by little. 🙂

[@diaphanouswaffle]

This spoke to me & my struggles, thank you for the content and how you presented it :)

[@HowToGYST]

You're very welcome. I hope it helped.

[@maryflaherty3409]

I still have all of my father’s mortuary cards. I can’t bin them as I do not like the idea of having them on a rubbish heap, can’t burn them but I have about 30 of them shoved in a drawer, any ideas?

[@rosechoix]

Have you considered taking them to different places that he loved/enjoyed and placing them somewhere discreetly? I've never lost anyone super close to me so not sure about the idea, but that's what popped into my head

[@maryflaherty3409]

That is a beautiful idea, yes, I would be happy to leave some of them in his favourite places. Thank you for your suggestion

[@InTheGardenandTheBlessings]

*YEP the only way I can deal with actually getting the items out of the home is to find someone that would enjoy the items, giving them a good home. HAVING a Yard sale seeing the person that wants the item plus asking for a little bit of reimbursed for the item with out much haggle or to a good will all at once, it is very difficult for sure* I still think of a few of the items I sold but its not in our space cluttering I guess.

[@luna7453]

😘😘😘

[@jeannebowes2898]

Tossed four more t-shirts, socks, and undies. I was not the slightest bit sentimental over them! My future estate sale will be very very difficult, though! I am super pared down, personally. But the heavier items will have to go....

[@aperson1719]

Ive been taking photos of things so as not to lose the memory, but I LOVE the idea to journal about it as well... Thank you!

[@lindsey361]

When you have small people to look after things move a lot faster than when it's just you xx

[@kathypflaume4652]

Thanks for sharing with us. I appreciate it 💜💜💜

[@Naztalgic]

Great video. thank you for sharing and thank you for helping people

[@HowToGYST]

That means a lot. Thank you.

[@luna7453]

🙏🌟😘💕

[@HowToGYST]

🥰

[@lynnjames6629]

Thank you. 🙂

[@HowToGYST]

You’re welcome 😊

[@MrsJax304]

I love this one

[@HowToGYST]

Thank you!

[@ginatheng9506]

Thank you. It is helpful.

[@beatricebergmark5524]

This video resonates with me a lot. I inherited a lot of furniture and memorabilia from my dad in my teens; boxes upon boxes with things, photographs and letters. This also included furniture and memorabilia from my grandad - and great granddad. It took me 10 years to even open some of the boxes, another 3 years to go through them back and forth just to sort things out. Last year I structured all the papers in chronological order, putting everything in practical, plastic boxes. This summer I have the urge to sorts some of it out again - an urge for “freedom” in some rare way. I’ve always had a very easy way to say goodbye to “my own” things, not including the memorabilia. It’s a process! Especially if you for a long time have felt the need to keep everything, just to honour the memory of someone who had a passion for documenting absolutely everything.

[@alexandrajacquet5898]

What is the pretty beige book?

[@lorikorstanje2964]

thanks for the tips and sharing

[@ashleytrue7678]

Instead of keeping paper you can just take pictures of it like everything else??

[@carolynkilgore3599]

Gggg

[@iuseaolemail]

This is such a helpful video. And thanku for opening up your emotions to us. Seeing you go through the items, and even in fast mode, seeing you smile at certain moments, reminded me of that true sentimental joy that we should really get when we go through our own things, especially the sentimental items. I'm REALLY enjoying catching up on your videos as I'm getting back to my home tasks (been babysitting 2 little kids since August and this is my first week that I'm not watching them since their mom finished her temp job).