i am autistic

[@Plumbella]

edit: my pronouns are any PLEASE FEEL FREE TO USE THE TITLE AND THUMBNAIL AS A REACTION IMAGE IT WOULD BE ABSOLUTELY PERFECT AND HILARIOUS

[@sidsmells]

screenshotted as soon as the whoretism slide came up

[@ellinorvandentop]

Bloody perfect♥️

[@balknbarbie]

thanks now i know what to do when people get mad because i misinterpret things they say

[@stepheniespetcare6390]

Thanks for this Jessie. You're amazing

[@brendanmcdonagh2004]

This video made me realise just how much my adhd overlaps with autism lol

[@arihart4216]

I was just thinking "I wonder if Jesse will crack out a powerpoint" and here we are

[@iciajay6891]

I mean she had to!

[@itspowers9107]

Not Jesse if she didn't lol

[@iciajay6891]

@@itspowers9107 accurate

[@dorissaclaire]

“I have woohood in the past, I would prefer not to do it again” 😂I felt this in my soul, deep, deep down

[@riqrimoli]

LOL

[@paleiosaur]

The hygiene thing made me wanna cry. I've been feeling so gross lately (socially, not physically) because I keep forgetting to brush my teeth and take showers. Having a job helps, but when I have several days off work I just can't force myself to be regular with stuff like that. It's a huge comfort to know that I'm not alone in this.

[@AxelBain]

Same lol everyone is always like “if you’re autistic you’re very orderly.” I’m a complete mess and unlike my friend who simply cannot deal with mess I simply cannot deal with cleaning things lol

[@ЛукВарёный]

So real tbh😭😭

[@theConcernedWyvern]

I'm so glad I'm not alone here. I'm pretty sure I'm AuDHD and alongside what you mentioned, I have huge sensory issues with slimes and goops and strong smells. Me and cleaning products don't mix and it's nigh impossible to find anything scentless. Washing dishes, brushing teeth, washing hands or hair, scrubbing things down, it's all stuff I *want* to do, but the process of doing so often makes me feel just as if nor more gross, disgusted and unpleasant as the dirtiness. It absolutely sucks.

[@casluvs]

I have recently been diagnosed with autism, and as a 15 year old girl, finding out you’re disabled in today’s society is not the nicest and it almost kind of makes me feel ashamed and embarrassed about it.. but seeing this made me feel so much more comfortable and accepting of me and who I am.

[@SaplingTarot]

It's absolutely not anything to be embarrassed or ashamed of, there's a huge community of us online and you're so welcome. I'm so glad you're feeling more comfortable and accepted.

[@theunexplainable2995]

I am also autistic, diagnosed at 16, best thing to remember is you haven't changed, you've just learnt something new about yourself that in turn will help you thrive ! I am 25 now and I am proud to be autistic, absolutely love it. Hope you find this love in yourself as well ! If you are accepting of yourself then no one can have opinions that hurt, because you know yourself x

[@enfxrn]

I was diagnosed at 15 too

[@ethernetmuncher]

Hi! Im a 17 year old girl also with autism! I was diagnosed at 15 and do not feel ashamed. Its just a part that shapes us truly. At times it will feel exhausting and you will feel low, but always know that you arent alone. I mean it. In a world of glazed donuts, being a sprinkled donut comes with its downs and ups. Take care and if you ever need to talk to anyone im here for you!

[@princessstomper8068]

I'm in my mid-40s, no formal diagnosis, but ticking all the boxes for ADHD. The thing is, label or not, I've always been weird. There's no cure for that, or getting around that. Over many years of experimentation, I found a combination of caffeine and productivity tools that allows me to juggle a corporate-management job, marriage, kid and hobbies (OK, so I've got over 200 active characters in TS4 ...) but, with a bit of help from those tools, I can "have a normal life". I'm just a bit weird, but the people who are worth knowing don't mind that, and thinking differently is super-helpful when it comes to creative work or innovation. Being able to hyperfocus is a superpower. Your diagnosis is just a category label that helps professionals to point you to extra resources if you need them - that's all. It doesn't change who you are, for good or bad. I wouldn't even say you're disabled, as such, just weird like me, but in a slightly different way. Loads of my colleagues are autistic - they tend to gravitate towards technology roles. At least one has "Global Head Of ..." in their job title. There's no limit to what you can do with your life, and you certainly don't need to feel ashamed or embarrassed. You'll find you have your own special kind of superpowers, too, and people who are worth knowing will really appreciate them, and you.

[@Vendyyy13]

"... tried to force me to look into his eyes, because apparently our love could overcome autism". I haven't laughed like this in a long time

[@hannahhester8376]

Oh, man, seriously that's just so mean! Um, I don't have to look at anyone if I don't want to, nobody should ever force someone to do something they don't want, even if it's just looking at someone's eyes.

[@STP981]

one of my exes did that to me. grabbed my shoulders and made me stare into his eyes while he counted to 20. that's not how it works, bud. I'm still autistic!

[@bugsoup3319]

@@STP981 oh my god that sounds horrible

[@jodoodlyboi2963]

@@STP981 ew 20 seconds. No thanks. Also that’s definitely not how that works. Some neurotypicals…

[@mrspeabody615]

i like to deep dive into my bf eyes (correction: eye) Like very closely examining a painting... eyes are fucking beautiful....i still don't like to look at them in a conversation XD if they try to tell you something or somebodys feelings or whatever i'm out

[@payton-day]

im also autistic and its incredibly hard to explain that to people since i am “high functioning” in their eyes. its really nice to see an actual autistic person talking about it, especially someone with a large platform.

[@fancyflautist]

Even my psychiatrist was like "mmmm, I'm not sure" - yeah because I've masked every day of my goddamn life and half of it I had no clue it wasn't something that happened to everyone.

[@buta6608]

Yes! Its so awful to be told you can't be autistic because you're "well spoken."

[@lyaneris]

@@fancyflautist I'm currently trying to work up the courage to get an accessment. I was in therapy for a while -hated my therapist, she was extremly condescending to 16yo me- even she suspected something, although I was heavily masking around her. I also didn't have the courage to change therapists, I feel like thats just not something you do/ is appropriate in society, even though it is the best option. (Sorry for rambling)

[@harmony8623]

I feel that. I used to be called HF but now when people call me that I try to share about how it’s an ableist, outdated term that is used to deny support and dismiss struggles, among numerous other reasons

[@SaplingTarot]

@@lyaneris Absolutely change therapists! You deserve proper care and support!

[@TaylorPlays_]

before the video starts, we love you 💓

[@JoAnyj]

And we love you also now that the video has ended - maybe we love you even a little more!

[@ashleysteele1354]

The whole "you've got so much potential, you just need to apply yourself" bit hits home since I have ADHD but wasn't diagnosed until my last year of high school. Feeling like a failure and getting blamed for it even when I was trying my hardest, but my hardest efforts looked different than everyone elses..those were the days lmao. Still feel that way as an adult but at least there aren't constant grades or test scores to mock me every day now. Maybe the world (especially in educational settings) needs to learn how to offer support and understanding to neurodivergent people instead of shaming them for not fitting into a perfect little box of what society considers "normal" to be.

[@hinasakukimi]

feel that so hard :(

[@nameless568]

Yesss I’m in my 12th year of high school, just got on meds and definitely feel u

[@ashleysteele1354]

@@nameless568 I went from being a C-D student to earning all A's and B's once I got on meds. Even if you already have good grades I hope they help you feel better 💖

[@whoaiLySims]

beautifully said

[@Saraphina6]

I was diagnosed with ADHD recently at 23. I can relate.

[@jessopitz6459]

Plumbella: “…don’t come to me for information, besties!” I’ve learned so much about the Sims from your channel (hello, entire history of and sims lore videos), but also about ADHD, autism, and self love through your content, thank you ❤️

[@mayagrace_]

as an autistic person it makes me so happy that you’re talking about this.I feel like it’s not really talked about especially in women❤️

[@Catbee222]

Same same

[@elliotk7856]

Fully agree ❤

[@Jetfox967]

Same

[@note.da.gøat]

What

[@Poedoco]

every freaking AFAB autistic cis women talks about it wtf do you mean. they always ALWAYS forget about OTHER AFAB people in their binary approach. like AMAB people don’t also experience that- or that non-binary and or trans-masc people (LIKE ME) immediately are omitted. unlike you guys, this topic is extremely sensitive and triggering to me. i could rant about how wrong everyone is for forcing the binary on something way more nuanced but whatever. im pissed.

[@townfool4682]

Its wild to me how much overlap there is between the ADHD experience and Autism experience, especially as a woman. They are such opposite disorders in some ways, but as a girl who wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until college, bestie I relate to so many parts of this video. The experience of consistent stress, struggle, anxiousness, and just feeling socially out of place. It takes such a toll on your self-esteem and self-worth when it isn't caught in childhood. My heart goes out to all girlies out there with undiagnosed Autism or ADHD who are struggling to stay afloat, and who are blaming themselves for all the ways that they can't keep up. And thank you, Jessie, for putting out a video like this. It's so hard to make videos like this because it involves reaching back to some of the darkest times of your life, but it means so much for people to be able to see and understand this part of your life. Disorders like Autism and ADHD are so mischaracterized and poorly understood, but videos like this help people to actually understand what it is like to experience life in this way

[@Kaythought]

Hi I am 21 (college) and I’m 99% sure I have ADHD and I am SO over it. It’s finals in 2 weeks and I can’t do anything.

[@shelley5449]

So my brother's diagnosed with adhd AND autism, and was diagnosed around 14/15 and I'm here at 28 (undiagnosed) and now seeing patterns for both Adhd and autism in myself, and also seeing how each autistic or adhd symptom potentially masked a symptom of the other. Like they're kinda opposite in some ways, but then really similar in other ways and it's hella tricky trying to figure out whats still a part of each (ADHD or Autism) when the other interferes.

[@Super00Specs]

I was thinking the same thing throughout this whole video, especially the "girls are undiagnosed at a greater rate" and "girls are better at masking" parts. I was just diagnosed in 2020 (well into my 30s).

[@BranMuffin365]

I heard someone mention that some doctors are starting to view adhd as a part of the autism spectrum.

[@AnneFleurDekkerYT]

I am a 27 year old woman who received her ADHD diagnosis at 25. Thank you for you comment. And thank you Jessie for speaking up about neurodivergent women especially. Love you all and thanks for the support ❤️ (I never comment on KZbin so this is a first).

[@LunaWitcher]

On a lighthearted note, I just wanna mention that "maluku" sounds like the Portuguese word "maluco" which means "crazy guy" and honestly imagining fetus Jessie waking up in the middle of the night saying the equivalent of "ya crazy, dude" is very funny to me, a Brazilian

[@hobistinyheartbag]

She’s been cultured like that since she was a fetus

[@xxx-ie9ic]

I misread fetus Jessie as fetus Jesus multiple times and I was very confused.

[@v.3oo557]

right? what a genius. maluco é não amar ela!

[@LunaWitcher]

@@xxx-ie9ic clearly Jessie is Jesus in your head, who are you to fight your truth (lol jk)

[@knittedrachael]

super old but she says at 9:20 in this video youtube com /watch?v=dzqNJwrxvZ0 that she started saying 'maluku' because she heard a spanish man say it when she was a child. so you were actually right all along :)

[@samu1745]

Fun fact: the sims is usually a favourite game of neurodivergent people

[@kill4karma]

Makes sense to me, I really like to micromanage things and follow scripts cause of my autism and the sims is really good for that. It's like being able to write a story but without starting from scratch and a blank page

[@Shenanigans_333]

Yup, I love making specific storylines, and creating the characters that I daydream about(and their houses) in sims, and have shown many signs of being neurodivergent Makes sense 😅 Edit: yes I am indeed autistic

[@mrsanonymous414]

I figured! However, gifted it to my little sister in law on the spectrum.. a bit heartbroken she till prefers GTA, but, oh well🥲😅

[@HeyItsNovalee]

As an adhd haver it is the ultimate wish fulfilment dream of not having to deal with executive dysfunction, being able to have a million jobs and hobbies in one life, the fantasy of being productive all the time, getting to feel like what you do matters cause you visually see skills level up as you do them so it’s very motivating. God no wonder we love it so much lmao

[@mariagrader10]

how do you know? was there a study or survey done?

[@Kim-yj5uv]

This is the first time I've ever heard anyone else describe their gender the exact same way I do and I low-key cried.

[@JulesKM]

I started crying when you reached out to the girl who deleted her account. People who genuinely have that level of empathy are so rare in this world, and I just made my day to be reminded that it's not all bad out there. ❤❤❤

[@megasourusrex]

as an ace, it’s lovely to see a “celebrity” or internet personality or whatever being ace. theres very little representation in media and online. it definitely is freeing when you finally realize it 💜 you have no idea how excited i was when you first mentioned it in a previous video. it was the first time i had a “you’re like me!” moment with a favored youtuber/role model/ etc.

[@mem5091]

Ace means asexual, it’s not the topic of the vid

[@myrosseee]

@@mem5091 Maybe not the main topic, but it is briefly touched upon :]

[@sarahekhunter]

This person is aware of that. They are simply touching on a part of the video that connected with them.

[@whoopsiedoodle.26]

Idk if you've seen it already, but Jaiden animations posted a video more recently about being aro/ace that I think was pretty cool. I wish I knew if more but another ace gaming KZbinr I know of is Shubble

[@karmica7591]

I'm not ace, but as a queer person myself I felt sooo glad when Jessie openly talked about it, and I thought it could have been helpful to folks that follow her and are asexual too to feel understood (especially by someone they are fan of/admire/like/anyway you want to express it). Your comment just confirmed this thing to me and I feel really happy for you bestie 🖤 Be safe our there, wishing you the best

[@ronisila3040]

As someone who's been debating looking into an official autism diagnosis, im so glad you posted this video

[@Medusa_The-Bard]

I send you support, I have Autism and ADHD and I hope that you can push for one!

[@violetsoul9113]

I have autism and a few other thingys. I say go for it bestie, even if you know deep down, it'll feel like there's no more doubt, and you can learn about urself more comfortably 💜💛🧡

[@brownleedorothy]

DO IT! Sending love & positive energy

[@hannahhester8376]

Definitely do it if you feel like you have it. Will save you a lot of worrying if you know for sure!

[@jessfidler2356]

I think I need to ask my mom for it even if I think my mom already thinks I have it

[@akithesmallbean]

As a fellow person who doesn't like eye-contact I really appreciate that you don't look in the camera much and as a performer I admire your camera-charisma cause you still manage to keep the public (me) attentive

[@ewitslilli]

As an autistic person, i love it when people i follow on the internet have the same struggles and experiences as me. Thank you for being so open!

[@ettabeckreck4733]

As someone who’s loved you for years and is autistic you’ve been such an inspiration 🥰

[@TaylorPlays_]

me! but with adhd 🫶🏽

[@worldsslowest]

hey as someone with endometriosis, i’d definitely look more into your painful periods and see if you can speak to a specialist about it. i spent like 10 years thinking i was just extra sensitive or something (also some flavor of neurodivergent here) but it turns out i had mega endometriosis. it’s way more common than people think and can be hard to spot because we’re “not supposed” to talk about periods. but throwing up and having that high pain levels is definitely outside the range of normal period symptoms.

[@Danielle-eu3li]

I second this… “abnormal” periods are SO often overlooked and people shouldn’t have to suffer unnecessarily! There is usually a cause that can be easily identified and treated at least to some extent. But I also understand why some choose not to seek treatment because the medical field is scary, expensive, and feels dangerous to navigate.

[@_G3m_]

Came to say something similar!! Endo is very common, so I would definitely recommend speaking to your doctor!

[@nebula402]

Same! When mine was finally diagnosed, it had absolutely taken over my uterus. Also caused fertility issues bc one of my Fallopian tubes is totally blocked now by lesions.

[@axXMISSAYxa]

@@nebula402 agreed, idk if you want kids but it makes me mad when people tell women "fertility is the more important thing for them" and then ignore issues such as pain saying that's just "women things"

[@near4316]

i also have awful painful periods, i get a fever,start shaking, can't eat and throw up, and basically spend the entire days in bed wanting to stop existing, and everytime i try to bring up that it may be something wrong with me people tell me it's normal to feel pain and that maybe i can't handle pain that well

[@simpning]

I was diagnosed with Asperger’s when I was seven and my parents were like: nope, so I was taught to mask it ever since. When the pandemic happened, I was 19 and the most sensible I have ever been and way too tired to keep up the ‘façade’ so, for a while now, I’ve trying to reconnect with this part of me and people as open as Jesse have been quite the inspiration in my journey, thank so much as always!

[@simi_xd4990]

I really hope you have more accepting people in your life by now, you deserve all the love

[@hazeldavis3176]

My mom was the same.

[@user-ui2tj7or7u]

Hey, I;m in a similar boat, I hope you're able to connect with what is 'you' and learn to slowly unpeal the mask.

[@babycakelings]

Just a heads up, I'd really reccomend you don't use the word Asperger's. (You might already know this and are just saying it because that's what you were diagnosed with back then, in which case ignore this comment) It's no longer diagnosed as it was a term created by a nazi to sort between "useful" and "non-useful" Autistic people. /nm

[@meganmarie4208]

@@babycakelings YES! but especially in the early 2000s docs used "Aspergers" to diagnose girls displaying autism because of the historical belief that autism only affected boys i think its important to state our diagnosis, and depict why it is/was so problematic. pretending it didn't exist helps nobody.

[@SaplingTarot]

"I can achieve anything I put my mind to - except go to tesco alone" is a perfect summation of my """high""" functioning autistic experience. Me in a duvet burrito 6 days out of every 7 "Oh I'm high functioning am I? Bitch where?!"

[@jasperpretzle]

Oh god hard same

[@raganfiske8424]

I HATE the “high functioning, low functioning” labels so much. “High functioning” is used to deny support and “low functioning” is used to deny agency.

[@colonyofrats4193]

@@raganfiske8424 🙌🙌

[@briclare]

omg. i have the worst hearing. i thought jesse was saying testicle bc idk what tesco is. 😭

[@SaplingTarot]

@@briclare it’s a big grocery store!

[@Cookie-wo7fy]

The whole interoception thing is a mood, I was diagnosed at 12 years old and I have 3 emotional states: overstimulated, tired, and working.

[@mzpnmomojans2705]

That “Social Difficulties” section was just “god that’s me” “god that’s me too” “fuck that’s me” every single point. The selective mutism is so frustrating and it’s something I don’t feel like anyone else understands and hardly anyone knows about, thank you for talking about it. As someone who’s autistic, I struggle to relate to most people, but you are really getting me here. Oh my god I’ve heard so many “she has so much potential”s in my life. It really hurts because it always feels like “you could be doing something useful.. but you’re not!” which is a very capitalist way of looking at things. Have I mentioned capitalism is inherently ableist and- *gets pulled off stage by a big cane*

[@ratrhythm957]

I love this whole comment so much!!!!

[@grimpoteuthis1337]

Omg not the big cane 😭😂

[@t_sizzler_2032]

Not enough autistic creators talk about selective mutism, especially with the whole "autism isn't a disability" Aspie supremacy thing going on around the Internet. Autism is a communication disorder after all. We shouldn't feel shame in having social difficulties.

[@WarriorDan]

One of the annoying things I've noticed, being on the spectrum myself, in autism-related culture, is how 90% of the people paid to write books and give presentations on it never have autism themselves, and never have any legitimate medical background in child psychology or any similarly overlapping field. It's always the "my friend's cousin's son's friend has autism" type people. Imagine an all-white panel talking about black issues, or an all-straight conservative religious group speaking on behalf of LGBT+ people everywhere. Autistic voices themselves are constantly trampled down in favor of outside voices dominating the field. Good on you for continuing to share your experiences and viewpoints.

[@lj2265]

I feel like this is an unfortunate side effect of the psychiatric field cause this is basically true for all the non-physical disabilities. The minute someone can say there might be something wrong with your brain you're suddenly not considered capable to do things like speak for yourself. Your word is suddenly tainted and unreliable and untrustworthy and must be replaced by a trusted educated person with "their head on straight" such as a psychiatrist or some other "specialist" or "expert". Most of the time they won't get it quite right but even if they said exactly what you originally said it suddenly becomes more valid because they said it. Its not valid unless an outside observer with little experience outside of reading data sheets makes it so. Even just transitioning genders, it was basically all cisgender heterosexual people making the decisions for me and I basically had to plead to the cisgender gatekeepers to let me embrace my destiny while being patronized the whole time.

[@LangkeeLongkee]

It's because they don't think we're capable of speaking for ourselves.

[@pixell8r596]

This is exactly why people like Temple Grandin are so important to our community.

[@LangkeeLongkee]

@@lj2265 but that's the thing isn't it... There are professionals with these disorders. I'm a psych student and I'm not the only neurodivergent person in my class. It's not like we aren't specialists too, they just don't wanna hear us.

[@SaigesArstgo1031]

@@lj2265 This is true for physical disabilities too. I see many people talking FOR wheelchair users, even though wheelchair users are more than capable of talking for themselves. In order to get officially diagnosed with POTS id have to beg able bodied doctors for 6 years. Theyve seen that ive met the criteria for a decade already.

[@MostlyCloudy]

"I don't even want a body." - I've said these words for decades lol

[@jasperpretzle]

Oof yes

[@ratxcx4721]

i genuinely didnt want this video to end, it was so comforting and nice to see the representation, and to actually relate to not only someone on the internet but someone who I regularly enjoy watching and rewatching and just thank you for all that you do

[@natasjavanmeulen]

As a woman with ADD/ADHD and a diagnosis that came too late I would like to give en big THANK YOU for this video! I can relate to many things (you mentioned the overlap).The ableism, and the sexism, and the world not made for neurodivergent people, oh boy, yes! Absolutely!

[@Jordan-nw4sj]

I’m autistic as well, found out when my son was diagnosed. Excited to hear your story. Thanks for being brave enough to share.

[@lesbean5267]

I'm currently in the process of trying to get an official autism diagnosis but kept having "but what if I'm not and I'm making it up" thoughts. However, your video has given me back a lot of confidence in my self-diagnosis because of HOW MUCH I RELATE TO EVERYTHING YOU SAID!

[@miemiex5967]

Yeah same I’m trying to get a diagnosis

[@recordtapesbackward]

the thing is: being an overthinker is also a very common trait for autism :D which could actually point towards you truly being autistic. ;-) I'm both myself, I think your feelings are normal in a way

[@SaplingTarot]

My theory on that experience is that neurotypical people aren't kept up at night by worrying about whether or not they're autistic, if you're pursuing a diagnosis you probably have good reason.

[@QupidLIVE]

literally me but even after relating to this whole video im like but what if im just trying to relate to it to be "different"

[@jesaea]

Same here besties. I feel like I'm making it up with my anxiety disorder too actually, which it's pointless because I do know that I have generalized anxiety disorder. That's so hard for me mentally.

[@Alex-xi9ij]

I love how already you've mentioned how no 2 autistic people are the same. There's this assumption that we are all a specific way when thats just not true. Thank you Jesse 🥰

[@casx21able]

As someone diagnosed with ADHD, Depression, and CPTSD I feel the wondering how well you could've done if the system didn't fail you. The DSM really said symptoms in females who?

[@kaylahaas]

ADHD, Depression, GAD, CPTSD & PMDD and I feeeeeeel you

[@ken-fv9cz]

@@kaylahaas perioddd same except i dont have cptsd or pmdd

[@AxelBain]

Same; there’s also a tendency in younger child professionals to diagnose with ADHD, (which does involve similar medication to autism, due to both involving dysfunction with dopamine metabolization, although with autism it’s also norepinephrine and serotonin metabolization) but because of the ADHD diagnosis the other issues with metabolization get labelled as MDD or GAD. They are the exact same symptoms, but greater awareness that autism is sort of an umbrella for behaviours that could be diagnosed by MDD, GAD and OCD should be encouraged. I was diagnosed young but I always thought I was also bipolar or had dysthymia because major depressive disorder and autism (as I knew it) couldn’t really account for the depressive episodes only occurring intermittently, and not caused by chemical reactions but social exhaustion. I also wondered if I was borderline because I had an experience where I completely disconnected from my sense of self, so I believed I had dissociated, even though I never had any psychotic break, only a break from the person who was interacting with that world. I then learned about autistic burnout and was like oh fuck this is it.

[@AxelBain]

@@kaylahaas me toooo I was diagnosed as a kid but wondered in my teens whether I was bipolar or borderline because of the recurrent periods of depression/depersonalization that I initially thought was dissociation, turns out it was just autistic burnout which only has emerged as a symptom of autism informally and through autistic forums so no clinician would be able to identify it🙃

[@librasaphire1]

ADHD, Anxiety, CPTSD ☺️

[@mardalfossen]

29:45 Anyone with sensory issues with tampons try a menstrual cup. They’re smooth and reusable with all the benefits of tampons. I like them the best because I don’t have to change it as often as a pad or tampon but your mileage may vary.

[@jacobdiaz7999]

mileage 💀

[@sarahstudies8149]

I second this.

[@Ojo10]

I always thought they'd be worse, but now I'll try one!

[@Roserae16]

IS THAT WHY THEY FEEL BETTER?? when i tried to explain why I liked a cup better and I mentioned how uncomfortable it is to put in a dry cotton tampon when you're not actively bleeding, girls looked at me like I was insane 🫠

[@carmenvehslage7810]

it made me feel really validated to hear about losing skills after quarantine bc i used to mask really really well and was becoming really good at managing and navigating social situations and ever since i feel like a failure and even sometimes that i’m just faking my hardships (negative self talk

[@gremli7778]

SAME I feel like a different person in a way, when in reality it's just that my mask is untrained and at this point I'm too tired to rebuild it. It's a weird experience!

[@kaemincha]

this hits so hard 😭

[@shelley5449]

I feel this to my core, I feel like I'm really struggling to hold conversations or think of things to say to people atm, and I just feel so awkward all the time and it's exhausting and anxiety inducing.

[@PenTangleify]

Same my uncertainty in social situations is way up, and my tolerance for nonsense is way down. A lot better at just leaving early now rather than freezing up with anxiety tho.

[@ell8523]

You talking about autism encouraged me to get assessed and I was finally diagnosed at 26. Very grateful for how open you are about it. You are helping a lot of people 💜

[@direravendenial8947]

Plumbella as a man who's in his early 40s you have some serious guts and I am with you on doing this because the more people understand what a bitch this condition can be to live with the better society will be in the long term well that is one of the endgames have in my own life to do. I applaud you for this I was diagnosed at 23 with Mild Aspergers so I am quite aware of the issues of others with the spectrum and advocate for anyone who has it. Your awesome loved all of the stuff you do on here and are a fantastic voice for those on the condition as well. I have a lot of sympathy with a lot of the things you discussed as well I admire the honesty as well and I understand the potential thing as well been there. Really impressed by your honesty.

[@gibletgoblet]

It seems like you're practicing radical self acceptance, which is so validating to not only yourself but to anyone who relates to you. Thanks for sharing and being your real self. It's a rarity these days.

[@m3t4l.h34d]

i have fetal alcohol syndrome which is pretty close to autism, i never knew how much it’s close until now thank you for this. the body doesn’t tell me things. finally i found someone who understands me

[@elix1133]

An hour long video about autism? This is so much more than I was expecting and I'm SOOO ready

[@izzykate1806]

As a woman who is psyching herself up to try and get referred for an ADHD and/or autism diagnosis (a lot of overlapping characteristics so it could be either or both), I love you so much. I’ve watched you for years and even before realising my own situation (bruh when I realised all of the crap in my life could actually be a sign of ADHD/autism it was like a lightbulb going on), I’ve always loved you for being such a positive advocate for talking about mental health and educating others about autism x EDIT I have the body temperature issues too?? I never would’ve thought that’s a symptom, thank you for speaking about your experiences!

[@notgabrielx]

I have ADHD and my therapist thinks I could also have a mild case of autism. But I will say so many things do overlap with ADHD and autism especially sensory issues, inertia and even more things.

[@cryingwatercolours]

Same here, but going about getting a diagnosis adhd/autism is so hard where I am and waiting for doctors is so long

[@missberyl]

the key difference factor in diagnosing autism is how you are with social interaction. do you understand body language? can you read facial expressions? do you understand people's tones of voice? do you understand why people are reacting a certain way? if interacting with most people just doesn't make any sense, you likely have autism. if you are fine with those things, you don't have autism. and i don't mean being stressed out or not, or relating or not, but being able to read and understand the social queues, regardless of if you agree with them or not. hope this helps clear it up a bit for ya!

[@meowmeowmaddie]

I’m on the train home from work and crying over how relatable this is. I’m 28 now and didn’t get diagnosed until I was 27 so v recent. But yeah, it’s great knowing I’m not alone 💖💖💖

[@maidenhuddersfield]

This is the first time ever I've actually thought to myself "holy shit, I really do have autism!" I was diagnosed at 17 after 10 hard years for my parents of getting me diagnosed. Although I've been told so many times that I have it, I've never actually felt it til now. You've been my favourite KZbinr for around 3 years now, and this has made me love you even more. Thank you so much xxx

[@user-bk8qv4lv6o]

i remembered last year that my mother once told me i’d also been diagnosed with autism (and severe adhd) when i was little, but it’d been swept under the rug my whole life because she thought it would “go away”. when i realized it explained so much and was such a relief. i’m really proud of it now! autistic people are so special

[@mialeo]

in regards to the girls show autism differently slide- i’m an afab (assigned female at birth) person adhd, which is another developmental disability with some similarities to autism, and a reason i heard that a lot of girls with adhd fly under the radar is because they’re conditioned to be quiet and “ladylike” from a young age, whereas boys are taught that they can do anything and so they often show the more obvious symptoms of adhd (hyperactivity, impulsiveness, etc) because there’s no social conditioning telling them not to. i know these are two different disabilities, but i feel like this might apply to autism too, and if not it at least provides an interesting angle on the underdiagnosis of girls. P.S. i’m only 5 mins in but i can tell i’m gonna love this video and i’m proud of u for sharing this with us all, much love

[@SunnyGee-jd6pb]

Yess I definitely think how children are conditioned impacts how “easy” it is to identify symptoms.

[@StarStuff.]

Indeed, females with autism and/or ADHD are under or misdiagnosed because of the stereotypes, the lack of research on females (kind of getting better lately) and the way girls are raised.

[@romainsavioz5466]

@@StarStuff. they mask it more then boys and it's easier for girls to mask

[@oliverharris60]

That One Feeling...I relate so strongly... It's called alexithymia (and yes it relates to interoception) - it means "no word for emotions". Usually people assume that just means we can't understand other people's emotions, but it can also be for our own. I find sitting down with my mum with an emotion wheel on my phone the best way. We narrow down what's happened recently and go through words for feelings to see what fits. Then we can solve the problem. It's not nice feeling something and not knowing why or what it is. Or not knowing instinctively that my heart is palpitating because I'm anxious and not dying, because I don't realise I'm anxious. Can lead to bad emotional regulation and mental health struggles. I also have the sensory stomach thing. I also had an absolutely terrible experience starting secondary school. I had absolutely no idea why I felt that way, but I felt like I was combusting and the walls were caving in. I have trauma from the way my school handled me. Luckily, I managed to stay in school and finish with good grades, but it was a horrible experience. I had a burnout at the start of sixth form (ended up moving to a different college and only doing 2 a levels, much better) and lost a lot of skills, gained lots of new anxieties about different things, and generally became 'more autistic'. But acceptance of yourself is the first step to feeling more comfortable. It can be extremely tough to accept your limits, but once you do, life opens up and feels much easier. Be unapologetically you, and do what's best for your mental and physical health. Well done for being vulnerable and sharing this part of your life. It certainly made me feel less alone - I think we'd make good friends. You're a great person and you're doing good work on here. Keep it up 'bestie' (as the kids say lmao)! :)

[@alexjlester]

Bestie lemme just say as an autistic who really struggles on their period as well, period underwear are a LIFE SAVER sensory wise. I highly HUGHLY recommend you try them out. They're re-useable, so it's better for the planet too!

[@L-sillybrained]

also ive been using reusable pads because they don’t have that Texture

[@the_sky_is_blue_and_so_am_I]

OMG thank u

[@kylaping4429]

I was going to recommend these too! I use Thinx brand and I love them. Now that I use period underwear, I don't think I'll use anything else

[@narbiesims2997]

Menstrual cups and disks too! You do have to fully confront the fact that you have a body to insert them tho 🤣

[@melanielinzbach]

Pre medically stopping my period (with my doctor’s supervision) period underwear were the BEST. I don’t have autism, I have ADHD and sometimes with pads I would just forget to change them so I kept ruining underwear and because they last longer (like 12 hours with my flow) I no longer had to worry about that at school

[@patentedyikes]

so many kids grow up just knowing that “somethings wrong” and it makes everything so hard to navigate videos like these are so important and i wish the child i was had a youtuber like you to look up to im so proud of how far you’ve come despite it all and you’ve literally proven to so many that autistic people have worth and a place, thank you genuinely for all your work🥺🥺

[@morganagremory6094]

I was just diagnosed with autism yesterday at 26 and my sister sent me this video. Thank you so much for making it and talking about all of these things, it's really helped me understand and it's so comforting to know I'm not the only one who feels this way.

[@honeyandmud]

oh my gosh, i can’t even express how much i relate to almost every single word you spoke. it’s like we lived mirroring lives, though i’m 34 and only became aware of my autism in this past year. also, this video is really going to help me find the words i’ve been struggling to put together for future conversations with family. thank you for sharing this, jess.

[@kathrynjenkinson2390]

I'm 34 too, and only recently diagnosed with ADHD. My psychologist and I are trying to piece out the rest of my acronyms to see if pursuing an ASD diagnosis is the right course. It's so weird looking back on my life and being like, omg, if only I had known or had some help sooner! Things may not be that much different but perhaps I would not have been swimming up stream for the whole time!

[@vatsilvsgi8606]

I feel you! You are so not alone. I'm 36 and recently got diagnosed with ADHD after being incorrectly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder for like, 15 years. Life-changing is too weak an expression to describe how that diagnosis affected me. Night and day difference. But after speaking with my doctor quite a few times since then, I feel like there's so much more going on and watching this video set off SO many lights in my head. I want to take this video and sit next to my doctor as we watch it...with me just pointing erratically screaming "THIS!". I'm agender because gender doesn't make sense to me, I dropped out of college twice, I am WAY too intense with my political views, I was a great student but I was either super overactive or so shy my teachers forgot I existed, I'm a perfectionist to the point it's personally detrimental...the parallels are wild. I have always loved Jess and her amazing videos, but this video just tattooed it for life!

[@myne1213]

As an adult who was told at almost 40 I have ADHD (late in life diagnoses for female is real) and a mom of a child with autism I appreciate your openness and what had to be a super difficult thing for you. Thank you for taking your time and limited spoons. :)

[@babybunnybelly6531]

I’m so glad you talked about hygiene. I get so overstimulated brushing my teeth. I hate it. I’m embarrassed to talk about that most of the time and I’m terrified of going to the dentist. I have ADHD and suspect I have autism but I’m afraid to go to the doctor 🥴

[@DanielECulbertson]

SAAAAAAAAME!

[@fayedavenport8687]

I feel this to ,I struggle sometime (regularly) but I feel like I have to do it to fit into society and not be judge by others when I lack doing it

[@Galllifreyan]

you may already have known about/tried this, but if not check out unflavoured toothpaste!!! it doesnt take away the feeling of the brush obvs but for me it helped SO much

[@jessv4300]

@@Galllifreyan I switched to using fruit flavored toothpaste for kids and I find myself way more motivated to brush my teeth lol :)

[@erased_creature]

Same it's just that i feel literally nauseous brushing my teeth

[@rutheforbandet6157]

Can I just thank you for mentioning Autigender? I’ve been debating whether I’m non-cis for a little bit, since I don’t feel particularly strongly ‘female’ and realising that my neurodivergence can affect my perception of gender (as well as relating to your account of gender) just made everything click in my head! (I’m a partially agender demigirl btw!)

[@AxelBain]

For me I understand why people with autism don’t identify as much with their assigned génder because with autism there’s always this alienation between who we are and how we express ourselves in public, for which gender is one of many expressions. In my case I’m very very cis, but I do sometimes wonder if individuals who still feel insecure with their gender identity even after years of different forms of expression without finding one that’s comfortable are actually autistic.

[@happyjellycatsquid]

that’s a very interesting way to put it, because while I am cis I just don’t feel anything at all about my gender. I was born with female genitalia and I am also super feminine so yay I guess (how much of that is internalised social constructs we will never know bestie 😟) and it’s a genuine struggle for me to understand people difficult journey with gender, not from a lack of empathy but because I was told I was a girl and never had any feeling about it since 💀

[@alyssa.herrin]

My daughter scripts - all the time. The repeating quotes and acting out her favorite scenes. Her memory for those things is absolutely amazing. She’s only 9 - it scares me sometimes because I don’t know how far she’ll go, but at the same time it’s exciting for the same reason. ❤️

[@BBDOT]

people don’t understand how much energy goes into masking or being “high functioning”. ive gotten more autistic (for lack of a better phrase) over the last few years because i had a full on years long mental breakdown and in order for that not to happen again ive needed to stop masking and have a lot more support for my autism. it really sucks because people look down on me or think that im just not trying because it looks to them that my autism has gotten “worse”, when in fact my mental health has literally never been better!! ive never been more stable or less anxious and yes my autism is more apparent and i have regressed quite a bit but that is not necessarily a bad thing

[@mzpnmomojans2705]

Aaaa I’m so happy for you! I’m in the exact same boat and it’s super reassuring to hear someone else speak on it. It’s scary to stand against social norms, but gosh does it feel good!! I do it everyday now. I’ve adopted a “if you think less of me for [autistic behavior], that’s a you problem-I’m having a blast!” mindset. We’re all in this together, so I’m sending my support your way!

[@FelineFurKin]

I’ve had similar happen and I’m great now cos I’m not trying to keep up with a job, for one thing, and letting go of other expectations.

[@spillinda]

I have BPD and had such a similar experience!! hope you’re well! the pandemic also make me realize my “delayed” mental breakdowns were really the losing the mask and relaxing the quiet BPD to speak. life truly can feel like a chore

[@mavymagdowney9798]

omg this relates to my journey with mental health and trauma so much. it feels like i'm taking steps backwards but really when i was "functioning" i was just ignoring my needs. this makes me feel so much better to realize that progress doesn't always look like progress from the outside

[@harmc2301]

I was tested for autism as a very young child, and at the time my parents were told I wasn’t autistic because I could make friends and I was somewhat social. With how long it’s been since then, my mom and I are convinced if I was retested I would be diagnosed with autism. I don’t feel a need at the moment to get tested but part of me does think I am. Jesse, thank you for making the video and sharing your story💚💜

[@LysolMyFace]

I recently got diagnosed with ADHD so while I don’t relate to all of this, it’s so refreshing and helpful to hear that people who I might have thought had their life together and did things according to the general life plan, don’t or didn’t. I’m 22 now and I completely relate to 18-22 being terrible years. And hearing that you did college 3 times makes me feel so much better about where I’m at because I’ve been failing and dropping out and starting again for the past few years. And then when I finally was getting into something, covid happened and we had to work from home and I couldn’t do it. It’s nice to know that other people, people I like and look up to and respect, have gone through similar stuff and life isn’t perfect.

[@FelineFurKin]

I did university at 18-22 and graduated, but now I can understand why it wasn’t the easiest time. Also I have adhd and I ended up far more interested in a fandom and making a website about it than focusing more on my degree.

[@niceshoelaces808]

I really thought the ‘Polish’ part of the slide at 6:15 had something to do with having Polish ancestry 😭😭😭

[@sailorsable149]

You're not the only one! I thought it meant she obsessively learnt Polish.

[@jasmijnluyten3252]

TW: talk about ed, depression So relatable, I went through a rough depressive episode and my OCD, eating patterns etc got really bad when I was about 12, was hospitalized for 3 months, all kinds of tests in those months but didn't came back as autistic until I was 16 and finally got the help I deserved. I hope all women, minorities, non-cis people, LGBTGIA+ community, POC get the diagnosis and help they deserve.

[@piperbeeep]

uh oh bestie. i relate to an alarmingly enormous amount of these bullet points... 👀 since the pandemic started i've had my suspicions that i might have adhd or maybe autism but i feel like this video definitely confirmed i should sit down w a psychiatrist and see wtf is up w me lol. thank you so much for sharing ur experience, bc i think its going to help a lot of people

[@esmaypintor]

Girl same! I’m behind you on this one

[@Sarahpurple12]

Girl, I totally relate to the part about being able to hear electrics! My dad fitted a light dimmer switch and if it wasn't completely clicked on or completely clicked off, I could HEAR the buzzing - he thought I was crazy! Also, I had very big differences in behaviour from primary to secondary school, too. Quite the same as you, actually. In primary school, I somewhat enjoyed being there, thought the subjects were fun, and managed to do full-time (well, as full time as my physical issues could allow). Then I became a fucking shit show at high school. I went from loving classes to sobbing not to go every morning, to then sitting at the side of the road and refusing to move. I, too, attempted suicide at a high school age and was put into school counselling, actual counselling, and put on AN HOUR A DAY timetable because I was that much of a nervous wreck. I have a monotonic voice, too, and it is the BAINE of my existence.

[@Rose-xe7oj]

I was the same! I was a wonderful student in elementary, I remember my teachers would often praise my sister and I for how well behaved we were with the exception of how often i cried because i would just get overwhelmed by seemingly small things. Then middle school hit and all of a sudden it was unbearable to go to school. I would get physical pain from my anxiety that was so bad it made me cry, and I found myself begging my mom every morning not to send me. I haven't been diagnosed with autism or adhd, and it wasn't something I thought about until I watched this video and realized just how much I related to it. If you're wondering why I never thought to get a diagnosis, it's because my mom has generalized anxiety and we just thought I inherited it. Unfortunately, I found out recently that anxiety can act as a blanket and cover other mental illnesses. One of my doctors did mention something about how I could have dyslexia and adhd, but I'm just not sure how many of my symptoms are because of my anxiety, or if it's because of something else? Sorry for ranting, I'm just a bit conflicted as to whether or not I should be concerned by how much I related to the things she talked about in the video.

[@abzreedus]

jesse i’ve been suspecting that i’ve had autism for a while, but i’m 17 and a girl and have always been too worried that people would narrow it down to ‘teenage issues’ or something. when i was younger i thought i had ocd because i was struggled so much with sensory issues and things being ‘even’. that was my first sign, and things like that have continued to develop and become more evident as i grow up. you breaking down all of these things from the perspective of someone who is actually autistic has helped me to understand that i should be tested, and i’m going to show this video to my mum to hopefully help her understand what i go through on a daily basis. i might even make her a powerpoint :) thanks so much !

[@izzyf5765]

One of my classmates got diagnosed when she was 17 and it really helped her to understand her better. At the same time she didn't share that with everybody, so no one could judge her because it was not their business. Maybe it would help you too :) and you can still decide if you want to tell others about it

[@happyjellycatsquid]

You go babes ! I got my autism diagnosis at 17 (and I’m a girl too) so know it’s possible ! I’m rooting for you :))

[@balknbarbie]

definitely get tested! it's way better if you get diagnosed before 18/while you're still at school

[@abzreedus]

@@izzyf5765 she sounds really brave, thank u so much for replying!! :)

[@abzreedus]

@@happyjellycatsquid i’m in awe of u tysm, i hope i can get the diagnosis too! :)

[@jexxica_28]

As someone who is pursuing a Special Education career specifically in ASD and has a deep-personal connection with ASD. I love love love this video and I will be utilizing this video always as a reference to not only educate myself more but others as well.

[@lankastols7817]

You hit it on the head when you said "I'm just me" essentially. We can all strive to just be ourselves and to be comfortable being ourselves. A lot you said resonated with me and I admire and am inspired by your confidence. You're just awesome - lotsa love and support all the way from South Africa (bet you didn't know you had supporters this far away ey? 🤣) 🧡🧡

[@ameliewickstrom5367]

I have never commented on a video, because it gives me severe anxiety, but I felt like I had to on this one. I´ve been watching you for about three years, for most of that time I didn´t know much about autism. It wasn´t until around eight months ago that I met my girlfriend, that has adhd, that I realised I am also most likely neurodivergent and very autistic. Now when I watch you´re videos I see things very differently, but I also see so much of myself in you. It makes me feel so validated that there is someone out there experinencing the world similarly to me. For the last six months I´ve been trying to get diagnosed, and I´m finally at the last stage and I´m soon going to learn if I´m going to be put on the waiting list! I really appreaciate what you said about self-diagnosing, because I´ve needed to assume so to be able to cope with my life and try to understannd myself better. Unfortunately my family aren't as understanding as your family are, but I am thinking of maybe showing them this video for them to hopefully understand better. Either way, you´ve mentioned doing this video for some time, and I have eagerly waited, and I´m so happy that it´s here! I hope you know how much it means too people too have representation like you, and even more how much it means that you are brave enough to talk about it, because it helps people like me understand, validate and accept ourselves more. Just, thank you! Also as a side note, you are my special interest at the moment, and my days are filled with just randomly and compulsively saying your qoutes out loud and I love it! I love yous

[@mrsilikeeggs]

Some of these are things that I haven't heard anyone else say, like not having an instinct for hygiene and going to the toilet being overwhelming, so it's nice to hear them from another Autistic AFAB person with ADHD. I also feel like if I didn't have my Mum I would need a carer lol.

[@jennytimelord9689]

My son is autistic. His doctor leaned in one day and said to me, "you know.... the apple doesn't fall far from the tree! You should get tested." In fact, in his original paperwork, it says mum shows symptoms 🙂 unfortunately I don't have health insurance (I'm american) so we will never know officially 🤣 but I wish people understood that there are so many different ways to be autistic. My son's biological father is a real cad, he told my son he doesn't have autism. 🙄 he says his friend has autism and he "knows what autism is" and refuses to allow my son to think he has autism. Its really hard to help someone you love when their father convinces them they don't have autism! My son was evaluated by 2 doctors AND the school and found to have autism. I raised him for 15 years with his dad barely in his life....and I know he has autism. But this man .... 🤦‍♀️🙃 still, I wouldn't change him for the world! We are extremely close and when he has moments of self awareness about needing a break or having a hard time, I have more hope someday he will accept himself for who he is and know it is not an insult. My very long-winded way of saying THANK YOU for speaking so openly about yourself, so hopefully more people can learn to accept others who are different. . I know you can't fix it or cure it, but I love watching him exceed the doctors expectations and soar! One thing they told me about him was that that IF he was able to work to support himself it would be in a lab somewhere, not working with the public and he is nearly 16 and successfully runs a computer business where of course he works closely with people of all types and he has already proven that he can do anything he sets his mind to and that there are so many different ways to be autistic and no one can say for sure what someone's life will be like on the Spectrum and I think that's beautiful

[@mem5091]

Can’t u pay for a doctors visit to get diagnosed

[@CelticFairyBox]

@@mem5091 its expensive. An appointment can be 300 dollars or more depending on what.

[@absolutelydandyza]

Finally, someone who’s just like me! I have Asperger’s autism with Attention Deficient Disorder and Sensory Processing Disorder. I have got to give you an applause for being strong enough to tell everyone that you do in fact have Autism, not all autistic people have the courage to openly admit of what they are. I’m very open about it, I support people who have the same genetic disorder (even if they’re on the different side of the spectrum) as me.

[@Tswizzle_sizzle]

I'm a 28 y/o female and I am also autistic!! I think most of us sim girlies are!! 😂❤ I am labeled “high-functioning” but life is so hard for me sometimes. I miss the aspergers label bc I think it described me better.

[@Anna-og7si]

The part at 20:00 makes me feel so understood! I can't look at my phone either and THE WORST is when people put a bunch of pictures of the family in their toilets... Who wants to be surrounded by staring eyes?! May I wee in peace?!

[@Kay-iz1wk]

Now I related to this but in the opposite way, I get sensory overwhelm when doing so and have to use music/ videos as a way to keep myself relaxed and distracted from the noises 😂😂

[@MegaRangers2009]

I have ADHD and my sister has autism, we used to hate each other as kids because of our clash with the two ‘disorders’. Now as adults we see how similar we are and I think we understand each other more than anyone else on earth. I loved this video, and really appreciate getting to know you more 💕💕

[@sixyellowwalls]

I cried throughout this whole thing. Feeling so emotional, about me, about you, about how sad I am we had to be confused for so long, about how proud I am of us. I love you, Jesse!

[@pelinette]

I work as a counsellor at a disability services clinics where I see young adults/adults with high functioning autism. I genuinely feel like showing your video to my clients. You’re incredibly funny and on point Xx

[@mcgregor8095]

Best care for Autism with Doctor Isibor Alternative Herbal supplement work perfectly well on my Autistic son 💯 he can now communicate especially with me and sleep's better now ☺️🥰 If interested you can give it a try and contact

[@Nixie_the_Pixie]

Even though I've known about my Autism diagnosis for a year now, I still feel incredibly reassured that there are other people who experience life as I do. Thank you for sharing this

[@lewis4442]

I have autism adhd anxiety and apart of the lgbtqia+ community even more so we both live In Middlesbrough and her videos have seriously helped me through a lot so I understand what it’s like to be autistic in this world 🥰😍

[@lillybrown4228]

I have neurodivergent issues which have plauged me throughout my life. I have always been so misunderstood. It's so frustrating for me. I find it difficult to navigate the world around me. I'm glad to see that someone I follow has some of the issues I have. It makes me feel less alone

[@chakra_gal]

Man, I feel you and understand you so hard.

[@MontyGeldard]

i really appricate content creators talking so openly abotu being autisic, growing up i never was able to see other people like me just exist, the only time i would see other autisic people it would be like educational inforation about autism or at the butt of some elses joke, which made me feel so isolated, so having people be able to talk about autism while being still a well liked content creator is very nice to see

[@zoegranville7607]

I've been watching you for a few years now and before you were openly autistic I was sus on you. I love how open you are and I appreciate vids like this. Only came across this vid now lmao but its funny how MY experience as a socialised female autistic was how I saw your signs :P

[@caitieeeee]

as someone who was diagnosed at 17 with adhd despite CLEAR SIGNS LMAO I feel the frustration of being a woman who is neurodiverse. Also there is so much crossover and connection between adhd and autism and we often make good friends for each other 🥰

[@catgirl1894]

hmm... and as someone w both add and autistic traits i make a great friend for myself 😂🥲

[@aylaerdmann]

I remember the issue of taking things literally when I was like 6? My dad told me to clean my room and everything on the floor would get thrown away. So I picked up everything I liked, and then went through my closet and threw all of my church clothes on the floor. Then I went through and did a purge of all my toys I wasn't that into. My dad came back after like 20 minutes and there was double the stuff on the floor from when he left. I wasn't trying to be a smart ass, I thought he was 100% serious and everything on the floor was going to be thrown out.

[@dog0fman]

a great watch, thank you for this. i’ve been watching you for a couple of years and i’m an autistic guy so was interesting to learn about your experience and how there’s a lot of things we have in common but also a lot that i don’t personally relate to. so true that there are many ways to be autistic. i’m really happy about the success of your channel and how you get to do what you love, you should be proud of yourself. all the best!

[@iciajay6891]

I had my Dr tell me straight up tell me that there was no point me getting a definitive diagnosis for my Autism. He said as a woman there was no point and nobody would care. ( note, I am disabled with other things and on disability in my province, and need diagnosis to get treatment) Anyway, what a great thing to say, to your ptsd patient. Great job you old geezer. I promptly left him as a Dr. ( he had been my Dr since I was born) and found a Dr under 40 who was female. And guess what, she treats me like a person! ( note, in my country ( Canada) there is no mandatory retirement age foe Dr's. So you can have Dr's in there 80's still treating ppl. And they only leave when they want or when there are enough malpractice mistakes that they make. ) my old Dr I have found out is in the malpractice situation rn.

[@_superbia]

i can relate. my gp told me i couldn't be autistic because i have empathy and i can emote. i disagree with their reasoning.

[@LunaRuna212]

It's really outrageous how women, young people, poc etc keep being treated this way by doctors. Like I've been on an 8 year long journey to get a diagnosis for a physical illness and I still don't have one, while my symptoms are getting worse and worse as I age. When I was 19 they kept sending me home saying things along the lines of: "Nah you're still young, you can't be that ill." Only after I turned 26 they started looking into it and it feels like it's too late and being this ill without knowing what's really going on has made my depression become much worse (been always depressed because of childhood trauma). And then they make me wait like 4-6 months until I can get an appointment with a new specialist physician so the years just pass by. Also when I asked a psychiatrist (she was so old that she retired last month) about certain disorders I might have which contribute to my daily suffering, she bluntly said: "But being diagnosed with that wouldn't help you." EXCUSE ME WHAT. Not knowing what's wrong with me is like the worst thing that I have to live with every day. Fck you.

[@georges9760]

It boils down to money imo they don't want to pay for a diagnosis, also they don't care unfortunately.

[@iciajay6891]

@@georges9760 you don't pay for Dr appointments in my country. So there is no reason for him not to get me diagnosed. It would actually have led to more appointments with him which would have him more money. ( in Canada your tax money pays for Dr appointments. They get paid an amount for each visa.) So he would have been making more. But being ability and sexist ment more to him I guess.

[@emiengee456]

There are far too many drs here in canada that are WAY past retirement age.

[@first782]

The entire section about feelings is so validating to me, I didn't know other autistic people experienced any of that. Gave me the feeling of 'IM NOT ALONE!!' if you get what I mean.

[@theodorbacher1144]

im afab and autistic, and this video makes me feel very understood on a level i havent been understood in ages. i really apprieciate this video

[@ellerose4353]

I was diagnosed two months ago and it has improved my life in many ways (finally knowing what is going on) but I've also had a hard time adjusting as I've been noticing everything so much more and it almost feels like my traits are heightened. Also, I was so unaware for such a long time that I have such little knowledge of autism and I'm slowly realising more traits and learning more about myself. I had a meltdown before this video but watching it has completely eased almost all of the things I was struggling with. So many of these things I didn't realise were autism and I've had so many breakthroughs while watching. Thank you

[@teeeale]

this video has helped me understand myself more, having autism recently diagnosed. thank you so much for sharing x

[@aspennie5321]

Jesse!!! because of you I was brave enough to go to the doctor to get assessed for autism as I relate to you on lots of levels, I got diagnosed with autism earlier this year at the age of 16. thank you for being you and helping me and so many others

[@tallulahbrown5864]

Well done stay strong

[@aspennie5321]

@@tallulahbrown5864 thank you

[@AtomBonnieBaby]

The regression section has absolutely been my experience too. I've been signed off from my job since December and I've barely wanted to go outside, but I'm being kinder to myself now! Knowledge of my autism and ADHD (I just turned 30 this year and got diagnosed with both within the last year and a bit!) has been so empowering for me...My biggest goal is trying to get back a bit of "Me" and be more accomodating to myself! This video is so relatable, thank you for making it! (also love a good PowerPoint!) Patiently waiting for my Sims burnout to end it's run...gave my soul to finish a castle build...I'm mega proud of it, but it drained me!

[@mystichlo]

i'm autistic too & this is SO relatable. especially the part about "that one funny feeling". everything has always felt the same for me and i can only figure out what i'm feeling if i talk through it with someone or really sit down and think about it

[@gertiethedino]

Something that I find really interesting in talking about how your body doesn't signal its needs to you as someone who plays the Sims, it brings me back to the versions of the game where they didn't really have any autonomy, and they were fully reliant on their carer (the player) to direct them to do those things. Even if it wasn't something you could recognize or identify at the time, I can see how that would give you a sense of familiarity and maybe why your connection to the game has been so strong.

[@lyswenn]

Somehow I've often about the Sims' needs scales, defaulting to that simplistic representation and regretting that it isn't that easy IRL. Feeling stressed because I was visualizing my needs depleting and feeling overwhelmed at all the things I had to do to get them back up in the green. It's just been a very common comparison in my mind and now I wonder if/how that'd relate to autism.

[@thequeenundisputed]

I'm not autistic, but I do have ADHD and I found myself relating to a lot of this! It's very interesting, how autism presents in women is really underrepresented, but autism as a whole is very stereotyped and our culture is coming to know more about it over time. I've always noticed that I get along with people who have autism a lot specifically because of their tendencies to have special interests. I just love when people are passionate about things, it's wholesome to me. The contrast to this are the people who are constantly making ironic jokes because they never want to reveal what they're interested in or shitting on others for sharing their genuine interests (which you touched upon when you mentioned people's hatred for stereotypically female interests) and I just HATE that. I don't think I could ever be friends with anyone who makes fun of other people for their genuine enjoyments that aren't hurting others.

[@mkadollarsignh]

it’s wild because everyone has special interests on some level, but a lot of them just frame it to sound cool and blasé, and judge others for being outwardly enthusiastic about things. most of my friends are NT, but i consider them “autism-adjacent” in that they are also unapologetic about their niche interests, very open in general, and think “quirkiness” and random infodumping is something that makes you cool! like yeah, my friend is super outgoing and shit, but she also spends 45 minutes explaining the storyline of sister wives and DMs me every robert pattinson meme she finds. i dont think i’d be able to have NT friends if they weren’t like this lol

[@thequeenundisputed]

@@mkadollarsignh I think it's insecurity, as I said in my OP. I'm actually curious if autistic people have greater "special interests" at all, or if it's just that because they can have difficulty reading social cues and take things literally they don't realize or internalize the shame other people are trying to make them feel about their interests, and so they're free to enjoy them to their fullest extent, social norms be damned. I wonder if someone who didn't have ASD, but had similar ASD-adjacent disregard for social norms if they'd have special interests to the same level? For me, growing up I definitely felt shamed for things about me, and now I've come to a point very similar to what Plumbella was discussing at the end of this video - I've just come to realize that I really, genuinely like myself. I like my interests. I think I'm funny as fuck. I think my moral compass is on point. I think I'm a genuinely worthwhile person and I have a lot of confidence in my ability to take on any task I set my mind to (and again, this may be because of the hyperfocus/inertia thing she was talking about, since I DEFINITELY overlap with her in that regard with my ADHD). But yeah, I think when you genuinely like who you are, the idea of not being enthusiastic about your interests feels so foreign. I still do have that twinge of "am I talking about D&D too much?" or "do I talk about the same things over and over?" but I find it happens less and less, and that I care much less even when these feelings do emerge. I'm still aware of the social stigma, but my thought is more "what is 'too much' when it comes to doing something that brings your life joy?" you know? Whew. You got me ranting. I have to stop myself now because I WILL keep talking and that IS a threat.

[@sewcialanxietea1021]

After watching this, I've finally had the courage to call my GP and make an appointment to talk about the possibility of my being autistic. Thanks for being so open, Jesse.

[@skyechats6276]

I'm a person with ADHD and I can barely sit still I can't focus on like anything and I just sat through watching is whole video because you edited it so well and It kept my attention This is a complement, I can't even handle videos over 5 mins 💕💕

[@SaltyRadish42]

I am currently in line for evaluation for ADHD and for autism and I've been binging your content and just bumped into this video in my binge. When you talked about your breakdown about your process of polishing your room being disrupted I instantly snapped to how my room was ALWAYS in a state of organized chaos. I knew where things were because they had general regions I had them exist, so to speak. One time in my earlier teen years my mother took it upon herself (lord knows why, she had her own ball of things going on) to clean my room and I cannot express how deeply upset I was that my things had not only been touched, but moved around. I'm pretty sure I even openly expressed my anger to my mom that I didn't know where my things were placed anymore.

[@SaltyRadish42]

Also! The teenage breakdowns omg. I dived straight into depression once I went into my teen years. It was insane how unhappy I was with how I felt in the world. The only things that brought me real peace were playing video games and diving into the fictional universes I treasure.

[@callmeobsequious]

That whole discussion about the transition between primary school and secondary school hit really close for me. I legitimately started tearing up. I ended up being disenrolled during my senior year because in my _junior_ year, I decided that if I couldn't handle school, I just wouldn't go anymore. It wasn't out of defiance or anything, I just hated school. I hated how alienated and constantly stressed out I always felt when I was there. Everything felt like so much all the fucking time no matter what I did, and eventually I just gave up. That was back between, like, 15 and 18? I'm 21 now and I have my GED and am planning on starting college this coming fall. I'm not done with the video yet because I had a Moment over this, but I'm sure the rest of it is really wonderful too. Love ya Jesse x

[@sharniandboolprop]

Really appreciate you making this video! Started suspecting my nearly 2 year old son could be autistic, and when I started researching autism I learnt a lot about autism in females that I didn’t know, which lead me to believe that I am also autistic. Still working towards getting doctors appointments and things, as you said getting diagnosed can be expensive/difficult, so I’m doing my best. But I really related to a lot that you said in this, which was helpful for me ❤️

[@sabinajoh]

period stuff: I had the same problem, you should never feel that impacted by your period and it's worth taking a look at! I have suspected endometriosis and I've been on continuous birthcontrol for like 6 years now and I love not having my period. It's such an anxiety trigger for me, I can't focus and I just want to stop existing or like just sit on the toilet for 2 weeks until it's over. But If you can, find an OBGYN. Also if you hate cotton, Have you tried menstrual cups? I can't use them (or I haven't found the right one) but they are supposed to stay there the entire day

[@jessv4300]

Anytime I see something about period cups online I have to recommend the JUNE cup! i know a lot of people try a variety of cups before finding what works but june is way cheaper than other brands so it’s a great place to start!! and of course it’s worth mentioning that sticking your entire hand up your cooch is its own strange sensory experience but again they’re pretty cheap so it’s worth trying imo :)

[@peittoburrito]

I also highly recommend menstrual cups. They basically make period disappear: you can use the cup the whole day and you don't have the "leaking feeling" at all, so you can pretty much forget about your period (of course the pain is still there if you have pain during period). For me cups are also cleaner option: I sometimes use pads and they always make me feel dirty and smelly. Cup is easy to clean and doesn't smell, and no dry ichy cotton-feelings. The only downside is that it probably takes a bit time to get used to use the cup, but it is 100% worth it. Internet has plenty of experiences, istructions and tips! :)

[@azalearay291]

I hate the feeling of cotton pads! I don't like the hassle of minstrel cups either. What I found works for me is period underwear. I know there are more brands emerging but Thinx is one I use. They feel like normal underwear and you can throw them in the wash or hand wash them. The only downside is the initial cost, (long term it is money saving I no longer have to buy period products). I find it so worth it as I am not mentally screaming for the week my cycle appears having to deal with bulky pads or worry.

[@AlexaFaie]

I tried cups & didn't get on with them. Those things HURT so damn much. Like the pain of tampons dialled up to 11. Turns out that my uterus and all the gubbins are tilted so there's not actually the correct line for things to fit inside. I now use reusable pads as the disposable ones I did use started adding fragrance to the ones which were supposedly fragrance free (the "masks odours" bit is literally just a fragrance) and they caused me pain. The reusable ones I use are super soft against my skin & I don't end up with painful swollen labia like I did with fragrance laden disposables. My periods are still painful, but at least my genitals aren't having an allergic reaction at the same time. 🤣

[@Elvele]

I have adhd and i have suspected for some time now that i also am autistic. I can relate to a lot of things you said here but its so interesting to see where my adhd changes things up on me. I feel much better knowing im not alone in my struggles and feelings. Theres a lot of stigma about these experiences and i feel so much shame because of what I've dealt with growing up undiagnosed and i never talk about this in depth but hearing you share it makes me feel so much better about it

[@alliep_078]

I’m autistic as well. Thank you for sharing and helping me feel less alone.