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What will you do if you caught your husband on dating sites or dating apps? In this video, Paul explain and help you better understand what is happening, and hopefully, convince you to take a more realistic approach;
What is going on in our world?
All you have to do is look at television, watch the movies, read the magazines and people are deluged with bad behavior and it's accepted. Let's get a drink, let's smoke some pot, let's date other women, let's date other men -- it's horrible. The whole idea of marriage has been lost to this generation and I don't want to get into a deep explanation. I just want to help you with this but I also want you to understand that your husband is human and he too is susceptible to this negative immoral environment that we live in, you are too. Now, it is wrong for your husband to be on dating apps. Don't misunderstand me. It's wrong, it is.
You could say reprehensible. You could say it's disgusting. You could say it's unforgivable and if you do if you're not able to forgive your husband then really what you want is you want to find someone to help you get a divorce and that's not what I am about. I'm about helping you recognize that if you see this as a wake-up call instead of as the end you can not only save your marriage which I really want you to do but you can turn it around. You can make your marriage literally amazing from this point so I'd like you to consider something. Consider that today begins the rest of your life with your husband and you have the ability to win him back.
When I say you can win him back some women take this as if it's their job to win him back. No, it's not your job to win him back now that he's strayed. It was your job to win him every single day of your marriage. That was your job. When you got married and I'm not turning the tables here but I'm showing you a perspective that's going to help you unless you want a divorce. I want you to have a different perspective. I want you to recognize that the reason he's on dating apps isn't because of the environment that's what gave him support to do it but it's because he wasn't getting what he needed from you. You have the power.
Men are not as strong unfortunately as women are when it comes to resisting temptation
and there are all these biological reasons for this and I'm not trying to give him an excuse. I'm trying to give you a way of recognizing that he's not evil. He's not evil and you can now win him back and don't think you can win him back by competing with the temptations
of new and better which is what a dating app is all about. The dating apps and there's
many many men on these dating apps who are married -- it's shameful but it's always for the same reason.
The culture that we now have this women's lib culture has abandoned the idea of women
being the heart of the household. They've turned this equality into equal, equal, equal instead of different but we are all equal because we're all souls. Men and women are not the same. You as a woman have something that a man does not have usually and that's the connection to your heart, not to your emotions but to your heart. It's very different.
There's a Sanskrit word for heart chit and it represents a feeling that is not like emotional feeling but the feeling of the soul, of the heart that is overwhelming love as a woman
because of biology and because of the need to take care of children. This chip is opened up for you almost automatically. You need to only tap into it and not reserve it just for your
children. It should have been opened up to your husband right from the start and I could go into all the explanations of why that isn't the case and a lot of it, unfortunately, begins with promiscuity. When women are dating, generally speaking, they're having sex and they are opening up their bodies to men and so they have to close off their hearts because if you put that combination together it's very hard for the woman to reconcile her role with the man.
Okay, we're getting a little far out but the point of it is this. Once you're married, you have to line up your heart with everything that you do with your husband and this is the trick, this is
the key, this is the solution. It's not just, "Honey, check out my body," because you want to
compete with the potential that he's now realizing on these dating sites. You don't just start smiling because that's how you did it when you were dating. You should have never stopped smiling. You should have never stopped being complimentary.
Why? Why would you do that?
We get married to be happy. You did, he did but we forget to make each other happy and then we get into this death spiral. I call it over-familiarity. It's outlined in both of my books and in the courses.
Watch the video for more.
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