I Cheated on My Husband (Should I Tell Him?)

I Cheated on My Husband (Should I Tell Him?)
Send John your questions. Leave a voicemail at 844-693-3291 or email www.johndelony.... We want to talk to YOU!
As heard on this episode:
- BetterHelp - bit.ly/3seoBCe
- DreamCloud - dreamcloudslee...
Get John’s new book, Own Your Past, Change Your Future here: bit.ly/3Lmf076
Get a money plan for real life! Start your free trial of Ramsey+: bit.ly/2JcSe6H
Learn how to change your thoughts, change your behaviors, and change your life. Subscribe to the Dr. John Delony’s show!
www.youtube.co...
Twitter (@johndelony)
Instagram (@johndelony)
Facebook ( JohnDelony/).
These platforms contain content, including information provided by guests, that is intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. The content is not intended to replace or substitute for any professional medical, counseling, therapeutic, financial, legal, or other advice. The Lampo Group, LLC d/b/a Ramsey Solutions as well as its affiliates and subsidiaries (including their respective employees, agents and representatives) make no representations or warranties concerning the content and expressly disclaim any and all liability concerning the content including any treatment or action taken by any person following the information offered or provided within or through this show.
If you have specific concerns or a situation in which you require professional advice, you should consult with an appropriately trained and qualified professional expert and specialist. If you are having a health or mental health emergency, please call 9-1-1 immediately.
Ramsey Network (Subscribe Now!)
• The Ramsey Show (Highlights):
www.youtube.co...
• The Ramsey Show (Full Episodes): www.youtube.co...
• The Dr. John Delony Show: www.youtube.co...
• The Rachel Cruze Show: www.youtube.co...
• The Ken Coleman Show: www.youtube.co...
• EntreLeadership: www.youtube.co...

[@robertballard4611]

She won't tell him, she is looking to justify not telling him

[@listrahtes]

Sometimes telling is the more selfish act. It really depends.

[@gabrielmenezes8206]

No​@@listrahtes

[@joev7014]

@@listrahtesnaw that would be selfish. Thinking about yourself

[@clydefowler5560]

You don’t tell him.

[@cantorcarmen]

Telling him is hurting him more than anything. What good can come out of this?

[@spencersmith312]

This is so awful. Charles Spurgeon once said, "So many times we trade an ocean of trouble for just a teaspoon of pleasure." Sin is a dreadful thing that should never be entertained.

[@zeal4god402]

The wages of sin is death and in this case, death of intimacy, death of joyful communication, and possible death of the marriage

[@mirabella2154]

I like that quote.

[@SDALLE99]

Must be pretty cold up there, on your high horse. Sometimes you just have to embrace a bit of darkness to feel alive. Dogma leads to death. Live and let live.

[@mirabella2154]

@@SDALLE99 If you need to feel alive, jump from a high cliff preferably without a parachute. Just leave other people out of your "darkness".

[@reedriter]

@@zeal4god402 I really think this is a big danger at gyms. Any personal trainer should not take their clients out for coffee- they should set up strict boundaries so this doesn't happen. Just asking for trouble.

[@VliengWieng]

My wife did this to me, she told me that she 'kissed a guy' and that it was a mistake and it was over, I took us to counselling. The therapist saw through her lies in 5 minutes and she cracked open. Turns out she had a full blown emotional and sexual relationship with a coworker for a year. I'm divorcing her now. Cheaters are the biggest selfish assholes on earth.

[@dpeagles]

Stay strong friend. Been there

[@7seas852]

If they tell you it’s worst then whatever they tell ya. I found out my wife had an emotional relationship I let her cheat a lot of family and friends where mad when this was revealed I made sure her parents caught her 1 day I invited them out to lunch same spot my ex wife and BF would go. Knowing she would of cheated but I stopped her I wouldn’t be able to trust her the same way so why not let her go full tilt

[@cjpreach]

Betrayal. That's the hardest to deal with. If a stranger is cruel to you, it hurts less because you never invested your deepest trust to that person.

[@steve6631]

Stay strong.

[@vicmanm010]

Good for you man. And im sorry yours going through this. Be strong in the Lord.

[@tcasper22t]

Not only did she sleep with this other guy but she lied to her husband about it in counseling. That relationship will never be the same. Trust is gone. Ive been there.

[@gunner3921]

Totally agree. He probably went into counseling thinking “this is where the truth comes out and I think I’m open to forgiving.”. Now that the window has closed, lord knows what he’ll do.

[@gd8205]

SAME. Been there. It won’t change

[@neurotechman]

​@@gunner3921what's sad she probably did things sexually with the other man that she never does with her husband, and that's another thing 😅

[@bossmanham]

Yeah. Not sure it's salvageable.

[@gordocarbo]

Same here lots of us have. Gotta be the worst thing a person can do to another. Ultimate slap in the face Only thing her husband needs is a good lawyer and some strange..

[@angeldaroseli3031]

This totally pisses me off. Disloyalty is unacceptable.

[@infotechsailor]

She’s a 304. Watch fresh and fit. Red pill men. A comfortable woman is a bored woman and bored women cheat.

[@Mangofruitbowl]

Real

[@catastrofakilluminati4884]

Most women these days. What a pos she is.

[@arielsea9087]

If the script was flipped she'd be angry and betrayed. The outcome is inevitable. It wasn't only cheating, it's the lying Double punch in the gut.

[@marciaeovino3584]

When you tell your husband be prepared for a divorce. He will never trust you again. Good luck

[@Lejuno1]

Indeed,there is thing that you should keep to the grave and not doing it again. Because telling the other will destroy a family

[@Dandosa1]

@@Lejuno1hard disagree, keeping this secret is just as much of a marriage killer as the cheating itself. Tell him, hope to god he forgives, earn the trust back, and most importantly, NEVER DO IT AGAIN!

[@kaikai-pb7fh]

No man can love a women who's been with another man during their relationship. Disgusting, get rid immediately

[@CruiseMajor69]

​@Dandosa1 The problem is that apart from not being able to trust again, the husband can't be sure it won't happen again

[@ImRestriaL]

Imagine having two children… married for 5 years… and still decide to cheat. This fucking world is a scary scary sick place.

[@SamuelPradhanisfit]

My dad did this when I was 7 or 8 urs old...it tore me my twin brother and my mom...I have forgiven him 16 yes later but I dotn accept him as my father anymore

[@DougIIGB]

@@SamuelPradhanisfitso stupid. If a man cheats it’s just sex and he still lives the woman he’s with, for women, they cannot love a man and cheat. Men can.

[@Melior_Traiano]

@@SamuelPradhanisfit Some people aren't ready to be parents.

[@SamuelPradhanisfit]

@@Melior_Traiano that is y making children without conscious discussion is wrong brother

[@charlesbell5500]

Well her personal trainer is obviously a pro at picking up women, he's good looking, tall, and her husband probably doesn't workout and is probably a push-over.

[@mweiland88]

13:25 “What would you do different” “I would have told him the first time.” And THAT’s what reveals her real character. Hope he ran.

[@flugamenastyedits24]

Right, the answer should’ve been I wouldn’t have cheated. She also reveals a lie in that moment she stumbles on saying the first time. Then tries to clear it up by saying I should’ve told him everything the first time. Couple that with her only stopping bc she was caught. My conclusion is she didn’t just have sex with the trainer one time.

[@ProfessorOfLogic81]

She joined the gym to find exactly what she was looking for, and she found it. She waited until the end of the conversation to reveal that she was the one presenting herself as single and available. She has learned nothing and I really believe she wants him to end the relationship so she doesn’t have to.

[@Hybeekay99]

Exactly rhe comment have been looking for! She wanted to cheat so badly that she presented herself as single.

[@rocketman7471]

If you want to end the marriage then you can tell him.

[@lindatannock]

Why can't a married person go to the gym?! 😂 That's a ridiculous statement to make lol 😆 ​@@Hillsman001

[@lilblackfish2009]

@@Hybeekay99 who says ppl who present themself as taken dont cheat lol or ppl who meet someone that say thier taken care what dose that have to do with them lol married ppl cheat with other married ppl it happens all the time

[@TheBlackAztec3]

@@lilblackfish2009No one said that. You’re reading comprehension is on a 3rd grade level. She wanted to chest so bad she appeared as single. No one said people that appear as married dont cheat. Read carefully next time

[@BRMachiavelli]

Shame her. Don’t call her brave.

[@devadii24]

Delony was way to nice to her but different when it’s male callers who cheat… it should be the same vibe…. it’s the same act….

[@straight-edgemalu]

@@devadii24his a nice guy and not a good man, doesn’t surprise me.

[@MRkriegs]

It's because shes a she and not a he.

[@hamidmohaddes2774]

This is the guy she tells you don’t worry about.

[@jaws23100]

So so so true

[@msmit152]

4:33 She's a liar......she's probably lying about it being a one time hookup.

[@jtahoe81]

@3:13 he tells her how brave she is??? If a man cheated like this Dr. D nor anyone would call them brave.

[@fsu3784]

Exactly.

[@manuel007dragon]

It’s just a tactic to make people feel comfortable

[@austinmillus7]

Facts

[@EazySqueezy-chan]

​@@manuel007dragon not people, just women

[@abhijitdande3293]

hes a big time womanizer , but when you call him out on his you would see all kinds of gaslighting in all possible directions! haha

[@Dev-In-Denver123]

This woman never told her husband about cheating, kept doing it and got pregnant from the other guy. They’re divorced now. I heard about this from her ex husband’s brother. She felt no remorse for any of this

[@cplmpcocptcl6306]

Thanks for the update. Hopefully she receives the same treatment she doled out.

[@1984wasthebestyear]

😮😮😮

[@InvestgoldUK]

Your post should be further up the list. Awful woman and I got the feeling she just called hoping the presenter would say best keep that bit quiet forever.

[@michaelmoran2125]

Honestly if he heard this id be out. Idk if yall can hear it when someone's happy over the phone. But she's an easy read. She liked cheating that was a big kink for her. Probably some ugly girl when she was young and couldn't deal with adult life. Hope she's paying child support.

[@ephapax1]

This aligns with what my intuition was saying to me. After this convo with Delony, she wouldn’t tell him.

[@ryankelly8077]

If the guy knows his worth, he’ll file for divorce, hire a solid attorney, seek counseling, and begin the long, drawn out process of moving on with his life

[@mariejane1567]

why when she wants forgiveness?? would you say that for a man?

[@dannydevito4975]

@@mariejane1567 Yes. The fact that you defend her speaks volumes about your own character.

[@-MOYST-]

@@mariejane1567 forgiveness doesn’t come without consequence.

[@altx7]

Oh yeah just f*ck the kids then right? It’s not like they matter at all. He can just move on with his life cuz that’s what matters in this situation🙄

[@ryankelly8077]

@@altx7 - uhh he’ll take majority custody while have him & the kids in both individual & family counseling

[@nickdaven3520]

Side note- this woman has no remorse. Very easy to feel it in her voice and how she expresses herself in this. She fears the consequences of her actions. It is sickening.

[@gordocarbo]

Disgusting. She has no right to cry about all the people (kids) that will be affected by this. DIdnt care at the time she decided to get some strange dik in her!

[@johnmcdonald6277]

She did not block her lover until after her husband found out! This woman is not sorry for cheating, she is sorry that she got caught!

[@RatIceCream]

Her saying her relationship was “unhealthy” is probably a coping mechanism. If anything, she’s the one that was making it unhealthy (even before the cheating)

[@charlesderry5374]

I am so sick and tired of people saying that cheating is a mistake, it’s not. A mistake is missing an exit on the freeway or forgetting my keys. Cheating is a conscience decision that people make with much thought behind it. And I hate when John says you are brave for coming forward with this. Admitting that you committed adultery on your spouse is not brave, it’s cowardly and selfish. A person who is brave is one who confesses going through major trauma and coming through it and confessing it.

[@alwaysyouramanda]

Big on that last part. If you’re feeling horrible and and are thus dedicated to preventing it from ever being a temptation again, wouldn’t the idea of saving him the burden of the thought and living with it as a form of repentance or something be the out your lizard brain is looking for?

[@kyleh4339]

Yea, my brothers wife cheated on him with 2 kids. She chose men satisfying her temporarily over staying loyal to her family. She denied all of it for over a year and denies anything to this day and claims that the guys are just friends. She always goes out to clubs and bars without her husband and finds men, and still denied all of it. Worst part is the two small kids are now forced to grow up in a house without a father, with drugs, crime, and poverty all because she wanted to indulge, knowing theres no consequences for her actions.

[@justinchapman1001]

She packed on a few pounds after baby # 2 headed to the gym to feel better about herself and the first chad/Tyrone that gives her more than a friendly smile she bangs and all it took was a $4 coffee lmao

[@PasturePig]

Sometimes putting it so bluntly helps to cut through the 13 min of her excuses. Awesome comment lol

[@Unami0929]

Now hiring: personal trainer. Want to get paid and laid, sign up for an interview. Flexible hours, perks include free gym membership and one-on-one sessions with overweight middle age women who could use some attention. Acting skills a plus.

[@drippin_sauce9874]

I took that guy a $4 coffee to sleep with a married women now image the hoops she made her husband go thru

[@achavez78]

Facts!!!! Alpha seed, beta need!!!

[@mrcwoodworks4523]

That’s sums up this episode on to the next one

[@breannabaldridge6547]

Imagine going through infidelity and finding out 10 years later that it happened more than 1 time and you had believed a lie for 10+ years. Talk about PAIN

[@gcforTRUTH]

yes, I know.

[@deleon5522]

John is way easier on this woman than other men who have called in regarding the same subject. Come on John.

[@andreaj8319]

This is tough because when it comes down to it you put your relationship and your children’s stability at risk for a dude at the gym that probably flirts and does this type of thing with a lot of women. Unfortunately this is the *choice* (not mistake) that a lot of married men and women make and it’s not worth it.

[@zeal4god402]

What we don't know if this is a dude that would have continued his flirting if he would have known the truth of her relationship status

[@mambofuego5101]

Female nature…

[@henryanaya8459]

@@zeal4god402 I think it would have depended on the dude and how this woman carried herself after she told him she is married

[@greg6909]

@@zeal4god402 unfortunately this type of thinking is very naive. No other guy owes you or your relationship anything. It is 100% on the ones in the relationship. Instead of acknowledging thus though, it's easier to blame others.

[@andrew8168]

And we all know C. Ramsey and Company would be MUCH harder on a man...

[@edwardwatts2566]

She cheated once she’ll cheat again- divorce her immediately, never take a cheater back

[@chiliconkyle]

Not always true. I cheated on my girlfriend of 2 1/2 years once, didn't tell her for months as I went into a downward spiral of guilt, lost weight, depression, I finally told her. We broke up for several months. I stopped drinking, started seeing a counselor, focused on bettering myself for me and started feeling good again. She unfortunately went into a downward spiral of drinking and I tried to help. We grew apart and then our paths crossed and we started seeing each other again. She got pregnant, we've now been married for 10 years and have three kids together and I haven't cheated again. Nor have I come even close. I was in a stuck, negative, angry place when I did it, and I will never let myself slip back to that. I fucked up and then realized I had issues that I needed to deal with and I did. My wife and I have our issues and we work through them. It's not a cakewalk but it's a commitment full of great times and hard times. But once a cheater always a cheater is not always true. It truly depends on who the person is.

[@randomuruk7230]

​​@@chiliconkyle You're still a cheater who hasn't come across the right opportunity.

[@chiliconkyle]

​@@randomuruk7230 That's a narrow perspective to judge a stranger by which often reflects on how one feels about themselves. Not that you see yourself as a cheater but maybe there is a part of you that you feel ashamed by, and that you are unworthy of forgiveness. I hope you find balance if that's the case. You can call me a cheater. I am nothing, I am everything.

[@Ferrarix777]

​@@chiliconkyle Correct, not always. However, in this day and age, it has become easier for it to become so. Cheating stems from a lack of respect for your partner. When we have all of this media flashing throughout our lives to compare and contrast, we don't think about what we have. It causes us to not only take our partners and lives for granted but become delusional. The current theme of hookup culture only makes cheating even more of a reoccurrence. Anyways, good on you for fixing yourself and rebuilding your life. It takes accountability to own up to your own faults and work on them.

[@Pamelina1111]

It’s not just about the infidelity. It’s about the kids now. They need to get therapy and work it out.

[@dearbrave4183]

She's laughing a lot and I don't feel regret in her voice. It's like fun and games. I pray for the husband and the kids🙏🏼

[@sh4wnb880]

I must be the only person in the comments who does hear regret in her voice. If she didn't regret it she would have denied it from the get go

[@jadegreen1554]

@@sh4wnb880I think you’re a good judge of emotion and have a good emotional intelligence. People listening to this either have a lot of betrayal trauma or don’t have emotional intelligence atm.

[@elfascisto6549]

​@@jadegreen1554 go to any video that says anything similar to this one's subject matter and you will see a bunch of ""red pill"" men who just seem to be displaying betrayal trauma

[@garethbarry3825]

​@@elfascisto6549so i feel desperately sorry for people who have been betrayed- i dont think i can even begin to imagine how aweful that must be. But, this woman, imho, is NOT some 'piece of filth' that many of the comments suggest. Yes, she made a terrible, terrible mistake. And she needs to own that. And that stage of life with small kids IS hard on a marriage- any married couple with kids can testify. I personally hope that the husband stays in the relationship- there are 2 innocent kids and a united home is simply better for them. Again, i have no right to judge if the man chooses to not stay, as i have never been cheated on by my gorgeous wife, and i will always be faithful to her. Ultimately, i hope that this woman learns some valuable lessons. I have read that an affair is never an event- its a process that starts with too much eye contact, too many compliments, which leads to, which leads to etc etc. I have always maintained that a close purely mutulally platonic relationship with a member of the opposite sex is impossible.

[@ox1dyz961]

@@jadegreen1554she may be laughing because she’s nervous, doesn’t change how she is constantly deflecting responsibility, she also doesn’t seem sorry that she did it, she seems sorry he found out something shady was going on.

[@AmonAnon-vw3hr]

"A horrible mistake" A series of conscious decisions is not a mistake.

[@ChardeeMacdennis339]

So many people are like “you’re throwing away 5 years” and I’m thinking “it’s ONLY been 5 years and she’s cheating?” Idk. I’ve been with my husband for 20 years. We’ve been married for 16. If you enter into a monogamous relationship it’s a commitment. We are all human. We all have attractions and fantasies and that’s fine. But we also have to be mature and realize we willingly made this commitment to someone and therefore work on that commitment day in and day out. I have been in positions where my husband was not paying me enough emotional attention… and as someone who kind of needs that attention I realize it’s the kind of thing that could lead me to think (just think) of other people if those needs are not being met. I still wouldn’t cheat but when I’m feeling that way I literally go to my husband. And say “hey… I feel disconnected. I want to deal with this. I need more emotional attention. Are you lacking anything?” Marriage and monogamy are hard work. It’s cliche but it’s cliche for a reason. It’s true. Open marriage is always a thing if you’re not into monogamy. But don’t commit to monogamy if you’re not willing to put in the work, IMO.

[@rikubear6549]

This is great advice and very insightful. Me and my wife are also working on things weve beem together for 15 years. We have stopped having sex. Every so often i will check in with her and ask her are you in the mood today? Then other times she shows affection when am i happy?? Hell no. Am i fantasizing about other women? Yep. Do i still want this to work? Yes because i love her and sometimes love is very very hard.

[@knownasxristako3321]

Very well put and I totally agree.

[@gregorycarlson6632]

I am a professional who deals with this stuff all the time and you are 100 percent right in everything you said.👍

[@petroman-cg8tt]

Dont tell him it could destroy your marriage. my wife cheated on me and never told me but i found out from one of her friends years later and could not forgive her or ever trust her again.

[@Savedandfreed]

The truth isn’t what destroys marriages. It’s the lies and infidelity that do

[@john1425]

When he asks what she thinks, she immediately talks about how this is affecting her, impacting her, and what would make her feel better. This guy needs to run.

[@john1425]

@Dr. OBELA cured me Do they have a large sum of money that they need help with moving out of the country? Are they willing to give me half if I help???

[@dpeagles]

Prey much modern women

[@PropaneIsLife]

This is the worst type of person: her husband didn’t like her hanging out with that guy and told her his reason, she says nothing will happen and continues to hang out with him. Something happened and then she lies about it for months/years. BTW she’s still lying, I really doubt they only hooked up once, why would you cheat on your husband and only do it once? It wasn’t the guilt, because she’s been flirting for months…

[@wesv8743]

I'd be lying if I didn't say I clicked on this video just to see if this sounded like my wife's voice.. it's a hard gut-wrenching place to be as a husband who loves his wife in the four children she provided to us and it sucks that I even have to think about it

[@doc.cris9286]

I have a wife that “emotional cheated” my gut says otherwise. I also clicked this video hoping to not hear my wife’s voice.

[@jaws23100]

Guys I can tell you from personal experience you need to look into those feelings and confirm them or have proof it isn’t real. I felt those same feelings and denied them for months only to find out she was sliding down a slippery slope that lead to infidelity. Your instincts are telling you something is wrong in your relationship right now. Find out what it is and try to fix it before things get worse… and or discover the truth so you can work through it sooner than later. Stay strong

[@mavrk.d]

Damn this comment hurts my heart

[@johndavis7078]

Married man of 30 years here. I never even thought that someone would listen to this just to see what her voice sounds like. Damn! Sorry for those of you who did. I personally think we all need to remove all of the temptation in our lives. Just like this woman said, she was at a gym and a personal trainer started giving her attention. If she was going to this gym and her husband wasn't there with her every visit, that was a mistake for both of them. Temptation gets too many people in trouble. If temptation shows itself to you...RUN!!! If your wife wants to start something new like sign up at a gym, tell her to run! These gyms are the perfect place for temptation to push people beyond their abilities to fight against it. I know a married girl who did the exact same thing as this female caller. A gym is a bad place for married people to go. I wish all of you married dudes all the luck in the world. Help your wife run away from her temptation. And you do the same as soon as you see it. RUN FAST!!!

[@elenajewel3]

@@jaws23100I agree. Something is causing that insecurity and lack of trust. It has to be addressed or you’ll spend years stuck in a relationship where you feel icky all the time. Is that a way to live? Do you want to model being comfortable in an uncomfortable living environment to your children? Do you want this kind of relationship to be their first model of what a spousal relationship should be? You both have to decide if you’re willing to work *together* for your family, and communicate that. If you can’t trust them, if you can’t communicate with each other, you have no relationship.

[@EthanFrederick-r3z]

My wife of 15 years cheated on me multiple times. She would lie to me point blank. So scary. And convincing. And she never quit either. It so sad for the kids. If she is sincere she will move heaven and earth to gain back his trust if she don’t. He needs to go quickly

[@DayumSonny]

You already know she's downplaying what she did the moment she called what she did a 'mistake'. And with a trainer... How original. She isn't remorseful. Because although she stop cheating, she hasn't stopped deceiving her family. And she will NEVER stop. They never do.

[@Melissa.712]

And That's why you never trust them.

[@kencarling]

She wants out of the relationship. She was hoping that they would split up without destroying her reputation. Now he has stayed. She is taking it another step further. If she loved him and wanted to stay with him, she wouldn't breathe a word of her infidelity to anyone. No good will come of her telling him. She knows this

[@AS-ng5pi]

She stopped once he found out. She claims she was going to end it before, but we all know how much we can trust her honesty.

[@dorianneutre7897]

Wow, just from the very first question to know if she is married, she said "yes, that's the problem...". So to her the problem is not the affair, being unfaithful and having shown less than little integrity...it's that she has that guy at home to whom she is tethered to ? Not telling him would be robbing him of his right to know the truth and to make his own decisions, so basically betraying again, and every day for the rest of your relationship...

[@jennprescott2757]

Modern women are the WORST

[@dannyshortmusic]

She’s feeling guilty… it’s still about her.

[@ryanperreault6453]

The husband “found out”. She wasn’t sure if she should tell him. She can’t be honest to the therapist. This wasn’t an accident. This was a calculated move that she likely would have kept with if he didn’t find out. Fee awful for the kids and him.

[@ctb3343]

Yeah, she also didn’t bother to change the fact of her sleeping with him when John asked her to go back in time. She only talked about changing the way she presented herself. Females will always be approached by men and the presentation is not the dependent variable in these encounters.

[@gamer67678]

First of all why is this narc even going to therapy ? Her husband is the one who should be

[@ryanperreault6453]

@@gamer67678 they both are she said

[@grizzlybear2702]

My question is if her husband is the biological father of her children. Did he get a paternity test

[@murraybeachtel8585]

@@grizzlybear2702 Would that effect the legal claim he has over the kids? I hope not. This is her fault not theirs. My grandpa loved my mom as his own though it wasn't biological. He was the best man I ever knew.

[@dfwfence]

She has ruined the family...it will never be the same

[@gzartuche]

Got love how her first response to what would you do differently was tell him and not cheat

[@howben3544]

She's not a Good Wife, or Mother, if she was able to find Time to Cheat. Taking care of Two young Children take a lot of Time.

[@swordofthedawn6495]

Delony so soft on her compared to the dude who cheated on his wife with her stepmom. With that it was all "you're a piece of garbage", but with her it's "you're not the only one to do this"

[@hawaiidoc808]

I belong to the Kevin Samuels camp. She shouldn’t tell her husband. Why should she use the husband to get over her guilt, and thus burden him with HER guilt? She should bear the guilt for the rest of her days.

[@navarrjenkins7648]

The thing is she’s not only cheating her husband, but her kids as well. I hope she spends the rest of her life with people that treat her the same way she treated her family. Vile choices reap vile consequences; it’s only fair.

[@jhbuilders]

This always ruins peoples lives. You get caught up in a romance that you think is wonderful. Then you think about things later. It’s terrible. Things are never the same.

[@snogger6]

So interesting when people confuse the word "mistake" and "choice"

[@swackhammer2139]

She needs to tell him so he can go find a woman worth being married to.

[@Melissa.712]

why does he have to get married again? what is wrong with you people 🤦‍♂

[@bigpicturethinking5620]

Very succinctly put.

[@swackhammer2139]

@@Melissa.712 Someone said he had to get married again? News to me.

[@Melissa.712]

@@swackhammer2139 read your first comment back to yourself

[@swackhammer2139]

@@Melissa.712 Yea, "find a woman worth being married to" is not "he has to get married again". Reading can be hard at times, but hopefully that helps you.

[@urbanvoice5323]

She mentioned church like two or three times, where is the conviction for her sin, towards God for breaking her covenant? Churches have just become religious clubs for cultural Christians, esp in the UK and US.

[@Melior_Traiano]

I am a Christian myself, but the super religious people are often the most sinful people of them all. The biggest hypocrites.

[@LegalAmerican4]

It's amazing to me how they'll throw it all away for some guy, but then it's IMMEDIATELY toxic and they block them and try to get rid of them so they can keep the relationship with the guy they supposedly love

[@glendavis1266]

She simply desires a fling with another attractive guy……….yea it’s wrong but maybe a simple desire. If you shove the male ego aside look into if it’s salvageable. Maybe she wonderful in others aspects?

[@dpeagles]

​@@glendavis1266male ego? Seem its her ego. Never accept this behavior from you spouse

[@dreday77764]

If only men truely knew how deceiving women really are there would be no marriage.

[@richardbrennan2913]

I was cheated on and feel she shouldn’t have told me. Only eliminated her guilt and put the decision on me to save the marriage or not. Ultimately I left and would not have if she had carried her own burden

[@blacksquid270]

Whoa you would've preferred her to keep her cheating a secret and give you the illusion of loyalty? That's sad man, not to mention dangerous because it being kept from you won't protect you from its potential consequences, ie incurable stds, another man's child, obsessed lovers etc.

[@SK-le4lj]

Absolutely agree but only if it was a one off and not in her character

[@matinaki1644]

No darling. Cheaters who admit on their own are at least better cause they don't manipulate and are sick of their own lies, that shows remorse and emotion. The other ones who hide don't carry any burden and if they don't ever do it again it is out of fear, not love. Also, the ones who admit save you from becoming infected with something, they show they want this to stop.

[@MrAlexdimm]

Sorry, DARLING...but your condescending name calling speaks for itself. no one need read any further, to know what is on your poisoned mind. Clearing your conscience, so you feel better, because it is bothering you, is not the way to handle this type of situation. And trying to use this as a platform, to defend your own choices made in your own life, and why you have sacrificed all, to make the "responsible" decision, darling, I am here to happily tell you, you are deluding yourself, and your selfish, self indulgent, manipulative behavior shines through in every word you type. These are not confessions made for the benefit of the one who was cheated on, they are for the benefit of the cheater. To clear your own conscience, because it is bothering, YOU. But you, darling, sweetheart, honey...you feel free to twist every man you are able, around your finger and manipulate them to your decaying hearts content. Whoa be the man to fall for a woman such as you, who through her own misdeeds, feels the need to unburden herself, and force her heavy load onto the one who loves her. @@matinaki1644

[@blacksquid270]

​@@KravMaga52 @richard That's awful! What if she brings you a major STD or kids that aren't yours? Her infidelity can turn your life upside down even if she doesn't tell you.

[@filmbuffoon]

I hate it when I accidentally cheat on my spouse. It’s like I just slipped and fall inside. Ooops!

[@lindsayraines1060]

The fact that her response to his “if you could go back” question was I’d tell him up front and not I wouldn’t screw around tells you all you need to know.

[@LeonCha23]

I work at a gym and I can’t tell you how many times older married woman flirted and tried to get close with us younger fit guy. This happens pretty often so fellas be careful

[@daisylavenderlove]

Once you cheat there's no going back. The only thing you can do is be honest, take the heat, & do what your partner wants to do. There's no excuse for cheating.

[@HotTripod78]

"I was scared of losing everyone and I was just stupid" it baffles me how some people just cant say no, even when they KNOW they're about to cheat on their partner.

[@meganwhite721]

It's going to be a very difficult season in your marriage, but it's the only way to move forward by being fully open and honest and being patient with his feelings and validating them, taking full accountability for your actions and your betrayal.

[@meganwhite721]

@@luismanzanos7058 lol! who asked you?

[@topdog8678]

@@luismanzanos7058exactly, I said that before I seen your comment. I’ve cheated on my girl but ain’t no fckn way I’m going to tell her🤷🏽‍♂️

[@TeddyFreddy94]

Why do women never have any accountability when it comes to cheating?

[@wordysmith]

because in some way they always justify that the man made it happen by being emotionally unavailable, or such like, while he was out earning and ensuring the family income stream kept coming despite adversity

[@arturofederico8928]

Yes Dr. Delony she is such a strong brave woman. Please find the sarcasm in this, had this been a man you would be calling him a you know what and make him look like the bad person. She ruined her family, put doubt in her husbands mind, and ruined the kids because if he leaves we have more kids growing up in a broken family. Serves her right and she should take accountability for this without passing blame.

[@hanibarghouti99]

Totally agree

[@floridashawn7317]

Men need respect at least as much as love. She doesn’t respect her husband. I hope he finds out and divorces her. She’s scared of the consequences of her actions.

[@bobmarker6812]

Amazing how so many people refer to bad choices as "mistakes."

[@Ferrarix777]

One, yes. However, when you have a chain of bad choices... I don't know about that chief.

[@beatdown3361]

The trainer got what he wanted and then stop persuing her and it didnt work out the way she wanted it too. Thats the real reason she cut the trainer off. The husband has to move on with his life Gonna cost him a lot for her actions

[@CRL365]

She’s been lying to his face for months and is trying to avoid telling him. Truely despicable.

[@MA-jz9xt]

This doctor has more compassion for a women who say they cheat than if a guy says my wife is gaining weight he makes him feel like the devil.

[@johnmininger7472]

I don't know about that. If the 'gaining weight' call is the one I think you are talking about, I thought it was appropriate and I didn't think he made him out to be the devil even if it probably wasn't what he needed to hear. I like this guy; it wasn't necessary or helpful to excoriate her for cheating. It happened, she can't walk it back. He is trying to help them move forward.

[@apophispnw5717]

My advice would be sell your car immediately. Then I want you to get on beans and rice, rice and beans for the next 2 years.

[@JustinCase780]

your repeated joke is starting to smell like left over beans

[@Pallanos7]

@@JustinCase780 LOL!

[@andreaj8319]

🤣😂

[@scarrington]

"I found myself in an unhealthy relationship" What the heck does that mean? She hit her head, somehow got lost, and when she came to a strange dude was on top of her??? Or is that "woman speak" for "I'm a liar and a cheater who DECIDED to betray my marriage by surrendering my body to another man" Because that's how cheating is described when men do it.

[@richthepup]

There is always a market for competent men period. Let her be a single mom of two and for the streets and thank her for the opportunity to be released from this farce 🤷

[@victorias5272]

Mmm if she doesn’t want to fully commit to marriage, she may not want to fully commit to single parenthood either. What if she gives him primary custody in the divorce? Then he’s left a single father of two small kids and she only has to play mommy 4 days out the month. The rest, she gets to be single and party.

[@bigpicturethinking5620]

Yep and she can then get run through on the regular by strange and put off her nervous breakdown until 48 or so.

[@henryanaya8459]

@@victorias5272 sucks for him, seems like a win win type of thing for her

[@victorias5272]

@@henryanaya8459 exactly

[@ethannaka1822]

@@victorias5272 she’ll pay child support

[@fornos123]

The worse thing is he will not honor her like her husband has.

[@GardenerEarthGuy]

Husband should DNA test the children, the way she laughs and makes light of it- doubtful it's her first time.

[@CR1SPBAC0N]

This is the thing with the majority of Women, they want the authority of a Man, with the privileges of a Woman and the accountability of a child. Her opening up with “I was in an unhealthy relationship” is a prime example.

[@branver1172]

It’s the problem with a lot of men as well. It’s a human problem.

[@CR1SPBAC0N]

@@branver1172 negative, we’re talking about Women. This is a big issue with Women and you proved my point just now, ma’m.

[@branver1172]

@@CR1SPBAC0N how did I prove your point? How did you prove your point by repeating yourself?

[@branver1172]

@@BluegillsandBeyond *My* female behavioral patterns? I don't have to take responsibility for something I don't do. I never said some women didn't act like this. I never passed blame to another group. I said it was a human problem. That would include women, right? The thing you all are proving is that you have a "political identity" mindset, where you seem incapable of seeing people as people, but only see them as their identity group. Why else would you want me to take responsibility for things other people who happen to be my same gender do?

[@CR1SPBAC0N]

@@branver1172 this is a typical response, we’re taking about Women here, not Men. Yet you chose to add “it’s the problem with a lot of men as well” comment to deflect from the issue this whole discussion is about and dilute it to make seem as not a big problem. If you’re not that type of Women I described in my comment then this is not for you but it seems to have struck a nerve so I guess it’s safe to say this describes you to the tee thus proving my point. Your comments prove my point, if you can’t see that then you’re beyond help, frankly.

[@Reve14twelve]

My wife confessed that she cheated, she obviously blamed it on my and she was the victim. I forgave her and she just continued. There's a reason why the Bible allows divorce after adultery

[@jaws23100]

Was there any improvement when you forgave her or did you know it right away? And how did you find out the second time?

[@Reve14twelve]

@jaws23100 no improvement, it only got worst. I found out she was cheating with other men by checking her phone

[@jaws23100]

@@Reve14twelve sorry to hear that. I hope you find a way through your ordeal. Have you left?

[@Yocef80]

As a man who hate cheating and i will never forgive cheater. But as long as you regret it and you ll never do it. i suggest not to tell him. Because the harm is done and raising your kids together is more important than telling what happened.

[@richthepup]

She does NOT respect this man. There’s no saving this relationship. He needs to move on

[@dj_86]

when there is no respect, just walk away

[@anonymousdogg1559]

I don’t think she told him. Hope the dude moves on.

[@m.ramos93]

if you listen to tune of her voice in beginning " I found myself in relationship , he started talking to me". Well your job as a married women or man is to put your foot down. I once had a coworker and she made a single comment to me that I found inappropriate I made sure to tell her to distance myself. Second , she wanted this to happen. She was emotionally involved and I would bet anything there is that it wasnt " one time thing". She only said that to make her story when told not as bad. It wasnt a mistake , it was an emotional connection that she allowed and evolved

[@chrisisnice]

She doesn’t respect him he gotta leave for him and the kids. She wrecked her home plain and simple

[@Krishna_Pokharel]

Finding out your wife cheating is devastating! There’s one video I saw on KZbin husband caught wife cheating and killed her right there with knife!

[@USER_S4V4NT]

cheating should be a crime for both perpetrator and affair partner, its cruel, its detrimental to kids and family involved and it spreads. if talking about it worked it would hardly be a problem. in the world we live in alot of the time just being a decent human being isn’t a good enough reason to do the right thing, cheating is no exception and what will solve it is establishing clear boundaries and consequences for violating them.

[@johnwalker5622]

Betrayed her whole family and she'll do it again.

[@melanieb2132]

Idk. Go see a counselor to see why you cheated to begin with, then never, EVER, ever do it again.. if those demons are still there, tell him so he can divorce you. This is such a tough situation she put herself in..

[@antoinelyons5323]

Good point Melanie

[@marleneeisnor9719]

Don’t call a cheater brave

[@musiclova6368]

That’s one of the reasons I hate this guy

[@infrared9256]

The husband needs to leave her and don’t look back. She did the worse thing a wife could do

[@TheMrBigJeff]

If there’s messages then it’s not a hook up and done - it’s betraying your partner’s trust (if you’ve promised to only have eyes for one another) - also known as cheating/lying/being untrustworthy. You have to be honest. If you are not honest then you will keep lying and if you keep lying then your partner lives in a world that is LITERALLY not real. You are not protecting them by saying “it was a one time thing” - why was it a one time thing? What’s going on? Do you want to sleep around? Do you want to be in an open relationship? What’s the deal? Honestly, what’s the deal? Only, ONLY, from the place of honesty can anything be repaired or built upon with any chance of success - if you keep lying then it. will. not. work. Period.

[@gregorycarlson6632]

When John suggested what to say in telling him, what about “I’m so sorry I hurt you. Please forgive me.” 🤔🤷🏼‍♀️

[@dannyhantx]

Instead of saying she cheated, she said "I found myself in an unhealthy relationship at the gym." Accountability is women's kryptonite.

[@joyaustin6581]

You should reevaluate your circle.

[@carstuff4u942]

Haha

[@coniferous4637]

If I was married and my wife did this to me after we had kids together, she would have quite literally destroyed the rest of my life. I would have to keep living for my children despite having every desire to not exist anymore.

[@jaws23100]

That’s a real possibility, and some days it feels that, but the best outcome to shoot for is you learn to live for yourself and by default your kids get something better from you.

[@richardjackson5670]

He will probably never trust her again sadly.

[@jboreal7982]

Everyone has soul, and it’s theirs to sell in this world. My advice would be to not to sell one’s soul at all; what has always surprised me is how little most people sell theirs for.

[@jonos9467]

Imagine you are a happy married husband and you casually listen to youtube, suddenly you hear your wife.

[@Silvermoonscorpion]

I wonder about this everytime..

[@emaansalle3111]

😂😂

[@NiKtHeB0Ss]

Then you’re clearly not a happily married husband, are you? 😅

[@Hudson__scott__morris]

@@NiKtHeB0Ss not anymore

[@tsaunders4684]

I know, that would have to suck and hurt so bad.

[@zerocrutch]

She didn’t just betray her husband. She betrayed her whole family. Poor kids.

[@cennon]

Are those kids even his? He should demand a DNA test.

[@jimcole6423]

That statement is true.

[@SarahR2D2]

@@cennon So true

[@johnsmith-kt7ef]

Seriously don’t understand this, as someone who works out 5/6 days a week this is so common too. She destroys her family for a trainer who is probably running through women. As someone who has a couple friends who are trainers some of the stories they have shared with me are pretty crazy. Honestly if your a husband build a home gym for your wife. It’s crazy how many times married women have flirted with me at the gym and I am just a guy whose slightly above average looking but in great shape. This is just very common unfortunately.

[@SarahR2D2]

@@johnsmith-kt7ef It's not about you Satan is just trying to destroy what you have

[@d.barrett578]

The fact she lowkey admitted the affair only stopped because the husband found out about the messages is sickening.

[@mssophiad03]

And even then she didn’t tell him the whole truth. I hope he listens to the show and recognizes her voice.

[@user-og3jz2ev8r]

Women are disgusting. She’s probably more worried about losing his providing for her than the relationship. How she ends up stacking shelves as a single woman in her 70’s

[@goodgolly8465]

If the loser trainer made enough money to support her she would still be with the trainer and bounced on her husband. She sucks.

[@TheGrimConspiracy]

Watch fresh and fit

[@d.barrett578]

@TheGrimConspiracy I have a life and have been actually touched by a women. So I'm good.

[@drewdjv1]

As a married man - this really hurts my heart

[@avacado9689]

Yeah right!!... No good husband and No good wife deserves that!!.. ❤️

[@angelkat333]

@@ATexasPerson101Is he willing to go to couple’s counseling? If he’s not willing to work on your relationship and be honest with you, it’s time for you to leave. Life is precious and you don’t deserve to waste a single second longer with someone who disrespects you. There are good men out there who would never even dream of hurting you like that.

[@Reaper-ri6lm]

​@@ATexasPerson101 you gotta ask yourself if he told you the truth would you forgive him? If the answer is "no" then you gotta do what's best for you and your child and just leave. He'll never respect you enough to tell you the truth, much less not keep cheating on you in the future. If he thinks he got away with it once, he'll do it again. I hate cheaters, my ex wife cheated on me and didn't admit it until I caught her red handed.

[@gregorycarlson6632]

@@ATexasPerson101I’ve dealt with situations like yours professionally for over 30 years. You’re in a tough spot. I usually try to encourage people to try to work things out. But in situations like yours I advise people to get out of the relationship if at all possible.

[@lottoo5693]

Pretty naive getting married at all 50% of marriages end up in divorce and 40% of married couples are in a unhappy marriage.

[@rossmanngroup]

What the heck is this? She found herself in an unhealthy relationship? Found herself? Like she had nothing to do with engaging that relationship, starting that relationship, participating in that relationship? She just found herself there. The way I find a dollar on the floor.

[@szzk7937]

She is a horrible person Louis.

[@Ruffles2012]

Louis Rossman :D didn't know you followed Dave Ramsey

[@enjoylifeyolo73]

Nice to see you here Louis. 😁

[@adrianjeffrey2897]

It was an entanglement

[@minoozolala]

It's just a way of saying she got caught up in it. No huge deal.

[@kunya16]

"I found myself in a relationship" "He just started talking to me" "We ended up sleeping together" "I made a mistake" No accountability. At all. If she had any she'd say "I chose to cheat on my husband. It was awful and now I don't know what to do."

[@Privateryannnn]

Typical woman

[@carolinekamya2339]

sounds like narc traits

[@eyoung8215]

do you know men who say I chose to cheat on my wife. This is the lack of unaccountability in people.

[@adspur]

They never take responsibility.It’s always someone else’s fault

[@CallMeLTR]

@@eyoung8215yes all the guys I know that did something like that said it openly 😂😂 men admit it pretty easily. I have yet to hear a woman do the same.

[@nikkole9951]

Why do people refer to cheating as a “mistake”? It’s not a mistake. Cheating is a choice. You do not trip and fall and land on another man or woman’s privates. 🤦🏻‍♀️

[@Thebootyrater]

Because she wants to sound less guilty. It’s something manipulators do.

[@nolimes4u449]

I agree...but look up Ehsan Abdulaziz

[@NeccoWecco]

People can regret their bad actions. A mistake is an action or judgement that was misguided or wrong.

[@LtGrandpoobah]

"Mistake" is not synonymous with "accident." Mistakes are intentional, bad decisions which can lead to accidents. Accidents are unintentional, like the consequences from mistakes. I think you're using them interchangeably.

[@antoinelyons5323]

You are so right

[@aaroncoles2433]

He gotta get outta there. She doesn’t love him. He was just the “safe” guy.

[@truthfulpatriot9129]

yep🎤

[@manuelvalencia2828]

So what? 😂

[@makeitallgaming8396]

@@manuelvalencia2828so what? You have to be a woman. That man needs to go ahead and leave. You should NEVER be the safe guy. She should be head over heels for you other wise she will go heels over head for someone else. Just like this woman did. 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@igorlang884]

She’s for the streets end of story!

[@golfer435]

She very much does love him or this wouldn't be eating her alive

[@fullmetal_neet2288]

This woman isn’t sorry for cheating. She’s sorry she got caught. When asked what would do differently, she never said she wouldn’t have cheated.

[@naraendrareddy273]

She isn't, there's a reddit story that came out at the same time roughly that matches this story. Her comments were outrageous.

[@jim2386]

@@naraendrareddy273can you post a link?

[@naraendrareddy273]

@@jim2386 Just search "Wife cheated on husband with gym trainer reddit". It'll be the top search result

[@leeninini]

F for link

[@kimberlyreed5236]

I think it’s funny how things became “really well” in their marriage in 2 months! It went from horrible to very well in 2 months. She didn’t really get caught. She side stepped what was found out with a lie. She’s talked to people and GOOGLE and knows she’s wrong. I think she didn’t like how she got treated afterwards by the personal trainer or maybe found out she wasn’t the only one the trainer was complimenting on her form. She said she was so stupid. She thinks she’s stupid cause she realized the PT played her, not because she threw her family under the bus!

[@biancav1623]

The fact that when she was asked “if you could do this all over what would you do differently?” And she didn’t immediately say not cheat on my husband speaks VOLUMES

[@davidlatting3789]

You’d think that would’ve been her immediate response.

[@ChrissyBeTalking]

Yep. This is about her guilt. I feel bad for her husband.

[@jamilarichardson6393]

That was shocking to me too. Her answer was more about her than not hurting him. Makes me wonder how much she really loves her husband.

[@TheMasterMUF]

The only reason that she is telling him is so that she can feel better. It has nothing to do with him.

[@matthewjohnston7071]

I thought the same thing

[@jasonbourne1119]

“I was in an unhealthy relationship” I swear, these girls can’t just admit what they did.

[@AntiAshley]

Right. I wanted John to ask what she meant by that

[@jasonbourne1119]

@@AntiAshley yeah, he usually makes people clarify but I think he knew right off the bat where she was going with this.

[@andrew8168]

Hard Times create Strong Men Strong Men create Good Times Good Times create Weak Men Weak Men create Hard Times (WE are here)

[@CR1SPBAC0N]

This is the thing with the majority of Women, they want the authority of a Man, with the privileges of a Woman and the accountability of a child. Her opening up with “I was in an unhealthy relationship” is a prime example.

[@4x4cherokee]

Which relationship was she referring to as the unhealthy one? The one with her husband or the one with the family wrecker? 🤔