I Dream of Violence [A song about CPTSD and child abuse]

Tried to kill myself last week and ended up in ER. Anyways, I survived - so I'm making an album I guess.
Gender reveal? My voice doesn't make it too obvious.
Instrumental by Me
---------------------------------
Spotify link: open.spotify.com/album/7zOhqU...
Spotify channel with my other music: open.spotify.com/artist/5rtPx... ---
FREE downloads to all my releases (a donation of even 1$ will ALSO allow you to stream it from the bandcamp app - AND allow others to be able to download my stuff for free, as well): shius.bandcamp.com/

[@tairacosart668]

Your Songs hit me every time I hear them. I am happy that some people have some off the Problems I have. Even though I've been pushing these thoughts and feelings to the side. It doesn't mean I am cured... I think I shouldn't have stopped getting professional help.

[@tairacosart668]

I mean I didn't have an abusive childhood.

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

Trauma is trauma, dude. Get therapy or some sort of mental support. I tried getting off the system too - it harmed me in the long run, and now I'm at a point I NEED therapy, or I will seriously harm myself. If you can, get help.

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

つーか、日本人？？だったら同じだから草

[@tairacosart668]

@@EmbeddedSystems_Shius Thank you ^^

[@tairacosart668]

@@EmbeddedSystems_Shius I can only read some Hiragana. But not many words. I am sorry. But I am curently learning!

[@ShadowTheDemonWolf77]

This song feels like it was written about me. Despite it being bitter-sweet, it’s nice to know that someone else feels the exact same way I do. CPTSD caused by childhood trauma is truly a monster that will engulf you without help.

[@dannyp9044]

Jesus fucking christ this hit me like sack of bricks. I'm really glad you're okay even though that sounds like some crap seeing as I don't know you but still. This was just so powerful, and the lyrics really resonated. The I would never hurt you like you did me, I refuse to be like you. The feeling that what was done to you has fucked you up so much you feel the need to work even harder to "change your fate" it is terrifying. You said god is your judge, dreams of violence won't kill who I have chosen to be, wow: just every. fucking. line. Thank you for making this, stay strong.

[@dannyp9044]

Also wow listening to your stuff on Spotify and you are incredibly talented and relatable. : |

[@Vanny_12348]

how the hell do you not have many likes on this yet!? Its fucking amazing! Also the lines "I chant in bitterness the life I don't want *them* to suffer. I am my fathers daughter, but I refuse to be him. Dreams of violence won't kill who I have chosen to be" THAT HITS HARD-!

[@Sallimanderful]

Glad you're here.

[@SatishKumar-ve3oi]

i experienced physical abuse in my childhood. stuffs that i saw in school traumatized me

[@rayvenzhook2843]

I was SA'd by my older brother when I was 5 but I never said anything for a multitude of reasons so no justice was ever served. Over the years though I have grown more and more bitter and resentful that the universe would let that happen. I have watched family members abandon me in favor of connecting more with him and, yesterday I found out he's coming to visit. Needless to say, I've been going insane and songs like this ease me a little bit!

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

Christ dude. Sibling abuse is such an unfortunately common - yet overlooked form of abuse. People tend to excuse it bc "oh theyre just siblings" but abuse is still abuse. Doesn't matter who it comes from imo Best of luck dude - hope you get through that bull soon

[@michealsteven1014]

With every new song you improve

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

Thank you!!! It makes me really happy to hear that :D

[@ButlerArtz]

We hope y'all are staying strong. We hope you find peace.

[@nwocheckers]

hey i know im really late but i read the description and im glad your here

[@terrystrachan3223]

He is a god at this stuf

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

That's definitely an overstatement lol. Thanks tho, I appreciate the sentiment :)

[@st0rmky284]

You’re so underrated!

[@jademartinez2488]

Is this your song ?? Because if this is your song omg. You’re very good

[@EmbeddedSystems_Shius]

@@jademartinez2488 yeah it's my song

[@marumaru1821]

I'm so glad you're all I hope, you'll find peace and hope Please, stay strong...... for us, okey? Goodbye

[@Bertholt_UWU]

¡Es muy hermoso! ♥️👄♥️

[@EvanBear]

I felt that.

[@sonwongfox6667]

O why am I crying

[@roseliapichardo4490]

This song brings back memerios. Memerios when i was abused sexuily bt my dad for 4 years U talked know people tells me i was week and trash this songs reflects my pasf

[@delaney5721]

This song describes everything I feel

[@rachaelscherer6785]

Multiple? Lost in a singlet world?

[@spacewitchedits]

I Love this. Hit to the core. Was raised in hell.

[@hassuttassut491]

This is me every day😔

[@xurslone5513]

this song hit us like a sock with rocks in it- HARD- /POS