I Left Software. A Cautionary Story About Burnout

Writing my thoughts about burnout in software engineering, hopefully it's relatable to you as well.
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[@koma7778]

It's not 2 days to yourself. It is 2 days of cleaning, laundry, sleep and exercising to stay even remotely functional.

[@oussamak7747]

so true !!

[@safapresley]

This is what happens when you get married and you have children: a shitty life

[@enriquejaimes3368]

I would say it is more than half a day for you after taking in account a bit of resting and the anxiety starting sunday afternoon that ruins the rest of the day

[@sumayyahadetunmbi4347]

Oh

[@rejectionistmanifesto8836]

Many of us older workers feel bad we didnt do what you did when we were younger and could risk it.

[@abumetrics]

Two years ago, I resigned from my job and haven't been employed since. I exhausted my savings, made an unsuccessful attempt at starting a business, and, despite my lack of productivity during this period, I don't regret how I spent my time. I'm still uncertain about my future plans, but I find solace in the fact that I took a necessary step for my own mental well-being.

[@nawgee]

LMAO I really am in the same boat as you! (*air high five). Cheers to you friend! I was a sales engineer prior to quitting, and like you I've been living off my savings. I flipped one house during my time I've been off, and of course interest rates have made it difficult to secure new properties. Now I'm learning how to become a freelance developer and working on projects I care about! Time is the most precious asset we have. Good for you for taking care of your own mental well-being. I don't know you but I sincerely am cheering for you to live as happy of a life as you possibly can.

[@djnone8137]

I want my last check to bounce. Some of my best experiences were train jumping, greyhound riding, traveling, the people I met along the way. It doesn't make up for what it costs me for the future but I'd never trade the experience We all end up in the same place at the end. A casket

[@Lo0chdali0n360]

How is being broke and unemployed good for mental health ?

[@erwina4738]

@@djnone8137you could do all those things and post it on youtube. People making a solid living doing that and what they love

[@vspecky6681]

It's a good thing that you've found solace in your actions, but I'd still classify this as toxic positivity and would like to advise anyone reading this to not get rash inspiration and instead think before acting. It's not recommendable to drive yourself into a financially precarious position as a means to ensure your mental wellbeing, since you're just replacing one stress with another.

[@hobgoblin4614]

Bro - This is a really good video. That Manager you described - that guy in his 40s - I was/am that guy. I wish KZbin was available and I had seen a video like this one I was younger. I realized I hated what I was doing in my late 30s. I kept doing it, jumping from job to job, expecting to transition/transfer to another career path. I even went to grad school and got a graduate certificate. Guess what? My employers did not care. Some years ago I snapped. The year prior my underling coworker was not pulling his weight. I could tell something was wrong with him. He was way way way behind on a project. To get him and the team caught up I worked 21 days straight. Yes. 21 days straight. These were not your standard 8-5 days. These were mostly 15-20 hour days. That experience was horrendous. Next year I thought ok - this is the year they are going to allocate me to an ancillary project. Did they? Nope. They did not. What did I get? I ended up being assigned 5X the work I had the previous year and was laughed at when I brought up the ancillary/elective project. My thoughts were fuck it I'll turn in the same mediocre work everyone else turns in. The bosses did not like that. Long story short - I ended up with a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP) at performance year end. This was after three years of bailing the team out of multiple mishaps. Getting out of that PIP almost killed me. I ended up getting through it but it took its mental and physical toll. A few months after getting off the PIP I ended up in the ER with high blood pressure problems. I almost died. Since then I have left that company, moved to another, and was recently let go in a mass lay off. The day after I was let go I was pretty happy. Thought I no longer have to put up with this shit. That was 4 months ago and I just started looking for another job. I don't want to go back to my former line of work but still want to do something technical. Feels like pivoting when you are older is harder. That is one thing this video definitely got right. The problem with most/all companies is they don't give a shit about you or burnout. They will use all of you and then throw you out the second you are worn out and/or can get it done cheaper. Be mindful about how much you are giving. Especially if the job is not something you are passionate about. Also - doing great at work does not take the place of things that bring you personal fulfillment like dating, friends, relationships, hobbies, your personal health, eating healthy, etc. If you are eating McDonalds for every meal, like I did for months/years on end for the sake of the firm/project/company it will not do you any favors. The pipes that bring blood back to my heart are saturated with 40% plaque from that lifestyle. It will catch up with you and nobody will remember you. The thing that should be highlighted in this video is what you said about money. How you manage your money is so important. Don't go into debt and buy stupid shit. Live on less than you make so you can save. The reason you are able to take this break is because you have money saved up. It took me getting on the PIP and almost losing my job to realize I needed to get my finances together and pay off all the stupid credit card debt I had. When you have debt, and don't have money saved up, your job own you. The Master in Mastercard does not mean you are a Master. It means the bank is your master. So glad I have over a years savings when I got laid off. Otherwise I would have had to take the next job I did not want. Also - if you don't take time to cultivate relationships and date you end up alone. That is my biggest regret. Heading into 50 and not being married and not having kids sucks. Don't be me. Lastly - I found out I had high functioning and autism and ADHD. If you suspect something is wrong watch KZbin videos and see a psychologist. I wish I would have known sooner. So much of my life was wasted because I did not have this insight. I feel there are many people in tech who are neuro-diverse but just don't know it. Seek help if you do. Neuro-diversity also give you certain benefits that neuro-typicals don't have but if you are struggling it can really affect you. Thanks for the great video. Hope you find what you are looking for and others too!

[@ronh1850]

That was a wall of text, but made palatable by good paragraphing. Very good advice throughout, and I agree with much of it as a 50-something engineer. Thankfully, I made the decision early in my career to not be a ladder climber, but to instead value work life balance and enjoy hobbies. Absolutely no regret on that choice.

[@hobgoblin4614]

@@ronh1850 Thanks! - Yeah - Between the ADHD and autism things often come out verbose from me. This is what makes working in consulting/professional services difficult. They often want very short to the point answers. Most of the business/consultant types have no idea what is going on in the background and don't want to know. I think Academia would have been a cool path but the pay is bad and its hard to get in.

[@terontlewis3524]

God Damn I just read a biography, but man life ruff . Keep ya head up and don’t let your past burry your future… from what I read you perfectly qualified for a buisness in the application or even web 3 industry . You need a small team around you . Put in those same hrs on your bizz. Take a trip see grass pick up the phone for someone you haven’t talked to in a while, misery is relative.

[@hemangshrimali6308]

Bro ❤❤

[@jm7859]

I don't know how to keep relationships. Dysfunctional family. Raised by my parents using fears. They fucked up my developing years. Fucked up mentally. I'm 33 introvert and I'm lost at where I am in life. Suicide is my only option as of now. My life is crumbling before my eyes.

[@Eskinore]

Tips to Combat Burnout in Tech: - Use your vacation days more often. Use your PTO/vacation days to take off additional days around holidays. Even if you don't have any plans. - Step away from the computer as much as you can. Try to find things that you're passionate about that don't involve you sitting in front of a computer. - Surround yourself with loved ones and friends. - Spend more time doing nothing. Seriously. Take moments to do nothing and just live in the moment. Be at peace with yourself. - Spend more time in nature! Go outside! Read at the park, go for a casual walk, sit out on the patio with a friend or book, take in the fresh air around you. - Don't just live on the weekends! You have more time than you think in a day. People tend to burn out because there is an imbalance in their life from what I've seen. They tend to overwork or mismanage their time with unfulfilling activities, they are unhealthy which adds to their fatigue at work, and works got them stressed, etc. Basically, you need balance. Social, Financial, Professional, Health, and Intimacy are the five pillars I think people need to figure out how to balance to be happy and more importantly at peace. Putting too much emphasis on one could cause issues with other areas of your life. Remember, you only work in tech, your life's not about tech. :)

[@blackbriarmead1966]

I feel this. I'm feeling a kind of burnout in my last semester of CS in college. I have robotics projects, computer animation projects, and a compiler that I need to write IR optimizations for. Two are due this Sunday, and each takes a large, somewhat unpredictable amount of time. I'm also working a part time software gig at a startup remotely, and I'm applying and interviewing for my first "big boy" job. I've felt burnout before, especially towards the end of semesters, and I did not handle it as well. It's the reason I did not get any internships my sophomore year. Despite the huge workload I have, I somehow feel happy. I am thankful for those moments where I am driving, making food, eating, sleeping, playing with my cat, being with my boyfriend, etc. One thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that I only have to do school for a month or so more, and that if I don't find a job that won't be good. I can keep working at the startup as a safety net, and my boyfriend makes 40k a year so we'll survive just fine, but an extra 60-120k from my job would make a huge difference in quality of life, and together we'd be making more than all 4 of our parents currently do combined. I also stopped having alcohol altogether, as casual drinking would progress into binge drinking and cause a multitude of problems, and some illegal activities. So I only have weed now, and I can moderate myself much better with weed. I know neither is good for you, but I don't feel like I'm rolling the dice every time I have it like I did with alcohol. I'm fine with having 1 beer or some wine at a social event, but drinking at home is nothing but problems for me

[@Madferreiro]

Most importantly: stay away from fintech. Best decision of my life!!

[@HoD999x]

i use my vacation days to work on personal (coding) projects :) - if i did nothing for a few days i would get a boreout

[@iTiM50]

This. Also don’t try to save so much to achieve “financial freedom”. You’re most likely going to work the rest of your life (whether at this job or at another endeavor) so don t take such a short term approach to life. It leads to burnout. Take those cool vacations, spend money on the things that will bring you enjoyment and give back to family and friends. You only live once.

[@zachp419]

It’s everywhere. I left healthcare because of burnout. These corporations don’t understand boundaries

[@AmandaVieiraMamaesouCult]

I left education due to burnout.

[@lorbrum]

I quit my job today after being promoted to house lead only a week ago. I went from working 40-45 hours overnights to managing 120 hours each week. The stress made me lose 15lbs from not eating and not being able to sleep, my hair is thinning and falling out and eating makes me feel nauseous. My relationship at home was at jeopardy. Words of advice, quit that fucking job. No amount of pay is worth the burnout and from losing who you are outside of work.

[@hatebreeder999]

I was working for software co which actually understood boundries but then I was spending 2.5hrs in traffic commuting. I felt so sick so often that I had no option but to resign

[@higherpurpose1212]

@@lorbrum Same with me, I quit last week. The IT stress was too much for me, failling hair, insomnia, palpitations. Just not worth the job I was trying to do. I will need to find another one to get me through for another 3 to 5 years maybe, before I finally retire. Working in IT is not worth it, I fully regret being a software developer. I would be happy getting a casual pay without mental stress.

[@codecaine]

I understand that completely. I use to work for CVS and Aetna as business analytics specialist.

[@Icewind007]

As a software developer, when I burnout, I just relax. I don't care about the company anymore, and will only do absolutely bare minimum. I want them to fire me, but if they want to keep paying me to sit, I'll do just that, on youtube. Hint for employers: Don't make us work in a fckin office.

[@boratsagdiyev522]

Have you tried remote work?

[@sapitron]

wait, how could I marry the recepcionist if I work remote? it doesnt make sense.

[@johnbell1810]

@@sapitron why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free?

[@sapitron]

​@@johnbell1810at some point you would want to settle down. Both online and cold approach for meeting a woman are dead in 2023.

[@johnbell1810]

@@sapitron if you did get married, congrats! nothing wrong with that and no disrespect intended.

[@riacharda]

I totally relate with your story. I worked as a UI designer for 11 years. I wasn't progressing, wasn't challenged or given much responsibility. Each year, the goal post felt like it was moving. Younger people got promoted while I stayed at the same level. I took a product design bootcamp just before COVID because I felt my skills were behind. Years after, nothing changed. I was stuck maintaining existing features while seniors, leads and contractors took on exciting jobs. In a former role, a manager was strict on my case and always groomed me to take what I could. In the end, all that work didn't matter. When a designer left, I offered to take on some of their responsibilities and advance. I was denied opportunities and was told I'm a risk because I don't have UX experience (despite my training). That moment broke me! I lost all interest in design and I quiet quit until last Sept when I handed my notice. I self reflected and discovered I prefer bringing things to life. I learnt JS on the side then joined a bootcamp for more structure and guidance. I'm currently searching for work and living off savings. Thanks for providing these pointers. Just know you're not alone. Other career changers are out there. Others burn out too.

[@ShyShyKitty]

Being vocal and being noticed will solve all your career problems. In my experience, it matters far more than technical prowess. The other aspect that matters more is being seen doing more than everyone else.

[@aronianspigonian8589]

You both weren’t challenged, but the goalpost was moving every year?

[@riacharda]

@@ShyShyKitty I agree. Early on in my career, I put my head down, got on with work, didn't complain and hoped to be noticed (as I was taught). That built my reputation in my team, but others outside didn't know what I was capable of doing. In my second to last role, I was more vocal towards the end. As things started to change, I was laid off. My previous role, I was more vocal and ambitious but my company didn't fulfill its promise of giving me a challenge and more responsibility after my product design bootcamp.

[@riacharda]

@@aronianspigonian8589 yep. For instance, in my yearly objectives meeting my manager said "you already do a great job. In the coming months we'll be switching to Figma and need prototypes for our designs." I accepted that but asked to be responsible for a feature because I want more of a challenge to make an impact. She said she'd keep me in mind when something comes up. Months later, I learnt Figma and prototyping skills but she hired a contractor to work on new features. When I approached her about it, that's when she told me taking it on would be risky. When a promotion opportunity arose, I wasn't considered for it. A year later, my manager recommended more non impactful things to learn and achieve.

[@noswag5773]

That’s why I switch every 2 years to another company. I always have the same problem but that is because I enjoy maintaining code 😂. You are not alone ❤❤

[@blackhorseteck8381]

Some people can't work for others too long, you have to see a job as a stepping stone towards a bigger goal (potential own business). Been there many times, the best work I do is when I do it for myself unhinged and unsupervised. Hang in there bro!

[@theugobosschannel8466]

You are 1000% correct! The best work I've done is when I'm working without having to CONSTANTLY report my status update to management.

[@iorekby]

People who own their own businesses still crash and burn too. It's different sorts of stress.

[@boratsagdiyev522]

​@@iorekbyyup. Business is not for everybody either. I just accept that life is suffering but you get to choose your struggles.

[@murraysaucedo897]

Only problem to that is not everyone has the kind of “hustle” or personality to them. Also, when you “own” your business you still have a boss it’s called the customer and they can fire you whenever they want. I learned that the grass could always be greener but it will always look greener on the other side.

[@andrewanderson7912]

Yep has to be a means to an end.

[@crab-cake]

i have been a software engineer for 8 years. for several years i've wanted to quit. every day has been draining life out of me and a desire to even remain alive. i don't think i'm cut out for this society. i have thought of attempting to become a truck driver. at least then i could be on the road and away from things.

[@321Adi123]

Commericial Pilot Licence

[@Raymanujan]

HVAC. look it up.

[@ThoughtfulAl]

I've had several jobs. I started my own computer sales and repair business at the age of 36 and worked it for 12 years, there was a lot of satisfaction in fixing things for people. Then we moved a long way to a much bigger city (Christchurch NZ)and I tried to start the business again but discovered that immigrants were moving into the computer service game and they would do the work for far cheaper than I could. So after 8 months of struggle there and dozens of computer job applications and several interviews, I got a job driving trucks. I worked that for 6 years driving all over the South Island of NZ and staying 1-2 nights away each week then decided to change companies to a local driving job just around my city. Been doing this for over 6 years now so 12 years total truck driving. I don't miss IT work AT ALL.

[@Pooty_With_A_Fat_Booty]

Ugh God I'm in advanced programming concepts focused on c++ and Java. I love the work. Not the people.

[@higherpurpose1212]

Hey, I think we have the same mentality. I quit last week, being a software dev for 2 decades, I regret it, not worth the mental stress and insomnia. I dream about being a ice road trucker like that in Canada, or being a car mechanic or a house builder instead. I lost motivation to learn new tech stack, it's just full of crap and too much pressure to be on top of everything when I have life to live, not live for the company.

[@Ogtonyg]

I don't work in IT but I work as an HVAC technician. Burn out seems to be common no matter what line of work you do. We all have the same struggles.

[@MrRickeo]

Programmers are entitled by nature.

[@L4Festa]

@@MrRickeo He's entitled because he is experiencing life from the point of view of a software engineer? When was it said that only software engineers experience burnout?

[@MrRickeo]

@@L4Festa Nice strawman 👌

[@NikNeedsToStudy-fb8gr]

BS. Bro there is no overtime in Software Engineering. We don't get an money even if we worked an extra 8 hours. Can you say the same about other fields? Also we have to bring our work to home as well (company laptop) . So we can't even make an excuse if don't finish the stories on time.

[@milt0n290]

@@MrRickeoyou sound salty. You should be more entitled with your work. Idk why people are like this. We have to grind and bust our ass constantly just to stay relevant. We’re entitled because just like you probably, our higher ups have no idea what they’re asking of us and how mentally draining our line of work is but all you see is a salary but you don’t see the 16 hour days or 28 day crunch with no off days for no extra pay. When people don’t understand your point of view and only see the positives, you can become a bit cold or snarky because people who have no idea what you do try to tell you to suck it up and be greatful. I hate this for all career because it helps the race to the bottom with wages and work conditions. I always advocate for other industries employees to get their bag. Shutting up or just rolling over only makes employers more entitled. No one is more entitled than a small business owner and upper corporate management. They ask you to do more and more while lowering your salary by not keeping pace with inflation

[@NinjaVanish247]

I am a software engineer. I have good days and bad days. I am thankful to have a career that brings stability for my family. Going to the gym or doing some kind of work outs are mandatory, especially when working remotely. I hope you all find inner peace while making money. 🙏

[@La0bouchere]

Yes, the time when I experienced the most symptoms of burnout was after high school when I didn't have any obligations or a job and had the most free time possible. People vastly underestimate how much physiological things impact your wellbeing. Sleep, exercise, eating healthy, and getting outside every day are essential, and if you don't do them you should expect to have mental problems somewhere down the line. Also not planning out free time is a huge factor in misery. If time seems to be going fast, that probably isn't just work, but doing something mindless with your free time as well. Block the internet 5 days a week at home and see how much slower time goes. Not that burnout isn't a thing, but if you are feeling it well working 40-50 hours or less, there's probably other factors contributing to it too

[@NinjaVanish247]

​@@La0bouchereyou are absolutely correct. Sleep, exercise, eating healthy, and getting outside are mandatory for good health. I wasted too much time not understanding this.

[@aeremthirteen2771]

This was really douchey to read lmao

[@randomfellow1483]

Do you think a cs degree is still worth it?

[@manuelgaddala1664]

Try God. Jesus loves you and He wants to have a relationship with you. God fills that void of in your heart and give you purpose.

[@Ryhamz]

I considered getting out of software engineering at 23. I'm 30 now. This will be my last engineering role. It just never got better for me

[@mgill404pfft]

what are you going to do instead? It feels hard to find a good fit.

[@veezee__04]

What do you plan on doing now?

[@mgill404pfft]

@@IUSTITA on it. you want a link?

[@IUSTITA]

LOL! Not personally but I know you'll make it big! Pun intended. @@mgill404pfft

[@Alan.livingston]

After 20 years of coding I’ve started to segue into product management. There are other roles that you can use your experience in another way. I just got sick of the treadmill. Once every place went to some kind of agile it all became a velocity driven grind and every place seems the same.

[@turkyturky6274]

Ive been in software for about 5 years. I do everything very slow some days don't work at all. Im remote so it helps a lot. Go at your own pace, your mental health is more important than any manager or job, if it doesn't feel right leave. Obviously, save as much as you can and always have a safety net for anything life throws at you.

[@Shaojeemy]

Until you have bills to pay and no one wants to hire. I have 5 YoE. Truthfully, I left and feel better than staying but I’m still depressed because now I have bills to pay and will drown in 2 months if I don’t bounce back

[@SlavoidUkr]

@@Shaojeemythat’s why you need plenty of savings, obviously

[@northpaul3276]

​@@Shaojeemy why no one wants to hire? Should have savings to go at least 3 months without a job. Sell your car for a cheaper one, cook all meals at home, you can do it!

[@asfasfd7772]

Lol same

[@homelessrobot]

"You should have savings"... yeah thats great except if you fukn don't. Might as well tell him he should think carefully before having children. Advice about what you should do is useful. Advice about how you can be in a completely different situation isn't advice.

[@catface875]

Are there careers where burnout isn't a thing? I feel our entire culture is burnout culture. Can't escape it unless you become a monk.

[@elsunshine9976]

Nothing in this life is free... The reality is if you want money you have to work and a lot however you can use that money to build the life you want

[@petersuvara]

@@elsunshine9976value is also relative. In South America, you can buy a hotel for the price of an apartment in New York. So go figure…

[@JeffCaplan313]

Monk mode ftw!

[@erwina4738]

Working in Europe you are less likely to experience burn out

[@hettdo]

Monk, the only way out

[@Ashley-yy3de]

I also went through the same except with tech consulting. It felt like I was dead inside and I didn’t care about my job. I left my company. I was unemployed for 6 months. I did lots of stuff that I enjoyed as a child like drawing anime, stretching, going for walks, and journaling. I finally was well enough to go back to work. I’ll admit that i burnt out 2 more times after this. I realize now that contract work is better for me for the time being. When I’m not working, i paint, do pottery, go to the gym, and try to make new friends. I’ve never regretted the time I’ve spent unemployed. I’ve grown immensely and experienced more joy than i could ever hoped for. I remembered who i am and who i was as a child. I’ve played in the sand. I’ve laid in the grass and watched the trees being blown by the breeze. I’ve taken naps in the grass. I’ve connected with myself in ways I wasn’t able to as an employee. I’ve forgotten clock time and lived my days by what felt right in the moment. I’ve been blessed by this time away from the corporate infrastructure. Of course I’d love to find a career that I didn’t need a break from. Until then, I will keep doing my best and believing in myself. Listening to my heart each step of the way

[@missymc6688]

this is absolutely beautiful and i relate so much!!!! I also quit a tech consulting job and I've been unemployed for two years ( had little stints of part-time work / school in-between but quit all of those things within a few months). i literally have been enjoying many of the same things you described - drawing, writing, sitting in the grass. Connecting with my child self. Living truly in the moment. No idea what's next but just taking it day by day, listening to my heart. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and I am rooting for you!! all the best to you

[@higherpurpose1212]

@@missymc6688I did the same as both of you guys! I've been binge watching my local bollywood type movies I watched during childhood, spending time walking around strolling at malls, not thinking about anyhing else, after quitting my IT software dev job last week! I can sleep better, slowly fixing the insomnia resulting from anxiety and job pressures in IT. I want to do this for 6 months until i realize what to do next, but I dread going back into IT work, I'm too early to retire, I still want to work for another 5 years to retire happily, so for now I'll just enjoy the slow mornings and do my hobbies, go travelling and fishing.

[@clar331]

Burnout is definitely predictable in this industry, it's unfortunate and kind of unavoidable especially if you work for a big corporation. Two things that keep me going are expressing gratitude every single day and not waiting for the weekend to enjoy activities/hobbies. I get it a lot of us are tired and want to rest after work but I'm not saying you have to go out every weekday, just plan something small once a week or so and you'll feel you're living and not just looking forward to the weekends. I hope this helps anyone. With that said enjoy your time off KC 🙌

[@boratsagdiyev522]

Hello, do you have any advice for someone trying to get into front end development?

[@dfs-comedy]

I recently retired from software development after a 33-year career. What did it for me is this: Software development nowadays sucks. The Web development environment is a cluster-***k of technologies that were just thrown together. Everyone uses the latest Framework of the Week. I was lucky enough to own a small software company for 19 years, which I sold, and that was good enough for me to retire. Don't miss SW dev at all.

[@errrzarrr]

Scrum / Agile makes this even worse

[@DavidThomas-fb8bq]

Self employed sounds good.

[@higherpurpose1212]

I quit my SD job last week. It was burnt out, taken a toll on my mental health. The code base was a clusterf((k of messy legacy infrastructure where senior devs are just doing band aid jobs to upgrade it, but the core is still rubbish. Ive been into this career for 2 decades now, and I fully regret it, I should have been a builder, a mechanic or maybe a nurse. I hate learning new tech stack but no possibility of using it within the company since we're using legacy code. I developed insomnia and palpitations at night, sleeping 3 hours at the most. So I decided time to self-reflect and quit, luckily I have a bit of savings to get me through for 6 months. After this, I guess I'll have to come back and do 3 or 5 years more before I finally retire just like you. For now, I just need a decent paying job to pass the time and pay the rent, fortunately I don't have mortgage or any debt.

[@rapho8539]

I only achieved 20 years. Just like you say, it's totally not the job it was 30 years ago. One of my last projects was in a SCRUM team, where they use animal names and...lol!

[@MrAshaw83]

It's not a natural state. Definately take risks while you are younger without a family. The "risk" of just taking the "safe" path is faaar greater.

[@Dipj01]

Exactly. Very well put.

[@noswag5773]

I understand you, what bother me is that People that don’t work in tech critique us, because we are sitting on a chair “chilling”. They just don’t get it. Mental work also exhausts people 😭😭😭

[@Shay416]

Mental exhaustion is unseen and more damaging. It can take years to recover and it gonna keep happening

[@SurfyStories]

Nothing can exhaust me.. 😈

[@La0bouchere]

@@Shay416 I don't think this is true. If you feel mentally exhausted for years, it's probably due to physiological things like poor sleep, no exercise, poor diet, not going outside every day etc, or an actual mental illness that should be treated. It's extremely common for people to trash their mental health with bad physical health, then blame the cause on something else.

[@barrydaemi6287]

In fact, mental labor exhuasts the body the same as physical labor; both required physical rest to recover from.

[@adalbertthomalla4887]

It may eat your soul. I destroyed my life through this. I have an IQ of 133 if I am motivated or being under anxious Condition to perform. In my casual mood I am not quite intelligent. So I have to press my self to be in that IQ > 130 state. And exactly that destroyed my Psyche. Wrong expectations about my duty and potential in my life. And while pressing my brain into abstract thinking I left connections to real life. Just to meet expectations (own and others).

[@PoeticjusticeQueen]

I am sooo happy for you!! I quit The Big 4! I was going mental! I was at the brink of seeking psychiatry help!! My mind was turning to mush!! I jumped straight into my own business no backup plan!! The hunger in me is AWAKE!!! Corporate was killing my creativity and urge to take risks!! We only get this one life!! 🎉🎉🎉

[@Yas-hg1wi]

Same here, burned out after working in two Big 4. Traumatic experience.

[@raminbaghirov9998]

It is easy to say when you have 100k plus saving.

[@abiygirma1925]

and how are you doing now?

[@PoeticjusticeQueen]

@@Yas-hg1wi I hope you are getting better now. The stress disorder I had from The Big 4 is very real! I pray You will be ok 🙏🏽

[@PoeticjusticeQueen]

@@abiygirma1925 I am doing very well I currently do contract and freelance work and couldn’t be happier thanks so much for asking 😁! I will never go back to Big 4!

[@stoicfloor]

Thank you for sharing your story with me. We appreciate your transparency and honesty. All the best KC!

[@kristianlavigne8270]

I’ve been coding for almost 40 years since I taught myself as a 10 year old… Coding and engineering naturally becomes dull as you become experienced as you rarely get to a position where you can fully leverage you skills and feel lack of fulfilment. Besides it is mentally draining to the extreme. I used to work 3-12 months, take 3-12 months off, renting out my flat, travelling, then getting the appetite back to do another cycle. Eventually you get trapped with obligations and it gets much harder to switch horse as you get older as you are judged more. Modern work is toxic, I guess most work always has been. Such a depressing society for the worship of Mamon for the few at the top

[@redpillsatori3020]

You're lucky if you're that smart and talented that coding becomes "boring" for you

[@Lindsey_Lockwood]

hey if GPT4 can do it must not have been all that hard

[@marsdwarf]

Thank you for sharing your story. Wishing you the best of luck with your journey.

[@Myshio]

I've been in a similar spot recently I was employed for quite some time, but I just felt like I wasn't doing anything impactful with my life, I realized very quickly after reading a few successful people's stories that I needed to bet on myself if I was going tog et anywhere, recently I've saved up about 6 months worth of expenses and quit my job at 26 to bet on my own game dev career, good luck to you on this journey forward!

[@AwareNessD]

That's awesome! You got this! What type of types of games do make or plan to make? I would love to learn from you about the game development process.

[@julianubaldo5441]

I wish you luck in your journey!

[@fitfuelplanner]

You got this man, I'm also 26 (about to turn 27) and I quit my Jr. Software Dev job to build my own business. I launched a web app, iOS app, Android app, and API. My best advice is to work hard, exercise daily, and get into freelancing. Freelancing will help you make money as needed to pay for paid advertising for your games as well as not having to touch your savings as much. Best wishes bro

[@hobgoblin4614]

You go bro! If you don't look out for you nobody else will. Especially not Corporate!

[@TimCarter1]

Nothing to it but to do it regardless you have this in the bag eventually

[@lorenagonzalessaar6488]

Thanks for sharing your story with us, and hope you feel better soon!

[@mothegoat6865]

This is my first time seeing your channel. I appreciate the realness and sincerity you gave. I'm currently learning to code and its great to see the realness/downsides of the job field rather than the glamour so many other channels promote. Thank you

[@chemcell9819]

I was hospitalized and eventually laid off from my job. I'm trying to find a way now because I'm extremely burnt out from software. This message really connected with me. I still have to find a new job soon because bills, but I'm so tired. I went to Brown University and have a Masters degree in computer science.

[@tabbievon1665]

Start teaching. U could teach kids or younger ones how to code

[@InnocentiusLacrimosa]

Yeah, it really sounds like you need a sick leave. Barring that, here in the Nordics, some people make part-day or part-week contracts for various reasons. Life looks really different on a 20 hour work week (if your finances allow for that). Most of the motivation for people comes from working on something they feel is important: find organizations you want to help (perhaps NGOs if those are important for you) and apply for jobs there.

[@errrzarrr]

Out of curiosity: Agile / Scrum teams?

[@games4us132]

One advice that actually helped me overcome my many burnouts was - "remember that your software is garbage". It's funny that i was really offended to hear that for the first time, but after a while and after few feature removings and refactorings i realized that he was right. We never build perfect unicorn - like application, we always tuning and polishing it and this alone is the most frustrating thing in SD for me. I always was irritated and nervous about releases and how to improve our code, how to make it better. Someone may call this "learning" but in reality this is simply mental torture. So after some time I finally agreed that regardless of how SOLID and KISSed my code is it is still a garbage. All those code lines are just bicycle to client's ideas and will be thrown out whenever is possible and will be replaced by something else. Now I don't have any burnouts, I reached enlightenment and I don't care about software anymore.

[@avaery88]

I was an enterprise data architect and quit my job at 37 because of burnout. Found myself mentally exhausted, no longer having the energy to physically continue. It scared me that I would turn out exactly like that manager you described. Plenty of blokes at my last work place waiting to celebrate their 20, 30 or 40 years service, but always with that pained look in their eyes. Once you accrue debt, family or some other obligations tying you down, it becomes very difficult to escape. No matter what age men need to look after themselves, as we are not immune to stress related illnesses, especially in the tech industry.

[@kirill4531]

So did you pivot to smth else?

[@MarcoAshford]

That is why I at 35 still stay single, stay renting, stay frugal. Because I know one day if I burnout, I'm in my 100% shape to do whatever I want. The ideal life is have millions of savings and sitting collect 50K-100K interest each year, you have the freedom to fire any boss you want. House and kids are 2 death mark in your early life, never actively put that on your shoulder unless you really have a loyal good wife known for life long. Women that has a history met you mid life has no real interest in you, they are just looking for a provider to carry the house and kids for her, 100% no exception. Stay hard, workout, save money, everything else means jack sh!t.

[@johnsmith-ro2tw]

@@MarcoAshford you're spot on about women. But not about kids. Having a child is the greatest thing, honestly. I heard a guy once say "there is only one love, it is the love of a parent to their child". You don't know that until you have your own child, obviously. That child is what pushes you to move forward at times when you ask yourself questions about life.

[@higherpurpose1212]

@@johnsmith-ro2tw Exactly, what you said about having a child, is what I would have said too. I could retire now at age 52, with money in the bank and getting the interest to spend, but i can't because I have a daughter who needs my presence still, and I cannot be with her if I don't work and rely on my savings, because all that money will go down the drain by paying bills, rent , food petrol if there's no money coming in. I want to leave that savings to her, and for me to do that I need to work in IT still, for another 5 years, to sustain my lifestyle now and not touch the savings that's meant for her when I leave this earth. She's the only one powering me through work stress and insomnia, through the dreadful Mondays and meetings, if not for her, I could simply quit this damn IT industry and enjoy life.

[@joaojulio435]

I relate so much to you, I'm in my last year of CS. I like to code, but coding for someone else with deadlines and all those stresses turns me off. I would prefere to be completely broke, and make my own thing that I believe in than staying in a 9-5 that I don't really like and it doesn't fullfill me. Thank you so much for your history, it means a lot.

[@boratsagdiyev522]

You're describing an ideal world.

[@joaojulio435]

@@boratsagdiyev522 yes and no. It depends in what stage of life you are, if you are still young with no responsabilities you can try with almost no worries.

[@La0bouchere]

@@joaojulio435 Its also easy for tech workers to get bs jobs, though you'll have to sacrifice some pay. There's plenty of boring jobs where you only work an hour or two a day and can focus on other stuff, especially now that lots of things are remote.

[@akshatbhatt5384]

Kudos for taking such a big step 👏👏. Hope you find your way 👍🏼

[@sehoonah7756]

Thank you for sharing your story. From another software engineer, your perspective makes me feel seen :)

[@arishem555]

another thing which I want to point about US. i was told by my Chinese American colleague "I don't have friends in US. All my friends are family relatives. Even my best childhood friend moved to Houston and he never called me". This is crazy sad reality about US. Software developers getting quite a $$$$ and factor of friendshipless hitting bad. The way how neighborhoods are built not helping much at all too. I have friends who are working as software developers in Eastern and Western Europe. They are way happier fellas despite they are getting way less money and paying way higher taxes. City environment where we live affects us a lot. Imagine you are living in Houston and moving between destinations only by your car through the toll roads. And imagine you live in Rome and moving around on your lgs and enjoying whatever comes your way while you are walking. It is also part of a huge formula. But honestly, - I don't know how to restore ourselves during software/networking journey.

[@diodelvino3048]

American work-life balance is awful, in most other developed countries people dont work as many hours on average as we do( Outside of Korea or Japan, and thats pretty much caused a population decline and su*cide rate increase) and they dont have to fight for 1 week of vacation time, many people get 3-5 weeks. Corporate propaganda and Work hustle ideology is so deeply ingrained that people think youre a lazy or childish for even complaining about it. Lots of corporate propaganda implanted in the American psyche, its sickening. They cant even imagine a different life-style. We're not meant to be working ourselves to death just to finally be able to retire when we're at the tail-end of our life-span, you tell people that and again theyll call you lazy or entitled, or say its your fault for not pursuing the creation of a buisness or being a landlord just to exist comfortably. it only gets worse

[@DD-cf2iv]

It is ironic because software development is all about communication, yet US software developers often work so much that they end up not communicating with the people who matter the most. You get the big bucks in big cities like LA and Houston, but at what cost. It is hardly worth the work-life balance sucks. I want to work to live not live for work.

[@WisomofHal]

This is highly subjective and from the perspective of an immigrant working in The United States. Americans have family here, childhood friends, and relatives. They have families and absolutely no problem communicating with neighbors. As an American software developer, I’m fully comfortable working in my home country, near family and friends. Your statements lack evidence. Happiness is subjective.

[@TheMemin247]

Mexican working in the USA as a software developer here. This is 100 true, it's really hard to make friends here, while everyone likes to do small talk and say hi if they see you walking by, it's pretty hard to go past that.

[@diodelvino3048]

That MOSTLY depends on what city or state youre in. @@TheMemin247

[@Huberdoggy]

So appreciative of this video. I’ve hit the burnout wall a few times over the past 3 years. When it happens, I typically can’t so much as look at a keyboard for a few weeks. So far I’ve bounced back every time, but seems like less vigor each time. I’ll look at old programs/scripts I’ve written thinking “how did I ever have the drive to complete that?” I think I’ve endured by realizing that I need to just work on smaller maintenance projects, not try to become a SME on literally everything, and get up and do other things. Time will tell if I last though, I’m 32 now

[@DavidAKZ]

Yes, interesting. I look back at code and say, 'how the hell did I write that ?'

[@izamalcadosa2951]

Hey, KC!! I'm sorry to hear you're temporarily or permanently leaving/retiring from Software Engineering!! I hope you find your mojo or true calling in this life!! I found your channel about 3 months ago but I try to watch your newest, updated videos whenever I can!! Keep up the great work you do all the time!! I love your videos!!

[@cardbored_]

It's important to understand that Burnout isn't just caused by working a lot of hours. Working on projects that are unenjoyable, disorganized, too much WIP and unrealistic expectations from product owners and/or management will burn me out far quicker than long hours.

[@JJFlores197]

I'm not a software developer but I work in IT as an IT tech for a school district. What got me was the disorganization of the dept, mainly admin staff. We had a large project last summer where we replaced a lot of old technology - projectors and old Smart Boards with newer interactive displays. It was definitely a much needed refresh and should have been done incrementally over the years. But anyways, we installed nearly 200 displays during the summer. It was a horribly planned project and we were pretty much working day by day without knowing exactly what we were supposed to do. It wasn't always clear what rooms we were going to work on. It made an already difficult task even more frustrating. There was a lot of miscommunication: We were told to meet at a school site, but it turns out the equipment was delivered to another school. It was a massive cluster fk of insanity, mismanagement, miscommunication and a huge lack of planing.

[@coversbyrichard]

I think it’s funny how my mom and my fiancé all thought my software engineering career was magnificent because I was paid well… not realizing how miserable I was and how much I wanted to pursue other things… I’m on my sabbatical now and I’m finding it way more fulfilling helping with my fiancé’s family business.

[@GaborGubicza]

Thanks for sharing. I'm 35, a hardware engineer I went through burnout a couple of times. I can recommend a hobby / side project and also physical activity. I've been doing hardware and PCB design for about 12 years now I decided it's time for a change, I started learning coding 3-4 weeks ago. Take care everyone

[@igboman2860]

How can I get into hardware I have been doing software for years.

[@igboman2860]

I can't fucking dealing with the layoff cycles anymore to be honest

[@kirill4531]

So now you want to try the software flavor of a burnout? 😅

[@GaborGubicza]

@@kirill4531 XD no rush, I'll try it in a few years.

[@kirill4531]

@@GaborGubicza oh ok, please let me know which one you liked the most 😁

[@oluwatosinsolarin5238]

Thanks for sharing this KC, I feel like your tech contents are relatable and less obscure. They help.

[@NatashaJRiley]

You will probably never meet me, know me or understand how much I NEEDED this exact video (I quit too...same place...so many of the same reasons). Thank you for your transparency! 💯 and all the best to you in your journey forward ✨️

[@Silentstrike46x]

Very interesting video, thank you for sharing! Felt quite haunting hearing you describe your last job where you were feeling exhausted, despite everything being 'perfect', because that's exactly how I've been feeling this year. Finally got a good worklife balance (8-5, no more late nights or overtime), been going to the gym for a year, healthier, happy relationship, work is fun and I'm enjoying it, and yet... I feel more burnt out now with my 40-hour workweek than I did when I was working 70+hours at university. There's no reason I should be struggling, and yet... I am. This is the first video I've seen where someone explained my situation so perfectly.

[@hoyinli7462]

Here awaiting your next video KC! Thx for your content!

[@shafeenmahmud8850]

Love you man. Thanks for the content.

[@heidicheung6068]

Hi KC, found this channel in the midst of job searching in UX and stayed for the authenticity. Its refreshing to learn how one navigates through career with such honest, emotionally intelligent narratives like yours. Tech industry or not we need more of them. Thank you

[@eggjewla]

Thank you so much for this story, means a lot to someone like me who left tech because the software engineering path seems extreme at the moment. Health is most important of all and when our body gives us signals we must follow them!

[@KevinNaughtonJr]

happy you're prioritizing your health Kevin! excited to see what you do next :)

[@hankkim3]

Thanks for sharing your story. I can definitely relate. A lot of expectations and a lot of frustrations when expectations aren't being met.

[@christian_vega]

Respect bro, it takes courage to open up like this. wishing you success and growth in these coming weeks and months 🙌🏽

[@MultiShiv19]

I'm 28 too and in a similar situation in life. Been working for a product company for 5 years and recently found out that I am about to be laid off. Thanks for making this video. It was very relatable. I would highly recommend hobbies with which you can meet people. In my case it was hiking and running. Having a life outside of work is really important to be sane. All the best mate!

[@garrett6118]

Thanks for this video man. Love your words on risk and just life in general.

[@zeebruh5183]

This was such a beautiful video. I really admire how you focused less on the “next” and more on the benefit now. Thank you so much for sharing and looking forward to helping others going through similar situations. As a CS major-no as a young adult scared of being calcified in our modern work culture, the best thing I did for myself was start therapy. Most importantly, realizing that taking breaks and listening to that subconscious fatigue is not giving up it is a journey to equilibrium. A reminder that our comfort in the present is just as important as the future.

[@roza4778]

I felt this exactly a few months ago. Hence why I've since transferred away from being a dev. Trying out sales engineering now where it's more client facing. Not sure if it's going to work out yet but better to try something different than being stuck somewhere I couldn't be anymore. Good luck on your journey 😊

[@boratsagdiyev522]

Are you comfortable working on commission?

[@markusfeljofsen8345]

Extremely important video! Especially for software engineers but also for anyone else. A burnout is very severe and it takes years to recover. If you haven’t been affected you can’t really understand and believe this can never happen to you. That’s why it’s often too late once you realize. The feeling of a burnout is insane and you wish that one nobody. May everyone find a way and chance to heal.

[@maosiyu1328]

It is not deniable that software job pays well and it offers "reliable" life as people always talking about. Me as a software engineer for having more than 3 years experience, and working in a big tech for almost 1 year and 3 months, feeling depressed and having huge anxiety in the last 7 months. It makes me questioning on what is the purpose of earning money since I don't have time and energy to enjoy my life anymore. And it requests a huge amount courage to quit or leave this industrial, and still having a "happy" life. Thank you for sharing the thoughts, I can really related to it.

[@jazilzaim]

Amazing video! Thank you for sharing the downside of working in tech as well and for being fully transparent! I hope you are doing fully well and wish you a fantastic recovery! Tech has a lot of the upsides but the downsides such as burnouts are not as spoken about which I think should be addressed as well.

[@YourChicGeek]

Whooo this video resonated with my soul! I worked in Tech for a longggggg time and went through the same thing. I finally made the switch to a job that didn't pay as much but gave me a better quality of life. Once you reach a certain age, you will start to look at a lot of things differently. Wishing you well in your future endeavors.

[@cindysanchez2987]

What job did you switch to

[@hawkkim1974]

Been here in this industry for more than 25 years. I don't know if it's me or the industry itself, but anyway I'm done. I don't wanna do this job for my living anymore. Some parts of this industry are still fun to me, but they are nothing but a hobby level fun for me anyway. What am I gonna do for my living? I have absolutely no idea. One thing I'm sure is I don't wanna be miserable everyday locked up in the small cube, dealing with all kinds of, mmmm what's the best word for it here, I don't know. Anyway I'm done. I wanna be in peace and happy for the rest of this short life.

[@AIdrivenabundance]

Thank you so much for sharing your story! It really helps me see things with other perspective. Almost 1 year passed since my own burnout in IT/tech and still I feel I am not 100% healed. But I have drawn a lot of courage from your own shared experience, because I also believe everyone has their own capacity of dealing with stress and deadlines.

[@mfernandez1191]

Thank you for this video. I'm going through exactly what you described in this video and it's comforting knowing others are going through the same thing.

[@alan_1213]

This happens when you make your job your purpose

[@kokorospirit5006]

Touché

[@BonBonShrimp]

I should say that you are very wise for your age and understand yourself very well. I'm in my forties, hardware engineer, worked in silicon valley companies for several years. I've had incidents of burnout in the past, but had no other option but to continue working. Then when my daughter was born about 5 years ago, I quit my job just to relax and spend more time with family. It was great. I was also doing an MBA at that time just to keep myself busy. Anyway, then I started looking for jobs after almost a year and half and found one immediately. I worked there for over 2 years, but got laid off earlier this year. I am taking a few months off and will start looking for another job soon. As you mentioned, resting and taking time off are extremely important. I value my mental peace and feeling of well-being a lot more now than my paycheck. Like you, I love engineering and problem solving, but not the stress, deadlines and politics. Can totally relate with the video. Good luck!

[@marcrofes5731]

Thanks a lot for your video, it helps a lot to all of us, I think that including those people that now dont know or perceive what burnout really feels like

[@kofestar]

Thank you for this video. For a long time i didn't understand what i was feeling but this video put everything together for me. From your thought process to the breakdown to the feeling of being sick and needing to lie down for a few hours. Sometimes i get overwhelmed with this feeling just from a single meeting and i didnt understand why. Going to the gym helped a bit but im still pushing through.

[@PivotGuy401]

Been in software for 3 years, I don't regret it and my latest company is probably the best I can find at the moment. Once I pay my debts and save enough, I feel like I will be able to take a big risk doing something completely different that I'm passionate about

[@iris-tabea]

I feel everything you are saying so much. I was in the exact same situation, I was completely burnt out but at the same time I was working my absolute dream job in software engineering which I would have done anything for a few years ago. I didn't want to seem ungrateful and so I pushed forward. A couple months later I completely broke down in front of my coworkers during multiple one-on-ones. That's when I decided I need to change something and quit. I am taking a few months off now to work on my mental health and just get to a point where I feel excited about my life again. Thank you so much for creating this video, I wish more people would talk about this ♥

[@cmpunk9738]

how much years you have worked like Softaware inginering?

[@arishem555]

I was CTO of netflix-like startup in my own country back in time. It was small company but we tried to build big things. So I had developers in my team and one of them told me "I cannot do this anymore". And his explanation was "I am doing lots of things and I am not seeing any result". So his qualification of burnout was that he is producing something which he cannot touch or feel results of his work. For example if farmer harvesting cabbage potatoes and cucumbers, - he is holding those veggies in his hands and he is processing them later into great meals. And then while you are eating them - you are nourishing your body and refilling it with some vitamins, minerals and so on. You kinda feeling this cycle. Right, - by doing IT job you can go to grocery and buying organic food. But this is wholy-guiacamolly different topic. Cause it is most likely not labelled the proper way.

[@sondertt2220]

Sorry about what happened. I hope your dev friends are doing better now :)

[@MH-kj8zs]

Trust me - "this cycle" SUCKS. Do you even know how many hellish jobs like that exist ? You probably dont want to work there. It looks like this: you do exactly the same repetitive action over and over again. You see result but there is no end. I had blue collar works, I had engineering jobs and I was dev intern. I have comparasion. As student I had to give my best in blue collar work to earn miserable money (really ?). In engineering jobs everything and everytime is in constant chaotic state which you need bring down. Wow good luck with quality assurance vs client vs your boss vs production. As dev i saw opportunity to grow, salary perspective was way better, but then my company told me there was no project for me anymore and fired me. Like really - EVERY full time job sucks in some way or another. You need to have passion to not burn out. I saw tons of bored to death people who begs for weekend and holiday. Purpose of every job needs to be: 1) give money (duh) 2) not that toxic. It's just everybody has different opinion about every job position. We are designed in this system to burn out. People without passion will be eventually bored and stressed in any kind of job.

[@arishem555]

@@MH-kj8zs I was working in construction jobs not that long time ago. I didn't speak English much and I won't be able to return to IT yet. So I needed to be electrician for some time and a bit later low voltage installer. To say that I went there through the Hell, - is nothing. I was humiliated countless times by my colleagues. Some of the bosses yelled at me for no reason much and they wanted me to do my job faster whenever they still were paying me 12-15$ per hour. One of those bosses in the grave already. Another boss drinking quite often for the last 5y. Those people achieved nothing in their life and still were in control of life of others. There is always a way in those construction jobs out of that routine, - to start your own company and do slowly project after project. So I can say as well that I went through different jobs on different levels in my life. And I can tell, - that this crap we have in IT, - you cannot compare to blue collar jobs. You can fight back to those people while you are blue collar, - but you cannot do anything much in IT. I don't know how to explain, - but IT job is burning everything inside. Did you see any IT dude happy in instagram? How many of those there? Like minimal I'd say. And how many people out there some of them are bloggers, some youtubers and some of them just making content for fun. They kinda can enjoy their life the way it is. I am right now in a quite small team around me of 10 people. I can tell everyone is burn out. What is different about my team, - they all kinda have families and trying to keep with what is happening with them. Their families kinda keeping them afloat. Plus they almost all of them are going to church (not long time ago I didn't know that so many people are going to church in US). Unofrtunately I didn't find my family. I'm gay, I'm picky, I'm IT dude. I'm looking good, smart and so on. But this is also doesn't help. Not sure what is next. But maybe I need to downshift 2nd time in my life and move somewhere away. Or I need to find a way to be happy in US.

[@aliAbdilah]

Thanks sir, I think you point out the core reason of my current burnout. Just that idk what to do with it @arishem555

[@johnbell1810]

who doesn't enjoy holding their cucumber in their hands?

[@eduard289]

Thank you a lot for your experience. This is a very great source of knowledge. Thx.

[@maxirodriguez8376]

I was so used to be so proud of staying whole nights to finish deliverables. I had to wait almost ten years to realize it was about my curiosity and will to demonstrate I had passion. Instead of enjoying that passion, I was more into showing it. I used to feel that joy of seeing how the clients would see me after having me whole nights and extra hours there, working without asking too much questions. Now I´m 35, and I see I need to change a lot. Sometimes I cannot even focus for more than 10 minutes and need to rest a little to continue. It is really good to see this kind of videos, because we need to fix this. We cannot let this "productivity chaos" to drain all of our energy. We have time. We can be really productive, but at the same time, alive. We can be the best in our fields and happy at the same time. We need balance. Thanks for the video! I hope you are better than ever!

[@berbearlol]

Thanks for this. I could have made a similar video. I made it to the management layer and then not only had to deal with my burn out... I was managing an entire team of burn outs. I realized the problems of the industry go waaaay deeper than the individual. There's something about the endless todo that grinds away at people. Software can be very abstracted from your daily life. It can feel very Sisyphean.

[@JeffCaplan313]

💯 Software is eating the world. The West is a death cult. How's your love life? Ask "micro soft".

[@mayorityz]

You know, I’m about 10years into tech now. I started feeling tired about 2 and a half years ago. It was a remote job that paid really well and higher than I could had ever hoped at the time. But I was dying after about 8 months. I was also my fault, I had been struggling with bad jobs for years, and while I felt lucky I had this job. I took on another lesser paying one, at a physical location. I wanted to be safe, in case I lost the remote one. I soon had to quit the remote one even with the higher pay. I just couldn’t keep up. I wanted to do nothing. I hated my ide, I hated running my apps. I got lucky after I quit, the second job raised my salary to match that of the one I left. 2 years later, I am just tired mentally. I want to sleep for a long time and do nothing. I have saved a year’s worth of my living expenses. But where I come from, you may not get a job when you return. The only thing that gives me joy, is experimenting on my own ideas and projects. In fact, this is what got me into software. To just play and build fun things. Now, it’s just headaches and back pain. I really wish to change careers, but to what?

[@herono-4292]

Seems a little hard to find equilibrium

[@gtrbarbarian]

I've feel for you and have been there bro...a couple of times over 30 years. I think in the software space it going to be more common to take 'career breaks' ...because it can be a grind. There are companies that are family oriented, as in family owned, by good people. Find them via networking and asking the hard questions during the interview process. Red flags are almost always apparent. Many in the industry, while still capitalists, are starting to realize that burn and churn is more expensive (via attrition) than it is to treat folks as the talented humans they are, pay them and train them well..have reasonable schedules and work life balance...and keep people for decades. It took me 20 years to find that though! And if this career doesn't float your boat, that is ok, it's not a reflection on your value as a human being.

[@xanizdev]

Two years ago i quit my job as a Software Developer. I felt that if i kept on going i would kill myself. The day i quit i felt relief. For two years now i clean windows for a living. I open'd my company and enjoy every single day in my life. Sometimes i think about getting back into SD, but depression and stress kick back in. I never stop'd coding and learning new technologies, its just the tought of having tight schedule, being press'd on and constant fear of being laid off is just not worth it. Even tho many people don't get us and think that we drink coffee all day and sit on our butts, i feel you brother. I know the pain that you are in.

[@tylenol_interlude]

I needed this video. After suffering another burnout, im making the change out of software, into QA, and in the future, something else. Thank you so much

[@billbill3709]

You’re taking a huge step towards fulfillment and happiness. Self actualization and a sense of purpose. Most don’t get to that point. If you can help people by telling them the solution to your own problems you had, you will get far and it will feel amazing.

[@BotcherRyu]

amazing video. i needed to hear this. thank you for sharing your views.

[@Big_aaron20]

man great video feeling this in college my senior year. I really want to try new things while young

[@davidmelin1159]

I can really relate to this, i started as a software developer 2 years ago, and in the beginning i was so excited about everything i wanted to learn about everything it was new....later it turned out the motivation was dropping, demand was increasing and collegues started quitting and eventually i had no motivation left and got burned out .. i hope to get my motivation back some point in my life but right now i feel i would be happier making coffee at starbucks hehe

[@ananthepan2424]

keep going man, we will be rooting for you!

[@satinbostic3836]

I needed to hear this. Thank you for sharing.

[@aram5642]

An incredibly valuable and resonating story. Thanks for sharing!

[@slacktronic6587]

The rat race is real. It saddens me to hear stories like this. Only 28! I spent all my 20s on life experiences, taking risks, seeing the world. I will never ever regret it.

[@litote9]

You might if you find yourself homeless.

[@user-ce9eb3tv9r]

nobody asked

[@hobgoblin4614]

What you did in your 20s needs to be advocated way more by "adults". I did the opposite of you, am nearing 50, and wish I had done that. Adults are way to quick to tell young people to saddle up with things like car debt and getting into the real world vs. figuring out who they are and experiencing what the world has to offer and finding themselves along the way. That is what life is about and should be embraced.

[@slacktronic6587]

@@litote9 That is very true, the economy is really different than when I was younger and I feel for young adults right now. It also takes a certain amount of privilege to chase life experience. Poverty is fluid and one can flow in and out of it. I spent a good portion of my younger years fluctuating that in that space. I think the thing that saddens me the most is that younger people are not given the opportunity to chase life experience, they are entering the work force and getting burnt out by the age of 28. It's not their fault, but the fault of the world we have created. We can never reclaim time.

[@mark1542]

@@slacktronic6587very sad indeed. Can I ask how you afforded to live in your 20s like that? Currently 23 and stuff is crazy expensive

[@Soldknight324]

No matter what you do in life you're going to run into the same issues. If you 10x your KZbin enough to make it your main gig, you'll become beholden to your subscribers and feel the need for consistent uploads and quality content. There's only so many videos that can be made on software & the like that is able to engage and hold an audience. Good on you for taking lead of your own destiny but the grass is not greener, and often it is much the same.

[@Xerion567]

Thanks for this video. I share many of the same feelings and can relate. For now I keep going and plan a graceful exit strategy.

[@tasnadian]

thank you for this video, it's given me lots to think about how i might make changes in my own life/career. this cuts across many industries - i'm an emergency medicine doctor and can still find so much to relate to in your descriptions of burn out

[@therealjordiano]

The thing you mentioned briefly about time just rushing by, that stood out to me, I have had that feeling before and its pretty scary. I remember that sense that there's just too much going on, too many problems to be solved, and gradually the weeks just slip by like they are nothing, suddenly a year goes by and barely anything of note has happened in your life I feel for you in the interview there bro that must've hurt, but hey I suppose these things enlightened you to the dangers of burnout. I had a similar experience very recently where i just felt like i was burning out and that I would lose my mind, so decided to just resign and fix my life, even if that comes at a temporary cost to the career. I am now in a strange position where I am between jobs, about to go to back into that world, wondering whether I should, but not really seeing any viable alternatives that I could go for. I don't want to start from scratch again because going into programming was already me starting from scratch and letting go of 4 years of unrelated university experience. ah well, hopefully i'll figure it out thanks for the video also

[@oshawastaken]

this is awesome. You only live once, you are inspiring brother. Been feeling the same way in my journey in compsci, taking a step back atm from the constant job apps, assignments, etc.,.. thank you for this video.

[@AustinGarcia-Color]

Wow thanks for sharing this. This is relatable on so many levels.

[@ihayun.m5874]

Wow, I literally just cried out of nowhere yesterday and after watching your video, I can start thinking and reflecting that it might be due to my busy daily life where I always have full schedule on weekdays and sometimes not even able to get a good quality sleep. Thank you for sharing!

[@arthur-zhuk]

A lot of the background and introspection is irrelevant in my experience. It really comes down to your subconscious communicating to you via burnout signals/depression that working in tech/software isn't returning enough rewards to justify continuing. These traditional software companies really over stepped their bounds when it comes to squeezing engineers for every drop of effort/creativity for the least amount of pay they can possibly get away with.

[@aronianspigonian8589]

Meh, that’s most industries if not all in america. Welcome to adulting

[@mariedrapalova7365]

Sir, we are getting paid top dollar. What do you mean by least amount of pay? people are making 300k+ a year and are working in very healthy conditions like air conditioned room with coffee and lunches on site. Maybe its my years of hard blue collar job that paid 16k a year that just makes me not see what you are seeing.

[@boratsagdiyev522]

​@@mariedrapalova7365300k what kinda developer are u?

[@La0bouchere]

I don't think so, software engineering is virtually the easiest field to quit and find a new job, pretty much anywhere in the world. In my experience it's trivial to find comfortable jobs and negotiate for whatever conditions you want. EG, about a dozen of my friends have gone to 4 days a week just by asking, two have even gone to 3 days a week. Most are fully remote as well. People who think they're stuck in a bad roll in tech are either: - trapped to an absurd salary due to lifestyle inflation - never confront their boss to negotiate - never try quitting and finding a better job

[@agharoshaankhan5056]

As an intern DevOps engineer, I can fully relate, working on different tools and learning new things everyday man that feels like a burden sometimes. For me the longer I get to learn new tech the more depressed I get because of thing that, if I don't get to learn the job description in less time I won't be able to secure a job. I have zero activities other than working and learning. And because of that, I wasn't able to work for 2 weeks straight. yes I want to work and learn new stuff but then maybe I'm pushing myself too hard and being stressed about it is maybe the major reason for my burnout.

[@rodney5269]

dude i get paid 70 grand a year to be a teacher in stem at a charter school, it so chill, because I am teaching stuff I know already, and besides managing some trouble makers occasionally, it is such a stress free job. My lesson plans are already developed, all I have to do when I come home from work is develop different methods and lesson plans for the kids that are struggling more, so I dont end up failing half the class or something. Other than that I get so much free time to enjoy my life and do other things. At 70 grand, I am sure I am making more than some software developers and not getting burned out and stressed out like they are. I coded in college and it is freaking tedious, I remember always sleeping very late trying to get my code to work for a project. Imagine that for a job 365 days a year. No way. Quality of life goes down and the money just isnt worth it. It is even worse when the pay is not even more than easier and less stressful jobs. I have an engineering degree, and solving engineering problems is less stressful than sitting in front of a computer debugging lines and lines of codes. When I was with engineering company, I can just take my ipad and go for walk at the while thinking about the engineering problem, grab a drink and stuff. I dont have to sit in front of my computer for my work. With software u are glued to the seat probably 8-10 hours a day to finish your work.

[@WisomofHal]

This was painful to read. While I make about triple your salary, I also live in a very expensive part of the country. Paying bills is driving me insane, “less is more”, is starting to make a whole lot of sense. Debugging code is tedious, at times I just have to get up and remove myself from the problem. Half the time, it’s not because the code is unsolvable or hard… it’s because I just don’t want to rewrite x files to implement some perfect. Early in my career I wrote a recursive function which I tested the hell out of, after spending so much time to be cute and artsy. I look back and wonder how my team reviewed that code and passed it to production. I figured they just checked that it worked and was too lazy to try to actually understand it. Now I understand then and I try to write the least amount of lines of code as possible and I take more time to think about implementation because refactoring or hunting down a bug is a pain in the butt. I feel I am on a repeat cycle of becoming proficient on some new technology every 2-3 months and I’m often jealous of my buddies who can come home and relax and pick back up the next day. There’s so much software, so much code, so many frameworks, patterns, solutions, methods……….. that you must know or else you’re not worth your salt. But I continue because of the fear of becoming obsolete and out of touch. I’m on 32 wtf.

[@aronianspigonian8589]

@@rodney5269teaching for 99% of people is a horrible pay, high stress job. You are absolutely not in the majority or even close to it. Your story may mislead people, so I went ahead and added that disclaimer for others who could be naive to the field. Teaching is not some chill job for most where they just make $70k. Most take 20-25 years to make up to $70k. Have a good one!

[@boratsagdiyev522]

​@@WisomofHalthat fear is definitely a motivator and I'm just starting out.

[@DavidAKZ]

​@WisomofHal what do you think about chatGPT passing Google coding interviews and aceing it ?

[@DaveTansley]

Thanks for sharing your story, it resonates. I've been in software engineering for 23 years, and I've experienced those deep pits you describe on a few occasions. It's not a great feeling. I was luckily able to pull myself out of them, as they were generally project related. But I feel that there is something deeply broken about software development. I sometimes feel that the estimates I give are estimates to make something "just work" rather than "work well". This is because of unrealistic deadlines and pressure to meet them. Of course, something that "just works" often doesn't, and the post-go-live firefighting adds to the cycle of stress. As I've got older, and become more financially stable, I've found it easier to tell the truth. It's harder to browbeat me into lowballing an estimate these days. I'll give a range - what it'll take to just get it done, and what it'll take to get it done properly. Let someone else decide what we're going to deliver. I've found this helps a lot. Hope you find what you're looking for!

[@ChrisAreDumb]

your videos are on another level of quality and insight. keep it up

[@niccolotoccane3041]

Thank you for your words, hope you’ll find what you are looking for!

[@JavierHernandez-xo5nb]

Que buena anecdota. Yo vengo de otra industria donde me sentia aburrido con lo que hacia y ahora de lleno me e metido a la programacion. La verdad es que el tiempo se me va volando y e aprendido mucho y siento que estoy en la primera parte de tu relato.....Y como dices aun amas programar . Voy a tener presente eso para no desender a un burn out seguro ..... Gracias por compartir.

[@arishem555]

Another thing which hit from your video about mortgages. I kinda partially went into this US cycle of buying nice car, house, installing solar panels. I didn't go for something crazy. But still I did it. I had one situation related to my parents and siblings because they were misplaced by the war. I was expecting they gonna come to US. But they never came (didn't want to). So I'm dowsizing and selling one of the cars and want to close solar credit ASAP and probably then pay out more for the house. I understood that I don't need much things to be happy. What is most important, - that we need to keep that strategy of owning less and thinking what we can do in our lives to become better ones. The whole point here is that we don't want to fix our hole in the soul caused by burnout by buying some things which we might thing will make happy us. they won't. never. don't even go there folks.

[@conradmbugua9098]

Aren't you saving on the electric bill by using solar?

[@arishem555]

@@conradmbugua9098 LOL :-). Maybe in California ... My monthly payment for solar in texas $450. My bills were $150-200. Okay, - I've got 30% tax credit, - so you can down my payment to $300. But, - nobody telling you when they are selling, - that system can break any time and not produce anything at all. And it can take months to fix. Who gonna compensate? Nobody. Another thing, - hurricanes and disasters. if something gonna happen to your roof cause of high winds, - you would need to take your panels down, repair roof, repait plywood, put new shingles, install solar again. It is like double job. I am for sure appreciate having solar instead of gas generator, it is way better. But all those issues about solar nobody gonna tell you never. If I would do solar again, - I would probably go with small array 4kWh instead of 12 and two powerwalls. Why? Because we have here free nights plan. Again not sure how those free nights gonna exist in the future or not. They might cancel this plan any time. I contracted it only for 2 years. with my 50k installation I have now literally unlimited power.

[@neo_aliaga]

I agree with you 100% Material stuff won't make you truely happy. It's just temporary happiness after all.

[@La0bouchere]

Another thing, renting and investing in an index fund is better financially in the majority of cases, while also providing you with much more freedom. People need to know that they don't need to buy a house and should only do so if they truly want to.

[@Zeioth]

You awesome for having the courage of doing that. I love software development and I've contributed to 100+ open source projects. I've also worked for several international companies. And often I ask myself if it's actually worth to go through so much bullshit just to have a salary most other people achieve with 1/10 the effort.

[@iemp7165]

Honestly man, I'm in a general IT/software job and I feel it too. It's more of the fact that I have to spend so much extra time outside of work in order to be ready for work. I have to get ready in the morning, make my lunches/breakfast for the week, the commute to and from, getting things done the night before so I have less things to do in the morning. I don't even get 2 days to not do that, because I have to spend Sunday evening getting ready for the week. Top it off with the fact that 9-5 isn't a real thing anymore, it's actually 8-5 with an hour lunch. So, I'm pretty much "locked" into work for 9 hours every day, PLUS all the extra stuff I do to be prepared for work that maybe adds 1-2 hours. With a healthy 8-hour sleep schedule so I'm well rested for work, that puts me at 18-20 hours in use every day leaving me 4-6 hours for myself daily. It's just not enough time to decompress before I have to repeat the same thing over and over for 5 days. And don't get me wrong, I love my job/field and love what I do. I just don't want to dedicate the majority of my time towards work.

[@syrus1233]

Hey man I’m an electrician that makes 120k a year. I’m thinking of going into software engineering. I never work weekends or more than 8 hours. So I want to know. What work do u actually do outside of work? I geuss with the trades you never are expected to build a circuit board at home evrything at work stays at work.

[@iemp7165]

@@syrus1233 Oh sorry, I didn't mean I was doing work for my job outside of those 8 hours. I was more talking about all the general life stuff I have to do so that I'm ready for work. The menial stuff like making my lunches for the week, the commute, getting ready in the morning, etc.

[@johnyewtube2286]

@syrus1233 Why are you switching careers? Most software development jobs will not start at anything near 120k unless you live in the sillycon valley.

[@jzero3g]

I hope you are seeking help on a mental/emotional level as part of your recovery for burnout. Hope everything will be ok for you

[@yuraneroba66]

During the video I was shaking my head, like it's resonate with me so much... Thanks for the video ❤

[@user-xe5bl5fi8n]

Thank you for sharing your life experience, for allowing others to relate - to us actually being humans who aren't meant to be burnt-out repetitive machines.Our whole work/life construct - the world is toxic and unnecessary in this grind.

[@computer-training-for-seniors]

Software development, if you really love what you do, as I do, is better done as a freelance. Working for a company is extremely taxing on your mind in this field.

[@parthsavyasachi9348]

Different type of stress but yes better than working in a company.

[@tochukwueziokwu47]

Completely agree. Atleast you work at your own time and pace.

[@computer-training-for-seniors]

@@NRGY Google it for your area.