I Love You Mom | Beersos #78

[@sophianarvaez7854]

timestamps 0:56 derek is not a milf hunter 3:44 derek wants his mom to ... 14:49 derek's mom's bf is a meat tornado 19:04 nico used a big brained strategy 24:44 nico cannot look his mom in the eye 28:56 derek is surprised that his mom was not controlling 40:48 derek mandarin 😍 46:10 nico has not smiled in front of his mom in at least five years 55:38 derek did not wash his hands until he was twelve 1:01:35 derek's mom cooked nico

[@beersospodcast]

doing gods work

[@ThatLibraryShow]

I remember seeing a tik tok saying "Remember, it's your moms first time living life as well." and it really changed my perspective.

[@0x978]

four minutes in and I am hearing about your desire for your mother do be dicked down well. Never change.

[@hannahv7846]

I understand Derek so much when he says ‘having abuse in the home is embarassing’. Before my parents split our house was an actual hellhole and I didn’t tell a single one of my best friends about it. Once they split my friends were confused and saying things like ‘oh did it come as a surprise’. Although I know I shouldn’t be embarassed or ashamed, it just seems like an out of place thing to share especially when there is nothing for anyone to do about it

[@mahaliacuizon8537]

i agree its totally embarassing

[@eileenc65]

same it’s awkward bc no one you confide in relates so it’s super out of place

[@bbmurta6680]

It is soo embarrasing (especially bc we know we shouldnt feel embarassed). I think its bc we know that as soon as we tell someone ab it they will hate our abusive parent, and we dont want that, bc although were being abused by that parent we also love them, somehow. (We've been through good moments with them and that doesnt let us hate them as much as we should). Its also "so embarassing" to think admit that you dont have a perfect family. The thought of not having a perfect family for some reason makes you feel lesser then.

[@sea_of_love]

it does feel embarassing bcs u feel like the odd one out amongst your friends

[@hyliaeldin]

Took me 29 years to be the first to hug my mom and tell her I love her first. She had to move in with me after finally leaving her toxic second marriage and we've had plenty of healing while living together. Love you boys! Shoutout to all my rocky mother relationships out there! ❤

[@jalieclark2719]

I love that you guys are so open about all your family stuff, and that you really listen and try to understand each other. Being able to relate to some stories and then hear how you both view it makes feel so much less isolated. And obviously the humour is appreciated, makes facing big emotions seem less daunting :)

[@Bidzil91]

I’m a therapist and enjoy their conversations tremendously 🔥

[@theminayang]

@23:44 I think the “switch flip” is your subconscious protecting yourself. I’ve had this before too recently in a couple of my relationships but not as intense as your switch flip since I can still tolerate and look at those ppl in the eye. I think you grew and a part of your realized your mom isn’t a safe person to be around. Don’t force anything that doesn’t feel comfortable to you and don’t feel guilty. It’ll take time and I hope your mom learns what she did and I hope for healing in general for your whole family. ❤ y’all deserve the best

[@Mrmeloncholy]

My mum died this morning and then I see this in my inbox 😭

[@viva_la_movies]

So sorry for your loss. Hope you're doing okay

[@thiabernadine]

I’m so sorry ❤

[@user-lp2nz7vq6b]

well damn, tell her to stop.

[@lynaghanem1844]

Wth​@@user-lp2nz7vq6b

[@beersospodcast]

oh my god we're so sorry, we hope you're okay..

[@Skelpiew]

My relationship with my mom is so similar. I love her so much, but nowadays I get so angry when she starts crying. I had to help her with her suicidal moments and trauma dumping when I was just a kid, but she never gave me the same. Whenever I tell her I’m suicidal, she essentially tells me to get over it and to just “stop thinking about it”. She doesn’t just sit down and listen to me talk about my problems like I sat and listened to her problems. That’s why I can’t be vulnerable with her Also, the thing about the Mother’s Day gifts is so real. She would tell me that she didn’t want anything for Mother’s Day, and I’d BELIEVE her (cause she’s the master of manipulation), but once it rolls around and I don’t get her something, she’s in her room crying all day and saying no one loves her. One last thing, about the white dads, they really aren’t always like that. My dad is fully white, but he literally doesn’t care. Like he just sits on the couch on his phone all day and doesn’t engage with anyone AT ALL.

[@lmdh270]

The common law on marriage is that if two partners live together for 3 years, they are considered conjugal not legally married. However, that only applies in Canada.

[@EliwoodX8]

Good info!

[@passion3131]

honestly this is my fave podcast episode of yours so far. i had a veryyy similar home life that derek was describing so now i just dont speak to my dad even though we're under the same roof. theres not even hostility anymore but it'd be awkward... i'm 21 too and still none of my friends know about my childhood trauma or anything like that because i find it hella embarassing so thank you for talking about it! i appreciate that yall get so personal it feels like a free therapy sesh

[@adiLaaA2]

when your parents have never created a safe space for you, it's always extremely hard to be vulnerable with them even more so when you still try to be vulnerable as a child, since you're confused why this safe person isn't safe; it's rough cause it affects your relationships even with yourself :/

[@theminayang]

Seeing y’all make me actually want kids of my own one day and raise them to be like you guys.

[@31lla6y8n]

considering the way they were raised idk if thats something to aspire to but i get what ur tryna say 😭

[@izziedias]

this is the first time I listened to this podcast, and oh god....I related way too much with the trauma I was raised by my grandmother (mom left, dad died), and she's really abusive and I never had a word to describe to friends how I feel about it, and embarrassing is literally the word. I just feel embarrassed. I can't just walk around my house, or have a conversation, because all my grandma does is scream at me. she follows me around, and keeps trying to get my attention to tell me how I ruined her life. before my dad died, he asked to take me in, and she still blames me for it. as if I was the one that gave my dad cancer and prompted him to ask her that. she also had a terrible boyfriend. and I actually managed to get the courage to talk to her about it. I sat her down and I told her how he tried to SA me. and she straight up said she didn't believe me. and said she wouldn't break up with him cuz he was so good to her and I was being ungrateful. that was about 6 years ago, I'm still living with her (unfortunately) but we don't really talk anymore. she still haunts me, but I do my best to ignore her. right now I'm just trying to focus on being done with college, getting a job and trying to leave as soon as possible. I'm really sorry you guys are in the housing situations that you are. you don't deserve it. I truly hope it gets better. for all of us.

[@zawa8100]

Bruh, I be walking with y’all and tryna heal myself. I feel like just listening to you guys be open and expressing your past makes it easier to acknowledge things about myself and things that happened in my childhood too. Anyways, good luck on Mother’s Day!

[@theminayang]

Also I’m sorry your witnessing those events at home. You both deserve the best supportive people around y’all. Can’t wait to see this podcast become HUGE. and to see what else y’all do

[@maricotissima]

when my dad died I was 10 and literally DECIDED NOT TO GRIEVE because I thought it was cringe ???????? derek said cringe so many times I'm starting to realize I WORK THE EXACT SAME WAY. people used to come to me offering hugs and kind word and I was like no bro this is cringe he just passed... (starting to truly deal with my grief 13 years laterrrr cheeeeck)

[@athinaaa15]

Broo same shit here but I was 15, I literally didn’t even realise it and I don’t want people to pity me. Like why should a child grieve bro like what’s the point. I understand you so much bro hahah why are all the dads going extinct

[@losvideosdesophie]

man i love this podcast and the fact that u guys are so open and vulnerable. Its such a rare thing to find on here so continue doing it🌞⭐️

[@liz4159]

why are they literally me with all these parents issues lol

[@LuckyPoolBall]

Having a bad relationship with your parents is hella painful even if you don’t verbalize it. They are the ones that are meant to be your safe space and actually become the opposite. They become the people that you need to protect yourself and your emotions from. This forces you to raise yourself in many ways because you can’t go to them for advice or guidance when you are feeling like sh*t. It also sucks when you look at people that have a nice and cozy relationship with their parents because it makes you crave it. But it gets better. If you have the opportunity to go to therapy, do so, and heal yourself ❤ of course if you are able to heal your relationship with your parents by doing family counseling, then do that as well ❤ but no worries if you can’t. Just take care of yourself and give yourself the love you need ❤

[@theminayang]

You guys are so hilarious 😂 new favorite podcast. Love how funny and emotionally intelligent y’all are

[@mafthew]

when beersos can be more vulnerable for you than their parents 🥺👉👈

[@kanviupadhyay8544]

you guys are the braincells in my head having a conversation at 2am i love u guys sm please never die 🫶

[@nicekitty41]

I just purchased your Patreon membership. I hope you're able to get Burger King with that.

[@princess.goth_]

🤣🤣🤣 unalive mom humour got me good

[@zzflvr]

3:39 best part lmao

[@dianan.y]

Was literally watching another one of your videos and had to stop for this one😭

[@OscarDiaz-mx8ik]

sending u both so much love. thanks for the vulnerability and generosity in sharing all this.

[@defamiliars]

Ngl, fixing your relationship w ur mom should happen asap, esp if you WANT to do it. You don't know when your or her last day on earth is, and the regret would hurt. If your mom is in a shitty relationship she hates, it means she is hurting, unhealed, and lacks self love and self awareness.

[@Noahwyer]

Always light up to a BeerSos KZbin notification 😋

[@kennypoomwa]

3:39 pause.

[@octopusoverlord7893]

Dude i have autism and no lie, the amount of times Derek mentions something about how his brain works that i go “hey that sounds just like me and my autism” is crazy

[@beersospodcast]

wait y'all wait wait wait

[@zahrahmahmood9620]

6:15 Very well said

[@sondrrr.]

BEERSOS FRIDAY🗣️😩

[@wey5150]

this podcast made me realize it’s not normal for your mom to yell at you at least 4 times a week (I go to my dads on the weekends) …..

[@ellygrimes4534]

holy shit bruh this is my first episode i'm watching 😭😭😭

[@115door]

i used to feel like my mom wronged me in many ways until she opened her trauma pandora's box that made me understand that whatever she did was because she was trying her best by her own pov of what was best. that made me look at our situation way differently and also cuz now i'm a grown up i understood better her reasonings. and my face also heats up when i'm stressed or tired and i just get so red that it makes me even more stressed bcs of people around me perceiving that

[@lauramaria8880]

“or because you can’t read..” 💀

[@athinaaa15]

You know your day will go well when beersos posted 3hrs ago

[@akka.alexld]

btw for a sec I read "I love youR mom" and it sounded like a proper beersos video title fs

[@passion3131]

love yall pls never change and i hope ur moms never watch this podcast

[@muzaffarabdullaev9315]

Derek you dont have big ears haha. They're proportional to your head size, which is good!

[@helenliang]

notcing nico zynning was the funniest shit

[@kamillasharma]

He’s not you dad

[@lucia-qb9mu]

this is so real i hate talking about my fucked up family and everyone’s like omg that’s crazy, it’s embarrassing

[@TimDFSmart]

Looking at the comments, way to many of us have been in the same situation as Derek. one of my earliest childhood memories is my dad dragging and beating my mom. Cant have friends over when theres abuse going on

[@india4735]

not a lawyer...😛but I'm pretty sure he's just a stepdad, UNLESS he takes the steps to legally adopt you as one of his children. I think your mom being married to him does not make him legally your dad, just makes them legally married. i think.

[@athinaaa15]

BRO i thought I forgot Mother’s Day but it turns out it’s on Sunday , I got so confused 😭

[@MO-rl9gl]

It’s Mother’s Day in Canada?

[@athinaaa15]

Noo I think the video is just dedicated to Mother’s Day (i also got confused )

[@elfishcoder7287]

It's on the 12th in Canada.

[@akka.alexld]

Soju, fried chicken and new episode :))

[@macandcheezs]

Wait ok 1) thank you for your vulnerability on this episode beersos, it was really beautiful & idk if y’all religious but I’ll be keeping y’all in my prayers bc y’all and your families deserve the best after everything, through & through 🥹 2) I’ve been spAMMING beersos content to get myself through hell month (finals month in grad school), thank you for making me smile continually & just being yourselves 😭💖 happy mommy day

[@kristinbosby9036]

I’m a mom lol

[@ClipsFan-wh6rv]

hey lol

[@zzflvr]

I Love You Nico

[@colleenmaclauchlan3651]

Bc same I’m not even planning to call her. Sent her flowers early in this week I said happy Mother’s Day in text and she ghosted me…just like my whole life!!!! 🤡🤡🤡🤡

[@soylilade]

Don’t be shy 😏 get a PO BOX and we can ALL send you cards!!!!

[@chromefenix9566]

Eh new pod ep🔥🔥🔥

[@mahaliacuizon8537]

im not a lawyer but i had a step dad because my mom got married (not common law, with a license) but he wasn't my dad legally because he didn't sign any documents to become my legal guardian. so legally, no I don't believe he would be your dad

[@alanna__]

Yess love this

[@athinaaa15]

HAHAH BRO derek happy Father’s Day dude (I also have the father pass)

[@EliwoodX8]

I can't not laugh at the gabagoo or whatever lmao

[@EL-xj8qc]

dont think u get married 'automatically' under common law - dereks mum and spawn are most likely cohabitants so he would not be ur stepdad yet

[@ingd.986]

no, not your dad.

[@bjonk9713]

WHAT THE FUCK OSU MENTiONED

[@Vanessa-ty1jt]

I like to think that if you don’t have a love-hate relationship with your mum does your mom REALLY love you?! 🥹

[@fififorgetmenot03]

Never related more to the "mum dating horrible men" thing🫡