i'm not okay (but I'm getting there)

[@Mr_Fruit]

I know this is a LONG video and I'm sure most of you won't get through it (which is totally fine) but I wanted to be as candid and transparent as I could for those that wanted the insight and because I think it's important I be vulnerable so others can hear my struggle and relate if possible. Thank you so much for all the support you've shown in my absence and I can't wait to return. It shouldn't be too much longer and I apologize that this video was so delayed but hopefully after listening you'll understand why. Forever grateful for the dedicated viewers and although I've been scared and anxious about how this break will impact the channel - I know I'm going to get back to great content with great viewers and we'll worry about the rest later. Love you all, missed you and hope you've been well!

[@andrewpaschall8992]

Love you too Fruit! ❤

[@justanotherlemon8847]

Hang in there fruit we will all still be here when you get back. Take as much time as you need.

[@xcookiex21]

Praying for you! ❤

[@xysion6429]

Hang in there fam. I'm just happy to hear something, was starting to get a little worried towards the end. Much love to You and Fruit Nation.❤

[@jaimiesoriano611]

sitting down to watch see how you doin fruit :c we appreciate your honesty and vulnerability with us, it’s not an easy feat especially with all the constant pressure. As fans and viewers, we are all happy and proud of you for doing what fulfills your needs. Because nothing saves us from being human, and whatever you find on your path to continue your youtube career, we believe in you! And are always rooting for you!

[@lothricexile9643]

100k views within the first 16 hours I think it's safe to say ur not forgotten. A lot of us have been awaiting ur return.

[@gixxerin1693]

Sir fruit. You were a huge part of my childhood. As for many others. do what you need for yourself we love you ❤

[@jacoblaflamme1167]

so true. im heartbroken to come back to this checking in on the channel after a couple years.

[@AaeriosYT]

I love you, Bowl. You’re one of the best people I’ve ever known. Thank you for sharing this and being vulnerable with us but most importantly thank you for being you.

[@Mr_Fruit]

Love you Aaerios, I’ll always be your “Bowl”

[@julianperez1420]

It’s great to see you fruit. We’re here to support you.

[@mudiametokunboh2370]

W

[@SemiCommma]

W

[@oneguardianarmy9188]

Take all the time you need my guy, we're not going anywhere, through thick and thin brotha ❤

[@ImBored8141]

^

[@RangerEnigma]

The traction this video got shows everyone is sticking with you Fruit.

[@o_xxie4135]

as someone with adhd, your variety content as always been such a warm welcome and breath of fresh air

[@anna-gt2mu]

A

[@anna-gt2mu]

A

[@anna-gt2mu]

A

[@JIGnonymous]

I think those of us long time viewers need to be asking if Fruit is 100% when he does make a new video. Not as a pestering thing but to keep him committed to himself. As much as your favorite KZbinrs commit their time to entertaining us, I feel as though we owe them as much to help keep them confident that they can care for themselves without us being flakey. Keep Fruit a whole melon! No slices

[@atoushu]

My heart bleeds for you, Christian. You and your crew were always welcoming when I'd come on as a guest star back in the day (like 3 videos). My internet barely worked and averaged 100ms, half the time I sounded like a robot, you still allowed me to help out. I hope you keep doing better, even if it's just .1% each day.

[@vesves_4]

I had to wait a few days to watch this because I'm also struggling a little right now, but your honesty and vulnerability helped me too, I think. I'm 36 and just starting to discuss an ADHD diagnosis with my therapist. It's interesting how differently it can present in women. I've been watching you for so long and I have no plans to stop as long as you're here. Of any other channels that I watch, I truly, genuinely wish the best for you. Even though we don't know each other, you've done a lot for me, and I'm more than happy to at least give you my one little view on each of your videos. Boosting that female demographic! But you're right, it's ok to not feel ok. And feeling better after feeling terrible for so long can take a lot of time. That's such a frustrating part of it. I'm happy you're letting yourself breathe more this time and it really seems like you're taking this from the right angles. Like you said, you're slowing down and just letting yourself exist. You are doing the right thing. It may not seem like it sometimes, but you are.

[@Mr_Fruit]

Thank you for your continued support, I recognize your name and your continued interaction. I hope everything works out for you and you find an answer, I really do!

[@TheHeadincharge]

In general, many people don't realize and understand the inattentive symptoms of ADHD and only discuss the hyperactive symptoms which are more prevalent in boys (due primarily to social roles and a bit of genetics). Young girls are often encouraged to and learn to "mask" more than boys on average for this reason, creating surprisingly different outcomes. While the base disorder is largely the same thing between the genders, the way the disorders present can be surprisingly different for these reasons. I am about to earn my PhD in Cognitive Neuroscience and was only diagnosed with ADHD two years ago myself. While I have combined type, I got good at masking and coping with my inattentive behaviors and my hyperactive aspect didn't show itself in the "stereotypical ways". You likely know a lot of what I typed, I'm more so putting this here for others to see and read if they are interested. Also, an important disclaimer for anyone reading this not to self-diagnose yourself or seek any specific diagnosis. If you are struggling with something and think you may have a specific mental health concern, find a therapist or psychologist and be as honest as you can about your symptoms with them. The goal should always be to improve yourself and fix/work through a problem, not to get a diagnosis, though that may be in the path towards self-improvement.

[@kiri9979]

not gonna lie hearing the outro in the end really shook my heart we're waiting Mr Fruit take your time and return to us safely ♥

[@Its-Sawyer]

Long time viewer ( D1 No Land Beyond/Destiny Fun Police Era) first time commenter. Mr. Fruit videos have always held a certain place in my life as an escape from the stress and responsibilities of the real world and I cannot stress how much an impact this channel has had on my development as an individual. The joy, laughter, and inspiration you provide to your audience is worth more than any simple "like" or comment could ever convey, you bring out the best emotions towards others and you deserve nothing more than the same for yourself. This break from creating content is a very small price to pay for the knowledge that you are taking care of and working on yourself which will only strengthen your resolve and love for these videos. Doesn't matter the content, doesn't matter the video length, doesn't matter the popularity of a video because I come back every time to support the creator, to support you. Best of luck in your journey, and I can't wait for the return of the King!

[@NotSoScaryJerry]

Core audience member here: We love ya brother ❤I appreciate you being vulnerable for us and honestly I cried when I saw your video in my feed. I'm glad you're making progress and I'm glad you recognize you're not okay (and that's okay) but making your way there. Always going to be here when you come back. Great to see you again!

[@user-ub5er8mt8c]

NGL, I gotta teary eyed when I saw a Mr. FRUIT video in my feed too.

[@dacubstim5010]

I've read a few comments and this says how I'm feeling. I was literally looking at your channel today while at the doctor for my wife just see if there were any updates. I got the alert you posted this later in the day and stopped working just to watch you and hear your voice again. I don't care about "youtubers" or any of that stuff, however you are the main reason I even go on KZbin. My family and I have been praying for you for months and I'm so glad to hear your on the mend. I can't speak for the core members, but I will say I don't love you because your funny and make great videos, those are just perks. I genuinely love you as a person because you've brought joy to millions of people, who's busted his butt for the sake of his fans. You're loved by so many because you're you, an all around amazing person. I too travel to CO periodically for work. Every time I'm there I am constantly keeping my eyes and ears open hoping I get the honor to meet you. For me, it would be on the level of meeting a Cubs player or Gordon Ramsey. As a die hard Cubs fan who's never met a player in person, it would be a top 5 moment in my life. I know you don't believe you're on that level, but you've meant that much to me and many others over the years. Keep pushing through brother. We are here for you no matter what. I'm praying that your core members step up to support you more than ever especially with the upcoming product launch. Blessings to you and the fam Sir Fruit. Never forget that you are loved.

[@dankparrot4206]

You are actually one of the few KZbinrs I genuinely wish the best for fruit. I will always support you man

[@myname5663]

Love you Christian, been following since 60 second reviews in d1. ❤️

[@jackbukraba3206]

Just wanna say I’ve been here for almost the whole time you’ve been doing this full time haha. Since I was in 3rd grade! And now I’m 19 you are my childhood, and don’t forget you are so many peoples childhoods. We grew up watching you. I love you so much and hope you heal in every way you should.

[@cheflib4239]

Same situation here

[@Glaciate05]

I am also 19 but it's been 4 years for me, I feel the same, grown up w mr. fruit across multiple youtube accounts and stages in my life

[@grinningwolfcarlson6717]

The exact same story from me , I started out watching your dream team and exotic review videos at the start of d1 the dark below , and now I'm 19 and remember all of the good times , thank you so much for the memories

[@arjun___shah]

Dude, same I have been watching Fruit since High School when I was 15. I am 24 now lol. Fruit is the only youtuber I watch

[@jackbukraba3206]

@@grinningwolfcarlson6717same exact thing it was specifically the montage videos of d1 for me

[@mvox1781]

Not generally a commenter, but I’m sure I’m not alone in saying this. Anytime I’ve ever been in an extremely low and similar spot you’ve always got me through those times. So thank you!! I wish I could do the same for you and if there’s ever anything I or we can do definitely let us know, but we will always be here for you! Take your time and we will be waiting when you’re ready ❤

[@ascoolas77]

I haven’t watched this channel in a while and generally don’t watch update videos for KZbinrs. But I watched this whole video as I have been going through a horrible time recently as it’s nice to hear that other people are going through similar things and that I’m not alone and is making me feel better. So I hope that you end up good after all of this

[@josephbook1965]

I’ve been watching for years now, got into one of your destiny lobbies a few years back when I was around 14-16. It was around when my father passed. Your videos helped me a lot, and they still do. We’ll be here when your feeling good again. You got this

[@thetealphoenix5485]

I found you when I was hospitalized and diagnosed with crohns, I couldn’t eat lost fifty lbs in a month and didn’t know what was gonna happen. You helped me through one of the lowest scariest points of my life. You take care of you and we will be here for you like you’ve been for us

[@TNTmage7]

Holy shit are we the same person? I was in the exact same situation (with the addition of sepsis). I’d been watching fruit for years, but he was doing a nuzlocke at the time and to be honest, his videos were one of my reasons to get up every day.

[@thetealphoenix5485]

@@TNTmage7 i had cdif on top of that, however you spell it lol. He helped so much I was majorly depressed and my sons first Christmas he’s visiting me in the hospital strapped to a bunch of tubes and wires. It’s nice to meet people who understand that

[@adamdavis6671]

Just going through this exact thing now. Hope your doing better. If it gives you any hope my mom had this 30 years ago and it vanished after 5 years and has yet to come back. No medical reason for it. I know neither of us can guarantee that but it gives me hope

[@thetealphoenix5485]

@@adamdavis6671 I have flair ups but I became allergic to my Humira so I’ve been I medicated and after some major diet and life changes I’ve been doing a lot better. Energy is a major issue still but there’s hope I promise. Find what works for you and make sure you focus on self care, anger and stress will wreck you but we got this. Thank you and be well

[@dpm1789]

Really appreciate someone with a large audience being vulnerable enough willing to share their struggles even though you certainly don’t have to. Always proud to be a member of the core audience ❤

[@tannerdillon3303]

Thank you Mr. Fruit. I’ve been watching your videos since 2015 and you have been a light and source of comfort in my life for a long time. Today I am student in Law school and have just been diagnosed with ADHD and major depression. For the last year and a half I’ve been suffering from feelings of depression and anxiety that I didn’t know that I could feel. I have never worked so hard in my life to learn and work to build a future for myself and my fiancé. But since starting this and dealing with this work I’ve been feeling constantly anxious and stressed (which I justified as normal) but these soon evolved into depression, fatigue, self harm, and plenty more. I’m finally starting to realize the toll that putting myself under that much pressure and stress has done to me. The point that I’m trying to get to is that your video nailed it right on the head. It’s taken me a bit to watch it all but you summarize so many of the feelings that I have been struggling. Hearing your struggles and thoughts are so comforting just to know that I’m not alone in feeling these things. You should take tremendous pride in being able to articulate yourself and these feelings but also for being brave enough to share this part of yourself. That is something I don’t know if I could ever do but hope that one day I will. Take time for your mental and physical health and keep your family and friends close. I wish you all the best Christian and thank you again!!

[@tarynolyvia]

We love you so much Fruit. So so much. Take your time and heal your way. We all support you. Edit: just finished the video. We watch you for YOU. I’m a 33 year old mom. I mostly watch the Nuzlockes because I am not cool. But I will always stay subscribed and check in as often as possible without a Pokémon game because I am here FOR YOU. ❤ Mad kudos to you for really putting yourself first so that you can get to a better place. You’re amazing, Christian!

[@FalloutPlays]

Love you man. Vid is very relatable. Will always be in your corner.

[@Mr_Fruit]

Thanks for taking the time to watch and respond, appreciate that and will also be rooting for you and your variety pivot. Always around if you need someone, much love

[@S2ThaB5145]

Your wellness is a priority. We will be here always! Video was posted only 7 mins ago and there is already 2000 views. We are still here and will be.

[@Kisarice]

It took me a while to watch this because I knew it would be emotional for me too. I got through it all. I just wanted to let you know that you are an inspiration. Opening up about everything going on with you is helpful to so many people, me being one of them. I’m glad that you are taking this break and working on you first. I came to your channel because of Among Us at first but I stayed because the content you make is enjoyable for me. I’ve stayed through the channel changes because no matter what game you’re doing, I just relate. I also play so many different games and I like to watch ones that you play so I can find ones that I’ll enjoy. Thank you for being vulnerable and updating us. Your community loves you! ❤

[@codylouis870]

Love you Fruit. I might not understand where you are exactly. But Ill be here when you get back and I know so will many of us. When you get back we will work towards rebuilding your channel as a community. You don't have to do it all alone and just know we miss you but everyone needs some time. Take care of yourself for now and we will welcome you back when you are ready. -Cody

[@Izaerial]

5 years ago, I went from married to suddenly separated. My life fell apart in the largest ways. I was at the lowest I have every been, and even was suicidal. Your channel was the main thing that got me through my sleepless nights and days. I would pass out with your voice in my ears. We as a community are here for you thick or thin, because you have been there for us, even if it's an unknown entity on your part. We love you Fruit. Take care of yourself, we support you whether that means we get new content or not.

[@gabrielmontes289]

This is beautiful

[@martini7454]

I went through a similar situation with a 7 year relationship coming to an end, as I discovered Mr. Fruit! I hope you are doing well now, friend!

[@SHARKKTOOTH]

Love you, Fruit. I’m sure recording, editing and posting this video must of been a real journey for you, but I am proud of you for doing it. Thank you for all you’ve done and for being a great friend. Hope to game or hang out with you again soon.❤️

[@caseyking8394]

I've been diagnosed with ADHD since the second grade, anxiety has been a big issue for me as well. last year I had a massive depressive episode which took me more than 6 months to climb out of. A video this honest is a great step in the healing process, at least in my opinion, as being able to talk about and recognize the symptoms and causes of your depression is a CRUCIAL part of being able to resist the worst parts of depression in the future. Now instead of months of terrible days, I can recognize an incoming depressive episode and work to prepare myself and give myself the space I need. Good luck with the rest of your journey, you aren't alone in this, although your experience is just as unique and personally significant as it is for each of us struggling with you.

[@silencedak9859]

As a day 1 supporter (1ksubs) I fing love u man fr, and i will always be here and watch all your videos and if I have to wait 1 week, 2 weeks,3 weeks, heck even a 420p video I will still watch u man because u are the shit Taking a long break is fine and it will only tell you how many people who will still watch u after the break, those are the real supporters

[@BrianWF34]

One hour forty-six minutes. Watched every second. I'm so proud of you. For everything you do, especially for yourself. Take this bit of advice my Dad gave me long ago: "If you're not happy, it will show throughout your life. You must take care of yourself FIRST." Sage advice that I passed onto my kids, and you seem to be working on that as well. Do what you need, we will still be here for you when you are ready, son.👍

[@schuylerblanton]

Fruit you've always been there for us in our hard times and good times, I know for me personally your videos have been a life saver, sometimes quite literally! Don't beat yourself up, you got a whole community behind you, life has its struggles and you got the strength to get through it! No doubt from this fan!

[@Wickedstrife]

I have been here nearly since the beginning. While i have had periods of not watching videos, between adhd, life, and work sometimes i get lost lmao, i have always been here and a member : i clicked the second it was an option. It may only be 5$, but i truly hope it helps. I will always be here and be back to watch your videos. You know the second you're putting out that cahntent again, I'll be back 1000%. You have meant so much and helped me through a lot. Get yourself better and I'll be here when you get back. You are amazing and i truly love your content for you. Your unique personality and attitude are everything. Feel better man and I'm rooting for you!!

[@rogero8443]

Your video made me really, really ponder on life and makes me love all the content you've done MORE than I already do - as it seems obvious coincides with many other on here. This has already been out a week but I don't care about this being in the limelight so much as it gets to you. Please take your time. Lots of time. You say a timeline and you hate to not deliver, but please please PLEASE please please don't do what I firmly believe my dad did. Expectations mean nothing, nothing at all if it means your mental health is compromised. The physical path you are about to endeavour on with your jaw will spiral your mental health inevitably as it would to anyone else. Maybe more in your case with what you've outlined. Because of that and your very keen focus on the details of youtube and honestly everything else you've talked about here, it's gonna hurt. However thinking about you even if it means hurting your youtube analytics or subs that get bored easily, your family is worth it. Your friends are worth it. I wish my dad could have seen this aspect. Your youtube and your followers will come back, you've done it before! New sponsors will come, despite how hard on everything it must have been to back out on some. In 30 years from now, the Future Fruit will thank the Now Fruit. The one difference between you and my dad is I'll never know if my dad was in that position, I can only wonder and speculate. Your family may mean more to you than yourself, and I am not one to say that's wrong, but without you they are not complete. If you can say with 100% certainty you are wholly there for them in love and spirit - THEN come back to youtube, in the way you want. I mean you don't need to stop vids entirely, but if all you put out here is a lets play here and there, guess what???? You're still you!!! I love all the high-effort content you do, but I watched this in the entirely because I enjoy you as a personality. as a human. I can relate to you just doing what you do. In terms of daily processes, like you said, there is a brickwall in doing anything at times. You get overwhelmed by having a shower as I certainly can relate to. It all starts with: getting out of bed. The same energy you need to think about a shower, or editing a video, playing an hour with the family or friends, start a language, trying to control your schedule, is all the same amount of energy as getting out of bed. When you can get out of bed after your alarm without going through the entire process, you can start seeing that the energy to doing anything else is the same as well. I agree, play stuff you like. There is a newer youtuber called Darth Microtransactions. He has no editors or analytic experts, he just loves doing what he's doing and is thankful. He became popular because he was the "I do what I want, diablo 4 made me popular?? Well I want to talk about Runescape or go outside and I hope you guys come along". I can see him changing a bit now with him having more money and knowing some other popular youtubers, for the worse. I think he'll even out as he is a genuinely good guy, but the point is - do what you love, we will all watch, we love your personality. You were pinpointed on fans saying they love your erratic content choices - but I think you may be better off simply being you. If you do only the thing you love that day, not worrying about tomorrow until you love a new thing - guess what, you'll be in the that zone fans were trying to articulate. They said it because they were trying to describe you. They were not saying anything you do otherwise is bad, they just see you as you, and grow with you. Don't worry about covering Destiny either, Cayde may be back, but the company is sliding in a bad direction and they don't really deserve more. This is as a lover of Destiny. I found you because of a Destiny friend showing me your stuff, but I never thought of you as a Destiny youtuber until now. My favorite series that I watched multiple times, was the olympics. The spelling bee I actually copied for a work meeting. I work in ophthalmology, so it was eye specific and it got TOUGHHHH. But everyone loved it. I gave you tons of credit. Or I binge nuzlocks of your and now Rob's as he's just as awesome to be honest haha. You gotta slow down on your infatuation with youtube analytics. They try SO HARD to make sure you cannot understand them. People's full time job is to ensure it's cloudy. Don't stop youtube, I love your channels. Just slow down, try so hard to focus on what you love. This is what you get for making a two hour video. I took the same amount of time to write this :D Thank you for opening up - this video was like making a one-sided friend, and I hope you know you're cared about, as superficial as it may sound. Live your best life. If you can't say you're doing that, then take breaks, or upload more vids, or fuck it do both, but don't judge life by your hurdles, judge you by you NOW. If you now is 0.000001% better than yesterday, then shit you are doing better than most other people out there. I'm proud of you good sir.

[@rogero8443]

couple mistakes corrected

[@Miss_mcgeek]

I'd like to think I'm one of that core community (been watching since before Space Magic and even had the pleasure of meeting you a couple of times at GCX), so was glad to see this and hear that you're doing a little better. We (me and my other half) were pretty worried. And although you don't owe anyone an explanation, I really respect and admire your transparency. Being vulnerable takes a huge amount of courage. Anyway, I don't usually comment but watching this, I thought that commenting more is perhaps one small thing I can do. So many people want to help, I'm sure. And while likes are great, they don't convey a whole lot of info. Like the fact that we thought your recent videos were some of the best you've ever made. From the idea to the scripting to the production. Just fantastic! We've loved watching you grow as a creative in this way over the years, pivoting but also finding the joy in your work. And as and when you come back, we'll be there. Looking forward to what the next chapter brings : )

[@Mac_Laoch]

That's the same video that brought me to the channel. I was too busy with work and family to be able to everything I wanted to do in destiny. So watching the destiny montages, dream team crucible videos, and Mr fruit challenge videos gave me my out.

[@MrNickman123]

Yooooo I started watching during his D1 days too!

[@14AllanD]

Never clicked a notification for YT so fast. I'm sorry to hear how rough all has been, im certainly watching the full video as I finish my work shift. Love you pal, take care ❤

[@ScrewyStein]

We'll be here when you're ready Mr. Fruit. Take your time and stay strong.

[@MrMarkSix]

Mr fruit i’ve been watching you since i was about 10 im almost 17 now. my cousin first introduced me too you and i’ve watched since and i’ve begun to relate to you a lot with mental issues and i always go to you when i need a laugh i and the rest of fruit nation loves you dilly dilly

[@paxtonbarrick1594]

For me, you were a big part of growing up. From when I found this channel in elementary school to now in college, Mr. Fruit was always there. You were always there for us for a laugh and a good time, we will be there for you. The fruit faithful isn’t going anywhere any time soon.

[@Drocksas]

I think you just found a new fan name for this community. Here's to the Fruit Faithful! For House Fruit!

[@paxtonbarrick1594]

@@DrocksasDilly dilly!

[@AshlynRose0210]

As one of your 13-18 year old viewers: I’ve been here for probably five years. You’ve meant so much to me throughout this time. You’ve helped me laugh in my lowest points. You’ve made me smile when I was spiraling. And most importantly… you’ve been relatable. Maybe you don’t relate to as many younger people any more (I’m an old soul, lol), but you’re the KZbinr I see the most of myself in. Long live House Fruit. Rest well, Lord Fruit!

[@Mr._MatchIt]

While I don’t watch you as much, I consistently watch this video whenever I’m having troubles of my own. I love making music, but there’s always a thorn in my stomach that makes me prevent things to become clean. I am glad you made this video, because it makes me feel like I’m finally at that place of welcoming. Don’t give up your passion ever! I wish you well.

[@damienbertwell7284]

I went through the ADHD diagnosis and treatment about a year before you did. I fully understand your statements about how much the stimulants help. Really sucks that you were allergic to them :( hopefully you can find something new that helps as much. Good luck Mr. Fruit and hang in there!

[@TheDemigodKing]

I've gone back and forth with this comment but ill try to keep it short and sweet. Remember that you don't know many of us (personally) but we know you, thanks to videos like this! You're our friend and we care. Here when you need us and cheering for you when you don't. You taking time has never and will never be a problem. What matters the most is that you do what you have to for yourself. And if I'm allowed to be a little selfish, what also matters is that you always come back. I'm 1 hour and 17 minutes in and love that many things have been addressed and you've gotten them off your chest. Hopefully some weight is lifted off your shoulders. Time to tear down the castle of burnout that's been built, dust off the blueprint (getting back to the basics), and build a kingdom full of things you will be proud of. House Fruit's future is looking bright -- don't call it a comeback! :D If you need more time then go for it. Core group is here 'till the end! Ok back to watching the rest of the video. Love ya! Also, so much for short......1hr and 36 mins in and now finishing this. Oh well. Worth it even if you never see this.

[@sel_gaming8916]

I'll be one in thousands who comment here but I can't even explain the impact you've had on my life. I'm not joking I met some of the best friends I've ever had in my entire life purely because I found your content and got involved in the extended dream team crew like 6 years ago. I couldn't thank you enough for the YEARS of laughs, the endless comfort on some of my worst years (I'm not joking I spent years of therapy and you were a facet of escapism in that journey so thank you). You'll always have me as a viewer and I hope you know we've always got your back man. I wish you nothing but the absolute best for you personally and I want to extend that to your family as well man. You deserve it. God bless.

[@KraytonNHG]

Been with ya since the Titanfall day's and I'll continue to support you my dude. I deal with severe ADHD and the meds suck, Had some not so great thoughts years ago so I shut myself off for a couple day's and went cold turkey. Almost 20 year's later and I am back on meds but for the better, My oldest son also deal's with this and I am trying to guide him along this path. Hang in there Mr Fruit, Stay strong and don't keep it bottled up.

[@studiopercy8994]

Take all the time you need, you will never be forgotten and mean more than you could ever imagine to so many people. Glad to hear you're getting the time and help you need. Can't wait to see the comeback!

[@Xavior48]

I don’t have almost 2 hours to watch this right now but I can’t explain how much you and this channel mean to me. From all the laughs when I’ve been down and the excitement of coming home from school to a new fruit video (now it’s work). You’ve been a huge happy part of my life and honestly, it hurts knowing you’re not okay. I’m glad though that you still think so highly of the constant viewers who have watched you and the dream team throughout the years. It means a lot to me. I feel like I said the same thing over and over but one more time. You are goated. I love you bro and I hope you get better.

[@twistedsnebula2504]

Bro, seeing Fruit now is like seeing a dearly missed friend again. Please take the time you need, we love you enough to make the length of time your not uploading irrelevant. Many of us will be here whenever you are. 🧡

[@kazrizak8937]

Fruit went to my high school been watching him since I was in high school and, watching your videos in high school got me through it. And your perspective on senior year turned into mine and it changed my life for the better thank you so much Mr. Fruit hope to actually meet you someday!!!

[@4whomittolz846]

I've watched you since your overwatch days, and was surprised to find you on Destiny when I started getting into the game. I'm absolutely here for your personality driven content. It may feel awful to be forced into a box as a Destinytuber, but you should think of it as a solid foundation to build variety content on top of. All of the core Destiny audience love seeing you in colabs with the big streamers, and your core audience will ride or die with any content you put out. Don't worry fruity, you take care of yourself, put out what you can, and we'll take care of the numbers.

[@MrAioros]

Not sure if I'm a "core" follower but I've been watching for a long time, and this video just made me subscribe, which I rarely do on YT. There's something incredibly beautiful about a person sharing their mental load with other people, where everyone in the audience, even the lucky ones like me who don't struggle with pathological issues, get hit by a wave of empathy and self-reflection and recognition of buried feelings and thoughts they barely knew were there. Loved this video. Get well soon.

[@willsseeeal8357]

I may be in a small demographic of your viewers being 18, but I still find your content so relatable and so genuine, thank you for all the work you do for your community.

[@akshaybodla163]

I’m pretty sure there’s a lot of us that grew up past 18 and 21 as me fruit fans. And now I wonder how much of the fan base we actually make

[@McJizzleBerries]

@@akshaybodla163 Thats crazy to think about, not just for Mr.fruit but people like pewdiepie and markiplier too, id love there to be a site to check subscription dates and whose actually stuck around? would be interesting to see

[@jacobsandoval364]

I didn't even become a fan until i was 25 and have watched every video for the last 2 years. People enjoy what they enjoy don't let age block you.

[@MichaelHplus]

I’m 45 and am a fan 😊

[@McJizzleBerries]

@@MichaelHplus what a legend, still young tho 😜 I’ll see you on destiny 5 hahaha

[@Kushey4025]

Been watching you for longer than I can remember. You have brought me out of so many dark places. We will wait as long as you need. We will all be here. Much love ❤

[@Mtheory989]

It’s amazing how much our moods are simply dictated by the chemistry in our brains. I suffer from OCD, depression and comorbid social anxiety and sporadic panic attacks. I found an SSRI on the first try (very lucky and rare) that was a godsend after suffering through hell for 7 years. 20 years later I’m still on the same meds and they are still working. So I can only imagine being given Adderall and it working - I understand having a light “switch go on” moment and being like “ahhhhh, this is how life is supposed to be.“ So to have that taken away because of the throat symptoms, must have been sooo deflating. Fight the good fight, find the right combo of meds and CBT to start. Then make sure later on you hydrate, eat and exercise if you can. It seems insurmountable but it IS NOT impossible. I’m living proof. Screw the stigma towards being on meds or having to do therapy - you do you man. Put the channel and sponsors on hold!!! You bring so much light into this world. You are not Atlas - don’t carry the world on your shoulders bud. All the best.

[@Tomographic]

Good to see you man! Your mental and physical health should always be the #1 priority. You have an audience that will support you no matter what and that's not always the case with gaming youtubers... You've always tried to put the "you" in youtube and that means a lot as far as establishing a relationship with your core audience goes. Much love! 🧡

[@Mr_Fruit]

Thanks for taking the time to comment, always a pleasant and humbling surprise seeing mutuals pop up. Hope all is well with you as well!

[@niceguynihilist2764]

This channel means the world to me. A beacon of light on the platform. You are a warm, real, and wholesome individual who we can all learn from, even just at a human standpoint. This channel has always stood out as welcoming and happy place. We partly have you to thank for that. No matter what, keep being you and take care! We’ll be here waiting, we appreciate ya!

[@Botmini17]

Im so sorry man i know how surgery anxiety is , i recently got a collagen cross linking surgery done and its felt like 5 tons of pressure has been lifted off me its been haunting me for years, a demon of the back of my mind where ill be having a good day then I remember it. Honesty the procedure was cake but just the terror before hand was horrible. Try not to let your mind go wild you got this bro, and i know its not really that sedimental since this is a comment section but i wish best for you. And remember youre the mrfruit inspiration of thousands probably millions you have an army of supporters. ❤️

[@Clouded_Kenai]

I have been watching on and off since your destiny 1 exotic reviews and the different montages, life is hard but I always wind back up at this channel and each time I come back I still end up laughing and have a great time, I just wanted to thank you for providing a safe space to recharge my brain even though you’ve been going through it yourself

[@MidwesternGoodbye]

Hey Mr. Fruit. I just want you to know that you are certainly not alone. I have many parallels with your mental health history. I was undiagnosed with PTSD for 25 years. Then broke. I was non-functional for over a year. I lost my full time job. But i got help. You being open with your struggles helped break the stigma for me. I guess i just feel compelled after all this time of watching, but yeah. Keep your health as priority one my guy.

[@PaxolGaming]

Hey Christian, I have been watching you since I was in middle school and I’m a senior in college now. I have watched you grow and you have been a major part of my life. It’s good to have you back and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for you. Be true, be yourself, and we will all be here to support you. #Fruitnation

[@maxcaruso5390]

Damn man I'm living the exact same timeline

[@carebear8884]

literally same

[@machall6108]

It took me a couple drives and downtime at work to watch/listen to this video, but well worth it. You do not owe us an explanation, but we appreciate how open you are with your Mr. Fruit Fam. You do what YOU want to do. We are there to feel like we are hanging with our buds watching our friend play games. Takes me back to passing the N64 controller around for single player games. It’s not the game, but the memories you make with friends WHILE playing the game. Excited for the gigachad, based content you’ll drop. Can’t wait. Much love Mr. Fruit 😎

[@zoe7107]

Focus on you! Keep growing! That’s all we can ask for! ❤ Just do what you enjoy!!!

[@nategilbert2376]

I'm sorry that it's been tough for you recently Fruit. I'll edit my comment after I've seen the whole video, but for what it's worth (and as you noticed already), your core group of followers are here to stay. I think I can speak for us when we say we wish you the best, and whenever you're ready to come back, we'll be back to watching every single video you put out, regardless of what it's about. We're here because we like you and your CAHNTENT, and that's all there is to it. Also, dear lord has KZbin felt empty without the regular Fruit videos, we miss ya.

[@0Crayman]

Again and again I'm surprised how much I can identify with you. Your physical problems, your mental ones, hell, even being scared of not being able to deliver hits home. It's like seing myself always delivering the content, being vulnerable, power through the worst challenges and caring for a community so much. It feels like you're just like me (maybe funnier :D) and for that I wanted to really say: Thank you so much!

[@alishakane5097]

Take your time, you will get there.. I have long covid and POTS as a result of covid and part of that is chronic fatigue.... let me tell you.. what you say to describe living with chronic fatigue is so spot on. It is the most miserable thing I have experienced, between that, brain fog, depression and anxiety I can totally relate to some of the dark places you have been mentally. Interesting what you say about the dream team though, of course you couldn't help but take the comments of '*this person* is my favourite' personally. I too have my favourites within the dream team but those videos always felt like we were along for the ride with you. Like, I love Raab but I love his banter with you and how you guys bounce off one another, ultimately your my favourite, your the reason I'm watching but those guys are hilarious and I love seeing you guys all hang together. It's upsetting to think you can't always see your worth but I get it.. It would be nice if we could let you see yourself through our eyes :) my whole family watches your videos, sometimes even when we are sitting eating dinner at the couch, I was looking to buy the Mr Fruit Tshirt for my husband but I got frustrated with the website! anyway, take care Mr Fruit, I look forward to your return :)

[@miggythepiggy141]

Hey man, I believe in you. Thank you for the update video

[@DraconisSmith]

We will always be here for you whether you stay or not Fruit. Your core audience has been here through thick and thin. I promise you I am here for you, countless hours of watching you and listening to you has cemented me as one of those core. Whatever you decide, you've done more for me and others than we could ever give back. Love you,

[@Cursed_rooster]

It’s only been up for 23 minutes and I have to get ready for work, but I’m gonna finish it. Just wanted to say you take your time and focus on you brother! All the fruit-fans are gonna be here supporting you. You’ve been a huge escape for me over the years and I’ve enjoyed all the videos. Hang in there and know that there’s people out there that got your back!

[@johnleggio4148]

You’ve always been a huge enjoyment. Your personality is very close to my old bestfriend. He had it rough several years back and we grew apart due to a situation that happened to me that put him into a bad position of choices which led to him getting bullied if he hung out with me. He ended up in a bad crowd and ended up in a rehab center for over a month. I found you a few years after a few years after we broke apart. Watching you felt like I was able to get my old bestfriend back just a little bit. I’m often busy with work and couldn’t watch a lot of your newer videos but I’ll forever be thankful for the positivity that you brought to my life. Please take a break and care for your mental health bro, dark times and places happen and we are here for you.

[@thehealymeister9287]

Hi Mr Fruit! I watched the whole thing and I'm proud of you. I've been subbed since you were under 1k subs and you never fail to entertain me. I've been on a similar journey of self-discovery and I'm glad to hear that we're both slowly figuring it out. Wishing you the best going forwards, I'll be here every step of the way ❤

[@whodawhatamiss7603]

We miss you so much brother. Take all the time you need. Mental health is the number one important thing in life. Wishing you nothing but healthy health for you and your wife 💕

[@ssgttelrik]

Hang in there, Mr. Fruit. I know it’s hard to open yourself up in this way; that took a lot of courage. Hold on to that courage, and know that we are here for you through thick and thin. Can’t wait to see you make a comeback that is a roaring success. We got your back.

[@arjun___shah]

Man Fruit I just want to give you a big ass hug. I am so for you taking even more time off. End of the year or like however many months in to 2024. I, and many others, will be here when you are ready.

[@daniellebolt5989]

Mr Fruit!! I’m not a old fan, came ‘round during the Among Us era, but I still enjoyed you as a person and creator so much! I rewatch your videos day in and out and laugh at all of your jokes and comments. You’re my favorite Among Us KZbinr and on of my favorite KZbinrs still. I hope you feel better soon and that you find the rest you’re needing! We love you fruit!

[@noisepoIIution]

Bought a channel membership for the first time just to show my support. Your honesty is nothing short of admirable. Take all the time you need, we will always be here ❤

[@Mr_Fruit]

That means a lot, I never want to make people feel like they have to support me monetarily but it means a lot when they (you) choose to. ❤️

[@noisepoIIution]

@@Mr_Fruit ❤️

[@stormmtb5068]

Your mental and physical health is so much more important than anything. Take your time we love you and will be here. I’ve been here since you basically started. Eyes up you got this boy.

[@andrewm8933]

I’m glad to see you man! It’s a relief just to see you progressing. I can very much relate to the walkthrough brain. I have a technical job that often requires many stages and steps, and this carries over to the rest of my life (dishes, then wash the laundry, walk to dogs, fry the laundry, set coffee maker, etc) thinking everything way before even doing a single task. Sometimes I wish i could turn it on/off at will too. Thanks for listening to my TED talk lol

[@aPandaOnDrugs]

Burnout is something I struggle hard with. I’ve quit jobs over it, struggled with home life because of it, it’s so hard to track for me. If you got those books handy would love to know more. Will be here when you are ready man!

[@ghalienturpin120]

I’m proud to be a core audience member. I started watching you about 8 years ago and still carve out time in my day to watch your videos. You never disappoint and I will be waiting for next video when you’re ready for it

[@viviennevien]

I watched this entire video, and no part of me regrets it. I'm so proud of you, Mr. Fruit, no matter what happens. Your willingness to keep going for the sake of your viewers is something I could never imagine, and the willpower it takes to quit is even greater. You and your videos are such an inspiration to me. Taking the path to heal is something that's truly such a struggle, coming from someone who is there and has been there. Just seeing you upload again almost brought me to tears, not because I was expecting more content and videos, but because I was so happy that you were okay. All your viewers are so proud of you for making this video, taking a break, being so incredibly vulnerable and open, and every decision that you will make in the future. This next part is going to be long, but I feel the need to express how there's nothing wrong with Fruit and nothing wrong with anyone who is experiencing this by explaining my own situation, and how there are people who are right there struggling with you. It may be triggering and generally, I'll be talking a lot, so feel free to leave after reading this part, if you've even made it this far. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm being selfish, and just using this as a space to talk about myself and rant. Genuinely, I only wish to help people feel like they have someone they can relate to, and to help people understand that they're not alone, no matter what they are feeling. Hearing Fruit talk has allowed me to realize a lot, and I'm so grateful that he was willing to be so open and explain what's been happening. Recently I've been extremely exhausted, uninterested in doing anything, and very irritable. I realized I was in burnout at the end of the last school year, and I feel as though I've been slowly draining to this point. I've been watching Mr. Fruit for a while, but during my low point, I became hyperfixated on his channel and his videos. My "volcano" has been filling up slowly, with my bad grades, insane amount of medications, parental pressure, and other things that are too personal to talk about. Fruit's videos became a therapy for me, and I used them as an escape. I kept trying to push through my burnout, and similarly to Fruit, I loved to workout to clear my mind and allow me to just think for a moment. Just like Fruit, I started having physical problems. Not nearly as serious, but I had some sprained ankles, broke a toe, and got a concussion. Not at the same time, but they put a stop to my workout plans, and I felt like everything around me had kind of just frozen. On top of that, I had been diagnosed with ADHD and an ED. I was put on so many medications at the same time (depression, anxiety, and attention medications). It honestly felt like everything was falling apart at the same time. The attention medications didn't help at all, but they still gave me side effects, and they only made me more exhausted. I stopped doing schoolwork, stopped going out with friends, stopped posting and talking to friends online, and just took a giant step back from everything, but not in a good way. I ended up isolating myself, and if I went an hour without a friend messaging me and checking up on me, it suddenly felt like they hated me. I've finally been starting to understand that there's a difference between self-isolation and self-care. This video, for me, has been something that helps me understand that there's nothing wrong with me, nothing wrong with being in this situation, and nothing wrong with taking a break. Taking a break is hard. And while I know it's essential for me, part of me refuses to take a break, because there's always the "what-ifs?". "What if my grades drop?" "What if it just makes me lazy?" Listening to Fruit talk, it feels like he's talking directly to that part of me, even if he's simply explaining what's been happening to him. I understand that I need to take a step back and look at the bigger picture, as much as I don't want to, and feel like I only need to focus on the present. I've comprehended that, in the long run, taking a break may result in a drop in my grades, or less productiveness, but afterwards, I will feel so much better and have so much more energy, and I'll be able to get my grades higher and be more productive than I am now, just pushing through the burnout. What I'm trying to say is, it's important to take a break. And it's hard to take a break, because there's the mental block, and the part of you that denies the fact that you even need a break. But it's so important. And I know I'm ranting, but I hope that this is able to help someone. Maybe. Again, I'm sorry if this comes off as selfish. If any of you can relate to this video, my long rant, or anything like this, I hope it will get better. I hope you see that you're not alone, and there are people experiencing the exact same thing as you. And sometimes, you have to hit an all-time low before you can finally move to improving. That's something that's hard to hear. Knowing that you have to go down before you can heal can be discouraging. Looking up and seeing where you came from can make you believe you did something wrong. But there's going to be that path, that separate way to go. A long, drawn-out path. And it leads back to the top, but it takes a long time. You'll need to take breaks, need a helping hand, need a time to rest and look at how far you have to go. That's okay. Because you can always look back and think about how far you've made it up. A long, tiring path, and you made it that far. You did that. You. We love you, Fruit. And to all those who need it, I love you. Even if I don't know you. Have a beautiful day.

[@Null_TJ]

As someone who has helped me develop as a teenager and now going on to an adult since around 2014-2015 to now, its hard but also very warming to see someone who has impacted your life is such a meaningful way to struggle. The anxiety of failing is damning, as someone who was always curious about being passionate about creating content but never doing so do the risk of failure and now considering my 3rd major change in college after premed and 8 years of school didnt seem plausible and computer science isnt for me and now back to pysch with crim justice, its hard, I always feel as if im doing the wrong thing and its taken me forever to recently realize that failure inevitable but what you do after is important. Ive always respected you so much for never giving up on us even through all of the pain and struggle and you have our word that we wont give up on you, I wish the best for you man and keep your head up king and if it lowers we will do anything and everything we can to help hold it up for you until inevitably you do it yourself again. Thank you for everything you have done to impact me and help me grow into someone I can be proud of characteristically and impacting so many others.

[@TheShadowPhoenix]

Thanks for the update. I hope things go better for you and I’m glad the first surgery went well. Best of luck with the next one

[@brightfox5040]

I really appreciate you opening up a lot more than usual towards a KZbin audience. Your videos and the Dream Team made me laugh when I was down and feeling like a disappointment in myself. I hope everyone, new and old, will come back again ready to see the Dream Team and the solo content back

[@deadlock1358]

While I am not necessarily one of the core viewers, i relate so deeply to so much of what you were talking about, with all of the depression, anxiety, adhd, and the whole "dr strange" portion. It's always reassuring to see that you really aren't alone in these struggles. I truly hope you can take everything you've learned about yourself and the world, and continue doing what you love.

[@Mr_.skeleton]

I started watching at 13 and I idolized the dream team. Hearing your podcasts and real talk videos helped me grow mentally and inspired me to get into my best physical shape. I’m forever grateful for the 7 years of content and will rewatch it for as long as I can. I wish you the best of luck. Also I get compliments on my pink content hoodie all the time.

[@Alastor574]

From the bottom of my heart mr fruit you have built a community that I have always dreamed of being in, a community were everyone has fun, can talk to eachother when were having a bad day, and can be a mr fruit family that we all can be apart of and im glad im apart of that family. Much love mr fruit.❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@fist-pumpinkid5816]

Hey, Fruit -- it's awesome to finally see you again! Firing up KZbin this evening, I felt myself almost cry when I saw your thumbnail for the first time in so long. As a loyalist of Fruit Nation, like so many others in this comment section, I've been following you and this channel for probably eight years -- that's through middle school, high school, and into my adult life. I can clearly and unhesitatingly tell you that no other channel has been a more stalwart source of mental stability or joy than yours. No one comes close to how genuine you are, simultaneously as a person and as a content creator. The quality of your friends (who might happen to be coworkers, not the other way around) shows that the way you present yourself on this platform is not a selective endeavor; that you're not trying to fool anybody, and that fact enriches anything you do without fail. You are nothing if not a positive influence on those around you, between those friends, your viewers (new and old), and anyone lucky enough to encounter you. These people commenting above and below me not only accept and tolerate the break you're taking, but I know there are people like me who would fight for you, whether that's buying merch, watching every goddamned video you've ever posted, making donations, or whatever else it took, simply because you've had our backs and our interests at heart for so long. From this video, we know you've still got fire in your heart; a passion for your work even though it's torn you down so often. We know that you're not doing as well as we'd hope for you. And we know that you'll come back, in your own time and in your own way. So, if you're listening, don't feel pressured to come back in 2-3 weeks, or out of fear that you'll lose viewership, interest, or any of that other bullshit. Because we'll be here, no matter what. We love you, bro, and we'll see you when you're ready!

[@elpollodiablo3866]

Take your time Fruit! Would so much rather see that upload notification knowing you're in a place where you're ready to post!

[@hamish3456]

first time seeing you in about a year now, memories have now flushed into me, come home from school loading up the new dream team video, the new single player game video, what ever it was i would come home and load it up and have over 20 mins of escapism and happyness. YOU were the person to get me into destiny, and hey im now a certified destiny veteran now and will keep playing and enjoying a game I proabably never would of played otherwise. So thank you sir, you are and will allwayse be a legend to me and many others who have grown watching you. Now sir im probably won't see you for a while again caue my recommended algorithm is hoesntly soemthing out of this world but when i see a mr fruit video in the future i can confirme i will sit there, watch in in full with a smile on my face that will be a copy of yours.

[@keatonwalker2043]

I have watched every video you have ever made started watching when I was a little kid. You will always be someone I look up to and my favorite content creator. I love following your mental process as it helps me an insane amount. You and I are very similar! If you like doing this I and those who love you would love these 1 on 1s no stress though man. Love you and take care. Happy thanksgiving!

[@marshmallofluff]

As a long time viewer and aspiring content creator who struggles with challenges of my own, I just wanna say I really admire your perseverance and your content is always at its peak when you're enjoying it. Your videos have made me laugh through hard times and are a huge inspiration for me. Thank you for the transparency you're willing to give us, I watched the whole thing and it didn't even feel that long. We're all supporting you Fruit and we'll be here whenever you make you return. :)

[@DXBlackCatXD]

I think this video is gonna help a LOT of people. It definitely helped me out. I remember the first time I heard someone else talk about their depression and ADHD, and ibremember how I suddenly, after 25 years, didn't feel alone anymore. Hearing someone, especially if it's someone like you, talk about mental health struggles always seems to help people out with their own struggles. I can't imagine how hard this must have been for you, but I'm so grateful you did! I hope you feel good soon, but if it takes some time, don't rush it! People will understand.

[@ScrxbLord2001]

1:40:01 I might’ve misunderstood, but I thought you weren’t going to finish the Pokémon series with Rob, which was one of my favorite things so this is awesome thank you

[@chayarchy]

i'm not gonna lie, i'm not even a core viewer. i was mostly here for the destiny and stuck around for some variety content but really only what i was interested in. but i'm here now for the solidarity in burnout. i listened the the whole almost two hours of this video while mindlessly doing tasks that i've been putting off for months, in between sitting on the floor and crying. life is so hard, THANK YOU FOR BEING VOCAL ABOUT IT. being open and honest with your struggles may be hard but you are helping so many people just by talking about it

[@Orrag]

I can’t even begin to describe how much you’ve helped me and made my life so much more bearable Mr. Fruit. As crazy as it is, I started watching you back during your d1 montages, I was 10 years old then, and now I’m 19. I’ve spent my teens watching you on and off over the years, always coming back when I needed the comfort of your voice, your personality, the content you make and the wonderful people you surround yourself with. Just know that however long time passes, that I’ll always hold a special place in my heart for the impact you’ve had on my well-being. I don’t have the words to truly tell you how much it means to me, but I hope it’s enough. Take care, Mr Fruit.

[@yourfriendlyvillain]

Thank you for sharing, I know it's super hard to share things like this especially mental health. I have both ADHD and Bipolar 2 Disorder. I struggle with everything you've shared about your ADHD struggles, and I'm so sorry that you're unable to take stimulants. I know the difference it makes with meds vs unmedicated and it's so damn hard to live with disorders like these. I'm sending so many good vibes for the non-stimulants to help and you're able to take them. As you said, you can't understand what it's truly like unless you experience it yourself. ADHD sucks, and it's debilitating. So I understand you on a soul level lol I see you. I get you. Thank you again for sharing, because the more of us that are able to share and be vunerable helps not only to normalise mental health and general health struggles, it also brings solidarity with communities and people that are going through similar things. You sharing this helped me to finally go and start the process of therapy that I've been needing to do but avoiding. Much love man.

[@jorgerodman6922]

You come first sir take care of yourself and your family that’s most important. You have a tremendous amount of support from all of us, enjoy a break and we’ll be here with joy whenever you shall return

[@wonnie8461]

Burnout & battling depression sucks. I'm going through this right now. I never even thought about being burnt out until you shared & it just clicked. Take your break & focus on you. I still watch your old content & enjoy your stuff. Wish you the best Mr. Fruit