I Received A Large Inheritance Now My Life Is Falling Apart r/Relationships

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[@sharolynwells]

if the girl having the panic attacks has them because of her medication, she needs to talk to her doctor about changing her meds.

[@kellyalves756]

Yeah, something bad is going on with the meds.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

This is _NOT_ at all normal. This needs to be fixed and should not be OPs problem.

[@angeleyesgreen1586]

I was in a medication like this. The doctor noticed, but just added a new med to counter the anxiety, and kept upping the one causing the problem. I got a new doctor... and a new medication, and I'm grateful. Things had gotten so bad I was terrified of leaving my apartment, even to go grocery shopping. As soon a the old meds were out of my system, and the new one was working, that gradually went away. I could get a job again. I could go to my kids' schools. I also got a dna test for medications. Best thing I've ever done. Bad meds are awful.

[@Broeckchen]

Big ole agree. I had a similar problem in 2022 when I tried out new medication for my ADHD. The new medication worked wonders for my partner, who has ADHD as well. For me though? It caused panic attacks. It got even worse whenever I had a legitimate reason to be upset or frightened, because my sensible reaction would then be magnified a lot by the panic. I remember literally screaming my head off from anger once before I collapsed into a heap of tears. It got real bad at night for some reason. The solution was to get my butt back to my doctor and switch medication again. We first tried a different variation of the one I was testing, which did have better results but still gave me lots of panicky moments. So we finally switched back to one that always worked reasonably well for me. Getting on, off or switching medication is a deeply exhausting process and I fully understand why she would be hesitant to do it. Especially if this might possibly be what works best for her so far. But it's vital to try out different treatments and meds if something has strong side effects.

[@OthelloSilvermoon]

The roommate story: Her mental health does not entitle her to harm others. (sleep deprivation is a form of torture)

[@helianabanes4875]

TBH, is seems manipulative AF. Unless she is having night terrors, I don't understand why we are acting like this is OK/normal behavior to be tiptoed around.

[@mandykawaii1646]

It was giving Bella Sawn in new moon after Edward left but, at all hours of the night yk. This OP is Charlie. He is concerned but f*ck…. Just go to a hospital or shut up already.

[@lynsthoughts3576]

An Inheritance is NO ONE'S LOTTERY!! Someone DIED... NO FREEBIES!!! Give if you feel necessary, her family is NOT eligible for this money , nor entitled to it

[@KitsunenoHibi]

The story with the panicking gf is absolute bs. I used to have panic attacks all the time as a child. Like, extreme ones. I'd retch for hours, cry, claw my face, be in hysterics, and even go catatonic. But it was never that often, and I did NOT do what this woman did. She is going to kill OP; sleep deprivation is considered a form of extreme torture and people die. Their brains literally destroy themselves. This girl is pretty much committing a war crime against OP. Interesting how she doesn't keep this to her boyfriend's room as well. She is going to OP's side of the house and terrorizing him night after night, while her boyfriend doesn't even seem to be trying to calm or restrain her. Housemate seems to be getting the sleep he needs, while OP is getting infected ulcers and about to lose his job. After two nights, I would have no sympathy. I know how much panic attacks sucks; every time I had one, I would beg my parents to let me die I was in such irrational agony. I was a child as well; younger than nine. Not an adult who could stop the behavior by just changing meds. After two nights of my sleep being fucked over, I would have come out swinging, tying that bitch to a chair. Those meds are to help her sleep? Then LAY THE FUCK DOWN AND BE QUIET, YOU DEMON.

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

Panic attacks can manifest like this! However that’s when you genuinely need the psych ward. Her own sleep dep is gonna contribute. Like if it’s real she needs to find a bed and get help at a facility. I’ve been in and out of the psych ward since my teens. I do believe a lotta Reddit stories bcz of what I’ve seen, but my flip side opinion is that means you get help. Or cut people off. Or have boundaries. Or go to the cops. Above a certain limit you grow a spine or grow up and own it.

[@KeitieKalopsia]

Those must be some shitty sleep meds because THAT BITCH AIN’T SLEEPIN’

[@Ann_Wall-Chiasson]

If someone posted a picture of me on the internet without my consent and then refused to take it down, I will make myself the biggest pain in the ass in existence. That person will never know rest until they comply.

[@JW-vd4il]

Yes, that was SO WRONG. I do not even care if there was a modesty issue (tho that made it worse). You DO NOT post anything personal without explicit consent! ETA: even before they said "call the cops," I was thinking maybe OP should consider that. As soon as they were so mean and dismissive as to say it like that.... Oh HECK yeah call the cops gurl!!!

[@mysterylovescompany2657]

I mean, Hell, forget even the intimae boundary for a moment - who TF walks into someone else's home & helps themself to _anything_ that they have been expressly forbidden to eat? This guy is not only a creep; he' also doesn't have the respect he was born with, too.

[@JanieBgrand]

With the unstable gf of roommate story… That girl needs mandatory help if she’s having breakdowns nightly!

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

That story with the roommates gf with the “panic attacks”. This is so beyond normal and the fact that she feels entitled to stay there is unhinged. This isn’t her apartment, this unfortunately not _her_ safe place. There was no way OP was TA here and all of the roommates are TA.

[@streamerssaymyname]

Not surprising a serial cheater thinks a woman not being a virgin is just as bad, he can't admit to being the bad guy while cheating on everyone he's been with.

[@Frazzled_Chameleon]

“My life was put on hold due to our first baby! And now I am pregnant again! When will I get to be ME again?” Maybe when you start taking birth control until you’ve discussed having a second child with OP and feel ready for it? Like, sounds like she resents the second baby already.

[@jr5557]

Wow that's your take away from the story. The update was very nice their family life seems a lot better. He is happier he is more involved and active with his family

[@OpticalArxenal]

For the bunker; Ugh, people vilifying gamers. Yes, some people can't moderate it and it's an actual addiciton, but some other people need to just space out and chill with a game and not be around people physically. If the wife is so unhappy popping out kids...stop having kids. It's a 2-way street. The rest is communication and co-operation. Talk shit out like adults.

[@Mary-qf2nl]

They’re not vilifying gamers. He’s literally in the bunker every single day. He’s a parent and a spouse as well and has responsibilities he needs to take care of. Gaming is fine but he can’t put it before his family. Some people do game too much and it puts their loved ones in a difficult position by having to take on more of the work/mental load. Also it doesn’t seem like he was spending time with his family at all. Just working and gaming that’s it.

[@OpticalArxenal]

Yes, the guy in the story is, but the commenter generalized it, that was the part that irked me. Adults need hobbies as well. What's the difference between some rich snob playing golf as a hobby or some other bloke gaming to the same amount of time? That's what annoys me. @@Mary-qf2nl

[@havicmaking]

@@Mary-qf2nl he is W O R K I N G he just happens to be doing it in a bunker. He spends a single hour gaming which if he had an office job might have been spent driving back home and suddenly he's the devil? I'm sorry this is the definition of fatherless behaviour people overcompensating for not having one.

[@TrulySilentLie]

@@Mary-qf2nl Some of your takes here just prove you didn't even listen to half the story, the OP specify the details of his days, what most of the hours spent in the bunker was for. But if you think someone spending 6 hours a day working and 1 hour after playing games, then the rest with his family, is someone who spends LITERALLY NO TIME AT ALL with his family, welcome to the real world where days are 24 hours long and we usually only sleep between 6-10 hours of them.

[@panicwithcompulsion]

@@havicmaking Bruh, the end negotiation was for the wife to get 3 hours of her own. He was clearly downplaying or outright lying about gaming time for 3 hours to be a fair compromise.. And no one is making him out to be the devil. They're calling him out on his lies, selfishness, and neglect of his family. That man was getting almost a full day's worth of free time every week while his wife got literally none. He was rightly clocked as the asshole.

[@terrancemuzic5157]

1:14:48 remember kids once you're married if you're hobbies aren't centered on family they're worthless and you're abandoning your family

[@skyelindsey687]

And don’t you dare find a quiet place where you can work from home because you taking care of your child and wife is more important than earning an income to feed, clothe, and shelter them.

[@manniefresh3425]

No you don’t fully lose yourself cause you have a family

[@AjkoW7]

Yep got the same treatment in my last relationship. Now after splitting I have full custody of our two kids and turns out I’m just as great of a dad with my hobbies as I was without but at least now I’m not miserable.

[@danielwarren7110]

also remember that if you work from home it is not seen as real work, better to work in an office that you have to commute to, better to have 8 hours in an office and a 1 hour each way commute than to work 900 ft from the home on the property... if covid taught people anything that they are there and can interrupt your work whenever they want OP said he has to be logged into the computer system for minimum of 6 hours and spends 6 hours a weekday in the bunker... so he is working less than 8 hours a day but is contracted for a full working day, he said he could log out if he had finished his work... and then spends 4 hours a weekend in their gaming... sorry how many people play golf for a weekend or play football The moral of OPs story is work where you have to commute, then you are not on site at home while you work... working is working...

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

S1: get a prenup that’s very kind to your wife OP. It will prevent the family from trying to wreck and cause a divorce to make her try to take hakf or more fir them to mooch that clearly outlines he will not pay for anything for her family afterwards. Knowing the gravy train ends will help avoid that. You can always do what’s called a post nup if it’s a genuine divorce. It allows you to renegotiate the prenup as long as both parties agree and are civil. That would allow a genuine divorce and you to be able to pick and choose assets waaaaaaay better. With a wack family and money involved it’s a huge risk. I grew up in a nice area and a few family friends were lawyers. I overheard this kinda horror stuff and the lawyers advice at parties growing up

[@katrinasamuels-garrison825]

"Vegan implies that the animal gave consent to provide breast milk." What the what??! 😐😐

[@hoovy4746]

Ok, so saying a man can't control himself really ticks me off.

[@VidGirl88]

Drunk driving is one of the most preventable causes of death. To hell with those selfish trash people.

[@Mama_Bear_of_3]

My brother once drove under the influence. Thankfully there was no accident. But, when my mom went to bail him out, the second he saw her face he started asking the officers to leave him in the cell. Well, when my mom got him home and gave him a verbal lashing, my brother has never did it again.

[@kinggamerz2838]

He still a scumbag for driving under the influence

[@Allantitan]

Tbh I’d be begging the cops to keep me locked up too in that situation

[@Ki11erKitty]

Bunker story. That Whole thing is bull crap. They gas lit the hell out of him! He spent one, repeat ONE hour a day for himself. And he was crucified for it. Blows my mind! Now she's getting THREE hours a day?! Dude is going to burn out. He was Working From Home. Not just down there yanking himself (like one of the comments said). He has a Job. Just because he can do it from home doesn't mean he can just be available to others in the house at all times. EVERY single person ignored the fact that almost all his time in the bunker was his Work Time.

[@IgrisBloodRed91]

Right, and now she’s not only taken over and changed the house to her liking, she’s also gonna take and change the bunker into her own space. The bunker she didn’t even like. Tf is wrong with redditors. Dude was literally working. Also these redditors need to get off of their damn high horses as if they can read every signal a woman puts out that doesn’t know how to hold an actual discussion.

[@IgrisBloodRed91]

Dude basically had to beg her to say what was wrong and she still gave him a load of crap instead of saying something simple like idk “I want some “ME” time since you have “YOU” time.

[@cerberus3k158]

This is infuriating. Why are they calling him useless? All the folks who were "helping him" are absolutely awful. Calling him a burden? I feel like these are just super Saiyan trolls

[@MaddyFish]

My thoughts exactly! I would’ve told the wife “You know what? Fine I’ll just work at the office again, the kid is in school so while you’re here by yourself you can go get a damn job to keep you busy.”💁🏻‍♀️ “oh and by the way, I’m going out for drinks after work for a few hours” the drive to the office and back home after work is going to be more than 6 hours, on top of that if he decided to go out drinking with work buddies he would be gone for HOURS not just taking an hour to himself to play some video games before going back in.

[@angelicakaufman7183]

Wife doesn't get a space of her own! Wife got to decorate literally the entirety of the house that is her space that is her bunker

[@nataschavanzanen]

Yes, having sex with a random man is terrible, it makes you pretty much undateable! OP was lucky to find such a saint of a man who can look past that. Everyone knows it’s ONLY acceptable to do so, if you already have a partner that is dealing with trauma and needs you. NOT if both parties are single and there’s nobody around to get hurt. That’s just gross.

[@Mama_Bear_of_3]

Story 4 (I think).Where brother wasn't allowed at the wedding. If they are in the USA, Cyber bullying/stalking is a criminal offense under American anti-stalking, slander, and harassment laws. So, OP needs to press charges.

[@rachelm2657]

Breast milk is milk and if anything is more healthy for people than cow milk. That being said the idea that you said it was for the baby and he ate one even when you said no is the issue. Then he said it was vegan...like I wasn't worried if it was going to hurt you dude. The issue is he is strealing your labor of producing and collecting the milk and food out of your babies mouth.

[@ohboy-zi1yf]

after weaning, breast milk is not more healthy for humans than cows milk

[@penniegwin1320]

That story to me feels like father in law is sexualizing breastfeeding and anyone who breastfeeds. Sounds to me that he gets off on trying breast milk and making everyone feel uncomfortable and unsafe. So creepy.

[@countrygirl7402]

This was completely sexualized. It has nothing to do with nutrition. He has a lactation fetish. The MIL even admitted she had to lock him out so she could breastfeed their children, and he lost a job for perving on a woman at work! This was not a food thing. This was him getting his rocks off. Plain and simple, and it's so creepy it makes you just want to grab your child and run as far and fast as you can. Forever.

[@PrimateProductions]

It is not made for adults to consume

[@theredditshow8951]

I would call the ambulance on the roommate story. She’d be committed every time.

[@GreenKnight1982]

If your in-laws are trying to pry out the amount of money you are worth they don't love you whatsoever they love your money and you honestly need to rethink your entire relationship unless your significant other is willing to cut them off completely

[@catsncrows]

I'm always suprised/not suprised how scratching and biting messy families will fight to normalize things which often includes alcohol issues, like screaming at your child at their boyfriend's house being all unhinged in public, like hello, people will notice!

[@skyelindsey687]

So let me get this straight. He got the house for a ridiculously low price, took the time to find and unbury the bunker, renovated that for his office instead of needlessly taking up a room in the house that they now need for the incoming child, and everyone is upset that he’s spending too much time down there when there’s ways for his wife to reach him should she need him. And the commenters clearly missed where he stated most of his time down there is him working from home and his wife can still reach him if there’s an emergency. OP is NTA for going to the bunker for his work/his lean time. And nothing states that she can’t also go into the bunker or whatever room she set up in house for her to escape to. 6 hrs (ETA for work) during the week days and 4 on weekend days still leaves 10 awake hrs on average each day of being with the family. The wife could easily take 4-6 of those hrs to do her own thing. ETA: ALSO if y’all can’t handle a gamer doing his hobby DONT DATE/MARRY A GAMER. I’m sick and tired of people getting pissed at gamers doing their own thing and then destroying their systems. And again he doesn’t spend that much time in the bunker. And she could still get away when he’s there. It sounds like she chose not to have that unwind time. Also you can’t really take care of your child while you are working, you know earning an income. And essentially the end of it is he has less free time to be on his own and she has more free time than him. Redditers are idiots when it comes to gamers and expect people to know things without the spouse ever communicating. Also they still have missed that the majority of his bunker time is WORKING, you know, providing the income that allows her to be a stay at home mom

[@manniefresh3425]

Yeah people crap on gamers when it’s one of the most cost effective hobbies and he’s literally still home and just turn it off if needed. Plenty of other people have hobbies that are equally unproductive but consider it better than gaming for some odd reason

[@vanessashimoni6548]

You seem triggered, the criticism must have hit close to home.

[@AlyssaAllen.a]

I rolled my eyes so hard when she said she was pregnant.

[@LemonyFresh2000]

Bro same. Like, firstly, for the love of God people, I don't know why hooking up with your recent ex is so common, but if you're going to, INSIST ON PROTECTION THAT YOU PROVIDE. ESPECIALLY if they are upset about the relationship ending.

[@AlyssaAllen.a]

@@LemonyFresh2000 Exactly!! Come on!

[@LemonyFresh2000]

@@AlyssaAllen.a BUT DON'T COME IN!!!! Lmfao

[@AlyssaAllen.a]

@@LemonyFresh2000 🤣😅😂 you're wild

[@laurendaly8835]

Bunker: I’m 100% against the weaponized incompetence and “I make the money so I don’t have to parent” dads but that is NOT what this guy is doing. She should count herself lucky that he not only gets to work from home and can help when she calls, but that he also usually only works 6 hours a day. Most people have an hour commute on top of 8-10hrs of work. Boohoo he takes one/two hours to have a hobby. The child is in kindergarden, what is she doing with that time where she can’t read a book? And what tf is she talking about with where is her bunker?? It’s THE WHOLE HOUSE. You have all the power in the world to add as many bookshelves as you want to it, you have all the power to buy books to fill them, why does he need to read your mind and buy them for you?? I absolutely hate that Reddit automatically just rips on dads

[@BrennanCh06]

Yeah, shes being a prima Donna

[@clockwork3494]

The bunker story still kinda gives me weird vibes. Overall I think it's great they talked and worked things out but the wife's comment about "almost feeling like herself again then suddenly getting pregnant and it starts all over again" feels like it flew over everyone's head. (1:15:48) It just comes off as her complaining about being pregnant and that's why she's unable to be herself and I just.. huh? If she didn't want to get pregnant again so she could be herself then why didn't they consider discussing forms of birth control prior to adult fun time? I don't really think OP was an AH either, he spends at most 7 hours a week day in the bunker, 6 working and 1 recreational which is 35 hours a week. 30 hours is usually the average weekly working hours (at least here in Australia) and OP only spends 5 hours across 5 days on games, which isn't even a quarter of a single day. Admittedly 8 hours a weekend seems a little more than I'd spend on games but a total of 13 hours a week spent on games really isn't that long either.. The wife has a direct way to contact him should there be an emergency and overall 7 hours away per week day is actually pretty reasonable, there are people out there that work far longer hours or even travel the globe for work, what would the wife do if OP had a job position like that instead? In the end I don't mean to be rude but the wife just seems like she might need a bit of therapy with her feelings towards the pregnancy, because it seems like she's not just unhappy that OP is "absent in the bunker" but also the fact she's pregnant again.

[@skyelindsey687]

Yep. Even in America the average full time work week is 40 hrs. He’s spending 30-40 hrs a week working with it being majority 30 hrs. He’s not going down there to watch porn or screw off all responsibility for those 4-7 hrs, he’s unwinding with the majority of the time making a living. And even then that leaves on average 10 awake hrs a day with his family, which the wife could’ve gone to do her own thing of reading a book or taking a bath or playing Sims

[@harrycheetham]

I agree, the wife needs therapy and is making it all about her.

[@hoovy4746]

I highly agree, also she could have just talked to him about it instead of blowing up on him. A KEY part of ANY relationship is communication, platonic or not, I admit I'm not entirely good with communication, but I at least try to bring up problems with my roommates instead of blowing up at them.

[@manniefresh3425]

I agree, people comments demonizing this guy seemed really odd to me. I would bet if he went to work he wouldn’t be as available given the time it would take for him to drive and then the time in the office. 6 hours in office with him at home and assessable seems way better. More than likely she’s jealous in that it seems he gets to have an escape and she doesn’t, also probably considers his time working as him having time to himself so the even more jealous as she sees him having soo much time to himself even though he’s working.

[@ZombieSazza]

I’m sadly not surprised Reddit is dumping on him, this happens so often when a male writes a story, he gets dumped on and harassed.

[@TheKingOfRuckus]

"This man has been given ample-" Bruh....I lol'd

[@B4dr4bbit]

The breast milk story is wierrd and the dad is odd Also as someone who likes muffins and is curious, i too woulf wanna try the muffin. Breast milk or not he is in the wrong for eating food that wasnt for him. Also his lactation fixation makes me feel like the man needs some therapy

[@peggyseabrun4829]

Last story, I'm not Muslim and i would feel violated if this was done to me. I hope OP goes scorched earth on this

[@JW-vd4il]

Me too not Muslim and this is still all so wrong. I worked somewhere with a few Muslim women who wore hijabs. One day I was going into the bathroom and as I opened the door I saw one of the Muslim women I knew adjusting her hijab AND I COULD SEE HER HAIR! I shut the door so fast!!! I am a white American non-Muslim woman and I felt like I had accidentally opened a door where a man might see a woman too naked or midst of changing! Kinda funny it was just her hair and she was okay too. 😂 And I know women can see, but I was horrified I opened a door where a man might see. So, for this story, THAT respect is due but also!... even LEAVING OUT the personal or religious restrictions And PEEPING... DON'T PUT ANYBODY'S PHOTO or personal info online without consent! WTF.

[@dbz7103]

Islam is an ideology, not a race. It’s perfectly fine to feel disgusted when seeing hijab and knowing its history. Peeping at hair is NOT the same as exposed private areas. Immigrants conform to OUR beloved culture, not the other way around.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

1:01:04 I’m over here shocked that it’s only been a year and OPs father is saying just get over it? That entire family are POS.

[@nitemare1004]

the drunk driving story: omfg those aren't parents, they're just kids rooting for the cool kid to do more crazy shit for their amusement. holy hell, my blood boiled hearing their stupidity. my uncle (rip) died because of a drunk driver and two others died that night. and because the a$$hat was drunk he (somehow) lived, luckily, he was charged and is now doing MANY years.

[@bcase5328]

That family has a "Golden Child" problem. Sister, OP, would be better off to leave on cut contact, because Parents don't want to change and things will end badly. All that family will give OP is to make her their scapegoat.

[@ClearandHealthyBoundaries]

The OP in the 2nd to last post babytrapped herself.

[@rhondasisco-cleveland2665]

I’ve never heard of a panic attack that has a normal duration & time of occurrence. I’ve never heard of one like a tantrum either.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

The parents of the drunk driving are so disgusting! Their attitude regarding the incident and them wanting to throw a party is so inappropriate.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

Not the former addict husband playing the perfect husband for his friends! Ugh! And her mom not speaking to her is so gross. This man is fully abusive! He deserves to be on his own! I’m so happy whoever he was away with held him accountable.

[@HZ-fg9sf]

Second to last story about the girl with the fiance off meds: She is soooo naive. Smh She is far too "kind" in the way she is looking at the situation and will ultimately end up stuck in that abusive relationship. If the fiance can act nice in front of his friends and then go back to ordering her around when they are gone, it isn't the meds. That hun is him revealing to you who he really is and she proceeds to almost get out and then baby trap herself. Wtf. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Then he acts nice to lure her back in when she decides to leave him and she falls for that classic trick. This is just a repeat of so many stories we see and hear about. I see she is really young so clearly doesn't realize it but I can't believe she actively chooses to ignore the comments warning her about the dangerous position she is putting herself in.

[@adrienneb.4710]

Story 1. There is only so understanding that you can expect a person to be when you are depriving them of sleep night after night.

[@sharolynwells]

WTG to the mom with a gay son, accepting him. My daughter is bisexual and I accepted her from day 1.

[@yeetnama9094]

Aka your daughter is an attention seeker and so are you.

[@MrBrachiatingApe]

When my sister came out, it was sad to see how worried she was that we might not accept her. Not because my brothers, parents, or I gave her any specific reason to fear our reactions. In her case, she'd had a couple "friends" project their on trauma onto her circumstances, their experiences onto her expectations. I was...maybe 15? 16? I told her she was my sister, and whoever made her happy was fine by me. That I'd always liked her boyfriends and had every reason to believe that I'd like her girlfriends, too. As family, that's what you do. Or should do.

[@KazumiKiguma]

The wedding pic one, that's literally illegal, as in when there's an expected level of privacy, any attempts to go around that such as voyeurism or eavesdropping is illegal.

[@HeatherQuinn-Psykhae]

Ngl the fact that his wife made their house and immediately built a perfect little shed after being told he'd built her, her own space is so sweet This man needs to do everything he can to keep his wife happy she's a good woman

[@drewthistlethwaite8909]

Sleep deprived OP: holy crap the way he was so ready to save her the first two nights tho. Like dudes so patient and understanding about mental illness but seems unaware how to politely handle this. I get it. He gets it needs to stop but he’s also not gonna hurt someone whose hurt. I feel like some men are so self aware of how scared women can be and have to be in certain situations, it does cause them to be passive. And he’s just sensitive to the supposed mental health crisis. But again him being willing to absolutely turn on his roomate and how he tried to approach it privé he’s a very nice person.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

The dude who didn’t go to his brothers wedding. The brother sucks for going along with his fiancé and for blaming OP for anything that happened. I also don’t get the in-laws bullying OP and OPs bf. OP didn’t go, isn’t bothering people and these disgusting people find that offensive. I also don’t get why the mother cares so much now when OP stated this isn’t the first time his sexuality caused him to be excluded.

[@Project_KN1GHT]

1:01:24 ARE YOU SERIOUS??? THE BEST FRIEND DIED *LESS THAN A YEAR AGO*??? That is such an awful situation. Screw the family and the brother.

[@FinnishLapphund]

1st story: OP's mother wasn't wrong, sister + brother could trust OP as in that he was relatively quick to realise that the inheritance also has its downsides, and that they need to find ways to take control of the situation, before they either lost their inheritances, or the situation took control over them the same way it had their mother. Edited to add: That he then judging by another reply, who had found an even later update, still had problems, got divorced etc, just shows that even with good advice, it's easy to make similar mistakes that others who inherit or wins money have done.

[@ZomBeeQueeen]

Story 1: Money doesn’t change you. It just gives you a better opportunity to show what person you are. Mom sounded so vile. I hope OP gets some therapy with his money. No one should love somebody that hateful just because “family.”

[@lindtplease1693]

I don't get why people are surprised at recipes for babies containing breast milk. It's quite common. It is however not so common for creepy FIL to impose his kink on his DIL.

[@RickyMaveety]

Let me guess … the girl screaming and crying at night is on Wellbutrin. They aren’t panic attacks. They are Night Terrors, and they are awful. I was on that medication and it was awful. I changed my medication and that solved the problem.

[@warpthumr47]

To the OP with the alcoholic drunk driver brother & co-dependent, enabling parents: my older brother was in a car that was t-boned on March 17, 1979, during his senior year of high school by a drunk 18 y.o. named Richard Wimmer, going an estimated 90 mph on a 35 mph street. He was 17 & was going to go to college on a full ride golf & academic scholarship. He made Tiger Woods look like a newbie. He wasn't wearing a seatbelt (this was 1979 & there was no seatbelt law in our state) & was thrown from the car. He suffered a TBI, fractured hip, & ruptured spleen. He was expected to be DOA to the hospital. He remained in a coma for 9 days & was in the hospital for a total of 18 days. He had to relearn how to talk, crawl, then walked with crutches for months. He had a tutor at home & was able to graduate bc the school waived the 1 elective credit He was missing. He graduated, walking in on crutches to a standing ovation, including his classmates. He survived, but his life & future was entirely destroyed...at 17. There wasn't as much known about TBIs back then & he tried to go to college b4 he was ready. He went a college in Texas...where the drinking age is only 18, ffs (sorry Texas folks, but that is as effed up as 18 being allowed to by assault rifles). He drank alcohol to "cope" with the stress. You can probably guess the trajectory of his life from there on. He struggled & tried to have a normal life, but eventually, it became too much & he committed suicide when he 50 years old. He was living in a mobile home on my parents' property & Mom found him when she was worried that she hadn't seen him for almost 16 hours. She never got over that. My younger brother & I have never gotten over it & the 45th anniversary is coming up in just 9 days. I was 15 when it happened & am now 60. My younger brother is 59. I hope Richard Wimmer has had as shitty of a life as he caused my brother to have bc he 100% killed my brother. It just took 33 years. You never "get over" losing the people that you love. You just learn to continue on without them, but a part of your joy is forever gone. Our mother couldn't bear to ever bury or even buy an urn for Doug's cremains. She passed away on January 30 & per her wishes, we will be burying her cremains with our father's & bury our brother's cremains in the plot next to our parents. She wanted to be buried with both, but that isn't legally allowed. I am buying the plot next to Doug & my younger brother is buying the one next to me, so we will eventually all be together, which we both agree both of our parents would want. No, you never get over losing the people you love. I'm sitting here crying while typing this. No one else gets to dictate how you grieve.

[@hyzenthlayrose2176]

Tbh I think the idea of making food with breast milk as a recipe for babies is pretty clever and creative. But only for babies. Father-in-law is a repulsive pervert.

[@lucyann1573]

Yeah...not a surprise twist at all. That 21 year old isn't going any damn where. She went right back to that guy, slept with him and has now brought a kid into this BS. With the guy who wouldn't let her talk to her family alone. Awesome 👏

[@raptoress6131]

I'd love to have a problem arising from receiving a large inheritance tbh

[@Batmanapplejax]

Story 1 has an update that should have been included. It’s not good. Married GF. Total gold digger, cheated on him, ended up spending a ton of money on her family, was sued by his stepfather and brother who contested the will, etc. Oof. Almost makes me not want to ever be rich. Almost

[@thedarknessofnana]

The bunker husband story: That one comment who said most women find being a gamer to be a dealbreaker? Speak for yourself. I’m a woman and I game and it’s honestly a dealbreaker to me if my SO _doesn’t_ game. 😂 I need someone who’ll understand why I’m gaming for several hours when a new game comes out.

[@luizad2277]

Baby rice! Yuuuuk! That is the worst for babies? The older generation needs to get off the food industry propaganda

[@lkayh]

Inheritance story: for the “loose money” that is not going to be poured back into the business, see a financial adviser (IDC if you think you’re great at this stuff-it really is different when it’s your money). Personally, I’d pay off the mortgage and set up an account that is just for paying expenses. Then set up a an annuity that doles out the money for those expenses to the account on a regular basis. Put the rest in a trust that can only be accessed by you under specific circumstances (whatever you choose-you can take out as much as you like, whenever you like, for whatever reason you like-and just don’t spread those details so people don’t start figuring out how to spend it). Then you can tell people that all the money is tied up and you can’t get your hands on it right now. It’s really none of their business how that works.

[@BrennanCh06]

Poor bunker bro, hes got nothing but the bunker and somehow thats more than the whole house

[@vetaroberts3333]

Don’t trust him he will say whatever you want to hear

[@vetaroberts3333]

Remember what he did to you

[@bunnycrypted6160]

1:24:09 I feel like markee only read the angry feminists on this post and that pissed me off because men aren’t actually taught this stuff as hard as that is to believe and I know he fucked up, but he changed the problematic behavior, so why can’t that be good enough?

[@francinetitherington4060]

Stayed home from the wedding: I never understand those "Christian" relatives in these stories act out like they do. As Christians, we are taught to Hate the Sin BUT Love the Sinner. So, even if they believe the OP's sexuality is a sin, this doesn't sound very loving. Jesus would not approve! Sounds more like they are practicing Churchianity than Christianity.

[@VSE4me1]

I’m thinking OP should set up a trust for fiancé’s family and let fiancé make decisions about it.

[@wplains]

Money brings out the worst in people. Somehow, they all think they have a right to someone else’s windfall!

[@francit4856]

Abandoned at 8. No way is OP TA. Also it was good that OP didn't go to the "Reunion" because it would have been opening up bad memories and resentments only for the sake of your Sperm Doners 5th marriage. He doesn't get to USE you for appearances. You didn't need that and you certainly don't need that or him.

[@kellyalves756]

1:41:08 Guy’s away on business, that’s the perfect time to change all the locks. And like that person said, screenshot everything.

[@dianecheney4141]

Get a financial planner. Create a trust fund for family emergencies and send them to the trustor of the fund to get emergency funds

[@evarodriguez4319]

Money is in a trust. I'm unable to access it fully. I will be getting a portion each month. That's it.

[@kateajurors8640]

The one with the screaming girlfriend causing sleep disturbances period I would probably record the episodes and then get a big asterio and blare the episodes when they are trying to sleep and the other roommates as well. just playing back exactly what you hear. I would be so f****** petty Though because every time she would be having an episode I would get a can of liquid a** and one of those little flimsy tubes to pop on the front and I would spray it up underneath their door every time the episode went on for more than 5 minutes period she doesn't live there she doesn't pay rent to alleviate you and your straying she doesn't get to impact your life in living condition

[@MazzaEliLi7406]

Story 1: It is my understanding that one side effect of longterm "weed" use (abuse) is paranoia & that alcohol is a depressive. OP would be well advised to consider going tee-total because he may have inherited his mothers adictive tendencies. Help is out there. Please get help OP. Cheers.

[@RandomNexus]

So many people having random, unprotected sex. WTF? *_epic facepalming into infinity_*

[@rhondasisco-cleveland2665]

If it’s true, I feel for the kid. Every normal person needs love and to feel safe Family is supposed to be safe.

[@JanieBgrand]

She’s got more class in her little finger than OP will ever have.

[@kmon1324]

Story 1. Never reveal having or inheriting wealth.

[@janeecoburn5691]

His girlfriends nightime issues sounds like night terrors. My 7 year old daughter has severe night terrors none Rem sleep and sleep walking, they happen almost every night screaming yelling getting out of bed they happen from 10-1130 pm. She should go to a sleep clinic to have test done.

[@bridgetdebourgh5698]

Hey Markee 👋 Have a great day 👍 Have a great night/day everyone 👋🤗

[@mzjem7218]

WTH he’s abusive and you still slept with him after all the abuse. Having a freaking baby 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@annem7806]

2) boundaries are boundaries. He has lost all trust. Any blowback, threaten to publish his actions. Do u have any SIL that need to know?

[@theresaschuebel5151]

My grandmother died on January 2nd 1971, and my grandfather on June 19th 1971. Until the day he died February 24th 2007 those 2 days plus their birthdays March 15th and March 29th were bad days for my dad. My youngest and her boyfriend both 25 who have known each other since they were 4 years old are both are gamers. They find time to game together and he is also an avid fisherman and hunter and she was an indoor girl because she is a bookworm. She is now more like me then she had been.

[@Pootypatooty]

38:39 so so crazy I’ve never ever had a panic attack that’s made me insane and abusive

[@jamesmyles4540]

The bunker story. The wife said 1 line in particular that made me raise an eyebrow. "When do o just get to be me again?" You dont. Kids change things and if you cant grasp that concept you should not have had them.

[@jamesmyles4540]

Many of the commenters drive me crazy but the one that was bitching about him asking about mental load and how nobody his entire life had ever mentioned the concept "Nobody taught me about it, i looked it up and found the resources myself" THE PEOPLE WHO MADE THE RESOURCES TAUGHT YOU!

[@theajaxs720]

Having money doesn't fix every problem, it just changes the list of problems.

[@grahamNicholls-u6v]

Ring the police even if you don’t go through with the case she will get a lesson.

[@waterdragondelta]

thank you for this ^^

[@lina9535]

I feel sorry for OP who lost their friend to a drunk driver. My dad passed when I was 9 from liver failure, and it's been 21 years and it still hurts. I did go to therapy of some kind (it was some child psychologist) for I think almost 3 years after he passed.

[@DiscoTimelordASD]

I hope the room mate recieved appropriate assistance for her sleep disorder as well as moving out.

[@francit4856]

2nd Families???? If I had/could afford a Second Family, it would be a 1bedroom house at the beach with a fireplace and a cat.

[@vetaroberts3333]

Copy everything, and make a plan. Take everything from him

[@vetaroberts3333]

Lawyer lawyers

[@AllyPenguin]

Partner recovering story: I hope she doesn't go back to him. My ex is/was an emotionally unpredictable alcoholic (among other things) and we broke up because of one of his episodes. Long story short, he didn't come to a vacation with us, stayed home to drink, neglected my cats, and threatened to kill himself, me and my daughter. Before this I always accepted his apologies, accepted that it was his illness doing the bad behavior, but that was the final straw for me. However, after that holiday season (6 months later) and after his performance that he was "sorry for hurting me" and "better" i gave him another chance. He showed me who he was again. Only this time, he doubled down instead of apologizing. He told me I was going to end up alone because everyone has problems. It was really satisfying to walk away again and not feel any guilt. I truly hope she doesn't find herself in a similar situation.

[@kyriacarica5862]

Redditors heard “gamer” and started foaming at the mouth. That first comment after the update was chastised OP even after the update was positive and the wife was happy. What else was he supposed to do? Self-flagging while kneeling on nails??

[@destinylouise7931]

What OP can do from the money if he wants to be generous to her family is consult a financial advisor. Then set up trust for her of his gf family members that have to go through a financial advisor. If they blow their trusts then they are on their own. I had a family member do that. Some blew the money and the answer after that was no.

[@ofekma12345]

the comments about the bunker made me mad, full of people who just want to aim their righout anger at anyone. They don't want people to do better they want to tear them down, the bunker guy had a long talk with his wife where she aired all her frusrations, took and still takes steps to be better, thanked the commenters for their advice and information and said that he didn't know but glad he does now. He introspected, communicated, apologized and improved his behavior. What more can you ask from him??? Are you mad because he said that no one told him about mental load? "you could have googled it" he didn't even KNOW THAT THE TERM EXISTED UP UNTIL NOW! How do you google something you don't know is even a thing? he hasn't made excuses, he explained himself, he was taught certain things that were very lacking and outdated, he is learning to do better now. Good! Do you know how comments like those affect people who actively make an effort to improve themselves, simply because they weren't perfect from the beginning? they make them discouraged, unmotivated, not wanting to try because both effort and lack of effort get an angry reaction!

[@thegimpygamer]

The one about not attending the wedding because he was gay turned out to be a hoax. Just someone trying to drum up hate.

[@flamelily2086]

If I cane into a large sum of money for any reason I would get financial advice and invest it. If people came with their hands out I would just tell them the money was tied up and not available. My friends cousin had money that was invested in different ways and every 10. years he would get a laege lump sum that he could use or reinvest.

[@johnjr7070]

STORY 1.Grow a spine and get out of the internet,Destined to mess up.

[@DollyDimples87]

Panic attacks is nothing you can do but to ride them out....she needs to see a therapists and get onto medications asap.

[@nathankennedy3290]

Did "vegan" suddenly get a new definition?

[@Luve2020]

I made breast milk stuff for my daughter all the time. I Litterally put it in her baby oatmeal when she started to eat. Sometimes when I ran out of milk I used my own milk in my coffee or if we were out and they only had cow milk. I had to be dairy free bc of my daughter’s allergies. It’s not weird, it’s just milk. Someone being a perv about it IS weird, it’s like being turned on by a dairy cow….

[@lkayh]

The story about the intimate picture taken through a window with closed curtains… sorry, but the police should be called. She isn’t “like” a peeping Tom. She IS a peeping Tom and she committed a crime. Call the cops. Seriously. Something is wrong with that girl-and the sister who “gave her permission” to do this. This is really, really offensive behavior.

[@meiimacca4054]

Im sorry, not sorry but for the bunker story shes whining about being pregnant when it takes 2 people to make a baby and she kept it so she clearly wanted it. She chose not to be a person of her own in that regard. Also, if hes so useless and a burden, why breed with him again? I have little sympathy for her.

[@zander8018]

A peeping Tom... family or not....is still a criminal. They have no respect for you .... remember this lesson....