I Want to be a U.S Citizen

[@goddepersonno3782]

I really don't know how I'm supposed to pitch this channel to anyone after this "well you see, he's a famous Australian journalist who fights against corruption and is responsible for the takedown of several corrupt politicians but he also makes weekly slop reaction videos about youtube shorts and he also does random online activities relating to American politics

[@bruhsecutor]

I mean peeps gotta pay the bills and shit, y'know? The youtube meta is to do slop if you have a following that will watch even without the algo pushing you.

[@Animebryan2]

He'd have a field day covering the corruption in our government. He just needs to stay clear of the liberals.

[@nicholaslogan6840]

"He's a journalist and a comedian, linking his talents in a KZbin channel." There. You may have this.

[@dahalofreeek]

When I subscribed to this channel, it was comedy skits about drinking goon.

[@bergfruehling]

Also he puts on a wig and imitates Australian wine mums.

[@k3ynan316]

Legally mandated algorithm engagement

[@itsalwayssunnyinpahoa7631]

Aye, indeed.

[@baseder514]

Amazing

[@jordonAh]

Algorithm has hid this for 2 days from me.

[@TMAmick]

Here here

[@TMAmick]

Did you see he announced on truth social last night after a two hour conversation with Trudeau that he’s going to tax Mexico and Canada 25% flat tariff across the board?? I think that’s a good sign for Australia because we need the iron ore!

[@units9167]

Don't tell John Freedom about this

[@KlazGuy]

John Freedom sounds like John Freeman's cousin

[@billylionisnotagoat]

@@KlazGuy is that Sally slavery's brother?

[@OB.x]

John Freedom already knows. He's everywhere. waiting in the shadows.

[@TheImmediatePastPrez]

​@KlazGuy "its time for me to live up to my family name and face full life consequences"

[@a9503128]

You should see the Australian citizenship test, thinly veiled English as a second language test.

[@RictusHolloweye]

Didn't John Howard turn it into a cricket trivia test?

[@singithi8556]

It's funny how all the self-hating white Australians decry Australia's citizenship but ESL migrants think it's fairly reasonable.

[@InnuendoXP]

Nah it's basically sports trivia

[@fearsomewarengine8228]

You should see the Danish one, it's basically a pub quiz that hasn't been updated since the 80s

[@KironVB]

Literally passed it in about 30 seconds.

[@BreadGloves4075]

Good job passing that test, but we are gonna need you to also go through the official US Citizenship obstacle course. It's a straight, flat road with nothing on it that spans all of about 200ft (it's probably a little more that a meter), and in order to win you need to get to the end while spending as much money as possible in the several outlet stores and fast food chains we strategically placed along the path. If you can't get to the end before complaining about your feet hurting more than once then you will be fired out of a cannon back to.. uh.. you know.. that one country with the kangaroos. Anyways, please meet at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW, Washington, DC 20500, and if the guys out front don't let you in at first just give them the secret code," I have a bomb" and they will help you out. Good luck soldier!

[@thatonelad4594]

Does it count if I use my huge gas guzzling truck?

[@foxglov3_]

Thank you for probably the funniest youtube comment I've read in ages. I may be stoned, but my tears of laugher are real.

[@BreadGloves4075]

@@thatonelad4594 All motor vehicles are allowed, but your exhaust pipe will need to be monitored to make sure you are producing an acceptable amount of CO2 or "Freedom Fumes". Also you will need to come to a complete stop at every yield sign or it doesn't count!

[@CripplersGrave]

I’m dead bro. Make sure you go to nike, apple, Macy’s, Walmart, and every god dam store it doesn’t matter hollister god dam it wooooo bed bath and beyond no problem 65,000

[@stucktj]

16:07 unfortunately slavery is still not outlawed completely. The 13th amendment has a caveat, "Except as punishment for a crime" and that's why we have the highest incarceration rate in the world.

[@doithimaceabhard7457]

TMYK

[@crossboy]

yeah and california had a ballot measure to outlaw slavery and get rid of the exception, it's currently a CLOSE CALL.5 million people said to keep it, 4.1 million said to outlaw so far (~50% of expected vote). insanity

[@Crendermin]

The US has the highest count of incarcerations in the world, but El Salvador has the highest rate of incarceration. Rate is the number of incarcerated per 100,000 citizens, which El Salvador has 1,659 per 100,000 while the US has 541 per 100,000 This is of course if you take the assumed incarceration counts in China at face value, in which even modest estimates only put them slightly lower than the US incarceration count.

[@jtothemaurednik]

to be clear the quote there isn’t paraphrasing.

[@cascadeblue9]

@@wealllikeitsomilkit4301 read the god damn amendment yourself

[@friendlyjordies]

I was live: kzbin.infoSIpjQG_d85U I'm now on my podcast channel: kzbin.info/www/bejne/on29oaF6aL9snsU

[@rabidL3M0NS]

Check it for moles or what?

[@Brendan77able]

Election today, Civil War tomorrow... should be a fun week of social media.

[@tome-the-great]

oi, send me money jordies, or memes.

[@idkyet3573]

Gee, who knows if the guy who lost the last two times will lose again. I wonder.

[@williammurry2593]

On the Ben Franklin thing the other thing is most famous for is how much he f*cked apparently it was a lot

[@Elemblue2]

I ignored all other election videos to watch this one.

[@ZeroCrystal]

4:46 "Petitioning the Government leads to pants on cows." As an American, I'm willing to give that a green check mark because it's lateral thinking and illustrates usage of the First Amendment. Technically correct, the best kind of correct.

[@mickey4125]

A lovely response hahaha

[@krisvind1715]

"name one state that borders Canada" .. Denmark

[@Miron_Marnic]

Not wrong tho

[@Flaspect_]

I saw the title, and no, no you don't. Edit: dang this is the most likes I've gotten on a comment ever. (1.4k atm)

[@JRWeezy84]

Says the dirty commie...

[@PinkTuskedMammoth]

right? Even if you thought you wanted to be an American just remember youre joining the ranks of people who are simultaneously seen as the biggest idiots in the world and also the biggest influence, which means most everyone hates us (or it at least feels that way) and it's pretty exhausting not knowing what your future is going to be like knowing the VAST majority of the people who live here all complain about the government but then turn around and don't bother to ever vote. It's insane how many of us have this ability and just squander it. VOTE! It is the 1 actual thing our grandfathers and great grandfathers fought and died to defend.

[@adenoutdoors5447]

What’s wrong with America. I’m curious (I’m from Australia)

[@the_jjabberwock]

@@adenoutdoors5447Me as well.

[@imainskyblock4138]

@@adenoutdoors5447 from my personal experience, most people seem to mention the shooting rates and safety as a big reason. Regardless of the data, I think the idea of baring arms seems to make people pretty nervous. Obviously some people LOVE the guns, so it's not a fullproof reasoning, but you prolly get the point.

[@akorn1]

16:12 as an American who read the constitution, you do NOT have the right to not be a slave; rather, you have the right to not be a slave UNLESS you commit a crime. Then you can be.

[@the_quadracorn]

The Civil war question is hilarious. Slavery, State's Rights, Economic reasons... So Slavery, state's rights to have slavery, and the effect of banning slavery on the economy

[@joeb6986]

Millions of southerners who couldn't afford slaves definitely volunteered to fight and support a war for slavery. Who owned the slave ships is a better question.

[@BakrEvon]

​​@@joeb6986​ The U.S. southeast is called the Bible belt because of the ingraining of Christian beliefs the wealthy elite enacted on both their slaves and the rest of the regular citizens who couldn't read The perspective those elites pushed was that black people were inherently subservient to white people, and they took advantage of a bunch if uneducated and indoctrinated people in an attempt to sustain an economy built on people as property The ship owners, made of of European and American citizens who traded slaves from African countries to the Americas are to a large of of the blame for slavery as it happened, but the focus was on the Civil War A bunch of brainwashed people thought they were fighting a divine fight The elites in power at the time of the war were like 2ndish generation slave owners who had this as their "heritage," and likely also bought into the biblical bullcrap Much like the Middle East for the past forever, and the vocal majority of the current Republican party, unfortunately

[@Vivi_9]

@@joeb6986 southerners in the US being misled and actively fighting for something that won't benefit them would never happen

[@yaboye3791]

​@@joeb6986 Spainards, italians, englishmen, americans... Did i miss any nationality per chance?

[@AdmiralGordon]

@@yaboye3791 Don't forget the former slaves who got their freedom and then became plantation owners

[@BillinSD]

Fly to Mexico City. Take a connection to Tijuana. Walk east about 1 hour, and North 1 hour. WELCOME TO CALIFORNIA

[@DipseyDex]

Funny story about that. My mom trecked on foot from a donkey show in Tijuana with my aunt back to san diego. She lost her passport and was a british citizen, not american. So she had to border jump to get back to us kids in san diego. So my british mother is technically a border hopper.

[@ninthee7113]

no plz no no nooo

[@TheRealMycanthrope]

​@@DipseyDexI'm sorry, from a DONKEY SHOW? Damn bro, your mum is freaky.

[@napalmholocaust9093]

Whatever. I've been harassed by a swat team looking squad of border patrol at the ocean park at the border. They weren't f'n around.

[@BillinSD]

@napalmholocaust9093 I said walk east not west. The park you mention is west.

[@Psivox69]

0:13 sir you look like an 1800 British school boy

[@eaofdeath187]

I love how the test is like "how good was that civil rights guy the CIA killed".

[@dean_l33]

Is that MLK or JFK?

[@swaggerdagger8976]

@@dean_l33 both

[@weskintime4177]

MLK was FBI. As in killed by the FBI.

[@rexdink]

We can get ya in under one of them Genius Visas that they hand out to Models. While Doctors and Physicists have to go through ten years of being a Janitor and going back to school.

[@krtolas]

You cannot bang a doctor or a physicist :)

[@ConnorEduard]

Well he is a model. Send him off on his boogie board.

[@rabidL3M0NS]

Friendly Yankies

[@azazeldeath]

Years ago, infact just over a decade ago, I was engaged to an American. She flew back to the USA as her mother was put in jail and she needed to look after her siblings. We decided that I'd move there as well. I stupidly listened to her advice, she told me the best way to get in was pass a citizenship test, and that she would help me study. Before she left we both took a practice test. I got low marks for my first attempt, mid 60s.....she got high 30s. She spent most of her life minus 2 years in the USA. She ended up cheating on me and leaving me, but years later I asked why if she wanted me to go there we didn't just get married before she left. She genuinely didn't know that would let me go with her to the USA. Kept in touch for awhile until 2 to 3 years ago then randomly blocked basically mid convo never to hear from her again.

[@abefroman4953]

"I will live in Montana. And I will marry a round American woman and raise rabbits, and she will cook them for me. And I will have a pickup truck... maybe even a "recreational vehicle." And drive from state to state." - Jordie

[@assssssssss1000]

I'm American and this was hurtful Jordie.... painfully accurate jokes. You have no idea.

[@adrak]

12:48 "The irish", Jordan know's his American history better than most Americans.

[@aether1284]

Fun fact, we do have a high Court, but its a basketball court at the top of the supreme Court building called "the highest court". Yes I'm serious.

[@__AlexTheGr8__]

"Answer this question about America." "Is the answer America?" "...Actually, yes." for the Simpsons aficionado he is, I'm surprised he missed this golden opportunity

[@kingslead8369]

Us citizen here, I scored closer to 50/100. Impressive work FriendlyJordies.

[@tim.noonan]

You can tell Jordy isn’t American because thinks the people who pick the fruits are citizens 😂

[@The_world_is_not_worthy_of_Him]

the ones doing it right now aren't, but new ones will be soon. Hope they enjoy the trip back home.

[@tim.noonan]

@@The_world_is_not_worthy_of_Him​​⁠Deportations decreased from Obama to Trump. There will be more spectacle (press coverage) about it but with the hyperinflation coming our way, it’s more likely they’ll be bussing people back over the border within the first year of his second term than deporting more than they already do.

[@tim.noonan]

@@The_world_is_not_worthy_of_Him ​​⁠Deportations decreased from Obama to Trump. There will be more spectacle (press coverage) about it but with the hyperinflation coming our way, it’s more likely they’ll be bussing people back over the border within the first year of his second term than deporting more than they already do.

[@CaeruleaTigris]

Tbf, plenty of the people picking our fruit aren't citizens either. We don't hear about it until it's pointed out that the farmers are exploiting them and we only hear about that cause they're usually European.

[@AB0BA_69]

@@The_world_is_not_worthy_of_Himoh no, that sounds like having to pay Americans good wages for field work. How horrible!!

[@HaveanOreshnik]

I am just sitting back and watching the circus unfold with a lit cuban cigar

[@druidicmarksman]

fidel castro be like

[@thebussypresident7085]

@@druidicmarksmanwe should all aspire to be like Castro

[@Sunseyki]

@@druidicmarksman more like fidel castration amirite

[@batofwisdom5692]

It is a good day, not be an American.

[@anthonyking5563]

Can I have one?

[@AM-uo2kf]

If that Simpsons episode about Apu has taught me is Homers line near the end “when are people going to learn, Democracy doesn’t WORK!”

[@PanoptesDreams]

The Secretory of the Interior is who is responsible for the 'environment'. Mericans often think the Sec of Agriculture deals with that, not even close.

[@e.li.0]

18:17 Secretary of environment isn't on there because the EPA is one of a few independent executive agencies. These exist semi-autonomously from the executive departments to minimize politician meddling.

[@markcoroneos7811]

The more you know 😁

[@Kangawallapossumbat]

At 7:30... of the declaration of independence, it was actaully only signed by a few of all of the signatories in 1776... It was not fully signed until 1778 and not adopted until that year.

[@seanbeadles7421]

4:03 idk if it’s right for their test but cotton plantation slavery wouldn’t be profitable and wouldn’t have taken off without the invention of the cotton gin

[@qh5545]

It's technically a reason just not one that anyone at the time was mad about

[@moohooman]

Man, if I took an equivalent test for Australia, I would fail so hard, and I was born here.

[@smalltime0]

"2?! How do they do anything?" Yeah Jordies, that's sort of the problem.

[@ghostlyhousehorrors]

No you don't. Especially with our healthcare. I get that Aussie healthcare got it's own problems but trust me you haven't seen horror until you're hit by a $75,000 helicopter bill uninsured.

[@Milkmans_Son]

FIle Chapter 11 and watch the prequalified credit offers start flowing in. What's the problem.

[@MrPopo-nn7kp]

So if you have insurance no worries. Have to wait 18 months for surgery here even with private health.

[@mrfrenly.wowwww]

But... *GUNS*

[@eyespliced]

Eh, he can probably afford insurance.

[@shoes4clues955]

@@MrPopo-nn7kp the way insurance makes money is by taking advantage of people who can't afford it

[@Robin_Goodfellow]

We had to pass this test to pass my Government class in high school. It was a humbling experience.

[@Nishye501]

3:33 the citizenship test is actually being instated as a requirement for high school graduation, so I’d hope a fair few of us do 7:50 right vs duty

[@b1untf0rce]

i feel so jealous for people who didn’t have to vote in this election and just get to watch it unfold

[@NeonGodzilla87]

Truly the most American part of the test is the immediate offer to"upgrade to remove ads"

[@SimonBauer7]

late stage turbo capitalism at its finest

[@nickeyles552]

He missed one of the best SIMPSON’s references ever when he mentioned Idaho.

[@ReallyRealBenMills]

Local governments act as proxies of the states, and exercise powers delegated to them by the states. SO each state lets local government do different things, and the actual answer as to what states do can change over time as well. There are no firm answers there.

[@DeGuerre]

The correct answer as to who becomes President if both POTUS and VP can't serve is John Goodman. I remember this from The West Wing.

[@cb-wi1cq]

That list of Native tribes is also woefully incomplete too. They literally had so many, super complex interconnected societies with like land management and trade routes and regional festivals like. I cannot overstate just how huge and developed society was on this continent before the smallpox brigade brought me and my ancestors over. Also like many of those tribes still exist. When it comes to land management eastern tribes have developed for thousands of years some of the most logical, common sense methods of doing things. Look into food forests, they're very cool. I want to see a citizenship test to like, the version of countries that would exist here if colonization hadn't happened. That would be so sick lmao. An aboriginal citizenship test would be dope too actually lol.

[@TheRuleOfRose]

I mean your country still has such gems as "Piccaninnie Springs" so I figure you'll fit right in.

[@jonathanbush6197]

That test is so stupid. I was under pressure, just like David Bowie. You did better than I did. I just hope you are happy.

[@marc21256]

18:15 Secretary of the Interior is the Secretary of the Environment (inside the US) and Secretary of State is the Secretary of the Environment (external).

[@ryanroberts1104]

Be careful - remember not to poop too hard, you can injure your back.

[@BonesTheCat]

Benjamin Franklin invented bottled water and that's the hill I'm dying on.

[@bernjobi]

is there an australian civics test? would love to see you do that! many americans fail this test, even though all the answers were covered in my middle and high school government classes

[@CaeruleaTigris]

I just did the practice test. 1/3 of the questions are basic gov. structure and voting related questions we mostly also learned in school, 1/3 are "please brown people, abide by basic Western liberal values", and the other 1/3 are also government structure/"values" related questions that are blatant grey areas and painful to anyone with half a brain, like that the government is secular and doesn't pass religious laws or that we have the freedom to protest peacefully in response to actions of the government.

[@shanewendland3567]

We’d be glad to have a real journalist like you in the states.

[@Hurricayne92]

Now i have to decide if im watching Jordies or Some More News' stream

[@jaycrisp536]

Local council (at least where I’m at) takes care of parks and rec, fire, and there’s also local police departments in addition to state and federal departments, they just handle things based on jurisdiction

[@Meowda-d8f]

How can you advise the Almighty?

[@xtr0city]

As an American i say go for it, it's just as shit as everywhere else that has running water and electricity.

[@Anastas1786]

I think the State Department agent administering your oral exam would be _pleased_ to hear you mention the cotton gin in your answer to the question about the causes of the Civil War... but to officially get the question _right,_ you'd probably have to _elaborate_ on how the cotton gin led to an increase in the supply of clean, saleable cotton which led to an increase of tensions surrounding the slavery and/or economics issue(s), rather than just blurting out "COTTON GIN!". Regarding schooling and education: There _is_ a federal Department of Education, but it mostly exists as a way for the federal government to collect information on how well each state is doing education-wise and distribute federal tax money back to the states whenever Congress devises a new program to increase resources for under-funded schools. Your _state_ Department of Education is the one that actually _sets the curriculum_ and determines _what_ students need to learn and by what point and also actually _establishes_ public schools and universities, in addition to doing many of the same jobs as the federal DoE but at a smaller scale. The state DoE only handles matters that are considered _statewide_ educational concerns, though. Everything else, down to the actual _construction and expansion_ of individual schools, is left to your local _school district,_ which is set up by your county or a big enough city and is often set up as essentially a seperate micro-government of its own, in which case it's often named something like "[City, Town, or Neighborhood Name] _Independent_ School District".

[@fedgoon]

always good to be right side up

[@M077Y]

His thumb is coloured in and he's got ink on the same palm, man's getting into art? OR IS IT WARHAMMER PAINT?!

[@rohancoleman4092]

I know 1776 from watching Nicolas Cage in National Treasure

[@Kilometers_KPH]

Youre Australian, youre basically Florida Man's cousin Youre halfway there

[@inept_]

Julia louis dreyfus being the vp is a great gag

[@napalmholocaust9093]

Benjamin Franklin invented the fractal wing airplane, the most beautiful aircraft ever created. It was so early that the engine was only like 2 horsepower tho and it didn't go anywhere 😔

[@DarthAchilles88]

jordies immediately takes a chance to shit on new mexico lol

[@S.kolenshnikoff]

The reason the Pennsylvania convention (Constitutional convention) was in 1787 was because before that we had the Articles of Confederation, which fell apart eventually and so we had to come up with something better.

[@Kangawallapossumbat]

At 15:00... this question about who is the President if he/she can not serve... Irony... while it goes to the V.P., if the VP can't serve either, then it goes to the Speaker of the House, which is a person the nation did not vote for... Is a mere State elected congressman appointed by the President.

[@ChrisJBT2]

"I Want to be a U.S Citizen" Jordan says, whilst dressed like a Yorkshireman and drinking tea.

[@bodhijohnson874]

Man pulled out Great Depression fit

[@BeansGrubbaAlfredo]

15:22 Australian doesn't know where the Pacific Ocean is

[@Podsedneck]

That's a fabulous Hannity impression Jordan. Honorary American incoming? As an American, the Simpsons taught me everything I know about us, too.

[@notmenotme614]

3:16 “No one is above the law”. Including Donald Trump?

[@RictusHolloweye]

It's a bit strange how Labor in Australia tends to favour the US Democrats and the Liberal Party in Australia favours the US Republicans. In reality the AU Liberal Party is more akin to the US Democrats (right wing. Loves corporations. You'll never get universal healthcare or affordable tertiary education from them). The US Republicans are like the mentally unstable cousin of the Democrats... and there's no actual left wing in the US, not even a mildly left-wing party like the AU Labor Party.

[@willy_b_coyote]

Tell you what, we’d be glad to have you Jordan. Maybe you could actually get our politicians to actually get something done for once.

[@gg_sam7847]

Woah OVER 20 minutes? That's groundbreaking stuff

[@unyu-cyberstorm64]

you will never guess who won

[@davidmonaghan1896]

A sober? Australian dressed up as Andy Capp a drunken Brit having a larf at America, classic Jordies.

[@Tbot_2]

6:56 as an American. I think a lot of foreigners think US states are like provinces in other countries. But the US essentially functions as 50 separate countries with their own governments and laws and everything else with a blanket set of laws draped on top of it.

[@prestobizmal]

Idaho sucks, but it's also amazing and beautiful

[@Meowda-d8f]

Not my opinion, but who am I to ask that is?

[@sirnato5218]

I’m pretty sure Idaho just voted blue right? What’s your opinion now :)

[@skylx0812]

During the Cold War the main concern for 🇺🇸 was Sean Connery or that other guy as James Bond.

[@syzygy6629]

14:21 Can't brag about something you didn't win

[@WagudCode]

9:40 We outdo the Irish in Potato farming. Idaho alone supplies 80% of the potatoes to McDonald's which as you know is an American Holy Site. We also have a lot of random tinkers and inventors, like a farm boy causally invented a different means to colored TV. We just be farming and building machines. We are also a one party state and may possible still have a Klan presence in the far north on the border with Canada :(.

[@BlergyG]

Yeah! Move to Idaho, it sucks in it's own special way but there's a lot of pretty land about.

[@TheStuntedMinion]

I am a US citizen, born and raised. I hear from time to time that a majority of US citizens myself included would not pass the citizenship test. so that is a thing. 😅

[@HonkyKong258]

If you do, please do us a favor and settle in a state like Wyoming or either of the Dakotas. They're deep red with a population of like 5 people, you'll swing the vote just by showing up. Plus you'll have an absolute field day reporting on their assets and trust laws, which are completely insane.

[@bernjobi]

just voted blue in nd ;)

[@itookallthenames]

And there’s bison

[@joeb6986]

312

[@vickyvic171]

As an Idahoian, if you live in the mountains its pretty good. If you live in the city good luck as a foreiner lol.

[@Hops-gy8eb]

16:17 I don’t wanna hear it from the guy who got prosecuted for political journalism

[@BonelessMoose]

what about now, PLS SAVE ME FRIENDLYJORDIES

[@bartman64]

What’s the difference between the High Court and the Supreme Court? Tomatoes and sour cream?

[@kabongpope]

The Supreme Court is like a regular court but with sour cream and diced tomatos

[@Second_UNIT]

Im currently trying to land a career that will let me visit my partner in Australia so I can LEAVE. you DONT want to be here

[@bodhijohnson874]

Maybe you and Jorden can swap places

[@ParoXyzmm]

Just FYI in case you didn't know, there are specific types of visa you can get if you have a partner in Australia. And I *think* it's possible to get permanent residency if you marry/plan on marrying them and go through some other hoops (alternatively you can just get a permanent visa, but that's nowhere near as good as permanent residency). Other hoops probably including getting education/work though. But unlike straight work visas, the bar for the education/work is a lot lower, I know someone who is trying to get a straight work related visa/residency and apparently they have to have like a masters level education, but someone else I know who is marrying an Australian national is working as a primary school teacher and they seem to be doing fine. But do your own looking, since my knowledge on this isn't very good immi.homeaffairs.gov.au/what-we-do/family-migration-program/visa-options/about-partner-visas

[@Happycoreftw]

I live in New Mexico and it's basically like all those crap places you guys talk about in Australia but with guns! Best Mexican food in the states though and weed too 👌

[@startofmadness]

This is cool and all but when's the next Warhammer video?

[@jeffmunkynutz1568]

Your audio guy/chick (👈eh) is kickin goals pretty much every vid, the slowed down van halen, im still giggling about, oh god, someone wants to use the computer....... Deyear jammoes, Er em dasepoyntyad beeonde erticulaychun thet uhev dacyded tweu mak ur mekerie ef majerika an ur vadeo. Eii mey er MEY NET BER a catuzan ef thet plenat end rajackt cetogarakle tha anduleing aseartchun yar fragwhiselleng thet gamarikans er nit smort bcaz ei dadent no canedar wez en eylend en thay ell dad su theh jonkz an uyoo!! Jammez u dak, urae eh potsee webah jawhemmah teepotbageh end eh drenglberreh.

[@Meowda-d8f]

Never threaten the Emperor

[@Rockman_Halo]

I hope my couch is hot enough for JD Vance to spare me

[@moistcologne]

By the way 16 year olds need to get 100% on this to graduate

[@codenamepyro2350]

definitely not everywhere in the US, varies by state

[@BakrEvon]

Definitely not true

[@hollandp9606]

They must forget pretty quickly afterwards.

[@terrablaze3387]

Lies

[@Lulueh]

The reason the Constitution is much later is that it wasn't our first "constitution" after we freed ourselves from Britain, we also had the Articles of Confederation which came before it.

[@Luney_0296]

The US is one of the countries I'd never move to. It's such a shitshow

[@SimonBauer7]

agreed, going east is crap with russia and going west is terrible because murica. either way its terrible.

[@longiusaescius2537]

Anglo cope

[@Luney_0296]

@@longiusaescius2537 anglo cope? I have 0% anglo in me lmao

[@longiusaescius2537]

@@Luney_0296 kangaroo or europoor (Anglo)

[@Luney_0296]

@@longiusaescius2537 "europoor" lmao, tell that to the lower amounts of homeless and poor we have bud

[@aaaxel]

Bulgaria mentioned!!!

[@84westy55]

You'd be welcome, but disappointed.

[@MolGaeilge]

17:02 I was about to call BS on Inuits but then I remembered USA owns Alaska

[@wowzerz5734]

First time ever getting summoned to jury duty i couldnt sleep from anxiety. So my buddy said hey ill bring you some acid it will keep you busy through the night and wear off for jury duty. It was my first time ever doing acid so my buddy said he would stay up with me on PlayStation voice chat. He got off shortly after and did not stay up with me. To make the beginning of the story short i spent all night in and out of the shower tripping balls. AAAAAAND it did not wear off by the time i went to jury duty i was at peek. but there was 40 some people whats the chance i get called....My name was the first called. So here i am sitting as close to the judge and bailiff that you can tripping balls. Then it was revealed that it was for a weed crime and as i have a conviction from having weed on me i got excused from the panel. So i walked around the city after till my legs was sore lols what a wonder first time on acid.

[@andginisin]

This is so funny

[@wowzerz5734]

@@andginisin it was a hell of a time and possibly the worst time to try acid for the first time.

[@jeade-en]

at 5.30 in nicole flint ad popped up, superb

[@smithy2692]

Idaho is the home of the potato and located in the middle of nowhere. Spot on 👌