addressing the question about my "step" son

Finally answering your guys' top asked question. Will Tommy be living with us? Thank you to @Dyson for Sponsoring today’s video. Check out the link to get your own Dyson Outsize/Dyson Omni-glide! www.inflcr.co/S... #Dyson #DysonCleaning #DysonOmniglide #DysonOutsize #backtoschool
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Confused? LONG STORY SHORT:
My name is Jess! I had a daughter (Lilia) at age 18 w/ my high school sweetheart. We mutually split up & co-parent to this day. I met someone new, got married, had twin boys (Kyson & Kaden) and another son (Landen). He cheated, we split ways, & he’s not around much. After juggling life as a single mom of 4 for some time, I met Chris, he had 2 sons: Caden and Tommy, who eventually became my step sons. After Chris and I got married, we had our 7th child together, Addelyn. We’re one big, complicated, blended family & every second of our story is on KZbin, you can start from the beginning here: • 8 Weeks Pregnant!
FAQ: Yes, we’re done having kids.
FAQ: Names and ages of the kids: Caden (step son, born in 2009), Lilia (daughter, born in 2010), Tommy (step son, born in 2010), Kyson (son, born in 2012), Kaden (son, born in 2012), Landen (son, born in 2014), Addelyn (daughter, born in 2016)
FAQ: Who are the dads? Gabe (Lilia’s dad), Drake (Kyson, Kaden, and Landen bio dad), Chris (Caden, Tommy, Addelyn’s dad)
#blendedfamily#lifestyle

[@mayam5353]

Sometimes as a boy gets older he wants more dad time and learn things from his dad more and he is getting older and wants to experience school year time with you and hopefully maybe later in the school year or next school year he can try it out. My heart goes out to his mom because I'm sure it's hard changing things and I know she loves her babies so much

[@leighahoisington1415]

i’m sure he also wants to be with the twins more too

[@DANNYTHEFROG123]

It's great when kids can say who they want to spend more time with it and the adults make it happen for them. It's not personal. Normal for boys to want to spend teen years more with dad. Because they identify with same sex parent more.

[@archiesleaven3233]

Coming from 15 year old boy that’s facts 👍

[@thatblvckhippie1911]

It's not just about gender either. I moved in with my dad whenever I asked just because I wanted to be around him and have a change of scenery. 🤎

[@dominiquexo4772]

So true.. my son wants to live with his dad full time but his wife is disrespectful and I refuse to let my son live with him. Am I wrong?

[@ilTHfeaa]

Jess you're posting EVERY DAY and I LOVE IT 😭 just remember to take care of yourself and don't work too hard!!

[@swaggylee7825]

Yepp she gets more time to edit bc the kids are in school now

[@ilTHfeaa]

@@swaggylee7825 i know i just wanna make sure she takes time for herself too

[@ilTHfeaa]

@Mental health it's bc the kids are back in school, i just wanna make sure she takes care of herself :)

[@XXMAC78]

She is able to edit now! 😝

[@tracianderson9823]

@@XXMAC78 plus she has a better PC built to edit vlogs. Lots of things are coming together st the same time. ❤❤❤

[@wowzatrishiebunz]

My son asked to move in with his dad at age 12 and I agreed he could. It’s hard to make everyone happy when the parents have differing opinions. Very mature on your views about the situation. I love Chris, love him! Jessica, you are so lucky.

[@adoseofj]

Can I just say you validating your son's feelings and allowing him to make such a big choice for himself is amazing! I know it had to be hard to let him go but you're doing awesome Mama! 💙

[@mmeadows1014]

Girl your coparenting is insane. You’re so accommodating to everyone’s needs/wants! And I just also have to say Addie is frieking GORGEOUS. All of your babies are 🙂

[@maddieschermer8557]

I understand how Tommy’s mom may be feeling. However as a child of divorcees I wish things were more up to the child. By the mom allowing Tommy to continue building his strong bond with his dad, she’s in turn earning so so much respect from Tommy for listening to his wishes. I just hope the best comes from the situation for his sake ❤️

[@caroleenherman2469]

3e31qq1

[@roelipomm4106]

as a child of split parents it's definitely important to live primarily with the parent you decide... i think by 5th grade they should be making their own decisions at least.

[@amymarienaglowsky4464]

I agree

[@enadalton2511]

Same. I had to wait into I was 18. To be able live with my dad.

[@zoesvlogs1575]

Ena Dalton why did you have to wait until then?? was it because of the courts?? i’m asking because i’m in the same boat right now, and my son wants to live with me and he’s five. I have 80% of the time regardless, but his Mom likes to have that control. at what age can he decide where he wants to live full time?? do you know?

[@Victfriesen]

This girrrrlll is on fiiirreeee 🔥🔥🔥 just me barely scraping by with my 3 kids…. and Jess with 7 kids , several pets, and vlogging and editing non stop! You go girl !

[@AmberKober]

I’m not gonna shit on anyone else for being able to do more than I can 😂 If you are a morning person who can pull yourself together and form sentences and happily get your kids to school then more power to you, I’ll see you at night when I’m thriving.

[@JesssFam]

Retweeeet 😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@JeonLife93]

Preach it sister. 👏👏👏🤣🤣 I call school mornings "mombie mode" like a zombie but mumma version 🤣

[@BarilFamily2024]

Ugh yes girl yes !!!

[@Ambernie85]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@indydouma1385]

Yesss, I don't think she was shitting on them though, more like sharing a little pet peeve about people holding up the drop off line:)

[@1990vm]

I honestly just love and admire how Chris listens to his kids and doesn’t she brush off their feelings. Another dad would ignore that wish especially cause of the court order and explain to them that’s not possible but the fact that he will take things further aka fight for what his son truly wants is just amazing. I can understand bio mom but he’s older and she shouldn’t take it to heart. As boys get older they might just wanna spend more time with dad and that’s okay . I hope she gives the green light and in all honesty if he doesn’t like it and or change his mind , he can always go back to how it was.

[@opalseabourn4270]

As a mom I saw this from my point of view. I would die without my kids, that has to be really hard for her. Tommy is still young to. Wish yall all lived close so he could have all of yall morw often.

[@clairevaleski6598]

I work in a school and some of my kids thrive more when they are with different parents, some kids are connected deeper to their mom over dad and vice versa, hopefully Tommy can express those thoughts and feelings, and eventually be where he feels like he can thrive more. ❤️

[@kaytlynmccarter8552]

I wanted to live with my dad after living with my mom primarily for years. I totally understand what Tommy is feeling. In Oklahoma the age of choice is 14, but it may be different in California. The judge will listen to what the kid wants after they are 10, so Tommy should be able to express his want in the court to help your case. My mom is a great mom too, but I am a huge daddy’s girl. Sometimes it all just comes down to what the child wants, and neither parent should keep them from that!

[@taylorbayless7633]

So true. I am from Oklahoma and I have so many friends that their parents do the opposite all they do is argue and try and keep their kids from the other parent

[@Quila1125]

i wish my friends kids could choose who they wanna be with. their only 8, 9 and 10. they wanna live with their mom but their dad has custody. they live with grandma too. its sad cause they wanna live with their mom so bad shes remarried good job house. i just dont get the courts. in ohio their usually for the mom. unfortunaly their dad rather hurt the mom but in return it hurts kids. if only he would put kids wants and needs first.

[@kathikamholz2100]

Exactly. Tommy'll be 11 the end of Dec, so he should be listened to by the judge

[@nieceyllera8594]

You’re totally right! This is the case with my daughter she’s such a daddy’s girl and wants to live with him. (4 hours away from me) and although the decision is tearing me up I also have to do what’s best for her and what she wants.

[@saraH-yu1mx]

No they won’t. A child has to be 14 in CA and there are so many factors involved.

[@McCreaFamilyHomestead]

Grammy sent Dyson to sponsor you ❤️.. our bearded dragon LOVES those nasty roaches lol. We tried to raise them but our cats said nope and had fun with them. We do 1 dozen extra large crickets with calcium on them twice a week. They definitely need the protein weekly. Other days he gets cut up bell peppers peeled and diced apples or greens.

[@Lexaloodle]

The communication between your blended families is beautiful. I commend you for being so open and loving. Tommy has a good head on his shoulders and I know he will end up where he will be best. (And no offense to the mom. She seems amazing. I'm sure as a child you have to wonder what it would be like with the other parent and that's OK!)

[@Graceroadto3k]

Have they talked about tommy and cadens mum recently

[@tracianderson9823]

@@Graceroadto3k They are very respectful and give her privacy. They talk around the situation if that make sense and try to be a respectful as possible.

[@MoriieJaseyda]

You can tell Chris really want his son with him🥺 praying it work out

[@idk9450]

As a child of divorced parents, I am pretty sure the age for when a child gets to decide which parent they are going to live with is 12. Love you all Jesssfam and hope this helps! ❤️

[@mad.m_805]

Are they still allowed to do split custody if the child wants it

[@Charis6540]

It’s different in every state but ca is 14 and they still don’t get to make the decision 100% but at 14 the judge will let a child tell them where they would like to live

[@gabbymartino7703]

Not true in my case. i couldn’t choose to not see one parent until i was 18

[@nieceyllera8594]

They don’t necessarily get to “decide” but the judge will take their choice into consideration

[@JaydenRaelee]

This is true for some states! I’m in WA & the age there is 12! So when I turned 12, despite what the court order said, what I wanted went.

[@cruzinbosco]

I'm with Chris on the shoes. Those are prison sandals, just in different colors. lol

[@Ke11yJean]

I was watching some older vlogs when I got the notification for this one. Perfect timing!!

[@roxanneconradson]

Jessss what’s up fam!! How’s everyone today? You are all amazing ❤️💚

[@tschandraheinze1680]

There is a 100% spasific age and i do know the age is different in California then Alaska. I agree with yoh guys what will be will be and it will all work out how it should. As a parent it is far from easy but the best thing to always know is you will be his Dad always or Mom always 💙 hugs from Alaska Tschandra 🤗 ♥

[@emilyelisabeth7131]

Omg I’m so early if you see this you always make me smile and make my day better, I’ve been feeling horrible recently but your videos make me feel better so thank you so much! 💕💕💕

[@LorraineVirginie]

Jess is the absolute best youtuber ive ever seen when it comes to making her product placements look natural and appealing. Omg I want this vacuum after this lol.

[@JesssFam]

This comment means so much to me you have no idea 🥺 I try soooo hard to make even my sponsored videos fun to watch! Thank you for your comment 💛

[@josiecooper7827]

@@JesssFam After watching your video from a few days ago I bought one of the Thred Up goodie boxes! You definitely sold it for me🙃

[@LorraineVirginie]

@@JesssFam I can tell you take the time to really choose products you support too which makes it even better! Also, yay for comments being open!!!!

[@melissacameron5986]

So much respect for your handling of this situation ☺️ very healthy

[@popicalbubbles]

These vlogs are everything but please don't stress yourself out too much with it :)

[@baileyelaine]

i feel like Jess is one of the rare youtubers that actually gives honest reviews and doesn’t lie when doing sponsorships

[@JeonLife93]

Definitely! She's mentioned multiple times she will not take a sponsorship if she herself wouldn't use it, doesn't agree with it etc. I find a lot of KZbinrs will just take whatever and not actually use it themselves nor even know much about it x

[@izabellawhaid5562]

I love it how whenever anyone else sponsors something I would skip it but with her I just watch it I just love it🥰

[@janejs3320]

Me too!🥰😍

[@madelynnfender]

This is an amazing thing to talk about. My stepson said he wants to live with his dad but since he lives in another state with his mom they decided to wait till he graduates high school (he is a freshman now) and then move in with us for college

[@aubrayolson383]

The remark from chris saying “you never want to let your kids walk out the door” and Jess is in the back smirking has me dying😂😭

[@Kaur-anmol97]

Ehmmm Drake lol

[@Lily92691]

“lizard-dog” - JesssFam, 2021 😂

[@myreality5959]

That's very fair. Like Chris is doing a good thing. He could be hard and say nope he's coming now. But he's working with baby mama to make it work as best as possible

[@ArmyWife8697]

I love Lillia's outfit. My daughter has been wanting cargo pants like those but she isn't comfortable enough to actually wear them.

[@Rosewolf29]

Since Kaden is so good at riddles, I know a couple he might like. Their from Redwall by Brian Jacques, an awesome book series. Lilia might like the songs and Kaden would like the riddles.

[@ajmtapia319]

All of my kids are in school now too. Its such a weird feeling. So exciting but so sad at the same time.

[@vjannelle723]

Man Lilia looks so grown now. I remember sweet tiny baby Lilia

[@teenlove02]

I think we took an update on the intro, the guys are growing up really fast 🥺. Llilia and big Caden are nowhere near being teenagers, crazy 🤯

[@kaylawilliams588]

In January she’s going to.

[@abby6610]

She’s 11 and thirTEEN

[@Julia-gz1jj]

@@abby6610 what cadens not 13

[@Travelwithkade27]

@@abby6610 they are both 11 caden is 12 in October

[@jackson10RIP]

I noticed Addy hasn't been as into her lipstick lately. She's growing up 😭

[@sarahmavignierr]

I swear to god this channel is my one infalible dose of serotonin for the past like 10 years. Through thick and thin. (Totally forgot to say that before 'cause the comments were disabled for so long)

[@annshepardmurray5652]

Jess there is this super cute Mickey ghost hanging decoration at lows or Home Depot idk for sure and i think you would love it

[@meganlopez560]

I hope Tommy’s mom does the right thing and let him come live with you guys like he’s wants to. He’s lived with her since the beginning. It’s time for him to be with his dad. Chris should have just as much rights as the mom. I hope it all works out the way Tommy wants it to!

[@jennperez689]

I understand where she’s coming from also like he said you wouldn’t want your kid to leave but at the same time if he wants to then

[@saraH-yu1mx]

🙄

[@PritchLife]

I was just about to go to bed …. Sleep is overrated, right?? 😂😂

[@amandagomez923]

Bearded dragons are the best pets for kids. I have one and he's so personable. It's also a great way to teach lessons to kids.

[@emely.M1]

Okay My daughter has been begging for one and I know close to nothing about them Can you please share more info? What kind of lamps they need? What do they eat? Special Care? Any info that can help! I want to do this right🖤

[@DenaMarie90]

@@emely.M1 there’s TONS of research out there. You’ll be lost for weeks reading all of it lol but from what I’ve heard from friends, they’re relatively easy pets and such a joy to be around.

[@crystalretzena5360]

I love how the girls have two different personalities Lillia hates makeup and getting her hair done and addie ask for makeup and her hair done addie maybe a daddy's girl but she differently alot like her momma

[@aziebababy]

Talking from a psychological perspective... it will be amazing that Tommy's voice could be heard. If he feels that's what he wants go for it. Just listen. For his mental and emotional health.. If parents don't do it now, in the future.. they won't tell anything else to you.

[@7BearSarah]

I have a massive fear of roaches. I love you but I had to skip that part, dude! Just looking at them makes me feel like they're crawling on me

[@thevlogsoflife2998]

i clicked faster then chris can say whats up fam love you

[@robynstrangward4364]

I’d like to thank you from the 12 year old me. Letting your kid to have this choice. Letting them be kids. I never got that & it’s so amazing watching this pure love.

[@leahc2474]

Wow Chris is wearing a red shirt not black. Good things come to those who wait

[@Itsjollyholly]

Finally early and not a day late 😂 loving all this content. Please take time for yourself and have fun!! Love y’all!

[@christinae.8019]

Have a great day everyone 🥰🥰 remember you are beautiful, you are worthy, and there is always someone to listen 🥰🥰( I'm here if you need me 🥰)

[@Jaymie199]

Hey Jess! Long long long term watcher since the twins! No hate at all but can i ask - your very concious about saying they all your children but how come in the titles its always *step* son ❤️❤️ All my love x

[@jenibrynard6856]

I’m guessing because it helps differentiate between her bio kids and Chris’ bio kids. I’ve been a step mom for 10 years, and I refer to them as my step child even though they live with my husband and I 100% of the time. I don’t think there is anything wrong with referring to them as my step child, and I don’t have an issue with them calling me their step mom. That’s who I am. “Step” has historically had a negative connotation, but it doesn’t have to. Also, I think it’s the right thing to do out of respect for the boys mom which is also the right thing to do.

[@Jaymie199]

@@jenibrynard6856 Yeah totally up to her and that makes total sense! It was genuinely just a question i had wondering because in many videos she mentions she doesn’t like using the phrase step children shes used phrases like bonus two etc. I have no problem with it at all i call my step mum my step mum and its always worked for us! But i suppose i was just wondering x

[@cat021886]

She addressed it sometime last year about how she doesn’t like to call them her “step” kids but for the sake of the video and also titles she uses it in those ways. She says it helps the new we followers to understand what’s going on. I’m a OG been following since Lilia was a baby. My daughter is only 5 months younger than Lilia. I could see how a new person would get confused with so many people and similar names

[@goldenwidow8937]

I understand, my parents are divorced and my brother wants to live with my mom whereas, I live with my dad.

[@shoenan2294]

I wonder if Jess knows she will only have 6 months when all the kids are teens, Addie will turn 13 about 6 months before Lilia turns 20!!!

[@Chloe.Miller21]

I'm sure she does, I mean, she birthed most of them lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣 my parents had teenagers in the house for 2 years before I turned 20 back in July

[@shoenan2294]

@@Chloe.Miller21 Yeah it was more of a rhetorical question, like I'm sure she technically knows but whether the realisation has actually set in 😂

[@racheltaylor9161]

We have the same situation. The child wants to move and live with us, but the mother is stopping it. Very difficult situation for everyone.

[@nicolecrotty5078]

In Australia children aged 12 can say whom they wish to live with providing its a safe environment

[@raghadnjjar7714]

Jess posting everyday 🤝 helping so many people in so many different ways

[@beckbeck5110]

For real 💛💛💛

[@Kibblezxx]

32 seconds! Love you guys smm!! And I say this in every vid, my fav food places are Starbucks and McDonald's, my style is retro/skater girl (or I want it to be lol) I'm a the same age as lilia, a lil bit older. And one day I want to meet lilia, your kids, and you🤍 and I was the 10th comment, but it took me 4 mins to type this.

[@cindrellakshetre]

I love how Jess has such a pure heart about her kids like she is the mom who can punish kids when they get in trouble but not the mom who makes the kids hate her does anyone get it like I wish I can be a mother like a her atleast a little bit

[@janejs3320]

Well said!!❣

[@joeyp7431]

You have to be careful of what the kids see too. It's not fair for them to see one parent slagging off the other is it. Its far better to be amicable even if you hate each other ❤

[@tanishapillai8063]

Second, jessfam notification is enough for me to drop everything and jump on KZbin. ❤️❤️ Never been this loyal/ committed to anything in my life.

[@awinterberger23]

Hey Jess Fam!! love you all and i love your vlogs

[@hediavery9962]

We had our bearded dragon for 12 almost 13 years. He ate everything. I occasionally gave him a pinky or mouse. They don’t have to eat mice cause too many can make them fat lol.

[@elsarios7565]

I love how you treat your stepson like you our kid

[@elsarios7565]

Our

[@familybengtson]

Lilia has some strong teen vibes. How did that happen

[@isabelsissel4428]

I work in family law & in some states the courts take the kids consideration starting at age 10, really depends on the judge though. Completely understand the situation you guys are in and I’m hopeful everything works out for you all❤️😊

[@anitavandermerwe7797]

The kids have grown up so much in a week since school started!!!

[@maanyasreegiriraju8598]

Didn't that robot vacuum sponsor one of your videos a few weeks ago? Do you actually use the things that sponsor you?

[@sandrajohnson4233]

The age is 14. The courts have to allow the child to address the court and express their choice. In the end it is one factor... ultimately judge makes decision. Younger children can still address the court if it is deemed appropriate and consistent with best interest of the child.

[@littlered8844]

They make mats to put in front of the litter box that's clean the litter off their feet. They makes are like 10-20 bucks at target it made a huge difference for us

[@HaileyCindy]

Girl, I don't keep up with cleaning with 2 kids 🤣

[@randompersonontheinternet5855]

Hiiiiiii I love your vids so much I hope you and the kids have a great day

[@lizplayz4957]

My family had a bearded dragon for the summer! And we had to feed it crickets it was gross and disgusting, definitely recommend Beatles!

[@otakuxhunter2753]

i have never clicked so fast off of my hero academia videos until i saw this pop up-

[@not_aubzz7279]

Does everyone have a wireless vacuum lol we have one with a cord and it works just fine lol

[@fionainnes-smith2706]

Me too….but it IS a Dyson😂

[@Melissa-jw2xx]

Starting a dubia colony was life changing for us. Super easy to start too.

[@zoedem7743]

I'm totally with about the crickets!!... they are the best pets ever, love my girl.

[@carlijamison1078]

If you refrigerate the crickets for about 10 minutes before you feed them they pretty much temporarily pass out making it easier to feed them!

[@hannamcclure5052]

This is the earliest I’ve been to watch a JessFam video! ❤️ makes me happy haha

[@user-lt7so1fj2r]

WHEN ARE YOU GUYS DOING A HOUSE TOUR?!?!

[@kaytiemyers2698]

This is tough for me. I think sometimes one parent is perceived as the fun parent which is easy to do if you're also the well off parents with a bunch of fun siblings and toys and entertainment. It doesn't mean your mother deserves less time with you just because her situation isn't the same. She may already feel in adequate as it is..my dad fought tooth and nail and we had 50/50 and it wasn't great for us around 14 we all chose who we lived with so as a kid I get it. As a parent the idea makes me sad

[@christianmorgan7366]

I suggest Tommy can spend more lifetime with his dad and move in With the five kids

[@leahhewitt8805]

What ever happened to the robot vaccuum/mop? Do you still use that one as well? Genuine question.

[@emmal5672]

I thought about that too

[@lillyabell3808]

I am a child in a co parenting relationship with a step mom, There is an age and in my state I get a lot of say, not final, at 16 Also jess You are probably the best step/ bio mom ever

[@KaliaNicole1996]

Okay I thought Addie was a daddy’s girl until I seen the end where you guys were cuddling ☺️☺️ so sweet

[@shannonjohnson4314]

I would be heartbroken if my son wanted to leave me however I would let it be. Co-parenting is tuff at times but at least you're doing it. I was a mommas girl and never wanted to live with my Dad because he was never around.

[@scottishpride6473]

My step son did this for the summer 2 yrs ago and he never went back LOL ....It's all about the kids💞

[@momsternash]

Our elementary school has the worstttt pickup line ever! They have cars going everywhere and people are always hitting other people’s cars at least once a day! And they have 3 pickup areas but only allow us to use one! It drives me insane lol so I park and walk.

[@lileighwindle4150]

Love This video. Loved watching it can’t wait to watch the next video ❤️

[@noyasis]

10:28 like mother like bearded-dragon-son 😂

[@gracemiller27]

These videos always brighten up my day! ILY Jess ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@jennifercihacek5008]

First

[@briannaslife7470]

“She does still like me” Jess 2021😂

[@funnelcakescafe9674]

Hi Jessica these blogs are so amazing!

[@BriannaAshley]

As Landon and addie get older how will you handle their room situation

[@BriannaAshley]

@Mental health yesss I’m definitely interested to see how it’ll work out. Them talking about tommy moving in full time had me wondering where everyone would go in the future…

[@Tarebear120]

I feel like I would be scared to drop those roaches in my house in fear that one would get away and then you have an infestation of roaches 🤢😂

[@christinec2718]

I’m Wisconsin, the ashes is 12, when your kids get to choose who to live with

[@brooklyn147]

Never goes wrong with some Jess in our lives

[@xplrbuddiess]

Addie is looking more and more like Jess everyday 🥺🥺

[@lorr6236]

Jesss I love you can you please get us a video of your hairstyles as school/college starts. 🥰💖

[@jessicastrickland950]

We started a Dubia colony when we had a bearded dragon and it made life so much easier. Crickets are the worst.

[@jaydnney8418]

That smile when you picked up your kids❤️❤️ Awe! You guys clearly love your kids so dearly!!! Heart warming😊😊😊

[@Charis6540]

In CA at 14 the child can tell the judge where they want to live but it’s still up to the judge until they are 18