John Bradshaw - Healing The Shame That Binds You (Part 1)

This lecture is based on John Bradshaw's book with the same title..but in this lecture he only covers the first part of the book (the problem)..the second part of the book deals with (the solution) and the healing process..
You can find the book on Amazon.com:
www.amazon.com/Healing-Shame-B...

[@kevphillips02]

It is one thing understanding this on an intellectual level but to emotionally heal the shame that binds is horendous yet the most rewarding thing i have ever had the courage to embark on. The journey continues

[@dianeibsen5994]

Yes, exactly. Decades of trying to heal! What have you found this helped you the most healing the shame? How long have you been working on it?

[@mrs8792]

This gentleman helped me survive and heal from childhood family origin toxicity.

[@barryfix]

The best explanation of why people act why they do. He was and still is the best. Thank You John Bradshaw.

[@daisycypresstulipgarden2131]

Same applies to puppies. When puppies are beaten they don't trust anybody later on. We must be patient and kindhearted caregivers to our puppies and children.

[@IdesofMarc]

Dealing with my shame based issues, expressing the locked up, repressed feelings of rage and grief never able to be expressed at the time of deep level trauma and repeated violations --is why I am alive today. Healthy, free, happily sober and even grateful. Not wanting to be anyone else but me. It's due to the recovery first starting with 12 steps.. and then rocketed into that 4th dimension BECAUSE OF JOHN BRADSHAW and others who paved the way. In deepest gratitude for my life.

[@elaisagrace5232]

"... There was a Time, oh tender Elf, that you were poetry itself." 💖 Christopher Marley 🙏🏽

[@garytbradbury4799]

I've been a long time student of John Bradshaw's. It took me a great part of my life to finally get rid of 'my shame". Any one not familiar with his guidance and seminars do give it a chance and listen quietly. As you do you'll over time re-learn myths and sink holes that you may of fallen into. Now I have a new lease on life, and this is no little deal, because I was about to just give up and end my life. I'd like to thank John for being such a giving spirit, for sharing your wisdom and knowledge. You, John are a blessing and a good soul! God must of created you and graced you with His wisdom and empathy only an angel could encompass. In short I just want to send my thanks...my prayers and love are with you. PS: We are all on a journey, we'll meet at the end. Gary

[@dontrespond1916]

Garyt Bradbury been there too

[@synon9m]

meh sounds nice but I don't buy it. there is no magic bullet where you're magically cured from all shame.

[@lucys2885]

Fab! I wish you well on your journey.

[@lifeonlifesterms6827]

This Book saved /changed my life. It was recommended to me by a nurse in the hospital where I had admitted myself for trying to drink myself to death (again). If you've been to any 12 step meetings, you've probably heard someone say "I believe I was an addict before I ever put that first drink/drug in me". This book walks you through exactly why this is the case and how to move on and heal. Take comfort in the fact that you had little chance, now move forward.

[@momandpopbusinessfunding]

Saved my life in the late 80's.

[@KennyisDeadNOT1]

Which book is this??

[@tootseug]

@@KennyisDeadNOT1 Healing the Shame That Binds You

[@paulafolsom3879]

What is the name of the book please?

[@dRBAR]

4:50 "whatever the addiction is, it's going to be rooted in toxic shame..." SO POWERFUL.

[@Emptiness512]

This guy is off the charts amazing, thank you Bradshaw for being such a light to this world

[@shahinea2998]

A true legend. Lots of respect for him

[@coldnprickly]

I used to use Bradshaw's videos while doing group therapy sessions at a mental hospital I used to work for. The patients didn't always buy into his ideas but it got them talking about these kind of issues.

[@TheMoonrise007]

I just stumbled across this video while battling codependency, and nothing has helped me as much as this has. I am so grateful to have found this tonight. He was such a wonderful person and absolutely brilliant. God bless him ❤

[@tulinbeyduz920]

rachel widd I understand about codependency. I liked what he said about codependency, it's searching for happiness outside of ourself instead of within . Taken me many many years , trials and tribulations

[@Misslotusification]

I wish I'd heard that decades ago... I guess when the student is ready, the teacher appears I was clinging too strong on my zone of comfort to ease the pain.

[@sebnemkalkan3312]

"We lost that spontaneity"... Almost every month I watch this video at least -one time-, it keeps me awake...

[@AL_THOMAS_777]

👏 🙏 🤝 👍

[@sebnemkalkan3312]

@@AL_THOMAS_777 thnks

[@Bieszczady73]

Mr.Bradshaw.In the name of many thousands people you helped with your understanding and for the ability to pass this knowledge on us-my biggest,most sincere :THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Jerzy Ulicki-Rek

[@youngpatrick29]

ahh i remember when bradshaws first book came out in 1952, i saw it, decided to get it, and ive been a fan of bradshaw ever since.

[@BeingMe23]

Master Young When ya got me beat. I found him on PBS about 1985.

[@AiHiringSolutions]

My favorite therapist EVER. I miss him dearly... I'm sorry I didn't meet him.

[@BeingMe23]

I am no expert. But I have had great success if you speak to a child on their level. I don't mean a high pitch baby talk. Just respect them and give them simple straight forward answers to questions.

[@barryfix]

He changed my life also Ever grateful He suffered much in his past He helped millions Will never forget his contribution to us all

[@060in3seconds]

I’m not a parent I was a nanny I just wanted to say that John Bradshaws honesty is brilliant

[@AprilWatters]

It's the way people are 'Raised" and treated as children

[@janicebeckett4824]

April Watters It the mental structure of a society that invest more in getting than being. We don't have time to feel, to experience anything that doesn't produce gain, or power, or triumph.

[@projectvivalavida4164]

Wow, Janice, what a great quote! You nailed it.

[@moshiacsun6573]

Its how we reacted to how we were treated growing up.

[@occultpriestess]

The World needs this now more than ever. Send Copies to your friends, family & neighbors!

[@Misslotusification]

5:35 and 6:50 have been my child issues. No trust in the world as I was witnessing it, as well as no ability to say no, hence no healthy boundaries. No wonder addiction(s) was the relief for unmet needs.

[@MN-it3tv]

I wish I could understand the relation between addiction and unmet needs.

[@aniqaambani8426]

I'm not strong enough to watch this stuff omg. Brings me back to my childhood.

[@IbarraAlejandro]

Same dear 😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@glendavalente4187]

I am just now learning of John Bradshaw's death in May and am greatly saddened. I have spent sooo many hours listening to him and watching his lectures not to mention teaching parenting classes based entirely on his lectures. Thanks so much John Bradshaw.

[@edunlap6594]

Just learned of him this morning from the familytreecounseling channel here on KZbin.

[@dance4u850]

Bradshaw was an Icon. Incredible series on the family and many others, still topical today.

[@ysooyaalka6172]

Glenda Valente

[@paolaniembro6847]

Glenda Valente right now I have 2 mothers groups based on his books. They are trying to leal their shame. In certain way, he will always be alive.

[@clanmaccus1959]

Brene Brown is saying these things in 2018

[@mysteryjesus]

This is great. My mother has always been the least trustworthy person I have ever known. I was an unwanted child which meant I was a stake put into the heart of her plans to get back with the love of her life. Instead she was saddled down with a child and a husband, all the while wishing the entire time that she could be back with a manipulative asshole she was with before I was born. She has never been there for me. I can't stand the woman and I look forward to her being out of my life. I could care less what happens to her and I will not be attending her funeral.

[@mysteryjesus]

***** Yes she passes on what was dumped onto her despite being told that it was bullshit and she continues to buy into it. But I realize I need her out of my life if I am going to heal and that's what I've done. I never should have let her back but all my other family members were hounding me to let her back in because she's your mother. I did and what happened? She turned on me again. That was the last time that will ever happen to me.

[@mysteryjesus]

***** Thanks for responding I appreciate it. Yes that's definitely what I am fighting against. I had no idea that this child was coming out until a few weeks ago. I hope I can find this chapter in that book.

[@kidsmoked]

Do yo think your mother was a narcissist? Sounds like it to me.

[@wintergoosey6412]

I understand this experience. I also had the same kinda mother. I realize l cannot have her in my life. Either . I have shamed myself for not having her in my life. And let her visit or visited . Big, mistakes. In retrospect. I have realized , It's too destructive to be around her. It's sad to realize l have never had,a real mother. I have suffered much as,a,result.

[@batfink274]

love this man, he changed my life for the sooo much better via Homecoming. I would however just like to correct him on the last thing he said about parenting being the hardest job, or rather add something to that, and that is that parenting is the hardest job in the world - to do well.

[@kimvannote5024]

Love this man

[@BeingMe23]

I think most people don't realize the human animal. Is still somewhat primitive and trying to adapt to a industrialized society.

[@jvm-tv]

Thanks for posting. This is a piece of gem. If you like this talk also read the book which goes into much more details and depth.

[@moshiacsun6573]

John Bradshaw is my mentor. He was introduce to me at a Recovery Home called "Live Again" by Bill Maggio a great drug counselor. I didnt know i was "Shamed Based", from a "Dysfunctional Family."

[@MichaelYeager1949]

Very important in getting and saying drug, alcohol, behavioral addiction free.

[@AprilWatters]

We need a lecture for people who Have NO shame!!

[@BeingMe23]

I remember watching all these videos on TV in the early 1980 when I was about 13 yes old.. I was very intrigued of John.

[@Lorelle1020]

I stumbled across your comment - it has to be the most true and honest statement I have ever seen on yt. People don't realize how being there for someone can ultimately help them truly transform their lives. Your a smart lady!

[@paolaniembro6847]

Thank you John, you have been mi therapist since I’ve been reading your books and listening your conferences.

[@scorpiocat69]

A Dynamic Speaker and Lecturer...his "The Family" book and video series is a Godsend. Thanks for posting..Glad to Subscribe!

[@MissEnna48]

I love this man!

[@AprilWatters]

We can also call Shame,, Spiritual/Emotional DEBT. Once you're in it,, It's not so easy to get out without help and support.

[@xCubano1963]

thanks for posting his stuff. he brings me to now instantly

[@mrs8792]

God bless you. RIP.

[@mallory5872]

I moved away from NYC to a "family values" community. 25 years later I'm saying what happened?! Any self esteem I managed to piece together seems to be gone. I should have stayed in NYC living in a little room on minimum wage. Happy hypnotic family values everyone! It's like NYC was a good hopeful dream I unfortunately woke up from.

[@Schlingsi]

This is gold!!

[@ormorphe]

This is excellent. I’m going to use it with EFT and Emotion Code. Thank you so much for sharing!

[@selah71]

Very nice. Really like Bradshaw. Thank you for these videos. 🤗

[@haroldbreer4119]

I have read a number of hus books and seen a few of his lectures and I think that he has so much insite into soon much and i return to alot of what he says

[@janicebeckett4824]

Janice B. Amen.

[@goodthinkingtvvlogs3820]

Great video series! Worth a watch, he has some insightful concepts.

[@yanpinghuang608]

Thank you for your ideas and it help me to explain how shame influence us, and how people got the same shame from those drunken.

[@jadamay9264]

It seems like Brene Brown is now carrying out the general message of his work. More people need to know about how shame may be affecting their lives.

[@inmyownwords9798]

I'm reminded of a scene in the Color Purple where Miss Sophia says, "Wanna sing & have it beat out cha." It was beaten out of me by those I loved. will get this book.. Peace & Blessings everyone

[@lifeisgood070]

Thank you.

[@laurapaul7660]

I love You John, great work, I have been praying I recently got revelation in amore in depth that trauma came and shame and hurt isolation from when God kicked satan out of heaven the warring that took place there are still mending connections in need, the lost tribes people who don't really realize how much they are needed and valued in Christ, those who need more connection in the Body of Christ mending repairing the breach

[@izak-jn3vi]

Toxic shame - wow - Never heard of it before until i went to a Kiniosologist . It appears to be the main issue for me. I hope i will be able to heal it.

[@t.johnson2966]

i. zak Toxic shame is a symptom of, Complex PTSD. I'm being treated for this. Really fascinating.

[@DepressionheroTM]

Shame is connected to depression. Thoughts like; "I shouldn't have done that, I am bad." can really pull us down, especially if we repeat them over and over again in our heads. Hi, my name is Omar and I was ashamed and depressed for a long time until I got help and got my life back. If you are feeling ashamed or depressed and looking for help, please see my YT depression self help videos on my DepressionHero channel.

[@activebryantsystems215]

Great Video

[@storybored972]

Bradshaw goes on to say somewhere that shamelessness is actually a feature of, a reaction to, toxic shame.

[@brianwalsh1401]

Toxic shame creates people who are shameful or shameless. the flip side of the same coin of I don't know who I am.

[@AprilWatters]

All we need is to have 1 person help us gain some leverage emotionally. Someone to be there JUST for us,, but most people are For themselves and don't know how to give.

[@janicebeckett4824]

April Watters I would say that they are wounded just like us. Just like we can't, they can't. No blame in this game.

[@jjsiegal1]

You are not alone my friend. Find an ACOA meeting....they have them online.

[@MrOphachew]

Shoot! this guy never knew my mother. She lived by what others thought and said about her. and believe we all heard about out when somebody said something to or about her. On top of that she liked to insist to us not to do or say something because of what others might think or say. Read "Toxic Parents" by Dr. Donna Forward and "The Birth Order Book" by Leman

[@TheCaithleen]

And for wakening the road before us

[@korglegend]

I recommend

[@francismausley7239]

Wish I had more healthy shame... "...there existeth in man a faculty which deterreth him from, and guardeth him against, whatever is unworthy and unseemly, and which is known as his sense of shame. This, however, is confined to but a few; all have not possessed and do not possess it." ~ Baha'i Faith

[@xee-oo4gf]

the people so 1970s! the lady's glasses at 5:07!!! but i do like what john is saying.

[@ish3357]

Shame based religion oppresses the soul I know about it

[@TatyanaLedyaeva]

is there any info or translated books of John in RUSSIAN? I really need this! thank you in advance

[@meikerieger2899]

I have a shame based personality

[@korglegend]

" A man of true science... uses but few hard words, and those only when none other will answer his purpose; whereas the smatterer in science... thinks, that by mouthing hard words, he proves that he understands hard things ". Herman Melville

[@jayc3141]

I know it's not how life works but is there a quick fix to this eliminating toxic shame?

[@mimijuneau5187]

Écoutez ;Le grand espoir 1 avec l autre John Bradshaw sur you tube it is bilingual wow in english it is the great hope 1 but write le grand espoir 1 it will be english and french God bless every one

[@HiHello-pq8rl]

The hardest job anyone will ever do is be a parent

[@BeingMe23]

Hi Hello Its a 24/7/365 lifetime job. Even when a child grows up. They will never stop being the parents baby. I say this out of 40 plus yrs of observation even though I have had no kids...

[@dalastpharaoh]

That what should have been written in the bible to really save souls.

[@AprilWatters]

And they're in Office! :P

[@xee-oo4gf]

what is "in foleys"?

[@kidsmoked]

xe 2349e0 probably a department store or a shop.

[@edwinrivera8818]

It's me I am

[@kevphillips02]

They call them psychopaths

[@paulafolsom3879]

What is the name of his book?#####

[@Nicefoolkilla]

Healing the shame that binds you .

[@squeaky_buddha]

If anyone would like to watch this entire show uninterrupted, I've uploaded the file here: kzbin.info/www/bejne/f3LFlmaMotqfpMk

[@Nunos645cgh]

Anyone else here because of Brad Goodman on the Simpsons?

[@bryandeaugust2387]

dude looks like dennis hopper

[@PeachesCourage]

Gloria Steinem noticed during one of her talks to an audience That the women in the room appeared as if they'd not room to stand and uncomfortable While the males appeared legs wide apart relaxed with themselves these are the shame of the females who are the producers of the child who is shamed. Mirrored at by the shamed perfect males and we are beaten used etc. because of these thinkings too.

[@Misslotusification]

Hummm................. some addictions are about control. There are multiple addictions, check out Jon Burras, Return To Nature, the 5 Pillars of Healing.

[@janicebeckett4824]

phoenix rising all addictions are about control.

[@Misslotusification]

I agree with you.

[@kidsmoked]

phoenix rising Narcissistic Personality Disorder is an addiction to control.

[@Misslotusification]

rainybroons Codependence too.

[@AprilWatters]

Too bad "They" don't know that! Thank you

[@LucindaNorreys1]

Never have shame

[@kevinberntson4239]

No, not really.

[@johmarie7]

From the 80´s? Funny. But now it seems a bit one dimentional.

[@mallory5872]

Parents are allowed to shame their children - that's probably why a lot of people have children to begin with. Parents decide if their children have value - right from the very start and society and the public school system follows their lead. And then the religious right pick it up from there. I hope God and Satan work out their differences soon 'cause I'm as sick of them as I am of my psychopathic parents and the phoney "family values" shaming "community."

[@pedrosmith4529]

Good message but the continuous religious references ruined it for me.

[@stevedoetsch]

If bigotry stops you from hearing truth that's a problem with you, not the speaker.

[@andreaberger7795]

bullshame

[@LeetStrats]

Why complicate? Choose happiness over negativity and life is wondrous

[@newcures7813]

Trauma isn’t healed by logic. It’s like telling shell-shocked vets to just get over and choose to be happy.

[@difficultbastard]

Emotive language, no substance. It's frustrating watching him talk and not really going anywhere, like a dog chasing it's tail.

[@dance4u850]

You are soooo wrong.

[@janicebeckett4824]

Why do you think he's not going anywhere? What do you need? What is missing in you that you want to hear?

[@ThyReturner]

@@janicebeckett4824 Good and humble response!

[@eh9641]

Janice Beckett I mean, his user name is actually the answer to everyone’s question about what this guys issue is😂