KILLER WHALES: "Shark Tank" for CRYPTO GAMES?! (REACTION)

[@warpvector]

This whole show clearly exists just to normalize and legitimize crypto. There's no prizes, the panelists don't say or ask anything valuable, and the people pitching don't really pitch anything. But hey there's a show about crypto! That means it's real. They probably filmed the whole season in a day.

[@sealeo5772]

The entire crypto ecosystem is just about this kind of legitimacy seeking. The reason why ads in Time Square are such an obsession for crypto projects is more for internal propaganda than growing the network and NFTs just exist as a way to make a product that you need cryptocurrency for. They need mass adoption to be forced onto the world to make their ideas make sense, and so they try to force it as much as they can.

[@KA-vs7nl]

​@@sealeo5772 little do you know that people you will never see, hidden away in castles in Europe and elsewhere, want to force crypto on you in any way possible, so they let the dogs out because it doesnt matter. you will swallow the crypto pill one way or the other.

[@Joe90h]

Man, this Phantom Galaxies guy just spamming "We intend to become successful and that will fix everything" and none of the judge-sharks immediately calling him on such a wishy washy mission statement is why I'll never understand why people get so drawn in to this mindset.

[@JAUWNCUBE]

Literally an NPC with 99 charisma

[@ProfessorSnitch]

"How do you intend on avoiding failure?" "We intend to not fail." "Amazing."

[@palmathellama2029]

I actually worked for this company. This guy was my boss, they did not become successful. Myself and many others were laid off. Phantom Galaxies was never going to work.

[@thecorbohole3637]

Every single one of these interviews is the "Sharks" asking a question and then the person basically saying buzzwords and not answering. Like "who is the target audience for this game?" is met with "there will be two kinds of players, those who have paid and those who haven't." It's kind of a perfect microcosm of crytpo as a whole.

[@paxmen2264]

when you're in such a volatile environment like crypto you naturally get volatile interviews, so you're creating volatile answers to volatile questions

[@thecorbohole3637]

@@paxmen2264 Volatile!

[@zscout1288]

SNES has battery saves

[@alfonsalenius2482]

My favourite thing about this show is how theyre not even winning anything monetary. No money, no sponsorship or anything like that. Theyre winning like. "Exclusive Guidance" or whatever

[@toomanyaccounts]

promotional package from CoinMarketCap worth 100k according to the website. yeah the show does a real bad job at showing what 5/5 gets the winning projects

[@daranyillh6446]

"this product takes 10,000 to produce" right after saying "we've spent 200,000 on it and we will soon be bankrupt"

[@thekateirwin]

The show was designed by crypto bros. Hello Labs is a pro-crypto company run by 1 guy. Three of the judges in this ep are crypto KZbin influencers and another one of them is a Twitter influencer pumping the bored apes.

[@JAUWNCUBE]

Influencer is a sad word to describe these people. Their channels are ghost towns with nothing but bot interactions. It’s so strange. Who pays them to shill their coins when their audience is just bots? What is any of this even being done for? Oh well, it’s funny.

[@delsin1126]

The show is like all these crypto games: confused and terrible media that’s usually a scam

[@zYamiGuto]

The conversations are so strange... I want to believe that the series is not scripted, but the participants who come to show their projects don't say anything that makes coherent sense and people just act as if they understood everything, like... What??? And after about 4 or 5 questions, they start to give the grade on the project without even knowing the same information they asked the previous participants... Man, what a bizarre program...

[@SeruKgoeszomg]

I watched this live and my brain was melting trying to figure this out. At one point I was convinced only the crypto lady was scripted and everyone else was not, but I honestly don’t know. AI scripted maybe? The projects are “real” though. Did they all pay to be on there? Ahhhh

[@sammoore2242]

I assume there was more actual questioning and at least some of it is bizarre editing choices? Might be giving too much benefit of the doubt.

[@zYamiGuto]

​@@sammoore2242 I thought the same thing, maybe the editing removed questions to improve the passing of the episode, I hope 😅

[@draconis17]

just think about what we're witnessing here. We're watching a bunch of scam artists with practically nothing to show for themselves walk up to a bunch of nobodies and give their two sentence sales pitch, so that those nobodies can ask the most softball questions you've ever heard. Of course, even with easy questions, the scam artist have to give the most vague answers possible, because they have literally nothing of substance. Then the nobodies say either "it's cool" or "it's lame", and that's it. Nothing even happens whichever one they say. Each section takes like two minutes. This feels so unbelievably hollow, even for a crypto project, it's insane. How anybody could see this and think it made crypto look good is beyond me.

[@eddiii4030]

I don't know if anything will ever hit me as hard as the woman not knowing that video game saves are possible without NFTs. Edit: happens at 3:46

[@P__114]

Timestamp please?

[@NutyRiver]

I literally had to pause the video and go take a walk

[@gemcorker3982]

I literally shouted at my husband "WHY WOULD YOU TELL ON YOURSELF LIKE THAT??" holy fuck never thought I'd live to see someone trying to argue the blockchain is like a save game function & that's better than no save game function.

[@larrymantic2635]

Then your metamask gets hacked and *boop* . There goes your save data. My god, that’s dumb as heck.

[@Jokoko2828]

@@larrymantic2635 At least I can copy my saves so I don't lose them, can't fucking do that with crypto stuff.

[@dartz005]

As someone who grew up with a Sega Genesis, I was facepalming so hard when Wendy O was talking about "saving" a game on the blockchain. I played Sonic 2 so much, that I have parts of some of the levels memorized. And, this might sound weird, but with the rereleases of the game, I miss the lag that happened in multiplayer. And back then, I knew that some games could be saved on-cart, with classics like Shining Force. This show was stupid from its inception, but the backwards logic of these people is just mindblowing at times.

[@Igotthis3011]

i lost braincells when that lady talked about saving her game. it's been standard have a save game feature since NES days like when was the last time you even played a video game.

[@atenia606]

Your commentary is literally the only thing that would hook me to watch such a show, lol. Great job at enduring this stupidity and making it a fun experience, really love the way you deliver info and your thoughts

[@AgentHeroic]

It's incredible that if you do even five minutes of due diligence, you can find out that all of these 'games' were nothing but completely trash fire miserable failures.

[@TrumanTheGrayMerchant]

An underated dumb statement was "scamming and cheating won't be a problem because the game will be so successful that people will just earn legitimately." ???

[@KochDerDamonen]

Probably the funniest part of this show is the hosts talking big with experience they do no have, and having a big smirk on their face while they do it. Aside from being an attempt at an extended crypto ad, I think everyone here just really wanted to roleplay as the shark tank guys.

[@thelonleyUchiha1]

They want to pretend their millionaires and big successful buisness people like the sharks and hope no one looks up what their worth.

[@vitowidjojo7038]

Thank you for the subway surfer gameplay, i can cleanse my eye occasionally

[@FeelsGouda]

I don't know if I should laugh or cry watching those.

[@snoozlewoozle]

The second pitch scares me. Unlike mistplay, they made it sound as if it would work by overlaying third party games not integrated inside the app. In the pitch they opened google. So theyre catching keystrokes and screen recording? No way dude

[@RealDeWatch]

"Serial Entrepreneur": "Gaming and crypto are a perfect match" Jauwn's entire channel: 😭

[@user-semenar]

Gaming and crypto are a perfect match... for success of a KZbin review channel

[@heartware4616]

Not gonna pretend I wasn't watching the Minecraft gameplay more than the show

[@JizzMasterTheZeroth]

Ms. "I was a cashier at age 14 so I know business" is also a gamer despite not knowing how to save. I wonder if she has ever voted - that would basically make her a senator.

[@vizthex]

wait, they don't even give them funding or anything? the fuck is the point lmfao

[@toomanyaccounts]

advertising plus promotional package from CoinMarketCap supposedly worth a 100k. the show intro isn't really clear on what 5/5 gets them

[@TheMrAmras]

Completly unrelated, you can't convince me that the guy in 10:55 is supposed to be different from the one in 11:14 it's just a lie. Edit : you noticed it at the end lmao Anyway : "How would you compare to game like Roblox ? - We would be better - Genius"

[@golfknut777]

This is hilarious, you need to stream more Jauwn!

[@WillaGem]

it's so funny that they clearly could only afford scaramucci for one episode; that or maybe someone thought having the guy who got fired from his job as trump's press sectary after 10 days actually wasn't a good look

[@lostsauce0]

4:03 I had to pause and stare blankly into the abyss to process

[@Nocturnalux]

Oh sweet lord…! This lady! THIS LADY!!

[@shinyflygon8883]

43:42 Never imagined I'd say this, but he can count. One didn't support or deny him. The "judge" "floated", whatever that actually means in the end. If you ignore that one, he got 4 "swims from the other 4 "judges".

[@novelezra]

You know what the Sega Genesis; the greatest 16-bit console ever because it has Rocket Knight Adventures - was missing? Web3. What the fuck is a savestate?

[@gemcorker3982]

Rocket Knight Adventures is legit one of my husband's most fave games & now I'm imagining the evil pig wizards fighting Sparkster with The Chain Blocker - a wonky mech made of blocks & chains in an attempt to trap him in a cage or smth.

[@novelezra]

@@gemcorker3982 Your husband is a keeper

[@gemcorker3982]

@@novelezra he most definitely is!

[@hivehum]

the minecraft parkour video fell off the track and cheated at 16:45 ish and im so mad about it edit: 37:40 they cheated again!!!!!! no integrity!!!!!!!

[@Crispypom]

Ooh I was waiting! Will there be a “reaction” for each episode? (Like an entire series?)

[@JAUWNCUBE]

yes but these are the only two i have done so far. I'm gonna livestream again this weekend and watch 2 or 3 more, so we will probably get through the entire series in 2-3 more weeks

[@Crispypom]

@@JAUWNCUBE yay! Would totally look forward to it, though I don’t think I can watch it live due to time zone issues 😅

[@jauwn]

@@Crispypom What time zone are you in? I might stream in the early afternoon EST

[@Crispypom]

@@jauwn I am from India (GMT+ 5hr 30 min) I did manage to catch the last episode on stream rn, it was entertaining! the time was actually perfect for me but i missed it since had to complete some research work and didn't check my notifications :(

[@user-ex5pg3oy9c]

Good vid mate

[@minikawildflower]

Crypto invented autosave

[@Fragenzeichenplatte]

Wow I did not realize that there were two twins there. I thought it's just the one person.

[@Dargos_L]

Brazil mentioned!!!!11! And we really don't understand how this works and isn't a scam.

[@snil4]

45:20 You mean a jauwnscare? Also these guys didn't show a single frame of games, they might as well sell me canned air from the moon and that would be more enticing

[@gateroozeink5061]

So I look up Blowfish and find a former employee is working there. Good coder, great guy - though he was into crypto. Hopefully he is working on their other games and not this one.

[@JAUWNCUBE]

An employee of yours? very interesting!

[@gateroozeink5061]

@@JAUWNCUBE In a former life, that is... but he was a server engineer for World Of Tanks and Adobe so had some chops.

[@christyioran2969]

I understand that there really isn't any incentive to make good crypto games, but it's truly fascinating that crypto game developers universally decided to make bad games instead of just making any half decent games

[@kendokaaa]

If you're dumb enough to make a crypto game, you're not competent enough to know how to make a good game

[@skayodev]

I thought this woman grew up "very, very poor" but apparently they could afford a Sega Genesis??? Something doesn't add up...

[@notapplicable6985]

It could be she was 'poor' in a rich area

[@cherry9787]

​@@notapplicable6985 Maybe her neighbors had Ferraris but her family had a Cadillac

[@Pururut]

I love mr name lastname (not an alt at all) trying to defend crypto in chat

[@davidduckett6242]

Omg the subway surfer screen in screen is hilarious

[@zerogravy7446]

THE SCAMS ARE BAD. Incredible.

[@Guimhj]

29:00 there's two types of players: those who own shit and those who own shit

[@dmoonmaster1653]

The worst part of the show for me is that they've edited out like 80% of the actual pitches and kept in boring irrelevant questions. The whole thing is incoherent.

[@CainXVII]

36:33 Aggroed??? That guy looks like he actually looks like a huge teddy bear and is compensating in every way possible

[@bewilderbeestie]

The biggest takeaway I got from this is that Minecraft Parkour is apparently a thing? Was that a real human playing that?

[@soapppppppp]

minecraft parkour has been around for so long

[@M50A1]

I learned how to parkour in other games because of Minecraft parkour lol

[@davidduckett6242]

I mean if skull and bones is AAAA, this is definitely AAA

[@Cookie9666.]

I had a hard time watching due to the subway surfers video/parkour/GTA cars i could only imagine your KZbin feed after that

[@PaulHofreiter]

How did I not realize you had a second channel! This crypto shark tank show is hilariously bad; I can’t see how anyone takes it seriously but goddamn if it isn’t great content.

[@toomanyaccounts]

its a enjoyable trainwreck and season two is underway

[@Luna_Everywhere]

Netvrk's name is probably a referennce to the retvrn meme/dogwhistle, so it's likely not just stupid but also hateful

[@chadbranston9741]

Yay another metaverse project, speaking of, what is going on with earth2?

[@JAUWNCUBE]

they announced some sort of 3d game and i applied for the beta test but never got accepted

[@chadbranston9741]

@@JAUWNCUBE so nothing as usual then haha

[@Skooma777]

OK wait I'm an idiot its probably to avoid copyright issues.

[@BlisaBLisa]

14:52 no i dont think its ignorance its just people who are out of touch with humanity lol. i dont know how else to describe it, its a type of person whos life is centered around money to the point they dont see value in basic human expiriences unless theyre monetized

[@BlisaBLisa]

39:44 her fucking reaction lmao

[@BlisaBLisa]

im pretty sure this guy was sent a shitpost that he took seriously

[@Guimhj]

@32:55 they need bigger fools for their bigger fool scheme

[@milkmann-on1dq]

It doesn't have to be like this

[@CainXVII]

You know, jumpscares don't work if you announce them first 😂

[@JAUWNCUBE]

Well I didn’t want to give everyone a heart attack 😂 that wouldn’t be very nice

[@ggwagmi1236]

if you observe these people you can see how brainwashed cryptobros and devs are most of the time they act like cultist they say something and you can sometimes hear them say another like some sort of cry for help

[@imaginerejector1429]

This show, beyond anything else, is not really like Shark Tank. Yes, a group of people react to products. But they're not investing in them, as far as we see, nor are the product creators asking for an investment/discussing what they need to progress their product. This would be like if I got friends in a room and was like "do you think this is cool?" And saw what they say.

[@fatersteve]

You don't sound like that guy

[@FowCowMow]

Jauwn, JAUWN, you gotta get rid of the endless runner, its so distracting, holy shit

[@JAUWNCUBE]

The masses crave dopamine

[@Skooma777]

Why have a random box of subway surfers gameplay if it's not even you playing it? Not to nitpick but I'm imagining this is to combat people's short attention spans or something? I think your audience is mature enough to be able to sit through a video without constant stimulation lol.

[@JAUWNCUBE]

Lol nah it's not cause of copyright, it's kind of just a meta-joke about short attention spans, plus I think it's pretty funny. But it actually does boost watch time and engagement because people's attention spans are cooked, no matter how mature thtey are

[@bookle5829]

​@@JAUWNCUBE I can vouch for that. lmao

[@physicsunderstander4958]

@@JAUWNCUBE Thank you jauwn, if not for the subway surfer key jingling my brain would have escaped to another video 20 minutes ago like a squealing guinea pig bum rushing a upended jug of corn syrup

[@Skooma777]

Thanks Jauwn, I didn't realize this was a bit. Love your stuff man, I'm looking forward to more of this style of content.

[@JAUWNCUBE]

i figured most people would just watch this on the 2nd monitor anyway, it's not exactly the most visually edited, wanted to focus more on a good listening experience

[@davidsaenz6912]

The mobile game on the top left corner is unbearable, actually makes the video harder to watch. keep that stuff to tiktok

[@JAUWNCUBE]

Sorry bro won't do it again