Kumail Nanjiani Goes on a Rant About Why He Hates Turkey

[@ChipCain]

Could watch him in anything. Brilliant presence.

[@roscoemuttley]

I just like him. I am mysteriously proud of his success. He seems like he would be a good neighbor

[@dawnmillsap285]

Kumail is so handsome and so loveable.

[@darksun6096]

Your eyes 🤣

[@lisavandenhoven5672]

"Reset yourselves." Best follow up to breaking the audience.

[@elifultramarine1]

As a Turkish person, I was 🤏 this close being offended..

[@misterh544]

I thought it was about turkey too.😂

[@shahabuddin2802]

@@AliHussain-fz7pd Bro stop simping so hard for Turkey in public, you're embarrassing us Pakistanis.

[@umair.a]

It's Turkiye now

[@AliHussain-fz7pd]

@@shahabuddin2802 sorry, I concede that I shouldn't have said that in public. I was there over the summer & had a great time but fine..I'm deleting the comment.

[@shahabuddin2802]

@@AliHussain-fz7pd Bro, I honestly can't believe you are a Pakistani. How are you so polite!? 😅 Anyways, I wasn't serious. And I apologize for my comment.

[@AC3handle]

Back in the day, I was young enough, that my first exposure to chippendales was the chris farley sketch.

[@phoenixluk]

The crowd work on this one.

[@GlennTillema]

I can't blame them for not liking turkey; most people don't know how to cook it. I was that way with a few vegetables like brussel sprouts and cauliflower until I learned that roasting most vegetables makes them 100x better.

[@CHIIIEEEEEEEEFFFFSSS]

This is part of the problem for most people. The rest of the problem is that it DOESN'T TASTE GOOD.

[@daltongrowley5280]

Thank you! Kumail laying down the truth.

[@nedim_guitar]

My mother in law makes amazing turkey! Juicy, tender, salty but not too much, it tastes great! And we're Bosnians in Sweden.

[@DanHarkless_Halloween_YTPs_etc]

In fairness, and knowing E.U. dietary laws, you might have better-quality turkeys there. I know in the U.S. they did a lot of manipulation of the commercial turkey genome, to make them bigger, with broader breasts, faster-growing, more disease-resistant in bad living conditions, etc., but not necessarily tastier.

[@nedim_guitar]

@@DanHarkless_Halloween_YTPs_etc That might be true. We usually grab around 4-5 kilos turkeys (approx 8.8-11 pounds). But yeah, even in the EU we've got chickens that weigh over 2 punds, and it didn't used to be that way. Hens are supposed to be larger, chickens are obviously smaller. But that industrial production of meats is really messed up... I'm slowly moving towards complete vegetarian or even vegan diet just because the meat industry is awful. But I'm not there yet haha!

[@DanHarkless_Halloween_YTPs_etc]

@@nedim_guitar Nice! I'm lucky enough to have been raised a vegetarian (and never lapsed, except for once when I was homeless, jobless, without Food Assistance, and was having to eat leftovers out of trash cans 😬), so that's been easier for me. Was a vegan for awhile after I learned I'm mildly casein-intolerant, but I love cheese and yogurt too much, and the non-dairy substitutes for those just don't compare. So now I just stick to eating ethically raised dairy products and eggs (as long as I can afford it). (Oh yeah, forgot to mention one of the other alterations they made to commercial turkeys was eliminating their dark pin feathers, which may have also had an unexpected negative effect on the cookability / taste.) In any case, thanks for the international perspective!

[@justsaying14]

Do you know The Jolly Bosniak?

[@nedim_guitar]

@@DanHarkless_Halloween_YTPs_etc Thank you for sharing your experiences too! Sounds like it was a rough time, let's hope it never goes back to that. Take care!

[@rayvincente]

I had no idea how hilarious he is!

[@melrest3453]

He did a major glow up!

[@NewMessage]

Hating turkey is the most American thing they can do at Thanksgiving. They're doin' it right.

[@asadmahmood2007]

Can someone let Kumail know that it's okay if he's gay.

[@samaraisnt]

@@asadmahmood2007 ugh, go away.

[@WindFireAllThatKindOfThing]

@@asadmahmood2007 Looking at your avatar pic...bruh, just come out already. And also...do you a certified pre-owned version of that model on the lot?

[@exqueue3813]

So many people dislike Turkey because all sorts of people who NEVER cook whole poultry take a shot at it once a year.

[@sunshine3914]

Turkey was the only meat I liked growing up. Like a lot of other things, it doesn’t taste anything like it did 30 years ago. And that’s because, like everything else, it’s bred & hormoned to be slaughtered in the shortest amount of time possible… which for a turkey nowadays, is 4 months. For certain ones, it’s 7 months. To me, it’s inedible.

[@janelliot5643]

Kumail is the funniest comic actor of this generation - an unexpected gift

[@paulmrjohnson]

He looks like Steve Carrell in the clip; I thought he'd be a dancer after getting into Marvel shape.

[@asadmahmood2007]

Can someone let Kumail know that it's okay if he's gay.

[@eddiek8179]

@@asadmahmood2007 Are you projecting or just an asshole who loves throwing allegations about someone you don't know?

[@janelliot5643]

@@asadmahmood2007 it is fine if he's gay, but I don't think he is. LOOK WITHIN

[@moesiek2496]

@@janelliot5643 Well he looks like keeping in mind his roots no one from us would have said that juicier!

[@eringuneri3729]

I literally thought this was gonna be about the country not the meat😭

[@kotkaconforza]

😂

[@Nacson222]

omg same😂😂😂

[@jonathanperry8331]

Me too. Aren't we a bunch of fools.

[@Yannis1a]

And this is why it is now writen as "Türkiye"

[@gaywizard2000]

Right!?!?!?

[@rudiwaldschrat8796]

Classic two meanings: I clicked this vid cause I thought he was going to talk about the country turkey...

[@paulmrjohnson]

Everything is better with gravy on it.

[@matthewharry2803]

Please do some more standup kumail!

[@nikkorocksalot5254]

Man I love Kumail's vibe so much. I miss Indoor Kids

[@asadmahmood2007]

Can someone let Kumail know that it's okay if he's gay.

[@nikkorocksalot5254]

@@asadmahmood2007 he knows, but he isn't and I'm pretty sure his wife agress

[@ericminch]

The problem is, it's almost impossible to cook turkey in such a way that the white breast meat is not dry and the dark leg and back meat is not still bloody. It can be done, but it requires practice and dedication and attention, which the average home cook has never had to use. The reason Grandma's turkey was so good was that she'd been doing it for 50 years. She had experience and patience. These are in short supply these days.

[@barbaratran3146]

Look into spatchcocking a turkey where you take out the backbone and lay the turkey out more flat. It cooks more evenly that way and reduces the cook time too!

[@pollyjazz]

Exactly! Most people don't like turkey because it's rare nowadays that you will actually eat one that has been well done like our grandma used to make. Also it seems to me that most people think you have to do the whole bird. In the country i live in now it is very common to buy turkey meat cut into steaks. White or dark meat, a good alternative to beef or pork steaks. Really nice done in a pan with some cream and mushrooms.

[@bigpoppasquat6330]

I’ve gone beyond spatchcocking to just cutting the turkey up like a chicken. Cooked perfectly in about 90 minutes.

[@whakjob]

of course all grandma's are in short supply lol. people leave them alone or send them off to homes where they suffer depression

[@sahej6939]

I do the rolled stuffed breasts separate butter 🧈 & spice rubbed… 🦵the turkey legs cooked differently and separate

[@burtbackattack]

I'm reading the thumbnail thinking "the bird or the country? I really hope it's the bird"

[@raizin4908]

I didn't think of the bird and thought "gotta be about the increasingly authoritarian government, right?"

[@awddfg]

@@raizin4908 "government" boo hoo

[@jenniferflynn4948]

I actually cook a full thanksgiving dinner, turkey, homemade stuffing, mashed & gravy, at least 4 times a year. We love turkey. And think that turkey…smothered in gravy…is amazing 😊

[@우사민-r3c]

Thanksgiving, Christmas, maybe at New Year's but the fourth day?

[@ericminch]

@@우사민-r3c Good question. Easter? Independence Day?

[@우사민-r3c]

@@ericminch Good guesses. I hadn't considered Easter. It might even be just a special day for this commenter like his/her anniversary.. etc.

[@teranmm]

Mashed potatoes and stuffing all mixed together with the Turkey and gravy goes crazy!

[@clarisahernandez5280]

"Let's look at furniture at night" 😆😆😆.

[@gediminasa.1914]

Jesus, he literally is Gigachad. That jaw needs a license

[@hepcatliz]

3:17 when Seth's brain catches up 🤣🤣

[@nonameronin1]

Turkey masala would be amazing.

[@wbaldwin666]

All I can think of is Abott and Costello... now about my Chip n Dale movie. Oh this is a different movie.

[@Kaan_is_myname97]

Love him

[@TheStringBreaker]

*Kumail killing it!*

[@genevarockeman9721]

The My Favorite Murder episode about Chippendales is excellent and totally hyped me up for the series 😎👉👉

[@MsKitcloudkicker]

4:40 I recently had to explain to a younger person about Chippendales was the the first version of Magic Mike 😂

[@thebuccaneersden]

Lol, this gent is hilarious :)

[@alwaysuseless]

At a very young age, I thought "turkey" was the dressing, because everyone made a big fuss about the turkey, and I really liked the dressing, not so much what turned out to be the actual turkey.

[@samaraisnt]

That makes total sense as people raving about that dry overcooker tasteless bird makes no sense at all.

[@BigSnipp]

You confused a cooked bird with ranch dressing?

[@tonygrowley5275]

@@BigSnipp That 'joke' is as tasteless as turkey.

[@benda18]

When you say dressing do you mean salad dressing or the turkey dressing, which is more like stuffing?

[@tonygrowley5275]

@@benda18 Maybe it's a dressing gown? or window dressing? What is wrong with you people?

[@bubblesezblonde]

6:11~Seth's evil grin as Nanjiana realizes he has been jackaled... 6:30 and made it look easy.

[@Welcometotheclipshow]

I thought the clip title was about the country, not the food. Turkey (the country) has its problems but im not sure why my brain went there first considering the season

[@GLOmorous22]

It's unbelievable how sharp his jawline is now that he got buff, I always wondered what is it about male actors who buff up, get a razor sharp jawline. Am I the only one? Regardless, he's funny as hell in everything he's in, love Kumail.

[@InconvenientFactz]

Could also be some filler 🤗

[@zefersanity6537]

everyone knows he took HGH n steroids for the marvel role

[@jmack129]

When you slim down/lose weight, it shows in your face most prominently for most people, especially men.

[@lynnebucher6537]

Overcooked, dried out turkey is gross. If properly prepared, ut can be divine, buy it definitely has a different flavor. Plus the fact we don't have it often makes it stand out more.

[@queenvrook]

I was four minutes in before I realized he hates the bird, not the country

[@calisongbird]

Seriously?? This was posted Thanksgiving week 😂

[@generalZee]

Erogdan's Intelligence agents looking at this intently.

[@pete209]

When I first read the title I thought, OMG what happened to him in Istanbul?

[@deakensomoza3305]

Kumail Nanjiani was going to Pixar Animation Studio, Kumail Nanjiani wants to perform Fantastic Beasts and Kumail Nanjiani is gonna be in PAW Patrol: The Mighty Movie.

[@manz007]

he is going to voice act for the Migration animated movie .

[@sahej6939]

I enjoyed the first 2 episodes of Kumail’s show! It’s very seedy LA 1980! Very Seedy

[@Cobralalalala]

I love turkey and eat it all year. I just only cook a whole one once a year, because it's a multiday process.

[@ellenlandowski1659]

Deep frying = 20 minutes.

[@qwertyuiop1st]

Turkey might only rarely be my first choice for which animal corpse I should consume, but turkey gets a lot of unjustified 'hate' - turkey is a perfectly fine meat and works well in nearly every dish that chicken, beef, or pork, are usually used in.

[@rolinmaiz1694]

Sure....

[@jonathanperry8331]

I had two friends in college that decided to go to a male strip club and compete in a contest in which both of them won but our college advisor was there. Awkward. I think they both won like $600.

[@samaraisnt]

I meeeannn, they won $600!?

[@jonathanperry8331]

@@samaraisnt yeah this was back in the early 2000s. They got $600 each plus tips. I don't know what the rules exactly were because I was not there. So that was a month's rent for a Wednesday night. They did it for a couple months made good money. It was kind of a dare and they did it and made some money so they kept doing it for a while. I just think it's hilarious that our personal college counselor was there when they were auditioning.

[@Cocpain]

The thing about turkey is when cooking as a whole bird it is the easiest thing to take from perfectly done, to over cooked (dried out). I mean cooking it right only makes it slightly better, but if you are sticking a probe into the thickest spot of the bird (or using the pop timer) and getting that spot to the suggested temp you already started the drying out process, and once you pull it from the oven it continues to cook for a bit making it worse... at this point, I am thankful for gravy... stupid yard bird.

[@fionaclaphamhoward5876]

Brining it is a game changer! Dry brining in the fridge is even easier than a wet brine and just adds so much juiciness, much harder to mess up the cooking this way.

[@supermilkguy]

Kumail is handsome. But I love turkey with stuffing and gravy and cranberry sauce

[@dakotac180]

Yeah ham is a way better but originally we should all be eating clams, the Wampanoag people deserve so much more recognition on that day...

[@JonnyDIY]

We had Chicken tonite, not because we hate Turkey, (We're equal opportunity carnivores) but because it's just too much food! Smallest one I could find was 12lbs 😄💕🦃🍗👍

[@thevoid99]

i prefer chicken over turkey. turkey is overrated.

[@rachel_rexxx]

We eat Pot Roast instead of Turkey. Gobble gobble? Moo

[@colinfewell2943]

Try bbq Turkey in KC, tho it's mostly about the sauce

[@smokeywilly4364]

Totally thought the title of this video was referring the the country Turkey xD

[@jeffhodge7333]

Across the country, delicatessens sell millions of turkey sandwiches every day of the week. Americans just do not want to cook turkey at home except on Thanksgiving.

[@rolinmaiz1694]

That's cause it's a process. I had to prep four turkeys at work last night. Eck.

[@patriciabagby90]

I love turkey! And I make it more often. But it does take awhile to roast.

[@christinalynn8143]

🙈🙉🙊, 🦃 🕊️, 🙂🤗. Human relationship, Friendship, Love/Kindness. Grateful not hateful. Gratitude. Happy Holiday Season, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year!! !

[@georgeb.wolffsohn30]

Turkey is a hard bird to cook just right.

[@NoirOsain]

I thought he probably talking about Türkiye, little I knew it's thanksgiving time

[@benr3799]

6:04 I sighed so hard to this

[@asadmahmood2007]

Can someone let Kumail know that it's okay if he's gay.

[@redcomet0079]

@@asadmahmood2007 *he’s married. Stop projecting*

[@constancewalsh3646]

I think Seth is in love with him.

[@bluecollarmenproductions]

My sister doesn’t like turkey we don’t have it on thanksgiving and it’s fine stuffing is where it’s at

[@Spatial_Computer]

More like one day a year we eat non-processed meat. Turkey is on sandwiches guys.

[@amethystpeony]

Most people overcook turkey and make it worse by repeatedly opening the oven. Do NOT baste. Turkey is best left alone to cook. Two of my three sons do not like any kind of turkey. I made a turkey breast and mini ham this year. Over on Kimmel, Guillermo and his family have chicken because they don't like turkey either. It also was not likely eaten at the "first thanksgiving".

[@pooie0116]

All my life I've heard about people hating roast turkey, but I have a feeling they just don't know how to make it. My herb-roasted bacon-draped turkey is so juicy and scrumptious, I make it at least four or five times a year and my whole family loves it.

[@georgeb.wolffsohn30]

Relleno Negro is the best way to do turkey.

[@kasondaleigh]

How is he so good looking? ❤️

[@helveticaification]

this post has the wrong title - no turkey mentioned.

[@NewMessage]

My favorite part of this segment is *that part* ! Right?

[@TJfromEarth]

New Message and random late night TV show comments, name a more dynamic duo

[@asadmahmood2007]

Can someone let Kumail know that it's okay if he's gay.

[@MuzikAficionado]

Lol @ classic two meanings! Turkey must be glad to have reverted to its name Turkiye in English too!

[@WhatsAHandleMyNameIsJoe]

I saw the title of this video, and had to click on it. oh how you tempt my curiosity.

[@qasimanwar5704]

Seth Myers woke up and came to the show in his pajamas

[@mikehamm45]

All I know about chippendales I learned from Chris Farley

[@AKingsQueen]

Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze. RIP to them both.

[@eddiek8179]

Man, from the title - I was thinking how is Kumail going to dance around eggshells hating a country? It's the bird. Nicely done.

[@daltongrowley5280]

Dude, same.

[@nicolecopland461]

WIRE?!? 😳😁 Chippendales is EXCELLENT.

[@melohhdy]

The Turkey thing is the same at Renaissance Festivals. Like. I don’t really ~want~ to get it. Buuuuut. It’s a Turkey leg at Ren Faire. I feel like I ~have~ to.

[@melohhdy]

Also “Turkey is chicken that had a bad day” is *chefs kiss*

[@mmariedennis]

Turkey tastes the way a wet dog smells. It takes a lot of gravy and Tabasco sauce to make it edible.

[@lb5368]

I'm sorry you've never been served a well-made turkey. It's a hard bird to get right!! But most of us could probably take it or leave it, tbh.

[@richardbrown4640]

Grow your own Turkey, it tastes better than any we bought from a store... better texture as well...

[@justanyperson]

im so happy to our country name changed to “Turkiye”. its not turkey anymore. i just prepared myself to defend my country but i can see you talk about the bird one. anyway i never ate turkey i dont know the taste of it.

[@rolinmaiz1694]

It's nothing to miss. No worries.

[@ETS186]

That's probably why 😂

[@blahblahblahEMILY]

he's so fine

[@eyeDavid]

Don’t watch this in public, you will be smiling like an idiot

[@Kilkenny1923]

What about the families who eat ham?

[@ETS186]

He doesn't care

[@jessicarichards8531]

nice. kumail knows what's up with poultry.

[@mytexasdays1526]

He is Rod Serling's twin brother.

[@ellenlandowski1659]

Fried Turkey is the best!!!!!

[@Mia7189]

Meh on Turkey. I always prepare a great beef roast on holidays.

[@madphantom92]

Good for you, sir. I love turkey because you only eat it once a year if lucky.

[@preoksaha4504]

Turkey is like a chicken having a bad day 😂

[@britturk123]

Stuffing is there for a reason gravy too.

[@MyHeart1955]

I’m with you on the turkey tastin’. Agreed. Native born, never left the ‘hood, USA - I DON’T CARE ABOUT TURKEY. I’ll eat it that one day but not more than once a years.

[@tragicrhythm]

Chocolate the turkey replaced the not so lucky turkey named Dale.

[@jannestrang]

Thought they meant the country.

[@WindFireAllThatKindOfThing]

Well, the last strippers I saw introduced on stage by the DJ were named Mercedes and Tiffany, so I think Chippendales falls within acceptable precedent, Kumail.

[@lucidreverie1867]

lol didn't realize so many people don't know how to cook turkey :D

[@dietotaku]

whole turkey, absolutely awful. i've never had good thanksgiving turkey. i honestly wish somebody sold a precooked duck that i could just warm up in the oven and have that instead. lunchmeat turkey, though, i don't know what they're doing to that stuff but it's GOOD. if we could have oscar meyer turkey sandwiches instead of whole roast turkey for thanksgiving i would be so happy.

[@abidanasreenqureshi8524]

Guys don't worry he isn't talking about Türkiye😂😂 He is a Pakistani so that is the least you can expect from him😅😅

[@BhuliBhuli]

As he should, it's an oppressive dictatorial regime with human rights violat... Oh, he's talking about the bird. I'm not a big fan of turkey either.

[@Ginric99]

I opened this thinking it was a rant about the country (lots to rant about there lol)

[@darkalityleonid4114]

Because of the capitalization, I really thought this would be about the nation of Turkey, and I was expecting something quite controversial

[@alianna8806]

I eat it whenever I can find it 😂

[@usaskjock]

I fucking love turkey

[@friendofbeaver6636]

Chip and Dale were cartoon squirrels.