Learning to Focus: A Focusing Demonstration

[@IzabellaEjzler]

Thank you, that was helpful 😊

[@Orangesky3]

Bless you for sharing as such. Such a gift. And Helpful. Thank you! I actually processed with you with a parallel-type situation and had a great process with insight and more.

[@christinabachman8361]

Thank you💚

[@BboyFever]

Thank you for sharing this deeply personal demonstration. It was extremely helpful.

[@KingJorman]

Good job. Really helpful in tandem with the book. Now the book instructions make more sense.

[@kwhiteley8951]

Beautiful ❤

[@christahindman5068]

It's helpful to see you track your situation in real time. When you say you sit with certain reactions or thoughts, what technique are you doing to keep focused on it?

[@stephaniesomebunny5193]

Hi! I’m a focusing oriented therapist, just thought I’d respond as I’m curious about your question and would like to see if I can offer some guidance. Is your question around how to “sit” reactions/thoughts/emotions? The technique we use in focusing is to see if we can stay with that thing which pops up by saying to ourselves or out loud to your companion or therapist you’re sitting with “I’m noticing something in me that feels… x”. By saying this you are acknowledging the thing and giving it a bit more space to exist, like offering it a seat at your table, or approaching it like a small animal coming out of the bushes. You might not even know what it is exactly yet but playing around with words or images to describe it is a way to check to see if that feels right with it and then you may be amazed at what more it can tell you once it feels listened to… or “sat” with as you’ve seen demonstrated in this video. I hope that helps, and often times this might be hard to conceptualise until you’ve experienced it personally. I recommend giving it a go right now by simply closing your eyes and asking, what am I noticing inside right now… waiting… then saying the phrase “I’m noticing something in me that feels/looks/is saying/is showing me an image of”…. And then asking it if that word you described it as feels right or if there is more there, if there is, stay with it and see if you can describe it even more.

[@christahindman5068]

@stephaniesomebunny5193 Thanks for clearing up my question. Sounds like it is going beneath the surface of the first thought/ reaction that comes to mind and then taking the essence of its quality and trying to describe it, checking if the description is right, and then unraveling it more. I think what you said about the feeling being listened to could be the goal, finding what resonates. Very helpful!

[@stephaniesomebunny5193]

@@christahindman5068 Wow, well done, I couldn’t have said it better myself. Yes you’ve got it. Going beneath to see what more is there sounds very right to me and I believe is even how Eugene Gendlin explains it in his book too. The person who taught me refers to it as an “unraveling” also. Yep, listening with interested curiosity is the goal and slowing down is the key to be able to give the thing that’s coming up your full attention. Good luck to you on your journey!

[@thelovelution3831]

@@stephaniesomebunny5193 Hi, I just want to add that the noticing something inside and sitting with it is the key thing. The "I'm noticing *something in me* that feels..." is characteristic of Inner Relationship Focusing. It's not necessary to the focusing practice to think of things as being parts of us. Just a note, not to correct but to expand because the way I learned focusing didn't use parts language.

[@Hyumanity]

Synchronicity that they texted :)

[@inthoreauswalls]

very good thank you

[@thinkbeyondhealing1829]

Of course! Glad you liked it. =)

[@cbass6399]

Wow