Living out of a suitcase isn’t going as planned... (starting over at 28)

[@mariaagosti-pm7tk]

Your lips look SO much better naturally. As soon as women start to change their faces artificially, they start to look older, now you look younger again.

[@youaintmymommaonperiodt8007]

This

[@tiffanyroseangeles34]

Nikki have you ever tried Dior lip oil? It’s really good and I think you’d really love it.

[@iloveyoiur9r2r]

Miss Niki, as someone who has moved over 25 times in their life (don't even ask lol) one thing that I've found to be undeniably true is that "wherever you go there you are". Moving can be a great thing, and I can personally attest to the fact that I've felt better living in certain places over others. But that's just one piece of a much larger puzzle, and I'd encourage you to keep in mind that moving is not going to automatically solve a lot of the internal discomfort you feel. Because of that, my (unsolicited) advice to you, wherever you do end up, is to really try and dial in to your community and set down roots. Give that place a fair shot. You seem like someone who has tendency to run away from your problems when life becomes difficult, and I say that as someone who does the EXACT same thing. It's exciting, but it's also exhausting, and it's okay to crave stability and routine as you get older. You are an earth sign after all ;) Wherever you do end up, it's probably going to take a while to feel like home and that's just the reality of the situation. Keep that in mind on the days that get hard. LA is a wonderful city, but like everywhere else it has its problems. Just remember that you're never going to find a place that checks ALL of your boxes, which is why it's so imperative to work on yourself first. The more that you step into your own, the easier it's going to be to figure out where you want to be long term. You may find that that's not LA and that's fine too. Wherever you do ultimately end up, just know we will all be along for the ride. Wishing you all the best in this new season of your life. You got this

[@Maadthreads]

As much as this comment is catered to Niki, I really needed to hear this for my own life. So thanks for sharing and for being so honest ❤

[@HumanityBeforeReligion]

This is absolutely true. A place to feellike home, it takes time. A lot of time

[@charghhhmaine1423]

I'm sorry but it tickled me when you realised your natural lips suit your face best 🤷‍♀️🤣 ofc they do Niki you and Gabi were very beautiful girls just to young to see what we all saw 🤷‍♀️ I'm glad your reaching that point in womanhood where you realised you are good enough and beautiful the way you are 💕🫶

[@mckenziejeanne4508]

This!

[@tabithabrown9989]

This x2

[@MabelRD08]

I'm glad she realized that. I never comment hers nor Gabi's decisions but I can openly say that I'm glad she's off that.

[@taylormadisonwolf]

I moved back in with my parents at the tender age of 28. I followed “the life guide” went to uni, got a degree, brought a house and I’d never been so miserable. I’ve just relocated interstate this week (soon to be age 31) and am living in a shared house and working my dream job as an associate lecturer at a university. Take time to heal.

[@allmonti9861]

I love this!!❤

[@wydlynnf5694]

change is hard, and it really goes to show how much of an impact it can have on someone. everyone goes through it, it just affects people differently.❤

[@rebeccamcauley4547]

Absolutely agree. Change and personal growth ✨️ ❤

[@DDD2323-z5i]

Niki, I can feel that you're moving in the right direction an creating a life for yourself that brings you joy. I love seeing that. I also struggle with anxiety, and seeing you talking so openly about your anxiety and mental health really helps me. I've watched you since I was a kid and I've always felt like you were my older sister. Seeing how far you've come makes me so proud and inspires me to pursue my dreams as well. I want to say thank you for being so authentic and inspiring me everyday. You're doing what's right for you and I love to see that. I hope 2024 is your best year yet. Love you, Niki ❤🫶

[@GetUpAndGlow]

I’m falling in love with these types of vlogs. It’s like seeing you get closer and closer to healing and finding your happiness. You shine a little brighter in each one💗🥹 so proud of you Nikki

[@HassanRaashid]

I think there's something really beautiful about being in the uncomfortable parts of life, especially with the way your handling it, it can be so scary but also something really great to grow from

[@ameliaaaahill1894]

yes it really is, being in hard times is so grounding and always gives a better grasp of gratitude after

[@amkii2]

Feeling anxious and scared about change is 100% normal and human. I appreciate that you're never afraid to show us your real and vulnerable side!

[@xokelseyxo9238]

Niki, I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with so much anxiety. I promise you, you are going to be okay. You are entering a new chapter of your beautiful, incredible, inspiring story. Nothing but amazing things are coming your way. I promise. You are so deeply loved beyond description and you are never alone. I am so proud of you for being brave and being vulnerable with your viewers. I adore you so much.

[@leslieayresrifkind4469]

Honestly. This Niki is my favorite. I’ve been a follower for years but I can see growth in this Niki. I can see you getting back up with things are hard, being real, true, and utterly yourself. It’s the Niki that I can relate to. Life isn’t always perfect and it’s reassuring knowing that. I always wish you the best, to have happiness and bring happiness to others. ❤

[@1.ghostqueen.1]

Society has really messed up our perception. Niki your lips don’t even look small they look perfectly normal and proportional to your face. They’re just not huge crazy injected lips 👄

[@joyeetarozario7907]

She always needs something to complain about

[@jenbyers3840]

All my fave YT's have started to keep it real. It's so beneficial to society to open up about struggles, hiccups, mental health. I am so grateful you are being so brave & showing us & telling us your truth. ❤

[@Marykate2846]

This vlog is honestly so fitting right now. I’ve been married almost 5 years in May and unfortunately I had to ask my husband to leave our home yesterday so I’m feeling super anxious about the future too. I know change can be good and I might one day wake up and ask myself why I didn’t do it sooner but it’s scary rn. I am disabled and my husband has paid for bills and stuff so I’ve been financially dependent on him because I got denied disability the first time and it took a huge hit on my mental health. So now I’m 31, separated, depressed and bipolar and not medicated and just really scared. But it’s comforting when I remember that I’m not the only one feeling like this and going through uncomfortable life situations. Keeping you in my thoughts Niki. ❤

[@haileyfussell]

You got this! Be so proud for standing up for yourself xx

[@cg2859]

you go girl🩷🩷that sort of thing is scary af, good on you for doing whats best for you. i hope you feel proud of yourself because you definitely should💗 sending all the very best wishes and hope everything comes together how you want it to and you get a happy ending xx

[@wishywashy1153]

I few years ago, I only watched Gabbi... then I started watching both... and now I only watch Niki. I don't know why.

[@Missmagazinebura]

Yeah I only watch Niki too

[@wishywashy1153]

@@Missmagazinebura When she mentioned Gabi had a partner, I was like "oh yea, i wonder what she's up to".

[@ioannakaifotis]

Yea me too. I don't watch Gabi now. I don't like sponsors' parade videos.

[@1hcc994]

The reason I stopped is because they’re just ads at this point. Niki has interesting content and the way she puts together videos.

[@kimberlycancelvargas6666]

Is okay to feel sad about a loss and still know it was the right decision. Whe I say a loss I mean the loss of a friendship, city, house, etc. What you are experiencing is a loss, is okay to feel anxious, sad, etc. Let yourself feel those feelings without guilt ❤

[@HealthylivingwithTia]

Niki you are doing absolutely amazing. It takes a lot to be raw and real with people in general but with strangers. You’re so real for that and that’s why I’ve followed you for so long. Keep thriving and doing you girl. You’re killing it. You look absolutely stunning.

[@parkhibaldwa6151]

I luv her cause it shows so much about life. Comfort in knowing you are not the only one

[@aeishabrown]

Change is hard, and it really goes to show how much of an impact it can have on someone. Despite that, I’m glad you’re seeing the positive side to it Niki, and having fun. I’m glad that you became aware of such and have decided to take action on it, rather than waiting until it’s too late. Thank you for being so transparent and real with us. I wish you the best of luck wherever you end up, love you Niki❤

[@cg2859]

keep going niki we love you🩷🩷youre such an inspiration to those of us with adhd because its terrifying to step so far out of your comfort zone and just wing it but youre bossing it girl even if you dont think you are

[@tarynyaki]

Niki, thank you for sharing your raw emotion and being vulnerable. I went through the same thing almost 2 years ago. Had a great job, I Boyfriend, House, everything I needed to settle down. But it just felt like it wasn’t enough or it wasn’t right. So I quit my job, broke up with my boyfriend, picked up and moved to a new state. And that was all during the pandemic, so it was even more isolating. I’m doing all of that at 30, I was heavily criticized. I even went through an imposter syndrome phase. But here I am, two years later happier than I have ever been in my entire life. And I never thought I would get to this point. But you will, too! You’re resilient, smart, driven, caring passionate! You got this girl❤

[@arikas_designs23]

Love these videos Niki!!! Please keep us in the loop on where ever you end up choosing to live! I hope wherever you choose makes you happy!

[@rebeccamcauley4547]

"The deodrant scent tho". Thanks for being honest and transparent about the ups and downs of your life with moving out of your home. I know it was a major decision and one you contemplated on for a while. Delighted that you brought us along to NYFW as I am aware of your love of fashion gowing up watching your channel. I hope that you feel more settled soon. Support always! 🧡🧡

[@graceimurphy]

Thank you for your honesty and as nerve wracking as it all is, I’m excited for you Niki 🖤🖤

[@angieee_hurtado_]

change is hard i got out of 9 year relationship and had to move back home at 34 and im 36 my social anxiety keeps me from keeping relationships and getting out of bed with depression but you motivate proud of you! love ya girly! :) sending good and positive vibes your way!

[@1.ghostqueen.1]

Home isn’t a structure or building it’s where you feel safe just know you have your sister to go to, your parents home, friends and family who are there for you. Not to mention the money and the means to do whatever you’d like in the meanwhile, what a blessing!! I hope you feel better and grateful, I’m trying to move out of the state that I’m in to get away from an abusive ex that’s been stalking and harassing me and don’t have the resources to do so currently. Trying to land a remote job and keep watching my back until I save enough money to be able to make it over 😕 it doesn’t help that I got fired from my last position because of the things I was going through and I’m set back even more after having to replace four slashed tires again and put in camera, all of which I can’t even realistic afford at all and am just stressed about finding work and paying bills but I really need to up and leave before this man kills me 😭

[@rebeccamcauley4547]

Completely agree what a strong and important message ❤🥲

[@haileyfussell]

Bestie that’s so scary. Is there anything any of us can do for you? I’m sorry you’re going through that, we’re all here for you

[@1.ghostqueen.1]

Thank you guys, as it turns out I’m purging almost every thing I have on Mercari trying to gather resources to leave. If anyone is in the market for Coach/Kate Spade bags, accessories and shoes all my items are hashtagged with averyonmercari on there. Sales have been low and slow, praying for some movement.

[@renepare3996]

Is there anything we can do to help?

[@wonderlandvlogs]

Hi Niki. I have to say watching your vlogs makes me smile because it’s nice to hear from you and your anxieties to remind me that I’m not alone about feeling anxious about leaving something behind.

[@edadoxx]

I love how real you get in your vlogs. I just wish I could see you one day and hug you so tightly and tell you how you helped me to gain trust in myself and my decisions. I would literally tell you to not be so hard on yourself. This shit is scary af and I think everyone would feel the same. But only through big transitions and uncomfortable situations we can grow🖤 one day you will look back at this and be so proud for what you’ve gone through. Also, I moved back to my parents home and ngl I felt like a failure for the longest time. But it’s okay because we know these things are temporary. Better days will come ❤

[@sierramorton3201]

Even though I'm going though something very different, I can relate to how ur feeling so much. I'm also going though a big transition period in my life, and even though I'm doing a lot of fun stuff, the future and the unknown gives me so much anxiety too. But,like you said, I know the decisions I made are right for me, and even though this season in uncomfortable, I know its for the better down the line. I hate to see you at a low point. I've been watching for 10+ years and had seen your highs and lows, and you've been so strong in the past I know you'll get though this. And knowing you get get though this is comforting for me and what I'm going through, that I'll make it too. Love you Niki ❤

[@Danielle666LP]

loving the personal content! It makes the real fans see how you’re just like us!! I hope you continue to feel comfortable sharing with us. Thank you ❤️

[@cierracraft2877]

I am living for this content!! Thank you for keeping it real 🫶🏽

[@janellerod4865]

You're gonna figure everything out Niki, we're here for you ❤

[@eveslifestyle9967]

So excited for you! That you always do what's right for you and always keep it real!❤ Been following you and your journey when you started this channel

[@lexeytamayo]

What a cute , connecting vlog for us! I’ve been wanting to leave my hometown and move to a coastal state on the west coast I just feel like I’m gonna miss everyone but I’m not happy where I am. Watching your Vlogs gives me the courage to try

[@itsrainingcantaloupes]

Do it!! As far as we know we only get one life, so you should spend it how you want to. Worse case you can always go back!

[@lexeytamayo]

@@itsrainingcantaloupes true!! The Oregon coast is calling my name 😭

[@its_katiejones]

your vulnerability is so inspiring. sending you positive vibes. 🍀

[@leslie3550]

We all have things we wish were different or that we don't like about ourselves or our lives. But I'd love to just roam NYC during fashion week! Having someone style me, my hair, and my makeup! Traveling is my dream! It's the only thing I have a huge pull inside me to do! But my economics won't allow it! Plus I don't drive!!! 😅 I'd have to backpack with my kitty and I'm not sure he'd love that! Anyway, Niki you are living a life I only dream of! And you will figure it all out because that's how life works girly!! ❤

[@gdlove90]

Niki slays every time

[@ERW94120]

Respectfully Niki it sounds like your codependency issues are still very pervasive and I'd reckon they're holding you back in ways you don't even realize both professionally and personally. You're so talented, smart, and beautiful, but there seems to be this inner block that's keeping you from reaching your full potential, and I'd bet it probably has a lot to do with your struggle to be truly independent.

[@AlexisBelon]

I wonder if she's ever stuck with a good therapist because I feel like this is something they could unpack together. Btw idk if you’re into nyc vlogs but if so, you might like mine! I’d be sooo grateful if you swung by and took a peek. 🙏 Stick around if you like!

[@scorp1ovenus]

Niki I for one don’t judge you for being personal and getting hate. I love seeing your vlogs and getting diary like snippets of ur life! We can vicariously learn things from your experiences and it’s all lovely including fearful times 💝💝🎀🎀✨

[@hollercat606]

I’m so proud of you. You’re going to figure everything out 🤗

[@elenhdrak]

Niki,I’ve been watching you since I was a little kid and I’m so so so happy that we’ve grown together through sooo many changes over the years.Facing anxiety is the worst but it really gets better by having people around you that truly loves and supports you.The changes that you’ve had over the last year,yeah they were tough but everything will work out eventual and every little thing is gonna fall into place.Everything happens for a reason.Love you always Niki❤️

[@shecrockett5923]

i have to say over the last 2 years i have fallen in love with this channel because it became the way it is now this shit is interesting and what i want to be watching

[@homemama1001]

You need to get healthy , and stop everything to find yourself what good is having everything if you are loosing yourself

[@within_here]

There’s so much strength in embracing the uncomfortable and I’m so proud of you Niki!

[@emilyyyy1133]

Niki I am so damn proud of you. I know right now may be a scary/anxious time but you're slaying girl. Change is hard especially when a year ago you thought you'd be with a person your whole life or not. Remember things happen for a reason. One day at a time and I know that's cliche but everything will settle and come together. Just be patient. I'm so happy you have a loving supportive girlfriend to make things better for you

[@blogofmylifeeditionsbycaro6966]

Love you, Niki, stay strong ✨️🙏 I all admire how you are navigating through life to find what really makes you happy. Blessings and success to you and to everyone.

[@rebeccamcauley4547]

Completely agree respect Niki's honesty 👏

[@ariannariveraa]

It truly is so comforting to have you make such vulnerable videos. Goes to show we are not alone! You are going to figure it out and whatever is meant to be, will be. I’m proud of you for taking risks & finding yourself ❤

When you sayed "nothing it's gonna feel confortable for while" it hit me so hard... i moved from brazil to europe recently, but yeah... i feel my anxiety growing with time... so i understand.... Keep being you and real ❤ you have been helping me so hard for this past year, and i cant even explain... lmao... thank you nikki ❤

[@JuliaRoseThorn]

I know it’s hard. I do, but I’m so proud of you for doing it. For following your passions and it’s ok things change that human it’s part of life.

[@studylikenat9751]

Thank you Niki for posting and being such and important part of my life ❤

[@hannekevervaet5222]

I can totally relate on the anxiety surrounding change or even 'great times'. I just bought a house, I'm moving in a week, and my mental health has been really bad. It's okay. We've been through a lot before, and we will come out stronger.

[@RosaZaimee]

I promise you you’re not alone in all of these feelings. We appreciate you being so vulnerable and sharing the raw, authentic emotions that you feel and how you are curating a version of yourself that you’re truly happy with. You make me feel less alone. You got this Niki ❤️

[@elgocollection]

It sounds like you are always welcome at your parent’s house which is lovely.

[@SunShine-ei3ri]

The pink look is everything 👌🏻❤️ I can't look away

[@MenaceDuck]

You're always going to feel anxious, empty, and like nothing is enough when you fill your life with shallow, self-centered, materialistic stuff

[@bribri8042]

I appreciate this Niki. The authentic Niki.

[@HassanRaashid]

The editing is so good in these vlogs omg 😍😍

[@nataliepesick8808]

I relate to this video so much. I got a divorce and had to start my life over at the young age of 27. I’m 31 now and looking back it was the best decision I made for myself.

[@steff162]

You look so good without the filler omggg ❤❤❤

[@mckenziejeanne4508]

As a twin, being born a twin does not mean you are “born codependent”-codependency may have been reinforced various times throughout your life but that has nothing to do with being a twin, moreso maybe how you were RAISED as a twin and what was reinforced. I think it’s good you’re taking some accountability for your codependency but I also think it’s important to not use being a twin as a cop-out. ❤ I say this with love, as a twin who is working on the same issues!

[@rebeccamcauley4547]

Wow, what a beautiful message ❤❤

[@peacelovehappines222]

It’s okay to not know what to do. enjoy not have many attachments cause that will bring freedom. Just know when to bring it in and to have structure it’s all about balance.

[@loisbicknell3775]

You were beautiful with the filler in your lips too, but the no filler in the lips is SLAYING😍

[@meg7221]

It makes me feel better to know other people struggle just as I do. Growing pains are hard so are transitional periods in life

[@rmannayr2129]

NIKI LOOKS GOOD IN PINK!

[@caseycipriano6153]

love you as you and being real. We need more of this on social media!!

[@ambs7093]

The edit of the photoshoot on the bed to being in bed to sleep was SICKKK

[@Chibizu]

Niki, thank you for taking us along your journey! It makes me happy to see your growth and failures and best of all: You are giving a F**K about yourself! Side note: you make a darling cupcake

[@kateinside]

I love your videos so much Niki! A true Inspo and aesthetic of real life things, I thinks that's why you are my fav KZbinr😍

[@Zzzsleepzzz]

Niki keep in mind you are a Taurus and Taurus likes to have steady grounded home is where the heart is type of life. Having the knowledge of your nature is the antidote to your anxiety. Just know that this is temporary and you will be comfortable again someday.

[@justgracie1889]

The real raw you is so pretty niki ❤

[@KRC-es1xi]

Nicki, until you get help with the mania no physical change is going to cure you of it. Manic episodes, depression etc. take time offline and get the help you desperately owe it to yourself.

[@RomneyRanjo]

i love that comment section is so supportive and loving ❤

[@milagrosramos381]

girl life is hard, finding stability will always be up and down and pushing out of the comfort zone is hard but deep down knowing that isn't what feels right, props to you. I made the decision to take my dance career out in LA training professionally trying to network and leaving the environment what you're s use to is a BITCH but don't regret stepping out cause knowing what your gut wants and is telling you, you're on your right path

[@Notsorryjustdolly]

It’s okay to start over. I’m 27 and I’m starting over with three kids. It will be okay what’s meant for you will find you❤️

[@vintagelace7076]

It's ok to not always be ok..change is hard..you just need to adjust with time

[@lizahko9261]

Fantastic editing

[@LoEliza]

I’m sure Niki has her reasons that LA is the right move for now but I can’t help but feel like she would thrive in a cute cozy loft in NYC. Maybe one day!!

[@itskate2991]

The no lip filler is a look! And this hair color ❤ you're looking amazing!

[@elfsworld]

Me: “I wonder she’s gonna upload” Me: *sees a new video*

[@allmonti9861]

I am in a very similar situation. My ex and I were supposed to move back to our hometown in Australia because he got offered a job there. I realised this was not what I wanted so I chose to stay in Canada and am moving to California in October to finally follow what I want. I don't have much certainty in life right now and know that I made the right decision, although I still have those anxious feelings. Thank you for sharing this, it made me feel better❤

[@ZeldasMask]

You defo suit your natural lip that whole outfit near the end in the black dress was next level

[@bethanyp]

Love the day 2 look!

[@foreveradreamer-hq7cu]

Oh Niki, thank you for your honesty. I HAVE TO MOVE OUT of my parents`house everything in me screems for it. I`m not happy at the place I am but I have such a severe anxiety I`m going to fail at living my own life.

[@Fundi333]

Change is always hard Niki but it will be worth it in the end. Promise ♥️✨👁️

[@anitasurujbally9216]

The most real video on the internet 🙌🏻🔥

[@emb2057]

I mean what do you expect living out of suitcases lol ur never going to stop healing and growing it’s just part of life. Maybe just take a break from social media all together and not force things bc u feel the pressure. It seems exhausting doing something just bc you feel like you have to not bc u truly want to!

[@Ashluv085]

First of niki you look GORGEOUS. You may be going through a tough time but sis you're glowing. I feel like once you move in to yourr new place and get settled it's going to be OVER. You're really coming into your own. I'm over here trying to figure out what that looks like for me. And I love how real and open you are with your Vlogs because like you said it's a documentary and you are going to be able to look back and see the different stages you went through and really find a new appreciation for life and yourself. And me watching you since 00 remake girls chile have seen you through it all. I'm so happy to see you grow into yourself. And sometimes you gotta be a Lil uncomfortable to get comfortable in life. It will get better!!!!

[@aviiletters]

Niki, I feel the same fucking way. I am going through it in life right now but watching you is helping me and I thank you so much for being open and honest with your feelings, it's helping me being open and honest with mine.

[@szofim985]

Nikiiii your natural lips are so beautiful they completely align with your facial structure 💕💕 keep them!!

[@rmannayr2129]

LOL NIKI JUMPING ON THE BED!

[@kaylenej]

I appreciate every raw, personal moment you post on social media, Niki. l am also a taurus and though i am a few years younger (beginning my 20s), I have noticed parallels between our lives. When I start putting myself down and feeling hopeless, I watch your content as a reminder that i'm not alone in my problems. i am valid in my emotions/problems and will get through this. Your honesty and realness helps me be my most authentic self even when it's scary or i feel critized. I relate to you and i am so thankful for every moment of your life you share with us. whether it's the good, bad, or hard parts, I am a viewer that stands by you in all of it. life is hard and you are doing the best you can. thank you for being you, Niki🖤

[@Madison-kk9ze]

You look amazing. I love your new video style editing !!!! ❤❤

[@carlatinaschannel]

I’m in the process - of saving to move too it’s scary hey but I think that’s a good thing

[@haileyfussell]

Niki I say this from bestie who’s been watching you since the beginning to bestie here. Have you tried therapy? Like I’m coming from such a genuine place I really think you should find someone closer to your age so they get it who works with codependency, anxiety etc. I work for a therapists office and think you’d benefit from it so much! Remember health is half the mental and consider it a habit so you commit to it!

[@theotherway1639]

The hardest times push us to grow beyond our imagination, but it takes time and we just need to hold on. Mindfulness helps. I like the workbook called 30 Days to Reduce Anxiety by Harper Daniels, and meditating a lot.

[@lexm2884]

niki you are gorgeous and your natural lip look so good !!!

[@fleurgeneration]

which one is it? are you moving to LA again or staying in pennsylvania?

[@puddlesiren]

I feel like New York City is more Niki than LA is

[@Sarahlovely88]

it's so nice ur bed is right next to the window. that's nice 😊

[@Julia-g5g1k]

opening new eras girl it might be difficult but so healing