reacting to my breakdown | 4 YEARS ON

[@hxpnxs]

I remember this was a crazy time, I was so worried about you 😭💔 but it's honestly incredible to see you now. I'm still in a bad place rn, so you making videos is a super nice surprise, thank u 💗

[@elizabridget1971]

It’s so sad to learn that you’ve passed. I haven’t watched your videos in a while but something gave me the urge to visit your channel today. Through some of your darkest times, you posted your thoughts and feelings here, yet when you decided to end it all there was no warning. I am so sorry that the system failed you. You tried your hardest to get help but kept getting shut down. Thank you for helping me through some of my darkest days. You have helped so many people ❤

[@cerysmere1]

rest in peace gorgeous , you're so missed

[@asez4494]

Hi Marie!! Just wanted to say that when I started watching your videos two years ago I was in a really dark place (bad environment, mental health on the fritz) and seeing your journey and your incredible strength when dealing with mental health helped me get through so much. I'm in a much better place now and just wanted to say your vids made me feel less alone. Lots of love and thank you for being open about your mental health journey throughout the years ❤ Keep slayin babes!! xoxo

[@xheyitsjessx9313]

I know you may cringe at your old videos now but i’m so grateful for them all. you really helped me feel less alone when i was a young teen and i’m forever grateful for that. i’m so happy your doing better now ♥️

[@sammah-lammah527]

Earth lost a fighter but heaven gained an angel 🥺💔❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@t.n.h.ptheneohumanpatterna8334]

Heaven isn’t real grow up

[@ChristmasTreeFarm73]

@@t.n.h.ptheneohumanpatterna8334 I also personally don't believe in heaven but this is a disgusting thing to comment on a tragic statement like this. Take a long hard look at yourself

[@nicolemillar6822]

I’ve got NO clue how or why I started following you, I’m a 34 year old Australian. You have given me so much insight into mental illness and helped me understand so much more, have empathy for people. And wow I am so so proud of the woman you are and are becoming. I hope you remember this on your hard days. I’m studying psychology and counselling at the moment. And people like you helped guide that journey. I can’t wait to see you grow Marie. You’re a special soul

[@nithyaasree]

😢

[@nithyaasree]

But,she committed suicide last year

[@nicolemillar6822]

@@nithyaasree that’s terribly sad to hear. I had no idea 😢 mental health is a deep dark place for some people and the pain is too much. I hope she is resting easy now

[@Sophie-fx3tq]

this video meant so much to me when i was going through a breakdown. love you forever mariie, and so happy to see a youtube post from you

[@TheMarkedGirl717]

Glad to see you back and so happy you survived this crazy time 😭 The growth of being able to laugh at some of these psychotic delusions now - I could tell you had a lot of shame and guilt surrounding it for a long time.

[@emilyovereem9974]

i remember watching this and i was so worried for you, i can not believe it was 4 years ago!!!!!! that means i've been watching your videos for like 7 years wtf. you have no idea how happy i am to see you in such a good place now. supporting you forever & always xxx

[@abi5158]

4 years no way? i remember watching the original video, so glad to see you doing better now ❤

[@curtisbemis6640]

You were one of fhe most amazing people i have ever met . Love you giel. See you soon . Heaven awaits vounting rhe dsys unril i can see you again

[@tracychalmers478]

I remember watching this 😭 you've done so well hun,mega proud of you ❤thank you for also raising awareness to a condition that is rarely talked about your a little star that has helped me so much in my battles with bpd xxx

[@lizziec4therine]

I remember this time, I’m so happy you’re doing well now ❤️ the editing did make me laugh though 😂

[@LIZZYBANKSS]

I remember this & how dissociated you where jumping from one thing to another in a conversation, I’m currently like this too 😂 so glad to see you better

[@nataliemitchell6148]

I’m so glad your doing much better now!❤️ i would love to hear some stories as long as your Oka with sharing them, I’m so happy to see you thriving ❤much love to you!

[@sparkleofskies]

I fucking love you, Marie! I laughed along with you whilst rewatching - when you were singing the Jonas Brothers but there was a video of you crying behind it 😂😂😂😂

[@sparkleofskies]

but seriously, I am so glad you're doing better ❤ I remember watching these when you uploaded & my heart went out to you.

[@sparkleofskies]

I was also the person on tik tok who mentioned the psychotic moon on your wall! I'm glad I wasn't imagining it - should be so proud of how far you've come xxxx

[@55tranquility]

Love your videos you are an inspiration! I’m much older, had a breakdown in 2021 and been on the recovery journey since. Your videos really helped me, I had no previous experience of mental illness or mental health services prior to this, your videos have been a help. I’m doing way better now and have made so many changes in my life that obviously were much needed! Like you an important thing I’ve learnt is I still have days and probably continue to - but thats OK they are not the end of the world - they always pass if we let them its when I declare disaster just because of how I’m feeling that’s actually 90% of the problem. I actually have a whole new career now in mental health as I found helping others who are struggling really helpful and have me a whole new direction in life. I now am happy that I may need to be on meds forever and I’m OK with that or at some stage maybe I will feel like its time to not be - but there was a time when i just wanted to not be on meds and just go back to my old life, again this was the problem in itself. Its taking life as it comes and not having ideas of how things should be - i think mostly it comes down to self acceptance which is something I have learnt. Keep on with you recovery and life , you are amazing!

[@jamienevill1768]

Actually, this reminds me of a couple of years ago when I looked through my old journals that I'd kept since I was 18 years old. They were intended for my best friend to read, but she told me to destroy them as she was unlikely to read them before her cancer took hold. I'm glad I did destroy them as the contents were a horrible reflection of my mental health. Sadly, she did pass away, but I'm glad she didn't read all that 'stuff' that my head came up with! Take care ☺ 💜

[@chloex1550]

I remember watching that when it was uploaded so great to see how far you have come! Would love the story times xx

[@JN.S.M]

I just love how you show compassion to your past self. I remember watching your video and being in a similar headspace but somehow you just made me feel less alone? Looking back at it now, I'm so sorry you were going through a shit time and it makes me sad that at the time I didn't recognize it as that probably because I was also not doing well. I hope you know how proud and hopeful it makes me seeing how beautifully you've grown. I still always remember you said in one of your videos "Listen to your wisdom" and I repeat it to myself when I'm struggling. Love you Marie xx

[@faithmcevoy4218]

always always so proud of you gal!! watching your growth over the last 4 years is insane, youre glowing

[@Neitha98]

Love from France, I wish I was also in a better state I started watching your video before I was diagnosed with Bpd and bipolar disorder and somehow I felt even more connect, you where are rough in front of so many eyes and takes so much courage. You can be proud of you 💜🇫🇷

[@anniebootboot]

The dissociation bit was too real . Also the going out bit and splitting and saying “but that wasn’t me”

[@brooklynpatterson1602]

Love you boo 🥰😘 the growth you've shown is truly incredible! Would love to see some storytimes!!!

[@sarahfuller8542]

This upload has made me happy 😊. The contrast between you then and now is vast. It's great you see you in such a good place now ❤. Also, because of you, I gave myself permission to fall apart and more importantly get help, and that is something I was trying so hard for so long not to do, hoping things would eventually get better on their own. So thank you for giving me the courage ❤

[@eliserichardson1990]

I also was erratic and had crazy delusions when in psychosis, didn't eat either. It's good to see you doing better as i'm still not well 1,5 years after the last episode. Seing a private psychiatrist now so hoping this will work. Love your videos x

[@elliexx2844]

Rip angel 💔x

[@MrsDogLover]

Oh no, this was my first notice that she has passed. I don't want to make any assumptions, what happened?

[@breephoenix111]

​@MrsDogLover she took her life

[@gracieeeee2772]

it gives me so much hope to see how far you have come, and makes me feel like there is hope for my future. If you wouldn't mind, would you be able to talk about your job? i only have gcses and i was just wondering how you got into your job and what its like

[@chloehitchcock7508]

I remember the video like that I used to do I watched so many and it made me get upset because I go threw anixiety and it’s not fun at all, but it’s nice to see u happier now 💕

[@lornatw]

Question: regarding scars do you keep them covered in mh care environments or around children atall? Are there some environments that you decide to do this? Thanks for another upload looking forward to it and much love to you ❤

[@klaradvorak2633]

I remember this! It was concerning and I was worried for you but “I’m crying into me dogs ear” will never fail to make me laugh

[@fishfingers8441]

Tesco story times are a must 😭😭

[@casonjamesshelton7390]

i love you so much! you saved me!!!

[@stayupallnight]

Still not over the painting yourself white 😭🤣

[@fanornot]

I love your videos because you give me so much hope, because you have been better, you have a job and it gives me hope like there is an happier future waiting for me too❤❤❤❤❤❤love u❤❤❤❤

[@otrinolaringolog]

🍓🌞🌞🌞🥳🥳😆👻 so glad and happy to watch you again Mari

[@vezzamoxon]

What extensions do you use? Also love your videos

[@charlotterosex]

Strange I was just binge watching your old vids and then saw this one pop up LOL 🥰

[@jadebutler1495]

I want more stories !! X

[@maya-of8sk]

thank you. there is nothing more to say.

[@jasminelee1234]

I’d like to hear of your stories ❤

[@EveWheeler-rx2dd]

The strongest 🥺🥺💖

[@Tamariasmr]

Been watching you for so long ❤

[@eliserichardson1990]

And no you're not annoying you're going through A LOT!

[@stacyhunter2710]

Good to see you pretty lady!

[@kiaradorey9982]

Hey ik u feel so distant from little you but she’s still you. And all I hear is you putting her down as if you are so ashamed and disgusted. I think she deserves more kindness, acceptance and sensitivity ❤️

[@zoesagittarius2675]

That’s a lovely comment but unfortunately Marie passed away last year 💔

[@JakeWebber-johnnieguilbert]

She’s dead she can’t see this

[@ELLIEPERIODBITCH]

@@JakeWebber-johnnieguilberthow did she die

[@missbecca5667]

Who is sheeeee. Thankyou for sharing 💜

[@ABenson-rq3tj]

Hope this is ok to ask how did u feel watching your past self xx

[@jukio02]

Happy that you are cured.

[@zoieexo]

If only 😢

[@gabriellamanley9779]

She unfortunately did end up passing away last year.

[@keekeedy1195]

Stories plz

[@Crocs4cats]

Anyone know what happened to Albie?

[@zoesagittarius2675]

He’s with Dylan

[@stacyhunter2710]

I'm off my meds, can't afford them. Fucking pissed they always say DO THIS it isn't easy st all EVER

[@stacyhunter2710]

Just venting. Done now. Good luck to everyone else. We are all doomed

[@pfftxoxo1502]

The racism part wasn’t needed

[@weronika7158]

im so happy when you upload❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹