Chatting about Hookup Culture

[@zattart]

Never worry about the time; longer the video the better! Haven’t gotten “tired of you” in the 10 or so years I’ve watched you, Mark! YOU made me feel like being gay was ok. Thank you ❤

[@henryal1953]

Kevin's points of view are awesome - well argued, eloquently put, straightforward right, perfectly ready to be scribbled down and learned by heart. Thanks to both of you!

[@EbonyRichardson16]

HEY FEMALE VIEWER HERE !! Don’t forget us .. been here for a good min gotta support a fellow Hoosier !

[@zonegreat5273]

"shame is who you are and guilt is what you did" I love this. Sounds like a therapist talking

[@christopherjames4839]

Hookups genuinely make me feel gross bc my goal is to find a life partner and not just using someone to get off and that makes me feel shameful

[@TheeWandaStan]

@Robert-bg7bl yet here you are watching them, heathen 💀💀

[@rogeveyrut1991]

Well people have different goals and it's ok

[@VergeXT]

​@rogeveyrut1991 Yea but why is it every time someone says they are not into hookup culture someone has to come and be defensive and say its okay for some people? No one said it isn't. I am not into hookup culture and my roommate is and he constantly asks me why I don't and then says something about how he is not slut. No one ia calling you guys anything bad, I get a lot more hate for not participating than for doing it.

[@jgabis2008]

Congratulations.

[@joejojoestar]

also side note - i think no matter what people are looking for, i think the general consensus is that just being able to talk about queer love & things around it shouldn't be seen as a taboo subject or super controversial like we're just animals at the end of the day

[@strickland1997]

Thoroughly enjoyed listening. Kevin hit the head on the nail. I grew up feeling the same way about praying to sleep at night and thinking that was your only sin. Very nice to hear someone else say! Great talk!

[@azayzelderegis1655]

How the hell do men hookup with Mark and not want to date him? He's literally so cute

[@scottsaunders5087]

Great conversation you can definitely tell Mark sensors himself! Been following you for more years than I want to admit! Anyway peace and have a great week x

[@markanthonyboyd372]

I love the unedited and raw realness of this episode. I definitely understand your perspective of censorship with your audience. I’m branching out on social media and realized I’m gonna have to keep the jokes on a sympathy minimum

[@jcskidd]

Self discovery is great. Keep it up. 99.9% of KZbinrs are different online then they are in real life. Unfortunately with the KZbin model creators are forced to play to their audience instead of publishing what they want or fully being genuine and themselves. Keep up the hardwork. You’re doing great!

[@J0HN_D03]

6:55 All Europeans didn't grow up with things like that neither... European countries are very different culturally.

[@kristiandelacruz8148]

This. Is. Amazing! Please make this to a podcast. It's so great hearing both of your POV and experiences. It's so awesome!

[@JJ-dn8rb]

I watched the first half of the 1st episode for Naked Attraction. The confidence they have, the respectful attitude and even the one picking from a line up presenting themselves too was impressive and refreshing. America culturally responds to the naked body so differently. This is nice to learn from. Thank you.

[@williamm.9766]

I really enjoy these types of conversations Mark. I don't have any queer friends so it can be challenging to talk about these subjects with my straight guy friends or girlfriends bc they don't quite understand it. I haven't hooked up with anyone since my last breakup and I feel shameful if I ever get the urge to. I personally attribute it to me craving more of a connection with someone rather than just carnal pleasures. Finding meaningful people to talk over coffee with is hard to find these days...

[@danielecassanelli5959]

Honestly, congratulations! This is actually deep content compared to what I am usually exposed from American creators. It's really interesting such a critical thinking on society 👏

[@lotustris]

This was such a light hearted and fun watch, with moments of tenderness. Had me laughing out loud at points, and getting a touch teary when Mark was getting emotional. It resonated with me even more because I literally just came back from a booty call 😂😂🎇🎇🎉

[@DADDYART1]

At 63 I am my own gay role model. When I was young, we had no one.

[@tommoncrieff1154]

Yes. I’m 64.

[@theelaveaux]

Ohhh that line about "I used to think being gay was my only crime and I ignored all the other aspects of my life where I needed to grow" never thought of it but growing up SAME

[@Sameon94]

Mark has always seemed one of the most human yt out there, and videos this like just make him seem more relatable and gay, which i absolutely love. Appreciate the honesty.

[@JMChatman]

I used to feel the same way. I would shake before, and have crushing guilt. I would just have to let it pass. When I first did it with my current partner for the first time, the guilt started to hit. It was their first time, but when I saw how I guilt was affecting them, it kind of just broke me. And I’ve never felt it after that. I think I became more like Kevin. Me feeling that way, was negatively affecting others around me. People in the community I tried to be a part of. And I had never felt it since. It took me seeing that my guilt was affecting people I cared about to realize I had to move past it.

[@LucienWhite-fb5qk]

that's actually really interesting and I'd love to here more about that process, I feel I could learn from it

[@MrJackKnightSays]

Hi Mark, great video as usual. As an asexual man, I feel weird about sending nudes to people. I have tried having accounts where I share pics of myself, mostly post workout selfies and stuff like that, and I loved sharing them and getting compliments, but when requests for pics of a certain nature came in, I had to leave. Honestly, if someone says "No" to your request to see stuff, don't push them. I had it happen to me, and that shit's not good dudes.

[@robertfaison3977]

I used to say the same prayer growing up and as a young adult, "God make me straight." I eventually learned that God loves me just the way God created me, a black gay man who loves God and loves men.

[@yaidesantiagogarcia7085]

I think there's a lot of gay men who aspire to have traditional lives i.e marriage & kids, and I do feel like we're often viewed within the community as prudes, and shamed for being "hetero-normative." We're kind of spearheaded into feeling like we're lagging in our self-exploration of queer identity, and holding our sexuality's hostage by gay men who don't desire the same things as we do. In that regard, some of us only have hetero-normative conditioning to teach us how to obtain certain life goals, as there are very few gay people who have attained long lasting marriages and have raised children. I think we should all kind of remember that we're the first few generations that get to do the damn thing, and try to understand each other bc no gay man can without a doubt tell another gay men what lies ahead.

[@mikedemarchelier9090]

“how you live your life is your business. Our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. And before you know it your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it!” -André Aciman- Call me by your name”.

[@oliveryazzie1110]

Thank you both for sharing a great conversation. I appreciate every second of this video. I’m still coming onto my sexuality and still try to identify it.

[@joeyhernandez5779]

This one of favorite videos ! Fell off a few years ago now and I’m back recently. I like this darker side and discussion of topics like this openly and bantering back and before. hookups are fun I don’t really feel any guilt (after therapy) but I take breaks or still date. Life is too short to not try other men :)

[@jamesmcarthur6945]

Please do more of these. Mark you are very humble and down to earth. You give us gays a great name! I enjoy these deep conversations as I tend to be philosophical with past problems as well. Lots of love brother ❤

[@nicob2063]

Legit, I just started talking to my therapist about how I avoid hooking up because it makes me feel like I did something wrong... I also grew up in the midwest (Cincy/NKY) and it is def related to my parents and how I grew up!

[@Shannie92]

Don’t know you. But I’m in the same area and feel the exact same way!

[@thedavidjwschmidt]

A very interesting discussion... thanks. My idea of body privacy is very similar to yours Mark. This is really good, guys!

[@GregRBaird]

As an LGBTQIA+ content creator and a global speaker on LGBTQIA+ civil rights, diversity, equity, Inclusion & belonging this was a great post and very interesting. I understand many things you are sharing and chatting about. Thank you .

[@alastairtheduke]

"I'm not going to let anyone shame me, least of all myself" Oooooof!

[@SebastienFortin07]

Another amazing episode. Thank you so much for your authenticity and transparency, guys. I can't wait for the next one. Love you guys! Don't be straight!

[@kevintnorman]

I hope you guys like our latest couch conversation 🥰

[@jovanecarvajal]

Love your thought process, and would love to see you post your own KZbin videos!

[@DAPortalatin]

I identify with this 100% Mark/feel the exact same way. This ideology has made me super introverted for a large part of my life and has added so much anxiety. To the point that, I would never even admit that I was gay or talk about who I was truly attracted at past jobs and social settings. I've come a long way but definitely still struggle with this feeling and being terrified of dating in general. Really was nice to hear Kevin say that...really needed to hear that! This was such an awesome conversation again guys! Love ya and thanks for talking about this subject!👌😀💞

[@J0HN_D03]

3:03 "La CROOOOOOAAAAAA" !!!! Like "CROIssant".

[@dannyjladd]

"Is Owen Wilson going to take his shirt off too?" "Send me your reading socks." LOL.

[@Jeffh206]

This was a great conversation and I’m definitely the same way when it comes to being reserved and photos. I will not send photos and I prefer not to receive photos.. once I get to know you if I like you then great then we’ll see you at that time..lol. I think it’s just an interesting that we have this culture needing to send new photos before we get to know. This was a great topic and looking forward to listening to more in the. Thanks Mark! ❤

[@alastairtheduke]

We all censor ourselves depending on context: job interview, doctor office, gay bar, on camera

[@Jaksattacks]

This Video means so much to me, Thank you.

[@Stewie667]

Loved the energy in this video! Kev is such a vibe ! And Mark is so handsome as always 😅 😮‍💨 What a beautiful friendship !

[@davidc8694]

I've done the fake name bit, but I'm so much happier exercising radical honesty. If I'm not comfortable answering a question, I'll say as much in a kind way.

[@toms5996]

Kevin gets inspired to sell his 'used books'😆 Loved the pod episode/conversation...could relate to Mark quite a bit.

[@GrotrianSeiler]

Shame is a very powerful emotion. It gets in the way of everything. Best to talk about it with those who care about you.

[@chrislillytv]

This video made me want to be interviewed on their podcast. Could be really healing

[@TheVonnieVonVonShow]

That ending was so emotional & heartfelt ☺️

[@josephgarner94]

I’ve had people ask for my used briefs and I’m a way smaller KZbinr than Mark so I’m sure he gets it all the time 😅. In regard to having an online persona, I think you can censor what you post online and still be authentic with your content. Idk maybe this example makes sense, I once worked as a personal banker and my work persona was more professional but I still felt like I was myself at work.

[@MrJackKnightSays]

You've had people ask for your used underwear? OMFG, that's effed up.

[@marcusa1850]

Thanks for an interesting conversation, Mark. I've been following you for about 10 years, btw 😂

[@ady8097]

Loved loved loved this. The chemistry and energy between you both is palpable. More please. ❤

[@soccer7674]

It's Funny Mark Miller mentions anything to do with nudes the gay internet goes crazy, I had two friends I haven't heard from in a while message me to watch this lol, just shows the pull this man has on the world.

[@nikkilogan7726]

Beautiful interview from 2 beautiful gay men. Love you guys! 😎💖🏳‍🌈

[@chateau7]

Well, Mark, what about those used peanut-butter jars?!?! That could be an untapped source of ongoing revenue: shipping not included. 🥜🥜🥜🥜 (Smirk + Wink = Smink.)

[@KeyBladeChaserVen]

Tangents make podcasts even better honestly

[@iPhonePhan]

Great episode serving realness & humor. ❤ it !

[@jackfordon7735]

One of the most nefarious things about our sexphobic society in the U.S. is that important topics that we should be discussing become of a source of shame or embarrassment. One of the most sick examples of this in my opinion is circumcision. Apparently it's completely okay for some doctors to decide to amputate part of your junk when you're a baby, but if you question why your body was modified without your consent, prepare yourself to be treated like a weirdo. Also, the fact that nudity is pretty taboo means that very few Americans (especially straight men and women) are familiar with what an intact penis looks like. And thus the cycle continues...

[@mikedemarchelier9090]

Doctors will make recommendations when asked, but ultimately the decision is made by the parents. Most American men are cut so they naturally prefer to have their sons also circumcised. However I think it’s great now that the boy is left to decide for himself whether he wants to get circumcised or not once he reaches the age of maturity

[@trav5850]

I feel like at the end Mark wanted to say "and don't be afraid to be yourself" ❤

[@Josemiranda36988]

I always wonder why anyone would leave Mark. Now I think I know why.

[@riccardomaffei6264]

?

[@heliosld]

Much like you Mark, I struggle with the same thing. Church kid with a lot of moral conditioning... 32 and happy now though!

[@Cat-daddy1234]

Hey mark, agree with your stance of keeping that side private. I don’t think it’s always a correlation with being “ashamed” of being gay. Nothing wrong with being conservative. Much love

[@adamherrmann3456]

Great conversation! The internet needs more of this!

[@cmaricha22]

Make a podcast. Love the banter and enjoy you both!!!

[@swscratch]

Just an observation…you two bring out such goodness from each other. I really enjoy listening to you two banter. A few zingers in this episode…

[@TheMikester307]

Queer and proud myself! Thanks guys! -----Mickey

[@edwarkedward]

I super love this episode!!! 🥺Really like you and Kevin talking like this!

[@christophergonzalez1893]

As gay men, especially gays of the late/early 90’s we didn’t have the same experiences of heterosexual exploration. It’s not like there’s a lot of open gay men to really have experiences with in school. So of course all that pent up suppressed desire needs to be addressed before you can find your life partner. You need to live and learn before you can say you know what you really want and need. I think gay culture is still growing with each generation as it wasn’t to long ago that it was shunned and shamed.

[@belizeguy]

So, I for one love the Longer Videos. Thanks Mark and Kevin, or what ever e is calling himself tonight! Awesome. I have a friend that gets invited to all these parties that he does not want to go to, and he pays a few guys that look kind of like him to go to the parties and say that they are him, producing the invitations. All he asks is that they get Photographed, use his name, and they get paid to be him for the night.

[@roland4417]

kevin: a gay man from the beggining marke: a gay man who realised later on

[@Alan.Endicott]

When you are your content it's not uncommon to become microscopically introspective. None of us leads a life so interesting that others want to see it all, and curating our lives requires manufacturing things to make them watchable, which ultimately feels inauthentic. I could be wrong, but I think there's truth in it.

[@enzonisacgonzalez824]

yeah i always make a new personality when i go out. never seeing those people again.

[@cm2883]

The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World is an influential[1] book by clinical psychologist Alan Downs. Published in 2005, the book explores the challenges faced by gay men as they navigate societal expectations, discrimination, and internalized shame.

[@travelwithdrew21]

Y’all should do a Q and A episode and start conversations off of questions

[@markbringelson4119]

What a great Session - feels very honest. Honesty from both of you.

[@OLDS98]

Thank you for the video. Some interesting thoughts were mentioned. It makes you think and it also is good to see and gay men discussing the issues and just know it will impact someone.

[@13rix29]

Love you mark from the PH!

[@OuchMyNardz]

Ok ok ok, I said "those LaCroix are definitely flat" last chat episode because it was the first long video. 😂

[@dylanmarkmurphy]

I just know I’m gonna eat this tf up, so real

[@TurnoftheDrew]

Great video Mark! However, on Colleen Ballinger (Miranda Sings) the person she sent underwear to did several videos about their close friendship with Colleen. It's a lot to unpack, however, she did send them knowingly to a child. She even knew the then child's mother. Anyway, not to derail from the video. Just letting you know and others know what Colleen did. She admitted to this and lied, anyhow, thank you for yet again, another great video.

[@TurnoftheDrew]

The youtuber who shared their own experience with Colleen is Adam McIntyre.

[@oscarquiming2457]

Maybe someday you mark can talk abt ur deep seated feelings abt ur ex and ur failed relationship.. just a suggestion..

[@StewardPidd]

Look at the works of Tony Sansone. His nude photography elevates the human form and is devoid of shame. Men such as yourselves should be proud of the care and form of your body. Obtain fine photos of yourself, if only for private enjoyment and healthy pride.

[@wuilmarksalcedo2018]

Great video, but I don't understand why you will feel bad after a hookup, if you're single, enjoyed but if you're in a committed relationship then you should feel guilty.

[@EvWuzhere]

No joke, beat for beat i have the exact same wedding crashers in theater story w my dad. Also come to lake tahoe yall

[@scott1747]

I thought only lesbians could have cats. Loved the chat ❤

[@ashowboat]

Both of you are wonderful!!!

[@rallimb486]

i love a sh’medium’ish length podcast. let’s do this more ❤

[@davidmcclellan9959]

MARK YOUR MAKING ME LAUGHING I FEEL BETTER YAY LOVE DAVID😀🥰😀🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@alexstaf5824]

Love you MarkE❤

[@justinrousse9611]

The two lamps on the side tables are too small. I would go with larger lamps.

[@pete84101]

The one on the left, if taller, would interfere with the light switch. But a mid-century modern style would work.

[@Miko80]

You definitely need make it regular. I love the energy.

[@codyryanlewis]

becoming a patreon member. :P

[@jonathanvega4777]

I may or may not have sold a pair of socks 😅😅

[@carlosravenwoodblackcloud4272]

Hello Mark. Love your videos ❤. From Oregon.

[@MatijaMedved]

love all the stories for Croatia

[@calvind2054]

Yeah Mark. I’ve noticed your friend throws you off kilter quite a bit. And rightly so…. Leaving it there.

[@Jeff-qx8fr]

Love this content! Great content and y’all should make a podcast together

[@BrooksBray]

Oh God I have that same feeling, like I did something wrong if I have a hook up. I have such hangups, and I'm afraid to get a disease too lol.

[@lullabygoodbye25]

6:20 - completely wrong sight on Croatian or general European view on nudity, those are all mostly tourists that feel free outside their own culture and shamelessly release their inner self. It's still pretty taboo down here.

[@delibakerytravel]

It's Sad That Many Thinks It's Dirty?? Have You Been To A Museum??

[@jankleynhans5783]

Love you Mark. Please come visit us in Australia

[@blueangelboy96]

I love Mark's pants 😊

[@sho942000]

NGL, I'd have sold the boxers and done the photos in the blink of an eye. I can't say no to that kind of money

[@jordyliterario]

Is this podcast on Spotify?