Telling a Child They're Dying | New Amsterdam | MD TV

When a young girl's cancer aggressively returns, her parents face the horrendous task of telling her she's dying.
From New Amsterdam Season 1 Episode 4 'Boundaries' - Max creates chaos when he volunteers New Amsterdam to take over for a short-staffed neighbouring hospital. Frome has a crisis of conscience about the funding for a hospital garden. An eager resident learns a secret about Bloom.
New Amsterdam (2018) After becoming the medical director of one of the United States's oldest public hospitals, Dr Max Goodwin sets out to reform the institution's neglected and outdated facilities to treat the patients.
Watch all seasons of New Amsterdam: www.justwatch....
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[@robertbragg9364]

It's sad to think this is happening all over the world for all different reasons. It breaks my heart to think of anyone losing a child. Nothing can even begin to heal that type of pain.

[@kasiafoksinska2143]

no parent should have to bury their child

[@donaldreason5664]

B.REASON Jesus can ... These little ones go straight to heaven at their last breath and Jesus in all his glory welcome them home with great joy... They recognize him even if no one ever taught them and they run to him overjoyed to jump in his arms as he walks them through the gates of HEAVEN... What a day that will be when my Jesus I will see...and I look upon his face.. The one who saved me by his grace.. When he takes me by the hand and leads me through the promised land... What a day.. Glorious day... That will be.. 🙏

[@sandracrossland5118]

Makes me so sad 😭 This what cancer does to our loved one 😭

[@burimfazliu3102]

What’s worse is that it’s curable but companies make more money treating the disease than curing it.

[@poodoodoodoo]

I played the father on this episode. Wow, I shot this scene a few years ago. Still have a hard time watching it but seeing all of these reactions shows how impactful the subject matter can be. Thanks for watching.❤

[@Monisajda]

You played it very well ❤

[@poodoodoodoo]

@Monica Falcon Thank you!

[@shdox_]

You were great in this. Amazing work.

[@Sprinkles_444]

You did amazing tho !!! 👏👏👏👏

[@DocBree13]

You did a phenomenal job! ❤

[@mikealalee2889]

When my child asks me what dying is like I will tell him. "Dying is like coming home, to a place youv missed for a very long time"

[@debbies6494]

She was great in the way she explained it! Such a caring doctor❤

[@betterthingstodo492]

CANCER SUCKS! It's bad enough when you're an adult and have to tell your children; but when your children have cancer, it's the most heartbreaking thing in the world.😪 💛💛💛

[@arinak.3627]

My mum was the one who had to tell my grandmother she was dying. The doctor couldn't tell her due to language barrier. My mum was distraught to find out that none of the treatments were working and that her mother was dying. And then she was the one who had to tell her own mother that she was dying. My mum told me the doctor was consoling her as she was trying to compose herself to tell my grandmother. Also imagine your daughter being the one to tell you that you're dying from cancer.

[@Hannah-tb1vm]

She explained it in such a beautiful way ❤❤❤😢😢

[@Whitneypyant]

Poor little girl. Millions of kids goes through this and it terrible.

[@honeybee2587]

Her insight is amazing. But this is how a child sees things. They only know black and white no gray area or middle ground. Children see and know things better then most adults do. The innocence and insight of a child is beyond precious. She knows something is wrong. She knows she is going to die. She knows her parents cannot go with her. But her bravery is endless. No one should ever have to suffer from or die of cancer. But we live in a rotten and broken world. Life is so precious we must always remember that.

[@slane_design]

we need to end the stigma and taboo around death. It's a part of being human. The Dr's answer to her question was very beautifully explained.

[@greenbeantm1096]

Damn I don’t think I’ve ever cried at a clip of a show before, that “mommy can you hear me” got me though

[@greenbeantm1096]

I think the parents needed that explanation too

[@doryfrye]

OMG this was so touching

[@ninjakittycat6888]

Water works for me. This hits home for me 😢

[@LynnHowell-n6u]

this is to familiar for me,i lost a child, Alan, he & his gf had been arguing & he left angry that night at about 2 in the morning, he was speeding, he hit a ditch that forced his car into a tree, up on it's nose, like the car was a hotdog bun literally, it partially decapitated Alan, they brought him back 4 times but with every push on his chest the more blood that came from his head, there was no getting that baby back, he was 22, sober as a judge which shocked us bc my son had alcohol & drug problems, sober as a judge, made it even sadder to me, we didn't know it but he had a policy & since his accident was a sober one which was the only stipulation in his contract he was able to leave his sister $53,000, so proud of that boy my boy, our boy, she was quite eager to learn what that may be like, equally as hard to answer her, goodness, no way really to explain it to her without frightening her, does she have a right to know to prepare? for me absolutely, i think it would be cruel to misguide her, i would want to know if everything had been done that could have, i don't know that anyone could sit down to this conversation easily at all, just gut wrenching, her dreams nothing will come true, my heart is broken after this, just my God❤

[@Zionbahzard]

Guess I'm a monster for thinking that I'd of said it will be the same as it was before you were born.

[@samg873]

That might make it worse

[@Zionbahzard]

@@samg873 Well I believe honesty with the young is better as shielding them from inevitabilities only stunts them.

[@itsjustvin7630]

@@Zionbahzard depends what's considered honesty

[@foolslayer9416]

I swear I've seen the guy who played the dad in something else. I think it was in one of the Star Trek films.

[@sjfrench8034]

You're close, his name is Shawn Andrew and he was in The Orville

[@Smileythesilent]

Oh that's very well done...

[@DefileOdds]

My younger brothers last words were, mama I'm not ready to die yet.

[@shroudsshadow9998]

when she said mommy?, can u hear me? 😭 😭 😭

[@qveenora3]

I’m crying

[@galacticcactus5530]

Just watching random medical show clips and this got me. gaaah 😣

[@Seenic69]

That was… *exhales* heavy man… i cant, imma get off for a bit. Hug my dog

[@markhinkle5225]

We live we die, some live longer then others and some die sooner in there life. I don’t believe in religion but I do believe there is a balance in life.

[@Slip_HD]

my greatest fear

[@ChocoBabiChan]

I dont believe in ghosts. That little dead girl that died in your house 100 years ago and is haunting you is actually a demon. I generally believe the soul dies with the body. But there are a select few of innocent and holy righteous people who transition to heaven. All children are innocent, even when theyre not. And I believe by default, they are some of those select few. Not all babies, and by babies, I mean all children despite their age, are meant for this world. They are meant to leave us innocently and pure. All their souls are now living in heaven with God waiting to return. Until then, just keep in mind that they are loved and protected and patiently waiting.

[@lynnecrisp]

She'll go to Heaven tho & it's sad this show wasn't more realistic & tell her that's where she'll go. As a child she will but the parents unless they're saved they won't be w/her but it's a show so they didn't say the truth 🥺

[@samg873]

That really wasn't necessary

[@lynnecrisp]

@@samg873 Yes it was

[@meghanmonroe]

That might be your reality, but that's a religious belief. Not everyone practices your religion or any religion at all. So when you produce your own medical drama, you'll be free to tell your patients where their souls are going.

[@jonathancasais6491]

@@lynnecrisp no, it wasn't. As not everyone follows or agrees with your religious practices

[@lindsayrose26]

Not everyone believes in heaven, souls go where they go. Wherever they may go

[@kingexplosionmurder425]

Wow do not watch this right before doing eyeliner omg 😭

[@denizenofclownworld4853]

That's it. Tell them nonsense.

[@stefanib.4283]

If my kid is dying I'll tell them anythign that will comfort them. She would be going through so much physical pain, no reason to add mental pain as well

[@swathimenon9538]

"Mommy, Can You Hear Me?" "We can hear you little doll!" broke me into tears!

[@poodoodoodoo]

That was me. Thanks for watching. It was a hard scene to shoot.

[@mjnjoroge9264]

@@poodoodoodoowas it cool to be on a show? Also at first I thought u were lying but you’re not 😅

[@poodoodoodoo]

@mjnjoroge9264 It's always cool. It feels a little surreal at times because I got into acting later in life. So when I book a gig and I have to do a scene with someone I watched on TV as a fan it feels a little trippy.😁

[@meghanmonroe]

What a poetic way of explaining the concept of death to a child. No need to muddy it up with religious beliefs or medical jargon. Just a simple, comforting metaphor. Exquisite.

[@samg873]

I loved that explanation

[@xiulingapang6556]

Muddy it up? You are very disrespectful . Just because you don't believe and you're a sad person , doesn't mean you have to say those things . 🙄

[@Febrile1]

Religious beliefs *ARE* an *exquisite comforting metaphor.*

[@meghanmonroe]

@@Febrile1 For a lot of people, that's true. Not for everyone. I was raised evangelical Christian, and now as an adult, not only does religion not bring me comfort, it makes me angry. If you can't be someone who can be mindful of everyone's feelings and beliefs, you are failing as a human being.

[@meghanmonroe]

@@xiulingapang6556 I'm not going to argue with you. You already made your ignorance clear in another comment.

[@Kez_abi]

I knew this was going to break me but I didn't know it would break me this much! 3 years ago our community lost a young gentleman to cancer. There wasn't enough seats in the church for his funeral there were people standing outside listening to the service. We miss you Nic but I hope your not in pain anymore and your flying high.

[@waves2378]

It seems like Nic was really loved in your community. I’m so sorry that happened.

[@erauprcwa]

I hear it... but after working in healthcare, my family ALL being in healthcare. I find it SO selfish when a family member withholds information from the patient. I don't care how much "love" you have, it's selfish when you make their life/death all about you. People are way too afraid of death. Death is NOT the worst thing that can happen to someone.

[@andrewli6606]

Asian culture would agree with the line of thinking of withholding information. The Farewell covers the topic pretty well. Basically, the idea is that knowing you’re dying is worse than being oblivious. I don’t agree with it, but I can’t call it objectively wrong.

[@prissylovejoy702]

Why is it sooo selfish? since they will be the ones left behind grieving the rest of their lives.

[@mach.7594]

@@prissylovejoy702 because the sick person is still a person and they don't have the one thing that the people they will leave behind do; time. They deserve to have a say in the conversation and even if they can't speak up due to age or illness all choices should be made unselfishly and in their best interest. The family will grieve, but they will have time to process that grief.

[@435cyberteam9]

@@prissylovejoy702 So if you were dying, you'd rather go without knowing? Suddenly one day, your body starts failing you and you have no idea why. You never got to live in the moment for the last few that you get, because you would never know those moments would be your last. The only time you'd realise you were dying is literal minutes before. Even if your body began failing you hours or even days before you pass, you'd have no idea what's wrong. "Maybe I'm just ill". "Maybe this is a normal struggle people go through and I'll be back to normal in a week or two". You'd have no idea. You'd just be in pain, and have no idea why. You'd die scared, unsure and confused. When you finally realise you're at the end, your last memories will be regret. "Why didn't I do this thing". "Why didn't I say that thing". All that sounds like an awful way to go. If you know you're dying, you can live in the moment, enjoy the last few moments you have, whether it's only a few days or a few months. You get to abandon the idea of your future and live life to the fullest at that moment in time. And when your body starts to fail, you know why. You don't have that same fear of uncertainty about what is happening, you just fear what is to come. But a lot of people won't even have that, people who know they're dying come to accept that they will die and embrace it in their final moments. A lot of people would rather die ready. They have less regrets, they are less scared, they're more ready for it. If someone is dying and you don't tell them, you rob them of their final moments and put them in a position where they're more scared and full of regret just before they do go. People have a right to know what is happening to them, no matter what it is. And we don't know what happens after death. Maybe they'd still feel the regrets they felt in life after they die. Is it not better to give them a chance to do what they want just in case?

[@sternreport]

@@435cyberteam9 Well, this all comes down to believe and suffering. Personally I would prefer not to know how long till I die, if it doesn't come with pain. Death is hopefully fast and as painless as possible. I wouldn't even be mad if it's early as long as I am not really prepared for it a quick brain death or something while I sleep would be best. Personally I don't believe in anything after death it would just end there and that's the reason why one should always enjoy every moment why do I need the news of my dying to get rid of or work on my regrets?

[@rebeccaross6761]

This one hits home my twin sister was diagnosed with cancer at 4 and she would go in and out of remission we tried everything all over the states but at 9 there was nothing else we could do. We didn’t have to tell her she was dying she told us that she was tired and done fighting and she was ready.

[@rebeccaross6761]

@Southeastern Hub yes she passed almost 20 years ago now

[@TinaLee-x6z]

@@rebeccaross6761 Im so sorry I hope your sister is in a better place

[@angemaidment5640]

Growing up with a lot of medical issues, I know all I wanted was the truth.

[@akward744]

This hits hard.. my best friend was diagnosed with the same cancer Ewings sarcoma.. it was so hard to hear that when we had found out it was already stage 4.. it’s so hard telling a child that they might die and that’s how it was, my best friend fought for two hard long years.. fly high 🕊️

[@EvanMurphyCapstone]

My daughter survived childhood cancer ......there were a couple of times we were told it might be time to start "talking" ...she would bounce in not the 11th hour but the 50th ......during the 3 + yrs she fought- we all fought - she lost 5 friends before she was 8 ......it is impossible to think of much less do "right" .....there are far reaching physical, emotional, psychological effects ...13 yrs cancer free, she is 21 now , her friends never will be - there is guilt, doubt, insecurity, fear, flashbacks, trauma , ptsd.....please donate to St Judes , Give Kids the World , make a wish and cancer research that help change the conversation for innocents who should never have to have it .....thank you

[@EeveelutionStorm]

I'm so happy your little girl survived... I hope she's living a beautiful life and you can enjoy her laughter echoing in your halls for years to come. I hope she's managing her grief okay too. I hope her life is long and lovely. I hope she looks back on her life and smiles, knowing she beat the odds every time. You're child is a blessing and a beautiful gift to this world. Cherish her every day.

[@EvanMurphyCapstone]

@@EeveelutionStorm thank you very much - I have 5 miracles and am incredibly blessed .....she is in intensive therapy - her sibs in therapy as well ( some because I am overprotective some because its a scary journey with lots of pitfalls) very very blessed and lucky they know it is good to get help - thank you for your kind thoughts and wishes ....hope everyone has such support

[@EeveelutionStorm]

@@EvanMurphyCapstone You sound like an incredible parent, prioritizing their mental health and ensuring they can cope with the traumatic hand they were dealt. You're giving them tools that will help them for years and years to come. You're doing amazing. I hope your life is blessed and long and you look back on it with a smile as well. I hope you're life is full of blessings and prosperity from this point onward. May your blessings only double as your life goes on.

[@EvanMurphyCapstone]

@@EeveelutionStorm you are too kind ....I actually have kids who are smarter than me lol ( Thank Heavens!)

[@EeveelutionStorm]

@@EvanMurphyCapstone Haha! They have a great parent to learn from. You clearly love your family dearly and they have an amazing example set for them of how to be a great parent.

[@randomgamingtimewithme]

she's the sweetest doctor who ever lived.

[@TheTrollMastah]

One of the hottest too

[@weavercs4014]

@@TheTrollMastah Dr Reese from Chicago Med

[@TheRoyalFamilythroughtheyears]

Correction it’s who ever will live

[@JustAJinx-ci6hg]

I'd legit give my left arm, leg, and anything else expendable if it meant my (hopeful) future kids could live forever

[@hydrangeas_lover]

God I wasn't ready for this but it was surprisingly comforting and warm.

[@justinchristoph3725]

3:26 "When you asked what it's like when you die" In my head I though "Well, you're about to find out".

[@RatasaurusRex]

This one made a tear roll down my face a bit. It’s just so sad. 😢❤

[@matthewhenthorn3343]

from a none religious starting point it's an amazingly wonderful way of explaining death to a child.

[@doitsu1490]

this was bitter sweet

[@gachawolf8594]

This reminds me of when I lost my grandpa to Covid I know he’s still here with me, just not physically

[@shaunschofield7024]

Thank you for the video. It really shows a good way to practice pediatric medicine by allowing the parents to make decisions as well as the doctor allowing them to stay parents and have the doctor deliver the difficult news. This is a very difficult situation for all parties involved and being a parent I understand how hard it is to talk to their little girl about her diagnosis, but I was reading a book earlier today in medical school called Resolving Ethical Dilemmas A Guide for Clinicians by Bernard Lo and in the chapter Ethical Issues in Pediatrics it says "Physicians should give forthright but compassionate answers when children ask directly about their diagnosis. Deceiving the child would compromise the physician’s integrity and patients’ trust in the medical system." I understand the patients were told directly about the patients diagnosis, but my question is: Did withholding information from the little girl harm her mentally for the time that she was in the hospital before she was told at the end of this video?

[@EeveelutionStorm]

Uh... It's a show? It's not educational. It's a TV drama.

[@shaunschofield7024]

@@EeveelutionStorm I didn't realize that until your comment so thank you for helping me see that. I would argue though that don't most people get their information about life through TV shows now, especially in industries that they are not familiar with. For example, I know nothing about living in the Bayou, but if I watched a show on those living there that's all I would know about that place or lifestyle. I also understand the argument of having TV shows for drama or just viewing pleasure and if they were all similar to real life they probably wouldn't be as entertaining.

[@brandonbarclay6218]

Oh Martha Jones you are a star 0:01

[@rachaelmorris3405]

That was heartbreakingly beautiful

[@lena9498]

That was the best way anyones explaind death in my experionce... I still feel my grandmother near me who i lost when i was nine... I was never quite the same after that

[@Xscor98300]

May Jehovah God bless them whos going thu and all off people in the world. 🙏🏿❤️

[@Ok-bf2qd]

Telling a child they are dying hurts..

[@jennifermunro4374]

ok I was NOT ready for that. My feelings omg actually crying

[@JessicaBielma-sq8wd]

Love you

[@mikaelpersaud5094]

Mom: i want you to stay forever, i won´t be able to watch you grow up. Tiana: You worry too much, I`ll still be here, though you won`t be able to see me, you can call me.

[@JessicaBielma-sq8wd]

❤

[@Isinforblood]

Watching this just make u want to collapse no young child should have to endure dying 💔🥺😭

[@mareya3677]

What movie is this and where is part 2

[@jilla-dr9hu]

Is child at even that age, shouldn’t be kept in the dark about their healthcare. Morally it’s right to explain to the child what’s happening and what’s going to happen and to help them if they are dying to come to terms with it.

[@tommacek6134]

When you think you are going through something really hard. REMEMBER THIS VIDEO. I can’t stop crying.

[@tiffanymonique7098]

I like that concept you're just on a different side of the room😔😭..

[@LilChelle]

I am NOT crying!!!! 🥹

[@DavidDamen-ve7br]

omg i almost cried during this well done to the actors and actresses you were fantastic

[@christianhdzm]

2:17, at this point it was not about her

[@Vickyy_]

Heartbreaking..😭

[@DeeBrown1239]

Only in Ohio💀💀💀

[@cheetavontiebolt9971]

Poor little girl

[@SamanthaMayerGaming]

This is sad

[@najmabegum5789]

Too painful to watch😢

[@kathy3939]

It’s sad to see no one can answer this girl’s question.

[@mikaelpersaud5094]

This is what snowman(father david)was talking about.

[@haileysparkle-wk3gz]

Don't cry don't cry 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@mia24589]

i just cried

[@Comicsluvr]

Damn...I was doing so well, not crying...

[@sallylouw3222]

🚜

[@maxsiemens304]

Sometimes you need to say it straight up your dying bluntly no deception for little feelings

[@shiro7121]

Thanks youtube, it's 4 am and i'm crying like a baby

[@chyndb]

This is too sad to watch on my birthday Arg

[@fox_edits3267]

I almost cried woah

[@simaharpak3872]

😢😢😢😢😢😢

[@Ixfuckxu]

🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹