"YOUR WELCOME" with Michael Malice

[@MichaelMaliceofficial]

Dave took questions from supporting listeners exclusively at malice.locals.com/post/6263799/dave-took-your-questions

[@Lowbrow_Mthakathi]

Malice on the Biltong train, hell yeah! You should try droewors as well, also a great South African meat snack.

[@ez56789]

Happy to see u annoying pseudo intellectual talking nutsacks are dropping in views. Rather drill holes in my toes than listen to the complete buffoonery out of either of u two.

[@victoramarelo8182]

Sugar is a nutrient, soy is a nutreint dense food, beef jerky is a carcinogen. Science.

[@Dxwill10]

"Do you wanna hear some of my material?" "Not really, no." *wheeze*

[@TopShelfTheology]

Once in a while I need to be reminded that Dave is funny.

[@pearleycunningham]

@@TopShelfTheologyit’s pretty occasional

[@Choegoup]

@@TopShelfTheology This is the feeling i get on skanks. He slows things down and sucks at times, but then he does a one-liner that gets the biggest laugh of the episode.

[@Robot-Overlord]

​@@Choegoup skanks is easily the bottom of the bucket of comedy.

[@jmacdouglasr]

I see Michael and Dave together, and I click like.

[@mishypoo]

Me too!

[@tonysimicich4974]

Me too! Like all the cool kids!

[@jaydee5447]

That is a very homosexual comment

[@Brendonforgoop]

Do you really think your thought are your own? That your not controlled by George soros? Naive weakling .

[@Japper-]

I'm g a y

[@Verkinggettorix]

A few weeks from an election.....An entire podcast about Malice's potential comedy career....makes sense I’m not complaining I just find that funny ha

[@bradvincent2586]

It’s literally comedic relief, relax. This was therapeutic for me. What do you want him to say? We know what’s gonna happen. Trump wins, country gets a little better, then it gets a lot worse, then good in the long run. On towards liberty.

[@joeyservo]

To be fair, what else is there to discuss at this point?

[@davidfoarde558]

I was just thinking that. I’m not knocking them cause I get everyone has probably talked it to death but still I just listened to Dave’s show where he said he was voting for Trump and I was looking forward to hearing Malice’s reaction. I was just fast forwarding, I think this is the whole show 😂

[@TopShelfTheology]

He was going to have another guest more relevant, political, I'll even hint that it had to do with censorship ahead of the election, but they had to cancel last minute, and Dave's basically always on hand for Michael because he's a.... stand-up guy. But I'm serious, that's really why.

[@troll_kin9456]

I'm sure the anarchist will care deeply about your election priorities.

[@3rdGeorgesheets]

DAMNIT Malice! Go do a Kill Tony and then do a minute midway through the show. I've been saying this so long there's no way you haven't seen my bullshit 😂.. You got this dude. Do it. Big Tony would have you on in a heartbeat.

[@Romulocks]

100%. He would murder on Kill Tony.

[@georgewallace8933]

everything you said was accurate. except 'big tony'

[@JackKerouac93]

I'd imagine only his gay wop loverboy calls him "Big Tony"

[@darbyohara]

Malice could pull together a solid minute

[@nickdescalzo1360]

This is the way.

[@skepticalhippo6376]

So glad we got to tune into this private conversation about stuff no one cares about.

[@AlexandraAndStuff]

conversations about comedy are straight up one of the most boring ones if you're not part of the inner circle

[@qcrew2938]

Are u kidding me! Mike every single podcast talks about comedy. We come to you for everything else. BOOOOO

[@Thaelkor]

Dave just straight up said no LOL

[@kimcatacutan8980]

Thank goodness. I think Malice should stay away from standup. I have a bad feeling about it. 😂

[@n8works]

Why do comedians like to circle jerk about how tough and cool doing comedy is? We get it. We don't care.

[@pearleycunningham]

Amen… this conversation has already played out on JRE 100+ times

[@kimcatacutan8980]

@@pearleycunninghamYes. My least favorite Rogan shows are when he talks to comedians. It’s exhausting.

[@pearleycunningham]

@@kimcatacutan8980 seriously… it was cool hearing about comedians coming up in the comedy world the first 5 times or so lol… but also also annoying how Rogan treats them like a different class of ppl from the “civilians”

[@kimcatacutan8980]

​@@pearleycunningham Yes! Rogan just embarrasses himself now pretending to be an elite comedian. He's not good. Most of his podcasts are getting hard to watch because says the same things over and over, and he often talks more than his guests. Malice sometimes does that, and he sometimes has a know-it-all attitude and disagrees too much with his guests. Just my take.

[@bubbrubb9733]

@@n8works Exactly, they completely miss the point of their current relevance. Being a standup may have started been the beginning of their viewers but they’re far past that now. I don’t watch any podcasters standup with the exception of maybe Tim Dillon or Theo because theirs is actually funny. Dave at least normally only says his show dates at the beginning and moves on. Unless Malice moves back to political relevance, his peak may have been during Covid. The last JRE episode with a comedian I listened to was Kat

[@SaphiraTa]

Im a simple man. I see Smith and Malice, I click.

[@TopShelfTheology]

Michael was going to have another guest on this week, and they had to cancel last minute, so he reached out to Dave to fill the slot. Michael knew he could depend on Dave, because he's a ... stand-up guy.

[@janetanderson3941]

😂😂😂😂

[@jamesbanks2611]

You guys have been slacking on these crossover shows, come on man America needs you!

[@anthonyy3594]

Michael Malice find the one topic that I don't want to hear Dave Smith talk about... comedy. He is the ultimate troll

[@Evenflovv]

I really have no idea how you came to the conclusion that getting into the nitty-gritty of stand-up is something the general public is still interested in, even after hours of exploring it on JRE.

[@johnwarring2337]

I don't know how to say this better; I get so jazzed every time I see a Malice/Smith convo posted. Absolutely jazzed.

[@JerseySlayer]

marvelous

[@carlsagan6017]

I’ve grown so tired of hearing about the comedy life. Same thing: for years you struggle and finally now are making it. Comedy is entertaining. Talking about it isn’t unless you’re a comedian.

[@robfreeman5783]

yep. mind numbing self indulgence and self congratulatory bs....

[@kimcatacutan8980]

Hearing about it is even more useless

[@theegodkingmammz1595]

Video starts at 1:56. Youre welcome, no pun intended 😂

[@johnpendarvis7885]

*your*

[@polysaturated]

Source?

[@andrewvickers]

@@johnpendarvis7885 🤣

[@theegodkingmammz1595]

@@johnpendarvis7885 its actually not “your” its “you’re”. Its a compounding of the words “you are” which is correct grammar. He even says it at the end, the last words before the end of every podcast. “You are welcome” he doesnt spell it that way in the title of his show, which perhaps might have been oversight from him or just laziness as we all use the two “your” and “you’re” interchangeably, but since you’re going to be a dick and grammar blast me ill blast you right back and say you’re wrong. 🤭 look it up. “Hey google- is it ‘your welcome’ or ‘you’re welcome.’ Itl say the word your is a possessive pronoun that doesnt fit in this context.

[@CBRONXY]

u mean 2:18?

[@TheStacanova]

The BEST thing to watch is Mitch Hedberg’s Comedy Central special! They edited the broadcast so you wouldn’t know, but he put the full special on his DVD & the 1st half, like 15-20 minutes he completely bombs, it’s so awkward & uncomfortable to watch, Mitch actually sits down on the stage, but then he slowly starts to bring the crowd around and by the end he’s killing! It’s so fascinating!

[@kimcatacutan8980]

Whole show is just Malice getting comedy advice from Dave. I watched it all for some reason. Ugh

[@3y3l33t]

Love the way he puts comic in quotes.

[@King-O-Hell]

It's not fair because Dave Smith is really "funny"

[@TuxedoTalk]

This is the most anarchist podcast to make right before an election. I love it.

[@robfreeman5783]

Sorry guys, but this episode was such a dud. An hour of Dave giving advice about being a comic. C'mon, we want to hear politics and libertarian shit. So much to talk about right now other than how to get started in comedy.

[@JollyRoger183]

49:03 that "not really" was cold and dry af. 😂

[@AJ-HawksToxicFinger]

I love Dave channel Malice himself with the most 'Michael Malice' style honest answer ever: No, I don't wanna hear your material, I'd rather respect you

[@wesleyharris7743]

As long as Dave & Malice keep doing these, everything is gonna be ok.

[@GTOJOE2004]

I went back and fourth between Dave smith and Malice content today. Good timing lol.

[@a.k.4o]

Take a drink every time Dave says like

[@jordangallina6188]

A podcast about inside comedy. Woooo 🎉 /s

[@kimcatacutan8980]

Sarcasm?

[@jordangallina6188]

@@kimcatacutan8980 the utmost

[@kimcatacutan8980]

@@jordangallina6188 Whew!

[@victorseaton9123]

Two of my favorite people people.

[@chriscollier2965]

What a waste of Dave Smith's time. No one needed to hear Malice elicit a standup comedian pep talk. Just do it already! Neurotic insecurity is unfunny.

[@kimcatacutan8980]

He’s not funny in a standup comedy way, imo. One way to find out.

[@thebadger1993]

Seinfeld was built entirely on neurotic insecurity, but I agree with the spirit of your comment

[@kozmosnotgay]

I love how his thumbnails for his videos always include a picture of Michael Mallis laughing hysterically. Really puts me in the mood to hear a nice fun lighthearted conversation.

[@crustis5958]

My 2 favorite js

[@seanofpeace]

Horrible books exist forever. A bad live comedy set is ephemeral.

[@Aphixx]

Not if they shut down the internet archive (which is actively happening right now ever since they lost their recent suit...and then got hacked). Try searching for any covid vax info, it's already nuked.

[@SpontaneousEvolution]

Except Rogans "comedy".

[@anthonysmeltink8412]

@@SpontaneousEvolution Rogan has done more for comedy than almost anyone else that’s ever lived. It’s just sad bitter losers online who try to shit on him.

[@SpontaneousEvolution]

@@anthonysmeltink8412 you must have misread my comment.

[@anthonysmeltink8412]

@@SpontaneousEvolution I don't think so

[@cameronscott7304]

I would love for Neil Hamburger or Greg to be on this show one day

[@dizzykincade7831]

How do Mike and Dave not just have a regular podcast?😊

[@Justen1980]

They did that a lot during the lock-down years I wonder why they stopped.

[@a.k.4o]

Dave is not self aware at all.

[@BlyGuy]

The Chappelle and John Mayor shows are f*ckin awesome.

[@MrFromminsk]

Michael and Dave are the best combo

[@georgedonner2115]

To my 15 year old self..... "Drop out of school, get a GED, pick up a trade. You don't have to do it forever, just get started with real life."

[@redmuskratt]

Dave doing Kurt almost made me spit my water out. Bro, give me a warning!

[@joshuabadten3160]

I didn't know what to call it during his opening. 'Metatroll' is perfect!

[@Tbrad85]

One of these days I’m gonna count how many times Dave says the work “Like”

[@Nathan-cx2wg]

dont do it with uhhmms. he uses both fluently. I'm used to it now though.

[@jamesguinan7319]

It’s like A LOT!

[@brianomoli4]

This is the main thing that bugs me about Dave. He talks like a fucking Valley Girl.

[@ZomVees_Garden_Supplies]

I opened up the transcript and searched like and got back 574 hits on the page...

[@polysaturated]

It really gets out of hand when he’s agitated. I always think of the Community episode where Chevy Chases character helps one of the students with public speaking and angrily yells “LIKE!” when she uses the word, perhaps Dave needs a shock collar or something. Don’t make it a drinking game, you’re going to die of liver failure. Better to just speak slowly, Douglas Murray does this, in combination with the English accent it makes him sound very smart…

[@ericflynn6541]

Malice could do it for sure. Idk if he would enjoy not being great at it at first but he can absolutely get really good.

[@henzoko5946]

I cant wait for the ads every 10-15 minutes

[@Robby_C]

What a great troll, 2 weeks before the election Malice has a political pundit who’s never written a punchline on to talk about stand-up comedy.

[@tabularasa820]

The Libertarian Tupac.

[@beastcraw]

Valley Girl

[@AH-tx1nj]

Mc Hiavellian

[@Dementia.Pugilistica]

@7:50 immediately thought of Joe Rogan

[@barst33lpr0]

I need to see Malice do stand up. Or at least be a guest on Kill Tony

[@kimcatacutan8980]

Yes. Maybe that will stop him from thinking it’s a real option.

[@mattymessner9185]

Neil Hamburger!!!! Comic fucking genius. I saw him my first week in SF host an awards show back in 2000. I think like 20 of us were laughing out of 550 people. Soooo good

[@derekzicari2181]

These guys are great but this pod sucked

[@philipvecchio3292]

When I was traveling for work I was always in kind of remote hotels and venturing out took a lot of time and energy. It's too easy to get lost and and get sick when traveling.

[@15forseenh]

I was just hoping we'd get another epic crossover!

[@HJ-jy7fw]

Don't do it, Michael. Jeremy Piven 2.0.

[@kimcatacutan8980]

I totally agree

[@xrunner55]

At 24.59, Dave admits to lasting at least 5 minutes with his wife.

[@ExtremelyRightWing]

Its the non aggression principle.

[@s.kelley9403]

Patrice O'Neal not being here to talk about modern culture is a travesty

[@TimeWarp2000]

Now i remember listening to another pod a couple months ago with Dave Smith as guest, and Dave said he wasn’t a fan of Michael. Maybe it was a joke that I didn’t have context for

[@kimcatacutan8980]

I’d like to hear that. Which podcast?

[@brentsbackyardredneckery]

I don't know about everyone else, but this is a Presidential ticket I could get behind.

[@jakeg848]

Dave and Mike Malice are the most deranged and out of touch freaks. I love them!

[@DaleDaSnail420xXx]

I would see a Michael Malice Live Show

[@danysnow4237]

I fucking love you guys. That is all. ❤

[@AIRDOODOO]

Great show guys, made me forget the state of things.

[@CChristi5]

EVERYONE should vote for Trump if they really want a 3rd party. He’s not perfect, but he is not one of the 2 parties for sure!! That’s why they both hate him.

[@Kinson09]

why is '#334' hyperlinked in the show title lol. Great show, love you MM. Come home to the Catholic Church brother

[@timwalsh6283]

The problem is SOOO many comedians tell their stories and they tend to be the same story about hotels, night clubs, and airline travel.

[@irongunner1221]

1.8m viewers... Malice is bigger than CNN!

[@RcCapozzi]

Dave hated on Reason for interviewing Meghan McCain, but Michael did so several months ago. Not a fan of John McCain -- quite the opposite -- but he was her father. Some are too tone deaf to recognize familial loyalty.

[@VoidUruk]

Oooh you missed the parts where he said he also use to be on panels with her and that it's not the interview that's the problem. It's the soft interview while shitting on other libertarians. "The audacity" and all that. Don't forget those parts.

[@RcCapozzi]

@@VoidUruk Dave noted that the LPNH memes are inappropriate. And Malice's interview months ago with Meghan was also "soft," iirc.

[@brianomoli4]

Michael calls Meghan and her husband his friends. I don’t get it. They both seem like duds.

[@RcCapozzi]

@@brianomoli4 I dunno, I have friends who are not libertarian. And Ben & Meghan seem like good company to me, despite their politics.

[@bogdanpopescu1401]

@@RcCapozzi Malice's interviews are all soft, by design; no double standard there

[@Isaiditandimsorryyourupset]

My two favorite nerds

[@robertholston4708]

I feel like i need to look up John Mayer standup now.

[@generaltso9402]

Malice gonna dabble in comdey.

[@Justen1980]

He was the head writer for Kim Jong Un Roast!

[@Plumbob-nd2kc]

Two of the greatest minds this century. Poor Tom Woods, he tried so hard!

[@bocephus517]

Lauren Chen's stand up > Michael Malice's stand up

[@torrasque0151]

Speaking of, has anyone heard from her?

[@cameronscott7304]

Wait. Huh?

[@matthewdavis4655]

Michael: I saw bad stand-up and thought 'I, too, can suck on stage'

[@elzardsikkema6914]

A bland, unfunny conversation. MM is great, but this boring and full of politician level platitudes.

[@dabberowl]

Two of my favorites on one podcast, hella stoked!!

[@MattSturbaiten]

Thanks for the break from politics boys! We all need it this week

[@sarahjerose1749]

Finally!

[@jkc9193]

Dave, you're interesting and I wanted to stay tuned in, but could not.The consistent use of "like" was too much. Should this be a habit, please consider speech therapy. I say this with respect.

[@YanraOnesja]

80085

[@JoeNeutrino]

I'm noticing it now. Why would you do this to me.

[@krackerr]

Does malice know fans hate when they talk about the art comedy jesus snoozefest

[@r.c.7762]

Michael, set Dave straight.

[@MG-me7iw]

Impossible. That closet's empty.

[@neilwheel]

I think you'll find that it's "YOU'RE Welcome"...

[@dav3Dexter]

GOATS!!! LEGENDS!!!!! ❤

[@b_unky]

I would pay to watch you. Maybe take the pressure off by not labeling it "stand-up". Instead, just a conversation, Henry Rollins style "Talking With Malice"

[@cloudbloom]

Dave rules

[@user-em9su3dd9y]

I think you would be a good comic, Dave you should give it a go. Also Malice, you would be great at it.

[@Stitchlii]

Cutest married couple ever

[@brooke1496]

the secret to changing the world is say something interesting, and lock down the phones, exit at :44.

[@mikedunne1584]

Has anyone ever noticed that Malice is always funnier than the "comic"?

[@franckiewicz0831]

Two weeks until we vote for the trump train. All aboard!!!!!

[@4Timesdafunky]

Dave, please respond to Konstantin's "response" to your criticism

[@javiercbk]

Vamos Miguel Malicia!!!!

[@RMF76]

Just what the world needs. Another bad comedian from the Rogan sphere.

[@thebadger1993]

I encourage everyone to pursue their dreams and try new things, but this would really have been better off as a private conversation between friends.

[@natk8541]

Just for Laughs still exists but it's not a big widespread thing. I've seen Soder, Shaffir and Big Jay at JFL shows in the recent years.

[@jrk1666]

Did Malice ever explained how he came to be an underwear model of all thing ?

[@philipvecchio3292]

He has. Sheath underwear has sponsored him for years and he asked them if he could and he the asked the company they said yes. I think he was on a pretty intense workout regimen before he went for the photo shoot

[@lloydbraun6026]

Woods didn’t workout so they hired Malice

[@christophergreyson6953]

@@lloydbraun6026 Good one.

[@dr.matthewhertert310]

i can't decide whether it would be a more amazing story if michael becomes a huge comedy star or if it would be a more amazing story if michael totally flopped in the attempt.

[@joshdh46]

I have quite literally never heard someone (even teenage girls) who say "like" so much. Good lord dude

[@neirinski]

Malice, much like Destiny, is a girl’s name.

[@nilskp]

@@neirinski you're thinking of Alice

[@bab-cast1973]

Michael's Botox filter lmao

[@a.k.4o]

A tough crowd

[@nickcoble4124]

Does A.I. Michael Malice do the ad reads???

[@prestonpowell9222]

Thank you for putting "comic" in quotation marks! Love Dave but I've never laughed at his comedy.