My experience on Grindr and Sniffies

[@barrystarke8088]

The best way to meet someone genuine is to join a Gay Meetup group - hiking, golfing, bowling, whatever and there you will find genuine people

[@DominickWhelton]

I know a few friends in those who love them!

[@SunilKumar-bn9bn]

Hi, how to find this kind of Gay Meetup group - hiking, golfing, bowling.

[@WhiteRaven696]

Grindr is such a soul-killer TBH

[@DominickWhelton]

It can be!

[@vince7735]

@@DominickWhelton Do you even believe we have souls?

[@TheRainbowCoach]

It's even darker: the people who lie about their weight or age is because they know nobody would even react if they were honest. That's the real toxicity of it all.

[@f45125]

The ads are very annoying.

[@American.Gemini]

Is it “toxicity” or just lack of interest? No one should feel bad for simply not finding someone attractive, even if our beauty standards are sold to us by Hollywood. If I’m not interested, I’m good

[@BH-wk8vd]

I’ve been catfished and ghoshef way too many times to the point I’m jaded

[@DominickWhelton]

Ugh, im so sorry!

[@danielperez2215]

Erma Bombeck said it best in her book: "The Grass is Always Greener Over The Septic Tank!"

[@gulfcoastmodern8103]

And, If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, Why am I Always in the Pits?

[@Drewbydrew]

As someone who doesn’t really drink much, and has gotten soooo tired of the apps, god I wish there was an easier way to meet people that wasn’t for the express purpose of hooking up

[@DominickWhelton]

like a weekely late night coffee shop mixer for gays!

[@Luniel11]

Ah, fellow seeker of meaningful connections, I hear you! The clubbing and nightlife scene isn’t for everyone, and honestly, the apps can feel like a chaotic grind if you’re not looking for a quick fling. But here’s the thing: the apps aren’t inherently bad-you just have to level up your approach. Think of it like optimizing your character stats in an game. Fill out your profile completely-include your interests, a solid self-description, and clear, accurate photos. It's like crafting a beacon for the right people to find you. Sure, it can feel a little vulnerable, but without it, your potential best friend (or more!) might just scroll right past thinking you’re an NPC. Now, if the app grind feels like an endless fetch quest, ditch it for real-world side missions. Refine your skills and dive into hobbies you’re passionate about. If a nerd like me can find thriving local communities, attend conventions, and spaces for people to connect socially over shared interests, so can anyone! There are meetups, interest-based events, or even workshops where you can find your people. It’s about finding those spaces where your authentic self can shine, whether you’re geeking out over tabletop RPGs, perfecting your latte art, cars, plants, art, or learning salsa (no drinking required). Trust me-your people are out there, waiting for their party to form. You just gotta roll the dice and join the quest! 🤓

[@swiftismymum4544]

Love how your videos are straight to the point, artistically edited, valuable ... Thank you for sharing

[@DominickWhelton]

thank you!

[@shadowboy032]

Took an 8 month break from the apps. Just returned. Same deal, but did myself the favor to be prepared for the same song and dance. Protect your mental health, and be kind to yourself too!

[@Alex-g4q4r]

I think the core of this issue is that our connection and socialization as gay men is unfortunately paywalled right now. We want connection and community, and the benefits you ascribe to Grindr are really just having met people. That’s not Grindr really, that’s the meeting of people. I think the gay bar represents the same issues with Grindr but in the physical space, it’s profiting off of our desire for a place to connect. Thank you for mentioning that point about stalking and Sniffies, I hadn’t considered them. I’ve had to basically relegate Grindr and the apps to “right now” use because they’re SO addictive that it’s forced me to remove it out of my life otherwise I’ll spend all day trawling and searching in a way that’s not really who I am, it’s the training of the slot machine.

[@CollinW93]

I am in agreement with everything you said. These apps have really made it hard. Yes even people say “you just gotta put yourself out there” but where? As you said the bar scene is awkward now. Ugh. Anyways have a great Sunday!

[@DominickWhelton]

Have a great week Collin! Thanks for watching!

[@FriendofDorothy]

the "bar scene" is expensive as hell now. No thanks. Too many women hanging out in leather bars and bars that used to be places where a man could enjoy some erotic camaraderie..

[@sg8191]

I believe that if you truly want to live and find what you're looking for, you need to expose yourself and get out there. It's not easy for everyone. Ιt's time-consuming and challenging in our days, where everything has become digital. No app can ever replace natural attraction and presence and therefore the first impression.

[@DominickWhelton]

In person is always the best!

[@FriendofDorothy]

not to mention app hook-ups are dicey as hell.

[@billy_boys]

Thanks. Yeah, I'm using Sniffies and have a 6 months subscription. Sometimes it's ok, sometimes not. I use it mostly for hookups, and I'd love to find a life partner, but I'm unsure if I can do it, lol. I'm from NYC and guys are generally polite and chill. I got turned away several times after we exchanged pix, talked, and discussed what we were into. You go to someone's place and this person tells you that is not the vibe (it happened to me 3 times). I've never turned away a person at my door but some guys think it's normal. I immediately block people after that. Why? Because I respect my time. I share my status, my pix are freshly made, I have my testing ready to show and we both know what we need from each other. And we both know we will never see each other again (98%). Why are u playing fool? Sometimes we become FWB and meet from time to time for our hot times 😁 Sometimes guys block me right after we had a hot time together, lol. But % of such guys is super small. I always block people who have never shown up after we discussed everything, lol. That's it.

[@AdrianEric]

I think it's all about your personal experience! i met the love of my life about a year and a half ago on tinder lol when i wasn't looking and was content with being alone. nonetheless i think we live in a world where it's okay to meet your person any way you seem fit. there's no rule book to life ❤

[@DominickWhelton]

so true! Love that for you guys!

[@cyrexgames]

It's refreshing to know that someone as talented and good looking as you can still experience friction in the dating world. I mean I don't want you to have to experience it that much, but it's nice to see that average looking guys like me aren't the only ones experiencing this awful trend in gay dating apps. I deleted all dating apps from my phone a few years ago. I do use Boo because it at least tries to connect people through interests first rather than looks and statistics. I seem to run into the guys that want a serious relationship by the end of the week or they move onto the next guy. Not even enough time to develop feelings for one another, and they are already looking for the next person to latch onto.

[@Cool_Guy_86_Ja]

In my experience, grindr is mostly a toxic environment. That said, both my current and previous relationships are with guys I found on the app. But that's rare. You have to kiss a million frogs on there to find one half decent prince 😅

[@vivarino1521]

With bars, it’s easier to meet people during a Sunday funday instead of out at night

[@SABOREAME68]

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Good video Dominick. Stay Safe & Healthy... Abrazos

[@DominickWhelton]

thank you! thanks for watching!

[@MRJLS15]

Always appreciate you having a open mind and more

[@DominickWhelton]

aw thank you!

[@OLDS98]

It seems it is still a struggle in the community to meet someone. It seems the issues have not changed either. People still want to meet people face to face and have some sort of connection with someone. I cannot honestly tell you what should happen or what others should do. I have not tried for years and I was very bad at it when I did. No, I am not with anyone and I have not tried for quite sometime. I am all for people who can meet someone and connect and more. The issue is doing the difference between someone looking for romance or looking for fun/hooking up. Thank you Dominick.

[@oldsouthpaw]

Been with my husband 39 years, sure we look around, but don't touch! we met in Savannah GA at a gay bar called the whos who! love your videos and stories!

[@DominickWhelton]

Love that! And thats great. Honestly its just what works best for the couple :)

[@edgarnino2039]

I am using both, sniffies is more for hook up and Grindr is a little more of date and also hook up, the always going to be sneaky situations all you need is to be safe always safe and no give to much information at start a conversation

[@kylewambot2664]

4:42 😂😂😂😂😂😂 when i saw sniffies for the first time i had this moment for realz. Mine went more like, "every garbage can garbage 🗑 has its lid" though 😅 Its feels like a c.l. revival c.l. meets i guess grindr

[@Carl-x8y3c]

I'm in my sixties. I would never hook up with anyone. It's all so sad. I'm not being unkind either.

[@DominickWhelton]

To each their own!

[@vince7735]

I don't think it's safe anymore. There are a lot of people with mental health issues (pretty exterior doesn't equal safe to be with) and unhygienic people, and too many people who aren't gay know about the apps. I feel these apps and our sexually unrestrained lifestyles, promoted by social media and the internet, will lead to another big sexual health crisis, wait and see.

[@billcole2501]

I got off the apps a long time ago. I reached a certain point in life where it’s just not worth the hassle. Plus, I’m lucky enough to work at a gay bar in LA so I meet a lot of people at work. Although I do not hook up with them. It’s a nice way to stay connected to the community, however.

[@DominickWhelton]

That sounds like the best place to meet people :) You can see them in person and see how they act and they decide from there if you even want to talk to them :)

[@ImXavierBryant]

I love it here!

[@jcgrant1234]

Amen, brother!

[@DominickWhelton]

thanks for watching!

[@abesterbean9024]

I have no hook up apps or anything no dating apps nada. Life is great I don’t even worry about that anymore. I think I enjoy life better that way.

[@ayindestevens6152]

Grindr was a hassle but Sniffies I’ve had more luck. I’ll say this about that app. I’ve seen some really nice apartments in NYC as a result.

[@davidpankratz142]

So many good points and meaningful relationships r hard to find but have a open mind this was good

[@DominickWhelton]

open mind is always best!

[@totallyradjeff]

You are spot on...

[@ezelldaniels6064]

This video was definitely needed bro.

[@DominickWhelton]

Thanks for watching!

[@Tripper111]

Dude I'm a tad older than you and back when I came out we didn't have apps at all or smartphones we would do personal ads in newspapers and I met a good amount of really good people. And we met people in bars which was just the norm I guess

[@Drozit0]

"If I see another Iphone 4 foto..." Preach it, sister

[@DominickWhelton]

Right??? Im over it!

[@cwj144]

The issue I see is why couples have grinder

[@DominickWhelton]

Each couple has their own rules. Thats for them to decide :)

[@jonnyfendi2003]

Exactly. Couples on Grindr are like “happily married but we play separate “🙄🙄🙄

[@cwj144]

@jonnyfendi2003 kinda of sad. But what I have discovered through conversation is that one of them is having some type of issue.

[@Tony-cv4of]

Oh my goodness SNIFFIES is the worst, I HATE IT!💀 1. sad part is you got 18 year olds AND 19 year olds on this app trying to hit you up when you're like old enough to be their big brother or uncle. 2. You have guys That DON'T look at your bio before hitting you up after clarifying what your interested are and NOT interested IN. 3. Gangstalk a group of guys will know each other, yet they will try to reach out to you and spit games, BUT the moment you're not interested in one of them, you get harassed or they'll use anonymous account to talk crap to you

[@harperwiccan475]

I’m 39 and thought for a long time that being a awkward introvert gay was my setback until two years ago when I got my late diagnosis for being Autistic and NOW for the first time in my life I am fully convinced that it’s okay for me to stay single until the right man is willing to accept me as an Asexual Autistic individual who is willing to have separate bedrooms in our apartment for each of us to have our own individual space. I desperately need my own space/room. I now understand that my Autistic needs and priorities literally drop my chances with 99% of the Gay male population but omg, I just need ONE man in my life who will get a LOYAL and LOVING man (me) in return. 😢 Being on Grinder and other Gay hookup apps make this impossible which is why I’ve been Gay app sober for 10 years now.

[@DominickWhelton]

Its TOTALLY okay to wait until the right one comes along :)) its all about whats best for YOU

[@MrAlen6e]

I wish there was an app for gay events and interest like, create different events like movies, book clubs, networking, museum runs, cocktail bar hooping, coffe& tea groups , like group meetups for speed dating, this would make it much more interesting in my opinion than the current apps. Im personally so tired of the sam interview questions , the catfish and lies is gross and dangerous.

[@andrewclarke3622]

I would have to agree with Sniffies. Some what Grindr too. I dont like the hook up culture, Im not the hump and dump type. Plus, like you said about Sniffies, I dont like the setting myself up to be stalked. Im simply too old fashioned.

[@DominickWhelton]

Not saying it happens all the time, but just being careful around it! :)

[@briandbenson]

I’m def the opposite… I’m blindfolded ass up with the door propped ;) Don’t forget to tally your load!

[@DougWest-c4y]

LA is awesome and overwhelming on the apps.. I am 0 for 3 in the relationship department… so I tend to look for fun and a “what’s your name again” as we part type of situation. I feel bad for people looking for love and monogamy in LA…. Not sure it’s possible

[@DominickWhelton]

Its here. It exists. I know lots of people in monogamous relationships. But also in open ones. It really comes down to finding someone who shares the same desires as you in a relationship. :)

[@yndalecioisaachinojosa4985]

I love meeting people at private dinner parties, but I don't see those events as much anymore because of the apps. 😢

[@jwaggoner1991]

Luckily, I met my husband naturally through a friend; however, when I had Grindr, I got so many slurs and fetishization that it really turned me off. I truly felt like there was nothing there for me. I know someone who only specifically dates Black men for their endowments. That’s the first thing he says is important.

[@DominickWhelton]

Love you met your true love through friends! Sounds amazing. Happy for you! Im sorry the apps weren't the best for you. Tons of people unfortunately have negative experiences. But, their lack of respect has notthing to do with you. Keep shining your light!

[@Nashanton]

Is it odd to say it seems safer to meet a person at a bar and go home with them than it did when i was using scruff and grindr. Sure you get a pre"label" of selected information they chose to divulge on the app, but the reverse could be said about meeting a person at a bar via conversation. It comes down to us having our personal standard/ codes of honor, as to what makes us comfortable enough to engage with these "strangers. We have to protect ourselves and hope that the other person is doing the same for themself. I feel like many points could be made for and against. All being food for thought.

[@borg9355]

The apps depend a lot I think on where you live. Where I am no one and I mean no one is looking for friends, for example, even when their profile says they are.

[@diegoiunou]

I stopped using the apps because I invested like 8 years of my life in them, and I never found someone above hook up material. But then I get all this people saying the app worked great for them, and they even made "friends". I know this is your case, but I call it BS, because after talking with hundreds of guys I've never encountered a single one who was open to the idea of NOT hooking up.

[@DominickWhelton]

I totally get that. Over the 8ish years ive had it, i can only count on one hand the really friendships/relationships that came from it.

[@turnne]

You can set anonymous settings on Sniffies

[@DominickWhelton]

smart!

[@ronaldturneur8919]

I think the problem with those apps isn't the apps themselves but the people on them. I used to think Tinder was for forming genuine connections while Grindr was a hookup app... until I talked to a person on Tinder who just wanted to hook up, and I've had several boyfriends emerge from Grindr. It all just depends on so many factors what you can expect from whichever app you're using. Experiences vary

[@DominickWhelton]

Totally! Its like every app is different haha.

[@kodyduclos5845]

Please talk about Tinder and hinge!

[@DominickWhelton]

haha, okay :)

[@jhaeros]

Met my partner of 4 years on Grindr and haven't looked back :) It works!

[@DominickWhelton]

love that for you!

[@rickinmo6837]

❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@larscolson1383]

A friend of mine told me his plan for finding his next boyfriend. He sat down and made a list of what interests he wanted to share with someone. He then went to do those interests in a group, when possible with a gay group. If he builds a friendship, it would be with with the interest as a connection and if no friendships grew at least he would be doing something he liked. Whenever I chat with someone who is on an app and they do the whole "I'm seeking true love" I tell them the story above and that they should get off the app.

[@DominickWhelton]

Thats a great idea! There are lots of gay teams/groups here in west hollywood :)

[@sp-bl1sl]

Grindr and Scruff are not designed to help you find dates/love; if that happens you theoretically will not be on Scruff and Grindr anymore, and Scruff and Grindr don't want that. In my area, Scruff is a little more "date oriented" and Grindr is more hook up. But it's really all mostly best for hooking up.

[@DominickWhelton]

Yeah I dont think any of them really want you to find anyone. They want your money! haha

[@n00ter99]

Grindr was never about finding love. If you go there looking for that you're gonna be disappointed. It has 50 million MAUs so of course it happens, but it's the exception not the normal.

[@dualblade1617]

I've actually seen you on grindr 😂

[@christopherfaulk9732]

It's even harder when you are disabled. There are even lessers spots for us to gather in. I used to use the apps, but it was mostly guys who fetishized my disabilty, or they have hooking up with a wheelchair user on a hookup bucket list. Even at pride events, I've gotten ignored, drinks spilled on me, and guys jumping onto my lap who want a ride. I still have hope I'll meet someone, but by chance and not an app.

[@billwestervelt8557]

While I'm on a couple of apps. I don't used them when I have and connected with someone and actulaly met, there wasn't any connection. I'v had much better luchk with social groups where I get to know somebody first and then connect..

[@DominickWhelton]

Sounds great!!

[@bencuraza6503]

I’ve been on Grinder but do NOT actually Interact. My IPhone allows Tracking otherwise the App does Not Activate. My question after Deactivating Tracking driving to another Location multiple Different times Gut Instinct tells me Grinder allows Stalking Tracking your Location Intentional UNintentional⁉️Any thoughts in these Comments / Creator.

[@Greenterror]

Love! 😂🪚💣🧨🪓

[@DominickWhelton]

[@Bret121]

I feel better about myself when i keep off the apps some really rude arrogant guys on them

[@alfredbonnabel7022]

U know and I know, these apps are not about finding love. It's about sex and right now. No one wants to meet for drinks first... I am of a certain age where I'd like something more than that.

[@DominickWhelton]

for sure, hooking up the the priority for these hookup apps. But you never know, it could lead to more one day when you're lease expecting it :)

[@adriannuno]

I have been catfished on Grindr before and it was the WORST thing ever. I had no attraction to him whatsoever and he was just so awkward.

[@DominickWhelton]

sorry to hear!

[@mbkmonarch05]

“Weight is not the problem. The problem is that you lied to me.” As a larger guy, I’ve encountered many men who, like you, express this sentiment but who they hook up with/date doesn’t align. I don’t know you personally, so I’m not trying to make this your truth. And by no means am I excusing what that person did. It’s just that the further you get away from the cis, White, in-shape male beauty standards within the community, the more difficult it is to be seen or noticed by the community in person or on apps.

[@alibushell6762]

Your sniffies concern over location isn't so bad - the app doesn't show where you actually are, it puts you up to 2km in a different position than where you actually are.

[@DominickWhelton]

Thats good to know. I just think it can be dangerous if god forbid you have someone tracking you and can see when your home, at the bar, gym, etc :)

[@ianotimelord]

I long to meet someone for a relationship. I agree that going to bars isn't the answer these days.Ive tried apps in the past. Can you find love on grindr? I feel times running out for me being older. Oh I've encountered men who don't match their pic. I'm currently on a few groups on Facebook so, most of the men are fake, as in their profile pic isn't them, or they want ££££

[@DominickWhelton]

dont give up! Apps can be hard, but you never knows whats around the corner :)

[@ianotimelord]

@DominickWhelton Not used them in years....

[@Dragonmoon1598]

On a dating app (free account, haven't bought a membership). I don't think a majority of the men are real . . . I keep getting the same recycled guys:fit, attractive, and looking for long-term/monogamy. How have all these men (around 20. All within the same age group ruffly) not found someone, but still come up on my feed.🙄 Also, when I first joined it (a year ago), I immediately got three likes on the same photo. Guess, conveniently, how "free" likes I had?🙄 So basically, I don't think a lot of dating profiles are real or men are liars and just "expanding" their target range for fun time. Maybe I'd feel different, or it would be different if I had a paid membership, but doubtful. Also, I have gotten additional likes, but it's weirdly always the same two photos. So . . . 🤔

[@DominickWhelton]

Im convinced a lot of these apps just want our money and to not let us actually find and match with real people haha

[@lomanelson9275]

I found a grinder they always want money to get together. I don’t like that it should be free.

[@DominickWhelton]

yeah the app is really expensive if you pay monthly!

[@thomasn6215]

Generally agree with everything you said, but will say that I met my current partner on Grindr almost 4 years ago … so it can happen! Just need to be patient to find the right person. We’re not alone … there are others like us around … just gotta sift through the larger number of crazies or opportunists. Gotta broaden to meet more than just on the apps, but nothing wrong with the apps as just another venue to meet new ppl.

[@DominickWhelton]

happy for you guys!

[@chnalvr]

Fortunately, or unfortunately, I've seen far too many violent crime videos connected to the dating/hook up apps. Between the pandemic and danger lurking online, I've not met up there since before 2020.

[@nicholaskurupas141]

As an older Gay Gentleman, I've 9unfortunately( only encountered scammers, liars and opportunists on several Gay dating apps. Needless to say, I no longer access ANY dating app.

[@treescape]

Same here

[@DominickWhelton]

sorry to hear that was your experience!

[@BobSF94117]

Sniffies location isn't exact. You can set how far "off" you want it to be.

[@janoska2011]

Dominick love you ❤

[@jamesf7602]

I got rid of both apps not just deleted the apps but the accounts as a whole.

[@DominickWhelton]

cheers to a fresh start!

[@michaelvaldez3184]

So i met this guy on a dating app . His photo was a nice face pic 🤔 but it was like 20 years younger . He said he was 50 years old I was ok kool ,but when I met him in person he was actually 60 years old. I’m 44 years I was looking for someone my age or 5 years old not 20 years older.

[@DominickWhelton]

Ugh, sorry! My thing is, were going to find out thats not what you look like soo?? Why lie??

[@michaelvaldez3184]

@ right papi that’s exactly what I was thinking, but I guess he didn’t think I was gonna notice that he looked different. That’s why all my photos are current and I did not use any filters on them.

[@RyanStasolla]

Movie @1:37?

[@DominickWhelton]

The movies shown are "in from the side" and "All of us strangers" :)

[@briankelly85]

I meet gay men in their 80s. and they are still looking for their soulmate. this is just tragic!

[@DominickWhelton]

My heart going out to anyone longing for their soulmate. Especially as time passes

[@charlie619-fz4gv]

❤

[@DominickWhelton]

[@DegrassiInstantStar]

Both apps suck so much!!!

[@DominickWhelton]

haha

[@josephherring3807]

Those apps are very shallow catering to only fleeting encounters. The organic world was the gay bars that had a real vibe. They don't exist much anymore

[@DominickWhelton]

I think you can find real people on both, but can be hard sometimes to weed out all the bad!

[@richard2006carga]

I love you

[@DominickWhelton]

[@adrianbungau3380]

You're adorable

[@greggor_48]

Grindr and A4A are terrible. I keep getting bombarded with advertisements every time I open those apps on my phone. Furthermore, I have encountered individuals on that platform before, it has never ended well or those relationships were short-term. It is typically for sexual encounters, and many of the people on there have partners or are married. Furthermore, the issue of discrimination is exacerbated when individuals use the term "preference" to avoid being labeled as racist or discriminatory.

[@DominickWhelton]

Sorry to hear thats been your experience. And I agree, the ads are out of control! Sending good energy your way that you meet people in a better way :)

[@brokenmarbles70]

I wish they had a sniffies for heterosexuals😢

[@DominickWhelton]

Its called tinder! haha

[@print_Emo.G.Gaymer]

The answer is no.

[@DominickWhelton]

haha

[@briandbenson]

Sniffies is the best! Grindr is okay but not as good. Edit: Met my boyfriend when he chickened out for my maxed-out pump n dump group on Sniffies but we kept chatting through the app and then met up later 1on1. Nice to have a partner who’s sexually compatible with the same kinks ;)

[@mbkmonarch05]

“Weight is not the problem. The problem is that you lied to me.” As a larger guy, I’ve encountered many men who, like you, express this sentiment but who they hook up with/date doesn’t align. I don’t know you personally, so I’m not trying to make this your truth. And by no means am I excusing what that person did. It’s just that the further you get away from the cis, White, in-shape male beauty standards within the community, the more difficult it is to be seen or noticed by the community in person or on apps.

[@robh5517]

❤

[@DominickWhelton]

[@keithfrancisco9712]

❤

[@DominickWhelton]

[@steve701a]

❤

[@DominickWhelton]