My Funny Uber Ride In RESIDENT EVIL

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[@tacticaljunk1608]

Cory was so angry he didn't even notice Chris exploiting her jiggle physics for a solid minute. That's like when your baby is so distraught that it won't respond to jingling keys anymore.

[@knotbots]

Didnt think cory could feel shame or embarrassment lol

[@kingcrab1774]

He's an incredible actor

[@0zero0zero39]

I feel that cory can only feel shame and embarrassment on other people's behalf.

[@necromech_]

@@0zero0zero39he occasionally becomes lucid, but 9/10 he's completely self-assured in his degeneracy. he aware enough to know he's too far gone to go back, and just committed to the death spiral

[@DrewPickles69]

I vaguely remember a Sleepycabin episode where they were talking about Cory loudly screaming in a restaurant about DBZ.

[@kingstarscream320]

Corey’s social anxiety seems genuine, but it is strangely selective.

[@spencerm5612]

Amazing how Dave makes Cory look like the rational one

[@harrywilson-wright473]

I like how tomar has been dead on the floor this whole series and no-one brings it up

[@BigScreamingBaby]

Well they haven't noticed him yet.

[@harrywilson-wright473]

@@BigScreamingBaby i think corey was gonna bring it up at somepoint but chris gave him "the stare"

[@DonManuelConLeonsJacket]

That's not Tomar 🤭 that's just a rug laol

[@ulfhedinn79]

I didn't even know he was sick

[@reeetawd]

No Tomar just sleeps like that. He eats a bunch of jam before bed so he has sweet dreams. It's not blood.

[@Corner.Spider]

Dave and Corey bicker like an old married couple 😂

[@500mandarin]

Well Cory is dating a man so...

[@DonManuelConLeonsJacket]

​@@500mandarin yeah, but 2 men don't bicker as much as 2 vomen do jeje

[@Fatherharu]

​@@500mandarin Are you serious? lol

[@500mandarin]

@@Fatherharu It's not some huge secret dude

[@reeetawd]

Dave and Cory are a good pair but I'd love to hear an episode with just Chris, Corey, and Adam and have them play roblox or somthing stupid like that so Adam complain and Corey and Dave can go "No it's not stupid Adam it's cool."

[@lowhp_comic]

Uber Driver: DAVID! HANGING OUT WITH LITTLE COREY IN SPANDEX I SEE!"

[@jormilos]

I LOVE YOU DAVEY, BUT YOU CAN'T BE DOING THAT, COME ON

[@Turian_Hustle]

😂

[@DonkeyKongJr]

ÆŪGH

[@Silver..]

*proceeds to drink pepsi piss*

[@Quavalin]

Dave getting called dumb by the crazy uber guy is perfect karma. People always seem to forget that pretending to be stupid looks no different from being actually stupid

[@ididgt4259]

Yeah I'm sure that really got to him, he really got to liking that guy

[@GrayD_Fox]

It had to hurt worse after he says “you think they wouldn’t think of that?”

[@JustapErson]

Points to whoever else knew what the guy's skin colour was from this comment alone

[@durleywanger2801]

@@JustapErson I immediately knew he was chinese

[@MrTehWurld]

@@JustapErson what an incredibly stupid thing to say.

[@nostromo9743]

My niece got done bit by a crimson-head.

[@JoseTV]

You had a niece that died??

my bruther got decapitated by a hunter

[@jameson7276]

Mah zombie went sour

[@darklordstan6154]

"Nobody cares about your niece, right now. We almost died ourselves."- a crimson-head

[@turkeysamwich00]

and died because of it

[@reeetawd]

Chris starting it out strong with the President evil joke

[@Archonus]

Biden be hidin' his search history

[@kriegcore]

It was so good

[@BidenisPed0Peter]

C'mon, man.

[@crazyBloodmonkey]

i like how the barely even addressed that they put jill in the cop costume. like it's been 2 months and this series comes back and then suddenly she's just dressed like that. that was just really goofy.

[@PapaLuge]

Fr i thought i was being gaslit because noone was talking about it xD

[@crazyBloodmonkey]

@@PapaLuge if you think that's gaslighting. Wait til you find out that oneyplays isn't real Chris has just been uploading random static for years.

[@ember4303]

i for one welcome the change

[@startown4814]

i spent like five minutes looking through the recent resident evil playthroughs thinking i missed one where they put her in the Halloween cop costume

[@KeanuRhys01]

19:37 ‘we were trying to get Sonic 06 to work.’ Remember these words

[@MrZip420]

you know Dave could just say ''"sorry I don't want to talk'' instead of gaslighting a potential serial killer

[@ixl911ixl]

Dave genuinely does not seem to understand that Corey isn’t saying, “It’s not polite to gas light strangers”. What he’s really saying is, “People are fucking unhinged and you’re potentially putting our lives at risk by antagonizing this person.” It’s fear and self preservation, not respect. Lol. And I agree 100%.

[@Vaguer_Weevil]

​@@ixl911ixl It could be both. I don't see the point in fucking with people you don't know regardless of whether they're dangerous or not.

[@G-Mastah-Fash]

@@ixl911ixl Yeah the best way to deal with a potentially dangerous person is to be stoic and unassuming. Not to be annoying as hell.

[@seamusthatsthedog4819]

@@ixl911ixl Consider that Dave might have zero self preservation instincts. It do be like that sometimes.

[@grimdara4227]

Dave is funny as fuck but yeah I wouldn't potentially want to be beaten to shit inside someone else's car for that. Sometimes you think you're being subtle by being smart but a lot of people pick up on that easier than you'd think.

[@OSSOYT]

They need to bring that Uber driver as a fourth member

[@ThouArtEverywhereAndNowhere]

Watch the Kristen Bell and Rick Glassman bit where the UberEats/Postmates driver literally climbs onto his apartment balcony and then Rick wants to have him on as a guest

[@FandralStar]

(No hate at all) I love that Cory (and Dave) can argue about a single event for an entire episode XD I saw the title and was like "Wow, I can't believe they named it after a single joke" but then I watched it...this truly is the strange uber episode.

[@shanemiller1182]

Tiny Hitler-core

[@Archonus]

Dave: "It's not weird!" Also Dave: *does something extremely weird*

[@Kevin-irish]

When you look down the side of couch and find your lost episode.

[@MeAuntieNora]

"I feel like there's a gray clown in the room right now" is a solid new Coryism.

[@BearShare69]

thought he said cloud

[@HawtDawg420]

Jill's *always* worn that outfit. Are you okay, man? ~ Nelson Mandela

[@nicholaskoob2894]

Corey calling someone else out for not thinking before acting is pretty surreal.

[@rc9145]

The image of Ray Skywalker getting her head punched in and snoring on the floor is so funny to me

[@gishigoshi]

Lmao this series started for Halloween. We are now midway through April

[@bluemilkalienmonster522]

Maybe it’ll keep going until Halloween 2024?

[@moonrockmuncher]

I love dave and cory episodes so I’m very glad it’s carried into April lol

[@afx3]

It's the gift that keeps on giving.

[@tek3576]

Yeah these have been coming out slow as hell. I wonder if these are more recent recordings that they're editing right after. Thought they prepared weeks in advance

[@asabovesobelow1362]

Well there's like a half hour left worth of gameplay so it should take Chris like 2/3 episodes to finish.

[@Juiceboxdan72]

That dollar bill 9/11 thing is actually done by folding a $20 bill a certain way (it makes an image that looks like the towers, and when you turn it over it looks like the pentagon). It was sort of popular in like 2003 I think lol

[@johnnymccraze]

You know it’s bad when Cory is making perfectly logical sense in his side of an argument.

[@Abysmii]

This has to be one of the most unhinged Dave and Corey interactions and I'm loving it.

[@evrynameistaken5]

dave not thinking there'd be repercussions for blasting nsfw audio at a service worker in their car probably shouldn't be admitted publicly

[@Coldkill2001]

its not nsfw audio, its a Malaysian dub

[@TatumGrace-kw5eu]

It's a joke no need to bitch

[@flashmozzg]

@@Coldkill2001 I wouldn't watch Malaysian dub at work.

[@kingstarscream320]

What repercussions?

[@Vaguer_Weevil]

​@@kingstarscream320 Obviously they're talking about the stampede of overweight girls immediately flocking to him, what else?

[@pjbutton3396]

“Thank God my Uber driver isn’t homophobic, he’s just misogynistic. 5 stars!”

[@Tom-jy6mc]

I don't know about calling him misogynistic, but he does sounds like one of those weird guys that watches nerd ragebait channels that exclusively whine about star wars 30 times a week

[@kaj7135]

@@Tom-jy6mcLess cringe than whining about people who whine about star wars.

[@Tom-jy6mc]

@@kaj7135 didn't mean to push your buttons lol

[@kaj7135]

@@Tom-jy6mc World class projection.

[@Tom-jy6mc]

@@kaj7135 couldn't think of a better response? Was this really that important you had to say something?

[@LomaGnome]

3:58 "these people" -Cory

[@n2oshotandironman]

This ain't sleepy cast. He can't say it here.

[@TheQwertyuiop6]

Reaching much?

[@LomaGnome]

@@TheQwertyuiop6 Joke identified. Congrats to the group of 6 keyboard shaped melons.

[@n2oshotandironman]

@@TheQwertyuiop6 Erm, reaching much? Erm, like, source?

[@explosivesexplode]

@@n2oshotandironman dont cuss please

[@TheZbobcat]

I think the Uber driver turned the tables on Dave and was messing with him about the Last Jedi

[@deanb0t]

why’d they make jill so damn HOT I CANT EVEN PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT THEYRE SAYING

[@CrisisMoon7]

Gooner brain

[@Chibblechabble]

She’s a beautiful goddess

[@gamewizardthesecond]

When did they equip this skin?

[@harpernicholson1]

Gooner brain

[@oliverholm3973]

I love that when Dave gets really into a story, he starts eating chicken nuggets while talking lol

[@Juiceboxdan72]

I appreciate how Chris was admiring Jill's bum bum while Cory and Dave did their thing lol

[@DanielDangerous]

Mmm, bum

[@absolutelynothing7452]

Dave fucking with the schizophrenic taxi driver is giving me an anxiety attack

[@seanhoey5939]

The fact that he doesn’t understand why it even makes Cory nervous is both hilarious and frightening.

[@jFar920]

One of my friends from high school told me all this same shit word for word too among other insane nonsense. He told me Obama was gonna have us in concentration camps by 2014. Of course when I brought it back up later he denied that. I saw him the other day and his wife was going on about the Mandela affect, the apocalypse and living in a simulation

[@TripleKiwi]

@@seanhoey5939 i, too, do not see the issue

[@Baron_Drachen]

Dave is definitely **DK noises**

[@Slimebeast]

NGL, the Uber Driver sounds like Zach fucking with them in an elaborate costume.

[@JPTQJR]

What happened to good ol' earbuds? Could've avoided the Vegeta gay sex debacle if he just wore earbuds Even if he wore earbuds he'd still look like a weirdo asking about Mario on an Uber ride 😂

[@TheMrsmartass13]

At 14:10 Dave turns into Adam for a second, are we sure they're not the same guy?

[@estebanss4]

The uber guy was fucking with them, no way he doesn't know about the I'm your father scene

[@DullVivid]

Just because I'm paying for a delicious nutritious low-calorie meal at McDonald's with only the freshest ingredients doesn't mean I should stand in line and play Scary Halloween Farts Vol 11 on my shitty Samsung Galaxy J7 for all to hear.

[@stanko00001]

J7 was my first smartphone. Absolute dog shit.

[@moonsys]

Maybe you should start enjoying your life

[@luckys901]

Dave thought he was being a funny lil troll boy but the driver actually 193 iqd with a reverse troll

[@TinkersKustomPaintball]

"It's out of respect for the person" Says Corey being the least respectful person in the room with his belligerent ass 😅

[@CadetGen]

Can Cory contain David's Super Spectrum Saiyan level in the next ride share? Will Dave play louder foreign moaning dub compilations? Find out nect time in House of Beck Z

[@saturniidspectre]

Is Dave a centipede with a human head?

[@flusterdouglas9326]

25:12 Corey: " Is that f'd up to say?" Dave (who spent the first 10 minutes of this video talking about how he enjoys gaslighting people who say stupid and terrible things): "no, that's one million percent normal"

[@TheCuriousRover]

This episodes starts off with insane situations so fast I barely have time to switch my brain into oneyplays watching mode.

[@Arceedos]

Tom's so fuckin cool. I messaged him on my old newgrounds account asking to get a name change before it was a thing and the chad went and did it himself.

[@shizzlebizzfizz]

It seems that Dave has not learned his lesson from the brick fight

[@caiosoares2834]

Or the Crazy Taxi incident.

[@TRSRM]

"All I do is ask my Ubers if they like Super Mario Bros or not" the shroom dealer Dave plot thickens

[@zacharydalton9936]

Dave you can’t watch porn in an Uber or taxi, they convict that for sexual assault lol.

[@Dudebromanbro88]

So glad they came back to it

[@Bungowumperpuss]

I’m tired of Cory and Dave airing out their disgustingly sinful relationship. They should read Leviticus and take it to heart.

[@pip5188]

8:38 I love that Cory knows about Fujitive memes

[@loosenoose]

This seems like a fine place to tell a terrible Uber DRIVER story. I drive rideshare. A few years ago, before Corona, I was working a crap job. Job. After I got off shift for the night, I still had a lot of energy and stuff. It was like 10:00 or 11:00 p.m.. I figured I would go out and Uber for a little while. My third ride in, wound up being this massive intimidating looking dude. Guy looked like he was about 8 ft tall, wearing a long trench coat and dark sunglasses, and carrying a duffel bag that was big enough to have a person in it. The guy looked like the black Terminator. I started the ride in the app, and I saw that he was going to Galveston Island. That's about an hour and a half to 2 hours of driving from where we were. I told the guy I needed to stop and get some gas real quick. He seemed polite at least, telling me that he understands and thanking me for taking him on that long trip. I paid for my gas at the pump and he sat in the car while I was filling up. When I got back in the car, I could smell marijuana. The smell was very, very strong. This made me really nervous. This was also in the final days of Mardi gras. I was scared that I had THE WEED MAN in my car. I did not want the weed man in my car. I was also worried for my safety. As an Uber driver I've had guns pulled on me. People don't give a crap in Houston. I try to be smart about it. I try not to upset my passengers. Anyways, I was a little nervous, but I wanted to bring up the issue of the smell. I told the guy I didn't want to know what he had in the bag, and that I really didn't want to smell it. He said it was a small amount for personal use. With shock in my voice, I mentioned the size of the duffel bag. He laughed and told me that he had a small Ziploc bag for his weed, and that the duffel bag was filled with gay sex toys and that I was taking him to a gay orgy on the island. Then he asked if I'm into dudes. I told him I'm not. He said either way, there was a couch I could crash on there, if I wanted to spend the night. He added that he could pay me cash for a ride home in the morning. I thanked him and politely declined his offer, saying that I really should be back in my own bed and get some sleep before I have to be back at work later in the morning. Tldr, the black Terminator was going to a gay sex party on Galveston Island

[@DrHeinzy]

And you wimped out? You could have had your guts turbed inside out 😊

[@loosenoose]

@@DrHeinzy getting impaled in every hole didn't seem all that fun at the time. I also don't make it a habit of going into or sleeping at the homes of my passengers, no matter how crazy their stories or situations are

[@ginogatash4030]

That didn't sound bad at all, the guy seemed pretty chill all things considered, were you worried cause weed is illegal there?

[@coraert]

If there's ever a 'best of telling stories volume 2', this episode would need to be in it fully

[@ayeg-dp5to]

i drive uber full time and i honestly wish everyone would just stay quiet and let me drive lol

[@LeviathansGrotto]

Anyone else a little.....................distracted by the outfit Jill is wearing?

[@iNCoMpeTeNtplAyS]

Distracted? I'm at full attention!

[@cruddnow]

Yeah the beret's always kinda been distracting

[@deadbodiesandgraveyardsoil]

I’m kinda…a virgin

[@ginogatash4030]

What are you talking about? She always wore that outfit don't worry.

[@oldgenesys7886]

Thank for giving Jill the outfit she deserves and support all gamers

[@Spartan_echo]

2:09 oneyplays when my mom walks in the room

[@RasmusKudahl]

Corys rambling about affection at the end is gold

[@xMirukanis]

Can someone tell them that what he is talking about is simply a love language and not that deep 😭

[@revolutionaryfoxinist2377]

One of the funniest and realist of his rants tbh, 10/10

[@BIGBOYGAMING03]

​@@xMirukanisnah Cory's a creep

[@xMirukanis]

@@BIGBOYGAMING03 I think he exaggerated bro. I wouldn’t want a man like that but some people don’t have physical touch as their love language

[@TheREALBadpun]

The Portuguese Vegeta dub is so good I'm glad Dave played it at full volume in an uber

[@ginogatash4030]

I'm glad Corey thought it was Malaysian, tho I guess you wouldn't really fact check that information in that situation.

[@lukascraft6344]

Errrm Jill valentine? More like Tomar filled her with slime.

[@AnuxeL]

I side with Dave. Sometimes you have to meet crazy people on their level

[@DaveDavis-f9w]

And when they beat your ass, you completely deserve it. 🤷‍♂

[@wogartz1115]

My mind was blown when Cory spilled all the secrets to formulating the Philosopher's Goon in this episode. Most of us have to spend decades in the hermetic order to learn those truths.

[@MunicipalityCity]

Hermes Jizzmagistus

[@Ajax-322]

You know it's bad when Cory is the voice of reason

[@BBB_bbb_BBB]

I agree with Dave, everytime I'm stuck talking to a crazy guy I egg them on, let them keep talking. It's hilarious.

[@ginogatash4030]

It sounds funny until you fuck with the one psycho that actually kills you, it's too high risk.

[@KE-yq2eg]

Am I missing an episode? I don't remember Jill wearing that.

[@doomhowar]

I don't either but it's a welcome addition.

[@jamesrussell2936]

I think right at the end of the last episode her outfit got stained with cheese sauce and ketchup and that was the only thing laying around.

[@thehawk8332]

Ah gaming of the 2000s. I wish I was alive around the time.

[@jormilos]

Looks like it's a mod. Found it on Nexus. Apparently a costume from the DS version

[@gamewizardthesecond]

When Dave does it its bad But when Zach messes with crazy people its fine? Smh

[@joshuahughes4704]

We live in a society

[@matt-dr4fk]

Well it's because we all know Zach has plot armor but Dave is totally fair game for dying in a later season.

[@MG-ql8sg]

The guy who’s talking about how he could punch Rey in the back of the head is so unironically right lol

[@TheVOODOO271]

I never believe Oney when he says they're going to finish it but damn I'm glad there's more

[@Desparil]

For some reason, series that include Cory have an extremely high completion rate.

[@TheVOODOO271]

@@Desparil y'think his tism locks Chris in and he knows he'll never win against Cory's whine?

[@rojo3031]

Cory haters mad for the 25th time

[@bulletbill5977]

I'm too addicted to stop now.

[@oreo507]

How can u hate cory? He's such a lovable dumbo

[@oisinmurphy8242]

Cory realists

[@TheMrsmartass13]

​@@oreo507it's cause people see themselves subconsciously in cory and get pissed lol

[@thehawk8332]

Cory is cool.

[@lukapilli6402]

Loving that the guys keep the ghost of tomar around after his unfortunate death in 2018

[@I_MDB]

As a medical illustrator ie, drawing posters of organs and muscles, this was a very fun little puzzle for chris. I love u chris

[@SteveSorex]

Guys look up Portuguese Vegeta moaning - it's even funnier

[@goatfood1504]

Your name is an anagram for sex vetoers

[@knotbots]

Jill...baby

[@Plaguenide]

19:50 Sony does that for the people that own those PS3s that didn't have WiFi, or those that do have it but are starting to fail.

[@HankGreenburg]

I love how unhinged Dave is on uber rides. We need more of these stories

[@mikemccoy7931]

Most sane Corey takes ever, not going to lie.

[@Desparil]

I clapped my feet together like a big baby when I saw a new Resident Evil upload

[@TheSyliman]

Dave is the worst kind of Uber passenger. And I've never been in an uber.

[@ixl911ixl]

I’ve never identified with Corey so hard in my life. You do not antagonize or egg on crazy people. You politely nod and you gtfo of there. People are fucking scary.

[@bitty_beastly47]

Is every Uber driver is crazy??

[@haiperbus]

SNORE live a little

[@NausicaaRaine]

I loved 100% of the Uber talk omfg this is gold

[@snerttt]

The covid movie lmao

[@Buffy111000]

I think their uber driver was fucking with them

[@JoseTV]

You can't gaslight the gaslighter

[@Buffy111000]

@@JoseTV he's Gason Bourne

[@GeneralConobi]

@@Buffy111000 gassin' bourne, born to gas

[@ginogatash4030]

I think you have too high expectations for the average American.

[@KyleVoices]

Dave acting like a douche plus Chris aimlessly wandering around not knowing what to do makes watching this so frustrating. Saying that, it’s pleasantly surprising that Cory is the voice of reason for once.

[@RallyLancer95]

Dave is really fortunate to have found employment at Newgrounds. Between getting fired from McDonald's and this Uber incident I don't think he would survive in the real world

[@jacobpidgeon962]

The irony of Dave denying the predictive programming then saying “it’s kinda weird how in this game the virus spreads and nobody does anything about it for like three months”

[@gaddiusgaddium9082]

14:05 to be fair, they spent a movie and a half setting Finn up as a stormtrooper/jedi and scrapped it for "muh girl power". I'm all for baddass females like Ripley but Ray is literally a Mary Sue.

[@Thestrange14928]

The uber driver story is just a potential smiling friends episode.

[@booates]

uber man is making sense to me

[@ginogatash4030]

Least unhinged Oneyplays fan honestly.

[@Necromortus]

After this uber story, my appreciation of Dave as a person has plummeted, and somehow Cory seems more normal for a change.

[@WolfEffectzz]

i think you need to go out more

[@zzzzzzz88]

I'm sure Dave is heartbroken by this news.

[@bitty_beastly47]

Nah, it's fun to mess with strangers

[@GrayD_Fox]

don’t be ridiculous

[@Necromortus]

@bitty_beastly47 Sure is. All I'm saying is, if I was driving someone and they started playing moaning sounds on full volume, I'd look directly into that person's eyes and start aggressively moaning like a gorilla, see how they like it.

[@Stealitnot]

Best of Uber rides coming up!

[@n2oshotandironman]

This Uber driver sounds so based.

[@BrandonHP]

Thanks for the eye candy, Chris.

[@WobinOfYlisse]

Amateur gaslighters when they meet a real gaslighter

[@Generaider]

Them talking about Dave fucking with the uber drivers made me flashback to the sleepycabin ep where jontron & zach were telling their story about zach messing with the korean cab driver in new york

[@hodoupmer]

THEY DIDNT FORGET IM SO HAPPY

[@nightweeb]

I was listening to this in the background while working this morning and didn't realize until I had to pause that they modded Jill's outfit and gaslight me into thinking "Was she modded the whole series and I never noticed" because I usually listen to these in the background.

[@SnackCakes]

Dave's the kinda guy you gotta apologize to others for.

[@PyckledNyk]

Who knew we’d get like 6 months of content out of this game?

[@ShahbazBokhari]

I am 4 minutes in and Corey is the most socially astute perspective in this discussion and now I am terrified of Dave. Also.. John… ada… mole..? 😱

[@Mrz-bq2yb]

Dave makes Corey sound sane somehow

[@poopsiepup1192]

Dave is just too big time now to empathize with arcade workers and uber drivers

[@Gutter-Friend]

What's the arcade worker story

[@DaveDavis-f9w]

lol good one

[@matt-dr4fk]

​@Gutter-Friend the guy who refuses to increase the volume on the DDR machine they were using. Except the guy is a total asshole who just doesn't want to do his job

[@rish1656]

Dave walked FRIDAY NIGHT FUNKIN up on stage, who the hell are you?!