My Husband Caught me Cheating, But Didn't Expect Him To Do This!--

[@poesiamoderna]

“Jay was a good person” said she, about a man who went after a woman that he KNEW was married and had a son 😂😂

[@Chaos_God_of_Fate]

Good People bang in Public all the time too, so ya, he's extra good.

[@xXT560Xx]

Jay was not a good person - no morals or ethics

[@ShapelessIsle]

@@Chaos_God_of_Fate lol. That is funny.

[@abcdefzhij]

It's not his problem if someone else cheats with him lol

[@poesiamoderna]

@@abcdefzhij Not a good mindset to have. It's true that she is the one that was worse in this situation, but there are two reasons why the guy shouldn't do it as well. First of all, he knew that he would probaly destroy a entire family. If you have any kind of empathy in your heart, you know how important families are and how difficult they are to build. Destroying an entire family, possibily causing trauma for the husband and the child and making their lives more difficult for at least a few years just because you are in lust is horrible and pathetic. Secondly, you never know how the husband will react. In this case he luckly didn't react with violence, but when husbands do react with violence, usually the lover dies, the husband goes to jail and the wife comes out unscathed. Let's just say that if her husband pointed a gun at him, a few seconds before the end he would realise how her cheating with him was his problem. If you go out with someone that has a partner and that person didn't tell you that, then shit happens i suppose, even though you could probably do some research to find that out beforehand, but knowingly going after a married woman is about as low as a man can get.

[@nikobellic4203]

There's no "kinda" for cheating. It's either you cheated, or you're faithful. No in between.

[@Mboy245]

A while back I saw a post on Facebook that mentioned "mistakenly" cheating. I said in a comment that there is no such thing. There isn't. There is no accidental cheating. As you said and I said in my Facebook comment. You either are faithful or you cheat. There's no middle ground. You make the choice to cheat. It can't accidentally happen as it is a choice. My comment seemed to piss a few people off who then proceeded to tell me the "fallacy" of my statement. Thankfully there were a lot of people who agreed with me and came to my aid.

[@Mboy245]

I agree completely with you. You hit the nail on the head

[@Nameless82284]

Even if "kind of cheated" was a thing, this was not it. She has been having been sleeping around for a long time every chance she gets. That's not "kind of cheating" that's just straight up cheating. "Kind of cheating" would be like if Jay kissed her, she kissed him back but then she pulled out and never contact him again. That's "kind of cheating"

[@MrSqurk]

@@Nameless82284it seems like some people don’t believe it’s cheating until they fall in love with the other person.

[@Nameless82284]

@@MrSqurk That too. I heard cheaters say "It was just sex, okay! It didn't mean anything! I don't love them, I love you." They say that like they don't count it as cheating because they don't like the person they cheated with

[@Xeritium]

Boy... even when trying to be accountable... she STILL blames her husband lmao... wild. You played a stupid game, lady.

[@TheJarlath9]

fr blames him like woman be happy this dude didn't break your face

[@wanglee21]

Sounds like my ex-wife. lol Victimhood is their strongest still set

[@XxRazienxX]

She's also blaming her job and her boss; "my boss wanted me to be friendly", "we had to land this client", "we needed the business", bla bla bla, excuses excuses. She wanted this and she just regrets the consequences now.

[@JohnSmith-bs9ym]

She's for the streets.

[@markthomson1816]

The amount of gaslighting she does to try to absolve her shirty guilt is unbelievable

[@carlasghost656]

Fully believable and sadly average among a lot of women.

[@YourManifoldWorld]

Gaslighting is all women do to wiggle out of responsibility. Just listen carefully and you will realize literally ALL women do it. ALL of them. You sister, your cousin, your mom, your grandmother. I mean ALL. You just have to pay attention and listen when they speak after doing something wrong.

[@dakodabarr9646]

The way this conflict could have been so easily resolved through communication makes this sound like a Shakespearean play😂

[@NoNo-xh7ru]

⁠​⁠​⁠@@Aj.6500I can’t even blame this on poor communication anymore. A fucking monkey has enough communication skills to tell you when it isn’t happy with a situation granted you take the time to try and understand it. It’s an issue of people being entitled morons who expect everyone else to read their mind. And as you said, therapy. You could both be blind and deaf and a good therapist will still find a way to bridge a gap between people.

[@michaelalaniz7407]

What’s this slahespearean dms? Let’s ask if it is

[@eleethtahgra7182]

No. She could seduce him. She should seduce him. Shes h0rny? Then she ought to seduce him. But no.

[@opentoopen]

it is the responsibility of the husband to take care of the spouses needs, but she cheated. it is indeed a moral dilemma. it;s not like he couldn't make those changes before the divorce. he just didn't bother to. if i had to guess, he fell out of love, and wife cheating was conveniently there. i wouldn't be surprised if he was cheating himself with beth lol.

[@freds4]

@@opentoopen see that's just you making things easy for yourself and making her the victim. Lets be very honest here now shall we, he wasn't caught cheating it was her. So whether you like it or not it was her fault and the biggest mistake of her was not to communicate this to him, then go off on a random client. from what i can see she is going to set herself up for further misery by actually cosigning the full custody. She was an idiot; what's stopping the husband from filling up theirs sons head with cheating and half truth and how she doesn't care about him. It would be extremely easy to do so once he turns 15 to 16 years old. Cuz he will start hating cheaters and he can fill up his head with half truth and things of she left so that she can fuck other guys and blah blah stuff its stupid of her

[@ncd2164]

So…. Instead of communicating like a sane human would she went STRAIGHT TO CHEATING! Well done op! You deserve nothing in life 😊

[@clintshidwood4511]

So... instead of actually having a relationship with wife where you talk, have date nights, bump uglies etc the mans went STRAIGHT TO FARMING GOLD AT THE OFFICE 24/7! well done op's ex husband, you didnt fug your wife for 6 months so she went and got fug from someone else. You deserve a shitty marriage when neither of you are putting in ANY effort into it 8==D

[@rhaeasoul8531]

Yeah; if she’s lucky she has like 5 or six more years with her son before he starts to ask questions that his dad will answer.

[@whatteamwildcats4033]

It's not even that - she did at least ask her husband what was up and he told her nothing. Despite the fact that, that wasnt true and she should have pushed the issue. Ok. Your husband won't screw you, and that passes you off. A vibrator costs like 30 dollars cheep. Sis couldn't get 30 dollars

[@relics2397]

​@@whatteamwildcats4033 What she did was wrong but what her husband did was wrong too. He neglected her and their marriage. In biblical terms, you're supposed to cling to your sponse and be regularly intimate to prevent sin from tempting you. Her husband's neglect drove her to sin. I usually think that it's inexcusable and to a degree, I still think that but this is one of those times where you have to look at the bigger picture to see that he's responsible for things getting to this point too.

[@whatteamwildcats4033]

@@relics2397 oh no I get that. He shouldn't be pressures into sex when he doesn't want to - its not neglect to not have sex. What he is guilty of, and I will give op some points for it, is refusing to communicate with her as well. According to op she did ask if something was wrong, and he gave her nothing to work with. From there op never said she tried again to communicate, and her entire issue really was that he wouldn't have sex with her. But if she doesn't care to keep trying to get to the bottom of what was wrong, why should he care to be intimate again. Edit: if you have a problem with me saying the husband is guilty of shutting down on op - *leave me alone*. I'm not altering my statement or changing it to make you feel comfortable and I'm litterally admitting op was the one mostly at fault. Why are yall targeting me when relics2397 is litterally saying it's his fault in entirely? Like fuck off

[@mtheory3]

She sounds like she was more upset about the consequences of her cheating than the actual cheating itself

[@adamschaefer881]

Because she enjoyed the cheating, the consequences, not so much.

[@burningsinner1132]

Because she clearly stated that having affair with Jay while having provider on the side were the things alligning with her plans?

[@brutustantheiii8477]

SHE WAS. She deserves EVERYTHING SHE GOT

[@strider112575]

She had a million excuses as to why it was her husband's fault. Every time she even came close to admitting fault, she would deflect to him not caring

[@godnyx117]

Sad, but this is how people with no values and respect are. They regret the consequences and not been more careful and not their actual actions.

[@rogaldornthefortified6404]

literally she could have just talked and waited for the circumstances to change for whatever dead bedroom situation to blow over. Not only did she seek the arms of somebody else. She actively chose to neglect the proper course of action continuously right up until she did the thing she couldn’t ever revoke. Play a stupid game. Win a stupid prize

[@Fire-Manz]

She did try to sort of talk to him in the beginning and he brushed her off. Although, she still shouldn't have cheated. I do agree with you with the other parts though but I wouldn't put 100% blame on OP this time. I give her 90% blame since she literally could just do an actual talk, be honest about what's going on, tell husband to dial back since dead bedroom is a major cause of relationships ending.

[@Rookinton]

@@Fire-Manz "Hey, what's going on?" is not enough with what she was feeling and dealing with. If she felt lonely and needed affection and intimacy with her husband, then why be subtle about talking about it? All she had to do was tell him that she understands he's working hard to provide, but she misses him emotionally and in the bedroom and that it has really been digging at her lately. With that, the ball would be entirely on his side and he would be the one who had provide answers and solutions. If he instead said that he didn't care then the whole situation would've gone way differently, instead of her loosing the moral ground by cheating cause she didn't bother to voice her feelings to her husband.

[@yRaven.]

​@@Fire-Manz If someone cheats there's no extra. Don't like how your relationship is going? Show on your actions you want a change, treat your SO the best you can, if nothing changes then it's truly dead, get a divorce. Instead she choose to cheat, blame is 100% on her.

[@Fire-Manz]

@@yRaven. The cheating is all on her but problems in a relationship isn't is what I'm saying. All she had to do is put her foot down and explain, if he chose to ignore her after that she should have just broke it off. No, she chose the easy way out without giving her marriage, partner, or anything a real chance. She did try a little in the beginning but fell off, then found an excuse to cheat,

[@reflex9238]

@@Fire-Manz Regardless of what was happening with her husband cheating was never the answer, if that much was enough to get to cheat then she should've just gone for the divorce option. Honestly, that confuses me she wanted to only stay married because of her son, but cheating was only going to hurt her son in the long run and plus its not like she would've been able to hide it forever, at that point she should've just gone for the divorce option and if that was such a big decision for her then she really should've tried harder to try and get the relationship to still work such as actually being an adult and try to communicate with her husband and tell him she wanted to seriously talk to him. I'll even entertain the idea of the husband not wanting to tell and continuing to be neglectful, at that point going through a divorce would've been a lot less painful than the blowout that would've happened once he figured out she was cheating. The ironic thing being the reason she even chose to stay married ie to keep her son, ended up being taken away from her because of her cheating and again its not like she was doing her son any favors with that. Only thing I can give the OP is that they at least seem to take much greater responsibility than any other cheater story I've seen.

[@CrystallizedBlood1]

"Jay was a good person." Ma'am, he knowingly flirted and slept with a married woman and did not care about the harm it would cause to your husband or your son. He is anything but.

[@mrblue703]

Translates like "Jay's dik was good."

[@Takuradiorr]

😂​@@mrblue703

[@Sahil24980]

Frr​@@mrblue703

[@rhaeasoul8531]

There’s no such thing as “kinda” cheating in a relationship. You’re either faithful or you’re not.

[@Mboy245]

A while back I saw a post on Facebook that mentioned "mistakenly" cheating. I said in a comment that there is no such thing. There isn't. There is no accidental cheating. As you said and I said in my Facebook comment. You either are faithful or you cheat. There's no middle ground. You make the choice to cheat. It can't accidentally happen as it is a choice. My comment seemed to piss a few people off who then proceeded to tell me the "fallacy" of my statement. Thankfully there were a lot of people who agreed with me and came to my aid.

[@Nameless82284]

Even if "kinda cheating" existed, this was not it. She has been sleeping around with Jay for a long time every time she gets the chance. That's not "kinda cheating" that's just straight up cheating. "Kinda cheating" would be if Jay pulled her to kiss him and she kissed him back before realizing what she did and pulled away. That's "kinda cheating"

[@rhaeasoul8531]

And never once did she ever mention trying to have a serious talk with her husband before jumping right into cheating. Hope she enjoys her sons childhood becuase soon enough he’ll ask questions and it sounds like the kids dad will be happy to answer every one of them.

[@JoseRamirez-gs1pw]

@@Nameless82284not so Mmm z kkk h

[@derkonig2292]

@@Nameless82284 that too, if they had done something drunk. That way, it would be cheating, but they would not be in the right mind while drunk, so it can be excused(I won't but some people may). That can be called "kinda cheating"

[@swiney2279]

So the man who worked his ass off to provide for his family is the bad guy, but the man who knowingly slept with another man's wife is a good man?

[@razofdead]

In her point of view… I believe she the wife was treating husband bad…

[@J.P_INC.]

Hold up,woman can use the "im too tired "excuse but men cant? 😂😂

[@thatoneguy9816]

No. You have a penis. You’re aren’t allowed to be tired.

[@flamingrage100]

You already know how it is

[@J.P_INC.]

@@flamingrage100lol. I always tell men to stop acting like banks and walking wallets or women will start seeing as such and you will be in this situation lol

[@fidgetdestroyer3117]

I never even thought of that

[@J.P_INC.]

@@fidgetdestroyer3117 I did 😂. From work,oh oh my back lmao

[@JonnyRobbed]

Four minutes in and non stop preemptively pointing the finger at others for her cheating.

[@clintshidwood4511]

as if anything short of a kowtow at you your feet and a "im a dirty little whore who deserves eternal anguish and misery. please, a thousand lashings for my back, mr Jimmy Legs, and a thousand more for my front" would be considered adequate repentance by your kind. both these people threw their marriage away. but ye sure, woman bad because she gave context about cracks in her marital life before the affair. she should have have made a one sentence post where there is no backstory or updates or plot. nothing. just a bare bone confession and then a prompt self delete

[@JonnyRobbed]

@@clintshidwood4511 sounds like you're reading more into my comment than what was there. Maybe this one hit you a little too personally, or maybe your reply was meant for a different comment? Regardless, best of luck with whatever you're dealing with.

[@TheSm1thers]

​@@clintshidwood4511 Imagine hating the opposite gender so much that you bend over backwards to defend cheating...

[@deadwooddooley3202]

@@clintshidwood4511hoes mad, there’s no good reason for adultery, smooth brain

[@gibblets17]

@@clintshidwood4511 its not that at all. she isn't actually taking responsibility for her actions and it shows. she is constantly "subtly" pointing fingers. every time she says she was in the wrong its followed by or after a bunch of self justifications. Cheating isn't a whoops a daisy. its not a mistake. its a calculated decision to betray. its a decision that a cheater makes over and over and over. lies manipulations and showing throughout it all that they feel no remorse using their spouse against their will. Not being down to be cuddly and sexual with your spouse isn't a betrayal. its dropping the ball. letting your self and spouse down. cheating is just betrayal. plain and simple.

[@phillramirez8323]

😂 still blames the husband for her goof-ness🤣

[@clintshidwood4511]

i dont think blame is the right word. she provided context to show that she didn't cheat because she wanted to add a new schlong to her pokédex just to expand the collection. their marriage was wack, husband oblivious and completely checked out of the relationship. wife had zero communication skills (but still more than husband) and was unhappy for a long time while it only kept getting worse. both of them shit the bed.

[@fuqu7094]

@@clintshidwood4511damn bro which girl brainwashed you? or did you fatherless? just curious

[@julinlexnder6079]

@@clintshidwood4511 the fuck

[@flamingrage100]

@@clintshidwood4511I’ll remember this when a guy steps out on his wife when she stressed with work or taken care of of the kids and decides to check out because she’s overwhelmed. Y’all are pathetic

[@avaliausd.]

​​​@@flamingrage100Look, neglecting your spouse WILL OPEN TEMPTATION. I don't care how loyal you are, if your spouse is neglecting time, communication, and intimacy with you, every other person outside of your marriage is going to start looking more attractive. Marriage is not something where you marry someone, then forget about them because they have to stay with them. No, it's something that you are supposed to be giving all of your undivided attention to EVERYDAY. If your job puts you in a position where you are too tired to tend to your spouse, then you need to quit that job, no matter how well it pays. Find a job that is more flexible, but don't neglect your spouse, then get shocked when demons are able to entice your spouse. And it doesn't even have to take you taking your spouse on dates everyday. You can do small gestures of love for your spouse and thats better than what this husband was doing. He wouldn't even kiss his wife. He gave all of his affection to their son. Of course she was going to look elsewhere for affection. It would be different if he was giving her all the affection she wanted and she still cheated, but that's not the case here.

[@blackfire6009]

"Me, me, me, me, me" "feelings, feelings, feelings, feelings, feelings" "I deserve, I deserve, I deserve, I deserve" "he's bad because I cheated". "WHAT!?!? there are consequences?!?!! Why? I swear it's not like that!" -literally every cheating story ever. That both infuriating and pathetic that there seem to be an anthropology for cheating bastards.

[@falkeborg9432]

@lucgermain9310Incels

[@rudydaberry122]

Women ain’t shit as usual

[@gwenrichard7507]

She sacrificed for her sons relationship and the father ended up admiting he cheated on OP long before her cheating.

[@Briecheesedude]

Did you check the post? Or are you inferring from Beth and the father, cuz I’m not sure he did.

[@Liquidwithac]

she is a prime example of a narcissist she only cared about herself and said she didn't want her son to hate her for what she did when he will eventually find out and still end up hating her

[@ViriBird]

"I can't fault him for my infedelity" and then she does it anyways??? Is she delusional...

[@isaiahthomas4444]

Yes. Yes she is

[@adamschaefer881]

@@isaiahthomas4444 Honesty 100

[@ianwulf24]

This so much, lmao. Literally said right before this that they would still be married if it wasn't for her husband's lack of intimacy/attention. As if that justified her infidelity. And THEN contradicted herself by saying what you quoted.

[@wanglee21]

Why there is MGTOW!

[@wanglee21]

@@ianwulf24 But if he wasn't going above and beyond to build their families financial stability, she would have found another reason to cheat for that sole reason also. "Oh you're not provide the Dream lifestyle I always wanted." Women want everything and have no accountability.

[@Stuart267]

*She didn't just cheat on her husband, she cheated on the family they'd made together too.*

[@roguetune03]

I picked up on her saying that her son was everything to her... but like, was he really though? I mean, initially her son's happiness was worth less than a one-night-stand. And then being with her son was not as important as the thrill of public sex... and then ...and then.. and then.... like damn lady do you not hear your own words? dang!? lol

[@sharkins8696]

Ah yes because passive actions and not talking makes it his fault, making the entire thing sound like you are the victim is sickening.

[@lifeisamess8100]

Is that most women normally tend to do??? Do everything and anything than to ACCEPT ACCOUNTABILITY FOR HER OWN ACTIONS!!! And even if u do (like in this story), *gaslight others in believing that I may be wrong, but it's not MY FAULT*

[@pyro7150]

OP is so annoying, she was mad at her ex-gusband because he didn't have time for her, she didn't even try to voice the problem to him and straight up started cheating and then she has the NERVE to be mad at him because he didn't trust her to keep their son safe after he was sent to the hospital because of flu and she wasn't there AND he cant trust her to not turn his son against him, which from the video looked like his son was the world for him so yea I don't feel an ounce of sympathy for her, she is a cheater who just try to put all the blame she can(saying she cheated because he didn't have time for her and that he didn't care for her as she proceed to cheat on him) on her ex, she deserved the things that happened to her

[@brighamemfield174]

She did try and voice the problems, but only once, ONLY ONCE! And based on the conversation, it was just about intimacy and not about how he was not interacting with her and the lack of care for her. All she needed to do was just to have an actual conversation with him, if not multiple. Instead, she had an affair with someone as terrible as she was and just disconnected from her married life.

[@pyro7150]

@@brighamemfield174 exactly I dont think talking once and even then about the most not important problem is not voicing your problem its more like I "tried" "so anything that I do from her is ok"

[@paggles4495]

women ☕

[@Sashin-d8t]

@@paggles4495yeah I don’t know casual misogyny always makes me feel better about cheating stories so yes wimin

[@CRABWIZRD]

HA gusband

[@SwiftSly22]

I hope he still tells his son the truth in an age appropriate manner

[@CanadianSpaceBoy]

She most likely will explain it to him herself when he is old enough

[@calebc6028]

@@CanadianSpaceBoyyou really think so 🤡

[@barryallen3555]

She traumatized her son just so he wouldn't know the truth

[@Th3Siam]

I agree, i hope at an age where he fully understands

[@xxsqf]

ya not to hurt the women caz she got what she had comming but the son deserves to know

[@later5117]

So all Jay did was say, "I understand im here for you" and all of a sudden dude is the most reliable good person lmao.

[@putent9623]

"Not becuase he trusted me, but because he couldn't be bothered" what... if he didn't trust you then he would've instantly realized you are having an affair.

[@Pikaman20008]

Yeah it’s clear she’s projecting and she’s still trying to blame him. If he didn’t care he wouldn’t have asked in the first place.

[@reflex9238]

The way I saw it, is she was so desperate for attention that she would've wanted it even if it was negative attention, which is just beyond sad at that point, the fact that even got to this point is just insane, she should've just spoken with her husband about their relationship before deciding to get railed by someone other than her husband.

[@skeetskeet7041]

She’s saying he trusted her but that wasn’t the reason he never payed attention to her

[@putent9623]

Idk if I don't trust someone, I would be instantly suspicious if they started acting shady.

[@skeetskeet7041]

@@putent9623 the issue is he did suspect something, but because he was already cold and distant (not just busy and hard at work) once he was suspicious nothing changed

[@deadpatriot4437]

This story from her is sketchy. Her boss actively encourages her to sleep with clients, which tells me this wasnt her first time cheating, just the first time she was caught. The husband lost attraction to her after his promotion most likely due to finding out about all the "clients" from other company executives cause they tend to gossip about that. Husband was just waiting for physical proof of her sleeping with clients. No sane person would allow themselves to be pimped out by their boss, instant lawsuit. Boss knew her character... so yeah, shes lying. Husband went cold blooded for a reason.

[@ripjjjsphrbggsk6292]

ikr, everytime she tell she being whore there is always "but" LMAO. trying to justify her action and i think she just want some outside support since she got none.

[@clintshidwood4511]

very cool story that you came up with there. maybe you should write one of these reddit posts too. i like how the womang gets extra bodies put of her scoreboard, she's actually the office bike and was being pimped by her boss, mr slickback, the whole time obviously. while the the guy replacing the old dishwasher model with a 30 year old nanny weeks/a month after the custody hearing doesn't raise even a cursory eyebrow. yep yep yep, zero bias here. totally a sexually active individual. also definitely an intellectual as indicated by the extraordinary ability to read between the lines and decipher "hey be friendly with client so he thinks the company cares about him as a person and hence can provide a personalized accounting(i forgot, was she accountant? real estate? wtv) service" into "yeh just suck he dik, trust, itll be mad stonks bro" dude, wakey wakey. everyone in this post sucks. husband checked out of marriage, put zero effort into intimacy of ANY sort for god knows how long. she has zerp communication skills. she cheats. he uses 5 year old child as a weapon and a shield, very classy. no heroes here, just flawed people who are kinda bad at adulting.

[@idontwhy3132]

damn, true

[@adamschaefer881]

@@clintshidwood4511 Because those stories are ALL fabrications, right? I'd tell you the story of my last ex, but you'd write it off as fiction even though I have VIDEO of her f-ing clients for sales.

[@eleethtahgra7182]

​@@clintshidwood4511nah mate. Husband is 45. Stress n office work could shut down libido. And not all guys could be articulate in expressing their stress. Some just shut up. Also, if she wants the D, she could blow him up. Or seduce, or dress sexy lingerie....or soapland massage.... Or watch pron together or something....

[@codefreak9898]

so much for "for better or for worse" took this lady one rough summer to cheat on her husband and start an affair. disgraceful

[@noFate_games2]

That's what's so interesting is how fast it was. She made it seem like it was years of neglect, but it was just a few months. A few months where it seems her husband was working real hard in the office to provide more for the family. Kinda something you should probably do when your child is real young, to setup your family for the coming years. She couldn't weather the storm for a few months...

[@andrewdavis7620]

Does she not understand that regardless of whether she signs the papers or not, she doesn’t have a chance at getting sole custody?

[@pyro7150]

yea, she cheated and has a much less paying job

[@Arkryal]

There are many cases in which she could get sole custody. But given he works for Google, and goes to the office, we can assume they are likely in California. California is a "No-fault" divorce state, which means neither party has to give a reason for divorce, and a judge will not factor in disputes, including infidelity with regard to division of assets and custody. So assuming they are in fact in CA, and not working out of a satellite office in another at-fault state, the fact that she cheated will have no influence on custody. She has no permanent residence, and is staying in her company's apartment accommodations. For any unfamiliar with this, it's common for Insurance companies, hospitals, law firms etc who entertain long-term clients to maintain apartments rather than paying to put them up in a hotel. So many companies have vacant apartments that can be used in an emergency. But this would work against her in a custody dispute. The husband would get sole custody in the short-term, with her getting visitation rights, and the courts will schedule another hearing in 6-12 months to re-evaluate if her living arrangements change. Her income isn't a huge factor for the courts provided it's sufficient to support a child. But for what it's worth, she may make more than he does. Account Managers at insurance companies can make a small fortune. But that's an ambiguous title, others make peanuts. The story doesn't give us a lot of insight into their finances. Short of abuse, incarceration, addiction, etc, it's generally uncommon for either parent to get sole custody in such a case. He only got it because she elected an uncontested divorce. Had she listened to her lawyer, she would have had joint-custody by default (again, assuming they're in CA). The husband played his hand very well. OP conflates feelings of guilt with accountability, which is why I'm sure they could never reconcile, she expressed her guilt many time but took zero accountability in the story. She thinks those are the same thing, lol. He exploited that and got everything he wanted in the divorce. Accountability would have meant telling her son (in an age-appropriate manner) what she had done, but she couldn't face that. And it's not like the kid will never find out, so she just delayed the inevitable. She gave up her own child to postpone his finding out about the affair by a couple years at most, and I think the kid will fault her even more for that. But that's what made her feel better in the moment, and feeling good in the moment is all she seems to prioritize, which is how she ended up here, and she STILL doesn't see it... I feel sorry for her, how does someone get their head that far up their own ass?

[@pyro7150]

the custody thing was that he knew she could get sole custody but the husband said he will expose her hence making their son hate her

[@reflex9238]

@@Arkryal Couldn't agree more, the husband would've not had a winning hand at all if she just grew a pair and admitted what she did to her son. I do slightly disagree in that she could've fought for joint custody as the husband mostly likely would've then threaten her with telling their son to get her to step down and given everything she's done she probably would step down. Like I said in another comment, only thing I can commend OP is for being more responsible than any other cheater on Reddit telling their story and not being as entitled as most, since a lot of stories there'd be some satisfaction in that most are so in their ways they refused to admit what they did was wrong or deal with the consequences, but this one is the definition of pitiful like its not even satisfying its just sad how they knew they were doing something wrong the entire time but kept it up away.

[@voidroad]

@@reflex9238 its not about "growing a pair" if her son hates her she's fucked. He can pick who he lives with past a certain age. and she's not getting any child support if he lives because she's a cheating cunt.

[@hershade]

"son is 5 years old.....knowing something like that would break his heart" NOW YOU CARE A LOT ABOUT YOUR SONS HEARTBREAK? WHEN YOU DID SHIT WITH ANOTHER MAN YOU DIDNT REMEMBER ABOUT YOUR SON????

[@Sahil24980]

Exactly

[@razofdead]

Even she blame son of 5 years for been occupied in summercamp

[@Cainesugars]

Unable to accountability unable to be honest unable to tell the truth Unable to voice there opinions I don’t feel sorry for cheaters You wanna know why? Because they’re not willing to do either of those things

[@jjnix9517]

This sounds like a cheater trying to rationalize what they did and shift the blame to the other spouse. My guess is she was emotionally abusive and neglectful and drove him away.

[@elseggs6504]

Nah, this sounds like Fantasy lmao

[@KaijuEmperor-xi5qg]

@@elseggs6504 Truth is stranger then fiction they say

[@michaelmolina5750]

I like how she tried her absolute best to make her seem like she was the victim what a goofy person 😭💀

[@AliothAncalagon]

That woman seriously rationalizes how she couldn't continue seeing her affair partner, because its "too reckless" right after destroying her marriage by cheating in the first place. You can't make this shit up.

[@andreibossahtamon3950]

you know she sugar coated this story as much as she could

[@averagenoob2.0]

This goes well beyond "kinda cheating"

[@Nameless82284]

I know right, lies. She didn't "kind of cheated" she just straight up cheated. Kind of cheating would be like he kissed her and she kissed him back before realizing what she was doing. That's kind of cheating

[@thetruetri5106]

I expected more to happen the way 'revenge' was highlighted. Divorcing and moving on in life is like the most normal reaction ever

[@StevenThePhoneHead]

I think revenge was emphasized for the ex using their son basically as blackmail, and then very shortly after the divorce, getting with the Nanny purely to cause the cheater pain, seeing the man she "loved" so dearly with another woman, and SoOoOoOoOooOOOooooOo soon after their divorce.

[@thetruetri5106]

@@StevenThePhoneHead honestly even those don't really seem vengeful motivated to me. The thing with the son was probably rather motivated from a desire to be there for his son rather than keep her away (otherwise he wouldn't let her visit like that) and I don't think he'd marry the nany if he just dated her to spite his ex (and can't really blame him for being a little gleeful about it hurting her to see him with someone else as a byproduct)

[@TheSm1thers]

​@@StevenThePhoneHead Yeah but why would he want his son to be even partly raised by a girl who messes over her whole family for an adrenaline rush and refuses to take accountability? If she truly cared about her son she'd be willing to admit herself to her wrongdoings at an age-appropriate time and maybe they could have joint custody.

[@brutustantheiii8477]

THAT is what makes this the PERFECT STORY it is the BEST revenge because it is the HARSHEST to the Cheating Wives of the world BUT PERFECTLY IN ORDER objectively Edit: autocorrect spelling

[@brutustantheiii8477]

@@StevenThePhoneHead So in other words the Cheated on Husband WAS THE WINNER and did NOTHING wrong, and got everything he deserved, including well deserved schadenfreude and an upgrade and second chance at love

[@darrenjames3065]

The sheer amount of gaslighting from the ex-wife is astounding.

[@frozenfresh6406]

Love the part where she sits her husband down and talks about how she misses spending time and being intimate with him when he was working the extra hours... oh wait, she just went and cheated without ever talking about it and blamed him for it. Lol, she even tried to shirk responsibility to the Jay guy, saying he knew that she was married with a kid... yet she only "kinda" cheated... Nice.

[@Whatdoesntmakemesoundweird]

What I don’t understand is why on earth would anyone send their 5 year old child away to camp for 2 months? That’s incomprehensible

[@Devin-O]

Dude I did 2 months with cadets it is dam fun.

[@Whatdoesntmakemesoundweird]

@@Devin-O how old were you?

[@Devin-O]

@@Whatdoesntmakemesoundweird Many years ago 13 to 15 ish.

[@Whatdoesntmakemesoundweird]

That’s a massive difference than 5 years. 5 is far too young. You were much older and able to decide for yourself, do many more activities and cope being away from your family.

[@ncd2164]

@@Devin-Or u dumb? U were a teen u weren’t five like the kid in the story lmao

[@Goldiavolo]

I noticed throughout this story that She literally based her closeness to her husband by their amount of sexual intimacy. Not about how he works every day to help provide, not how he DOES trust her enough to not question her when she gives vague responses. And she had no direct communication with him about her feelings, just again, vague, little things to him. He’s just being a man and she blames him for literal infidelity

[@eleethtahgra7182]

Nah. She based it on how much he romance her.

[@bear.b]

Every person in this story is awful. They’re all selfish and self centred. She’s stupid to cheat and to be surprised there consequences and to try to blame anyone else but herself. I’d find it funny if anyone would try to justify her actions. Jay is shit for approaching a married woman and partaking in the affair knowing she had a child. And her husband is shit because he prioritised money over his family. Children don’t care about money they only remember when their parents aren’t there. They sounds like a well off middle class family and he could have tried to have a better work life balance to actually see his child once in a while. They both work so it’s not like they were struggling for money for him to have to work harder. He was just greedy at the expense of his child. I only feel sorry for the poor kid, he’ll grow up being parented by nannies because both his parents are cu**ts who are too selfish to take care of him after bringing him into this world.

[@MMFerreiraBruno]

​@@eleethtahgra7182Yes she did...

[@DarkSiren979]

Not just sex. She stated he didn't talk to or touch her at all. He she said it was like a hotel for him. As in less than roommates

[@reflex9238]

This story was the definition of pitiful, most cheating stories always tend to have a satisfying climax mostly because most cheaters from a lot of these stories tend to be so entitled in refuses to admit wrong doings or seeing how consequences were going to arrive for their actions, but this OP continued to cheat despite knowing it was wrong which just makes it all the more worse, like alright the husband is being neglect but that's not a get out of jail free card to just cheat and given how she brought up the possibility of divorce before she started seeing anyone because she felt so neglected but didn't want to do so because she wanted to "stay for the kid" is asinine and even then that should've been a wake up call to try and exhaust every possibility in trying to make her marriage work like you know actually communicate with her husband instead of letting herself get ignored hoping that he'll magically pick up on her being depressed, if she can't communicate or doesn't make the effort to communicate with her husband he's not given a chance to try and fix his marriage and that falls on her for being terrible at communicating. I'll entertain the idea okay, let's just say she was never able to get him to talk or whatever because he's "so busy" or they do talk and all her concerns fall on deaf ears, that's no reason to fricking cheat. Honestly that would mean the husband himself is checked out of the marriage and doesn't care to try and make her feel wanted which still doesn't mean to cheat it means to file for divorce as there'd be no other reason to stay "for the kid" which makes things worse in the long run and that's exactly how this ended as now she was barely able to see her kid anymore because of her refusal to make any logical decision. It's as I stated before there's just no satisfaction in this story as its just pitiful.

[@eleethtahgra7182]

The thing is, hes probably under lots of stress. N hes 45. Thus, high chance of lower libido.

[@CanadianSpaceBoy]

Her biggest mistake was not respecting herself and her husband enough to set the boundaries and explain her needs. YOUR NEEDS AND BUNDARIES are the most important thing you can discuss with your significant other.

[@noobslayer6915]

Yes! How many people need to be told that a relationship is built on trust, communication, and making sacrifices for one another.

[@charlie3849]

Solid proof that people cheat over low self-esteem, and lack of attention. Imagine ruining your family because you don't FEEL as desired as you once were; because you need attention like a child. Closed mouths don't get fed. She can blame her ex-husband as much as she wants but she had the ability to make it known how she felt and didn't. The ball was in her court, and she didn't do anything yet blames him constantly.

[@talie559]

I like that she pointed out all her husbands flaws before saying what she did. "Her reasons"

[@klaesjensen5930]

This woman wouldn't recognize real love if it hit her in the face. She just seeks attention, and so when she didn't get any from her hardworking husband, she cheated with the first guy who gave her some attention instead of communicating her feelings to her husband. Also, she's claiming that Jay is oh so understanding bla bla bla, but that's bs. He's so "understanding" because he doesn't have any commitment to OP, so he's treading lightly so he doesn't lose his thrilling bootycall affair.

[@alexandriaconstandinoglu147]

Honey, you thought you were in clear all this time, but that period of bliss for you was really just your husband gathering evidence and keeping it on the down low. You can’t have your cake and eat it too, which is something you were going to have to learn at some point.

[@VRDejaVu]

Excuses, excuses, excuses...

[@Babidi111]

- For sure. Still, girls can't live on just food and water, they are fueled by attention. You can't just stop being intimate for that long and barely show any interest and not expect them to lose their minds. They obviously should have talked about that, but its still a predictable outcome if you suddenly stop with the D injections.

[@VRDejaVu]

@@Babidi111 Predictable yet still despicable.

[@dannym1589]

Husband was probably cheating. He can't be that busy for months, most software developers usually have gaps in their contracts to have time off and many good companies actually encourage time off.

[@VRDejaVu]

@@dannym1589 be careful, you'll pull something with that much stretching.

[@peterrj1973]

@@dannym1589 yeah he might also could have been cooking meth, thats why he got so much money, f off

[@maclex7046]

Note, she started cheating after some months of his promotion. It was still to early for him to adapt to the new style, and he clearly said was tired. Before, he never made time for the son because he knew mom was at home. I remove some points for him still caring for revenge after a year of divorce.

[@EarthAngel504]

Yea. she "kinda" cheated, and "kinda" destroyed her marriage and family. It's amazing how she can rationalize cheating on her husband by him "ignoring" her. She didn't describe her actions of her cheating and affair as "revenge" for him "ignoring her But when he caught her cheating, and waned her removed from his and his son's life. She described his actions is "Revenge". Lol. amazing.

[@Bing635]

she Kinda Cheated ......

[@bobroy4800]

kinda crazy how she keeps talking abt losing her son and how sad she is bc of it when it's 100% her fault. When u cheat, not only r u cheating on spouse but the child too

[@KichewGaming]

I like how in this entire thing she never made an attempt to try talking to the husband about how she feels neglected and went straight to having an affair. while i don't condone using the son against her, she deserved what she got overall for breaking the marriage, without even attempting to communicate. how sad

[@sciencehau5]

MeN dOn'T lIsTeN

[@gibblets17]

that's because she's lying. cheaters always jump on the "its the relationships fault" band wagon. they don't cheat because they are simply bad people. no. they have to justify it to others and themselves as "the relationship with my spouse got so bad that i cheated." because then they aren't at fault. they get to spread the fault around and victim blame their spouse. The truth is they loved the relationship just fine. in fact they liked that their spouse was checked out. makes cheating easier. they get to eat their cake and have it too. one spouse at home for boring stuff like kids and bills and chores.... and another for "fun" and "excitement". so when caught.... they blame the relationship and their inability to communicate. but the truth is... in most cases, there was no problem in the cheaters eyes besides loss of attraction and wandering lust fueling them... they would prefer if they could go back to secretly cheating. its soooooooo exciting for them.

[@ThatOneAmpharos]

bruh i genuinely think people nowadays cant have a one on one talk with thier partners. Is it actually that hard to community your feelings lmao

[@bluewizardtx]

So....instead of telling your husband how you feel, and that you dont feel connected anymore and that you need to spend time together, you decide to cheat????

[@standardcake18]

i love how she painted him as a bad husband the entire time. but he was working that much and that hard FOR her, and their son. and then she was upset that he came home early after the divorce... yeah, he had 1 less dead weight to work for now.

[@ripjjjsphrbggsk6292]

"kinda cheated" bruhh you had a sex multiple times LOL. she chose multiple time to convince herself that she has been neglected and proceed to cheat but no on tell her husband that she need him the most. well you deserved so much.

[@Nameless82284]

I know right. Kinda cheating would be like if she kissed another man before pulling away and realizing her mistake, that's kinda cheating. But this is just straight up cheating. What, does she not count it as cheating because she's lonely and her husband was neglectful?

[@GSP-76]

This woman's story is so common, you could pretty much guess it without listening to it. She explains everything as if she's the victim. Its all her husband's fault for working too hard. Its his fault they got divorced and his fault she can't see her son. Women like this don't care about their families or husbands. Its all about instant gratification for them. This is why you should never marry someone after knowing them fir a year or two...wait 5 years and really get to know who they really are.

[@MrCovi2955]

14:50 "Jay was a good person" No, Jay was a good lover. But he was objectively a bad person. Good people don't have affairs with married women.

[@jamesunderwoood8412]

She could’ve talked about how to get her needs met, instead she got horny and went with another guy. The fact she cut of contact with Jay seemingly forever just shows it was never love. She threw everything away for a fling. She also threw her kid away, and I hope that realization does the least amount of damage possible when he figures it out.

[@clintshidwood4511]

yes! the realization that marriage takes two people, not one or as is in this case, zero people, to actually function in a healthy manner. maybe he'll learn that you got to interact with spouse, at least /sometimes/; so fingers crossed new wife doesnt cheat and leave in new BP time. old wife could really benefit from learning how to communicate using words and pauses between those words so as to relay her thoughts to beings who lack the ability to read minds. jay should start a closet company or something, idk. marry a Latina maybe?

[@eleethtahgra7182]

​@@clintshidwood4511nah. Precedent. She knows how cold blooded he could be.

[@MMFerreiraBruno]

Her needs WERE being met, not her wants though... and that's what started the whole sh*tshow....

[@sabereaseera1384]

I thought “kinda cheating” would be talking with someone else that could remotely be considered flirting. Not full blown sleeping with someone else multiple times. There is no “kinda” about that.

[@aprilb1273]

Same

[@dharma391]

OP's delusional : - She can drop the "kinda cheated", like it's a mild mistake to do and you should be ok with it. - Software engineers have immense work on their shoulders, so yeah, him working extra hours and being tired is a thing - "If maybe I waited instead of cheating"... No. If maybe you "COMMUNICATED" is the right statement. It's like saying "Oh well if he truly knew me, he would see". Time to grow up if you want your marriage to work. - You took him what was dear for him, he'll take what's dear to you from you. Fair share amirite ? - I'm pretty sure if he had time for the kid, it's because he had to ask for extra time at work due to him being a single parent during that time.

[@OfficialREVENGEMusic]

Weaponizing a child in a divorce still makes him a major asshole. Wife is a slut, don't get me twisted, but leave your fucking kids out of the divorce.

[@silent_mushroom]

Husband is a sigma chad

[@ClappedYourdadzCheeks]

No, the husband was also cheating, he married far too quickly and did his nanny way too quickly, he just used his ex wife’s cheating as a get out of jail free card. The husband is just as bad.

[@sidoso9810]

@@ClappedYourdadzCheeks finally somebody else saw it

[@headhunter3744]

​@@ClappedYourdadzCheeksand do you have any proof of that?? Or is it all based on assumption that he moved on so quickly.. Is he suppose to spend decade drinking and doing hardcore drug before moving on???

[@vladdracul2379]

I fail to see where the guy "wasn't a good husband." He is working to ensure you have a good life with minimal worries and that your child is looked after and loved. So because he's not entirely intimate with you for a time, you cheat. That's just h0e behavior.

[@SynapseNervosa]

He wasn't working and doing the promotion for the betterment of his family, that's just a lie he was telling himself. If he was, he would've taken a day off to take his wife on a date instead of making her the live in maid and nanny. The fact that he married the live in nanny shows this is probably what his relationships with women is like, and I'm positive he will do the exact same thing of ignoring her to focus on his career and then lying to himself that its for the family.

[@Kosac07]

@@SynapseNervosa this

[@TheChosen141]

@@SynapseNervosathat’s a lot of stretching to victim blame

[@brutustantheiii8477]

@@SynapseNervosa WHAT?! PURE Victim Blaming based on misandry and female privilege is ALL I read from your comment. How dare you think that men can’t defend their own self respect by properly dispatching a wife who betrayed him Any man who has ANY self respect would see this man as a winner and a role model. He deserves every hug including all the schadenfreude he can get from making the wife pay for 110% of all this since she was 110% in the wrong. Full stop

[@enriqueperezarce5485]

@@SynapseNervosaHole shit the amount of doormating and coping within this post. Guess what when your married a guys money is the wife’s money and the wife’s is her. The guy is providing, making sure that if she ever fails in her career they have a fall back

[@mtheory3]

"I couldn't believe my ears? How could he threaten to tell our son something like THAT!?" [Referring to the truth]

[@clintshidwood4511]

hey little timmy. mommy is a whore. she doesn't love daddy anymore, she sleeps with other daddies now. we will not be a family anymore, it is joever timmy. mommy is a betrayer and a liar. wicked woman who stabbed me in the back. timmy. come closer. mommy is *leans in to timmys ear and softly whispers* a biiiiiiiiiiiiitch. definitely not trying to sabotage any chance of a healthy relationship little five year old timmy should have with his birth giver. lets fuck with timmys brain and take 1 of the 2 most precious and trustworthy people that timmy has in his life and unmask her as the devil. there is 0 chance that this could have a life long phycological effect on someone. i hear that incels have awesome relationships with their moms so timmy has nothing to worry about, right?

[@FisforFenton]

why do cheaters not just talk it out they always say the other person drove me to it but they never talked to their partner about what they were feeling they just cheat.

[@vlugovsky]

"Jay was a good person"!!!! Yeah, right! Good people always sleep with married women.

[@raven06010]

TL;DR: Cheating is never justifiable and you should NEVER do it.

[@gawainethefirst]

“He wasn’t a good husband” because he worked long hours? You had a nice house, right? Both you and your son had plenty to eat? The bills were all paid? International vacations, it sounds like?

[@Kosac07]

and you're conveniently forgetting that she had a job, too... and she had time and energy for their kid and her husband yet he hadn't. They also had a nanny that he happened to marry soon after... He was just a manipulative bastard in this story.

[@gawainethefirst]

@@Kosac07 I can’t disagree with you more.

[@Kosac07]

@@gawainethefirst it's alright, you'll grow up some day.

[@brutustantheiii8477]

@@Kosac07 and you’ve completely forgotten WHO cheated and betrayed who. But I guess men can’t be victims or ever in the right with comments like yours, huh?

[@Kosac07]

@@brutustantheiii8477 stop forgetting how female hearts work... man are more stuck to their principles and ideas, women follow their heart. And he betrayed her heart a long time ago, she then betrayed his "values."

[@GraberJoel22]

Can we all give a round of applause for the person doing parkour? Didn't miss a single jump that whole time!

[@casualsatanist5808]

What an absolute chad of a husband. Calmly confronts his whore cheater wife and even laughs at her miserable response. How she cheats on a genius, disciplined, loving father is completely fucking mentsl to me...

[@BERKE-no1ds]

How pathetic, she did not try to talk to her husband about his working hours, but she then proceeded to have an affair. And throughout the whole video I can only hear excuses, and she even dared to say that only after their divorce the husband started going back home early, as if there couldn't be a discussion with him about that before opening her legs.

[@EthanSchaner]

She gives me narcissist vibes. She's trying so hard to make her ex-husband the villain by justifying all of her actions while trying to paint him in the worst light possible. If you have an issue try marriage counseling or therapy before jumping off the deep end.

[@mindyourenigma]

80/20 cheater. He was giving her 80% of what she wanted. But it wasnt enough, she cheated for a guy who gave her the other 20%. Never works out, and the regret always come when they lose the 80%.

[@MrRemi1992]

The husband went from google engineer to CIA operator with those investigative skills. He legit remained calm and collected and delivered those papers swifly.

[@enriqueperezarce5485]

He is in the wrong profession, he needs to go into espionage and get trained

[@Loqvu]

22:26 or if you communicated as a partner he could’ve found a way to come home early to satisfy you😂😂why is it always a but when all you have to say is you’re a disloyal partner

[@Anon21486]

Did anyone else pick up the husband saying he wanted to take them on an international trip? That would imply that he wanted to surprise them. If so, it would explain why he worked so many hours and why he was too tire....

[@saltykitty9215]

Still not a good excuse to neglect the wife. At least he could have said something like: I'm planning a huge surprise for our family! I'm sorry for feeling so tired all the time, and I appreciate your patience! LOVE YOU??? Maybe give her a peck? He wouldn't have passed out from saying and doing these things

[@eleethtahgra7182]

@@saltykitty9215 Ummm....yeah. Still not good excuse to cheat, isnt it? Well....theres no good excuse for cheating. Maybe...she could....seduce him? Then it wouldnt be a surprise, would it?

[@TheChosen141]

@@saltykitty9215ok cheater

[@brutustantheiii8477]

@@saltykitty9215 ok, cheating wife apologist. We men are learning from how little the opposite sex regards us now a days with comments just like yours

[@sidoso9810]

the husband was cheating too

[@_aweshit]

Jay was so good he went after a married wife. 😂

[@DamnDamariah]

If she verbally told him to come home early sometimes couldve avoided all this xd

[@tareco6965]

Cheating people when there's consequences for their actions: 😲😩

[@ryshag]

Oh wow. The ol’ “If only my husband had given me more attention” bullshit. Zero accountability taken. Glad the ex husband chased after the 30 year old nanny, well done.

[@galahad695]

Dude sacrifised his life to give his familly the best life possible, and she couldn't even see that, or voice her frustrations about the situation... Went straight to cheating

[@JRBDWD]

"Kinda cheating"? Why are women like this?

[@KilroyWasHere83]

JAY IS SLEEPING WITH YOU KNOWING YOU ARE MARRIED! HE IS LITERALLY THE OPPOSITE OF A GOOD PERSON!

[@sersiniokyte5558]

Good person, my ass.

[@MhoonSke]

Lessons learned here: #1 Don't ignore your partner even if you're tired #2 Don't be unfaithful to your partner

[@TheSm1thers]

You're allowed to be tired lol

[@6sixFace]

You're not allowed to use it an an excuse to the point of habitual neglect. ​@@TheSm1thers He knew what he was doing and he didn't care at all. He was very wrong here. She was also very wrong here.

[@TheSm1thers]

@@6sixFace If he's stressed with work and isn't up for sex then that's perfectly valid. He doesn't owe her sex. If it really bothers her, she should express that and find a way to help him destress, she can also try pleasuring herself. You're gonna have periods like that in relationships, it's just how it is.

[@TheChosen141]

@@6sixFaceyou’re seriously comparing being tired at work to fucking another dude for multiple months 😂

[@MrCovi2955]

Its always shocking when the cheater feels hurt seeing their ex with someone else. And yet, they are completely oblivious to the pain they caused first.

[@ZomegJ]

Why should the nanny feel guilty about sleeping with him if they both are single adults no reason to feel guilty it's obvious the ex wife is still trying to play victim.

[@233kosta]

So when _he_ says "You won't do me because you don't love me" it's manipulative, but when _she_ does it, it's a 'cry for help' that justifies subsequent cheating. Got it.

[@ObviouslyGuitarMen]

I've listened to too many of these. I'm getting mad hearing "he was attractive, I didn't know what I was doing" Women will do literally anything to avoid accountability. They'll literally make up fairy tales

[@Stuart267]

*Why do women always call cheating on their partner a "mistake". I know they have an inability to accept accountability.*

[@yourfriendlyneighbourhoodl6206]

I like how Mens casually playing Minecraft. As someone is telling a story of how a man is being cheated on

[@protendi]

I have a strong feeling that the husband was sleeping with Beth while this was going on and just took advantage of the situation while he could. Calculated move if so.

[@eleethtahgra7182]

Nah. Nope. Well, yes, its not an impossibility. In his defence, based on OP story, hes stressed, always at work, and hes 45....in midlife crisis phase. At such age, with such job (different than physical job)....theres a good chance that libido would decrease. And Beth only enter the picture after the kid is home. The low segg have appeared since the begining of the story and has been going on more than 2 months. And....shes not communicating...shes complaining. She doesnt even seems to want to seduce the hubby....

[@brutustantheiii8477]

STOP with the casual misandrist, cheating wife enabling slander. Pure female privilege is all you’re promoting

[@Alyasiry87]

Love how she kept blaming her husband and her boss for cheating! 😂😂 I really hope him and beth have a great life together

[@razofdead]

His son was to blame… too

[@abhinavsekhon6555]

@@razofdead how, in what way? he was not even involved in any of this.

[@razofdead]

@@abhinavsekhon6555 not support and been absent like not risking anything

[@0mniSlash]

"how could he do that, it would destroy my son to know I was cheating on his dad". Maybe don't cheat then. Women ☕

[@SchoolVideosGoHere]

I'm not sure if it's the POV or what, but the husband comes off a bit cruel and cold. I get worrying about your child's safety after she failed to pick him up from school, but you need to separate your want for revenge from depriving your child of their mother. This is another cheating is always wrong, but inattention sets your partner up for failure story. Also if you're divorcing her, why is it your business who she dates?

[@SchoolVideosGoHere]

And there is no kinda cheating and it's bizarre the OP refuses to type out she cheated/slept with Jay

[@Kosac07]

@@SchoolVideosGoHere it's simple. She cheated with her body to have her needs satisfied, but not with her heart and mind. The brain didn't want to accept it.

[@Archone666]

I don't even believe in monogamy - but I DO believe in being faithful. Adultery isn't about the sex, it's about the cheating, the LIES. The BETRAYAL. This woman brought it on herself.

[@Niveous23]

If your spouse is tired from long hours, that's for YOUR benefit. If you're not as tired, the really cool thing you can do with that extra energy is be supportive. Maybe a nice meal, maybe fresh sheets, maybe some words of love and encouragement. You'd be fucking surprised how that small effort motivates them to at least try to be there for you more the next day. Obviously the next day because their body wont magically rejuvinate. But you WILL mentally exhaust them by making it all about you, and being nasty about their downtrodden state. They'll start spending more time in the car in your driveway just to avoid talking to you. This is before marriage ending shit like cheating occurs. She's got all this extra energy. Could have used it to make the marriage stronger. " I was lonely/bored". Sounds like you have the extra energy needed to spice up the relationship all on your fucking own...like an adult. And then when you're tired, it'll be their turn to love bomb you. That's how a real marriage works.

[@21mrcy]

U r on to something here

[@Kosac07]

Yeah for how long? A month? 6 months? A year? This marriage was doomed long before this. Tired and promotion are classic men excuses for when they don't care about their partner anymore, but are too big of coward to admit it. Especially when he oh so conveniently had the time to come home early after the divorce and got to marry the nanny so quickly...

[@TheChosen141]

@@Kosac07men aren’t allowed to be tired got it. Cheaters gonna cheat so keep living your life

[@Kosac07]

@@TheChosen141 no, just choose your priorities. Your life long partner or your job, especially if you're not competent enough to keep both...

[@TheChosen141]

@@Kosac07 Or, wild suggestion, relationships go through ebbs and flows, don't bail out as soon as it ebbs. A newly promoted software engineer at Google will go through career schedule difficulties and be a bit tired from the new responsibilities, who could've ever seen that coming? Men aren't robots that have to do everything perfectly without any loss of energy no matter what life changes happen. And blaming him for something another grown human being did says more about you than him.

[@syedkahar4679]

Her husband is wrong for neglecting her, she's obviously wrong for cheating, her company is wrong for pressuring her to get close and personal with a potential client, especially knowing that she's married, and both of them are wrong for not discussing their thoughts

[@Kosac07]

this

[@eleethtahgra7182]

Alas, its biology. Just like....how some women turn to daemoness during time of the month. Its biology. Nah. Thats an excuse. If...she wants the D, she gotta work on it. She could seduce the husband. Appear with naked 4pron carrying beer or whatever. Or heck, she could guilt trip him or manipulate him. Alas, she work to get other guys D. If only she do the flirting with the hubby instead.... But alas, thats the nature with some guys. If a woman is open to flirting...and shes taken...it means shes a cheap woman. It means its okay to cross the boundary. After all, shes just a cheap woman...no better than a pr0stitute.

[@Mao-s6q]

“ I can take the consequences of my affair”….never realized not seeing son is a consequence. She talks about how important her son is but all her actions were for her pleasure.

[@SenseiRaisen]

TAKE THE L AND COPE! Because you're still not hold yourself accountable for your actions and honestly ... what he did in return was mild to said the least. Also i will be glad to listen the other side, because i think this going beyond one time.

[@TheChillyFries]

The whole story could been finished in 2 minutes. Every second sentence she tries to blame her husband

[@makojazz]

If you're unhappy with your marriage life, just f-ing leave. So what now, cheating to stay longer is better than straight up divorce for your child? You could've just joint custody while being on a friendly terms with your ex rather than having a more messier relationship because of infidelity.

[@TwilightMysts]

I would say this one is ESH. OP cheated on her husband, which is a big black mark against her. The ex was neglectful of his wife, which lead to all of this, and is a small black mark. The ex weaponized their son and wanted keep him from his mother, which is a medium black mark. The ex was engaged to the nanny within 6 months of the divorce, which is shady. Could be square and thus a small black mark, or he was sleeping with her months before he learned about OP cheating, in which case he has an even bigger black mark than OP.

[@inyu00]

I'd say more op took her job over family cheated neglected her family for jay had no care how cheating would effect her son or husband only spoke once to the husband bout what was wrong and didn't voice at all she felt neglected only cared when the conquences rolled out put jay over her son if she was at work she would've got the call showed she emotionally unstable to marry or take care of her kid if she's jumping on the first D she can get husband was semi neglectful a surprise trip is good an all but not at the cost of the family unit it's kinda sad he had to blackmail to equal sexist courts. cuz it's well know the courts way more often than not award custody to one mother should've told her why he was distant (only one with screws loose would think a cheater male or female should have the kids) pros OP has no ill will husband lets her have visitation a luxury alot of wemon don't extend has moved on and is now engaged into a more hopefully stable/healthy relation. instead of wallowing for a bad relationship(which is a good thing BTW, he already knew the nanny and 6 months and how long of knowing her is not unheard of) you just want to hate the husband and excuse the cheater

[@gaaraxnaru]

​@inyu00 1. The sexist courts is a lie and statistics show most men CHOOSE to have less or no custody. 2. Even if the courts WERE sexist that doesn't excuse using your child in a pawn for blackmail, that's sick. 3. He also chose his job over his family. Notice the trip never happened, even with just the son, he most likely said that to make her feel worse. Even if the trip did exist, you shouldn't neglect your spouse. It wasn't just a lack of sex, dude didn't even talk to her really. What does that have to do with working hard? 4. He was definitely banging the nanny. He was so quick to divorce and remarry and that usually screams rebound or cheating. 5. The person above was in no way defending cheaters. They rightfully pointed out that both the cheater and the ex husband sucked. And I agree. I despise cheaters, but this story wasn't about an innocent husband who was pulling his weight as a spouse only to be betrayed. OP should've talked to him and if that didn't work, filed for divorce. Cheating, outside of abuse, is never okay.

[@-darkstar-x]

Ho ho ho..... Merry slutsmas! Btw if a guy has to work a lot and always tired it doesnt make him a bad husband. Hes paying for your life and habits lay off.