My life is So Boring. Why so many Japanese middle-aged people feel so

My life is So Boring. Why so many Japanese middle-aged people feel so.

[@Sharon-sw7mr]

Secret to Happiness: 1. Something to do 2. Something to look forward to 3. Someone to love

[@jeffreywiley9661]

Elvis Presley said this back in the day.

[@bigchief2331]

And sadly in this sick modern world, so many are lacking all three

[@Mythdoubt]

As if number 3 was accessible to everyone, especially middle aged men.

[@bleuet3897]

@@Mythdoubt lots of ladies and dudes (if you're into that) out there :)

[@Shutityou]

@@bleuet3897fat ones.

[@bailey309]

I’ve lived in Japan for almost 30 years and it’s really refreshing to hear a Japanese man speak so openly and candidly.

[@Tom-gf9js]

Yep, it’s quite rare for Japanese. Lived there for 15+ yrs …

[@Shubeeduwah]

Yes, and showing face clearly without wearing a mask or editing the voice or something.

[@a.s.1737]

That's pretty sad considering this isn't a controversial topic....

[@smithjeff3002]

New York City native living in Osaka 31 years in July. Agree fully: Japanese men are conditioned not to discuss their feelings because as we know this culture considers it “complaining (notice how in the beginning he makes it clear he isn’t depressed…).” The people have willingly ignored a lot of problems, and not confronting their government by having no plans for the future: it’s coming to a head.

[@ninjaturtle6106]

He may beJapanese but he sounds American. May have lived in the US.

[@chingbilling662]

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation" - Henry David Thoreau

[@LetsGo_Brandon]

@tikkiu7345 Who cares? Thoreau was a mooch. His mommy paid for his meal for those two years, two months, and two days, and he borrowed land from Ralph Waldo Emerson, on and on. What good are his critiques?

[@pwh5805]

He has a wife that risked her health twice to gave birth and is sacrificing her time to take care of their children, but for this man it’s still not good enough.

[@iv2sab512]

@@aaron___6014 It was a pretty cool cabin though.

[@lauriey6089]

men or people? women had to get married w losers to have a stable life, especially in poorer countries.

[@JohnDoe-zz7on]

It's up to you to keep yourself entertained.

[@jussimatikainen4681]

I am 41-years-old man from Finland. I felt the same along time in my life. I have a degree in economics and marketing major. I was in a relationship with my ex-wife back then and working in a big company after collage. I was making good money and had a good looking woman but I felt very unhappy. Then (luckily) I got divorced 2013 and I was 30 at that time. First it was really hard to figure out what to do in my life. Then step by step I learned the things that are important to me. I started to play guitar, started a own business, went to singing classes, travelled to a lot of different countries and now everything is more that great. I am single, no kids and I can do the things I love to do but it took like 10 years to get here. I started to write diary and slowly figure out what is my thing in life. I think because of all this "noise" in our lifes it is really hard to find youself these days. I takes lonelyness and time to master youself and I think that is the most important thing in life... to find youself... Really good video. Thanks

[@askjapan9669]

thanks for your comment.

[@Ash-vt5cp]

lol i can't help but think your advice here is to divorce and leave kids/wife

[@SaraWritesFantasy]

Dude I’m sorry but how do you have a hot wife and not want to immediately put a kid on her 😭😭 and how could u find ur life boring omfg I’m so jealous I literally want your life in your 20s especially you being a white fit dude like bro I’m an ugly black lesbian lmfao

[@arthurvilkas7815]

Most important thing in life=have kids. He literally explained in the video about population decline. Personally I don't fear it because there will be a natural equilibrium at some point and the economy and everything will figure out how to equalize

[@Ash-vt5cp]

@@arthurvilkas7815 yes but _when_ will the equilibrium be reached, and after how much pain...

[@rihan449]

MAN looks damn good to be 50 y old

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks

[@summerwinter89]

no way. he could pass for 30

[@rihan449]

@@summerwinter89 he said he is around 50 in the video

[@ykjali]

japanese people are known for not aging

[@DrunkTranquility]

​@@rihan449 most Asians don't crack ... lol

[@BurakBuu]

It's rare to see such honest opinion from Japanese people, really appreciate your honesty about the situation and your feelings

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment

[@michaelaxis6304]

Oh just because he is Japanese shut up

[@leisiyox]

Maybe because he is older, speaks english and the channel is small so he is safer

[@user-jf5gl2yb6h]

@@leisiyox lol it's not like they are going to assassinate him

[@leisiyox]

@@user-jf5gl2yb6h ofc not but criticise online? yes

[@gobofraggel7383]

At the age of 53 I ate a 🍄and I saw the world through new eyes. Grabbed my kid's bike and rode it several miles back to the old neighborhood where I grew up. I hit the handball courts and spoke with random people and enjoyed the beauty of being alive in a way I had forgotten. Why did I ever stop? Why did I get into a dull routine of work/home/work/home and nothing else? The world didn't change, I did. It's always there, always welcoming you to live a life that makes you happy.

[@Maayraa111]

Me too, I read this book that was like a 🍄. It basically states we are in a 💭 dream, like all this is an illusion , a matrix of codes that seem real but it’s all in our head.

[@AndrewKrivtsov]

Just a side note. You don’t need a fungi or radical life decisions to get there

[@random_dude_007]

@@Maayraa111 What book did you read?

[@TremendousSax]

​@@AndrewKrivtsovyou don't need it but it accelerates your progress

[@donsimons9810]

you live within a few miles where you grew up? Maybe shrooms didn’t help that

[@chuckmorton8823]

This is happening everywhere ... humans need to be free, not slaves to some corporation

[@rossg9363]

there is some truth in that

[@michaeltheunissen609]

1984 - George Orwell . Written in 1949 and as powerful then as it is now. Everybody should read it , especially in these times!

[@unvaxxeddoomerlife6788]

Or slaves to a government. We are tribal creatures, let us have our cultures back.

[@MarcoRC-p5y]

It's more spiritual aspect I think not material people have nothing to live and die for

[@Tribes11]

Slaves to the government and politics.

[@SinlowMusic]

Depressing Story Time: From 2018 - 2022 I was stationed in Iwakuni, Japan in the US Marines. One of my side-quests was being a Finance nerd off to the side for the unit (yes, we do math in the Marines sometimes). I befriended the civilian comptroller (finance boss) Mr. Fujita a kind 50-year-old Japanese dude. He would get so happy when he saw me. Always telling me about fishing trips and inviting me. One day he heard I was leaving back to the US. He was visibly sad. He began to tell me about how he used to live in New York and California. But he purposely overstayed his VISA. Because of that, he was barred from re-entry. He began to tell me how boring life was in Japan and how the culture made him feel dead inside. The last time he felt alive was 25 years ago, when he was a 25 year old in the US studying. I think about him all the time when people try gloating about how "perfect" Japan is. Honestly, after this video, I think I need to find his email again and reach out. I feel like a POS for not doing so at the time and only thinking about it now. I was caught up in my own world. Something as basic as "Hey man, let's keep in touch" would have gone a long way. Men struggle a lot in Japan and it can be rough. That said, if any Japanese homies need a friend or contact when visiting SoCal (California), message me here or on Instagram (@sinlow_music just shoot me a message) & I'll 1000% be your tour guide. Be safe and remember the grass isn't greener on the other side. It's green where you water it.

[@Whodat-te6pn]

That last line hits deep

[@BibosToys]

sending you and mr fujita some love

[@Whodat-te6pn]

@@workshop1668 You think that until you leave the US for a few years. Then you’ll understand what he’s saying in a painful way. By all means try it, it adds character. And there ARE better countries than the US. It’s just Japan isn’t always one

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment.

[@ReggieSanchez23]

@@workshop1668I’m sure I know why

[@mrd9421]

I turned 50 this year, and sometimes I feel the same way. Life is about choices and goals; we navigate from one objective to another, all while trying to survive in this chaotic world. I've changed my way of living many times. I'm South American and tried to work there for many years. After that, I lived in Japan for 5 years as I am of Japanese descent. I worked in assembly lines and other jobs at factories and tried to open my own business. I failed a couple of times and gave up on the idea of living in Japan as I didn't see myself 'progressing' in my life. Now I've been living in Australia for about 15 years. When I arrived here, I didn't speak any English, but I worked my way up from an English school to earning my PhD. I worked in several jobs (cleaner, laborer, driver, etc.) to pay my bills because I knew this was the only way I had to reach my goal. There was a sense of accomplishment after finishing my doctorate. Now, I am teaching at a university here. However, despite all these 'victories,' at the same time, I feel an immense emptiness. In just one month, I'll become a father, and I feel a bit lost. I'm trying to organize my thoughts because I know my family depends on me to keep going. The cost of living here has skyrocketed, and I continue receiving the same wage. I need a break, but I can't take one. Unfortunately, life is this way. So many things that we cannot control. So, to sum up, I won't give up, and neither should you. You'll find the motivation, just like I will find mine! Cheers!!

[@human-ft3wk]

Amazing, what do you teach?

[@blackcurrantpop]

Thanks for sharing. Amazing story! I think you need another big challenge in your life.

[@mrd9421]

@@human-ft3wk IT subjects

[@mrd9421]

@@blackcurrantpop sure!👍👍

[@4hyc]

also in aussie (your english is superb by the way!) and cost of living has definitely gone up :(( hope you're holding up okay, i'm sure the uni kids who learn from you are blessed!

[@mattparr3038]

Another thing is, this point in time we are exposed to news and social media, we see all the negative news in a clump! Sometimes its best to switch off and go for a walk in nature. Focus on the good in your own life.

[@askjapan9669]

Wow, thanks

[@yamondakawazuki8941]

It’s not that the younger generation doesn’t care about politics, they mostly see it as exploitation for money, discouraged from participating from the powerless feeling thinking about it gives them, I am sure they aren’t alone. Your English is very good brother, thank you for speaking on this.

[@brandonlovatt]

I think many people around the world resonate with what you have said in this video. I'm a 34 year old living in Houston, Texas and I feel the same way as you have described. In fact, most everyone that I know feels this way. The toxic political climate, economic issues seem to put such a weight on everyone that it's difficult to not feel emptiness. People want to live happy lives, but we have so many distractions and responsibilities that it's almost impossible to catch a break. Even in our news we have to decipher what the truth is... it's exhausting. I appreciate the genuine video, and I'm glad that it was suggested to me. You don't see too many of these types of videos on social media anymore!

[@gentronseven]

you may not like the choice between Trump and the establishment but the republican party is basically entirely reforming because of the economic climate, and the establishment is attacking Trump because of the threat his followers represents. If the world weren't in such a bad economic situation, the politics wouldn't be the way they are.

[@prairiewolfedogg]

Hello Brandon, I also have lived in Houston but left 15 years ago. Terrible place to live - the crime, politics, traffic, weather, the city is broke, etc. Even now, my heart goes out to those residents that once more are trapped in a 500-year flood that seems to fall on Houston every couple of years. I hope that you can escape that place of tropical depression. Not the full answer, of course, but it is a good start.

[@bigchief2331]

I am 31 in Sydney Australia and utterly fed up with everything. All I want is community and connection with people and nature, and that's impossible to find in this crazy modern world.

[@ernstthalmann4306]

I'm in NYC, and it's hell unless you're a billionaire. This sucks!

[@alanm6o9]

This has become very common after everyone took the vaccseen. Either yall are starting to regret you took it or its lowkey effecting you. People arent the same as even last year

[@stephenallen224]

Having lived and worked in your country for a while as a foreigner, I am surprised you are just feeling this at 50. Japanese work culture is so extreme, it forces the individual to give up their life. The irony is you're surrounded by people all the time but it still feels so isolating...

[@arewealone9969]

@@DanielRumbacheri do the same as middle class, living the dream they say. I’m glad I have a roof over my head but my days are spent working then home. Which I’m totally fine with but the work culture of 9-5 is such a backwards thing to have you work your life only to enjoy retirement on your last legs.

[@stephenallen224]

@@DanielRumbacher Japan is much worse than you can imagine. You have time after work to read? A Japanese man does not. You are at work from early in the morning to late in the night all week long, when you get off work you are forced to immediately attend the mandatory afterwork drinking and social activities with your boss and other employees. If you fail to, you are not a team player and risk your career prospects. Some men don't even make it home at night. It's so bad at times that Japanese companies will arrange relationship partners for you because you don't have time for that either.

[@jeremyjackson7429]

@@stephenallen224 In Taiwan, many companies have these things called "make up days". If a nationwide holiday falls on a weekday, workers are expected to make up for it by coming in on a Saturday or Sunday. But yeah, sh*t sucks.

[@HiddenWen]

It's the same in China too.

[@oranges557]

​@@DanielRumbachermore hours at the job, wether effective working time or wasted time, is a nightmare. Id rather work a few hours intesively and get the hell out than doing nothing for 12 hours

[@lvminh]

I’ve just reached my 43, a divorced man with no kid. So far to me is fantastic to me as I’m learning how to cherish moments in life. I understand when I reach your age, physical & mental change may make us feel most challenging time in life. So, I guess that is part of our life that we need to be through. Thanks for sharing. I can tell that you’re a good man & I wish you well to get through hard times!

[@bunnycat195]

Thank you for your honestly and rawness. I grew up in rural California, and nearly half of my classmates were 1st or 2nd generation Japanese-American. I remain close to many of them to this day, and I cherish the preciousness of our friendships. I am a female in my 60s, retired, and divorced with no children. Please stop watching the news for a moment, and join a dance class. It will change your life, and you will meet so many wonderful people, plus it's so amazing for your mental and physical health. I have been dancing for 20 yrs, and have not experienced a moment of boredom since then.

[@askjapan9669]

Wow, thanks

[@REZZA2020]

Im 45 without children. I understand your sentiments. What keeps me going is my interior life and niche interests. Spirituality also very important. I led a very adverse and narrow life experience. It is no better here in Australia. I wish you all the best. Try not to allow news and economy to upset and demoralise

[@tongobong1]

I am 45 and also without children and it is the same here in Slovenia - EU. It keeps me going when I try really hard to find the way to get women in my life. After trying so many things I am finally on something...

[@Rx79100]

Wish you keep your interest , take care , I got some problems as well but still keep going

[@DocumentingReality-ol9es]

@@Goodman849 seems that the likes of sunak and johnson love ukranians more than their own citizens. but these people have no concept of real life, a bit like king charles who got diagnosed at a private clinic on harley street. they did not have to ring a GP in the morning and try to get through triage by reception...

[@klirmio21]

Do you guys regret having no children at 45? I’m 26, and I feel like I’m gonna be without children as we’ll, or a partner

[@Goodman849]

I'm 43. Had 2 young girls. Yet the abusive mother abducted them to another country so they cannot see me. That's very painful. In my case no kids would have been less painful. No woman would have been less pain. The only positive reproduction genetic legacy. On balance you could argue better off not. Women really can hide who they really are long enough to get what they want. Like Jekyll and Hyde ​@@klirmio21

[@samagatsu1]

We need to work productively for 4 days on monday to Thursday and rest for 3 days (hobbies, passion,celebration with friends) from Friday to Sunday this should be the new norm. Who's on board?

[@fujithegreat6069]

I'm on board. The board of directors from major corporations would not, sadly.

[@samagatsu1]

@@fujithegreat6069 of course they won't cause they too greedy and use fear tactics propaganda to divide and prevent us from developing our potential but if we are the majority pushing this new norm they will no choice then to submit to our will soon or later.

[@samagatsu1]

Of course they won't cause they too greedy using fear tactics propaganda to divide and prevent us from developing our potential but if we are the majority pushing this new norm they will have no choice then to submit to our will soon or later.

[@hmq9052]

You're fired.

[@ZelenoJabko]

Are you willing to accept 20% paycut? Besides, many employers already offer 80% or 60% workweek upon request in an exchange for a smaller salary.

[@harveyking5038]

Most people don't meditate. Once you do daily meditation every morning the outside world doesn't affect you much at all. Peace and happiness is within but most people are too busy watching screens all day. i'm 52, here in Australia. yesterday afternoon i played soocer. Today i might go to the gym. I have too much energy but most people my age will be sitting home all day thinking why their life is so boring !

[@ManicMayhem90]

Loneliness is a huge huge problem in U.S.A for those aged 50+

[@iv2sab512]

@tikkiu7345 Potatoes

[@tim_despair]

I'm 33 now, Russian man, I know it might be different when I'm 50 but I believe a lot of unhappiness and lack of satisfaction comes from a few things: 1. High expectations. If you wanted something unreasonable in the first place, you'll suffer immensely, so we create unhappiness in our mind ourselves 2. Success ideology. People are infected with an idea that they should be successful businessmen and reach lots of things by a certain age. This is a kind of indocrination. People should find their own values in life, even if it's small like caring after animals/family/videogames 3. Political indocrination. I suppose that one is clear.

[@askjapan9669]

Wow, thanks

[@chevy4x466]

People r spoiled. I am a 53 man in America. I have a modern dead end job where I make good money for what I do. However, my role is beta at work. Many of my coworkers find it soul crushing. I am a casino worker. The way I look at it is it is my job to have fun and enjoy every day. This is a choice. No doubt life is not as exciting as it was for me at 20. Get over it. Our lives are short. If u r bored, u won’t be here much longer anyway

[@chevy4x466]

@tikkiu7345 I often consider layoffs. I have many alternate plans. I would easily land on my feet and be probably making twice the money. I am raising kids. The project soon completed, I have one more payment on my house. My job has been good, I enjoy it. My point is eventually people make a choice to be happy or not. I choose to enjoy my life, not envy what another may have

[@miriamvivo4279]

Especially in japan and USA

[@evaburnz]

Your country is under authoritarian rule. I feel sad for Russians.

[@kidanaoki1947]

Y'all let's all support this man, everyone comment to make this video go viral 💪

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. I will do my best

[@rainniwkw]

❤

[@livannal.t.9068]

agreed

[@eyeashl]

let’s go!!! (my great grandpa who fought for the US in WWII doesn’t agree tho)

[@ernstthalmann4306]

In America people feel the same way.

[@user-rg4ez2ru2i]

Thoughtful and insightful look into your life, thank you for sharing! I’m pushing 60 and have had a great life though many challenges like everyone else, also I’d say I have had luck with me. No abuse, no mental health issues, semi normal family etc..This is a huge topic, worthy of like an online forum or chat series. I think each person has things that could help them along the journey, unique to them. Learning who you really are helps everyone yet is elusive. Connecting with the divine is critical, not religion, but divinity …love rules all sounds cliche but is so true. Getting a life long or new hobby / pursuit that you really enjoy also helps. Being in nature, taking extra self care during the day like maybe looking at beautiful photos or art. All the small things re define your mood and happiness… hope that helps a little!

[@RichardCookphotography]

Hi. Im 50 too and have 2 young kids like you. I am from the U.K but have lived in Tokyo then Okinawa for 20 years with my Japanese wife and kids. I totally understand your perspective having lived in Japan for so long. Happiness can be difficult for some people living in Japan...but change is always possible no matter how old you are. Your life could have been shit and monotonous for decades....doesn't mean it has to be tomorrow or the day after. I am a big advocate of having a hobby. I am also taking my kids to gakudo ( after school ) and football club everyday and weekend but I love photography and make sure when they are playing football I get in an hour or 2 of photography. I love meeting my friends at the weekend and going drinking at Izakayas, I left my family and long term friends back in the U.K but strive to enjoy my life here. You say you don't have depression and I believe you, but I feel you could do more to make your own life better. Just because 40 something percent have the same feelings doesn't mean that's it..case closed... it's impossible to change. It is totally possible to change starting today or tomorrow, next week...do something different, be proactive. I really hope you find something that brings you happiness...if not get down to Okinawa for a weekend...I'll take you out and show a good time!!!💪👍

[@chadsensei-ue6jn]

I've found the best way to keep it all in perspective is to garden, growing new life and being in tune with the seasons.

[@ReallyfastwindsUnbelievable]

I've just started doing that, I have beetroot, broad beans, spring onions and corn. They've only just sprouted but there's something so pleasant about seeing little stems break the soil.

[@chadsensei-ue6jn]

@@ReallyfastwindsUnbelievable My garden theme this year is exotic melons. I have 5 different varieties planted.

[@StevenSantaCruz-ix9is]

Interesting

[@joaolopes1211]

Actually, I did the same, that's funny

[@Betty-my3tw]

Definitely. Spending time in nature is always so invigorating.

[@dombaker1924]

This gentleman's generation was the lost generation in Japan. His life was likely a significant struggle with little capacity for joy or optimism. But I'm glad he has a family, that can be a source of joy when you need it most. Stay strong brother.

[@amiwho3464]

What happened to his generation?

[@shaheedharun445]

His generation never discovered LSD

[@TaiyouArt]

@@shaheedharun445 hell yea I loved california lots of tripping

[@shaheedharun445]

@@TaiyouArt i lived in southern Cal, but found more acid in Virginia

[@ToTheStumblBloc]

Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your thoughts and feelings and for speaking with integrity. It is good for people to hear these words.

[@theamericanenglishtutor1500]

I am soon to be 44 this May. How I get through life as a single woman is my faith, it makes me feel important and keeps my mind right. I walk through this life as a test and work hard to get to my true destination.

[@askjapan9669]

thanks for your comment.

[@LonLonRanchDressing]

I watch a lot of “what it’s like to live in Japan” videos; most of them glowingly positive. This is an important reminder that life happens to you everywhere, even in Japan.

[@maalikserebryakov]

Life everywhere is basically the same game if friends, money, hobbies, work, etc. Different lands bring Just a change of scenery nothing more nothing less

[@spinnetti]

For sure. We bring ourselves to every situation, and a place is just a place. Japan is interesting and I've been there several times for work, but no way I'd want to live there. Too much city and too many people.

[@sweetXroll]

@@maalikserebryakov True that the "game" is the same anywhere, but some countries or regions have different work cultures. For example in Japan and China, the extreme work culture doesn't allow for people to have much of a life outside of work. It has some very negative effects on the general population.

[@frederikbh1]

*Capitalism* happens to you everywhere, *especially* in Japan

[@prairiewolfedogg]

@@frederikbh1 And a lot more BAD life happens to you in places where capitalism is suppressed.

[@ykjali]

hey man, im a teenager but ive noticed that my parents went through the midlife crisis phase. they ended up finding hobbies to both stay fit and enjoy themselves a bit more. now theyre going on walks every day for 30 minutes and play badminton every weekend and ive noticed how theyre feeling better. another thing that ive learned is that japan has an overworking problem, meaning that you wake up, eat, go to work, come back home, sleep. you basically have no hobbies and therefore often no social life. the social life you usually have is in bars really drunk. in my opinion, "healthier" hobbies other than drinking should be normalised like mountain biking, hiking, and more to improve the social problems for Japanese citizens. another thing that should be normalised is shorter workdays since overworking is so normal there which ive mentioned previously. with the increased amount of free time, people can find hobbies which would both drive the economy stronger since consumerism has been increased to fill the longer times off work and make the people happier. edit: as someone pointed out, the reason i mentioned hiking and mountain biking/biking is because japan, in general, has very varied terrain which would make such activities both fun and challenging. even if you prefer to bike around more active places (cities, towns), japan has good infrastructure for biking so it shouldn't really be an issue there.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. Walking is nice idea because many elderly start when they turn 50-60

[@amineouerdani8692]

and also the overworking is draining the person physically and mentally the whole week , which doesnt give any space to enough rest and then doing some interesting activities in the weekend or even during the week as a whole

[@benhallo1553]

Walking and badminton sounds so boring

[@grifyn882]

@@benhallo1553 I can swear to you that playing badminton is very funny and can be violent, you move very fast and you have to get great reflex...but yes, walking can be boring

[@theo7049]

@@benhallo1553 You should try it. Nature walks, pick up a sport or something. It is very relaxing and good both mentally and physically for you.

[@theNeathBoy]

Your candidness is very enlightening, it gives me, a bloke from Wales, a perspective that we’re very much the same the world over, the same frustrations and challenges half a world away. Diolch yn fawr.

[@NoToBigBro]

Famous US author, and considered to be one of the smartest persons in the world at the time, Mark Twain said... "There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will." He also said connecting with nature makes people happy... it's in our nature.

[@maachan711]

I'm a foreigner from the US currently living and working here in Hokkaido in one of those 'disappearing' cities you mentioned. The population in my town is less than 5,000 people. To be honest there is not much fun stuff to do here, most ppl are either young kids or elderly, and some Hokkaido people are not that friendly to foreigners. Life here has been hard and lonely. I'm ready to move to a bigger city like in Osaka or Kanagawa. I'm grateful for my job and having a roof over my head, but my circumstances have seriously affected my mental health. It's comforting to know there are ppl who are experiencing similar things. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and hope you can find joy and fulfillment in your life.

[@perc-ai]

u are not alone bro

[@icwiener9935]

is moving back to the US not an option?

[@SqueakyJpn]

I moved from a small dead town in rural Japan to Tokyo and it was the best thing ever for my mental heath lmao

[@Crouton-]

​@@icwiener9935Why would someone leave an entire country because they live in a small town? Maybe they're in that country because they like it, otherwise they wouldn't be looking at big cities as alternatives to live in.

[@kingdom2532]

​@@icwiener9935returning to the US is always an option, just a very bad one.

[@slangelands4255]

I think Marcus Aurelius said something like, "The quality of your thoughts determines the quality of your life." Mid life crisis is extremely common. We discover that all we strived for when younger is not as fulfilling as we thought. Our thoughts determine our perspectives on life. Unfortunately, we have been brainwashed by tradition and societal norms that if you do this you will be happy ever after and if not, you are a failure. You must investigate these biases, determine whether they are appropriate to you personally, and then go on a self reflective journey to find out what is most important to you. This is not easy. Second, bad news is part of life and completely out of your control. Accept it and realize that mainstream media only shows you a tiny tiny fraction of reality. Extreme negativity is as delusional as extreme optimism. Reality is vastly more nuanced. Best wishes to you. ❤

[@eazydp]

!00%

[@jackmiddleton2080]

This comment might be good for the video creator but for most people they just desire the fundamentals of life and they are being denied. It is really not a matter of quality of thoughts for them. As Chappelle said: Go tell a starving child that his problem is that he has a bad attitude about starving to death.

[@Brian-vk1hm]

The Buddha knew the same stuff.

[@ghoulbby]

@@jackmiddleton2080 I have noticed that many people in these countries, regardless of their situation, are often laughing and happy with a very tight knit community. Their life is a continuous struggle but many of them find comfort in each other. Sure, some are in total despair but that's not "most people". There are decades of research out there into this and even today, with the happiness index, we see many poor countries at the top of that list. Obviously, they have a mountain of problems but for the most part, finding happiness in life isn't one of them.

[@jackmiddleton2080]

@@ghoulbby Right, because evolution prepared us for certain hardships but it never prepared us to work in a factory and live alone.

[@lexluong8155]

I find new hobbies to do and learn. I currently learning Chinese online. I go hiking and mushroom foraging. I grow mushrooms and grow things in the garden. I have a job that I work from home and office. When I go to office I spend money on delicious food and drink. Enjoy the little things and have open mind.

[@askjapan9669]

thanks for your comment.

[@linden5576]

My husband, what is 32 and I was 25. He was was successful in real estate and also drove a truck over the road for a huge company. I was in college. He had never married and had no any children. He lived with a few girls off and on before. I rented an apartment from him in a downtown area near college. That’s when we met! He said I was different from the other women, I liked the simple life and I wasn’t into all of the radical stuff that was going on at the time and he liked the fact that I was a homebody not a partier. I knew what I wanted, I wanted a stable life and relationship with somebody who wanted the same. He wanted the same things I wanted. So I started helping him getting to know him and eventually we moved in together and a few years later we married. That was in 1993! We had a family and because he was a truck driver I become a truck driver and I’m not, a big manly woman by any means! We eventually helped balance each other. He was a musician at one time playing drums. He eventually or I talked him into it, to purchase drums and start playing again. So he did he didn’t play out at any clubs? It was just something fun for him to do before our first son come along. When our son was three years old, he picked up a newspaper out of the ditch and saw a boombox and said daddy. This is what I want for my upcoming birthday! Well, it turns out that by the age of 12, our son receives his first guitar, the same as my husband did when he was 12! Life went on and we had a boat and we went to the lake for years. We had wave runners motorhomes. We traveled all over and camped. We did everything every weekend that we could and we enjoyed it then about 15 years later my husband decided you know he’s gonna get into golf. My husband was a sports coach because our son played sports early in school and so my husband would coach the team in football and basketball well her son was growing up. It turns out our son was musical inclined and he and dad, started playing music and instruments and buying equipment and learning multiple instruments and then by the time our son was 16, they were ready to play out so they played many venues and clubs. Hired the drummer. It was so much fun and this went on up into, my son was 25. We purchased a motorhome and planned on going to California and here and there and I was just the wife tagging along to help drive and take care of things and keep things good for them and cooking clean and whatever and enjoy life with my son and husband, take care of our dog. Well, that day never came.😢 my husband was diagnosed with cancer terminal cancer and lived for less than two years after his diagnosis and surgery. We were devastated, totally devastated. Not only did. I lose the love of my life, but my son lost his dad, his friend, his music partner😢 now our son is trying to pick up his life and decide what do I do? Music is his soul. He plays five instruments and sings. I am retired now just over 60. I’m in enjoying my life doing what I wanna do. My family tried to get me to take care of my mom, but I said no she’s not my responsibility , she did not choose me to take care of her and I’m not gonna be her last resort. I have a life that means something I am valuable. I am important and demand respect. I live in my body and I have a right to choose my future and destination. There’s plenty of other children to take care of mom and mom shouldn’t need to be taken care of anyway she has Social Security put her in a nursing home when I get old. I don’t expect my kids to take care of me. I will stay in an apartment for as long as I can, and then if necessary, I’ll go into a nursing home and then on the hospice and probably pass away, any husband or anybody else to take care of me? It’s not another person’s responsibility to take care of me! It’s my responsibility to set myself up and go wherever I need to go for my elderly care. other people are not responsible for our happiness! We are responsible for what we want what we need in our own happiness and destination a partner is not responsible for that, but a spouse is responsible for their wife or husband Lee duties to their spouse. Those are your vows . but it doesn’t mean you have to spend the rest of your life taking care of someone when you’re 80 years old and your spouse is 80 years old and you can’t hardly get out of bed to your spouse at that point they need to go into a nursing home. That’s what nursing homes are for. Choose a good one! If you have enough money and you want to have a caregiver come in and take care of them in your home and go that route! Our children are not, are not responsible to take care of us! And shame on the parent who tries to make their child feel guilty for not doing it! Are other family members have justice right as we do, to live their life to the fullest doing what they want with their life. We were all given one life to live to the best of our ability and nobody else owes us anything for that just because you decide to take care of somebody doesn’t mean that person turn around take care of you so don’t expect him to., pay your own way and your own end of life. I was depressed after my husband passed. I tried to fill the void by buying jewelry that didn’t do it, buying clothes that didn’t do it buying expensive items, that didn’t do it, and then I realize that none of these things are going to fill the void of losing my husband . I learned to be content and find the things and do the things that make me happy and day-to-day life as a retired person in my early 60s.. Life is good again! I don’t date. I haven’t been with another man and I have no intentions of it. Relationships come with demand and I like to do things at my own pace! And if I don’t feel like going, I’m not gonna go or if I, feel like changing my mind I’m going to change my mind! I don’t make plans anymore. I just go as I feel and what I wanna do for the day or the week and I enjoy life just it’s getting up yawning and saying what would I like to do today!and that’s how I live my life. It’s perfect for me.😅 I do have two small little dogs that I love.😊 so every one of us have a right to map out our own future as an individual person. We don’t owe anyone anything! It’s us to us to set us up for our future or our old age, not depending on somebody else to be our caregiver in our family, such as our spouse,children or parents. Now, obviously if you decide, hey, I’m gonna take care of this person. That’s your choice. That’s what you decide to do with your life is to be a caregiver. That’s perfectly fine. It’s your choice. 😊 life is good. I am happy and content I’ve even took up some studies and received certificates and diplomas! And I did it with no pressure from others or children or spouses or anyone else demands of a job, etc..😅

[@breeze_japanese]

日本人が公の場で直接発言するのは珍しい。とても良いお話しだと思います。

[@rainniwkw]

❤

[@matheuszallera]

I know this is cultural, but this is a problem, you need to talk, helps a lot

[@hevnervals]

Same here in Norway. I think it's mostly an Anglosphere thing, and I think they got it right.

[@ilyas200017]

そうですね珍しい!それが変わることを願っています

[@user-cp3ip3rw7r]

日本人てこうやって動画でしゃべらないですよね。シバターくらいか

[@AfroSnackey]

I visited Tokyo last December and one thing I can say for sure is that people are the same no matter where you go. When I go to work in New York I like to look at peoples' faces in the morning when nobody is watching and the stress of going back to work after a day off is universal lmao.

[@askjapan9669]

True

[@JJPelszynski]

Thanks for making this video. Mid life crises is a real thing and from my experience, 45yrs old living in the US, stepping outside of your comfort zone zone as often as possible can make a huge difference in one’s quality of life. Don’t be afraid of trying new things, meeting new people. No, the current economy doesn’t help and the news is always bad but don’t focus on those things and get creative. Keep moving ahead! 😊

[@musclemarchfitness9931]

I can relate to this, I also have unsure feelings like “is this it?” and I feel like there should be more.

[@gprufino]

I visited Tokyo last year and felt that most folks around me on the train, train stations, and just people walking around were stressed, unhappy, and depressed. Not a lot of happy faces except for a few young women laughing on the streets.

[@comsuonkhi]

and that few young women are from another country

[@Bahamut998]

"except for a few young women laughing on the streets." Scary but this is why Asian men who go amok often attack women. There was a guy making the same remark in Korea who said "I attacked them because they looked happy". Very unhappy men taking out their anger, feeling society has fcked them.

[@sdsddai]

I used to live in tokyo but now I'm out. Now I'm living in the rural area with my own family and my parents and feeling happier at the moment.

[@Bahamut998]

It's insane how so many comments got deleted. Censorship is real by video author.

[@user-qm7jw]

According to United Nations statistics, the happiness level of Japanese women is quite high. The suicide rate, death rate from overwork, and depression rate are all much higher for Japanese men than for Japanese women.

[@amishmafia2800]

We gotta enjoy what we got while we have it, your a good man and you got us watching and supporting you. Stay strong brother.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. It may be just one time bad mood but 50's must be very difficult time in our lives.

[@dianadobos1045]

@@askjapan9669 I am 47 years old and I havenot kids and I am feeling good.

[@ThatGBAGamer]

@@askjapan9669 Its a culmination of all of your choices and the lack of freedom you are left with in that short time until retirement. I can only imagine the thought process. I hope you find a hobby to love and enjoy your life, you've worked so hard.

[@amywest7093]

The problems that you speak of are happening in the UK too. No confidence or trust in government, a decline in living standards for most people on average to low incomes, businesses closing down, full time, non agency work difficult to find..hard to see a bright future for my grandchildren. Many people feel as you do, myself included. We can only hope things get better in the future

[@askjapan9669]

thanks for your comment.

[@BigSpoonGaming]

Thanks for your honesty and for being vulnerable. Its rare to find that nowadays. I understand how you feel. For me, it seems like life was amazing being a kid throughout school when we had more friends to hang around with and do fun stuff on a regular basis with them. The hard part of getting older is that we lose friends and its hard to gain new friends as we age. Im the type of person that puts forth effort to maintain friendships and make new ones but i find that many others dont make the same effort. People flake out or they dont reach out like i do. I think relationships are very important for a joyful life. Without friendships, we can feel lonely and things arent as fun to do without friends. If i lived in Japan, we would be friends and have a good time hanging out. Just know you arent alone. Theres many people struggling with the same thing. Lets make an effort to reach out to each other and extend love to one another. Be kind to people you meet in public and extend your friendship to others. They may seem ok on the outside but on the inside they might feel lonely, depressed, and empty. Extending love and kindness to them can do wonders.

[@lazarusblackwell6988]

Boredom is a civilizational disease. Ive lived in the wild and i can tell you i havent had a single boring day. People are trained to do one thing. Be consumers. Go to shopping malls or internet websites and just spend money. So no wonder we feel empty inside.

[@Johnnyvtg]

I feel like boredom is a complicated topic. I feel like if you're trying to "cure" it (usually by consuming digital media), your life becomes more boring than ever, but if you become comfortable with being bored, you'll inevitably arouse your creativity and make your life more interesting.

[@lazarusblackwell6988]

@@Johnnyvtg Its not complicated.Boredom comes from living a unnatural life.

[@lazarusblackwell6988]

@@Johnnyvtg Yeah im not sure how people become "comfortable" with boredom.

[@jackdunn3235]

Agree. Many countries are over developed.

[@aicelsmash1168]

Living in the wild sounds like fun, and, "Yeah, I'm not sure how people become 'comfortable' with boredom." Once you reach higher levels of consciousness and realize that you have come here to experience the world, every and any situation, no matter how important, how small or big it is, boredom disappears. You begin to understand that all experiences are equal; we are the ones "scoring" different situations as better or worse than others, but in reality, it's all the same. It's all you experiencing the world in different manners or aspects. Rather than viewing life through the lens of mundane tasks or tedious moments, you begin to see each experience as an opportunity for growth and understanding. This shift in perception allows you to embrace even the seemingly mundane aspects of life with a sense of wonder and appreciation. Moreover, this realization challenges the notion of boredom itself. Instead of seeing boredom as an inherent feature of certain situations, you recognize it as a byproduct of your own perception. By understanding that every experience contributes to your personal journey and growth, you can transcend the limitations of boredom and find fulfillment in even the simplest of moments. Furthermore, this perspective encourages a deeper connection with the world around you. Rather than seeking out excitement or novelty to escape boredom, you learn to find beauty and meaning in the present moment. Whether it's observing the intricate patterns of nature or reflecting on the complexities of human interaction, every experience becomes an opportunity for self-discovery and connection. Also i could say that Boredom represents the concept of not being fully awake in this world, once you are fully awake you no longer need to seek out for nothing, as the world around you is no longer interesting you realise that what trully "matters" is in the spiritual realm, right next to the "source of all creation". This is just a phase to be experienced, to learn and grow from, so nothing is really boring maybe you need to slow down you mind ^_^.

[@uyennguyenmaiphuong9310]

This is so insightful. I follow many foreign KZbinrs making videos about Japan but they only talk about the good things and that makes Japan look like heaven. Good to hear some honest words coming from a Japanese man.

[@vhwhite3337]

Thank you for your moving and emotionally honest video. I felt so sad when you said 'the people are suffocating.' It is great that you are addressing this type of feeling and so important to hear men, especially, speaking about how life is for them. I always find going to walk in nature helps me get perspective and is refreshing. Urban environments can be especially oppressive if there is no time for recuperation in nature. Good luck with everything.

[@annekristiina7503]

This is the first time I've seen a Japanese man speak honestly about his existence on KZbin. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I think we are soon going the same way as population decline is beginning in Europe too. Sweden where I reside has tried to welcome a large middle eastern and african immigrant wave, but I'm not sure that is going in our favor as we have imported a lot of drug gang violence in the process. All countries economies seem to be downhill right now. Young people can't afford the mortgages on homes, so how can they marry and have children? Having a family is becoming a luxury for well off people.

[@m0thdm]

Sendign you love man. Thank you for so much honesty. Also you look AMAZING for 50 dude WOW!

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. I will do my best

[@girthygumbolini882]

Thank you for sharing your experiences. You are very insightful and articulate.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment.

[@BMulligans]

This dude is a modern day hero! Love it! Keep up the great videos!

[@handleReallyDafaq]

Asian men are reserved and being told this is a good virtue to have. I am really happy to see some Asian men opening up. We are always here to listen and appreciate you and your sincerity.

[@ismaelkf]

Wow, thank you for sharing. I've been residing in Japan for six years already. Honestly, I feel the urge to travel elsewhere, or else I fear I might lose my sanity. There are moments when I question if I'm still human or simply functioning as an ATM. Perhaps it's time to embark on a journey.

[@consistenc51]

Hello Mr. AskJapan. I’m Japanese-American and in my mid-forties. I had a major panic attack two years ago and I think about mostly existential issues these days. Thank you for your video and I hope you can find some sort of “ikigai” or passion to help you through your life journey.

[@twnb7733]

Only the Christ can fill your emptiness. You live in America. Find Him when you can.

[@twnb7733]

“God, if you exist, I must know you. Save my soul, if I have one.” A prayer from an atheist Jew. The Christ answered her. You have a Creator and a Savior, do you know that?

[@lesbianmustardbottle957]

I get a lot of mileage out of the following quote: "It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society".

[@gamesyouloved]

Interesting story I’m 51 this year and have never been bored mainly as I pursue my own interests and find my own passions. Good luck with finding yourself

[@fernandomartinez8932]

Thanks for posting this. We all struggle when we have kids and life indeed can become very boring. What you need is hobbies. Something that is fun, that gets you out of the house and ideally something that helps you to exercise. It can be anything, but learning to play a sport is usually one of the best things you can do. Golf, tennis, table tennis, hiking, whatever. In my case, it was tennis. I joined a tennis club when my kids were small and it is the best thing I’ve done in my life. Made a lot of new friends and also playing club competitions. I play at least twice a week and keeps me fit and happy. Now started playing golf also. Can’t play much golf yet because it takes a long time, but hoping to play more often when my kids have grown up. Currently hitting balls in the range to get better so I can play decently when I have more time. I feel so sorry for all the people who have no hobbies or passions. I don’t know how they get through life.

[@drummerwizard]

That was a great video. Thank you. I'm 47 in Canada with Japanese wife. Lucky that my income is enough to pay bills. I also have a midlife crisis and I help it by learning something new and ignoring our idiot government, and always put some savings to gold/silver/platinum each paycheck. Learning small skills like sharpening knives or polishing my car makes me happy. I also started growing hot peppers inside my house with grow light. I like being totally carefree when we come to Japan every year. My kids are young, just 5 and 6. Hope you can find a cure for your melancholy. -Nick

[@JesusPeopleSF]

I believe boredom is a self-inflicted wound. Your advice here is criminally underrated. the solution to boredom is not working less, it's just working at some thing we want to do even if it seems trivial.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment.

[@egl3369]

I am in Australia and resonate with this. Our housing is so unaffordable, that most young people will rent their whole lives. They cannot afford children. So they wonder, why engage in the workforce when there is no reward? Why vote when all political parties are the same self serving boomers who don't care cause they got theirs? There is no hope

[@shirtlesslager]

Australia voted in a nanny state, but did not vote out brutal capitalism.

[@bigchief2331]

I am 31 and in Australia too. This place is nothing like it was when growing up. I have had a gutful of work too and ready to throw in the towel and just try to enjoy my life the best I can whilst everything else falls apart around me.

[@MrTalkingzero]

why is age significant? would you say that ww2 was started by a 50 year old?

[@investorbro21]

sounds just like america

[@jsan9389]

No offence tho you love in the most beautiful place you can try living in England it's 10 times more depressing

[@claudiabefeld1226]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and reflections with us. You touched me deeply and I feel with you so intensely. Don't give up, change! I did, too, at the very same age: Different job, started to articulate sadness, hopelessness, but also what makes me happy and joyful. I think change always starts with ourselves...the rest is to follow. But one thing is for sure: Life isn't perfect, for none of us. And it is sad that only from the age of about 50 we start to see clearly what we're missing: Love, affection, friendship. Go, go, go for it!!!

[@askjapan9669]

thansk

[@kevpage]

I love this guy, to pour out your heart in a public forum is a big thing to do, I’m sure he speaks for a lot of us

[@strongermedicine]

Your English is really impressive - this is really fascinating to hear, your honesty is very refreshing. The news cycle has a grim impact on people's psychological wellbeing. Try to give yourself the freedom and time to explore any activity or hobby that appeals to you. It's important to feel some creativity and autonomy from your own activities and pursuits in life too.

[@Johnnyvtg]

I'm studying both English and Japanese and interested in doing an exchange year in Japan, so I love listening to Japanese people who have just a normal Japanese accent speak English. Especially when the topic is also so relevant

[@dulcedeinvierno1]

HI! i have cronicle depression im well today but i been suffering very much,im a optimist person, im a dancer i see the beauty in the middle of the caos, and i try to embrasse the estoic and budist philosophy im from Argentina,so the economy here NEVER been estable. im 33 years old and sometimes i really want to quit this life,sometimes for the same as you,sometimes for the pain,but i think we are here to teach and learn from each other thats why inside of me im still be a child who works and plays. Never give up i you fall sometimes,get up and continue do your best and enjoy it, ENJOY IT . I really admire your country for the martial arts like Kendo ( im practice that) the discipline and the arts warms my soul. if you let me advice you,learn something new or try something diferent in your routine. ありがとう

[@spinnetti]

This happens to almost everybody. When you have met your early life goals, you have to set some new ones. I struggle with this too. Get outside.... take up running, cycling, Kendo or anything but move your body and get out in the fresh air somewhere. Its hard to be bored when fully physically active.

[@trqster]

Great candid conversation. I'm almost 50 and my life is all but dull ... On a personal level I focus on getting on the best physical level I can, I'm probably the fittest I've ever been and that makes me feel great at a time when most of my same age friends have, unfortunately, left themselves go. Regular exercise is absolutely essential for a man imo. Other than that I left my old job and am now an entrepreneur - it's challenging but certainly makes you feel alive every single day! I also still go out to venues and events to socialize and meet new people, most younger and that keeps myself both up to date and energizes, both a problem when you get middle aged. Finally value your family and spend not a great amount of time with them, but focus on quality time. That's all folks.

[@hyd119]

I appreciate your reflection and insight. Arigato gozaimasu. Thank you. Tell your family hello from 🇺🇸

[@ivanthaboi]

No idea how i found this as a 17 year old in Sweden but sucks to see that the older generations are struggling as well. A lot of gen-z likes to think that life is soooo much easier for people born before us but apparently it's always been hard for most people unless you're born into wealth. Good luck man and i hope you find something you enjoy doing!

[@jimb12312]

Life can be hell even for those born into wealth. I saw a documentary about young adults born into billionaire families. They grew up getting everything they wanted and waste all their time partying and have no real purpose or meaning in life. Depressed alcoholics.

[@PS-lv1mr]

@@jimb12312I’m not religious but I understand why people are. Life feels utterly meaningless sometimes.

[@duanescot]

I wouldn't say people had it easier, but I would say that it was "easier" to find meaning, and they, and my generation to a large extent, lived much more in tune with "natural order", I feel bad for Gen Z, way too sheltered by helicopter parents and the level of state sponsored brainwashing they throw at your guys is shocking...

[@Samsaraindo]

Things were easier before Gen Z (trust me, I am an older millineal, just turned 40) but Japan is a special case where the bad things happening in the west already started much earlier in Japan.

[@WTHenry2023]

We are all struggling with the dystopian world that has emerged over the last 30 years. I am a younger boomer and, even though I am in ok shape financially and have hobbies, it is depressing how disconnected people have become from each other when connection is the key to a joyful life. Life is meaningless without connection to our fellow human beings. I saw this change start at the end of the 80's and slowly lead to where we are now lamenting the decline the whole way. My only advice to my younger Swedish brother is to try to find people you can develop a deep connection with and you will have a meaningful life regardless of the noise around you. Be well.

[@bingkk]

This dude has a real niche - giving the whole world an true instrospective insight into the life of a middleaged japanese salary man. That is rare cos a) english is not well spoken in Japan and b) it is not japanese culture to open up, especially among the older generation Hope my man gets to 1mil subs

[@laurenm.6320]

I’m a pretty content person in my mid-40s except I do worry that I am becoming a boring person to be around. My husband does a great job of finding hobbies and having interesting things to talk about. I’ve been thinking about my own conversational skills and what I’m going to do to be sure I stay engaged in more than becoming someone who only has daily irritations and medical conditions to talk about like too many older people. 😅 This stage of life is definitely an adjustment and one we want to go through thoughtfully to set ourselves up for a happy and healthy next stage. We can do this!

[@Makie.2001]

I'm 22 years old from Serbia, and I feel like you, I basically have long and boring average day, sometimes I think I'm an old man in a young man's body. I used to be much more socially active before the pandemic, and after high school, I enrolled in a university, studying history every day. I wish I had a girlfriend or close friends, but that's basically impossible from me at this time, because I'm so much busy. BTW, I've checked your channel, and you have wonderful content there, sir. You still have bright future, with your wife and children; try to guide your children into becoming better at handling life crises, many parents seem not to focus at that at all. You will not regret it. Also, I subscribed to your channel. Wish you the best!

[@joaolopes1211]

You need a bigger purpose. I bet you have a dream (like everyone) that you never worked 100% hard on. If you be honest to yourself and realize which dream it is, and finally commit to it, then you rekindle your life. I am betting on your success, cause if you are here watching videos and feel the same way as this guy, you are already onto something

[@quadders9198]

Hey bro I was scrolling down the comments and saw your post and I felt like replying as my mum is Serbian but I am born in London and I can say most people here in the UK live the same life you describe in Serbia. Something has definitely happened everywhere. It's all become work and paying bills here and has definitely become worse since the pandemic. The UK used to have a lot more joy and life but it has disappeared. A few small percent of people in central London have great lives but for most it has become a daily boring chore. Many people are not happy here anymore, many Brits are leaving for Asia or somewhere else. All I want to say is there are definitely other people out there all over the world thinking the same way. Take care and all the best.

[@Makie.2001]

@@quadders9198 Thanks for comfort, I actually feel better now as I'm writing this

[@user-yw8qf8cc3t]

😅

[@NonEducatedDelinquent]

Hi, Croatian here. I'm surprised by your comment cause when I was travelling around Serbia people seemed happier and more friendly than in Croatia. I left Croatia and realised happiness is within you. Just need to try different things. Don't worry too much if you're 22 though. I was struggling in my 20s and have just started to figure it out now at 32. If you have an open mind and resist the distractions it's never too late turning your life around. Good luck bro 🍀

[@Max-hr1ch]

I understand what you are saying. Finding your purpose in life can be a life-long quest. Many of us never “find it”. You are not alone. Try to spend more time with your children, go to the park or library. They grow up so quickly, it may not feel like that now but blink and they are teenagers, not too interested in hanging out with The Parents. Which is OK, they should be out socializing with their friends. So try to be with them now. Find a hobby or interest that you enjoy and feels fulfilling. Yes, the value of the yen is dropping and daily life might feel boring and uninteresting, so find your own path (you are a father), something that sparks your interest. Best of luck to you.

[@charlotteverch2766]

Happiness comes within. Life isn’t always a party. If you’re single you’re wanting to be in a relationship. Your in relationship you want to be single. Have special dates with your wife. Just because you become mother and father you can’t stop dating her. Don’t have to spend money. Don’t let life pull you apart. The U.S. is expensive also. We pay high prices for health care. It’s tough every where

[@kevpage]

I find it lovely that this post has allowed and encouraged men and woman in a similar mindset to open up and discuss to us all

[@bw5277]

My first time to Japan last week. My observations especially in the cities, adults seemed rushed, tired, unhappy, and stressed. Also, school aged children hurrying to get to school and then long ride home on trains. Not a happy place, I am thinking most in the outlying areas have more relaxed and happier lives. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[@bw5277]

Also, most of the population appeared fit and trim but I have heard many adults drink and smoke a lot. I plan to go next year again, but maybe only to Osaka, Nara, Wakayama, and Okinawa.

[@askjapan9669]

True

[@bw5277]

Why is yen so weak against the dollar? Also, seems like Japan losing tons of revenue because tipping is not part of culture.

[@joesephjoestar4449]

@@bw5277 tipping is not the reason they are losing revenue

[@greatwhiteflash1645]

Also, my thinking changed dramatically when I turned 50. Suddenly I could not stop thinking about how little time was left. And that I needed to try to make that time of some worth. At least you do have children. For some people passing your experiences in to children can give meaning to life. But everyone is different and one cannot make generalisations about such things.

[@orangewarm1]

'boring' is actually a luxury. there are men fighting in wars, men starving, men homeless, men jobless, disabled men. 'boring' means you have free time -- to do anything you want. All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.” - Pascal

[@PresSees]

Most men. Want something going on, even If it's a war. Or something that's why we want war movies and enjoy them.That's extreme purpose

[@LovelyDay11]

The problem is a lack of purpose. And that happens in an overly materialist, atheist world. When you don't know who you are, why you're here, how you function and how the world functions, where you're going (information deliberately withheld from us), when you're told you're an accident so have a drink or eat a burger, well then you have no meaning in life. And once you're properly brainwashed "they" step in and find a war for you so you can have some purpose, serving the empty and dead inside elite who feast on your energy, spiritually and, in case of war, physically as well.

[@shaheedharun445]

@@PresSees Agree most want action or something going on

[@jeffreywang8575]

Thanks for being open and brave in sharing your inner feelings. I'm also in my fifties. I visited Japan as a tourist earlier this year. While riding a train from Osaka to Kobe and looking at the scenery outside the window, I thought to myself that, although Japan is a very safe and prosperous country, life here seems overly orderly, almost to the point of being suffocating. I would find it quite depressing to live here. I didn't mean to speak poorly of your country. I really loved it as a tourist, but I just thought the people there could use more excitement.

[@NexLevelQuest]

Thanks for sharing. Social media and news made life exponentially miserable. It’s inevitable I guess.

[@dominicturner77]

This sounds like normal parenthood. Apparently you get happier again once your kids grow up.

[@loganl5408]

Not having kids is great too

[@BlessmanMedia]

@@loganl5408 until you're old enough to need help

[@SHAOLINCOWBOY-ip9hw]

it is a bit of a relief when your kids get out on their own. you still have to worry about them though because there is still so much for them to learn and figure out when they get out into the real world.

[@rotweilerscholar1181]

@@loganl5408 It works for selfish people. That's for sure. A world that revolves around me all the time would have me selfish as ever. Kids keep you grounded and you remind you life is bigger than your perspective.

[@plucafo]

@@rotweilerscholar1181 I've always seen having kids as being more selfish considering world population has exploded in the last 100 years. Plus you have kids for yourself, no? Because you want kids?

[@Jomumpty]

Im only 22 so ive got a lot ahead of me, but i think i still relate to this feeling. After university i went straight into working, and now after a year i feel very lost and without purpose. Its comforting though to see how these feelings of boredom and being lost are universal, no matter the age or country. Respect to you for putting yourself out there and speaking about how you feel, i wish you and anyone else feeling this way all the best

[@shirkhan3818]

Some regards: develop a passion for something outside your job, for yourself. It can be writing, videomaking, photography, sketching, whatever. This sounds profane but has so many benefits. You broad your view on the things, but also your capabilities. And over a while you can combine the capabilities of your job and your other passion and find new ways. This also will help you when you stop working at some day. So many will get a depression because they have no „task“. Secondly - understand how your human mind works. To me (as a European) Buddhist philosophy has the strongest works. Much more wholistic then the recent psychology of the last 100 years, although Freud, C.G.Jung and Erikson have very great works adding to this. The concept of Bardo is of such greatness, to reflect and understand your phases in allday life. Also Tibetan philosophy of Tilopa. Do not misunderstand. Those concepts are not about Karma, rebirth and praying to Buddha statues. It has absolutely nothing to do with that. But I guess in Japan it’s hard to find the tree in the forest on this particular field.

[@redhoodm2227]

you might have no idea how helpful this video is for people like me trying to understand more about my father and his behavior

[@DiamondShocked]

I visited tokyo recently and fully felt the suffocation. We have it too in Silicon Valley CA USA. It's the work work work then sleep daily routine that makes everybody miserable. And you end up having no time or energy to pursue the type of life you would truly like to live. On top of this, Japan has such strong societal expectations that it is extremely difficult to break the norm and build your own identity. I would never trade freedom for safety.

[@bryanwoodward1822]

First I want to say your English is very good. Having lived in Japan, Hokkaido, Kanto, Kansai, for over 30 years I have found some things frustrating and annoying. But I now appreciate that Japan is safer with lower crime compared to my birthplace NZ. Feeling safe to walk anywhere is something to really appreciate. Both NZ and Australia have very high living costs, owning a house is out of reach for most people now, over 1 million dollars. Rents are crazy high. I wonder if you have traveled overseas ? I guess maybe as you speak English well. Travel overseas allows you a different perspective on life, and is exciting. I understand about Japanese voting etc. but that's something that probably won't change soon ... don't worry about things you can't change. You can make changes for yourself though, if you find life boring it's your own responsibility to do something about it. I moved to Osaka 2 years ago and had no friends here. Although I can speak Japanese well I joined the local city free Japanese conversation lessons to make new friends. I now have a good friend from Italy and we hang out together. Of course you need to care for your family, but care of yourself is important too. If you can't enjoy life yourself then you can't care well for your family. In my 50's I bought a motorbike and enjoyed touring with new friends. Remember Nike.... Just Do it !!😉

[@tosenstardom2316]

You're a very skilled speaker and I guess you are only going through the natural reaction of the life cycle. Good luck.

[@HacksignKT]

I legit thought you were late 30s or early 40s, not 50. Keep it up, dude.

[@Sh0n0]

I thought he was 12 🤯

[@Pladderkasse]

Don't give up man. You have passions and interests that will make you happy. One day you might find the time and will to pursue them. Mine is music. I'm 53 and when I'm not at work, I'm a bass payer in a band. It makes me happy. I realize that you Japanese work many hours and your society is so socially tight, that it may be difficult to step outside of what people expect of you. At least, that is my theory about Japan. Maybe, it's time for a change. And I believe, that where there is a will, there is a way. One day, your kids will leave the nest and you will have time to explore what makes you happy.

[@DonYang73]

Dude, grass is always greener on the other side. I am 51 and i just bought a Harley 😂. As a Japanese who can speak good English, i believe you can do a lot whether for fun or professionally. Good luck to both of us.

[@ashutoshthakur6768]

I bet it'll go viral.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks

[@dethswurl117]

I think so too, great video

[@bato-tsyrenbatuev2706]

youtube algorhythms blessed this guy

[@despicableone4495]

U were right

[@user-hb2eq1sk7n]

why

[@AlphaMaleMy]

I am 49, divorsed, no kids. and I am the same but making plans to cherish my life, cheer up mate!

[@Archie-23]

I went through a time of sensing an emptiness in my life. My life was good, no dramas but just a sense of emptiness. I remember being at a dance at high school and looking around and getting a sense of the emptiness of it all and I think it began there. To cut a long story short when I became a Christian and accepted Jesus into my life and repented and asked for forgiveness I can honestly say that emptiness left and has never returned. Life has had its ups and downs and challenges but that empty feeling has never returned. 🙏

[@MusiicRoolz]

that's purpose 😌 not everyone wants to or can get it through religion though

[@Archie-23]

@@MusiicRoolz Yes for sure there will be those who want nothing to do with religion and I accept that. I only shared how that sense of emptiness was filled in my life. At the time I had purpose in my life but it did not fill that emptiness. People come to know the Lord in so many ways. We all have our own paths. Seek Him and you will find Him. God bless

[@silver_surfer88]

41now, I bought a motorcycle (5speed 125cc) last year to go to work and interestingly that made me feel alive inside again, (now soon going for a CB650r) trying reconnect a bit with my past, remembering the times me and my father rode to the beach and just everywhere when i was a kid. We need to have something to do even if its small, it is what that keep us going.

[@Sound_of_a_Raven]

I'm 57 and I understand. Most people get this way. They call it mid-life crisis but it's actually, you're at the age where you are settled, Your entire life has been spent looking forward. Now you have an extensive amount of time behind you and you've never been prepared for that. You start wondering what you could have done or should have done in the past. I'll tell you. I'm a Christian. I read my Bible and it helps me through every day. That's what it's supposed to do. Everybody goes through so many things together. We are all the same. The word of God carries me through every day. There are hard days and easy days for me too. There's a place for comfort in the midst of loneliness, turmoil, chaos, depression, anything and everything. Jesus is the calm in the storm and the hope in the darkness. I pray for you. God bless.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. I will do my best

[@michaelperez5548]

Hi. A mid life crisis is a very well known phenomenon in America, so much so that it is a pretty common reference in t.v. shows and movies. In a way I think you are doing better than most who feel a little empty in life because you keep up with your youtube channel daily in a healthy way. It is used kind of as a vlog with is really just a journal of sorts. You are able to voice your interests and concerns to people around the world. I have heard often from people older than me that apathy is probably our biggest enemy, and apathy develops slowly over time as you build a routine in life that you perform that no longer has anything new to show you. So boredom will follow. Maybe think about things that have intrigued you recently and consider if you can maybe learn and maybe even participate in that thing. Have a good day. I enjoy your videos.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment. May be in Japan, everything is so peaceful and slow, which are good things but sometimes make us feel emptiness. I should go abraod.

[@pattif192]

I feel the same - I am in Florida. I am 55 yrs old. I take care of my 92 year old mother, so don't do much else. I feel empty also. I am trying to do things to control the feeling - making gratitude list especially. I just ordered some brushes and ink / rice paper. I am going to learn calligraphy. Try to keep my mind occupied. Sending love to everyone who feels alone ❤

[@Annie-ex3ge]

I think writing a diary about your thoughts and funny / annoying / everyday things that happen might be a good start. Writing helps me sort my thoughts and it helps me to look with humour at annoying situations. Maybe it will help you find out what you like to do as in volunteering or a hobby or a new different job, something that allows you to make friends.

[@askjapan9669]

Good idea, I will find a way to keep diary

[@d00mch1ld]

Japan is a beautiful country. But I will see myself falling into depression if I end up living there.

[@birit911]

Not if you live near Kabukicho 😊

[@tomh2425]

why you think so?

[@hackptui]

I'm American, turning 55 this week. I've felt this way for a while now, and I think it's mainly due to the fact that we're transitioning to a new phase of our lives. You realize your healthiest years are behind you, and you're pretty much done raising kids, but you've still got a bunch of time before retirement. You need to find a new purpose for your life, but you don't quite know what it is. It's been rough, but I think I'm finally starting to come out of it.

[@sladjanivkovic2]

Maybe travel, that is what I will do more when I have free time. Now I travel every 3 months or so.

[@sumofat4994]

retirement lol for many there is no such thing.

[@lapinsubmarine]

Since I couldn't afford a Porsche, I bought a surf skateboard at 53. I'm currently learning to skate... or kill myself on the board :) - but... somehow it's invigorating. Maybe it's the small steps... but I can totally empathize with you. I hope for you and everyone in this situation that you get out of it! For myself too :)

[@user-mj9lq9vp3w]

I'm 19. I'm an American. I constantly ask myself what's the point. I can work 16 hrs a day and would still barely be able to afford my own home. If it wasn't for my father letting me stay at his place for a bit to gather my resources, I'd be living in a car or tent, even though I work full time. Not only that, but family structure is crumbling nationally, so the idea of having one is very risky because the kids most likely won't have both parents stick together which is insanely damaging to them and hence to society. This nation has become a nightmare, some brave new world, ferenhiet, 1984 mix of horse 💩. There's cameras on every stop light. You're constantly being surveilled. Man, the list just doesn't end.

[@pieter9058]

​@@user-mj9lq9vp3wstill better than China. I'm sorry for you. Maybe do something out of the ordinary. Church, military, whatever. I have everything you might want (I'm twice as old, European) but my health is not that great. Choose an employer who pays for some excitement and purpose in your life.

[@davideller4022]

Thank you for sharing, I feel the same at the age of 38. I have no kids, but I also feel somewhat lost. I am just saving money and trying to relax, to have peacefulness in life.

[@Ash-vf2gd]

I'm in my 30s in the US but I've seen so much about your midlife crisis, and have also learned many good things. Stay strong bro!

[@theodorseiz9727]

3 Step Solution: 1. Buy a roadbike 2. Ride it every day 3. Smile again Works every time, 100%.

[@askjapan9669]

Thanks for your comment.

[@beesyd1011]

Hahaha I did this exact same thing in 2020. Feel great. Look great. Life is good. 42yo.

[@pamparam3495]

I bought my first motorcycle at 33

[@scott3683]

Better idea along same line -- BUY A MOUNTAIN BIKE!

[@KaireMl]

well my life is just as he described. I commute by bike and sometimes while I am riding I think to myself. "It is a beautiful day, I am healthy and life is good."