My Wife HIJACKED My VACATION! |

[@leah3801]

For the birth story, to make it worse, OP said in an edit that her mother died in child birth. So it's EVEN MORE reasonable that OP has a fear of child birth

[@beepboop8374]

And it’s reasonable to be scared to begin with but wow

[@pearlycomplaints]

Yeah her mom died in childbirth while, giving birth to OP’s brother when OP was 7. And the husband knows this. I’m glad she’s on her way to leaving this guy. And I’m glad she has her friend’s support

[@beepboop8374]

@@pearlycomplaints omg that’s so heartbreaking for OP.

[@CerealSalad]

as a bisexual wife, I’d be so weirded out if my husband announced to his coworkers I was bi. I’d think he had some kind of fetish… and part of my husband’s job is throwing Pride events throughout the year…

[@animepix12]

Florida story made my blood boil. I cannot stand manipulation like that. I was on the wifes side until she told the daughter. That was 1000% a manipulation tactic. "Well now we have to do what i want instead of what you want. My child is so excited you're not gonna take this from them are you 🥺". Ugh, that shit disgusts me. The husband was trying to be reasonable and try to talk it out. She absolutely told her daughter on purpose to get her way. Idk why but specifically when people get kids involved to manipulate people it really irks me.

[@vladimirulvrish]

The fake birth story, he works 10 MINUTES away from their house. He could have easily picked her up, got his mom ans taken them both to the hospital if he actually cared about his wife. Also in an update she mentioned he knows shes terrified of birth because her mom died giving birth to her younger brother. She also said her friend will be with her and got extra days off so she can be with her

[@paylove5173]

For the birth story, the husband didn’t even call the wife. Tell him that he could pick her up anymore until an hour later if she was really in labor, she would’ve been alone for an hour during one of the most dangerous times in a woman’s life

[@dissipatedcloud]

Absolutely insane.

[@hayleysackos9758]

So.....he was on his way to his wife and turned around to pick his mom up?.... Becauuuuuuuse he'd get there faster than an ambulance?

[@beepboop8374]

This. If you think someone’s having a heart attack you send an ambulance.

[@xDarkTrinityx]

I'm sorry... if you're having a heart attack, take an ambulance... what's even more effed is they could've told the friend they'd have them in their back pocket as a back up plan but HE INSISTED he'd be there for his wife and INSISTED she wouldn't need anyone else.

[@dissipatedcloud]

Yeah, hello, you're going to casually drive a heart attack victim to the hospital instead of getting first responders to her asap??

[@maidden]

Not many people are aware of Post-Partum Psychosis, so don't feel too bad about that. Anyone who has heard of it would probably jump to that same conclusion that I did and the commenter also did, that it sounds very much like OP's wife is going through that. It's not so much that he should "endure" it, but just look at it like what if your partner got a brain injury and it radically changed their behavior overnight? Because that's pretty much what happened. OP should absolutely keep himself and their baby safe (wife will probably be extremely grateful for that if/when she recovers), but also understand that his wife isn't herself, she is ill and needs medical help. This isn't a normal abusive relationship, if there is such a thing.

[@beepboop8374]

This. She needs help. Postpartum depression and anxiety are wild enough, but postpartum psychosis is a whole different thing.. and all of these things are very real medical conditions that require professional help. Probably before he started taking the extra steps to send photos etc but I understand why he tried that. She likely was already going through it when that happened.

[@pearlycomplaints]

Yeah she is behaving abusively toward him. Constantly harassing him about his whereabouts forcing him to justify his time this intensely then it turning physical is not ok. I don’t think he should leave her unless she refuses to get help for her condition. I think he should give her the chance to seek help for this very serious post partum condition. Ultimately though, if her hitting him was a dealbreaker for him I can’t tell him he’s wrong to leave. I think physical violence in a relationship is a slippery slope especially if she refuses to seek medical attention. Regardless of if he stays with her or not he needs to sit her down and convey the seriousness of the condition and insist she get medical attention since she could be a danger to their child.

[@tubblebub]

I can't even explain how pissed off that birth story made me.

[@CircusoftheMoon]

I’m a lesbian and I don’t tell my coworkers I’m a lesbian. A handful know because they’re close enough to me that they’ve heard me discuss my life outside of work, but I’m not making a PSA to every colleague that I’m a lesbian. I’m here for a paycheck not validation.

[@pearlycomplaints]

For the comic writer story I think that the situation is minimal but it was escalated because the “I put a roof over your head” phrase carries a negative charge. I don’t really like when people say that to children because a child doesn’t owe a parent anything for providing them with basic human needs. And I REALLY don’t like this phrase being used with your spouse. It seems disrespectful and like a petty slight.

[@LexieHillperforming]

Me searching the comments for someone saying this 😅 To me the joke stopped once he said the roof comment. He's basically saying that he's keeping score of who does more & he comes out on top. Never mind that on top of her writing career AND school, she also does the housework AND childcare!!!

[@srawhoiam]

Birth story- why the hell the guy call his mother before running for the wife to take her to the hospital and also leave her waiting for an hour before letting her know that he's not coming! What an a"hole

[@anikaperera]

kinda crazy he called his mom before going to get his wife and then couldn’t call the wife to inform her of what was happening

[@ashl2115]

Story 3 - Look, I generally disagree with relationship test type things. But fair play to the OP. Pregnancy and birth are risky, she needed to know what would happen to protect herself and the baby. The point was proved, the husband will never change. I hope OP makes her choices accordingly.

[@DesAnanieva]

Story 1: In my country we have a saying "look for a calf under the ox" it's idiom but very fitting. It means that op's wife is searching a reason to fight or something that is not there and never will be. Also I love the longer hair on Josh❤

[@animepix12]

Most (but not all) new mothers will experience the "baby blues" which is a small amount of sadness or depression after their baby is born. Some will get post-partum depression which is more serious than baby blues. Post-partum psychosis is rare, but as the reddit commenter said, it can be very dangerous. The mom is literally not in her right mind, and many women with it have killed their babies. It's absolutely tragic. I hope that mom gets help.

[@nualavi7688]

I hope so too ❤

[@FeloniousAngel]

I wrote a paper about post partum psychosis in one of my university classes. That is a DARK rabbit hole.

[@beepboop8374]

Oh absolutely. Especially when combined with the dad working late and being gone all day…. My mind goes to a handful of the worst possible outcomes… usually exacerbated by being home alone with a newborn baby with a mental illness and not a single person getting the mom the help she desperately needed prior to something terrible happening despite there being signs.

[@nualavi7688]

​@@beepboop8374 I thought about this too. So scary. I went through postpartum anxiety and that was hard enough, even when I had support. I cannot fathom being alone all day while feeling all that.

[@beepboop8374]

@@nualavi7688 I had ppa and ppd coupled with pp pre-eclampsia (I dare anyone to not feel anxious with a bp of 220/120 though) and same. I had support for the first two weeks with my partner home and even after he went back to work he came home early every day. I cannot imagine being alone, all day, every day, with a mental illness and pp psychosis. Literally having your mind working against you 24/7 and no one helping. It’s like a horror movie.

[@nualavi7688]

@@beepboop8374 It is. I am so glad you made it through 🙏💜✨

[@beepboop8374]

On the birth story as a healthcare professional and someone who’s given birth several times, that husband is the AH. Even if the mom’s heart attack was real, you call 911 immediately and put her in an ambulance. You also know your wife is waiting specifically for YOU to take her to the hospital because YOU insisted you should be the one to take her, not the best friend. It’s not like a phone call was made immediately to the wife to say “this is what’s happening, please get your friend to take you to the hospital right away,” or he arranged another ride to her himself. Also, birth CAN BE AN EMERGENCY. Especially first births. I had emergencies with my first two and was lucky to have made it. With my second, my newborn had an emergency after birth. Aside from all that, seeing his child for the first time should be a top priority as well. That moment only happens once, and emergencies can unfortunately happen with newborns as well. He got offended his wife didn’t trust him and then showed the very reason why she shouldn’t, and when she explained herself he doubled down. What a jerk. He’s not gonna have any more kids with her probably. As far as the graphic novelist… I’m gonna disagree. I think the “I put a roof over your head” thing is very misogynistic. He would be paying for childcare, cleaning and probably several other things if not for her and she’s doing all of that on top of going to school, WORKING, and finishing a graphic novel. She’s a single mom who happens to be married and he’s trying to make her feel like she owes him for the house they live in together when in reality she helps with that household more than he does it sounds like. He works. That’s it. She works, does the childcare, does the housework, goes to school, and is about to publish a graphic novel that may end up providing more for the household. His success didn’t happen in a vacuum either, I’m sure she was a silent partner 😂

[@LiteraryChic]

Just to add, I recently had my fourth and had complications. If I wouldn’t have been in the hospital, my child would have died. I was literally pushing him out when his heart stopped. I was rushed in under 2 minutes to the o.r. and was out under and had a c section without even knowing what was really happening. I was pushing one minute and then the doctor was like, we’re moving you stop pushing count back from 10. I woke up three hours later and was told the cord was around his neck and he had to be revived, but he was ok then. And that was MY FOURTH. my first three were mostly uneventful (natural births, very painful, but normal). It blows my mind he would leave her, FOR AN HOUR, while she’s in labor. She could have bled to death, the baby could have died, it’s so insane to me. I mean, he could have called, he could have even texted!! Just, throw out the whole man.

[@beepboop8374]

@@LiteraryChic oh my gosh that’s so scary I’m so sorry you went through that but I’m glad you’re both ok! I can’t believe it either, especially since with her first she likely may not know if something bad is happening, she would be sitting there waiting for him with an emergency unfolding, all while in pain mind you… because his ego took a hit when she said she couldn’t trust him. Even with my knowledge in the medical field and being my second kid I still almost didn’t go in to the er on time after my second birth when I had a postpartum hemorrhage. I barely lived.

[@AlluringUndead]

You guys should do "Hard Mode" where you guess AH or NTA then stick with it and defend yourself. It's usually hilarious.

[@karac9139]

The sticker that says "Bi Wife energy" boom problem solved

[@peanut_toast999]

Vacation story: im on OP side. He wanted an adult vacation not centered around kids. I can understand that. Sometimes you need a break. It would be good for them as a couple as well. Every day life is centered around the kids anyway.

[@EdibleStars369]

The first story sounds like shes fixated on him validating her sexuality with his work colleagues, but its not actually about his work colleagues if that makes sense. I think shes feeling unsure about his acceptance and support in this new part of herself that she has discovered and is looking for him to show in actions his understanding of this and acceptance of her with pride in her journey. Coming out as Bi when in a straight passing marriage, she may be experiencing the common feeling that many Bi people have that people invalidate our sexuality when in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex, like that then must mean you're not actually Bi somehow

[@kianaolive]

I got the same vibe too. I definitely think he’s valid in saying that it’s none of his coworkers business but he could do a little more than just wear a pin for a month in order to show more support. It’s clearly deeper than that for her and that’s completely understandable.

[@joeelliott2151]

Very well said!

[@helslastangel]

She could chill out a bit though, because work colleagues don't need to know everything, especially at a new job when you're still on probation. I'm bisexual and understand the invalidating statements that come with dating someone of the opposite sex, but idk. She seems childish about needing her husband to tell everyone

[@EdibleStars369]

​@@helslastangelIt's not really about the work colleagues knowing, it's just that she's gotten fixated on this being the way he shows he's support and validation of this part of her. She needs to work on that, both in individual and couples therapy to get to actually feeling secure in him accepting her and realise that it's not about him telling people at work really

[@helslastangel]

@@EdibleStars369 I already understood that

[@pearlycomplaints]

For the vacation story I don’t think he’s the asshole. He won the trip and I don’t think it’s wrong of him to want an all adult vacation. Taking care of a child is a lot of work and on vacations you’ll have to do a lot of child centric activities. I can imagine this not being relaxing at all. I don’t think that parents are selfish to want to do trips without kids. Couples need to have time to themselves as well. With my anxiety I certainly couldn’t handle going to all these family vacation tourist traps that OP mentioned and I would rather stay home as well then have a panic attack at Disney World

[@Krys89]

Story 1 is weird def NTA wife sound like she got something she need to work on within herself, there's literally no reason to announce your s/o sexuality at your new job 🤦 and yes at will companies you have to be careful especially when you're new

[@Shiftycheesecake]

Happy birthday Josh!! But for the last story, as someone who has had post partum, that shit is wild on your emotions. I was pissed all the time and I didn't know why. I've also been around people who have had psychotic breaks. I myself haven't had one but as someone who's seen it, it's crazy scary to be apart of. Because no matter what you do, nothing will ever convince them or be good enough. It can be very dangerous. If you need to, call 911 and a professional will come and handle it, if they won't go. That's what I had to do.

[@indigocrayon520]

The Florida story has a key detail you guys ignored, it isn't close to Disney it's in an area where couples will have fun. My parents and grandparents made sure to take couples trips without children and I firmly believe parents need vacations away from their kids. I feel that's probably why my parents and grandparents are still married, they put their partners first not the kids.

[@timburtonluver28]

I’m iffy on the “put your partners first” thing when it comes to trips because it has a limit - but I absolutely agree that if you are making plans that go way the hell out of the way of the actual location and amenities you will have access to, it doesn’t make sense. They have a free trip to, like you said, a more adult oriented area of Florida - not to Disney, which requires them to jump through massive hoops to make it happen. It’s really inconsiderate to make that much extra work for a trip you aren’t paying for and/or that is mainly for/being taken on behalf of someone else.

[@indigocrayon520]

@@timburtonluver28 Yes, if my father or grandfathers were abusive they would have left to protect us kids

[@timburtonluver28]

@@indigocrayon520Oh, I don’t doubt it! I was more talking about trips specifically, and about instances where parents literally sometimes make a point to let the kids know trips aren’t for them, or they leave kids home every chance they get - even sometimes when they’re going somewhere important to those kids, just because they want to let them know their kids have to depend on their benevolence and mercy… if that makes sense? I have firsthand experience with that, because my mom is very weird and shows narcissistic tendencies, but I have had to determine for myself sometimes whether or not my brother and I were essentially getting our noses rubbed in things for no reason other than for our mom to show she had control and she “deserved” to splurge on herself until we “couldn’t afford” to do the things we felt were important to us. I also have unfortunately had friends who would get left for months at home alone while their parents go on extended vacations. As in they literally would be left to fend for themselves. So, for me, I can see the extremes when it comes to providing experiences for you and your partner vs your kids - and I definitely don’t think OP was being selfish for not being willing to take THAT trip to get the kid involved and add a bunch of work, when it would make more sense for them to plan for a specific trip later instead.

[@s.enpapi]

I thought they mentioned it? they read a comment saying it would be a 4 hour drive from the Vaca spot to Disney?

[@indigocrayon520]

@@s.enpapi The boys are acting like they are vacationing in a family area when they aren't. 4hrs means 8hrs of driving in one day that doesn't seem feasible

[@candaceseymour7171]

lol the final cut, kitty appears staring directly into my soul❤

[@paylove5173]

The vacation story, I think it depends on the relationship between the stepfather and stepdaughter. What were the boundaries of their relationship that they set up when they got married? Was he going to be a father figure and responsible for the daughter financially? he’s just the stepfather that gets no stay in the rest of the family then he should be able to keep his winning

[@madisonmathis9422]

My husband's grandma had literal real heart palpations and chest pain when I was giving birth from anxiety and excitement AND DIDNT TELL ANYONE UNTIL SHE GOT HOME AFTER I HAD MY SON💀 the reason verbatim "she didn't want to be a bother the baby needed the attention and Madison just gave birth" she is fine thankfully but like I can't even imagine that poor womans situation because my inlaws will literally risk death to not cause a fuss🥴 she was forced to have her BP checked every visit with the baby for the next month because she scared the HELL out of us

[@ToxiqueTrone]

HAPPY BDAY LEAFFY JOSH.

[@ViktorErikFade]

27:48 WOW Okay that dude is a total ass wipe Yeah id kick him out that DAY Tbh her feeling to test him was good because if that happened when she was ACTUALLY giving birth that would have caused complications and she could have had to call a cab or ambulence which takes ANOTHER half hour to get there..... ..... Yeah, that dude is to much of a mommas boy, how dare he not communicate with his wife about to have his kid . given her circumstance and how the mom is no she isnt the asshole

[@aislingvee8769]

Also the comment from the husband or his mother about how marriage needs trust and why doesn't OP trust husband.... Right after the husband proved that any trust would've been misplaced. "how can you not trust your husband?" how could OP?

[@ViktorErikFade]

@@aislingvee8769 THAT and the friend low-key pushing off responsibility rather than going "oh your trusting asking me ? Yes of course" It's a bit off to me the friend was also kind of an asshole. My mother had an abusive husband situation and had to get someone else to drive her to the hospital before, they took the job willingly and assumed if she asked she must need help not casually deny her

[@QueenOfTheZombieApocalypse]

Last story: I don’t think it’s telling OP to endure so much as telling him that he needs to take serious action immediately. The newborn baby’s safety *has* to be the number 1 priority because they can do nothing to protect themself. That comment was right and if this is PP Psychosis, it is escalating to violence and that could easily turn to harming the baby and/or herself. There was a similar story on Reddit awhile back, where in addition to post partum the wife’s ‘friend’ was feeding her paranoia. The wife ended herself and had likely planned to end their baby with her. Thankfully OP had taken the baby out of the home and refused to give him to her - but it was just such an awful awful situation. I hope he takes the advice from that comment to heart and gets her help immediately and gets their baby somewhere safe.

[@sarahpooler2330]

For the postpartum psychosis story, step one is probably the husband going elsewhere for the moment. Until he can get her help. Hopefully he can take the baby with him. This stuff is terrifying, especially to the person it's affecting. We, as mothers, need the people around us to help recognise the signs and get us help. No one should have to worry about hurting their own baby on purpose. (Unfortunately we all accidentally bump the little ones sometimes.😬)

[@SheSheBoom21]

33:01 What are you going to do for the mom having a heart attack but get her to the hospital. The wife needs his ongoing support thru the whole event.

[@kimwa0]

idk i call BS on the silent investor comment because he followed up with "i put a roof over your head"... to me that IS doubling down in a way. i think a lot of people gloss over that point because im pretty sure that's part of why she feels belittled.

[@sillymanmcgee]

yess he really was doubling down (and in a way that, had he been her parent rather than spouse, we’d all be condemning) it also just makes me sad that she had commented that “lots of people in her life have said that she’s too sensitive and should learn how to take a joke,” because thats a classic bullying tactic. i’ve never ever been told that by someone well-meaning, its always someone who wants to put you down after they just put you down.

[@MisforMakeup]

I had to pause the video and look up how many subscribers you have on the tictac and it’s almost 1,000,000😮 the audacity to not pay you guys

[@getcreative4434]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOSH!!!!!!

[@JenniferLeeTacy]

"Hi my name is Bill and my wife is bisexual. Here is the TPS report you asked for."

[@J3nJ3nl0llip0p]

29:15 this guy shouldn't have gotten married

[@TheButterfly01010]

My brother won a $10,000 vacation of his choice from a fireworks festival. He took his wife and their baby to France, and left his two teenagers at home.

[@MercedesLefrancois]

I really hate the vacation guy, don't marry people with kids if you don't want kids, easy peasy

[@KatChartreux]

Happy Birthday 🥳

[@pubshine]

Happy birthday!!!!!🎂

[@AlluringUndead]

Happy birthday Josh 🎉

[@cynicalvixen9290]

Post partum psychosis can be very serious and so can just sleep deprivation with a newborn...I don't think Dad's always see it because they sleep when they can... Mom's will often stay awake even when the baby is sleeping listening for changes in sounds of breathing, constantly getting up checking to make sure they are okay and even trying to just do chores while you have a moment without a crying baby to attend to... All of these already valid concerns are amplified by hormonal changes and the pressure to be an expert mom from the moment of birth...

[@raquelgarza8241]

happy birthday Josh and go leafs!

[@HonorWillow]

Husband thinks funding: I mean the way he said it does sound like he devalues her work as unfortunately a lot of cis men who have partners who either are or they consider to be housewives do say things like that as a "joke" but it's not. It sounded different to the way you all took it

[@ExMbegins]

Happy birthday 🎂 lol

[@Mazikeen46]

As a mom I would have told my kid to go be with there partner I would have even stooped to begging them telling them to leave me be with your partner

[@rinowichan]

naaaaahhh mates, the vacation trip I am 100% on OP side, he won, he just wanted to have a couple vacation and is okay to want to have time for you without the kid, you can go with the kid for another time idk maybe is because I jsut like to see my parents happy I would not be angry of them wanting to have they time

[@stepha_F]

42:44 Never thought I’d side with Shawn over John lol

[@Coco21212]

Story 4: Everyone sucks here. But the husband more so IF their financial situation makes it so that it's their only chance to go to an out of state vacation and for the daughter to have that experience. He can have his kid free vacation a different week (spend it in one of his friends' home for example or anywhere not super expensive). He's really REALLY selfish. I think he's lucky to have a wife who manipulates him into being a decent person because if I was her, I wouldn't have "let it slip" to the kid but I also would have dumped his a** so fast...

[@carolhowker7069]

Story 1 is fucking weird!

[@witch1154]

The first story is really funny to me since I work at a store that's very like out and loud about sexuality, gender, poly, etc. I 100% know that isn't what most places are like but my last 2 jobs were both like this. There's constantly places to drop that info about ur wife in a daily convo organically.

[@Taewills]

There are plenty of workplaces that don’t venture anywhere near those topics. Especially in office spaces like Sean/Jon are used to. The only time might be during pride month if the corporation has a supportive vibe. It seems like a completely irrelevant piece of info lol I’m bi & out - never have I mentioned this at work

[@indigocrayon520]

Yes I have worked in female dominated fields, I knew EVERYONE'S sex life, us younger single folks couldn't get away from it 😭 we would be eating lunch and the boomers would visiting at the table talking about wild sex stories, big difference from my office job later in life 😅

[@DingoTheDemon]

I'm in a WFH team and three of us are transgender but we basically never talk about that except when one of us came out

[@Crochet_by_mic]

Cum laude means you have at least an 80% on all your courses

[@ApinaKapina1]

The way the wife is about the bi thing makes me think she decided to be bi, to be somehow relevant.. The postpartum one.. why would you go straight to a divorce and not get help? Obviously the mother is suffering and reacted, which isn't weird at all. She has a newborn, hormones, depression..

[@Giveuponyourdreamsanddie2]

1st story my mind immediately went to the possibility that the wife has recently realised she was Bi and wants to explore that but can't because she's married so she's trying to push this narrative that he isn't supportive of her so that she could get out of the relationship

[@riahw3750]

I thoughts exactly. Or shes going to tell him he has to let her sleep with other people to prove he's supportive

[@coolcatcilla]

I suffered deep sleep deprivation and post partum after both my kids. I never once thought to strike my partner. Was I not myself? Absolutely. But the thought of harming anyone never crossed my deranged (at the time) mind. Post partum is not an excuse to be an asshole

[@nualavi7688]

Postpartum is just a state. It means after birth and surely is hard on everyone. Now, Postpartum Depression, Postpartum anxiety and Postpartum psychosis are illnesses which can have the most awful results, for mom, baby and family. I am really glad that all of that is foreign to your experience. I wish no one that burden. I hope he helps her and takes her to a specialist. He can divorce her if he wishes too, but treating her is VERY necessary.

[@musadifuoco5487]

While I don’t think the bi wife is in the right for demanding her husband tells his coworkers (I’m bi myself)… guys, it’s not the same to announce that one is straight, because that’s the societal assumption. People just think that by default, especially when one is bi and married to the opposite gender. Look up “compulsory heteronormativity”. Often bi people tend to feel invisible in their queerness and I think OP’s wife is taking it to the extreme. I agree she shouldn’t ask her husband to “come out” for her with his new colleagues and it would be super weird, but the argument you are using is irking me quite a bit. You are wonderful people with a very open attitude towards diversity and I do admire you all for that, which is why I felt like pointing this out. Love you, your partners, your pets and the channel. Keep up the good work!

[@aislingvee8769]

Also, proclaiming that you're straight usually doesn't take away from your safety. The wife doesn't know those coworkers and neither does OP. Telling them about the wife's sexuality could put them in danger

[@musadifuoco5487]

@@aislingvee8769 true. She absolutely isn’t in the right… it’s just the argument provided in the video that doesn’t sit very well with me

[@Resabuka]

For story 1 , the wife is just weird for expecting him to come out to people he doesn't even know. She's either seeking validation for coming out( still weird af), or she's hoping this information will get her some ladies' attention.

[@fairyannak]

For the postpartum story. I don’t think he is the asshole but I think he needs to give her some more grace. I am someone who got very insecure during pregnancy and after birth. I have said my partner is cheating on me even tho I know in a million years he would never. Also as someone who sometimes wants to be hugged when upset and sometimes don’t I have accidentally hit my partner really hard when trying to get him off of me when I’m upset when he just wants to help. I apologized just like she did. I’m 4 months after my child and I am still going through so much. We went on a trip so he could propose and I was freaking out the whole time about my baby. Like I am obsessed about my kid. The good the bad the everything. I know it’s not healthy and I am trying to work on it. She needs help. But I don’t think he is the asshole either just needing more understanding of the situation

[@riahw3750]

Hitting your partner is NOT okay. She doesn't need grace she needs help and so do you, im glad to hear you are getting it

[@lollollolskeet]

For the bi story, the only time its relevant to mention is if it impacts your work. I am transgender and lesbian. I had to inform my school that i am trans so i could use the womens restroom comfortably and get the correct uniform, i didnt tell them i am lesbian because its irrelevant. The main reason I told them i am trans is so they could send the right uniform since i look like a cis woman but my documents said male (i changed them to say female since then) and the uniforms were mailed based on documentation. I wouodnt tell them that my sister, mother, father, partner etc is gay, bi or trans (or any other part of the LGBT+ community for my expanded peeps) because it is IRRELEVANT.

[@ViktorErikFade]

Free vacation story: The husband was not the asshole at the point of "She didnt even hear of the location of the said vacaton beforemaking plans" But, the husband is a asshole with... "I dont choose my family first" He won a "vacation" not a romantic getaway So , lile marriage , this is the fault of both parents being assholes they should have cmpramized as he DID win it on his own, but he should choose his family . HOWEVER the wife is a total dick for not listening to him and not talking to him , she just took over his stuff 3/4th not asshole

[@XxBirdyKunxX]

I can lowkey see where story 1's wife is coming from. At lot of bi people (especially when is straight passing relationships) can feel very ostracized and disconnected from any community. Also she may want her husband to veiw their relationship through a maybe a more queer lense, or at least veiw her as queer, and be proud of her. And saying ill put a pin on is so low-key dismissive to me at least. And like ...idk it also sounds like hes covering it up. Not a single time in four weeks was there any chance of telling anyone, like, "Yeah its so exciting my wife came out this weekend" I highly doubt it. I know how small talk is. There is absolutely no chance that he wasn't at least in some small way asked how his day or weekend or anything like that was. How the wife is is a COMMON question. I dont think he's the asshole. But idk, i also dont think hes the good guy?? Ya know. I think he probably IS dismissive of her. Because he was dissmissive to her face. Id love to hear the other side of this story tbh. Edit: Or like, Why couldn't he put a pin on in general, even outside of pride, and when questioned say, like yeah my wife came out??? Then he wouldn't be just be bringing it up, and honestly mainly other allies or queer people would even notice. So unless hes in a highly homophobic job, he wouldn't be risking his job (and AGAIN you know almost instantly when your in an unsafe space for queer people.)

[@peanut_toast999]

How would they even respond to that though? Congratulations? Hes only known them for a month. Its an awkward thing for the work environment.

[@XxBirdyKunxX]

​@@peanut_toast999 Not really? I've been visibly queer my entire life without it being awkward, or ive talked about my partners being queer. Like it comes up because it's IMPORTANT. Even when I'm in straight passing relationships. It's only awkward if someone is ashamed or embarrassed about it.

[@joeelliott2151]

Story 1: Will he speak up if homophobic things are said or is he just benefiting from appearing to be in a heteronormative relationship. It’s not the same as announcing his partner is straight. Most people assume everyone is straight because the majority of humans identify as such. Straight and queer people have very different experiences and queer people could be fired for being queer in most of the US until very recently. Also, he’s using the same arguments homophonic parents do to get out of ever acknowledging their children are queer. “It’s no one’s business.” My assumption is this isn’t about work but about her feeling he does not validate her identity and is concerned she’s on this journey alone. From his perspective he’s in the clear but I feel we are missing more info.

[@carolhowker7069]

I work in an office and after 4 years nobody knows shit about my sex life. If someone says something I disagree with I say so. It has nowt to do with who I do or don't shag!

[@joeelliott2151]

@@carolhowker7069your comment implies acknowledging queer relationships is the same as talking about sex. Which is part of the problem with societies view of queer individuals. Same as wearing a pride flag = support for queer people, not a direct connection to who you shag.

[@indigocrayon520]

For me everyone is ace until they same something 😅 I am straight

[@kianaolive]

I think it’s a little disingenuous to conflate him saying his wife’s sexuality is none of his coworkers business to homophobic excuses. It really isn’t any of their business. It would be equally as odd of an ask if she was married to a woman and wanted her wife to tell her coworkers that she’s bisexual. It just doesn’t make any sense to want your partner to divulge that their partner isn’t straight to random coworkers. There might be additional information that would make her wanting him to tell people make sense but nothing in the original post is really making that curl all the way over for me but I also don’t talk to my coworkers at all lmao.

[@indigocrayon520]

​@@kianaolive this is well said, I agree.

[@DelaneyEgger]

Started listening last month, (from the beginning lol) I’m now all caught up and I’m going to stay up to date! Thanks for getting me through long miserable work days. hate to say it buuuttttt josh is my favorite 😁🩵

[@hcf4kd1992]

The vacation story-- blended families are such hard work. It sounds like she doesn't have step kids, so she might not quite get it... My husband and I are in a yours/mine/ours situation. If it weren't for the trips we took alone, our marriage would have long since ended. We also take the kids on trips altogether and in separate groupings-- little versus big, his vs mine, one on ones with both of us or just the one parent they want. My husband and I take at least 2 weekends a year if not a longer trip, just us. Believe it or not, Disney is not a childhood requirement. And as an adult, I would not like traveling with my own mother, though I love her very much. 🫠

[@pearlycomplaints]

I love this comment about people acting like Disneyland is a childhood requirement. I think there are more people who haven’t gone to Disney as a kid than not. If I had children I would not be taking them there on vacation when you could go on a much cooler vacation elsewhere. The mouse doesn’t need any more money.