Blessing in disguise. The good, the bad, all of these were simply a lesson, a teacher. Taught you the meaning of life & how to live with it. Some people can learn some can't. Luckily you're the one who can. If there's a idea I want to share with you, that is "執念(obsession)". In buddhism's perspective, 執念 only leave you nothing but pain. God bless you & your family.