Plants That Grow on Badlands & Petrified Forests of West Texas

Another beast of a video at 45 min long, but we got it all in this one - bivalve fossils, ammonite fossils, petrified wood, cryptic cacti , badlands, and federally listed endangered plants. Oreocarya (Cryptantha) crassipes is a wooly little member of the borage family that is somehow able to grow on the barren shake badlands of West Texas near the Mexican Border. #Baculites is a genus of ammonite that lived in the area back when it was underwater, 80 million years prior. Why are members of the Mustard Family, Buckwheat Family and Borage Family so successful in deserts? This question and many others get examined in this episode of Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't.
Your contributions support this content. It sounds clichéd, but it's true. Whether it's travel expenses, vehicle repair, or medical costs for urushiol poisoning (or rockfalls, beestings, hand slices, toxic sap, etc), your financial support allows this content to continue so the beauty of Earth's flora can be made accessible to the rest of us in the degenerate public. At a time when so much is disappearing beneath the human footprint, CPBBD is willing to do whatever it takes to document these plant species and the ecological communities they are a part of before they're gone for good.
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Thanks, GFY.

[@shaneflickinger]

I choked on my Cola when you called your dog a geriatric coyote! Thanks for trespassing and bringing us to these amazing locations.

[@davidhettesheimer3685]

Lol. So did I. Dam

[@kelpylee]

Limey is for British people in general I think, it's a reference to the use of limes to prevent scurvy during seafaring

[@gramursowanfaborden5820]

initially because the Spanish navy had a monopoly on the lemon trade so British seamen got their vitamin C from limes instead. as a British guy, it's hardly worth getting sour over, it's reciprocal to calling an American a Yank, i think.

[@jonstfrancis]

Although limes are pretty shit for Vit C, but better than nothing.

[@jonstfrancis]

@@pattheplanter They didn't know back then. But good to know now :)

[@whatabouttheearth]

They got alot of lime trees there

[@polsyg6581]

I thought it was for the limestone cliffs of dover, weird.

[@edisoncigany5080]

I really like the added Dora the explorer-esque clips of asking how many cacti we see in the frame on these couple most recent vids.

[@OneFlewOverThere]

I don’t wanna hear anything explained to me ever again unless it comes from your brain/mouth noises. This is how you impart knowledge. You don’t know the talent you truly have.

[@paulann5257]

Precisely this!

[@Terrakinetic]

You mean, "Implant knowledge."

[@polianarchy]

Right? Love to see someone using their performative primate prowess for educational purposes

[@Haerodiel]

@@Terrakinetic No, impart is correct. Google it. But also I share the sentiment; the way he talks - both in how he sounds and what he says - just really is an A+ listening experience!

[@Terrakinetic]

@@Haerodiel plaaaaannnnt

[@Montino4Ever]

You keep me sane and grounded when I feel the most unhinged. You'll probly never know how helpful your scientarcastic videos are to me, but when I wanna die it is nice to see plants, you've got a great point there, and it inspires me to do plants instead of dying until I die. I'm a horticulturist by trade so plants are life. People suck but plants only suck if they were evolved to use some sort of capillary action like that.

[@thedudegrowsfood284]

CPBBD has antihomicidal properties, but don't wipe yer whatnots with it.

[@dianacarpenter1285]

Don't want to die 😓

[@MorbidMonstera]

I keep showing people his channel. This guy gives me such joy.

[@judasgoatbarbecue4336]

Great video as always! When you said the part about trespassing I imagined the guy phoning the sheriff ,"Yeah, Sheriff, there's a guy on my land with two dogs talking about plants and rocks and singing Tina Turner songs......No, I'm serious....."

[@samuelbuckner1088]

"I'm gonna try to keep this one short" haha don't mind though, great video and beautiful scenery.

[@XaViEr3520]

He’s right it was short. Needed this to be Atleast 60 minutes long!!

[@Montino4Ever]

"I'm trespassing but he said its fine. Or he would say it fine, but he didnt yet..."

[@patrickblock2477]

"Fore skin on a golf ball !" Someone had their coffee today! Thanks for the miles of smiles!

[@Hayley-sl9lm]

Someone needs to pitch a Sesame Street segment where Tony Santoro teaches Elmo about Asteraceae

[@luvlylester25]

Wat the fuck Elmo ya prick

[@Hayley-sl9lm]

Seriously, we need to hook kids young on this shit. Elmo runs into Tony while waiting for the bus on Sesame Street and they talk about plants that can grow in the sidewalk cracks next to the garbage cans. Maybe we got some prickly lettuce, some sow thistle or what the shit. Elmo only knows dandelions of course because the seed puffs are fun to play with but he comes away with the appreciation of plants that can adapt to hostile urban conditions. We can save the suppositories for when he gets older.

[@luvlylester25]

@@Hayley-sl9lm your a wonderful woman

[@caroline_sunshine]

Elmo learns about Asteraceae and the importance of wipin' yer ass.

[@luvlylester25]

@@caroline_sunshine 'washing'

[@3eezie483]

that first chunk of petrified wood was gorgeous!

[@maryea9585]

out of all the things i learned from this video, its that there is a SECOND creation museum, not in my home state of KY, but in Texas. jesus h christ, what a country we live in

[@veteranscannabisadvocacygr5401]

🌀 The money shot is cactus 🌵 spines sticking out of a fool for Botany 😂

[@ChupiesWorld]

Last place I expected to find a guide for my paleontology research thesis in West Texas this summer

[@alpineflora586]

Going to the Bivalve dungeon? Haha

[@whatabouttheearth]

😄 😄 😄

[@Laserblade]

I don't recall how I stumbled onto your channel, but it has cultivated a deep interest in Botany. your style is honest and refreshing. Thank you! GFY.

[@Haerodiel]

Why did I initially think that meant "good for you"?

[@PyroPotPie]

What a banger of an episode. Your huge tangents had me dying from laughter. Keep up the great work!

[@kmm129]

Mr. Verbose Bastard, you are doing the work I only wish I could. Bless you and the lil woof's.

[@morganw.4711]

WHY GAD is a whole damn mood. The more cholla you get in you, the less you care.

[@1Caseup]

I see alot of cool life forms here in texas, I'm near all the creeks and rivers by grapevine lake. Everyone needs to be outside more

[@User-1543]

That little bee ass hanging out of the flower was cute, i thought the guy was totally dead/stuck though. “Step-bee help, I’m stuck”

[@nathansurrett2088]

Love this so much man, thank you for getting down to their level while filming. Such a great job.

[@tebalashara4895]

I love how he Respects nature and how he just leave it be

[@WindellDianthus]

your relationship with your dags really add a whole different element to these videos

[@paulpower5028]

your desert videos are the best. every plant is a treasure. and all this stones, minerals and fossils. it`s like another planet. planet earth can be so extraterrestrial!

[@NachozMan]

So blessed to of had found your channel, not many out there like you just showing and sharing your love for horticulture with us!

[@DrDjones]

As an archaeologist I love the little bit with the chert you added. That region has gone through so much change. So cool. Thanks, gfy

[@michaelnancyamsden7410]

Love this video. Fossilized wood and clam shells. Thanks for identifying these plants.

[@brittongolfwang]

fort Stockton(pecos county) native here living a thousand miles away. this made me homesick, beautiful place with some charming scenery

[@annk762]

You are such a pleasure to listen to and wonderful alternative, from,"NEWS" Love plants and rocks talk

[@jonnitrea]

Thank you for once again making my day so much more bearable

[@mattpeacock5208]

That place looks like a damned moonscape! Amazing anything can grow!!!

[@edavis316]

Just beautiful! The commentary just makes me laugh out loud - I needed this today!

[@thesilentone4024]

How does this say 3 weeks its a hour old video 😆

[@edavis316]

@@thesilentone4024 was on his Patreon group videos

[@thesilentone4024]

@@edavis316 ah

[@ashleyferris5749]

Best way to wake up on a Sunday morning ♥️♥️

[@persnicketyu5561]

What the frickin frack did I just find searching for good crops to grow in west Texas! Dying from laughter and still being educated, I wish school could have been this much fun! Moving to Hudspeth County soon to start my new life! Will keep watching your channel, thanks for the good time!

[@DrWeedMan]

Great episode. Enjoyed the fossils. After your show I end up talking like I’m from Chicago for about 2 hrs.

[@myla2102]

Merci,pour cette magnifique et prolifique promenade; belles découvertes botaniques, géologiques et des fossiles en plus !!!!!Splendide paysage si riche dans un milieu si difficile….et fragile. Merci, merci beaucoup!!!!! Je n’ai pas tout compris de vos commentaires mais j’ai partagé votre émerveillement devant toutes ces précieuses découvertes .

[@midesti]

If I taught botany, I would dedicate one day per week to watching and discussing a CPBBD video. EDIT: Yes, those chert nodules look suspiciously as if they were cracked open with bipolar percussion. I am an archaeologist on my day job.

[@thebrokenjay4279]

Man, your videos are lit. You make me laugh and learn. Also your accent is great. Thank you a lot, hope you keep it up.

[@BotanicManic]

That Phacelia is making me feel things I never thought I could... UGHH

[@danielpirone8028]

Limey was slang for a British sailor- they used limes to avoid scurvy. Why Gad?!!!

[@aquaticplantsavage6625]

You're one of the only thing keeping me sane during Covid.

[@gramursowanfaborden5820]

petrified wood is one of the coolest things ever.

[@Tommyr]

I find one all the time when I wake up in the morning!

[@myndall_]

"We all have our reasons for trauma. Don't mock it."💜✌

[@MrMotchel]

You bring my enthusiasm for botany out so well. I feel like I’m hanging out with a bud who’s really knowledgeable and laughing while learning. Keep it up man! Your videos are awesome.

[@louiscle1622]

Hey buddy. You gave me inspiration to follow my dreams. To confuse the nut f* out of my friends tiny thinking machines when we're out fartin about with plant knowledge. You sir are one of great many reasons i am a student in horticulture and natural urban deconcretification. Oh i will edit this in: thanks man.

[@johannasadventures3467]

Oh. My... You are so close! My favorite botanist is in my state!

[@wm4506]

Watching this after taking a botany class is even better. You're a fucking wizard!

[@stephenpmurphy591]

Corny common name's. Texas blue bonnet, yes corny. Golf ball with a foreskin, much improved not corny. Another informative and highly entertaining video. Thanks for the early morning upload.

[@whatabouttheearth]

Imagine of you wrote a botany field manual with his common names 😄 😄 😄 people would be so confused after ordering that from Amazon

[@markdevil199]

You’re truly inspirational, thank you Tony !

[@bostonmeadhorn4897]

Sounds like the hound needs REAL Scooby snacks

[@lunarsma8446]

Yeah, beautiful landscape, plants, and those desert sunsets, man. Always good, always nutritional. Appreciate you.

[@AardBewoner]

Thanks, impressive scenery!

[@markchinguz4401]

I just looked up what echino means, apparently it means "prickly/spiny", so they are prickly cacti

[@missywalker7846]

Love this! Good to see you in my neighborhood.

[@MUSTASCH1O]

16:31 Sometimes I wonder if these long dead botanists look down on you on your escapades, giggling in good humour haha.

[@XaViEr3520]

26:57 riles them up and they go coyote mode

[@seththebeatmxchine]

My man said i m gonna try and keep it short and went on for 45 minutes sheeeeesh what a banger.

[@talanigreywolf7110]

Joey, I would pay big money to hear you read Dr. Seuss!

[@gnored]

Glad you have been to see this area. It's one of my favorite spots in the Big Bend. The Crypthantha is endangered because of bentonite mining nearby. They'll bulldoze the whole place if it ever becomes profitable to do so.

[@stevenvarner9806]

Joey, someday I would like seeing a video on the Sonoran desert near Tucson, and the various southern California chaparral habitats and coastal sage scrub. GFYB.

[@Nobody-cw4wm]

Once again thank you!

[@durere]

Oh he deffinitely got his coffee today

[@ArtemisCelestia]

It's fucking incredible that you go to these places, see these incredible landscapes, and then mention that you're trespassing. Who the fuck could *own* this?

[@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt]

The whole philosophy itself is fucked. Society of the walking dead-inside.

[@michaelcarley9866]

Love this show.

[@stephaniestreet5281]

This entire video was just beautiful. Really. Thanks for all the education. I always learn so much!

[@dimitrisgonatas1457]

you should know you are a leaving legacy love from greece.i thing this is my favourite episode so beautiful nature

[@jtknight4647]

Much love from the SouthBay neighbor!!

[@Haerodiel]

This channel is the only place on earth where I can hear a cactus described as a golf ball with a foreskin, and trust me I cherish that.

[@illustriouschin]

Okay how can we send Mr. Tony back to the Cretaceous. We need to make this happen.

[@Hayley-sl9lm]

Toaster time machine

[@cole1200]

Maybe we can get him to drive a freight train backwards fast enough to go back in time.

[@swarfmaster]

@@cole1200 he might try

[@nonoluigi]

A De Lorean should do it. Start the GoFundMe.

[@snuugumz]

@@cole1200 You ever watch his episodes piloting those trains, and note the shit condition the railroad allows them to be in? It’s horrifying to think that men and women trying to earn a buck have to work under dose ridiculous circumstances. He would be better off in the DeLorean (also shit).

[@kindafoggy]

Iggy Pop looked great in one in "Deadman". At one time it was called Buffalo Clover as well as Bluebonnet. They very much resemble ladies sun bonnets from the 1800 Regency period. Worn in the back country to this day and in the seasonal orchards and harvesting industry where baseball caps haven't taken over. Poke bonnets kept your neck from burning to a crisp too. You probably don't like Bachelor Buttons or Dutchman's Britches either lol.

[@alicefly3198]

Thanks for posting!

[@Emi-wt5bm]

Really appreciate your content and your attitude. feel like im learning so much, really helping me feel more comfortable about plant names/families/genus which felt really overwhelming and confusing before. Thanks a bunch :) p.s. i love your Proteaceae videos. never seen half the plants in them videos before and they are amazing!!

[@MrAnymeansnecessary]

You been a part a my mental health for like 3 years or some shit. LUH u for dis 1🖤

[@BebopSpeaks]

Close-up camera work, niice!

[@happysalesguy]

Great video, thanks a lot!

[@wyokaiju992]

Yo, if you are ever doing some botany out in the Chalkbluffs of southern Wyoming, lets grab some coffee and go hiking

[@LOOMIS1638]

Awesome stuff! Thank you

[@noelbreitenbach8673]

“Psych ward green” lol

[@tjdomingue1]

certainly one of my favorite videos you've done, thank you!

[@lensperspective9753]

I love these because I'm a native American and many of these areas of my ancestors I'll never be able to see, so it's good to see this videos, I request you do more west texas/West Chihuahua like Ojinaga and surround border areas, Baja California areas like Ensanada, Tecate, La Huerta, etc, and also if you do another international trip I highly suggest the Basque Country whether that be in the pyrenees or beach

[@profmuthandi]

very interesting Echinocactus population! Thank you and greets from Germany

[@dndarchive3541]

I think it's possible that that chunk of white rock you found is white agate. You can find lots of agate in that area of West Texas, particularly in limestone or on top of old lava flows.

[@dianaesquivel31]

You made me laugh a couple of times and look at plants. Awesome! I love your videos, keep posting while you can.

[@antoinettebaxter2871]

Talking shit looking at plants! Love this!

[@cgriggsiv]

Extreme intelligence but dude you make me laugh and thank you very much

[@shastahill]

Thanks, verbose bastard! I'm heartily enjoying hearing from you about this gorgeous desert in the long, sparkly video. (Haha, visual personal hygiene PSA)

[@durere]

I'd lose my mind with all them fossils. Take me there and forget about me.

[@earthboundorganics747]

That camera looks great!!

[@Davidnumber23]

your a legend amongst plants man! ✌

[@LovingDeantheGodMachine333]

Got into botany and found this channel I will now watch every single video !😂🙏🏼 Just the way you relay knowledge while always getting me to crack a few laughs.

[@danielb3573]

First 15 seconds sums up my job at a plant nursery

[@abitoftheuniverse2852]

45:07 I enjoy listening to you more than looking at anything on the Earth or in the sky. Please, don't ever shut up.

[@crystalgaddy2985]

I appreciate the landscape there. I'm in the South, so much flora. Spider Lillies, flox and bluebells grow wild in my yard. Only 3 mushrooms this year, though. Well, they were till the heat hit this week. Love your channel!

[@H2OBoB1]

I love your attitude

[@MC-lw8dh]

Wow! I lived in Brewster county for 4 years and now I’m in the Bay Area. Very cool to be transported back there by this video. Fascinating area-best part of Texas in my humble opinion. Definitely a great area to find vugs and other cool rocks! And they’re not in season yet, but Buffalo gourds are a neat plant I miss from there.

[@Hayley-sl9lm]

Omg do a video at the Creation Museum!!! They might kick you out but maybe just talk quiet

[@canadiangemstones7636]

That would be utterly priceless!!!!

[@Haerodiel]

PLEASE!!!!

[@whatabouttheearth]

Him and Aron Ra at the same time would blow their fu*king minds.

[@rdizzy1]

Better off to not give them any media attention. That place needs to be left alone until it dies out and disappears from the face of the earth for good.

[@Hayley-sl9lm]

@@rdizzy1 True, maybe you're right. 😥

[@arkboy3]

Spent a lot of time doing Archaeology on Otero Mesa Ft Bliss, and WSMR getting bit by cholla and all things thorny.needly.

[@metfraser303]

holy cats, some of those are super rare and get poached a whole bunch. stay safe, little dudes.

[@whynothanks2047]

Just signed up for your course as a birthday present to myself, can’t wait!

[@shastahill]

Noice! Happy Birthday!

[@whynothanks2047]

@@shastahill thank you❤️

[@shastahill]

Certainly welcome ❤️

[@youssefmoharram5025]

"I meant to go back on psychedelics some time" 😂