the fear of love

[@ProfessorViral]

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[@Dimas-d1j]

Loving someone is painful, but being loved is scary

[@MeJustMe101]

Either way is enough for me to avoid it. But loving someone is what really makes me avoid it.

[@Kvnji]

What?

[@Torso_]

⁠@@MeJustMe101it’s scary, because when your in it, you don’t know weather your doing a good job or bad.

[@azrealclips]

this is the most accurate description i think i've seen of love yet.

[@MeJustMe101]

@@Torso_ I always see it like that

[@wendellcosta1867]

"Love is terrifying because it means loving ourselves enough to be loved." An amazing philosophic synthesis is always poetic. Love you Professor Viral.

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you so much!

[@SasisaPlays]

Now i get, why people say “love yourself first”

[@akita_inu-il6em]

Bs. You should love yourself bec this should protect you from ending up in toxic and/or abusive relationships. And because insecurities can be super annoying and even ruin your relationships (e.g. jealousy). That's it. Ppl who don't love themselves can love and be loved. No need to love yourself for others to love you. Complete bs.

[@GlennMorrow-lu4ee]

@@akita_inu-il6embro completely misunderstood

[@akita_inu-il6em]

​@@GlennMorrow-lu4ee explanation pls

[@Xoliam99]

Wow. "I can't tell if you like me" , "That's the point you idiot" is some of the hardest hitting yet accurate descriptions I've ever heard a stranger say.

[@ProfessorViral]

It's something I did for a long long time I'd never put words to until then

[@johnsontheone9804]

What is this line from?

[@fatblackcap4532]

how so?

[@arpitsea3824]

In the trigun remake, Vash said "No matter how heavy a cross you carry, you still deserve to eat,you still deserve to laugh" i love this quote.

[@Youaretheactionsofgod]

If only it was true. It is not. We deserve nothing but the bottom of the abyss and can only try to hold ourselves up from the fire.

[@techpriest6962]

Sounds like an overly optimistic quote.

[@hunterdna2257]

Just finished trigun last week, ever since I watched badlands rumble on toonami a decade ago I've known this truth

[@redtarget5275]

Sometimes, there's no other option but to be delusionaly happy. @@techpriest6962

[@ghostypunpun]

@@techpriest6962 How is telling people they deserve to be happy regardless of the burden they carry overly optimistic? Life can be really hard, so reminders like that can be really meaningful

[@dxnzaii9645]

“Love is so terrifying because we need to love ourselves enough to be loved.” What a quote

[@ProfessorViral]

This feeds my ego too much haha

[@jmh8817]

"It's not that calling love a transaction is bad even if it feels reductive. It's like trying to set a price when everyone has their own currency and there's no exchange rate." Bloody hell, they DID send a poet.

[@xxsnow_angelxx3953]

This is so real even with anxiety.

[@lennard5393]

I understand this logically but I can't feel it

[@lmtaylorr]

15:54 “if someone gives you there time and all you can do is lack energy , be sad or depressed why would they want to be around you?” Hit me on a personal level. Sadness is something that resonates with me in my personal life. AND i believe it’s okay to be sad sometimes. But I don’t want people to go away because of my sometimes sad demeanor

[@trash9005]

No one would want this, but it is that way, and nothing you can do can change the way it is. Just try to appear different till someone gets to know you etc. I mean your friends (I suppose you have at least one ACTUAL friend) would not just tell you to fuck off because you're sad. All it takes to just look appealing for someone to get to know you. And once they get to know your good sides it's just the way everybody else has it, no going away because you're sad involved. Of course the quote is still valid, if you're contributing nothing someone will just feel exploited and go. Being sad or depressed doesn't give you priviledge of taking from someone and giving nothing in return.

[@fancy_squirrel]

I relate to this comment a little too much

[@jeffmadmastermind3907]

As a person who struggles with depression, I can relate. Its very hard to me to get in a relationship, not even because I look sad or lack energy, but because I feel that I do not deserve love from someone else cuz I can't provide them the attention I believe they should have. "I'm not good enough, that they deserve someone better than me". This is so hard, cuz I do feel lonely, but I also dont want to impose those conditions and fears on my partner. Loving yourself is hard...

[@ghostypunpun]

It's okay to be sad and its okay to be depressed. We all go through it. A true friend should stay with you when you're at your lowest. That doesn't necessarily mean making them your therapist or constantly relying on them to the point it's hurtful, but being a friend is about giving time, caring, and warmth regardless of if you get something in return. Don't be afraid to open up. They are probably struggling too and will take comfort from knowing they aren't alone. In my experience, I've formed my deepest connections by opening up about what I'm experiencing and having the other person open up in return.

[@trash9005]

@@ghostypunpun keyword "return" if it goes just one side for whatever the reason it's not ok most of the time and friendship will likely fall apart

[@wingficwithoutwings]

Violet Evergarden was the first anime to genuinely make me tear up. It was the aspect of the fact that she had no clue what love was with the man that took care of her telling her "i love you" as parting words just hit me.

[@juanitopantuflapantufla2605]

For me the most terrifying part is being vulnerable, trusting someone who I have no reason to trust even if I know that most people wouldn't betray you if you told them your insecurities, every time I've done that I have made a friend, or they didn't care, but every time it is terryfing, and I feel like im ripping myself open for them, and trusting them to not take my heart and blow it up.

[@SkullScar]

Trust issues are an old classic Some of us cant even make proper friends without their prejudices/artificed/caricatured version of us

[@beansworth5694]

This is honestly the biggest part of love issues that I don't relate much to. I don't trust people to not betray me about my insecurities, but doing anything but wearing them on my sleeve is too exhausting to bother. Most people suck in at least one way or another, and I know I do, but I'd rather just try to be kind and fail to be anything but annoying than jump through hoops my whole life in a game of pretend to save my ego- it just isn't worth it. It's a bit different when a person you care for also has power over you, but barring that dynamic I don't see any point to hide anything other than myself (as in just not being around) because I know who I am and one way or another if someone spends enough time around me they'll figure it out too, so really from my perspective there's nothing to lose except a grace period of deluded feelings of acceptance if you're just yourself. Trying to live in the headspace of someone you're not is just depressing, more so than just being alone at least to me.

[@BeepieBoop]

Holy crap, this video made me cry. From reminding me of past relationships and even friendships that crumbled after broken promises to finally learning to love myself after giving one too many pieces of myself away, I understand that yes, love is scary. It’s painful, especially the inevitable loss that comes with it, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. We learn from our mistakes, from the hurt we didn’t intentionally mean to give. We do the best we can and sometimes, for people it’s enough. The saying “you must love yourself before you love others” was told to me often, and in a way, it rings true, but not in a way that means you must refrain from loving others until you see yourself in that same devotion and admiration. I see it in a way that means you can give the world and everyone in it all of your love and time and until you realize that you doing that means something, that it’ll always mean something to someone out there, it’ll make you feel empty. Humans were born to hurt, but more importantly, to love, but we often forget that we are deserving of that love. I hope anyone reading this understands that nobody is born into this world to be alone. Someone loves you, and if nobody does right now, someone will in time.

[@mr.pearly7478]

I haven't even watched this video yet lol, but I broke up from my first relationship 3 months ago today and woke up this morning with the worst pain I've felt since the breakup, after dreaming about her. Stupidly I checked her social media to find she found another guy just a month after breaking up, which only made things worse. Just reading this comment put me on the verge of tears but made me feel a bit calmer after the fact, thank you for your words!

[@polkol4653]

@@mr.pearly7478its been almost 7 years since my last relationship ended. She still visits when I sleep and it never really stopped hurting. I haven’t found anyone who truly sees me for me and I still hope that one day my world will be brighter again. The pain never stops but then again neither does the world and we must always move forward no matter how hard it may be.

[@Hehermes]

I really like this comment as it remind me of Nico Robin from one piece "No one is born into this world to be alone."

[@BansheeKing22]

Except for me. Not a single woman on this entire planet wants me. I was born to be alone. Im pathetic, ugly as shit and unworthy of love.

[@charlurk]

i havent seen enough people talk about the fear of being loved - the pain of not feeling worthy of it, not understanding why someone stays by your side when all you see is a nobody in yourself. i hate this because i know so many people wish they had people love them. but i have never felt worthy of it, and still dont. people love me and stick by my side, when im just thinking about the absolute destruction of my own being. when i just wish i could destroy myself.

[@MultiNaruto900]

26:15 "Love is terrifying because it means loving ourselves enough to be loved."

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you 🙏🙏

[@arson338]

I can say this love is the greatest feeling you could ever know but at the same time the longer that feeling lasts the more it will create a pain that can't be dulled once once it's been torn out of you

[@ProfessorViral]

For sure. I'd often tank relationships earlier for that reason as well. Less possible hurt later on

[@sav_2805]

I always appreciate the vulnerability and thought you put into your videos, got me tearing up my last hour at work lol. I'm a person with an avoidant attachment style, who has yet to love or be loved. So I think you're quite brave.

[@ProfessorViral]

I always feel like its just weakness, knowing I can hurt people but doing it anyway. But I guess thats what most of us do, we just dont always overthink it

[@jakariashafin1695]

Pretty relatable.

[@poifish7442]

@@ProfessorViral its really telling for the nature of self-worth when two people holding the exact opposite ends of a stick both feel they're weak for doing so and admire the other side for the perceived strength

[@Amiraurgirl]

I feel so much guilt. It’s all hitting now. When you said that you were 16 and meant ‘I love you’ for the first time… I remembered. We were 16, sitting on a tree in his favourite spot, no one but us stretching over a never ending field in the summer. In that moment I felt this anticipation that something was going to happen… the way he looked at me and shifted around. He said the three words. “I love you.” In that moment I couldn’t think, but I smiled. I don’t know why I smiled, but I know that I was feeling sorry for him. That second I thought ‘why would he love someone that doesn’t love him back?’ But I think again and maybe it makes sense? We were in a relationship after all. I know that I’m the problem for staying with someone who I wasn’t so sure about but knew that he was obsessed with me. In that moment it just slipped out. I said it back and smiled. I felt like horns were growing out of my head. I lied. It never got better from there and I soon broke up with him. I wish he had someone better than me… someone who loved him back.

[@ProfessorViral]

It's just the cost of being human. To live and learn about others comes at the cost of others. There's no helping if someone's feelings grow stronger than yours, and there are moments to break up and moments to not. In the end, it's all experince that'll lead to better things

[@Daraks69haha]

Relationship is like entering the building, when it is just a friendship you enter it but keep the door open and you’re ready to leave anytime, when it is love you enter the building, you lock the door and throw the only keys out, so when the building collapses you collapse with it too

[@Kami-x-Nero]

This is absolutely the best video essay on love I’ve ever watch… words can’t explain how much I resonated with this.

[@samuelngundi1847]

"Love is terrifying because it means, loving ourselves enough to be loved"

[@ProfessorViral]

There's quite a few comments quoting that line, and it makes me much happier than it should haha

[@phaguette3164]

i think this is one of the most confessional youtube videos i've ever watched. you captured the absolute catharsis of love, the honeymoon, the newfound feeling of knowing the power you hold by just saying the three words "i love you" i feel like this. im in a new relationship now, and im feeling lost and cautious, yet this video reminded me the beauty and my short-coming of over-rationalizing love. thank you.

[@ProfessorViral]

Of course. I'm glad I could be a part of that for you

[@mandothepotato2321]

Love was terrifying to me because I never believed it or that I could be loved. I loathed myself too much and too far. When I started bettering myself, it wasn't just for me but it was to be valued. When someone liked me, I couldn't believe it. I was delusional and in denial about having worth. She confessed and I accepted out of a sense of responsibility. I was afraid and couldn't voice my fears for fear of being seen as weak. She told me she loved me and I knew how much it meant to her so I said it back, but I didn't understand it. I abused something I couldn't understand & hurt her on accident. She lied and made an excuse to end it and I couldn't do anything. I found out later and hated myself for ever doing anything wrong to her. It wasn't entirely my fault but I blamed myself for everything. She wanted nothing to do with me so I couldn't even apologize. My remorse was meaningless because to her I was meaningless. Nothing more than a bad experience. It feels wrong to know someone who loved and wanted to be around you every second, now wants nothing to do with you and actively avoids you if in the same room. I will continue to see myself as the villain but I don't how long I can loathe myself.

[@trash9005]

at least you realise you're just delusional about it, it's a step to actually change it. The way it is you are really unlovable, how could someone really love and support person who doesn't even love them back. Some of us don't even get lucky enough for a girl to tell you this once. You are really lucky in fact for this to happen to you, all you had to do was to just love someone back, or at least tell her how it really is. You can't just wail about being unlovable if you won't even give people a chance. You're not a villain, life ain't anime, just don't get into something you can't handle. And also work on yourself to be able to handle it in X time.

[@jeffmadmastermind3907]

Creating an image of self worth is something I struggle with as well. Some people call it Impostor syndrome, as you feel you dont deserve the things that happens to you. what can I say to you is: you have worth, and you need to acnowledge that. You have value. We are in constant evolution. You are not the same as you were before that girl appeared in your life. You learned things the hard way, but this is life, everyone fuck up sometimes, but the failures teach better that the victories. What you do with what you learn, with your experiences, is the key part of the process. Be a better you, improving with every thing you live. We cant control everything that happens around us, but we can choose how to react to it.

[@andv993]

I have no words to describe how I feel after watching this. Just, thank you for this video, for the openness, for every minute of it

[@ProfessorViral]

No problem at all, thank you for such nice words 💙

[@Joypanese]

Your videos are so well put together. I hope your channel grows and blows up so more people can see your creative work, keep it up.

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you, the support really does mean so much. I am hoping to grow and make this my full time job someday, but I am always happy to have what I already do : )

[@dontbreaktheyokepls8365]

I have not truly cried in such a long time, but your video made me sob and I'm so grateful for that. Thank you, I so rarely am able to even cry and it felt so good to let it out. Your experiences were relatable and helped me think on my own past mistakes, my avoidance of love despite chasing relationships, having them fail over and over including recently. I am terrified of love too, I never knew it growing up and it's a hard thing to accept love when the only thing I knew was being hated. I may not know love between people very well, but I can wholeheartedly say I love your content and mean it.

[@natepolk9663]

When I clicked for this video as background noise while I mined stone and collected wood on my MC world, I did not expect to genuinely pause what I'm doing to listen in.

[@GamerVB1539]

Hearing the authenticity of your personal story of love is the reason why I love channels like yours. Being able to relate and to sympathize, even empathize, with your mistakes and feelings makes me feel like I should keep watching this person. This person has had the luxury of experiencing life from its highest to lowest points and should have an audience to learn from it or to rationalize their own from their stories. The anime stories help too, but nothing is better than the real ones

[@Khaoscntrl]

I really hate how much your life's pivotal moments seem to mirror mine its almost infuriating. I love your video essays because I love delving into the psych of these characters personalities and reasonings and just talking about stories on this level is fun to me. I also love your personal stories at the end because they are just SO engaging to listen to. But I've also found myself really understand and relating with each one and I cannot say how both comforting... and emotionally devastating it is to feel that? Long sob story no one asked for below: Very much the same, my first brush with what I assumed was love was later revealed to be my own personal manic pixie dream girl, someone who came into my life and just... swept it, changed everything. We spent everyone moment together for years, and I do mean EVERY. MOMENT. From dawn to dusk we would talk, play games, chat, well into my late teens and adult hood. 14 years. Somewhere in that 14 I saw the cracks, the sudden demands and commands, they accused me of cheating, and though I'd done nothing of the sort they could not be wrong... so by default I was. So in some crazy attempt to course correct and prove my innocence... I stopped talking to anyone. I could prove them wrong if there was nobody BUT them. They could introduce me to friends, they could monitor who I spoke to.. and when they got mad that I was friends with their friends... I'd back off and just wait for my turn. I fell into this comfortable notion of waiting for what they wanted, but when you hit 24 and start realizing what you want and you get more tired you stop trying so hard to please. So we fought, because I wasn't putting in effort anymore to be loved by them. It was a pathetic experience that only recently ended and I find myself disgusted that I still love them but also looking back and wondering if I'd done things differently if it could have ended differently; or if I knew this was the only possible way for our relationship to go. I held onto it because I had no one else. Yes they could be disgustingly cruel, and yes they could be demeaning and demanding and they could never EVER be wrong but... when things were good they were good so I was just being a bitch right? Couldn't let a little emotional manipulation destroy my relationship, this absolute love, who else would love me like that? It had been proven more then once, no one. They'd stuck with me for 14 years, no one else would do that with someone they hated so clearly I was being dramatic right? Or, like you said, we fed off each others rage and frustration; I was no better there. Part of growing from that experience was realizing also what I could have done, I could have stood up for myself, I could have told them to chill out, I could have made some other friends anyway and just muscled through the anxiety so we weren't smothering each other with our company. The 'I could haves' of life will haunt you forever, but we press forward for all the new 'glad I dids' instead, I suppose. Long story short, its sad to hear your experiences but thankyou for sharing them. Cause it makes some of us feel like just a little less of fuck-ups to realize its... not just us.

[@sol4976]

having broke up with my ex after 3 long years i still remember holding her and not knowing what she had done wrong but knew that i was falling out of love. having a shaky family life i would use her as a crux to support my dwindling sense of self. it left me longing not for her but what she represented, a warm hand gliding through my hair, a tight grasp her two arms binded me promising to not let me go, atleast not until i was feeling better. The pain was that i knew i wasn’t going to be better as long as i was with her. Not knowing myself i would begin to be brutually honest with her, telling her the truth of my feelings but skewing it in a way that meant staying together was the right option. She never understood the real me because if she did she would breakup, and that’s secretly what i wanted. I didn’t want to break her heart

[@sol4976]

good video btw👍

[@E46_wagonlover]

I have debated on saying it but I want to say that I understand all of it. The girl that you loved but she didn’t reciprocate it. The girl that loves you but you are afraid she doesn’t really know you so you push her away. The girl that makes you feel alive again and you can tell you do it for her too, just for you to have to get on a plane and leave never to talk to her again unless in your dreams. God I had to stop playing the game I as playing and listen to every word you said cause it was almost as if you were reciting Word for Word the things I’ve spend years of my life thinking about.

[@ViridianCrisis7]

Seeing a explanation of the fear I feel but have issues expressing wasn’t what I planned for at 8am but it’s oddly comforting. Your videos are always so personal and it’s great to see how much you pour your own emotions into your discussions

[@jaetrnn6000]

The most important love is the love for yourself, from yourself. When you are able to do that, you won't feel a need for someone else to fill that void anymore. Even if someone did, no single person can fill your need and longing for love. Self love grants a romantic relationship the possibility to be something more then codependency. It can be fun, it can be meaningful, it can be financially freeing, it can be fulfilling. It becomes something that can complements and enriches your life instead of being something you rely on to feel okay and to keep yourself afloat. Self love comes fundamentally from understanding yourself, spending time with yourself and learning about your interest and dislikes. Think about who you are. In psychology this is called identity or a sense of self. When you understand yourself and are able to sit with yourself to listen to what your body needs, and learning a deeper understanding of yourself over time, you wont need others to cover over your symptoms, you'll learn to be able to address the root causes of what is making you feel discomfort.

[@rvolvr3650]

This is the most genuine emotion I’ve probably ever heard. And I just…….. it feels like I’m feeling for the first time. Keep your chin up man. People will love you. I understand this emotion and this pain. But you will feel. And people will feel for you.

[@M3124-t5f]

Recently i got so broken by the girl i loved that i returned to my previous position of isolation and lack o trust. But i know that this is not the way and I'm trying to improve. You always have a home to return, you can always choose to be kind and at peace, suffering is the way of the world and when we accept it struggling against It feels lighter and loving more natural. I still love her with all my heart and understand that she's broken Just like me, she needs to heal so do i

[@MrToastBTW]

My first love was horrible for both sides. This was way to close to home... and I'm glad. Having a situation be relatable and just being able to process it.

[@thegoldensamurai2004]

This video has honestly opened my eyes to what it truly means to love and be loved. You have to be willing to accept not only your partner but also yourself as well. Loving someone will always be a risk but it is one that you should never shy away from as doing so as it will ultimately help to grow and develop as a person.😌

[@elios7623]

it doesn't matter how hard or scary love is, we shouldn't stop trying at it, it's the most valuable thing one can give to others, but it's also the hardest thing one can create

[@ProfessorViral]

Very true. It's tough all around, but that's all a testament to its power given we still search it out

[@elios7623]

@@ProfessorViral yeah, mostly love for ourselves (not just saying "i love you" to the mirror, but actually eating healthy, doing exercise etc etc)

[@paulalahoz626]

The way you put your vulnerability out there heals a lot of things inside me. Thanks, an amazing video.

[@devonbotney2762]

As someone who has a hard time expressing their love for others due to many factors, I got emotional so many times during this video. Such a beautiful way to put these emotions into words and such a hard thing to do. Thanks for your work

[@korcommander]

I would think one of the biggest things that comes with love is having the courage to be responsible for yourself but for others as well. It ain't something folks are born with. It's something we all have to earn. All we can do is hope we suffer well to be a beacon on strength to the whole world.

[@powdereyes2210]

I don’t know why but just by watching this video for less than 10 minutes my heart was beating out of my chest It’s like I feel stress even hearing someone talk about it even if what they say is true and something that I’ve already realized

[@tomchan300]

This Man has gone through so much, and was such a mentor to be sharing this with everyone else. Respect to him.

[@jaykay-_-ok]

The Complexity of Love and Human Emotions: 💔 Despite experiencing pain from love, there is still a strong desire and drive for connection and reassurance, highlighting the complexity of human emotions and the longing for understanding without causing harm. 💔 Love is inexplicable because it goes beyond the physical world and is interpreted differently by each individual. 💔 Love is a complex and multifaceted emotion that cannot be easily defined or explained in words. 💕 Love is seen as inherently valuable and beautiful, even if it is just a chemical response in our brains, as it speaks to the essence of the human condition and influences our art, communication, and interactions. 🌱 Vash, the main character in the video, challenges the stereotype of a feared outlaw by being a goof and having a soft spot for donuts, highlighting the complexity of his character. 💔 Vash's ability to both offer and take away so much from the world and its inhabitants reflects the complex and unpredictable nature of love. 😍 The speaker describes the overwhelming joy and relief they felt when their partner said "I love you," emphasizing the powerful impact that love can have on an individual's emotions. 😍 The power of simple words and gestures from someone you love can have a lasting impact, creating cherished memories that are kept close to the heart. Love's Power to Heal and Harm: 💔 Love can be terrifying because it requires learning and communicating what each person can give, but the levels of giving and taking don't necessarily have to be equal. 💬 Effective communication is essential in relationships, as it allows us to understand and provide what the other person truly needs, even if it may be different from our own desires. 💔 Love can be terrifying not only because of the potential for personal pain but also because of the harm it can cause to others. 💔 The speaker reflects on the emptiness of saying "I love you" without truly meaning it, highlighting the impact of emotional manipulation and abuse in their relationships. 😨 Love has the power to both make and break us, and this terrifies the speaker even years later. The Impact of Love on Self-Worth and Personal Growth: 💔 Violet's experience as a child soldier highlights the damaging effects of never having been loved and the struggle to understand the meaning of "I love you" without any context or emotional connection. 🤔 Shoya questions whether he is deserving of love and wonders if his past actions can ever be atoned for, highlighting the struggle for self-worth and the perception of deserving love. 💔 Vash avoids getting too attached to people because he would have to witness their pain and never be able to solve it, hurting himself endlessly. 💡 The realization of being afraid of being loved too is a significant turning point in one's perspective on relationships.

[@thenigerundayooooguy2752]

bro its criminal for your quality content to get such low views

[@ProfessorViral]

I'd love more to support myself off of this alone, but honestly these numbers are more than I ever imagined!

[@oyryboros782]

100k views

[@redspec01]

I agree, ProfessorViral has earned my subscription.

[@Ocer.]

I think it is because he is talking about anime. It personally put me off but I stayed and really thought it was a good video anyway

[@notus299]

I agree that it's really well edited with pretty good quality but idk I wouldn't watch this kind of content except for this outlier

[@eve3455]

Thank you for the food! Hope everyone has a great day, I'll be returning to my work and trying not to sob my eyes out because man when Viral goes on their rants, I just can't help but feel touched. :)

[@ProfessorViral]

I'm conflicted, I'm glad it was powerful but I'm sorry to make work harder haha. Hope your day goes well too!

[@eve3455]

@@ProfessorViral No need to be sorry at all! It keeps me on my toes if nothing else, hahaha. It feels like I've had a harder time coming across channels that are willing to speak as passionately on their topics as some of yours do. I'm sorry if it sounds strange but these videos are an incredible comfort throughout the week. Even if they make me emotional, pfft.

[@esfomeada_1015]

This is one of those videos I'm definitely gonna watch from time to time. I like how it's just reflections and thoughts, like someone writing letter to themselves. Gave me a lot to ponder on

[@ProfessorViral]

These videos really are just big letters to myself. I tend to figure myself out through understanding the more defined puzzles of characters, who were created with a specific intent. It's one big journey of learning what being human really is, I guess

[@imperiumVII]

You just gave Fujimoto the idea to create the Love Devil

[@ProfessorViral]

I'll expect at least 5 cents in return for this

[@juuliano1383]

Crazy how this video shows up out of the blue on a lonely night just like that of which you said in the video. I was able to understand a little bit more about love through your insights and story. Thanks for sharing something you keep close to your heart. That takes a whooooole lotta bravery. Will definitely follow you for your content.

[@hillbillysamurai]

My last relationship messed me up so bad it's over been 10 years since I've even tried to have another. It's terrifying to think about investing so much of yourself into another relationship knowing how easily it can all go wrong

[@otismcfeely6401]

Going on 15 years, I lost the heartache but the scars still show.

[@loganscott8243]

13 years still going on but still as much I want to love again I know far to well it will destroy me again.

[@ThisJess]

As a thirty something who grew up in a strict Mormon religion, I will admit anime helped me gain emotional maturity as a teenager and young adult. My first marriage was one of escape, and love through strife and differences. he was an atheist musician on an angst mission and I was the devoted wife, content with his infidelities, wanting him to also care for me like he did his music and mistresses. Id destroyed myself to be with him. 1 year, divorced, and 10 years later he misses me and what he had in me that he can never have again. And I can look at the love I have now with security and knowledge that we have each other's backs through thick and thin, no infidelities needed (it took years to get here... but we're here now).

[@rein_nii]

This video really found me in just when I've been feeling more unsure of my view of love. It hurts being reminded but I'm happy to feel seen through this video and being able to relate to something. Beautiful video.

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you, I'm glad it found you at the right time like that 💙

[@Hendur]

Feeling like you have a monster inside of you, that will only just hurt everybody who gets too close to you, is one of the most cruel thoughts someone can have about themselves...

[@Tea_princess]

Thank you so much for this video. It made me understand the person who rejected me after seemingly being in relationship. The racing thoughts at the end made me feel like I understand it just a little more. As a person on the opposite side I was really frustrated that their thoughts are so contradictory, but it must be an excruciating pain - being so scared of hurting someone end hurting someone in the end because of that. If you don't want to hurt others, please go to therapy to heal yourself and end this cycle of pain.

[@Pianohnonono]

Honestly one of my favorite stories about love is actually chainsaw man, it explains love in such a human way, It isn't good or bad objectively. It's awfully beautiful and horribly awful. SPOILERS AHEAD. watch the show: Denjj starts off with this completely primitively view of intimacy, he doesn't care about love and just wants any kind of intimacy. Aki and Himeno are also good examples, Himeno works in an industry where people die constantly, yet despite this she still gets attached to people, contrary to Aki who tries to avoid attachment but over time not only gets attached to Himeno but changes for her, even taking up smoking which he completely objected to before, when Himeno is killed Aki starts working towards his goal with an iron resolve, when the future devil grants him a chance to know how he dies he refuses. Because Himeno's death gave him resolve to achieve his goals, in general csm is a love driven story that explores every different type of love, not just romantic

[@ArchiduquesaMA]

You just described 99% of animes

[@imperiumVII]

I wouldn't be surprised if we end up seeing a Love devil

[@yakobi8434]

Eh, Chainsaw Man’s main theme is about love more than most anime imo. Specifically, the tortures of how our ego reacts with it (loving the idea of someone versus genuine loving that person)

[@lolgamer9824]

"thank you"is what my brain is saying in the 40min. Again and again and again and i don't know why. Maybe u gave me an answer to the emotion that everyone else around me is feeling. Many people say they can't feel emotions, "there hollow" but I'm am that hollow. I can't cry or feel sad, even when I was a kid my Father has never seen me cry only when I was physically hurt. My Father left the country for 8 months to make us a better life,even knowing that i didn't cry. After 8 months i left my home country fullfiled with crime, to a new better to live country, after reunite with my father, i didn't feel joy, hate or .....something. I was having fun exploring the big airport and an new country, but nothing towards people or living beings. Now 6 years past that incidence,i can control my nonexistening emotions. Now i can cry when I need to. I can laugh at a joke without Someone knowing it's fake. Now i can manipulate people in thinking of me how i want to. I can lie like a god. Sometimes it's so exhausting that i do what is called "the poker face" or my real face for an hole day or more until i sleep and repeat the these "emotions" . . . .

[@lolgamer9824]

I didn't want to go this deep

[@ZaibachEmpire]

Appreciate how deep and personal you dived into this video

[@xxsnow_angelxx3953]

Thank you for being honest, I'm reduced to tears with similar struggles.

[@aidanconway6183]

I am terrible at love. I’ve been used for it tricked and fooled about it over and over again. Yet still I find myself loving others unconditionally. The worst part about love is you can give all of it away to other you can love someone truly with all your heart. But it feels oh so pointless when they don’t do the same back or even try to. Loving yourself is only the true surefire way to know that you’re loved and yet who wants to only be loved by themselves that’s a cruel fate in the end. I want to live my life surrounded by others when I die. But I know I’ll just be there for everyone else until it’s my turn to pass and I’ll realize not a single person is there for me.

[@bridgergriffiths4364]

To me, love is weakness. Now is weakness bad, not necessarily but it is true weakness. You let people into a place that contains something that would cripple you bad if damage even Achilles Heel would be marked as strong in comparison. But if they enter that place and love you still then it is the greatest feeling in the entire world... So I hope at least. Every single person I let into that place has stabbed straight through it, my Parents being no acception. I now let no one in their because I am already so broken that I can't risk it again in fear of my darkest thoughts finally winning which they have almost won already. So when I say this I hope you can understand that I mean the best when I say this. Don't end up like me, charge forward and find people who will love you because they do exist, you just haven't found them yet. And when you find them treat them like the most valuable things in your life because they are.

[@marsoop]

Man... I'm only half through the video and already almost cried three times

[@mauritsbol4806]

If you ever commit to love, remember that love is nothing what it seems like. It is fundamentally based on uncertainty, communication, and expectation (or better yet lack there of). It is built on anxiety, being afraid, and fear, yet the most addicting and enticing game we play. Love is beautiful and miserable. Love is hating and loving. Love is emotion. Love is an exploration into our own humanity.

[@mauritsbol4806]

In that sense, not knowing is the best way to fall in love, yet it is the worst way to maintain a relationship. If you want to have success in love, know nothing, but be curious. Every problem on the way needs to be figured out and overcome. Make it a commitment, to learn about yourself and the other.

[@mauritsbol4806]

In other words, recognizing you don’t know anything about love, is the best way to find love.

[@mauritsbol4806]

Also, this idea of vulnerability and weakness explains love from a fundamental point of view. It is a reward for trust. What i still wonder with this definition is how it distinguishes from friendships. While friendships feel differently, the model described here doesn’t differentiate between the two. In both states familiarity plays part as a proxy for safety, but still the difference seems to be there

[@mauritsbol4806]

There is this idea of the caregiver. That being loved is merely a mistake as you didn’t fundamentally change anything between 9 months old and 25 years old. So if you feel loved it feels literally like you are being taken care of and weak and powerless. Simultaneously loving someone is another mistake of humanity, because it can’t differantiate between your 9 month old baby, and your babe. It is about caring and nurturing. In that sense, loving and being loved is in both cases a mistake, as the body misinterprets/fails to distinguish a much more potent and evolutionary significant of raising/being raised

[@asher3929]

I am going to sob this is the most beautiful video I've ever heard, you have such a way with your words and you put so much meaning behind it.

[@Zackaboil]

when just the title makes u shed a tear, you know you're far gone

[@gabrielcerminara8257]

Me and my girlfriend broke up 2 months ago. I have been having a hard time with it. This video somehow lifted something off my shoulders. Thank you, for just randomly popping up on my feed. Much love and take it easy out there. Keep making videos, I'll watch.

[@Dock284]

I don't hate myself. I got over hating myself after almost going through with suicide. But after not doing that I kind of just got over it. I don't hate myself anymore. I mean I still think I'm ugly and kind of lazy but I still don't hate myself. Loving yourself is more difficult than some people realized. Self deprecation is a coping mechanism for some a very depressing thought. This video didn't make my cry. I don't even think I can cry outside of stubbing my toe because god damn it that hurts.

[@starofsouls1232]

I actually shed tears at this video and the power of your words. I felt everything you said so hard, and I've never cried to a youtube video before. Thank you so much for this. So amazing, I can't even describe how good this video is.

[@Levin_arkade]

You described a feeling I've had incredibly well with your story. Tried and failed for years to describe it myself in a way others could understand. It's oddly pleasant knowing someone else knows that specific feeling. So thanks, I mean it.

[@FryyLoL]

Whats worse is having spent years with someone for it to come to an end and getting over it to find someone new. My gf and I broke up a couple of days ago and I've honestly just been lost since. Thanks for the video, it has helped alot

[@cailer28000]

The end is so sad and yet so touching I almost cried. Magnificent video

[@elpapastv1576]

I had a supposed relationship with one girl in 9th grade for 3 months. Those 3 months are a blur to me but I still remember some important moments from the both of us. Like when I told her about my other relations with other girls, akd my love becoming an obsession. Or when I helped her in her worst moments. She was everything to me, and it was something I holded dear for. But one day she said to me that she just wanted us to be friends, specifically friends with benefits. I couldnt explain to you how much it cost me to realize that I was in love with her not because of her, but what she represented: a caring person who cared about my feelings. Turns out, I was the same for her. I dont know what love is, neither do I want to. It feels complicated and at this moments in my life I dont have time for love anymore. Thanks for reading this internet stranger. Goodbye.

[@alfonsosaenz1419]

i haven’t cried since February of last year. thank you

[@ProfessorViral]

No problem at all, I'm glad it was impactful : )

[@CerosTheBot]

Thank you for making this video it made me realize that I need to find the love within myself and grow into the best person I can to love.

[@horuho245]

i cried while watching this video, i couldnt look away at the personal story part thank you for sharing your essays, i also watched the fear of being genuine video and it also struck a chord

[@ProfessorViral]

Of course, thank you for letting me share them! I hope the emotions they bring out can help lead to great things for you

[@tacitcentaur3422]

This video has genuinely brought me a new perspective on love, I’ve been too scared to love this one girl back as much as she does for me, too scared I’ll be a disappointment and too scared to take things to the next level because of my own past. But thanks to this I’m going to try and make things right and stop being selfish about my own feelings and hope we sort this out! Much love man this has been such a eye opener

[@toonyproductions3964]

love is something that has no 1 answer. We all perceive it in our own ways, and we discover it through our own means and experiences. Even now as a 21 y/o man who has been single for 99% of his entire life, I have not lost the faith and hope that I and many others will meet someone we can truly say we love. For me personally, I feel it boils down to simply having the human compassion to give someone a chance, rather than immediately getting uncomfortable and brushing someone off.

[@joaovitor2456]

This fear of love destroys me inside. I had to lost someone dear to me to aknoledge this. When i was with her it as good but then i became anxious and she did nothing to trigger me and now i am alone again and kinda empty. It occurs to me everyday that "it was my fault, if i could retain this fear of control it she wouldn't have to go" and now i miss her so much but i can't go back because of this fear. I wish i could get to her all the love she deserved. My only hope now is that we maybe cross paths again down the road and maybe i'll have another shot to do things right, but do i deserve another chance? I had one and screwed up so i don't know...

[@blodhgarm7854]

Honestly... I cried when you narrated your experience. I was in the same boat my teen years, I was almost always silent, there were times I spent 2-3 days without talking with no one. Even though I had brothers we were each in their own world. But what really made me cry was when you narrated about how it went. I never got to experience a relationship to this day, and because of my age I'm pretty convinced i never will, it's good to know how it happened for someone, never heard people talking about it... Great video.

[@gabrielfeijao590]

I think people in the commentary's misunderstood the meaning of the sentence: "Love is terrifying because it means loving ourselves enough to be loved". It's not that love is impossible without self-love, we only can love ourselves if we have external proof that we can be loved. But at the same time, we have to learn and recognize that we are lovable. And that can be very difficult to some people. Self-sabotage can make us think that we are a farce and that we are tricking people to love us. In a world that constantly bring us down if we think highly of ourselves, it's more easy to stay low. So love is not a extreme of love yourself to be loved or not need to love yourself to be loved. It's a mutual work between you and the other person. You just need to be strong enough to recognize that're something in yourself that's worth loving.

[@titan3753]

Love is dangerously beautiful

[@TehDanxorz]

Your videos tend to always have a lot of yourself in them. The stories of your life giving your chosen topics that feeling of grounded reality. This one, most of all, reminded me of my past. Of those who I once loved and those who I was loved by. I don't know if I wanted to feel this way on a Friday afternoon but here we are. One of my favorite videos of yours so far.

[@gendor5199]

No matter how often I watch these videos I always find myself feeling afterwards like I got it, and then missed the point, trying to scroll back to "catch the last minute TLDR", and it is never there, even if I felt so close with the video.

[@michaelwh916]

I have been watching your videos for a while now. I have had similar experiences... especially as a young adult/teen. Self-harm is not healthy but it's nice to know that there are others that have had similar struggles. I had/have a fear of love that started with my parents as well. Thanks for your honest and open sharing. Love your videos fam.

[@flannagus4787]

I can't process the feelings that came over me after watching this video. But your video has really helped me gain a new perspective on love itself. Thank you.

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you for the kind words, I'm glad i could help in that way

[@Incrementium]

It's ironic the first anime brought up is one that explicitly relates to the topic at hand very personally for me. Violet Evergarden was something my ex-fiance had been watching around the time she left me and kinda broke my whole world into pieces. So basically why I explicitly have a fear of love now. I had to pause for a solid minute to work out if I have the emotional energy to open that wound at the moment.

[@padrearyan1645]

The one thing that I fear is love , knowing that one day the world will move on , knowing one day one of us will die , knowing one can betray. I have been through all of these things. My whole family line has heart problems and/or even cancer . I don’t believe in god I believe I’m what I believe , and that is hope . Love is a burden to some , love is strength to others . Love to me is a way to show your weakness and be vulnerable . So what you will and shall . The strongest feeling and horror is love . Cyberpunk edge runners really did show me how fucked up I am:)

[@relytllorrac7992]

Thank you for speaking about your memories. I’ve been in the position of having someone love me who I didn’t love back and sought to atone for that unfairness by suffering in silence. I left her 18 months ago and we are both doing much better. Your videos are awesome!

[@ProfessorViral]

Thank you. I'm glad you were both able to learn and grow from your experiences in this same vein as well!

[@jongkok2213]

This video's me questioning so much about myself, what I've done and who I am to the people around me. Broke down multiple times while watching and DAMN, I never thought a youtube video would do something like that. Amazing job man, thank you so much for making this video

[@Static.bibl3]

not even a min and im cryingish (the way you where talking and actually thinking about it was interesting and made me tear up)

[@kalebarneson8942]

Ive recently become tired/worn-out of love rather, Ive always been obsessed with being with someone up until recently. This video has helped me find some answers as to why, thank you for that, looking forward to future uploads😊

[@grayearly3116]

What's crazy is this video was exactly what i needed to hear when you dropped it but i was too depressed to check my phone. Gread video bruh

[@ProfessorViral]

I'm glad you broke out of the funk a bit, it seems. Hopefully things will look up more and more!

[@toxi6836]

Nice to know my fear of love won’t be met with hostility from everyone. I am not as alone as I thought

[@ProfessorViral]

Of course not, many of us are feeling it in similar ways. All we can do is be honest about it

[@zafiruzoma6234]

Duh

[@thegrimracer8878]

I felt like I was looking in a mirror for the entire second half of this video, you said things that have been in my mind for years, but I was never able to find the words for. Probably the best video I've watched on here

[@AmaknightSAMA]

I love your videos man especially the ones where you connect the concepts back to your life allowing us to connect with them and relate and to understand. Keep up the great work and God bless you.

[@ProfessorViral]

That's always what I'm aiming for, I'm glad it comes across well. Thank you!

[@kisalperera2419]

This is the best analysis of love I have ever listened to man.

[@jettkrome9573]

Love is both the greatest pain and the great part of life. if done right it can cause happiness beyond belif but if done wrong it can cause pain you never knew existed.

[@msroguegoddess1866]

Hey. I think we've All been there. I'm afraid to love too. Since either they love me, but I don't feel those "romantic" feelings. Or I love them and they don't want to commit. Or I just love having friendships and not get to close. Or, I just walk away, disappear, and just let things pass on by... Like, a numbness, you feel nothing at that point, but you want to... But I learn. That Love, Real Love. Is Never forceful, it doesn't fear, it doesn't hurt, it's not jealous, it does not mean attachment. But it cares for you, it listens to you, supports you, respects you, understands your motivations, understands you beliefs, give kindness, gives healing, and love never dies... And I think of Love as a Beautiful friendship, a journey, an experience, a community, and a building foundation. A Union. 😌 Maybe we're a bit cold in the beginning. But we're still learning what True Love. Really means. I'm meeting someone right now, who has All my qualities and we build a great connection. I feared that I couldn't love him back, and even told him 😔 But. He never gave up on me. The things he say, the things he'll do for me, he's Very patient, funny, sweet, and kind. Loves to read, write, and cook, and being a nerd. With a child-like aura around him lol. And something tells me, that I should keep going. Because there's a blessing, and a Great chance for us to be together... Not to Give up 🥲 Sorry in my feels 😅 But I Love your In depth video!!! Definitely A FAN and Subscriber!! Keep it UP🎉🔥✊🏽

[@maplebnuuy]

Hey, I just wanted to say that this hit at the right time for me. I got caught in a bit of a mental spiral and this was just what I needed to get nudged out of it. Thanks for the video.

[@warender8449]

Watching this Video finally made me realise what my true fear is. I fear love because my last 3 relationships i was cheated on abused and even used by each of my partners. This single video made me understand just how i feel about myself because of how you felt about yourself during those times. Thank you for helping me understand myself

[@CinkyTatts]

Feel the same but my parents caused it for me, idk if I can handle something I never really had.

[@krinofrost8027]

After a few terrible relationships this is very relatable thank you

[@-SteampunkTraveler-]

This man needs to blow up, his words are filled with insights! Amazing

[@Derved_]

It's like looking into a mirror the agonizing sensation of regret and pain that hurts so much yet brings you back with promise that it can be better maybe even will get better thank you.

[@Derved_]

sincerely