r/Choosingbeggars Karen: "CLEAN MY HOUSE FOR FREE"

[@silverflight01]

0:07 OP works from home, but there still is a job there. Karen just brushing off OP's priorities because it got in the way of Karen's plans really shows what sort of narcissist Karen is

[@zilesis1]

i really hope the other person contacts OP to get her side of the story as well and/or OP contacts her friends to let them know about the change cause, it's pretty obvious the Karen is already trying to spin the facts in her favour (probably to get a mob going to guilt trip OP into doing what she wants)

[@lorilancaster5917]

@@zilesis1 I have a feeling she did since she already wasn’t buying CB’s story

[@gilded_lady]

@zilesis1 What I want to know is how well the friend that recommended OP knew Karen. Her being skeptical of Karen makes me wonder if their relationship was closer to acquaintance - like friend of a friend that would see each other at group outings or if she knew Karen was prone to being selfish (in which case she's kind of a shitty friend to recommemd OP in the first place)

[@danielbrant6740]

Fake booty for a fake personality? Sure, why not?

[@cynister7384]

@@zilesis1 Well seeing as how OP posted the screenshots, OP's friend probably sent them to OP.

[@Veronica4229]

Oh no the 1st story is ridiculous. I had paid for the hotel and food for my friends while they cared for me after my tummy tuck. They took time out of THEIR schedules to take care of me. After the surgery and then when I got home my mom took care of me and guess what? I paid for groceries and child care. Woman is selfish af.

[@audreym3908]

And that's why you're a better person than the CB.

[@fdm2155]

Yeah, that Karen is also stupid. Did she not realize that big cities are BIG? She apparently assumed OP must live near her doctor's office without actually checking on that or whether the route is a busy one. Who assumes a friend of a friend is not only going to give you a free furnished room for multiple days but also going to act as your driver, cook, nurse and maid? 🤣🤣 Even if OP has no job at all, it doesn't' mean she wants to do all that crap for Karen!

[@wangpasta]

It also gets worse, saw it a while ago. There were 2 more posts. Where CB talks to another friend (2), Friend 2 talks to OP and tells her all the shit CB is saying, friend 1 that introduced CB and OP grovels for forgiveness, Friend 1 then talks to friend 2 and calls her shitty for sending text messages over and calls OP names to protect CB

[@axlengland]

@@wangpasta whoa so then friend 1 was being shitty to OP as well? What is this dumpster fire of friendship? 🫥

[@Nekulturny]

Shes not even getting an actual surgery she needs, its a "booty lift" which is apparently a thing now.

[@gilded_lady]

1st story: a lack of planning on Karen's part is not an emergency on OPs. She should have asked for help first THEN scheduled 2nd.

[@fdm2155]

Yeah, sounds like Karen doesn't understand how cities work. LOL She apparently assumed every place in the city is a few minutes drive from every place else. Also who expects a stranger to give them free room AND board for multiple days, act as their driver and their cook/maid? Oh, and can you take off several hours of PTO over the course of those multiple days on super short notice? 😆

[@abiean222]

OP was super nice too, not only offering room and board, but also OP's car and was willing to drive the karen to and from the surgery. OP is like super generous.

[@JohnGaltShadow]

Plus she’s been planning for forever? Clearly not.

[@silverflight01]

11:28 OP was being helpful to those who were having some difficult times, whether it was loss or having a baby. Those neighbors were nice people. Karen here, was not on difficult times. She was rude to OP and was demanding her to clean the house for free.

[@lorilancaster5917]

And OPs husband has the nerve to side with the Karen? I hope OP gave him a serious talk

[@PinataFreaks]

2nd story: So this guy's marriage is going badly, and he stated the only physical activity his wife does is to "go shopping" (so she doesn't seem to be interested in exercising or fitness). And he thinks giving her an exercise program and a meal plan is going to fix this. Wow.

[@fdm2155]

Well, the husband seems like an idiot so I wouldn't take his word for her activity level. Also, 5ft 6in at 160 pounds isn't obese or anything so not sure why he thought this was a suitable gift for her unless she's expressed an interest in having a plan.

[@velvety2006]

yea every girl dreams,of getting told her guy thinks she is getting fat without telling her he thinks she is getting fat

[@Amayawolf_01]

"I know our relationship is having issues rn, but I wanted to show you how much I love you by giving you this meal and fitness plan so you'll be less fat"

[@abiean222]

didn't he also say she's like 150 pounds? thats like not even that fat. wow, this guy sounds like a real keeper. i wonder if the weight is due to pregnancy too.

[@thesebi]

Yeah.... if she is not interested, this is a terrible present. Also he promised to give her a present, and judging from the texts I guess he tried to get it for free without paying ....

[@francescaperron2003]

Last story: I'm a parrot owner myself. I do completely agree with no children under 8, dogs or cats (since the parrot is out of the cage in the whole house), however I wouldn't trust someone who has no experience. Parrots are not easy animals, and they have sensitive respiratory systems. Bigger ones, such as cockatoos, can also be dangerous if stressed out. Also, because they are difficult animals, $100 for a week is ridiculous

[@jgw5491]

Yeah, but Birdy is a "sweetheart". Being in its presence for a week is an honor and a privilege. Besides you'll never miss that ear it bites off your head while it's whispering sweet nothings. /s That poor bird! (seriously) Left alone with a likely inexperienced stranger for a week! What a crappy guardian! 🦜

[@Arc3752]

Agreed. Plus, parrots can be very destructive when bored or stressed. Leaving a bored parrot alone in an unfamiliar house is a recipe for disaster.

[@francescaperron2003]

@@jgw5491 I know! I would never let some stranger take care of my bird. They need constant attention, clean cage and new water every day. The sad part is that they only get aggressive if they feel like they're in danger, and if someone doesn't know what they are doing the bird could snap. Then it either gets put down or rehomed. I hate people who have pets and don't understand their pets.

[@francescaperron2003]

@@Arc3752 Oh yes. My parrot likes destroying things for attention haha.

[@BeeWhistler]

Yeah, I'd heard that cockatoos especially are a huge responsibility. Very needy birds.

[@soulgazer11]

Like Rslash pointed out, no wonder his marriage is on the rocks. Who tf gives their wife a FITNESS PLAN for christmas??

[@velvety2006]

someone who wants a dumbbell thrown at their heads

[@mariposa9506]

@@velvety2006 wait I thought he was the dumbell?

[@velvety2006]

@@mariposa9506 well he is defiantly dumb lol

[@JohnGaltShadow]

Yeah, that’s worse than giving your wife a vacuum cleaner for Christmas.

[@use0037]

another TST member! cool :)

[@papabear1333]

Story 2: The getaway with her friends is her getting away from that relationship 😂😂😂

[@lifewuzonceezr]

ALL THE Cringe!

[@geekgirl616]

Yeah a weight loss program as a Christmas present?! this guy just must love it when she’s mad what an ass

[@bloodrain6455]

Wonder if she sent back an attorney with divorce papers.

[@annabelfazukimi7902]

I bet the husband was the one who told Karen his wife could clean her house for free and felt embarrassed when, surprise, wifey said no

[@brittanyross9764]

Ooooh it felt like there was something missing from that story. This would make a ton of sense

[@fdm2155]

Oh, that does sound entirely possible. Would certainly explain his ridiculous response. Also if the Karen neighbor was smarter, she'd have asked nicely. How on EARTH did she think being a demanding rude cow was gonna get her any favors? LOL

[@ams197610]

@chewymarissa13 Did they miss the sell part? Why would you make them that for free?

[@dx1450]

If someone treated my wife like that, I'd have high-fived her after she said she told them to F off.

[@curtisalex456]

@@dx1450 Yeah, I kind of feel like the husband does not respect his wife and he thinks that his wife is the neighborhood free maid.

[@Bigdaddyducky]

The lady in the first story says “everything is already paid for” maybe she should have…idk…..Planned everything out earlier than a week from her appointment

[@velvety2006]

or if she has a budget shortage i dunno save a bit longer so she can also afford a nearby hotel

[@BeanManolo]

OP's friend probably told her "I have a friend who lives in that city, maybe she can let you stay on her guest room for a while", but Karen's brain processed it as "Hey gurl, I know someone who can give you boarding, food and transport right next to where you're going to get your booty lifted"; Considering she ignored everything OP said, and only heard "work from home" and ran with "OP is a MLM Boss Babe" from it, won't surprise me if that's how her brain process everything she's told.

[@MiniAngelMom]

As far as the parrot boarder, she was out her mind. As a Parront myself, I paid $1200 for two weeks of boarding when I moved from city to city, and then went to get her last. They are as smart as 5 y.o children and due damage as a wrecking crew, they also need constant care and attention so she needs to get her stuff together and pay accordingly.

[@carlson1740]

I would be one of the idiots who would work for her… I’m just a sucker for parrots

[@lifewuzonceezr]

Story just starting...omg an exotic Bird sitter story you say..this is ...there are for people..there are cat people..AND THEN THERE ARE BIRD PEOPLE

[@lifewuzonceezr]

Also...id take it

[@fdm2155]

The parrot owner should have used something like trusted housesitter to find someone to watch the parrot in their home for the week. Ridiculous expecting someone to board a parrot in their home for less than $10/day.

[@sams.3552]

It is also a TERRIBLE idea to leave a bird with an inexperienced person, especially a cockatoo, who are notoriously difficult to care for

[@HoodieHorizon]

Lmao that 2nd story is hilarious “my marriage is on the rocks so I’m gonna tell my wife she’s fat and needs to lose weight disguised as a gift”

[@velvety2006]

my guess he is gonna get divorce papers for valentine lol

[@abiean222]

a fitness plan would be a shitty gift even if the recipient was a fitness nut, i would think. someone like that would already have a fitness plan and you getting them a new one is like you are saying that they look bad.

[@Lunicia_the_crazy_healer]

@@abiean222 plus, the husband obviously knew nothing about her exercise preferences, meaning the plan wouldn't even a fit for her.

[@xKCAZxLEADER]

First Post: This Karen has no consideration for OP's priorities. Not going to lie, if I was OP I would tell her no for everything after this little exchange. This is a "U need me, I don’t need u" kind if situation. Obviously she is leaving out soooo many details about what has really happened. Just because OP works at home doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a job. Did Karen forget that work from home jobs spawned during the peak of the pandemic? Second Post: Literally every business does this. They don’t send a product before payment. What is this guy going to say? "I promise I’ll pay u on the second"? Nothing will stop him from scamming OP and blocking them from everything. Also, what made this guy think a weight loss plan was a good idea for a Christmas gift 😂🙄 Third Story, NTA: What is OP's husband talking about? This Karen pulled up to OP's house and demanded free cleaning? Hell no. OP cleans the KIND neighbors house as an act of kindness. What she did could’ve possibly ruined it for everyone else and will cause OP to not help anyone else anymore. In fact, if she wants OP to clean her house she can pay OP Fourth Post: So only a $100 for the entire week, during Christmas week, and she wants them to just pet sit a bird? Yeah, good luck with that

[@TomDarkwulf87]

Karen definitely thinks the world revolves around her

[@TerranosaurRex]

for story two, i understand it. their wanting to give a gift before they go, but they can only pay for it on the 2nd of January. i honestly understand that one. but im waiting to see how it finishes up because im not finished with 2 yet

[@undrhil]

Restaurants give you food before you pay. I think that is the only business that does that period and there are hundreds if not thousands of stories of people leaving without paying. Which is a good reason to point to for this story about why op is right for not giving the plan before payment.

[@Ryanthusar]

The moment in that first story that she started showing that she was a wanting little B I would have instantly shut her down and said "I'm sorry, but I'm rescinding my offer, find some other person to help you." then blocked her and contacted the mutual friend/acquaintance and told them everything.

[@RiveroftheWither]

@@TerranosaurRex They SAY they can only pay on the 2nd, which is an extremely common excuse used by people looking to scam free lance workers online. They agree on price, on time, on all details, right up until the work is done and payment is due. Then suddenly they don't have the money and can't get it until after the agreed time, hitting you with a sob story about a dying grandma or failing marriage so you agree. Then they never pay you... and they get away with it because free lance internet work has very VERY little protections unless you require a signed contract you can take to court. The second most common scam is refusing to pay, they accept and agree with everything right up until you give it to them, then suddenly it's awful and they refuse to pay but keep the product. This highlights the benefits of using free lancer hosting sites because they do provide more protections against scammers but not everyone wants to use those for various reasons. Even if he was actually being honest about everything, if your marriage is on the verge of collapse because of a belated Christmas present, the present is NOT the issue nor the solution, especially a fitness and diet plan.

[@justinebidulopoutchini9774]

I love that in the first story, the Karen just says to her friend that she can’t stay with op, when that’s one of the thing OP clearly said she could lol

[@fdm2155]

Yeah, notice how she doesn't lay out all the many demands she had for staying with OP. Clearly Karen knows that was ridiculous. I wouldn't expect my sister to do all that much less a friend of a friend!

[@ultraginge1990]

Yeah…….this was what I was thinking.

[@glennrishton5679]

@@fdm2155 I suspect just the opposite that she viewed all her demands were quite normal and reasonable to expect from a stranger who has agreed to let you stay in their house for a few days. I believe the word would be delusional. To her the demands were as normal as expecting a hotel to have towels and bed linen. I believe OP escaped a bullet, can you imagine this Karen in your house even for a few hours?

[@condorboss3339]

@@glennrishton5679 Oh, yes. I don't think OP would get a moment's peace after that Karen walked through the door. She'd probably start by demanding to sleep in the master bedroom.

[@fdm2155]

@@glennrishton5679 Yes, Karen clearly expected to be treated like an invited and honored guest 🤣 You know she would have complained about EVERYTHING! The room is too small, she doesn't like the decor, why doesn't OP live in a 'better' neighborhood? OMG why aren't they preparing gourmet meals of her favorite dishes? Do you have HBO Max? Can't you get it while I'm here? 😆😆

[@SamanthaMidgleyIsANerd]

IDK about other people but I think there are VERY few situations where I would be grateful to receive a weight loss meal plan from ANYONE lol, unless I had expressly said how badly I wanted one. But considering this guy said his relationship is already rocky, I doubt that communication was there lol

[@ProtonFilms_Mark]

My wife ordered cleaners before new year's. They told us the job would take 300 bucks, which I think is steep for 45 square meters, but okay. They broke a crystal champagne glass which costs 250 bucks (it was a wedding gift, I would never have bought something like that). After they found out how much the glass cost, the job miraculously cost 550 bucks and they graciously offered to discount the 250. My wife got an earful from me for not having a contract to sign with them.

[@lifewuzonceezr]

The price was probably based off of your wife's requests ie everything. Hopefully it was insured. I would have A contract and My greatest thing of value is my TV? OH...nope I own ivory! I need to have that looked at!

[@jkissinger2]

6 and a half bucks per square meter doesn't seem that bad. I do agree that a contract or some sort of receipt should've been in place though. I hope you were able to get the glass replaced by them.

[@fdm2155]

@@jkissinger2 Yes, even an email laying out the expected terms would have sufficed.

[@analyticalchick3064]

It's better to hire an individual so you don't have a rate based on overhead costs.

[@brockwiththepot]

Should have just gave them fifty and told them to sue.

[@fir-endflames]

small chance u are going to see this, but thank you for making my days just a little less lonely, rslash. i couldn’t put it into words how much i really do appreciate you even if i tried. i hope you’re having a good day my man !!

[@DPWFG]

Marriage is on the rocks Forgets to get wife Christmas gift Gets wife a late, last-minute gift of a weight loss plan Can't even pay for it Haiku: Marriage on the rocks Forgotten Christmas present Weight loss gift, can't pay

[@abiean222]

can't pay $50. wow, just wow with this guy

[@ahmedsameh6372]

could have been a haiku

[@nanwijanarko1969]

Appreciate the Haiku

[@bellahontas510]

If anyone cares, a "mommy makeover" is a specific combination of surgeries that are usually done all the same day, and they can be brutal. Typically, it's a combo of liposuction, tummy tuck, breast lift, and/or "booty lift" procedures. Some surgeons' offices include cool sculpting (non-invasive fat removal, usually in the face or throat/neck) or injections of face freezers/fillers.

[@Royalname31]

Why do it all in the same day? Even with all the money and accomodations in place, I feel going through all that pain is not worth it

[@velvety2006]

@@Royalname31 I think the point is that you are done in one go so you don't need to come back multiple times and have multiple anesthetics, some people can't afford to take all that time off. plus with multiple anesthetics and recovery, there will be weeks between each operation. that means multiple times being in pain and needing to be cared for.

[@kellis6645]

@@Royalname31 I have a feeling it's so you can have the "suddenly transformed" moment and everyone's minds are blown when you get to walk into the room with everything done up. Surgeries? Me? No Hun, you have to get on this amazing post partum exercise plan I've been grinding!

[@bellahontas510]

@@velvety2006 you pretty much nailed it

[@velvety2006]

@@bellahontas510 just to be clear I did not have a mommy make-over XD I have had a double Achilles heel correction operation twice and the basics were the same. have both done at the same time so I did not have the operation and recovery twice lol

[@JadeAnnabelArt]

As someone who owns a bird, and is familiar with big birds. Big birds NEED to have someone they're familiar (And like) with to petsit. They bond, and if they don't like whoever Karen chooses to petsit (If she has any takers at all) it will be a literal nightmare for the poor petsitter. A good example is MrMaxTV, he's a cockatoo channel. The original owner bought Max, then left for several weeks while the now owner petsit. Since literally JUST got Max, Max bonded with the petsitter instead. Now, if the petsitter needs to go away for extended periods of time, he has specific people to take care of Max, family members that Max knows and likes. It's a big responsibility.

[@wolfywox]

Last CB: No parrot experience required! Also last CB: If you're not familiar with parrot body language you're gonna get bit 🙂

[@JohnSmith-xq1pz]

First story 🤣🤣🤣 who needs enemies when you have a friend who has a friend like that lol

[@corruptsoul3]

I saw the first story play out on reddit and I wondered if it would end up here. Good to know I was right. edit: There is more to this story. OP and her friend communicate about the choosing beggar.

[@dracko158]

Karen: "OP works from home, she doesn't even have a real job!" Also Karen: **Wants to get a surgery for a fake butt**

[@aiyana02]

nice job copying rslash's joke💀

[@dracko158]

@@aiyana02 Copied it...? I didn't? Bro, it's not like I copied it word for word.

[@TsukiKageTora]

@@aiyana02 nice job in assuming. I actually pause things to comment what I’m wanting to comment, so sometimes I comment what the person in the video says after I unpause the video.

[@aiyana02]

@@TsukiKageTora cope

[@TsukiKageTora]

@@aiyana02 cope? You’re the one complaining how someone is copying a KZbinr in the comments, where you could ignore it, so the one needing to cope is you

[@drawingwitch1661]

Jesus Christ the first woman is so entitled

[@lancerevell5979]

And a major choosing beggar! 🙄

[@flazzorb]

And a liar, she told OP the surgery was planned _before_ talking to them. She then told the friend the surgery was planned _after_ talking to OP.

[@RobPryme]

Story 1: Your lack of planning doesn't necessitate an imposition on me.

[@TsukiKageTora]

I would feel so bad if I was the friend that accidentally sent a raging choosing beggar brat onto my friend like that. I would never be able to apologize enough

[@roachmorphine8018]

Ok but honestly, I would love to babysit the cockatoo. As long as she doesn't scream constantly 😂

[@captainshiloh831]

rslash videos are the only consistent part of my day and i’m so glad for them. hope you’re having a great day, rslash!!!!

[@somaplay]

yeah for me too, I always look forward the time he posts (its 3 pm for me, so around the end of the workday)

[@captainshiloh831]

@@somaplay it’s at 8am for me, so i’m always happy to watch it before the hell that is school

[@asianpersuasion-station6544]

@@captainshiloh831 yepperino! I always look forward to my 9am rslash!

[@somaplay]

@@captainshiloh831 at least you have something to look forward in the morning lol. I love how worldwide rslash is and people all over the world makes to fit the daily episode into thier routine.

[@Martynde]

"please have faith [in me]" - people who should not be trusted

[@ProudAuntieEST2016]

The Parrot story: I do pet sitting at 10 bucks a day per non caged pet with a 2-night minimum and I've done it for 10 years, but I also stayed in the clients home not in my own with the animals. That would make me charge more. Most of my clients are very low income and or single parent families with referrals for others that don't meet those criteria. Most of the time they'll give me more than that but really it pays for my transportation and food while I am staying there. I did a lot of sitting for family when I was first starting out and it if was over a holiday, I was given extra not because of the holiday but because transportation issues arise during holidays for me. The animals are a lot more comfortable in their own home. One of my client families has 3 small dogs and a rabbit and when I told the owner I was moving back after 2 years away she got really excited and booked me for a week for this summer. (I haven't even flown back yet.) The owner missed me while I was away because I took such great care of the animals including the rabbit which I had no experience taking care of before this family. What they are asking is ridiculous.

[@MsTemptation]

Good for you but that’s your choice. I’m guessing that you probably couch surf so that’s why accepting the bare minimum works out for you.

[@fdm2155]

Well, this sounds essentially like housesitting/petsitting that people find through sites. Typically no money is exchanged sitter agrees to mind the pet/plants in exchange for staying in the home could be a weekend could be months. I think that's what this person should have done. Used a site to find a verified pet sitter who was willing to stay in their home for free. Then tip them if you're happy with the job they did.

[@ProudAuntieEST2016]

@Ms Temptation No, I don't couch surf, actually. I did grow up as the child of a struggling single parent, though. I saw a need and did what I could to help people in my community because I had the time to do it between work and school. It's rude to assume that just because I would do something nice like this , I did it because I couch surf. There is nothing wrong with couch surfing when you are struggling it's asking for help when you know you need it. I've actually provided a couch for others to surf on, too. It's just filling a need after first hand seeing the struggle.

[@ProudAuntieEST2016]

@FDM 215 Yeah, at least then someone would be more willing and probably have more experience with a parrot. I've never personally been much of a bird person myself, but my best friend is and has taught me over the years about some of her favorite birds.

[@fdm2155]

@@ProudAuntieEST2016 They don't call it 'couch surfing' but the housesitting/pet sitting site I mentioned is essentially this. It encourages people to swap their time to care for pets or plants or homes in exchange for a free place to stay. Typically people use it because they want to visit a particular location and are looking to save on accommodation while home owners want their pets comfortable at home and to avoid expensive boarding options. I think it's a great idea and am hoping to pet sit when I visit London later this year! It would save me a couple of thousand dollars on accommodations.

[@Villiawenn]

As a parrot owner, 100 dollars is nothing. Parrots can be extremely difficult to deal with, they are loud, messy and destructive. They are sometimes worse than small kids, you need to keep an eye on them non stop, especially outside the cage. Also, you cannot just let them fly free in the place they doesn't know and with people they doesn't know, that's safety hazard for everyone involved. Even in known space they can easily get hurt (like my parrot who managed to turn on stove few times already, chewed on cables and almost hang up on toy).

[@velvety2006]

That reminds me of a budgie my grandma had, he would always kamikaze my older brother for some reason and he was terrified of him lol.

[@Martynde]

The Karen booked the operation for several days without considering where she was going to stay and how she was going to travel,

[@PlasticBluVentRabbit]

The audacity to go to someone else’s house, knock their door forever, and then have the gall to not only demand they clean your dirty ass house for free, but to also get upset when they don’t immediately say yes OP, you said Florida and it all makes sense. Also hubby needs to zip it or go clean that house himself. Be nicer indeed.

[@demondogmom7221]

I wish she lived near me, I'd pay her to clean.. and be grateful. Her husband is the AH for volunteering her.

[@Sarika38]

Unless Hubby is boinking the b****….he sounds like the POS I was married to for 23 years!

[@xLostInFirex]

As a parrot owner, getting a low-paid and unexperienced person to look after your parrot would be a disaster. There's literally so many things that are toxic to parrots that the usual person wouldn't probably think of, such as teflon pans, any unnatural cleaning supplies, many plants, lots of foods, cooking, airfriers, airfresheners, the list goes on and on... And they get stressed from the tiniest things and can drop dead on the stop from a heart attack. So possibly no parties, guests, loud music... No open windows for sure. They can also bite and a bigger birb can affect some serious injuries when it's stressed out and the person is unexperienced, would OP pay for that? Would OP be sure that the rando wouldn't hurt the birb if it bit them, or just sue OP? Would OP pay for the damaged furniture that's probably gonna happen if the birb is big and stressed or bored? I'd probably die from anxiety if I left my birbs with a random unexperienced and low-paid stranger. I think that OP is rather just clueless than an (intentional) choosing beggar tho. To us birb owners the birbs are indeed a delight and it might sound like easy money when you know how to take care of the birb and make sure it's safe, but to a random, unexperienced person...

[@chevgage6210]

The only people willing to pet sit under those conditions are the type of people who will turn around and sell that bird instead

[@confettiveda2460]

See you know a Karen is definitely in the wrong when they feel the need to blatantly lie to get people on their side.

[@Camilla550]

If one of our neighbours spoke to me like that I can guarantee my husband’s reaction WOULD NOT be to tell me to be nicer to them! 😂 Also, I remember hearing a story similar to the house cleaning one. OP’s husband used mow their neighbour’s front garden along with their own because it was joined (semi-detached house), the neighbour never once said thank you or acknowledged this but the husband did it because he was a very kind person. Then one day he was in a nasty car accident and broke both his legs along with getting a major concussion. He was going to be alright just needed some major rest and time to recover. A few weeks went by and one day someone knocked very loudly at the front door and it was the neighbour. She was _demanding_ to know why her front lawn hadn’t been mowed in so long and was complaining about how long the grass had gotten. OP explained about the car accident so the neighbour had the audacity to demand OP to mow her lawn instead and even said they had to mow her back garden too as it wasn’t fair they only did the front. She didn’t ask if the husband was ok and obviously didn’t care about his wellbeing as the only thing she cared about was getting lawn mowed for free. When OP refused the neighbour then demanded they hire someone to mow her lawn until the husband was well enough to do it again. OP told the neighbour to f*** off and they stopped mowing her side of the lawn altogether so the neighbour had to do it herself then 😂

[@lillyvonshtup7314]

My friend had a parrot.. he destroyed about $2000 worth of custom wooden blinds in about an hour … and shit on them too

[@karol12130]

The poop is the best part of it. Like a cherry on top 😹

[@randallparr680]

I learned not to trust doorbell buttons during my delivery boy days. My experience was that they are sometimes old and not working and despite what you see on TV, I consider it rude to knock AND ring. I could not always hear the doorbell from the stoop so I my habit was to always knock. In my retirement, my job was to photograph homes for insurance purposes. So even when I saw a Ring doorbell, I still knocked because of the motion sensor feature (even then nobody ever spoke to me through the Ring). Not one person ever told me knocking was rude.

[@justaperson4656]

"Babysit a rose breasted cockatoo" "No experience needed" NOPE NOPE NOPE! THAT BIRD ISN'T EVEN POTTY TRAINED BUT COCKATOOS ARE HIGH MAINTENANCE

[@justinmyers9515]

If you get your wife and exercise regiment for her a present you will get a divorce.

[@CrookiNari]

Parrot story: Galahs are pretty big and can scream quite loud. If you're not careful their bites can be severe. You can't just have someone who doesn't know anything about looking after birds babysit a cockatoo of all things.

[@taylorslade961]

Story 1: Karen is gonna be real mad at all the money spent on the BBL when that look is on its way out.

[@mariemcgee]

Story 2,that dude wanted to ruin her time away by calling her fat indirectly.

[@Aquariun9iteMMare]

The Parrot Mom, at the end, is going to end up paying some high-school kid to party at her house with a few close friends.

[@aaronthepianoman8297]

Nothing like listening to rSlash while playing some terraria. I really appreciate your work searching through hundreds of stories trying to find the gems among them, and then reading them with incredible voices and no background noise, aside from the puppybloopers at least. Thanks rSlash!

[@nikonarshe9296]

"I got you a present babe! It's going to fix our relationship" "Oh what did you get me?" "A fitness plan so you can finally lose weight."

[@Hybrid301]

"My marriage is at stake! I need to fix it by finding the most passive aggressive way to tell my wife to lose weight!"

[@faeriefire78]

Fitness plan a-hole: I was thinking exactly what you said, but also it sounds like he was pulling some kind of passive-aggressive crap by fat shaming her as she's leaving for a girls trip without him.

[@Purpleshade29]

Brazilian butt lifts are extremely risky, risk of blood clots and infection are too high sad some women don't do research

[@lancerevell5979]

So..... going for the Kardashian look?

[@utej.k.bemsel4777]

I'm from Germany, we call her Kard-arsch-ian....

[@AzulaFarum]

As a bird owner, I know how insane taking care of a bird is. OP forgot to mention that birds tend to destroy things because they interact with the world through their beaks. If they can shred it, they will.

[@bland9876]

All that guy has to do is show his wife that he is in the process of buying her the present and that can be good enough. My dad did that once he bought something and then they had to delay the shipment until later so he gave my sister the receipt for it proving that he purchased it.

[@songbird-wj4yj]

As someone who owns birds (granted, they are parakeets, not cockatoos), most of the asks in the post make sense. Cockatoos need a lot of interaction and out of cage time. You never really know how they will get along with dogs and cats, but it can be stressful at the least and deadly at the worst. The most unreasonable thing here is the payment. I already have a decent knowledge of what a cockatoo would require and love birds in general, but you would have to pay WAY more to get someone to watch your bird. Especially because they can be loud, destructive, and very needy. Imagine a 2 year old child who can fly and has a powerful bite.

[@mariposa9506]

If your marriage is in a bad place, maybe don't get her a weight loss plan for Christmas 🤣

[@bonniehalf-elven]

My dad used to raise turkeys. They have smallish droppings, but I can verify that ALL bird poop stinks, if there is enough of it.

[@mr.scarlo2234]

I hope that everyone is having a good Monday!

[@lauracatha3625]

Thank you. Hope you have a great day.

[@JohnSmith-xq1pz]

Nope already a bad Monday sigh

[@themaninblue8393]

The ice on the road melted and now i have to go to school, so not the best, but i hope you have a good day aswell.

[@metabog9212]

No you don’t

[@themaninblue8393]

@@metabog9212 oh yeah, you totally decide what other people’s personal feelings.

[@qdllc]

I have some sympathy for the last one. The cost to board a pet when you have to go out of town is insane. Individuals need to make more, but a lot of places that are cheaper because of economies of scale might not take decent care of your pets.

[@RealCoolstriker64]

Free cleaning lady should be nice, and offer *HER HUSBAND’S* services the next time she asks.

[@Mewse1203]

Maybe it's just me, but getting your wife a meal/exercise plan without previous discussion could go VERY badly. It's rather insulting, honestly. But I guess it depends And I have a sneaking feeling his wife isn't going to like it. Esit: it was already late 😂🤣

[@darkdemondevil]

If your mental health is so poorly that you feel the only fix is a BBL....I feel bad for you and you need help.

[@xxoxEMxoxx]

As someone who can’t drive it’s not other people’s job to accommodate us. It’s nice and appreciated but never expected- especially for a BBL.

[@Aideen]

As a parrot owner of two, I really sympathize with the request in story 4, and I would gladly do it for that price but I understand the perspective of people who wouldn't. Although.. I think it's cause I'm biased towards my feathery friends. Also I'm in college and need money. LOL

[@thatmouldyavocado9868]

Yea but the warning sign is that op said “no experience needed” cockatoos need ALOT of experience, it’s not fair on the poor baby to be dumped on some stranger for a week especially some stranger w no clue.

[@Aideen]

@@thatmouldyavocado9868 That is a very huge concern, yes.. Reading a birds body language is crucial and can take years to fully understand. Birds are extremely emotional creatures, and dumping the poor baby on a stranger can cause them a fatal amount of stress and even depression.. Especially in a new environment.

[@sylphsarigo1996]

I would birdsit a bird like that for that price, but I'm paranoid about birdsitting expensive birds when I'm not good friends with the owner. I worry that if the bird died under my care I could get sued and end up spending thousands. Not sure that's how the law works but I'd rather not risk it.

[@Aideen]

@@sylphsarigo1996 Yeah..

[@metademetra]

On the final story, I think parrots are the pet that's in between the "needs a lot of extra work" and "needs a lot of extra work and can potentially kill you" tiers of pet difficulty. They're incredibly intelligent, need A LOT of social interaction, shit everywhere, and on top of everything, they have beaks that are basically organic cigar clippers. One of my SO's coworkers lost a tip of a finger because he was trying to trim a parrot's nails, and the parrot freaked out and bit him. You bet your ass that if I'm watching a parrot for the entirety of my Christmas vacation, sacrificing my time away from family and putting my digit safety at risk, I'm asking for $800 minimum.

[@gaveintothedarkness]

1st story does have an update - basically OP told the friend their place is no longer on the table, the Karen misunstood the friend and the friend never promised anything crazy. OP and her friend are still on good terms.

[@lauramarika]

Hope BBL Karen got her research right. BBL rarely turns out okay...

[@lancerevell5979]

"Big Boob Lifting"?

[@Viol3ntlySpicy]

Yeah, immediately when I heard BBL I tensed. It's got the highest mortality rate in all of cosmetic surgery due to the super high chance of the fat being injected into the butt travling inside the blood vessels then travelling to the heart. It causes the heart to immediately stop. Not even to mention the recovery, which for a surgery down there has a higher chance of infection.

[@MaggieGosia]

Story 3: I guess next time instead of saying just F-off, she should say F-off *please* in order to be "nicer" lol

[@ruffr4bb1t]

Reminder to vet all your house / animal caretakers. I don’t even let randoms babysit my lizard and he doesn’t even need interaction like a parrot would.

[@leelemonbee]

LMAO to the bird lady! I have stopped pet sitting because we moved into a smaller apartment, but I absolutely would be asking about $100 a night if it was going to poop everywhere. Wowza

[@richarderickson8840]

House cleaning story. Just goes to show that no good deed will go unpunished. Where do these absolute tools come from? I have not been subjected to a Karen YET, but since I wrote that I am sure Karma will get me.

[@tonyhaynes9080]

That first parasite sounds like a carbon copy of Michelle McNaire who used to live in Newquay Cornwall, England. Expects everybody to drop everything they are doing to accommodate her wishes at the drop of the hat.

[@Silverserri]

Pet Boarding: 1) birds DO NOT like changes to their environment. It causes them a lot of stress. Every parrot I've owned had to get used to a vacuum cleaner. Some never did, and they climb to the farthest part of their cage and huddle there till it's done, making distressed noises despite our best attempts to train them that it's okay. . Moving Furniture around to clean under it stressed the bird. And every bird FREAKED OUT when we rearranged the living room to put up the Christmas tree. It took them days of screaming, agitated movements, and racing around before realizing that the Christmas tree didn't eat them in their sleep. Putting your bird in a completely new environment to fly around freely in would not make them happy. 2) large parrots are DESTRUCTIVE. They chew/destroy anything they can get their beaks on. We're talking furniture, window sills, baseboards, door jams. Google what a parrot can do to your house unless supervised 100% of the time they are out of their cage. 3) that kind of pay for a large parrot is insulting. They often need special care, a LOT of supervision, and socializing time, as well as a particular diet that may involve fresh fruits, nuts, and other dietary needs. Unless OP is providing a refrigerator full of fresh produce, the boarder will have to do a grocery run for that bird (seed/pellet diet is NOT healthy or enough for the bird's needs. 4) Large parrots are very smart (in the animal world) and mischief makers. Imagine if you will, a toddler who can fly, bites hard enough to sever your finger clean off, and can utterly destroy wooden objects in a matter of minutes. Worse, you are a stranger so the bird is unlikely to bond well and snuggle with you, and they are in a strange environment where they are stressed out, missing their human, and in desperate need of stress relief. This parrot lady is insane, and stupid and should not have a parrot at all.

[@darthmadeus]

1st story: I would have texted back, "Use your thinking brain to figure it out."

[@alilouise5756]

I'd actually take care of the cockatoo for that, but I do love birds. Such a shame that I have a 2 year old. So sad, no birdie babysitting for me :(

[@rebeccajesse4604]

Parrot story - the price is the least wrong thing about that post! A cockatoo is a big bird that can cause an adult human serious bodily harm. CB says that you don't need experience?! Yes, you do! How else would you be able to read bird body language to be able to tell that it's about to take off one of your fingers?! Not to mention, you would need to know that you can't cook with teflon pans, have ceiling fans, open doors often, or use strong-smelling chemical cleaners. Birds are not easy to care for, common household things can kill them very quickly. Not to mention, if a person has no cats/dogs ok, other pets can still be a huge issue, especially if the bird won't be in a cage. Rats can kill a bird through the bars of their own cage if it gets too close. Gosh, there are just so many red flags!

[@Giganotus]

Ok the cockatoo one actually seemed reasonable until the pay came up. The requirements seemed demanding to those unfamiliar with large parrots, but cockatoos really do NEED a lot of attention and care. They're extremely demanding animals. Which is why the pay was so abysmal. If you want someone to watch such a high demand animal you're gonna need to pay a lot more than $100

[@rebeccajesse4604]

lol for me the pay wasn't the worst part. It was the "no experience needed" I mean that is a recipe for a dead bird and an expensive ER visit for the human. Also, they didn't mention the space/house requirements that would be needed = "no cooking with teflon, no candles or scent emitters, no ceiling fans, doors/cupboards that close safely and securely, no small items left out that could be eaten, nothing hanging from the ceiling" and many other things that can quickly kill or injure a bird. Plus no experience reading bird body language usually ends up with a bite or scratch, and with the larger parrots that usually needs a trip to the ER/Urgent care.

[@Mewse1203]

Rslash took the words right put of my brain. She wasn't saving any money. She was just trying to have OP spend, so she didn't have to.

[@theplaintech]

Does the parrot bite? Will I bleed? Also, parrot will have to get along with my cat. He's a sweetie. He loves birds. It will be a perfect fit. And the good news is that if something happens, you won't have to have someone take care of that pesky bird any more. Will pay for pretty feathers. You will have to take care of burial.

[@demondogmom7221]

Cab...Uber... After the first text of the demands, it would be a HARD no. No to the driving. No to the food. No to the guest room. No to ever speaking to this woman ever again.

[@jeanninelynn9622]

Lmaooo at the comment about the husband’s idea of a good gift to his wife. I was thinking the same thing😂😂😂

[@willSugar]

That first story is just crazy to me because I would never just hand out a room in my home and a car to someone I've never met before. Op is a nice person, too nice for their own good.

[@AJGecko18]

Me, an animal lover: 100 bucks to hangout with a bird?? YES. I love birds

[@metalqueen237]

Wow the guy from the fitness plan story is dumb & shallow. Aside from everything, he was also planning on surprising his wife w/ a fitness plan that she obviously didn't ask for. Not to mention, 5'4 & 160 lbs isn't too terribly overweight. Like maybe she has some pudge, but it's nothing severe enough that her health is at serious risk. I'm 5'2 & 140 lbs. I have a bit of chonk that I'm working on losing, but thats my choice & only my choice. If my bf surprised me w/ a fitness plan, let alone as a late Xmas present, I'd be deeply hurt by that. My bf knows weight & body image are sensitive topics for me & hes nothing but supportive. This guy tho doesn't sound like he knows much of anything about his wife. I hope she divorces him & goes on to live her best life

[@maggpiprime954]

I'm really hoping for an update convo between OP and CB's friend where the whole thing is cleared up/CB exposed (I mean, it kinda was, if OP got screenshots from their friend that they could post, now that I think on it).

[@MjaoZor]

ill take that fitness and meal plan for 50 bucks...

[@cassieosbourne7666]

“My marriage is in a tough spot so I’m going to give my wife something that implies that I think she’s fat”

[@dutchvanderbilt9969]

So people are allowed to be rude to your wife but your wife can't be rude back? What kind of sense does that make?

[@ScooterBond1970]

I really like dude's reasoning of "well you already made it so why can't you just give it to me?" By that logic he should be able to walk into any store and yoink the products off the shelf because they're already made.

[@boisegameshowguy]

On a scale of "LOL" to "WTF" on the Karenomics scale, r/choosingbeggars stories are pretty much a "BLOODY HELL!!!" They're infuriating and hilarious to me at the same time.

[@the_unknow_n2032]

My friends looove to tell me to f--- off so I once asked hey~ when are you going to introduce me to your new friend off? The look of shock they give me 😂😂😂

[@Nekulturny]

This first one I can't believe let this conversation go on this long. I would have told em the first time they started complaining they were no longer welcome.

[@smorphous8928]

First post: this Karen is so ungrateful that Op is allowing her to stay at their house lol.

[@gabrielaubry1334]

Story 2 : What kind of guy gives a fitness plan to his wife for Christmas? Sounds like a backhanded gift, if you asked me.

[@SuperSenshi]

(13:24) "...he said that I shouldn't have talked to her like and next time I should be nicer." I agree, you should have said "Please fuck off." It's polite, after all. XD

[@raarasunai4896]

Ahh, Rslash, right on schedule. The best way to start the day

[@wisteria8030]

its 2pm bro the day has not just started lolol

[@natashaaston1328]

Yeah because it's 2 everwhere. Also night workers and stuff

[@luvdisneyv]

This subreddit reminds me what the Joker once said "If your good at something don't do it for free"

[@uhohspaghettios3801]

Pet sitting is one thing that I would gladly pay extra for. In fact, someone being willing to watch my exotic pet for only $15 a day is a red flag to me, like, they're either going to kidnap my pet or do a terrible job caring for them

[@lyndora33864]

Maybe because I've experienced it with people in my life, but I have no respect for people who make it all the way into adulthood who don't drive and expect other people to taxi cab them around for free. Seriously, if you want to go places and do things, either pay for the cab or Uber or public transportation OR get your own d*** driver's license. I know it may be harder for some people to go through the necessary steps to get their license, but that's what public transportation is for. If a person is "too good" for public transportation and refuses to drive, I guess they are screwed then.

[@vykepp5709]

If your relationship is gonna fail because you cant get your partner a weight loss problem (when her estimated weight wasnt concerning), that relationship was doomed to fail for a long time

[@FurFeathersAndScales]

Parrot story: I cannot stress enough-- not paying an exotic pet sitter enough is a safety hazard to the pet(s). If you MUST leave (special pets take sacrifice-- I haven't been on vacation in my adult life lol) pay the crap out of people so they take the job seriously. I have read too many frantic posts of people returning home to dead or dying exotic pets because people doing it for cheap/free just didn't fill their water dishes. It happens a horrifying amount of time. Pay them enough they feel obligated.