Reacting to Pics From When I Lost It a Lil' Bit

Click here bit.ly/3ZCv4cz to take the quiz and use my code PIXIE50 for 50% off your first order! :o)
Care/of works hard to recommend supplements based on scientific research and your personal goals. As a friendly reminder, supplements aren’t intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
🌈 If you'd like to help support us and the channel, you can take a peek at our Patreon here! / pixielocks
💕 Thank u my sweet angel Glitter Patrons!!
4stro, Abigail Stevenson, Abraham Atess, Addie McElreath, Adra Sagr, August, Andy Légasse, Ashlea, Ashton, Alex Pietinen, Alaina Schaffner, Allison Light, Alyssa Wheeler, Amanda Ahrens, Amanda M Gilmour, Ambar Perez, Amber Bunni, Amber Redford, Angel Williams, Anna Marie, Ash's Adventures, August, Ava Marie, Silas Ode, Bannarchist, Bec, Becki, Bea Heidman, Bee, Breanna Gibreal, Brooke Blumenstock, Bunny V, Buttercup N, Calista Frost, Camie, Camille Weeks, Caroline, Caroline Cordaro, Caroline Gaston, Cas Rooney, Cass, Cas Violet, Cat, Catherine D, Cecilia S, Cindy, Charlie, Charlie Irae, Charlotte, Cherii, Chloe A Moffet, Christi-Anne, ChronicIdol, ClockworkQueer, Cor Taylor, Cosmic Pink, Courtney, Crow, Christin Carlano, Chubby Bunny, Courtney, Daisy, Daea Anton, Courtney Fretwell, Dani Snow, Dee S, Dizzy, Doedle, Echo Urban, Eddie, Elise Smith, Elliott Wathne, Émylie Héneault, Emily Lavender, Emily Maree Garrett, Em (Subaru), Ellie, Erica Halliday, Etc System, Evabee, Excaloser, faerie, Fiona Sundaes, Georgie, georgia saul, gingertortoise, Hallie Lands, Hannah Lise, Hanne Marte Ramsli, Hobbes, Holly Boudicca Cannon, IrisIrae, Jahnny Vomit, Jana Cordero, Jasny J, Jasper Huber, Jemma Hart, Jennifer Wardle, Jesse, Jessica Clause, Jessica Davis, Jessica Turner, jolly roger, Jordan Risch, Jorinde Lebeda, Juliana Egge, Kait Hull, Karley Page, Kayla Rice, Kawaii Fluffy Jo, Kelsey Albright, Keito Gasai (Katy Davidovich), Kiah Leo, Kristian Petillo, Kristine Diana Tsiknaki, Krystal Halford, Kt, Laura!, Lauren, Lauren L, Lauren O'Neill, Lava, Leo Munck, Leon Walsh, Lilli Grubb, Lily Atwood, Lily Pine, Lion, Lucy Simkins, LoaBunny, LocalCanadian, Local Familiar, Louis, Lyris, Mae, Madison Jones, Mahou.Club, Maia Roderick, MagicalGirl Obsess, Mark, Marshmallow Faerie, Mathilde McInnes, Max May, Megs, Melissa Baldwin, Mikaela Forrester, Mikaela Given, Miranda Johnston, Miranda Moonstar, Miri, Mipha, Molly Kent, Naru, Moon Prince Cade, Natalia Moroz, Nebutea, Nekob4by, Nerdy Thrift, Nneka Onwuta, Noa Smashy-Smash, NoxMelodia, Olive Mars, Perotine (Bunny) Boileur, Pink Sugar Darling, PixxieStixx, Poppy Clare, Puck Castle, PurpleLulleen, Rae S, rainb0wfaerie, Raine, Rebecca Power, Riley Tishma, Rosalie x, Robyn Muise, Sachi the Cat, Saribel Atencio, Serena, Sierra, Sierra Krug, Skelemaple, Shadrack Corfixen, Shalice Mathis, She-Love Cleopatra, Sofia Kallestrup Perersen, Sabrina Howes, Sam, Snail Farmer, Sonya, Soft Goblin, Sophie Bates, Sora Trancy, Stan Marsh, StariaDream, Sugar Bones, Susanna Kemerling, Taylor de Victoria, Taylor V, Tea Fawn, The GreyS, Tillan Edwards, Unifae, Valerie Nietsche, vanilla, VERA, Virginia Mayhem, Violet, Vixen, Wednesday, Yolanda Robson, and Yuki-kairi 💕
🌈 PIXIELINKS:
Tiktok: / pixieelocks
Twitter: / pixieeelocks
Instagram: / pixieelocks
Facebook: / pixielockss

[@Pixielocks]

Click here bit.ly/3ZCv4cz to take the quiz and use my code PIXIE50 for 50% off your first order! Care/of has been a luvly addition to our daily routine and I know you will love it too :)

[@SpookyStag2015]

i actually think it's really cool that you're talking about mental health decline honestly. why SHOULD there be any shame in saying "yeah, i had a breakdown;" "yeah i kinda lost it for a while there;" 'yeah i relapsed." having periods where your mental health is in decline or fluctuating is simply part of being mentally ill/neurodivergent. recovery is not a constant upward trajectory, it's a rollercoaster that has ups, downs, and loops, and there's no shame in that. i hope we can one day enter a period in our culture where someone can say that their mental health isn't "on the up," so to speak, without them having any shame in it or people treating them as though they're a "Bad" mentally ill person for it. thank you guys!

[@Pixielocks]

Aw thank you so so so much for this comment 😭💗🌈🫶🏻💕

[@mallomiyao]

“i was trying to combine villainy and pixie and it turned into bowser” is honestly kind of iconic lmao

[@Lexi-sb5xt]

I remember when the full drag "phase" started and thinking it felt out of character for you, but figured it would make sense eventually. I love seeing you address this change and the health challenges you went through. 💖💖 I'm glad to see your pastel side again.😍

[@MaybeCristi]

Sameee i missed the "old pixie" back then but yes it makes sense now!

[@cupcakecarolina]

💯 agree

[@misscrackwood]

I felt exactly like you, and when she got her diagnosis, it did make a lot of sense! Life, what a journey!

[@colorbar.s]

I had to stop watching then after being a huge fan for years... I don't think I'm up for this either but it's nice to see pixie doing well. she'll always be a big part of my teen years and the content that had a part in shaping me as a person :)

[@dannikat7780]

Seeing you have so much love for the seasons of your life is so beautiful, and trying to be kind even though the perspective has changed is amazing.

[@Pixielocks]

Awe 😭💗🫶🏻

[@emmawatkins6990]

There are going to be many versions of “you” throughout your life. We’ll support you through your healing journey ❤

[@Rainiepie]

I'm sorry, there's a lot of loveliness in this video that I could respond in a sincere, heartfelt way... but I gotta say at the end there, "They say you can't see mental illness because it's on the inside but I er, feel like I made it very visible on the outside" is such a banger of a line oh, my god, I actually screeched irl. iconic

[@graveyardpansy]

as someone who also thinks about makeup and identity and selfhood and presentation a lot (in a queer and autistic and trans way) i very much appreciate your candor and vulnerability abt all this and now i also wanna make a video discussing my own multitude of identity and makeup and presentation thoughts 😌🖤

[@BrigidNotBrigit]

This video was painfully relatable as someone also going through a trauma-healing journey. I appreciate your vulnerability, it's nice to know I'm not alone! It's crazy to be able to look back on the past and see how much healing has happened. I love doing this reflection myself to see how much better I'm doing, since it's hard to notice it day to day. So thanks for reminding to do this :) Things are getting better :):):)

[@Pixielocks]

Aw thank you for the wonderful comment 🥺🫶🏻💗💕🌈🍀✨

[@giovannacampagna5540]

I think it’s great that you are explaining yourself and your experience because I do understand what you are saying sometimes I feel the same and thinking too deep about it just makes the whole world seem fake and unrecognizable I love you pixie 🧚🏻‍♀️

[@Pixielocks]

You get it!!! Thank you so much 🥺💕🌈🫶🏻✨

[@creepycrawlie]

i unsubscribed during that era bc i was Not here for that and i could tell you were just not having a good time and i wasn’t either so i didn’t want to watch someone else struggle, i’m glad to see you’re in a better place now

[@aday-su5om]

The art of fashion and makeup is just like other art - you experiment, try different things, and sometimes you look back on what you made and cringe/laugh lol. But it’s all still part of the process of growing 💕

[@tenderbri888]

i definitely notice a personal trend myself that my makeup tends to be more colorful and quirky when my mental health is in a bad spot--at that point it does sorta become like a disguise that I ~need~ in order to step out of my house rather than fun self-expression not to say that it's a bad thing, makeup is a wonderful tool to cope during tough times!

[@CommonSandpiper]

Pixie transforms like a butterfly throughout the seasons of life!!!!

[@Pixielocks]

AWWW 😭💗🌈🍀💕

[@anianthe]

It's honestly so nice to see a person looking back on periods of their life where they were struggling, only to say that it did get better. It still sucks to go through but it makes me hopefull that it's just a period and you can come out of it feeling better

[@sernation]

Gosh this video is so relatable 😭💕 especially the "I didn't feel like a person so I decided not to look like one"

[@hunipyon4889]

wake up babe new pixielocks just dropped

[@dumbwaifu]

that part from 14:20 - 15:00 is exactly where i was a year ago. i was dealing with so much and looking at photos from then is so difficult but you did it in a healthy and still honest way. i never comment but i have been watching you for years. thank you for this

[@eliontheinternet3298]

I think there’s something very human and community-driven about wanting to look nice and put together. At 15:22 you’re kind of joking about it but I honestly think everyone goes through growing periods with how they present themselves, and finding a way that makes you comfortable and feel seen in the way that you want to be seen is very good. As cool and fun as it is to look like an alien, it is very normal and human and I would argue almost good to want to be presentable and palatable while still being true to yourself.

[@Rainbowpeppercorns]

I love that you talk about the struggles of living with mental illness that is the result of the trauma, instead of focusing so much on the trauma. People in my life without a trauma related dissociative disorder often think that helping me in mentally difficult times involves a lot of talking about the trauma itself. Personally, if youre not a trauma therapist or a fellow survivor of similar situations, talking about the trauma is very unhelpful and pushes me further into depression and the past. Talking about the present and the recent past, how I've been affected in my daily life by trauma and the conditions that arose from it, and what my mind is currently doing is always so so so much more helpful and uplifting. These videos remind me to reflect on my current state and recent past. Your videos are great!

[@gremlinwithstickyhands3704]

Okay no because the drag-mask-armor thing- you're SO RIGHT. For me its dysphoria as a trans man. And wearing "Put-Together Woman" as a costume is just 🤌🏻 its so real. Im still at a point where im not passing currently, and feel bad about this weird in-between Thing that i am (i know thats still beautiful in its own way, but i do feel like a Creature(tm)), and i really cling to this like pretty performance that i put on when i go out. Wearing a dress and makeup makes me feel good *as a man*, so does dressing up as an alien clown, this is hard to explain! Idk how to end this comment but just yes 💗

[@Pixielocks]

Yes you get it!!! Sending all our love 🥰🌈💕🫶🏻✨💗

[@pixxieestixx]

i just started watching this and i can really relate to the concept of this. the shifts and changes of my personality and aesthetic are sometimes pretty crazy to see

[@landimonk]

It feels like you came back to your cute pastel self that first drew me to your channel. I love your softer side that is presenting now.

[@foxjohnston4637]

19:55 Pixie @ Pixie: "Everybody's so creative!"

[@Sprinkles-is-confused]

this is so violenlty relatable. like i cannot put to words why really. its just, the self perception stuff and the amnisisa and all of the identity issues, wow i thought i was alone in stuff like this for so long and I'm finally finding people i share expirances with. its refreshing and borderline distressing in some aspect(not sure how to explain it but its sort of like just coming to the realization i should seek better help than what I'm getting, and the "oh god that's not normal?" type of freaked out )

[@mallomiyao]

You look so so pretty and ethereal in this video!! So happy for you and all your growth!!💗🌈✨

[@Pixielocks]

Aw thank you that’s so sweet 😭

[@that0negoldfish]

semi longtime watcher (i found u like in ur gummy intro era :D) and its been really interesting to see you slowly evolve in your style and interests. Even if you werent doing things that interest me personally as much as other things, I still always found myself watching! I think that says a lot about you and your skills! It's nice to see you able to reflect on that hard point and even crack some jokes about it. I've always struggled with experimenting in things that interest me like fashion, style or literally anything else for fear of looking back and hating it or "failing" so I do think its so cool to see you taking your experimention and being confident in saying "hey this was kinda weird and I dont vibe with it now but I did it and I learned what I like about it so I can use it later" AAA i ramble anyway great video keep it up and keep being urself whatever that means >w

[@Pixielocks]

Awe this comment is so so so sweet, thank you 🥺💕🌈🍀💗✨

[@plushdragonteddy]

i totally understand what you mean about not feeling like you inhabit your body until you put on makeup. i don't have DID or really anything comparable, just some mild gender dysphoria that really didn't even factor into it; i've just always felt detached from my body. i didn't realize just how true that was until the pandemic hit and i sat around in my pj's for a month and then said "you know what, i'm gonna dress up for the heck of it." so i did. i got into a cute outfit and did my makeup, and when i looked in the mirror, i remember thinking "oh yeah, i'm a person." those exact words. i was so unaware of it, but the whole time i wasn't dressing up, i saw myself in the mirror and didn't think "that's me," i thought "that's my body, a separate entity from myself" or maybe even just "that's A body." it made me so much more conscious of why fashion is so important to me. it allows me to take what's in my brain and put it on my body, connecting the two and allowing me to claim ownership. makeup has become similarly important for me. i put on makeup, and now it's MY face! so yeah, i totally relate. sometimes going real over the top and having a bunch of wild colors and shapes that shouldn't be on a face/body... makes it feel more like a face/body, or at least more like one that belongs to YOU. i can say with conviction that the most important part of fashion and makeup to me are self-expression. sure, i like feeling pretty, but it feels better just feeling like ME. (thinking "me" is pretty does help, though, lol.) i just wanted to share my experience because i don't see a lot of people talking about that. so yeah, you're not alone, and i'm glad you were able to find a way to connect to yourself even when you were struggling to edit: ok going thru more of the video i must admit feeling pretty is also quite important fhdjskh IT *IS* NICE

[@camsnyder7332]

I am so so happy for you Pixie, I feel like you made a breakthrough. But can I just say you SLAYED even when you were going through it?! Like what a flex

[@graceleathers5970]

I love seeing people grow and getting to know themselves better and becoming more self aware. You do you Pixie!

[@coolycoollo]

I've loved all of the changes and phases you have been through! 🥰

[@Pixielocks]

🥺💗

[@OpenWorldGirlMR]

I appreciate this video because i also went through a moment in my life where i completely lost it. My mental illnesses went fishing lol. Going back through my phone is painful. I recorded videos of myself every night bc i felt so alone i only wanted to talk to myself. I like externalized myself in front of myself? And one of the closest friends i had, our friendship ended temporarily and i would talk to them outloud all day long and it was scary bc i sometimes see them on the corner of my eye. I asked someone if i was developing something else and she said no, youre just coping with trauma right now. And i used to black out every night and go on "doom walks" at 4am. By myself, just talking to myself or listening to music. Im in a way better place thank god. But now im doing the work of picking up the pieces. Brains are weird, but if anyone needs to hear this. Youre not alone!!! If i can get out of my darkness, anyone can. I thought i was too far gone.

[@alicethemad1613]

Jill: I just wanna be nice and a little soft Jer: Sometimes we can be spiky.

[@vctrthesilly]

godddd i feel this so so much pixie. i’m a ptsd (& co) haver and a drag artist and when i look back on some of my looks from a certain period of time before my big hospital stay…girl…you expressed everything SO well, it’s such a weird and difficult feeling to capture and i guess i can’t fully understand because obviously i’ve had different experiences to y’all and i don’t have any suspicions that i’m plural but i REALLY connect with you on this one. especially due to having gender dysphoria and one of the only ways i could express femininity in a way that felt safe to me was drag and i felt so inhuman sometimes that i just took it to a degree that it did not need to be at. now i’m a lot more in tune to my femininity and masculinity and i can express both in and out of drag but for a hot second there it was ALL warped due to largely ptsd. whew. insightful video. love y’all 🫶

[@emmawatkins6990]

That strawberry cup is everything

[@Pixielocks]

Hehehe we have three others but they got super faded in the dishwasher 😭😭😭

[@elenyamt]

Pixie, I am so happy you are back, I followed your videos since years but was confused when the extreme makeup phase was happening, and just being able to watch these videos again and see you! You are positive and joy! Love you tons.

[@Splurdgle]

It's almost like a caricature! Like your brain was trying to draw your face but it was exaggerated and not right. ❤ I'm glad you are in a better place sweetheart!

[@emmasalisbury7233]

I love all your looks and I loved this video!!! Though I kept giggling cuz as the nose highlight got bigger I started to think of like, the characters in tv who put a line of sunscreen on their nose 😭😆

[@Pixielocks]

Real 😭😭😭💗🌈💕✨ Thank you so much 🥰

[@princess.roberts]

tbh it feels weird hearing you say you hated some of these looks cause i love them! but i see that u identify with yourself more now :)

[@Pixielocks]

Awe thank you 🥺 I like some but not others 🫣💕

[@soreleious]

i love you pixie! ushualy a silent follower but seeing the growth and new happiness is really making me smile! you have been a huge inspiration for years now thankyou 💕🌸🌼

[@Pixielocks]

Aw this is so kind!!! Thank you so much 🥰🌈💕🫶🏻✨💗

[@mackh.4469]

This video makes me so happy, I watched you all the time growing up and now as a 23 year old woman you’re starting to feel familiar again and I can relate to all your growth and work on yourself ❤️ Keep it up beautiful!!🌈

[@Lyuciferrr]

i remember doing the lil flower on the tip of the nose inspired by you and my friends thought it was super cute, but yeah i totally get feeling like an old man or like a creature, sometimes im just like this, then i see myself after crying for an hour and im like ''omg the prettiest princess alive''

[@batbrainbat]

We're currently dealing with the aftermath of a very very recent system discovery, and you and a few other content creators have been making it so much less terrifying. Especially videos like this, that are both so light-hearted but also super real, these are making us feel a lot less, like... aaack, you know? I love y'all-

[@honeyplummm]

Yaaay hi! I can't sleep so this is a very good timing thank you Pixie!

[@bugaboo_daisy9000]

Im really glad you were able to transition to a more authentic version of yourself, rather than a caricature. Ive had the same feelings.

[@bellarose1562]

Wish I could give you hugs pixie! I’m glad you’re sorting through all the stuff in your closet 🫶. We’ll be here while you do ☺️

[@SunbleachedBones666]

I can’t get over how amazing the intro and outro is

[@BaileySuttonMusic]

I remember when I was a teen and didn't feel very good about my appearance, I was known for making extrememly goofy faces in photos that were taken of me. It seemed like a goofy fun thing at the time, and in ways I know it it was. But in other ways I know i was hiding behind it, but didn't really recognize that at the time. Its very interesting to look back on those kind of moments.

[@BAKAROID]

I did remember this period where you only wore the drag makeup, but it's WILD to me that that was 2 years ago-- It's very interesting to hear what your process was ! I'm so glad you're feeling better. 💛💕

[@magicalbeancosplay]

as soon as Oliver and I started the video we were like 🧐 that is definitely Jerr being around 😂 /pos 🩷💕🌸💗💜🌈 here's to growth and learning and being silly and fun and finding yourselves along the way 🫶💕🩷🌸

[@Pixielocks]

The way I couldn’t tell at the time is crazyyyy like wtf. When I edited in the ad and heard the voice drop when it ended I literally was like 🫣

[@mm-qp5lv]

I had a really similar experience with a really similar thought process with identity issues and making myself look like really… different with makeup out of fear of being judged and put on a pedestal like I literally used to put red lipstick underneath my eyes and on my nose LOLL anyways I love your videos pixie!! They are really reliable as someone who has mental problems as well and similar interests like precure ^_^ I’m so glade you are healing and sharing your experiences

[@Rae-Nbow]

Hey, hi, hello, a bean here with permanent depersonalisation, I have never had a concept of my own face, I do not clock myself in the mirror, it's just a face, I have to pull a face or stick my tongue out or something for my brain to even connect that it is a reflection of myself, it's almost traumatic to go through photos of past me because, who that frick is that, like, it's not the same as you are dealing with here, as I don't have DID or the like, but seeing old photos of me with different hairstyles/colours is a wild experience as I truly can't recognise it as myself. I go out of my way to look extreme in some way and it took me a long time to understand why, it I had this wild make-up or unique hair or these piercings it was easier to pick myself out of a crowd, I instantly knew, oh that person with the orange hair, that's me! Sitting at my computer right now when I try to picture my face I see short buzzcut dark hair, septum piercing and my eye colour but it is not like I have eyes it's just my weird grey/green/blue eye colour, I can picture nothing else, nose shape, lip shape, face shape nothing! I also sometimes superimpose people's faces onto mine, it happens a lot with Hayley Williams and 2 of the girls I knew growing up who I thought were/are just stunning Anyway, ramble over

[@Rae-Nbow]

Also am AFAB, physically present female as I have crazy fem features and many a swervey curve to my body, but mentally I do not align with any gender and happily use all pronouns

[@odetosilas]

BABE WAKE UP NEW PIXIE VIDEO DROPPED

[@Pixielocks]

WAKIE WAKIE EGGS AND BAKIE 🍳🥓💕

[@lidda9010]

I supported that phase all the way but this video was a SIGH of RELIEF for me 🙈💖 Glad to hear you found yourselves again. 🌸🌈

[@JaspurrDesigns]

As someone who's always felt very torn between a two different styles (both in fashion and in my art) and has just been stuck in a weird in-between that feels too normal to satisfy either, I will always commend going through the process of trying new things with your style that are bold. Even if it doesn't work out, it's a good way to figure yourself out through such a massive shift in self perception. How you present is such a massive foundation of stability for your identity, and I can only imagine how critical that is for all of you post diagnosis 💖

[@Angela.Phillips]

Glad you're feeling a bit better now x

[@sproutgarden_]

I love u and I love the cosmo n Wanda clips 💕proud of u always mwah

[@eliontheinternet3298]

You’ve got the cute little new strawberry!

[@Tysilee]

Big hugs! I'm glad you're back. I remember feeling thrown off by this period and I'm gravitating back to your content esp now that you've claimed that period as "weird." Keep being inspirational!

[@sum_shine]

so in love with your jewelry!

[@mitsuri3225]

omg the calico critters in houses on ur wall is adorbs ⭐🐇

[@autumnmarilyn5216]

I did love the flower nose drag, I thought it was very unique and cute. However, and this is not a read but it was definitely your season 7 Trixie Mattel (dare I say pixie mattel) era. You don’t have anywhere to go but up and soon you’ll be on Babrie PR list

[@vogelvrouw]

This comment is so funny (and accurate) like the vision and vibe is there, it just needs a little shaping

[@ShutYourDream]

HELPPP YOURE GONNA HATE ME BUT I WAS JUST WATCHING UR TILTED SEPTUM AND UR LIPS TALKING AND I THOUGHT OF FLATS FROM SPONGEBOB BC HE HAS THE DIAGNOAL-Y EYES😭anyways i'm glad you seem to be heading in a good direction Pixie, wish you all the happy and health

[@Pixielocks]

THAT IS AMAZING LMAO I WISH 😭😭😭💗💗💗

[@kaerunykol]

new pixie upload 🩵🩵

[@dawnt0pia]

nah cuz i love your makeup looks so much!!

[@CupcakeFairy777]

12:45 I love that dress 👗

[@ViktorErikFade]

Imagine my interest growing to confusion when I came back to watching your videos full time when you started doing the drag looks lol That video was also helpful for me as I too was cleaning a mental closet with pronouns etc And that was right after I figured out I was nonbinary so I felt seen I'm very glad your normal alt makeup came back as I never got used to the looks But I am also still very glad to have witnessed the practicing drag makeup pixie era don't get me wrong It was a ride and a half

[@Pixielocks]

Mental closet with pronouns 😭💗🌈💕 Thank u for this sweet comment 💗💗💗

[@ViktorErikFade]

@@Pixielocks you welcome ! 🥺 🌜 I'm going through my own journey with gender so I get it but from an entirely different lens kinda A few years ago I came out as nonbinary then REALLY into following trans Instagram and tiktok people and relating to them....then realized the subconcious trend and yeah - pretty sure I'm trans masc 😅 Would explain why I hate looking at my own reflection and other stuff but can stomach who I am for now on other days . Cosplay is my escape because I can be very masculine I hope you and your system are doing well (or at least a little better than the day before let's be real) Have a flower (>'u')>🌻🌷💮 💛🤍💜🖤 💙💕🤍💕💙

[@PeacheIIe]

Can you please tell me the like, technical name of the trauma therapy you did/are doing? because I have no idea where to start and it seems like there are way more types of therapy in the US and Canada than where I live; if you know the official name of your specific one maybe I can find something similar 😭

[@Pixielocks]

CBT and EMDR!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 Wishing you luck 🥺💗

[@mosaic2476]

absolutely love and am so grateful for you talking about this! our whole system discovery thing started this year and finally, when we see ourselves in the mirror, our face is rarely being all weird (our eyes multiplying and moving around was such a common experience) and we still don't feel a sense of "that's me", but it has at least, mostly, come to a state of "that there is a friendly body and it's carrying all of us inside".

[@mosaic2476]

... who commented this? we've known about being a system since 2019 😅

[@EmmaLawlor14]

Our ever evolving Pokémon! Who love’s a good Steven universe Gem fusion💕 these past few years have had a great impact on everyone🥰🌙

[@Pixielocks]

This is so sweet thank u love 😭💗💗💗💗

[@zefrontg60]

I looooove the rainbow drag look that Veronica did 🎉

[@gutz8359]

Video hasn’t rlly started yet but omg you’re soo pretty ❤❤

[@Pixielocks]

🥺💕🌈🍀💗

[@BekkiUndSo]

I follow you on Twitter and have for so long and I vividly remember this, but not to the degree I'm seeing here. It's not a bad look, but it's just so - hard on you. And most of them don't look like you which I get it, that's kinda the point, but they also don't feel like you. They feel like Emilia Fart came back from 2018 and started cosplaying you with a wannabe Trixie as her makeup artist :'D I'm glad you can look at them and laugh about it

[@Dzaeli]

the vibe changed so much for a while I could tell you were going through something but hey, it's all part of the process. if only we could step into like a little therapy cocoon while processing trauma or identity crises and come out when it's done instead of having to go about life in front of everyone, but at least we're not alone.

[@EthicalMyths]

Favorite part of the week: When pixie posts😁

[@asims2megafan]

yusss i haven’t been this early to a pixie video in a while

[@Pixielocks]

Hehe hewwo

[@scribblerat9083]

With you talking about wanting to wear stuff you've made for drag - I'd love to see a showcase of the outfits you've made, especially the crochet ones! :)

[@dagurulfsson291]

I just started this video but girl I remember this era and I was so very worried about you. I am so glad you got through that and I'm not even through the video yet! And its amazing you feel comfortable enough (and stable enough) to talk about it now.

[@dagurulfsson291]

As a fellow system you definitely seem like you're in a much better space now. You've come really far! Also isn't it just the worst when there's secretly a hater in the front with you hahaha I also almost always miss it at first too

[@jelliejem]

I did wonder about the drag era makeup. I didn't hate it, figured it was a new chapter in your life, but I did wonder why the stark transition into this kind of makeup. I love the look you have on currently too but only because it feels nostalgic for someone who has watched your videos since your haul video days

[@alem7224]

You look so beautiful today! Thank you for the video💕

[@TI3RU]

as someone who mostly listens to videos without watching, I had to go back to the beginning when y'all said "It's Jill" and I could've *sworn* I heard Jerr in there, so I'm glad I got the confirmation going back 😂 I'm glad to hear he's around and comfy enough to co-con on camera! and although I don't have DID myself, I can definitely relate to having major style changes after huge revelations or trauma, that's how I first went from femme to butch/soft butch 🤔

[@theo13333]

Dude once I was dissociating to the extreme and I looked in the mirror and saw the Scottish poet Robert burns

[@Pixielocks]

Real as hell

[@honorbound1337]

Hi Jerr and Jill! Thank y'all for being vulnerable and being willing to talk about this, I'm really glad you guys are feeling a bit more confident in who you are and how you present. 😊

[@simi3489]

being able to look back on urself and even laugh and lovingly make fun of urself is SO healthy and SUCH a hard place to get to. this video is awesome!!! 💕💕

[@meganbarbardo9609]

I have not seen this Jillian since the Lolita days. Wishing you all the best and love in the world ❤

[@daintycaked]

It's totally okay for you to call yourself crazy or whatever variant. I get it. I'm a psycho chick myself.

[@muttmania]

I love the self respect in this, I really like the idea of honouring your past self, I think this is important

[@someonelogical7555]

Oh this is gonna be GOOD

[@floofmccloud]

I have to be honest I stumbled across a thumbnail from that time the other day and thought I am so glad that look was just a phase 😅 love that you are turning it into a discussion around mental health (Only two minutes in rn tho)

[@sonicleaves]

Ah yes, the Devine days.

[@august1451]

Just noticed the Jillian MTA video was filmed during this time, which I find interesting (as you were undergoing identity struggles AS Jill at the time). Do you think you'd ever refilm that, or do you feel it's still a solid representation of your role, even if you were a little uncertain at the time?

[@baby.ribz.]

No cos your everyday drag makeup was iconic for a second 💕 like u inspired me to shave my eyebrows clean off and I still do it today hahah xxx

[@baby.ribz.]

So good to see ur happier and healthier now bestie ❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷

[@fattyghostg]

i LOVE your style its so healing to see

[@alliekatsuitu]

I can relate to the data from Star Trek comment lol definitely looked in the mirror and seen an old man before 🤣 were the same age hehe

[@beamarie4277]

I kinda left for a while but I feel like I came back at a good time 💖

[@Pixielocks]

Omg you definitely did 😭😭😭 TLDR I have a dissociative disorder 😭💗🌈🫶🏻

[@olic1008]

I actually liked your experimental makeup looks! I especially liked the makeup you did for slumber party sesh 2 years ago (very whimsical n fem).. youre always v pretty ^.^ but I ofc love your signature makeup look and Im so glad that youre feeling more stability and inner peace ! ♡ I am rooting for you 🎉💕

[@pup401]

watching you for almost 7 years now, looking back you have had a good amount of your life on the internet, documenting your changes and mental health and growing with your viewers. As teens and young adults, we’re all searching for a major part of our identity whether it be through appearance, interests, identities, values, etc. It’s a good thing to look back and cringe and laugh, because it’s evidence we’ve grown and changed. lots of love to the pixie crew 💗

[@louisevessey3839]

It's awesome that you have been able to work through so much and are feeling more like Jillian/ Pixie. Your humour and perspective on the evolution of yourselves is so great. ❤

[@Pixielocks]

Awe thank you mama 🥰💗🌈🍀🫶🏻✨

[@Jerrytheworm]

I'm glad you're feeling better now

[@bernadettehull3027]

I'm going through this right now. Do you have any tips that helped everyone

[@CupcakeFairy777]

Dude your a girl you look so cute just like you are pixie 🧚 love you girly GOD bless pray to God thing will get better you got this 🙏🏻💗