REALIZATION: Minimalism and Saying No

[@parkerrose3590]

I had an Aha moment yesterday, when I discovered things I stored in duffle bags on the closet floor in my bedroom were ruined by water that leaked from the air condition unit in my apartment. I had to go through everything and throw away many things, including paper that I had saved. Part of me was heartbroken, but another part was happy. I realized that this "Stuff" was not THAT important after all and it made me throw out even more things, Hope you will share this story with others.

[@jamiecorisis6122]

I think without realizing, or maybe you do, you use your psychology background in your videos. I feel like you walk us through things so methodically and help us as a community to learn who we are! You ask us to do things like journal, clear out the things in our lives that don’t suit us. You work through our thinking to guide us to better decisions. Thank you!

[@Marsolan]

Totally ❤

[@pattysperfectday5397]

I love this. It makes so much sense. The better I get at decluttering the better I find I am at setting boundaries. You’re right the opposite is also true. They really do reinforce each other. Great video!,

[@ElinLesser]

Thanks so much!

[@vivianhudacek1556]

Enjoyed your video, one of several I’ve watched over the months. I’m glad to say that I followed with my heart as a liberal arts undergrad, majored in English, & had a wonderful, long fulfilling teaching career. I was absolutely devastated when my liberal arts college where I taught closed. I retired early as a result, over a decade ago. That change has allowed me to spend time with family & to do whatever I want. Some may think I’m selfish not to do community work or other activities, but I was drowning in those things as a teacher. This is MY time, & I don’t feel one bit guilty!

[@ElinLesser]

Love that! I agree! Teaching is a very selfless career and I agree that you deserve this time! Such a great example of a priority shift that is important. Thanks for sharing your story!

[@sarahk5916]

I think people are complex and our values can change, or compete against each other. Which is why we often we struggle to say no when something aligns with one value but pulls against another. We contain multitudes, we contradict ourselves, as Walt Whitman puts it.

[@Conval-wi5eh]

When we know our values, it's not only easier to say no to stuff, people and obligations, but also to bad habits and unhealthy coping mechanisms.

[@essentialsimplicity]

I really align with this. I also chose a field of study based on thinking it was interesting and I did well in a half year course in high school so since I couldn’t think of anything else to study, I went with it. Ended up with a Master’s degree in social work so I didn’t even pick a lucrative career path (LOL), but like you, I thought it gave me options. My first two positions weren’t the best fit, but they put me into a position that I loved for 16 years until the grant funding ended. It wasn’t a typical social work job but after it ended there wasn’t anything else like it and I realized this was not the field I should have chosen. Unfortunately, I don’t know what else I would do as a paid career. Plus I’m close to retirement so my focus is more on what do I want to do in that stage of my life and I have ideas that excite me. Not sure my interests will provide income, but I’m hopeful that I can do it as a volunteer and if I end up deciding to pursue it and be compensated, then that’s a bonus. I have done much work on figuring out my values and aligning my life with them (my home, my spending/finances, activities etc.) and appreciate your focus on this as well. Wish all of this was available to me 30 years ago. 😊 But, as the saying goes, the next best time is now. Thank you for always providing such thoughtful content.

[@lidijazivanovic2810]

Good for you 👍, I learned to say no recently ( I am 55 years old now), but it's so true saying it is easy. What you do after is what counts 😊😊😊

[@bearinthewoods9068]

After listening to several of your videos and enjoying your insights into the psychology of minimalism and owning less, I wondered if you had training in psychology. Even if you decided not to pursue a career in psychology, your training has added a depth of understanding to minimalism that is unique. Thank you for your great insights!

[@sleepingroses761]

The power of "No" is such a big one for me! It can certainly be hard for me to choose, though!

[@ElinLesser]

agreed!

[@kerricraft]

I am so grateful for you & your videos. Like you, I am coming to terms with the limitations a chronic disease is imposing on my life and how that means I need to be more careful with my time & choices. This video was SO helpful. Thank you!!!!

[@vwilson6355]

This is the best video on personal growth that I have ever seen! Thank you so much! You have challenged me to determine my values, clarify them, and brainstorm ideas for change and improvement so my life lines up with my values and priorities. Those include not only striving for minimalism and peace in my life, but also priorities family, friends, and service to others. All the best to you. Vicky

[@melissataylor8910]

Love this video!!❤️

[@karolinasundkvist5762]

Such an insightful and warm video! It will definitely help me today and in the future. I lost my job a while ago, and have to decide what to do next. What do I want? What's best for me and my family? What are my values? Your excellent advice will help in the process, thank you!

[@jeffslavick9417]

Your videos and what you share has helped me so much with gaining perspective.

[@joannafoster3423]

Very good video!

[@SandraJaneen]

Excellent advice here. A video to return to at intervals, to check one’s progress. Thank you!

[@alovero]

i think our society’s obsession w doing more more more is partly a rejection of the fact that we are finite - that we can’t live forever and we can’t have everything and do everything. but we act like we can, because maybe that reinforces this false belief that we’ll always have more time to either “have it all” or deal with it later