Relationship Therapist Shares Red Flags for Women who Date Women Later in Life

When you come out later in life, it can feel like you are playing catch up. Especially when it comes to dating, it can be easy to feel invalidated by those around you.
To help you feel LESS like that, I have put together some of the most common red flags I would recommend you be aware of, especially when you are just getting into your first same sex dating adventures.
This week's Ask a Therapist video is all about Red Flags that you need to pay attention to when you first start dating again. Some of these may be self explanatory, and some may not. But of all the "flags" that are out there, these are the ones that really do lead to the most problematic outcomes down the road when they are not dealt with.
I'd love to share more about this type of content, so don't forget to comment below if you want to hear more. AND, let me know if there are other things you'd like to see in our channel perks!
#wlw #datingredflags #laterinlife
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Kelly is a LMHC (Licensed Mental Health Counselor) in the USA making KZbin videos to inform, entertain, and empower viewers. Watching these videos does not constitute a therapeutic relationship or therapy. Should you wish to find a therapist, or more information, check out the links below!
Helpful Links:
❤️If you need support, you can dail 2-1-1-. 2-1-1 is a free, confidential referral and information helpline and website that connects people of all ages and from all communities to the essential emotional support they need, 24 hours a day, seven days a week; www.211.org/
🧡The Trevor Project: www.thetrevorp...
💛Looking for a therapist in your area? Check out Psychology Today: www.psychology...
💚Great article on Internalized Homophobia: www.rainbow-pr...
💙 Instagram: @AnchoredCounselingFL
💜 Instagram: @KellyRMinter
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[@alexbeebee9366]

i'm liking the reverb to be honest. really useful vid. thanks.

[@KellyRMinter]

haha thanks. Sometimes I just like to have fun with the editing, I know it's not always for everyone 🩷

[@perlapepper]

Hi Kelly! Thank you so much for this video! It really helped validate the gut feeling I had with my first lesbian “relationship.” My person showed all these flags and I felt deeply insecure and wasn’t sure why. Now, I understand and so grateful we no longer see each other. I have a question about labels though - This same person said to me that before I can bring her (or any woman) home to meet my family that I need to be out first. She said it would be disrespectful and awkward for her to be the first woman I bring home to meet my family and use her as my way of coming out to them. As someone who is still struggling with a label, do I need to come out to my family first before I bring any future partners to meet them? I’m not dating or seeking now, but I think about this a lot. I’m a very private person and even chose not to tell my family about past hetero relationships. At this time it feels safer for me not to share my romantic life with them and it never crossed my mind that I hide my partners. In fact, I feel like I was sparing my partners from dealing with my family. I hope this all makes sense. Thanks again for your help 💜

[@KellyRMinter]

Hey there! First of all I'm sorry it took me so long to get to this question. The simplest answer I can give you is it's a very individual thing. While that person had the right to say they did not want to come home to meet your family without you being out, and not to want to be part of that process. But it isn't fair for them to determine that no one else would want to be part of that process. It does make it more complicated on the level of the future with that relationship. See, if you bring somebody home and that is the way that you come out to your family, and then you break up, there's a whole lot of questions that usually come from the family like "were you really gay" "was it just about that person?" It also can drive a wedge between that partner and your family because sometimes they will blame the partner for "making you gay" if they didn't know before. But so much of this is nuanced by the family relationship and the romantic relationship. So there really isn't a straight forward answer here. I would suggest you take with a grain of salt anything that someone who was displaying these behaviors said to you, also. ♥️♥️

[@isaidwhatisaid.1012]

Omg everything you said is spot on!!!! Thank you for this video

[@KellyRMinter]

Thank you for watching 💜💜

[@YBCause]

I love your channel

[@KellyRMinter]

Thank you so much for watching! It really means a lot ❤️❤️

[@michaelcrandall1569]

Great video

[@KellyRMinter]

Thank you! And thanks for watching 💛💛

[@sds6303]

Hey! Do you practice in NY as well as FL? Thank you!

[@KellyRMinter]

I'm actually expecting to be licensed in NY by the end of the summer! Feel free to contact me at the email in the description, or through my website! 🧡🧡🧡

[@darkhorse7460]

I know you were smiling because you were thinking of you and your wife's chore division!!

[@KellyRMinter]

Bahahaha you know it! 💚💚

[@susanyoung6579]

Drop the reverb, it's not working.

[@KellyRMinter]

Thanks for the tip 💜💜

[@susanyoung6579]

@@KellyRMinter you're welcome. Sorry if I sounded harsh. It made the topic of the entire section to follow harder to hear clearly. If you're say listening to the video while doing chores or something like that it makes the whole thing more difficult to follow.

[@KellyRMinter]

No worries, I listen to things while I'm doing other stuff too. I like using a tone to demonstrate change, but if that one is too hard to hear I can definitely try something else! Not everything is going to land well 🙂