Rings of Power Review Tolkien HORROR Gets Worse - Season 2 Episode 3

[@disparutoo]

Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power review of Season 2 Episode 3 where it's easily the worst of the series so far. I'm not sure why they thought adding this episode to the initial release would help them. After this episode, I think they'll lose a LOT of viewers. It contains all of the characters that no-one cares about, and their storylines are unrelated to the actual one anyone cares about, the rings. Instead to replace actual content we instead of Baby Shelob, no seriously, and more rolling of R's than you can shake a stick at. But what did you think of what you saw? Let me know your thoughts down below and as always, thanks for watching :)

[@skibidi.G]

YES ✌️😊

[@Gunn27]

Do some orcs wear jonnies?

[@brianmurphy6480]

First we had Baby Yoda, now we have Baby Shelob. I'm sensing merch opportunities! 🤔

[@Auxius.]

You missed that Isildur put on the corpses boots and takes his blade 26:55 xD

[@karahughes7074]

And the fact that this spider is more likely to be Ungoliant is not even mentioned.

[@The_Laughing_Cavalier]

"Do you know how the orcs came into being? When a mummy orc and a daddy orc love each other very much..." - Saruman the White

[@mirouart2884]

😂😂😂

[@BradleyWynne]

😂😂😂😂

[@cr9281]

Funny, but you stole this comment..

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

@@The_Laughing_Cavalier Saruman the WHAT?!?!

[@michaelkapelis287]

Rule 34?

[@vexmyth0clast]

Who else is watching these videos instead of the actual show? 🙋

[@constantlyenthused336]

Guilty as charged 😂

[@lawjef]

Disney, sell your entire movie / tv production business to YT and take stocks in Google/Alphabet. Problem solved.

[@Username18981]

Everyone. Pretty sure the only people watching the show are KZbin commentators

[@Novastar.SaberCombat]

Please consider supporting independent creators in lieu of Zon, Didnay, Hollywon't, and other corrupt corporations. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)

[@annienglish4378]

Guilty as charged! 😢

[@greggeiger7532]

Sauron always has this half surprised look on his face and you can tell he’s thinking, “I can’t believe it’s this easy.” 😂

[@Werewolf.with.Internet.Access]

“They can’t be this stupid- oh gods they ARE”

[@Black_Revue]

I know, he looks like he is Playing a Game on the Highest Difficulty and Steamrolling Everything

[@nickkoyle3599]

Games Journos got their easy mode. We must stop the alternate timeline!!

[@mikoto7693]

@@nickkoyle3599If I were watching the tv show, I would explain it away as an alternative timeline.

[@TheNo15]

He's not a real character, he's a guy picking all the troll options in a triple A slopgame

[@alphaomega1328]

Elendil the average sized, Isildur the dropout failure, Arantarrrrrrrrrrrr the wannabe pirate bloke, Galadiriel the nose scruncher, Should not be named Durin, Gil Galad the beringed, Elrond the coffee hipster, Al-Pharezon the badger bearded and Arondir the spinny spinny top. What a stellar cast and characters they gave us.

[@witchking2063]

Don't forget our favorite, murderous "not hobits"

[@davidpa9266]

Was there at LEAST Shelob the large-breasted and scantily clad?

[@daniell1483]

So glad they went off-script, much improved the story, rite?

[@Fauxkerykes]

Er, you mean Guyladiriel?

[@Karthig1987]

Did the brown elf exist in the lore?

[@wumpusrat]

Wait, wait, wait. Hold on here. This is Shelob BEING BORN in this moment? Shelob was one of Ungoliant's direct children. She was born in the first age, and spent thousands of years lurking in the mountains of Cirith Ungol. She's the reason that area had such a dark reputation -- because she'd been there for CENTURIES. Yet this show has her being born at the end of the second age? All because what, they desperately want to tie their show to the story. Ugh. If she's being born right now, that means that in their show, Ungoliant would still be lurking around somewhere and having children. Hell with Sauron, if Ungoliant is still around SHE is the most dangerous, evil thing lurking in Middle Earth right now. And another question, if these are all the spider hatchlings being born, who dragged him in there? It would have to be, well, the mother spider, right? Which would be Ungoliant herself.

[@GH-ub7qz]

get all the way off the writers backs

[@isitPC]

You're assuming the writers know who or what Ungoliant is... They're just watching the movies and making shit up as they go along at this point...Next we'll find Gollum's mum was shagged by Sauron.. 🤣🕷

[@audreybailey5139]

You’re not suppose to ask logical questions.

[@tlrlml]

The power of prequel; Talent can be exchanged for changing the original works meanings, intentions, and timelines to whatever you think will sell (financially or politically).

[@mikoto7693]

I don’t know who or what Ungoliant is, being a fairly casual fan of the LotR franchise but the rest of your comment makes sense. I wish that they stopped ruining the franchises with new series such as The Acolyte and this. If I were in charge of a show like this I would read every scrap of lore so I could respect it.

[@levifoster5639]

Tolkien is spinning in his grave fast enough to provide electricity to all of London

[@CorePathway]

Tolkien isn’t spinning; his corpse has been exhumed and is being tag-teamed by these literary necropheliacs

[@levifoster5639]

@@CorePathway Thank you for putting such a horrifying image in my head T_T

[@antithetical]

Yes but what the RoP fans will want to know, is it net zero electricity?

[@Zimisacartoon]

Well at least it green bro..thats why they done this..its about Climate change and using dead people to save the world from oil

[@florinnatu]

😂😂😂

[@Likexner]

"An orc might actually have written this" is my new favorite piece of meta-head-canon-lore.

[@jamesmetcalf5597]

A crowded tavern no better place to talk about overthrowing the kingdom, the writers of this show wouldn't have the mental capacity to change a light bulb.

[@CorePathway]

That’s what PAs are for.

[@DH-xw6jp]

To be fair, the US revolution was planned in a pub, and King Charles II banned coffee houses in 1675 because they were a hotbed for sedition. There is precedent for it.

[@DH-xw6jp]

I mean... It has precedent. The US revolution was planned in a pub, and king Charles II outlawed coffee houses in 1675 for the same reason.

[@xiii0722]

Sigh, yeah, have to agree

[@DH-xw6jp]

@@jamesmetcalf5597 I have tried to reply 3 times.... But maybe I'm using words the autoban bot doesn't like, Let me try again. King Charles II outlawed coffee houses in 1675 for this exact reason.

[@hisdudeness8328]

So ‘young Isildur’ stabbing the baby spider in the eye is supposed to be the tie in for the messed up eye Shelob has in the films, effectively tying the two together? Cool cool. So, when are they planning to cover the ethnic cleansing of the non-white dwarves and elves?

[@alexandermccabe556]

when i said i didnt think season 1 could get worse i didnt think amazon would take that as a challenge

[@Novastar.SaberCombat]

I don't know why people keep coming back to corrupt corporations which consistently churn out crap. 🙄 Instead, they might consider supporting independent artists and creators. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)

[@alessandrorinaldi842]

The only good thing that happened because of this people trashing my favorites IP's, Is that they made me discover Disparu

[@FrandrickoftheAzureFlame]

I owe this discovery to Just Some Guy.

[@odojang]

I owe it to Kurtzmantrek. Being a fan of his ever since.

[@jasonjones7461]

I want an entire spinoff series about that horse. It's by far the best character so far

[@aaronblank2318]

I'm legitimately having trouble coming up with an argument against the horse being the best character in this series.

[@paulnolan2691]

Neigh.

[@GH-ub7qz]

Mr....Ed...dard Stark, the immortal

[@Andreas_42]

The Lord of the Rings - The Horse of Power 😂

[@therealabechance]

Be careful what you wish for, someone will see this comment and make a Rohan series…oh wait

[@aranikar2]

Adar: "We will never be safe if Sauron lives!" Orc : "I definitely feel a bit safer living near an active volcano, created by Waldreg."

[@PeoplePleaser578]

“We are just looking for a safe home… so we picked Hell because why not”.

[@momoyome]

More people are watching this than the show.

[@Novastar.SaberCombat]

If only they'd support something from *independent* creators. Something of value. Something with a soul. 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge; hope's strength, resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again." 🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨ --Diamond Dragons (series)

[@BradleyWynne]

Yep.

[@insensitive919]

That's a shame, because isomniacs could really benefit from this show.

[@Gunn27]

@@insensitive919Who?

[@tmkrick]

​@@Gunn27insomniacs

[@Bignuke87]

Ive wondered for over 20 years how shelob got that eye injury...its actually one of the most pressing unanswered bits of lore until now. I can finally die happy.

[@johnstuartkeller5244]

Wasn't that eye injured by a space cat?

[@badman5852]

I thought this and the Jackson trilogy weren't connected, so how does that make any sense in any way?

[@Andreas_42]

At least that would spare you the rest of this show.

[@zdenda66alorddandas86]

​@@badman5852I think it was a joke ? xD

[@badman5852]

@@zdenda66alorddandas86 the post was a joke. The actor said that is how Shelob got the scar in a film trilogy that isn't connected to the show he is in.

[@MichaelB-jw5po]

"Humanizing orcs goes straight back to Tolkien" is just more proof that these showrunners do not understand Tolkien's work at all

[@MrFallenone]

More like misunderstand. There is a good reason why he turned them into mindless followers with no will of their own. People with no chance of salvation is anti-tolkien.

[@upschutt4842]

As someone living close to the Black Forest I must say, indeed no one returns - except for Hänsel and Gretel, but that's another story.

[@CorePathway]

Can you imagine what these hacks would do to that tale? (Cough Snow not-so-White cough)

[@Andreas_42]

I know Deutsche Bahn has troubles right now, but no one returning is a bit far-fetched 😉

[@LadyAlaina42-c3e]

It is such a beautiful place, lucky you....

[@upschutt4842]

@@CorePathway well, the original fairy tale already provides a body positive Hänsel

[@jkdbuck7670]

Another story....that Amazon can ruin

[@stephenschroeder2141]

The English did not eat bugs The hobbits do not eat bugs This slander is wholly unwarranted

[@seefoghall]

This show is wholey unwarranted.

[@Mick-zi2pj]

I reckon some of these 'skilled workers' are bug eaters

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

We have not seen what Disparu has seen.

[@Franka.1966]

@@Novastar.SaberCombat 🙄💤

[@SplendidFactor]

We have seen enough...

[@Gunn27]

@@Novastar.SaberCombatReport this as spam people. I have.

[@tlrlml]

@@SplendidFactor Yes, but you have not seen what Disparu has seen.

[@jamie_d0g978]

We have seen our share...

[@VaderPopsVicodin10]

Galadrial's "Ugyuh!" is my new favorite ROP Disparu meme..😂 0:06

[@Likexner]

Same here. I hope he uses it whenever theres a "romance" scene in one of these shows.

[@SammEater]

She is kinda cute, not gonna lie.

[@Kal_g]

We now return to "Disparu losing his mind..."

[@Alondro77]

This is the backstory of how Disparu became Mr. Plinkett.

[@cattrucker8257]

If he ever finds his mind, that'll be when he retires.

[@daniell1483]

Its funny how his hair slowly degenerates over the course of a video.

[@beezysbeatz4924]

And his teeth evidentally. TF? Sorry mate, but that shit is preventable AND fixable so miss me with the accusations of ANY kind 😅

[@Maladjester]

@@beezysbeatz4924 Did you do "evidentally" on purpose because if so it's quite good.

[@aredjayc2858]

>straight back to Tolkien Events that occur over 2000 years apart occur out of order within a month of one another

[@danbal4185]

It's really mindblowing. And since the "Kingsmen" are already taking power in Numenor why in the future they will came in aid to the elves against Sauron? I have the suspicion that they will combine the war against Sauron and his capture by Pharazon in one single big event, which is...retarded!

[@aredjayc2858]

@@danbal4185Mordor was created in 1000 SA, and Tar Miriel was born in 3117 SA Yet in the show she's already an adult before Mordor was created

[@Klickor]

The waking of the Balrog and/or the arrival of the Istari is something like mid 3d age if I recall correctly. So like 1500 3d age. Barad dur is built like year 1000 2nd age and that age lasts for about 3400 years. So close to 4000 years between events and not just over 2000.

[@chaiboy854]

they really dont have an understanding of time and space. its why the elves went off to another continent and somehow gladriel swam back... across an ocean as if it was no problem.

[@teenageHorrorMan8]

Yes because a tv show has Time to show events happening over the course of 2000 years 😂 cmon dude!

[@mikeylicksit]

the bug isn't dancing, dear, it's struggling for dear life being crushed in your throat soon to be digesting in your stomach. you believe what you want though, dreamer.

[@Werewolf.with.Internet.Access]

“Its desperately fighting to not be consumed by a half wit hobbit, but sure, not Frodo, it’s dancing ya a little jig”

[@frmm123]

My only complaint: Rings of Power has not been skewered enough. It deserves infinitely more punishment, degradation and shame for what it has done to beloved Tolkien. Thank You Disparu, sincerely.

[@AgtX999]

Orks are good people, who could forget the "looks like meats back on the menu boys!" scene where they all pile in, tear apart & eat their own smelly filthy guy raw, giblets flying in the air. Salt of the earth.

[@mnm8818]

They are just hungry and desperate... Don't look down on Orcs but up, as models of oppression, or culture has influenced and peer pressured them to drive hate... Orc love not hate lol if only the other species realise this, Orcs can finally just chill down on a farm and live a peaceful pacifist life This is what's happening to Lotr now... Hehe

[@xiii0722]

Have another like

[@mnm8818]

Wow yt censors discussing Orcs in a fantasy world doing hypothetical comments about middle earth with nothing to do with real world... Clap clap yt what a tool

[@samspurgeon4222]

I was surprised Jackson filmed an Orc PTA meeting as well

[@yaroslavgerzhedovich6064]

So, they think that Galadriel, who lost all her brothers, cousins, half cousins, uncle, half uncle, literally everyone in the battles of Beleriand, may look like THIS? No way.

[@juusovuolle8251]

what makes this scene even funnier is that Elendil took the 7 seeing stones to middle-earth and they used them to spy and communicate between the different strongholds and petty kingdoms. They were originally crafted by Celebrimbors grand father.

[@Hallow_the_fur]

Orks in the books and movies: *meat machines created only for war leeching and poisoning the ground they crawled out of* Orks in ROP: fAmIlY aNd mIsUnDeRsToOd

[@tomgee8211]

They’re supposed to be corrupted elves. So I don’t think they breed like normal humans/halflings, right?

[@Hallow_the_fur]

@@tomgee8211 they were made of mud and stone in mockery to the elves. As for them being created they were basically bred as you would cattle

[@redvenge709]

​@@tomgee8211 They do. Twisted by dark sorcery by Morgoth's lieutenant, the Orcs were cursed in form and soul, their minds further twisted by torture and forced to live in degeneracy. They were shaped and bred to wage war. Sauron later created Uruk Hai, black orcs of greater size but unfortunately had the same weakness to light. Saruman made his own version of Uruk Hai, and was known to crossbreed Men and Orcs. Tolkien himself did state that there were undoubtedly Orc women, but you never see them as Orcs are only ever seen making war. The Peter Jackson films are PG13, so he invented the whole "born from mud" thing to gloss over the (probably) Orc/Man breeding that went on in Isengard in the books.

[@chaiboy854]

​@@redvenge709 i thought orcs were twisted elves. but they had women and bred the way goblins did. Then you have Sauron trying to improve the orcs and created the Uruk. Then Sarumon came along and mixed orc and man to create through magic a new race called uruk-hai. its not described how they are made. peter jackson went with mud bubbles but its the same idea. some kind of twisted magic. So yeah orcs somewhere out in the middle of mordor have villages of women and children. I really dont think they would ever get father of the year the way they are shown in the show. hell they could be like sharks trying to kill each other at birth. We also dont know if they have babies or eggs or how any of that works. just that they are hateful cruel creatures that probably make the lives of their offspring cruel and hard. I just cant see anyone sitting down with tolkeins version of an orc and talking family or weather or even imagine an orc sitting around smoking a pipe contemplating the enemies they slaughtered in battle.

[@The-Mstr-Pook]

They are confusing LOTR Orcs with World of Warcraft Orcs. the latter being their own independent sentient species of grotesque visage. Where is tolken orks are corrupted elves manifestation of evil with no independence that can only exist under the Thrall of a superior being. That's why when Sauron dies many unalive themselves.

[@erichtomanek4739]

Oh Disparu, you'll be fine in Australia. Wok sized spiders only fall from the sky in Spring! and Summer, and Autumn, and maybe a few in Winter ....

[@GH-ub7qz]

the ones that feed the bats, and the ones that eat the bats

[@emceedoctorb3022]

Australia where if it isn’t poisonous it’s venomous.

[@jamie_d0g978]

​@@emceedoctorb3022Or practice MMA

[@MajorSmurf]

Tolkien's plot makes sense, in a well crafted world full to the brim with history, has characters that are fun, interesting or just otherworldly. ROP on the other hand... has characters... it erm... has characters. Yep that's where the praise ends. The fact that the very simple premise that Sauron was being a very sneaky boi is also something they manage to fck up is somehow amazing. Like that's the most simple building block of the second age story and how the rings came about, it also makes sure that every important elf doesn't have less IQ than a carrot.

[@RealJohnnyGuillotine]

Farmer Maggot's Rotten Carrots are better than these elves... Show... Yeah.

[@TheSoonToBePurgedJackMeHoffIV]

It barely has characters

[@aaronblank2318]

RoP has characters? Surely you jest.

[@petriew2018]

i'd challenge even the assertion that is has character. It has people that do whatever the scene needs them to, even if it contradicts what they did in the last scene...

[@MajorSmurf]

@@petriew2018 Well I mean... even a rock can be a character in a story. Doesn't mean that it ever does anything useful or productive or even speaks. Honestly if we dressed rocks in clothes, we might not even notice the difference.

[@leannerose6181]

The worst part for me? The location of where Elrond swam to: The GRAY HAVENS........ what????????

[@christophersmith8316]

The elves came from Valinor ... the US. They know how to spell gray there.

[@CorePathway]

SWINNING IS TIGHT!

[@peachdog1193]

Gray Haven townhomes, I believe rent starting at $1,250 a month

[@LaffeeTaffeeGG]

Next they'll be getting Elendil mixed with Eärendil.

[@jkdbuck7670]

Grey

[@fionnaitsradag5152]

Baby Shelob?! She was a direct descendant of Ungoliant. She wouldn't be a baby by the time Isildur was around.🤨

[@haku8135]

Orcs also don't have wives and babies, you think they even know who Ungoliant is? I doubt they know who SHELOB is!

[@xiii0722]

Yeah... You are most likely right 😅 But then again, from what I know, Celebrimbor would not be an old dude whatsoever. Like galadriel is way older. This show is just... Sigh

[@Coolo52]

This show dont care about timeline in Tolkien's world

[@karachaffee3343]

The bond of an Elven Horse and itsrider is like the bond between a loofa sponge and a sea cucumber...

[@waynehewett4017]

At least the horse can act professionally and is more entertaining to watch .... And is not a narcissistic, entitled, gay, girl boss like all its humanish counterparts that can't act at all .... The only thing holding this crap show together is the horse....

[@k.d.8924]

Ahhh, because the sea is always right. Truly profound.

[@toddkurzbard]

"Rings Of Power" can be described in a simple one-word summary: "Shite".

[@pepincuatro2865]

or "cringe"

[@doOf3r]

Taking bets on which male character will cry in episode 4...

[@alexneff]

And when she says there is a tornado in her

[@Agorax_gg]

Having only watched a bit of season 1 I’d put my money on the gay couple : the size abled and lady Elron. 😂

[@Agorax_gg]

How many men vs women have cried ? I think this info will be hilarious and completely in line with reality 😂

[@xLionsxxSmithyx]

Sauron?

[@big_red01027]

You can't "humanize" an orc. Also, what happened to Elendil's daughter? She aged a decade in two years.

[@maxscherzer9521]

Ozempic

[@XiaoFury]

Truly. That's not the same actress, right? Maybe the show aged her??

[@ComradeCommissarYuri]

“I’ve reached the very highly of my craft!!” Sauron: “last season you didn’t know what an alloy was!!”

[@ymca4547]

I have not seen what you have seen, Disparu. And I have no intention to.

[@marmagd1]

Ages ago, I wrote a university paper about "Lord Of The Rings" and used the word "endearing", when I described the Hobbits. The Prof reprimanded me, because ... "endearing" is a despicable word, because "it suggests that some people/ races are more loveable than others". Never went back to his class and forgot about it - at least in everyday context. But in the last years, this memory came back and hit me over the head with a hammer! Writing´s most important components are intellect and emotions. They seem to train both of them out of people.

[@HardcandyofJustice]

When you hear the female scream at 28:00 and already know she’ll be stunning and brave. Smarter and stronger than Isildur will ever be…

[@cryyc]

That Galadriel moan is going to stay a while lol

[@tonyhudson8235]

It was a difficult wank, but I soldiered on and finally succeeded.

[@Likexner]

I sure hope so.

[@StarStuff.]

Guyladriel moan is the throbbing of ROP

[@jollyroger195]

It also isn't too far fetched for them to have Shelob and Sauron hook up. Especially if they played Shadow of war.

[@Adelina-293]

I'd bet money that scenes already been filmed.

[@tlrlml]

@@Adelina-293 And since this season is one of shipping.... will be shown...

[@jamie_d0g978]

At this point, sauron is the only character relatively interesting or likeable (lmao) and the version of hot shelob was a pretty cool fanfiction character, so I'm not even against it

[@fionnaitsradag5152]

Isildur's horse running across the world and somehow finding him is unintentionally hilarious.🤣

[@haku8135]

Wheel of Time did it so much better. Not the show of course, the books, the proper Wheel of Time.

[@TurinStark5]

Technically it isn’t far fetched as it’s written in the lore although perhaps more of a legend “ it is said in the old tales that where there was great love between men and women and their favorite steeds they could be summoned at need by thought alone.” However I doubt Isildur called him… seems like in this series the horse took the initiative

[@AliceBowie]

It's like running from Portugal to Italy. I don't know if you could get there in a day.

[@AncestorEmpire1]

This torture of a show should have been banned by the Khitomer Accords…….

[@Adelina-293]

Not even the Dominion would force their prisoners to watch ROP.

[@ducttapestuff-jonathan9571]

Pretty sure that Disparu recites "today is a good day to die" just before he watches each episode.

[@GaioSamurai]

6:08 My line is when the spiders are bigger than my hand. Healthy respect for venomous spiders. But if they get bigger than my massive hands, I'm out. I'll be back with a torch (flaming) and a shotgun.

[@redvenge709]

Spiders the size of household pets? Best to burn it all down. I'm sure the insurance company would understand.

[@ashraile]

90%+ of spiders are venomous, they just don't have the bite strength to break human skin...

[@samspurgeon4222]

Best to nuke it from orbit...only way to be sure...

[@georgeray1906]

​@@redvenge709 Also in the case of multiple spiders that are the size of household pets then the best solution is to call in a bombing.

[@lotharrenz4621]

@@georgeray1906 Or move to another planet.

[@hariseldon3786]

Its not amusing, bc the reason there are a whole lot of "rolled "R"s is because Tolkien's whole mythical thesis is based on European and particularly Northen European mythology, philology and linguistics - so, no Chinese or African or Indian looking or talking people... and if the showrunners understood any of this then it would or could be a better series. But, "No" - they have to stamp it with identity politics and "social justice"... completely out of place and out of step with the original material, themes and premises... but they still 'roll their Rs' in pretence - but the thing is - we're not fooled...

[@seefoghall]

Tolkien actually does include other races in Middle Earth, but Amazon race swapped them 😂

[@hariseldon3786]

@@seefoghall Yes - I am aware of the Southern races as an example but they are not lead characters and players... nor are there Black Female Dwarves that are brazenly in the public...

[@mechaman7818]

24:22 I'm pretty sure they just wanted to crib the Bilbo line, "Oh, what business is it of yours what I do with my own things?"

[@Adelina-293]

Ah yes, humanize Orcs. Who are cannon fodder for Morgoth, then Sauron. Tolkien's surely spinning in his grave now.

[@debanydoombringer1385]

I know! They're mindless creatures whose only desire is to kill. That's why the one Sauromon was able to make was so scary. Not only could he travel by daylight. He had intelligence. Limited of course, but still.

[@tlrlml]

At this point, Tolkien is reviving under the supervision of a corax... to get revenge for his one true love.....

[@MatejZizanovic]

@@debanydoombringer1385 This is very untrue. Not only there are orc dialogues in Two Towers where they joke around, share food, even wish for times when the war is over, Tolkien himself explained in a publieshed letter "In stories that seldom if ever see the Orcs except as soldiers of armies in the service of the evil lords we naturally would not learn much about their lives." And orcs definetly reproduced like humans: "For the Orcs had life and multiplied in the manner of the Children of Ilúvatar; and naught that had life of its own, nor the semblance of life, could Melkor ever make since his rebellion in the Ainulindalië before the Beginning: so say the wise" - Silmarillion i honestly dont know where this premise that orcs are some zombies came from?

[@AntediluvianRomance]

Humanizing Orcs could be the only thing this show has done right, if it wasn't done so stupidly.

[@AntediluvianRomance]

​@@MatejZizanovic Tolkien tried out several explanations for the Orcs. One of those is basically "made from mud", and the Jackson movies kinda shifted the perceived canon towards this one.

[@mikemoore4033]

A short guide to Postmodern thought. Moral relativism is tight! Or maybe sh*te. We simply don’t know.

[@Gordulan]

little known fact but Durin Durin is a very influential band of dwarven battle bards that travel around middle earth solving problems and playing hit songs such as "hungry like a warg", "a shrew to a hill" and "invincible".

[@lotharrenz4621]

don't forget "Fighting the World" and "OrcKiller".

[@MajorSmurf]

I just got an ad for ROP -_- Amazon are you trying to get me to burn this world down. I will do it out of pure spite for ROP, don't test me!

[@marychocolatefairy]

I haven't gotten any RoP ads, though I keep seeing people who've said they do. I wonder...is it because I'm a woman? Have any ladies out there been getting RoP ads? It would be funny if they've been mainly aimed at the male user channels, heh.

[@tkps]

I use a you know what for YT. But I still have cable (Australia) where there's only one company. ROP has not only been advertised on so many of its channels for weeks and reminding us to watch S1, it's also being hosted on the front page of it's Home Screen so you can jump straight to Prime from there. That would cost a packet and that's just Australia. How much more are they spending on marketing and why do they think doing so would bring in one extra viewer or new sub after the first season's huge fall off after Ep 2 or 3? Pure panic.

[@sarkastodon30]

2:45 LOTR movie line: "don't go into the forest, no one comes out of there alive." ROP: "I 'member.." 🍇

[@rutgerkerpel306]

Exactly. Fangorn Forest. Ugh... this show is such a disgrace!

[@NeoN-PeoN]

Anytime anyone mentions the Rings of Power, all I can hear is that one chick saying "my gurl Guh LAD ree elllllllll"

[@_Caedwyn]

the celebrimbor in shadow of mordor game was EPIC. his voice, his lines, his character, his style and clothing and fighting and everything else was perfect.

[@davidleblanc7563]

In both games, he was just straight thuggin with Talion, I don't know how i feel about this incarnation of him. It's like they turned him from Brandon Heat from GunGrave into Vincent Kartheisers character from Mad Men.

[@GH-ub7qz]

i never finished the 2d one...lost interest

[@veronicadavanzo2064]

It’s sad when a video game that egregiously breaks canon is miles better than this show. But you’re right; Celebrimbor looked badass in that game. Here he reminds me of Grandma Nutt from Candyland.

[@marychocolatefairy]

@@veronicadavanzo2064 One of the weirder things about the show is how they actually cast a younger and more elf-looking dude (Tom Budge), filmed a couple eps with him, fired him, cast this middle aged guy, and refilmed those couple eps. The only reason that's been given is that they wanted to go in a different direction for the character. What, a less canon direction?

[@tkps]

@@marychocolatefairy It's like they've deliberately made the elves the least like Tolkien's descriptions as it's possible to do. They are meant to be ethereal and majestic. I thought Hugo Weaving's Elrond was about as 'grizzled' as they should look. This lot don't resemble elves at all.

[@pappabunny]

Time in this show is definitely wibbly wobbly. I can't wait for Sauron to pin a celery stalk to his tunic and make a dash for the Tardis.

[@Theymond]

I submitted a review on Amazon for ROP and they said they'd review it and it could take 2-3 days. LOL.

[@aguywhocanfly1335]

So they're gonna review your review? Can we review their reviews of our reviews too?

[@tommyservo9660]

10:58 - Tell me, what would have happened if someone would have smacked Queen Elizabeth like that?

[@CalebePriester]

Off with their head?

[@gagatube]

Arrest, confinement in the Tower of London and then years and years of negotiations and debate about a beheading.

[@Chester_Grimm]

Can we send Hollywood to Canada now?

[@ReformedSauron]

Canada has suffered enough.

[@TheSoonToBePurgedJackMeHoffIV]

Lol are you slow? Canada is almost worse than California

[@DrWackySanchez]

Fluff off, we're full

[@KitsuneAdorable]

If we don't want Justin Beiber why would we Hollywood?

[@rackroll4405]

This show is going to be filmed their next year.

[@Educated2Extinction]

I hope the showrunners follow up "I can write better than Tolkien." with " I can win as a UFC fighter." I'd watch that.

[@benwarwick4290]

Damn they did shelob dirty too. Now she got a losing streak of 3 half men 😂😂😂

[@AHille444]

4:13 Did Isildor just assume that horses gender pronouns!?!?! "My Boy" Slavery and Bigotry!!!

[@omacronprime8076]

Gawd I just can't over the elves being sofa king ugly.

[@grokeffer6226]

True. They're supposed to be really good looking. Some of these guys look like vampires.

[@dris007]

@@grokeffer6226I’d say vampires actually look hot, none of the elves look genuinely attractive

[@mnm8818]

Think in episode 2 there's 2 elves (female and male) with the elven king that are the only 2 that look elvish besides Galadriel... The rest look like humans are impersonating elves, which they are but...

[@Clearlyclynn]

@@mnm8818guyladriel certainly doesn’t look elvish. She is discount Galadriel along with all their ear prosthetics. It’s like the prop team went to party city or spirit Halloween for their ears.

[@dris007]

@@Clearlyclynn the make up team and effects teams didn’t even try to make them look ethereal at all, they just gave them pointy ears and called it a day

[@sethkaicer319]

Disparu and I adopted an orc and named him mork.👺👹☠️😎

[@skyevens8756]

Plot twist Mindy is a horse.

[@tlrlml]

@@skyevens8756 Your knowledge of the lore is deep.

[@skyevens8756]

@tlrlml you have no idea my padawon.

[@FierceMusic]

Or was it Gork?

[@michaelmunika5864]

And he enjoys some porrrk.

[@UnknownHC]

39:31 I demand my "I became a total slag" clip!

[@JackoBlades]

Combine it with the guyladriel moan

[@jamesmetcalf5597]

The horse ran off because it saw the LOTR trilogy.

[@m-el1880]

so "baby Shelob"... hmmm... Shelob is probably the last direct daughter of Ungoliant, so she is extremely old... but I understand, they don't know Tolkien, haven't read his books and seen the movies while delirious during a cocaine party, so every spider is actually a shelob to them

[@ilovecats9336]

They haven’t the foggiest idea what they are doing.

[@AliceBowie]

Either they don't know or don't understand the timeline of events, or they just don't care. Probably both.

[@m-el1880]

@@AliceBowie Time in this show seems like only a few days have passed between events but it doesn't matter, nothing in this show matters, it's just a bad fanfic created not by fans but by activists

[@paul2k2b21]

The orc baby mum and dad ended it for me. What an absolute corruption of Tolkien work. I can understand why tolkiens family were so against selling the rights for so long now

[@nadw2354]

It’s funny however if they sold the rights decades ago the story would have been made by super fans and would more likely than not be good

[@debanydoombringer1385]

​@@nadw2354​ Oh, you think so? The rights were partially sold during his lifetime. The animated movie and Tom show came of it. He hated them. "Super fans" at the time we're hippies that dressed up like Hobbits, which he also hated.

[@tlrlml]

Ya, they hesitated until they found the people who would most corrupt it... and then gave them just enough rope, but not to much, to make it happen!!!

[@MatejZizanovic]

That scene is actually lore accurate. IDK what yall have been smoking and reading... Orcs had families and reproduced like humans. And in Two Towers, two orcs Shahrat and Gorbag have a dialogue where they talk about how life will be easier after the war, and even contemplate escaping from the big boss.... IDK where yall got this idea that orcs are some zombies that spawn in mud. First of all they cant just spawn, cause evil cant create - thats one of the main themes of Silmarillion.

[@jaconorth2098]

If evil cannot create then they cannot reproduce?

[@Kross415]

You trying to roll your R with your throat instead of your tongue is surprisingly funny 🤣

[@MantismanTM]

Bruh... The orcs being humanized is a WRONG creative choice... Immersion breaking. Annatar calling Celebrimbor "The Lord of the Rings." Celebrimbor manipulates himself to give himself and Sauron "space".... Lvl 11 cringe.

[@danbal4185]

The timeline is already a mess in the context of the show, in the context of the lore is demented. The world building and the geography is pure nonsense. The hubris of these people of setting the story in the second age when in reality it's just a clumsy attempt to make an "unofficial" prequel to P.Jackson's films. Pathetic.

[@tlrlml]

It's not even at the level of a prequal to the movies at this point... and I suspect they never even tried... The intent seems to have always been the rewriting of not only LOTR (the books and movies) but the entire lore, letters, and geography. Frankly, I'm surprised they didn't go further back, to before the creation of the Valar, so that the rewrite would be total and complete!

[@marychocolatefairy]

@@tlrlml The showrunners did actually pitch this as an extended epic based on PJ's prologue. They're film fans, not books fans, after all. Their problem, however, was that by order of the estate they're not *supposed* to be basing this on the films. So they went to Tolkiens' writings to grab certain details. They did basically rewrite LOTR as you say, and they used excerpts from the letters and other things to defend their bad choices- which is pretty disrespectful of Tolkien right there, eh?.

[@danbal4185]

@@tlrlml i can't wait to see Female Eru and Black Manwe.

[@tkps]

@@marychocolatefairy They may refer to them when telling us why they made certain choices but they don't have the right to use what's written in any letter. Just LotR and the Hobbit, that's it. But then 16 pages of appendices doesn't get you much so you fill in the blanks with your own terrible plot proving they can't touch Tolkien's talent with the proverbial barge pole.

[@dbf1dware]

Finally! I get my Disparu fix.

[@Fauxkerykes]

All these "Elves" are kinda ugly. None of them are beautiful and magnanimous as Tolkien's lore describes. The ones who are evil are that way because the heroes made them that way. It's not their fault - typical Disney in Hollywood. Villains can't be evil just because they're evil anymore. They always have to have some kind of tragic backstory or be forced to be evil because "insert any modern bullshit". I really loathe this shit so much.

[@shaunwhitehead1485]

0:13 WTF elves are meant to look beautiful and elegant, he looks old and used

[@haku8135]

All the elves look fucking shit. Like they specifically picked the least attractive men to be Elves of all things.

[@Mick-zi2pj]

I love cele Brimbor talking bout reaching the height of his craft and it being his moment seems like the same reasons the actor agreed to appear in the show 😅😅😅

[@peregrination3643]

"Elrond wouldn't have said something so nice about me." Most human moment in the show to date. Someone wrote something that would be natural in a sitcom or FNT. Let's applaud this moment. It may not come again.

[@jamie_d0g978]

They are probably the only likeable and semi interesting characters in the first season alongside Adar and Sauron (sometimes)

[@MA-ho5hd]

Thanks for reviewing this, Disparu. Watching people such as yourself deservedly rip this trash apart is my new form of entertainment. Back in the day, my entertainment came from the show itself. How far we've fallen.

[@TheLmoney420]

35:47 “Send him somewhere with a sword!!!” 🤣

[@miqvPL]

ok I will go to sleep 50 minutes later than I planned

[@xiii0722]

Same

[@gabrielcruz6752]

19:45 Amªzn is destroying the character of Celebrimbor for the sake of an idiotic plot (forcing Galadriel into a leading role and a contrived dynamic with Sauron) in such a slow and painfully degrading way that the actual description of the tortur3 and ªssasination of Celebrimbor in the book of Unfinished Tales looks like a merciful killing in comparison.

[@GenuineLhachwen]

I heard baby Shelob's middle name was 'Likegrogu' but that's strictly hearsay. EDIT: Is it just me, or does Calabrimbor's outfit look like a raucous gospel singer's robes?

[@yagimii]

I think a lot of movies now a days forget about the SUSPENSION OF BELIEF. nothing is watchable because it's tumbler fan fiction.

[@iturnedintoamartian-cm6nd]

Because it's hard to believe they made such a bad show 😆

[@AKUJIVALDO]

@​iturnedintoamartian-cm6nd it is not hard at all, evidence is in your face all the time...

[@ShadyCrypt]

How the fuck did she manage to stab Isildur with a kitchen knife? Did the show forget that his slightly metallic looking sweater was supposed to be armor?

[@calvinginn1637]

Celebrimbor saying he has mastered his craft when, in season 1, he never knew how to make a basic alloy until then

[@erichtomanek4739]

The colours of Numenor are White and Red? Like the Sydney Swans!? No wonder the place sank below the waves!

[@Laarye]

Wait... so the horse that has a bond so deep with it's rider that it won't leave him behind, just lets a stranger get on him and ride off...? What happened to the bond?

[@nickdirienzo2849]

Wouldn't every spider in said "den" need to be destroyed for Shelob to be the only of her kind? If what we see here is true giant demon spiders should have long taken over Middle Earth... 😵🤮🤣

[@FortisConscius]

But it was cool in Harry Potter so here it is. Repurposed.

[@DeadlyPlatypus]

2:00 Orcs just want to grill!...man-flesh. 17:34 You got there!

[@somedandy7694]

Pretty sure Shelob never got wounded. Not even elven blades could scratch her armor. The book never describes her as having scarred eyes.

[@tlrlml]

I'm sure Tolkien just forgot to put that in...

[@FortisConscius]

@@tlrlml Something he "overlooked".

[@p2pirate534]

Tolkien would rather be dug up and reanimated as a skeleton by a witch I found on tumblr. Than be forced to watch that scene with the orc family and baby.

[@andrewbarbarash3116]

Forgetting all the lore breaking stuff, they have multiple stories going on that are drawn out, predictable and utterly uninteresting because the characters are just... Meh. I can mentally dismiss this show as being canon, so I'll admit I'm enjoying Sauron's story arc.. even though it's kinda bollocks too. So basically 2/3s of this show is instant fast forward material.

[@marychocolatefairy]

Wooo, Team Sauron! I've long maintained the show would be exponentially improved by going all in and making him the hero, lol. Also, I've actually become a fan of his actor. I checked him out in the Medici show, since I wanted to see what he was like in quality material, and he was as good as anyone else in the cast (which included Sean Bean as his uncle). Too bad he's saddled with this for now.

[@bloodrunsclear]

'A primordial taking the shape of a gigantic spider. She was initially an ally of Melkor in Aman.' - A description of Shelob/Ungoliant So no...Shelob was never a 'baby'. She manifested as a big spider right off the bat.

[@360lootgoon3]

20:00 When it comes to forging the rings, Amazon apparently forgot its own lore from just the end of last season. For the elven rings, Celebrimbor said “to make the alloy, I need gold and silver of the most exquisite quality, I need gold and silver, from Valinorrrrrrrr”, which is why Guyladriel had to give up the dagger. But I guess for the Dwarves, any old junk will do. “Hey, hand me that rusted hunk of iron over there in the corner, gotta make me some evil magic rings!” Lolz.

[@dimerost]

Thank you for watching this and describing it so I don't have to fulfill my morbid curiosity and give this show a view. You've saved me from subverting my love of Tolkien.

[@DutchDread]

"the black forest, no one gets out of there alive" random coincidence, I am playing FFIX while watching this and am currently stranding in "evil forest" where also, famously, "no one gets out alive"

[@alexneff]

African American forest

[@Combatgoblin83]

I watched the first 2 minutes of se1 ep1 snd quit but I’ve watched every single episode of your reviews 😂

[@AustinJD84]

Disney funding YT degenerates

[@miyoko_17]

If Berek 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙝𝙤𝙬 is the ancestor of Brego (The Rohan 🐎 that finds Aragorn)...I will lose it 😤😂 It's more a rhetorical than anything else...but Rangs of Power does know that it DOESN'T have ANY rights to the Peter Jackson LOTRs right?? 😅 That's not the IP you have access to, why do they keep ripping of PJs LOTR movies??!

[@muppet-fan]

It is so massively annoying!

[@bysigmar3819]

this show is pure insanity. its like 5 people writing an episode without talking to each other ever

[@michealbohmer2871]

Giant Eagles can speak. Therefore, the scene with Pharazôn doesn't work.

[@chriss3276]

Given how bad the dialog is in this show we are probably better off with them not speaking! But the scene doesn't "work" because the Great Eagles are the messengers of Manwe who the Numenoreans had turned their backs on (on all the Valar) which was the cause of their estrangement with the Elves.

[@debelmeis2311]

Orcs were never humanized by Tolkien

[@brjohow]

The story begins with Han Solo navigating the Millennium Falcon through a sudden wormhole that leads through Mordor only to crash into the USS Enterprise on the way down to earth. The USS Enterprise is captained by a swaggering James T. Kirk. They find themselves stranded on a desert section of earth, instantly recognizable as a vast, sand-covered wasteland. As tensions rise over whose ship is superior, Duncan Idaho strides in, inviting them to join an underworld spice operation which for no reason is happening on the sahara desert. Just as the unlikely trio debates their next move, a portal opens, and Dr. Who emerges alongside Indiana Jones, who is wielding a suspiciously familiar glowing sword. Indy insists they need to stop Sauron, who’s plotting to combine the One Ring with advanced alien tech to create an unstoppable weapon. Meanwhile, MacGyver, who shows up at this precise moment, disassembles Indy’s newfound weapon to craft a quick escape device. Amidst this chaos, Jon Snow rides in on a snarling alien-predator hybrid creature, breathlessly informing the group that the Night King and a Terminator have joined forces to conquer the multiverse using cybernetic dragons. Things escalate further when a Predator, enhanced with Borg technology, ambushes them, only to be swiftly dispatched by The Witcher, who casually mentions he's been trained by Neo at a certain magic-cybernetic fusion academy. The ragtag team eventually learns that all of reality is folding into itself and colliding various timelines due to a mysterious force trying to rewrite reality itself. Their mission takes them to a flying taxi from a bustling metropolis, where they discover Doc Brown and Leeloo tinkering with a DeLorean powered by rare spices from the desert. The grand finale is a visually chaotic battle, with Max racing through the desert in his War Rig, evading giant worms while being chased by alien mercenaries. In the climax, the heroes combine an assortment of legendary artifacts to create a superweapon that, when activated, resets the reality before the folding started. Rick Deckard, arriving in the final moments, delivers a profound yet confusing monologue that seems intended to tie everything together. The day is saved, but not without a lingering sense that the chaos might start anew, hinted by a teaser showing an incongruous alliance of iconic characters gathering in the shadows lead by The Mule.

[@lotharrenz4621]

beautiful. you should write the next season.

[@brjohow]

@@lotharrenz4621 honestly, a brutal goofball beerfest style mashup would probably be better billion dollar rangz of power.

[@lotharrenz4621]

@@brjohow cheaper, and just more entertaining on a popcorn level.