Rise of Kong's Platinum Is SO BAD It's Almost UNPLAYABLE

[@Dimisiano]

This game was like these goffy ads with level 1 crook to level 100 mafia boss

[@Satiire]

That is the best description of this game 😭

[@blazinghero3765]

@@Satiire Nah the add is that one game with the gorilla's, were you eat banana's and banana tree. but any time progress is made, you just do a stupid and go back to smol monkey.

[@od1401]

Man I forgot about those, and I was happy to forget

[@Dimisiano]

@@od1401 well i am happy that I made u remember those

[@Jargon.5]

I can't believe how accurate this is

[@simonlam5381]

Honestly the biggest offence of this game isn't even the awful level design or boring combat or anything like that. The biggest offence is that they dared to make a freaking king kong game and then make him like 2 meters tall and not like 200!

[@FlamesAnimations]

Honestly i think he might be pretty tall, its the perspective. Not defending the game by any means but everything on skull island is big so in perspective he looks small!

[@InZiDes]

Obviously it's King Kong. But it doesn't say King Kong anywhere. It's called Skull Island: Rise of Kong. Kong is the name of the species of monkeys. And it just says that we are a young monkey.

[@christiancinnabars1402]

@InZiDes The main Kong in the game is already the same size as his parents the moment he becomes playable, and you can see him dwarfing the human skeletons you see in the spider area. He is 100% adult sized. Him looking so small is the fault of perspective. They zoom the camera _way_ out and have him be dwarfed by all the trees in the environment. Like, the tallest trees you see in the game _have_ to be nearing 600+ feet tall for no reason. I get making the enemy bosses large to have them be more intimidating, but what do you achieve from making the _plants_ that big?

[@skyshunts]

Ikr

[@rexyjp1237]

The largest version of kong is 102 meters tall, not 200.

[@SayberPlays]

"We are awoken by a purely silent noise" 😂😂Somehow you turned this mess of a game into a funny experience

[@Satiire]

Appreciate you checking the video out man, I'm glad you enjoyed! The game was full of random cutscenes like that, I don't really get their purpose 🤣

[@SayberPlays]

@@Satiire 😂😂

[@PlatinumROB_91]

I can't believe that we were blessed with 2 true GOTY contenders this year. Who'd have thought Gollum would get this level of completion, it is truly incredible! On a serious note, another top quality video!

[@Satiire]

Appreciate you checking this out as always Rob! Gollum has some serious competition now but I do think Gollum is slightly better, therefore kong wins as worst game of the year for me 👀

[@Strix2031]

We started this year with Forspoken(Mid) and ended it with Rise of Kong(Extremely bad),it was the bad games marathon.

[@Its_me_6]

The Kong looks like they're made out of clay in this game, which would have been cool if it was a purposeful design choice and not a terrible model.

[@johannesseyfried7933]

"We actually wanted to make a video game about a golem, you know those living monsters of clay, but he turned out looking more like King Kong.

[@ildathet]

@@johannesseyfried7933 More like "Hey, can you make a game in one year ? Well we have a POC game about a golem, not a titanic gorilla"

[@EdenKarnstein]

21:32 This feels like an elaborate shitpost, Kong getting a T-Rex in a chokehold and snapping her neck like he’s doing a takedown in a stealth game

[@draconis17]

ngl, you're the first person I've seen to actually fight the crab boss as intended. Usually they realize you can just stand on the higher areas on the sides and the boss can't get to you. Then you just chuck rocks at it until it dies.

[@Satiire]

I've seen a few people do that actually but I didn't realise that was even possible while making this video 🤣

[@milkmonstrosity]

Ape use big brain to kill big crab with big rock

[@jeremyallen5974]

Trophy unlocked: 'Vincible

[@hewhobattles8869]

5:35 Adding the Squidward walking sound effects is unironically an improvement to this game

[@brokenbandit9018]

Did not expect the trophies for this to work in the first place for you. Great work!

[@Satiire]

That was one of my concerns going into the game actually 😭 I'm glad it all worked out in the end though!

[@wadedevinney9681]

One big flaw with this game that I don't see many people talking about [he said in a video where the top comment talks about it] is that if I'm playing as Kong, I want to feel like I'm controlling a massive behemoth, not an average sized silverback gorilla. I want to swing around trees that are smaller than I am, maybe be able to uproot one and use it like a club. I want one my few advantages over a boss to be my massive size. I want to be the biggest goddamn thing in the jungle.

[@cryptosporidium01]

Peter Jackson's King Kong did it so well. And that was a canon with a smaller Kong itonically

[@lordhighwind6230]

The biggest flaw with this game is that it’s a game

[@cherry9787]

Honestly, the game doesn't look awful as a proof of concept with placeholder graphics. But this does look like the team literally JUST made the basics and some executive came in and said "It's playable? Good enough!"

[@scottdixon2505]

I think that's exactly what it was. They were only given a year to make it so this was probably the proof of concept and the publisher was just like 'nah that's fine, publish it'

[@Satiire]

Yeah I would say that's the case too. Gamemill entertainment have been a content farm for ages, they just released an avatar game that flopped and they're also working on a walking dead game that doesn't look too good either 😅

[@S1ayer585.]

The game also being called “rise of Kong” also doesn’t fit, the mutated Dino creatures in the game also look nothing like skull island creatures and look like those other dinosaurs from 48 (or 49 idk forgot the move)

[@tomatogenesis]

​@@S1ayer585.Sadly one of them even happens to be Malusaurus, the latest early concept art ever made for the Indominus Rex before, well, it became the Indominus Rex. They didn't even try to hide it at all, they simply stole it, slapped in a paint job and then called it a day.

[@S1ayer585.]

@@tomatogenesis LOL I just realized after I made this comment

[@MICHEALKARLIS]

Respect to the devs for implementing such a heartfelt story. 😂 Dude, the biggest congratulations on getting this horrible game completed! Another banger of a video, treat yourself with a good game for the next upload haha. 🏆 I swear the game punished you for glitching your way through the collectibles. 😅

[@Satiire]

One of the best story's ever, I really enjoyed the Black and white slideshow 😊 Next game has been difficult so far but I'm enjoying it at the same time! Far better than Kong that's for sure but im glad you enjoyed the video bro! Thank you! And what can I say, the glitch presented itself and I had to see it through 😎

[@Jargon.5]

Truly one of the games of all time

[@BrokeAsAJokeSlots]

Game of games

[@MrTrueCaller619]

I disagree, it's way less than that.

[@Jargon.5]

@@MrTrueCaller619 it's just a meme bro, sit down

[@AnarchicIdealist]

Definitely changed gaming history forever

[@Satiire]

Couldn't agree more bro 🫡

[@moonlightrobbery]

You know, a coming of age revenge story about a being who is the last of his kind sounds pretty boss. Maybe if the developers had more time (and money), they could've done justice to it.

[@Ixarus6713]

Gave me huge Maneater vibes. Except that game is actually complete. 😂

[@GameGodZERO]

yeah the story could have been pretty good if the game didn't look and play horribly XD

[@christiancinnabars1402]

They definitely nailed the bosses you would expect to fight in a Skull Island game: • Worm • Crab • Three reskinned early game enemies • Spider • One, large version of the reskinned early game enemy Truly one of the boss line-ups of all time.

[@GriffinatorOriginal]

It’s hilarious how quick they had that “guys we only had a year to work on the game!” Excuse ready for this one.

[@matthewburley9872]

I don't view it as an excuse, it was apparent from looking at it, especially from all the default/stock assets. I wish the publishers actually cared about the games they made instead of just making money as I can see some potential in some parts, just... they had no time

[@octolockg5059]

Publisher needs to be sued. That's just absurd.

[@elvickRULES]

@@matthewburley9872the Nickelodeon Kart racers from the publisher aren’t bad.

[@Thund3rDrag0n12]

​@@elvickRULESbecause nickelodeon actually has some level of quality control. This publisher seems to be keen on releasing barely-playable games and hoping they make money off the hype and marketing alone

[@IamBardsongWolf]

I mean Nintendo made Scarlet/Violet and they had a much longer time and much bigger budget and it still was just as broken as this game lol.

[@robbylebotha]

Reminds me of 1999 PS1 demo games that came free with gaming magazines. Im assuming there are no developer credits roll at the end. Imagine being the guy that built this and going to a job interview.

[@legionbeast]

I think one of the things that sucks the most is that there is everything present for a decent Kong game. I mean they have combat tactics, finishing grapples, collectables, upgrade trees, and a somewhat "open world", but it's all bare bones and barely functional with only the most basic implementation.

[@Taylor_slayss]

GameMill

[@prophet3akagenius631]

This game is makes king kong on PS2 look like a modern AAA game lol

[@MayorHairBear]

Bruh is a special kind of human for punishing himself self consistently for our entertainment. What a legend!

[@Satiire]

Always has to be done! The next bad game is coming soon and will pop up out of nowhere to surprise us all (I will be doing it) 😎

[@talankirk6944]

No player icon on the map is astoundingly bad. Wow.

[@RickDaSquirrel]

The collectibles one is horrendous. But I think you helped me find the last two. The one in the swamp where you found the hole and the 5th level in the sand. But I don’t know how to get there lol

[@Satiire]

Yeah it's really annoying, the sand one is just a trial and error thing to be honest 😭 I think I climbed up the rocks in the middle

[@RickDaSquirrel]

@@SatiireWell I found it. Finally got the platinum. It was painful.

[@buriedyoux7393]

Hey can you please tell me if you can revisit ALL areas after you best the last boss? I defeated him and have been running back through for my 2 last collectibles. But I feel like I'm running in circles and find nothing between caverns and waterfall valley... idk where these last 2 could be!

[@sshhrroomm]

absolutely love your channel, ive binged almost all your videos, keep up the great work!!

[@Satiire]

Thank you so much! I appreciate you checking all of them out and I'll keep up the great work forever 🫡

[@SamsarasArt]

This dude actually completed this dumpster fire. You have way more patience than me.

[@PatchworkRose567]

I can definitely see where they were going with the art style of mimicking a kind of comic book/graphic novel style but it fails for several obvious reasons. It is strangely charming seeing a resurgence in poorly made movie and show tie in games, it takes me back to the late 2000s, early 2010s.

[@chadgorosaurus4898]

The only good thing this game did is how they brought back Gaw (a very obscure villain that appeared in a Kong novel)

[@hwimystic7691]

Seeing Kong run sped up had me laughing 🤣

[@joshuatealeaves]

Being a fan of your Gollum video I was waiting on this. You’re a mad man 🤝

[@Satiire]

Thank you for sticking around! I knew I had to get this one done since I grabbed Gollum's platinum! Roll on the next bad game 👀

[@melon8151]

game of the decade for sure, Good Video like allway love it. Keep it Up

[@Satiire]

Thank you for watching as always! 🙏 Kong has to be the best game of all time. I'm sure it will outsell Minecraft at some point!

[@Zohard104]

What’s sad about this game is I think King Kong would make a great video game obviously with loving care of the main driving force. This game is not that.

[@D4rkKn1ght311]

I got the same glitch as you, after my game crashed twice to the spider boss all my skillpoints were gone. Truly a Gollum-like. 10/10 Amazing 👍

[@Satiire]

Has to be one of the best games ever made for sure!

[@El_FzEq]

The sound effect for unlocking an achievement sounds like a cue in a horror game when the enemy discovers you. But I guess unlocking any achievement in this game means you've gone through unspeakable horrors lol thank you so much for completing this dumpster fire. Subbed!

[@christiancinnabars1402]

12:25 That's a Carnotaur, not a T. rex. You can tell, because of the the horns and shortened snout, as well as the fact that this game 100% would have made it a full on boss if it were a T. rex.

[@ogbobbyjohnson7311]

Dinomaxxing

[@themug406]

How is that a fact

[@fictthecreator7083]

Wait wait wait, so you’re telling me that this game gives you the absolutely banger setup of playing as mama Kong who has to save her kid from a dinosaur, and then…just…uses that as tutorial backstory?! Come on, game, you had ONE good idea and you wasted it!

[@Outside998]

What annoys me the most about the game is that in real life, Gorillas have some of the most extreme cases of sexual dimorphism in mammals, yet the mother and father of Kong look exactly the same.

[@Daralexen]

I accidentally beat the game today by just wandering into the final boss arena. I did not even know about levels 3 and 4. My PS5 says that I only have 2 hours of playtime, but it felt more like 20 hours than just 2. A patch was also added to add a map icon for Kong.

[@Yakonsupremacy]

Charging 33 for this, is like going 70 km/h in a school zone

[@craigbolton2231]

The king Kong game based off the movie both looks and plays better than this and that was what? 15 years ago? Kinda wanna play it now

[@colbyvi]

glad this game is getting the attention it deserves😁 W vid

[@Satiire]

For sure, such a niche game and I'm glad I could put more eyes on it 🫡

[@MarkoRose_]

Did this game even have any marketing at all? I didn’t even know it was a thing 💀. Great video though man as always.

[@Satiire]

The only marketing it had was from people saying it would beat gollum at worst game of the year 🤣 Appreciate you checking the video out as always bro!

[@GaspardTheGrey]

Damn the videos keep getting better despite the games 😆 great stuff as always mate!

[@Satiire]

Thank you bro! Always got to experience the best games 🤣 Glad you enjoyed it though!

[@grimreaper6060]

Gollum, Kong on Skull Island and The Walking Dead Destinies... The trinity of the worst games from 2023.

[@dudu_tuga_2002]

Let's goooooo my bro, plating GOTYs !!! Keep up with this games fr

[@Satiire]

Can't wait to see what next year brings, GOTY choices about to be stacked fr 👀

[@darrenarchibald5238]

I personally am a fan of the art style but watching you trophy guys play this game has been quite the laugh

[@mogueraguh]

I’ve had massive respect for King Kong since the 30s the fact that they were able to make this mess is a crime

[@Shadovox]

How old are you?!

[@Deathroff]

Really sold me on this game dude! Gonna ask for it this Christmas🤪

[@matiastarvainen7523]

A huge amount of respect for doing the last achievement. I would have quit at that point. no way I would have played that game again

[@teamrocketjoe1621]

This Kong looks like one of those knock-off action figures you see at a Mexican flea market.

[@MTM_Draws]

“Remember… Funky’s the monkey!” - Funky Kong

[@elvickRULES]

I’m planning to do 12 bad plats/games next year and this is one: wish me luck. There’s some stuff that will be useful in this for me. Just need to get this cheap.

[@Satiire]

It was very cheap on Black Friday but I recommend trying to get a second hand physical copy Good luck 🫡🫡

[@elitereptilian200]

the cutscene fights in this game are just pure perfection!!!

[@Scarletdex8299]

I don't know where to put this, so I'll do it here. Imagine if there was one more stage. Where Kong finds a humans camp near the old crashed B-29. Enemies are the remnants of plane crew wearing tattered USAF uniform attacking with knives, makeshift clubs and pre-installed booby traps. The boss would be some beefhead sergeant with a machine gun and enough strength to wrestle Kong 1v1.

[@perjalananwaktu7181]

the whole budget went to the subtitles

[@Olsukan]

I can respect going through this just to have plat I could never props

[@FoolishLemur]

This achievement is the only one that deserves to be called an achievement. The endeavours this man had to go through 😢

[@HangmanOfficialUploads]

Love that I've seen like 3 different KZbinrs get stuck on the exact same rock vines bit.

[@itsmedadden]

Goodjob for enduring this when I seen the map I would've gave up 😅

[@XenoTronusWeePoo850]

Peter Jackson's King Kong deserves a remaster and a damn trophy pack so i can have my childhood game in my trophy

[@supermaximglitchy1]

21:13 long live the queen

[@SANDREZZ]

1:03 LOL - Can't believe you actually played this 💩

[@Satiire]

Thanks for checking it out bro! Rise of Kong is GOTY 🫡

[@darksydeernie]

So after beating Gaw you had to restart the game on a fresh file? No New Game + or bonus or anything?

[@Satiire]

You get a "post game" but because my skill points were bugged, I had no choice but to restart from a fresh save and go again

[@thegalacticfederation1212]

Gamemill always been pumping out perfectly functioning games, even before they published Big Rigs Racing

[@damoclesxiv2292]

Can someone please do a collectible guide on this game, I'm missing two skulls and have no idea where they are haha

[@CaffeineDeprivation]

3:13 I can never get over the fact that baby Kong looks like he's about to sneeze here Like, I KNOW he's supposed to be crying. But his expression is just-

[@grounded-jump0]

great video I already know bro[I do know because I watched in 20x speed] this game looks stunning 😍

[@Satiire]

Bro you're so far behind now, they just released 40x speed so you can watch the video almost instantly now On a real, appreciate you watching as always grounded 🫡

[@TheLaLeeee]

I understand this "game" probably broke your mind, but I would've loved to see a TWD Destinies platinum video before you retire.

[@Satiire]

It's 100% on the way! Just finishing up the current video and then it's TWD time 😎

[@GemsOfRedditStudios]

11:50 tue masterpiece 🙏🏼

[@jefferythibodeaux5573]

You poor man, I’m sorry you went through this

[@Satiire]

It had to be done 🤣

[@ConnorGarrett]

Bruh... I swear if this wins GOTY I will eat my own socks.

[@Satiire]

Be prepared to eat your own socks

[@Speedingv3]

as a decent good Skyrim author & a noob dev! i can say this is the best game ever made!! no joke !

[@cukuwruums_306]

4:14 don’t mind me, just leaving a personalised replay button for myself

[@tylern6420]

The screenshake is roblox levels of quality

[@robxholicfoxyfan8552]

I also liked FNAF Ruin and Cassette Beasts, and Mario Wonder is fun as hell. I saw another video on Kong, though, and if this was an indie dev or very, very small team I'd have more sympathy but it seems like it isn't that disadvantaged and looks pretty rough ngl. Granted, it's always the rushing from the higher ups that don't understand patience or anything about programming whatsoever that call the shots. It's hilarious though because unpolished things are funny to me. The bare bones part looks unfun to play, though, despite how funny it is to watch this game implode on itself. Not seeing yourself on a map is also a putrid flaw that even the most basic of higher ups should know by now is elementary for a game and should be allowed to be completed even if they are trying to crap out a game that's unfinished as this.

[@JadeAnnabelArt]

At least the audio was better than it was originally. At release, the narrator sounded like she was talking through a grainy xbox mic.

[@bombchop]

Absolutely awesome, both game & video Seriously, hats off to you mate for persisting with this absolutely trash game. Video, editing and style was on point but my god thanks for showing me every reason never to buy this game

[@Satiire]

Thank you as always bro! It was a tough one to platinum without a guide but I'm so glad it's over! I'd recommend any other game before this one, even gollum. I really hope this bad game trend dies out because too many games are releasing like this 🤣

[@lasthopelost9090]

that final boss neck snap was so unsatisfying especially after fighting him with just fists

[@elvickRULES]

That’s how it killed Kong’s mom or dad though so it’s a full circle thing

[@shadowinthedark0893]

I'm so sorry that you had to experience all that

[@Satiire]

I had the best time of my life 😊

[@MazeMaker4Life]

At this point, it's pretty clear which games satiire loves to plat ;)

[@Satiire]

I love these games, can't wait for the next one to come out in a few months 😏

[@EmilAhvenainen]

Like a wise man once said: "Never go full kong".

[@waffletop1018]

nah why does Gaw look like if ark made tristar godzilla

[@RobloxDeadzoneHacks]

You should make more videos like this

[@obambagaming1467]

Remember guys, this was released in 2023

[@Kosz_D_Pablo]

The intro cinematic is literally a fucking dark souls opening.

[@fourthknower9831]

apparently the publisher is the same that brought Big Rig into existence

[@jackhazardous4008]

3 hit combo was the MVP

[@jpanda79]

I like how gollum like is now a game category

[@Nicolas.Lattanzi]

You should've recorded every time you grabbed a collectible so you would be the only human being making a Collectible Guide 😏

[@Satiire]

I thought about it but I hoped someone else would end up making one 🤣

[@Nicolas.Lattanzi]

@@Satiire You know, if this game would receive a patch solving many glitches and the map system, I'd give it a try because sometimes I like playing meme games, but not like this.

[@VLikaru]

Expecting the avatar game trophy rundown

[@Satiire]

Are we talking about quest for balance or the new avatar game from ubisoft?

[@Akursedtime]

Can you imagine this game on the Switch. Janky and glitchy af.

[@DarkAnomaly]

My sincere sympathies for playing this game to the end 🤣🤣

[@borrisg4972]

First punch: "Killer Combo!" Second punch: "Blaster Combo!" Third punch: "ULTRAAAA COMBOOO!"

[@EmpireGamingWynter]

Not gonna lie if it ends up being a freebie on PS+ I will probably get it just to experience its majesty myself personally 😅

[@S0ulGh0st]

12:25 that looks more like a carnotaurus than a t-rex. And OMG The trophy name puns are bad...

[@BT_UGO]

This game is a masterpiece definitely buying this one and doing multiple playthroughs

[@brycevo]

A remake of the Peter Jackson game would have been so much better

[@FrogThatVibes]

The first narration feels like they got inspired by Borderlands

[@desaun]

I just found your channel and I am so sorry you had to suffer through this beautiful masterpiece of a game. 😂

[@Satiire]

Glad to have you on board 🫡 The game was horrible but has to be GOTY!

[@BoomNoBastic]

I feel for the developers though. GameMill is a notoriously horrible publisher. They gave Iguanabee a year... A YEAR.

[@Satiire]

Yeah they're really bad. I don't understand how they keep getting access to these high profile IPs 😭

[@elvickRULES]

@@Satiirethat’s where all the budget goes, the licensing. It’s a shame as a lot of them have tons of potential. The Nickelodeon Kart racers aren’t bad though.

[@TheToaprimezilla]

Do the ascension events I. The tutorial events count towards the trophy? Because they did an update to the game because there are markers on the map now

[@riverpubby]

Imagine fucking up so bad that someone closes their game clears their skills 😅